Out of all the fucking cliches, it just had to be a buff Russian guy speaking broken English?!' I groaned inwardly, watching as the man raised his gun arm and leveled it at me.
I rolled to the side, picked up a sheet of metal lying on the ground, and ducked behind it to shield myself from the bullets as the man began firing. My bulletproof trench coat would have protected me, but I didn't know if that would make me fail the bonus objective.
"Harley! Who the fuck is this guy?!" I exclaimed as I turned to the crazy blonde who had already moved behind cover, having already gotten up and prepared for action.
"A Russian mercenary called Tittybeast or something," Harley replied as she peeked and started firing her guns at the muscular man, and I frowned as I raised my head from behind the metal sheet and saw the bullets bounce off his body without leaving a scratch.
"Tittybeast? That's a stupid fucking name!" I exclaimed, snorting despite myself, my eyes widening as I watched the man's prosthetic gun arm shift, revealing a hidden compartment that released three small missiles flying towards me.
I immediately raised the metal sheet and threw it at the rockets, causing two of them to explode, but I missed the other and had to run for cover at my fastest speed.
I lunged and hid behind a container, watching with wide eyes as the missile hit the spot where I was standing, creating a small crater.
"Foolish woman and boy. My name KGbeast!" the mercenary roared, sounding offended at how we butchered his name. "Black Mask is sending me to be killing you," he added, leveling his gun at me as he began approaching me while firing.
"Not much trouble being to kill woman and amateur," he concluded and began releasing more missiles in my direction. I immediately unleashed my steel wire and swung away, barely avoiding the shock wave that decimated the metal container.
'I need to close the distance... those missiles are bad news...' I thought as I swung to another cover, watching as Harley kept firing to no avail, the bullets bouncing right off the muscular mercenary.
'If I keep going like this, he'll hit me with those missiles sooner or later...' I gritted my teeth, trying to come up with a solution. I could close the distance if I just charged him, but I'll probably get shot, which means I'll fail the bonus objective, and I really wanted to finish this quest perfectly.
My eyes turned to my steel wire, and I suddenly had a crazy idea as I went over my perks and skills.
'Fuck it... it either works, or I fail the bonus objective...' I mused as I activated my 100% muscle usage and burst out of the cover, charging at the Russian mercenary.
"Foolish amateur, be coming out for KGbeast to be killing you?" The mercenary mocked me as he leveled his prosthetic arm at me and started firing. I felt my brain going into overdrive as I turned my metal wire into a blade and calculated the bullet's trajectory.
Tilting my head to the side, I dodged the first bullet as I leaped towards a container, using it as leverage to jump even higher. I spun myself in the air, dodging several more projectiles, but no matter how much I maneuvered myself in the air, the mercenary would be able to predict my landing spot.
And that's where my metal wire came in, as I shot it toward the ground and used it as leverage to perform another flip and land behind cover where the mercenary wouldn't have a clear shot at me.
It goes without saying that I wouldn't have managed to perform that kind of stunt if I didn't have superhuman strength, since pushing yourself off a thin metal wire requires a tremendous amount of muscle strength.
Still, I didn't linger behind the cover as the mercenary started slinging missiles at me again, forcing me to resume my charge. And Harley was finally making herself useful as she managed to sneak behind the mercenary and smashed her baseball club into the back of his knee.
The mercenary only momentarily staggered and quickly turned to Harley, kicking her away before turning back to me, but this momentary distraction was enough for me to close the distance.
I unleashed my steel wire, sticking it into the prosthetic gun's barrel, causing it to jam, as I gripped it and started channeling electricity through it towards the mercenary brute.
The mercenary grunted in pain and momentarily froze as the electricity coursed through his body. But he recovered quickly and reached towards the wire, yanking it away from the prosthetic gun.
He quickly let go of the wire and turned to me, but I was already within swinging distance, my fist already on a collision course with his abdomen. The mercenary couldn't react in time, and the punch connected, sending him flying back.
The Russian crashed into a container behind him, the force of the impact distorting the metal walls. He wasn't down for the count, as he quickly shook his head and tried to get up, but I didn't let up and charged him with a shoulder tackle.
The force of the impact proved too much for the flimsy container, and its already distorted exterior gave in, creating a hole through which I drove the mercenary through, pinning him against the container's interior wall.
I began raining punches on the Russian's stomach, gritting my teeth as he did the same, repeatedly bringing his closed fist and metallic gun at my back with enough force to make me stagger.
I raised my head and head-butted the mercenary, burying his head into the metal container wall as I caught his prosthetic gun arm when he tried to shoot me with it.
I tightly gripped it, taking a step back as I began kicking at his abdomen repeatedly while yanking at the prosthetic gun arm until I ripped it off, unphased by the splash of blood and his cry of agony.
Continuously kicking the mercenary, I didn't stop my assault until the force of my kicks opened another hole in the container, through which I sent him flying right through it.
I gave the prosthetic limb one glance before storing it in my inventory and charging toward the Russian, straddling him before he got up as I began punching at his face.
He tried to retaliate but I pushed his hand to the ground and kept it pinned there with my knees before resuming my assault on the Russian's face. He raised his head, grunting in pain as the dark red lens on his missing eyes glinted, and shot a laser at my face.
Luckily the laser took some time to charge and I managed to dodge it by tilting my head. However, the Russian took advantage of my distraction and freed his hand from under my knees, retrieving a knife from his waist.
He tried to plunge the knife into my side, but my bulletproof trench coat managed to stop it, and I retaliated with a continuous rain of punches.
I don't know what came over me, but I only snapped out of it when a splash of blood broke through my mask and hit me in the eye, causing me to stop and look at the mercenary.
I froze at the sight of the mercenary's face.
His mask was in tatters, revealing a bloodied face, swollen beyond recognition, with more than half of his teeth missing and his nose resembling a red paste more than anything else.
'Shit...' I felt the urge to vomit, but I pushed it down as I hastily got off the mercenary and backed away in a panic. My eyes unconsciously turned to my hands, my bloodied hands, and I felt my heart clench in anxiety.
'I... I did that...' My gaze alternated between my hands and the bloodied, unmoving mercenary, and the realization finally hit me; I had just beat someone to death.
I just took a life in such a gruesome way, but why am I not feeling anything? Why am I only thinking about ways to dispose of the body and hide evidence of my involvement? Why am I only concerned with getting away with it instead of feeling guilty?
I knew I'd have to kill someday and prepared myself for it despite not knowing what to expect. I assumed I might panic and flee the area after seeing what I did or that I might collapse on the ground, a crushing feeling of guilt bringing me to my knees.
But never in my wildest dreams did I imagine I might react so calmly to murdering someone.
And just as I was about ready to freak out, about not fracking out I was interrupted.
"First time?" I heard a cheerful voice coming from behind and acted on instinct, whipping at the speaker with my steel wire as I turned around in a hurry. "Watch it, Mistah," Harley said, having ducked to dodge my attack with a scowl on her face, causing me to sigh, the tension leaving my body as I retracted my steel wire.
"Ya okay there?" Harley asked as she slowly approached me, her gaze alternating between my bloodied hands and the equally bloodied, unmoving mercenary lying on the ground.
"I'm fine. I just lost control for a second," I blankly replied, shaking my head as I took one last look at the mercenary and turned away with a sigh.
"Sure ya are," Harley replied, rolling her eyes at me, clearly not buying it, but she quickly dropped the subject. "It's been nice workin' with ya, buddy, but I gotta go look for my babies now," she added as she turned around and walked away.
"You do that."
...
'I'm such a fucking asshole...' I sighed as I slumped into my chair, leaning back with a heavy sigh. I couldn't help but loath myself for what I did today, and I'm not talking about killing the Russian mercenary.
I lost control and beat the man to death, but I did it in self-defense, and he had it coming for going after me. It's how I reacted to the whole situation and what I did afterward that made me feel bad.
I didn't feel anything, no panic, no guilt, nothing, as I began thoroughly wiping any evidence and even used my new archetype power on a camera to wipe out the dock's entire network along with the cameras' footage.
Doing that, I made sure no solid proof of my presence remained. There was still the matter of the thugs I beat up and the civilians doing grunt work for Black Mask, but none of them saw me kill KGbeast or whatever his name was.
I did all of this without hesitation, but when it came to disposing of the body, I hesitated, and it wasn't for the right reasons. The mercenary's body was a literal treasure trove of technology, with countless cybernetic enhancements, and I couldn't bring myself to let it rot in some ditch.
Instead of letting the man rest in peace and giving him a proper burial or simply incinerating his body, I stored it in my inventory to study it later and reverse engineer the technology when I had the means and knowledge to do it.
'It's already done... there's no use brooding over it now...' I sighed, letting go of that line of thought as I turned to my system to see what new notifications popped up.
[+3 levels to the Brawling skill]
[Brawling (level 29)]
[+2 levels to the Acrobatics skill]
[Acrobatics (level 10)]
[+3 levels to the Programmer class]
[Programmer (level 5)]
[+9 stat points]
[You have finished the quest: Enter The Dragon III]
Enter The Dragon III:
Your teacher has given you the mission of clearing out a warehouse crawling with heavily armed thugs.
Primary Objective: clear out the warehouse (success).
Bonus Objective 1: take out all opponents (success).
Bonus Objective 2: don't get shot (success).
Bonus Objective 3: defeat the KGbeast (success).
Rewards:
Primary Objective: +5 skill levels to the Brawling Skill
Bonus Objective 1: random equipment
Bonus Objective 2: random equipment
Bonus Objective 3: unique random weapon
[Would you like to accept the rewards now? Yes/No]
'All objectives complete...' I smiled, feeling my mood improve as I suddenly remembered that I'd finally finished the quest perfectly with no failed objectives.
I'd already finished two other similar quests, but I failed all bonus objectives in the first and only finished one in the second, and although it didn't bother me at the time, it still felt good to finish the last one perfectly.
I contently sighed and turned to the quest's rewards, my eyes drawn to the third bonus objective's reward.
'Unique...?' I wondered, tilting my head, but I decided that thinking about it won't do me any good since I could see myself once I accepted the rewards.
'Accept.'
[+5 levels to the Brawling skill]
[Brawling (level 34)]
[+3 levels to the Programmer class]
[Progarammer (level 8)]
[+9 stat points]
[Randomizing equipment...]
[You have received the following pieces of equipment: (Riot Headgear) (Bowie knife) (Ebony & Ivory)]
[Riot Headgear: a cutting-edge, bulletproof, shock-absorbent military-grade helmet that comes fully equipped with an advanced air filtering system, night vision, and a tactical flashlight]
'Kind of looks like the ranger armor helmet from fallout new vegas...' I mused, inspecting the helmet as I held it in my hand. It looked like a soldier's helmet but with a gas mask, red lenses for eye protection, and a flashlight above the left ear area. It would fully cover my head should I wear it.
There were two air filters at the side of the helmet where the cheek area would be, with two tubes coming out of it and connecting to the slight protrusion that would cover my nose and mouth.
It was what I needed right now since my face was my vulnerability as my trench coat didn't cover it, and I often had to cover it with my hand in the middle of a fight, which was pretty inconvenient.
And if it's as advanced as the system said, then it should be able to filter out the nasty gasses like the stuff Harley used on me, which my gas mask couldn't handle. Anything other than those two benefits was a bonus.
'I wonder if the system is giving me what I need...?' I mused, quickly dropping the subject and moving on to the next piece of equipment.
[Bowie knife: a regular old sharp knife, a bit overpriced and cool looking, but that's it]
'No kidding...' I couldn't help but snort in amusement as I held the knife in my hand. It had a shiny steel blade that gave me a clear view of my own reflection and a wooden handle with brown leather wrapping around it.
It was probably the most useless thing the system ever gave me, but I knew I'd eventually get something like this since the rewards were supposedly random.
[Ebony & Ivory: a trademark pair of heavily customized semi-automatic M1911-style handguns designed to fire condensed energy projectiles (the pistols absorb energy directly from the user, and the wielder may control the lethality of the shots through the energy input)]
[Ebony has been modified for long-distance targeting and comfort, while the right-handed white gun, Ivory, was custom built for rapid firing and fast draws]
I whistled, raising an eyebrow as a pair of familiar guns appeared in my hand, one black, the other steel white. Both pistols had depictions of a woman, black-haired on Ebony and white-haired on Ivory on the outward-facing sides.
Looking at the nostalgic weapons, I had the sudden urge to take them out and try them immediately, but I pushed it down since I was tired and had no energy left.
'I might have to pick up the Gunman class next just for these pistols...' I mused, smiling as I put my finger on Ebony's trigger, sensing it trying to draw energy from me.
The pistols probably worked on the same energy I used to activate, giving me one more reason to invest stat points into my Spirit attribute.
'Speaking of that...' I mused, turning to my character screen. My spirit attribute was currently 41, and the quest rewards, along with the natural level-ups, had given me a surplus of 18 stat points.
'Might as well...' I shrugged as I invested 9 points into my spirit attribute, raising it to 50.
[Due to reaching a milestone in your Spirit attribute, your soul has evolved, and you have unlocked a new perk: (Energy Concentration)]
[Energy Concentration: The power to focus one's energy into any point of the body to perform attacks, techniques, or spells (if they are trained in the arcane arts)]
I froze as I felt a current of heat coursing through my body, giving me a sensation of vigor and energy stampeding through my every vein. I closed my eyes in concentration and reached out to the heat, and it responded by flooding towards my finger.
"Huh, neat..." I muttered, my eyes glued to my finger as it let out an intense golden light that was bright enough to light up my darkroom, causing me to grin at the new addition to my arsenal.
'I can already imagine the cool shit I'd pull off with this new power...'
Roman Sionis was the new, undisputed, absolute crime lord of Gotham City. He was everything this city deserved — and more. He was the darkness that filled the heart of every living soul in this sordid little town, including the blackest and most twisted of them all.
The mask destroyed his identity, creating another. It recreated Roman, and through the sublimation of personality, his inhibitions died, his nature altered—his deeper drives and more primitive instincts rising to the surface.
As Roman Sionis, he was weak, but as the Black Mask, there was no one stronger.
Black Mask didn't have any superpower or fancy ninja training. Such things weren't worth a tinker's damn. The only thing that counted was whether or not you had the will to do what needed to be done.
And it's that exact will that separated Black Mask from the rabble in Gotham city, what allowed him to climb into the position of the undisputed crime lord of the grim city.
Or so Roman Sionis, better known as Black Mask thought of himself. Whether such thoughts were facts or the narcissistic ramblings of s mad man, nobody knew, and even if they did, very few people would dare disagree with Black Mask to his face.
"What do you mean KGbeast hasn't reported back?" Black Mask asked, his tone eerily cold as he stared into eyes of the man standing in front of him, causing the latter to gulp nervously.
"I specifically instructed you to take some men and escort him into the docks..." Black Mask added, gently tabbing his finger at the chair's armrest, and the face of the man in front of him lost color with every tab, and word.
"H-he refused to let us escort him and even killed one of our boys..." the man stutteringly replied, uncomfortably adjusting the collar of his shirt as he began sweating profusely.
"But we found witnesses, and they reveled that Harley Quinn, and an unknown masked man attacked the warehouse..." the man quickly added in a panic, desperately trying to show his use when he saw Black Mask's finger stop tabbing.
"I see," Black Mask remarked in a neutral tone as he casually pulled out a gun from his pocket and shot the man dead. "Find Harley Quinn and bring her to me," he added, turning to the bodyguard standing beside him, unphased by the sight of the man he shot as the body fell to the ground, spewing blood on the expensive Persian rug.
"And send someone to clean this filth..."
...
Gotham City
An abandoned building in The Narrows
I squinted my eyes, glaring at the three bricks I placed ten meters away from me. My fingers twitched, and I immediately reached for Ivory, taking it out and firing five shots in the time it took for one to blink.
"Good thing no one is watching..." I muttered with a sigh, bitterly smiling while gawking at the three intact bricks, having missed every shot I took with Ivory.
I've spent the last three days cooped up in my apartment, waiting for the heat to die down as I kept fiddling with the laptop I stole, grinding the Computers skill, without much success as I only managed to raise it one level.
I needed a better computer if I was to grind the skill faster, so I contacted Selina and told her I needed something advanced, hoping she'd point me in the right direction.
I'm supposed to meet Selina later today since she said she also had something important to talk to me about and that we better discuss it in person.
Other than that, nothing worth mentioning happened, except for some increase in gang activity and violence according to the news, but it was nothing new or novel in Gotham so I didn't really give it much thought.
In any case, I got bored with staying cooped up in my apartment, so I went out to try my new toys, and even though I spent some time watching shooting tutorials, I still sucked.
'I can shoot just fine if I take my time, but rapid firing with Ivory is way beyond my level...' I mused, sighing as I put Ivory back into its inventory and drew Ebony.
I calmly aimed and fired at the first brick and didn't miss. The condensed energy projectile did nothing other than slightly push the target backward.
I increased the energy input and fired again, and the brick flew backward, still intact, causing me to smile as I raised the energy input to the maximum and fired at the second brick.
The shot connected, and the brick immediately burst into pieces.
'Nice... I definitely need to get better with using guns..' I smiled under my helmet as I made my way toward the last brick. I raised my index finger in front of my face and concentrated my energy into it, causing it to shine in a golden light that seeped out of my gloves.
I slowly reached for the last brick and gently tabbed it with my finger, causing it to shatter in the same manner as the second one did.
'Damn, I need to put more points into my spirit attribute...' I mused, feeling the drain using this move put on my energy reserve, which the system didn't deign to quantify for some reason.
'I still have the full day until it's time to meet up with Selina...' I mused as I stored my gear in my inventory, equipping my street clothes instead. 'I'm running low on money, and it's been a while since I practiced my crime skill...' I shrugged as I exited the abandoned building, making my way towards Uptown Gotham.
The Diamond District
"What is the Intergang doing in Gotham?" Batman blankly asked, staring into the eyes of the Penguin's henchman that was tied up and hanging upside down in front of the dark knight.
The Intergang specialized in peddling illegal alien technology and usually avoided Gotham because of the city's chaotic nature and the numerous gangs and supervillains controlling the town.
However, they suddenly came in full force and started making trouble all over the city, picking fights with every crime lord they could find without exception.
Black Mask, who was already going on a rampage in his search for Harley Quinn, didn't take kindly to the Intergang's intrusion into his city, and his gang quickly got into conflict with the newcomers.
And to make things worse, The Penguin, being the opportunistic crime lord that he was, started fanning the flames by attacking both parties and riling up other gangs to take action against Intergang as invaders to the city while plotting to overthrow Black Mask.
"I'm not telling you shit, freak," the henchman scowled, turning to the side and spitting in disgust. "I haven't done anything wrong. You can't touch me!" he calmly concluded, going quiet as he noticed Batman's eerily calm demeanor.
Batman didn't reply, and the gangster's eyes widened as the dark knight loosened the rope, causing him to fall headfirst into the ground while screaming and flailing around.
Batman tightened the rope and stopped him merely an inch away from the ground, pulling him back up until they were staring into each other's eyes again, causing the Penguin's henchman to gulp.
"Talk. Now," Batman instructed as he reached for the rope again, causing the henchman to panic immediately.
"I don't know much! I only know Intergang is here to look for someone who stole their shit!" the henchman exclaimed in a panic, unable to do anything but bitterly squirm around in the air.
"That's all I know, I swear!" and that was the henchman could say before Batman loosened the rope, making him fall again. He stopped before hitting the ground again, causing him to sigh in relief with sweat running up his forehead and falling to the floor.
He waited for several seconds, but Batman didn't pull him up again, and he immediately realized why.
"Hey! You can't leave me here!" the henchman exclaimed, but no answer came, as the dark crusader was already long gone.
East End
I squeezed the brakes, stopping my bike in front of Selina's club as I took off my helmet and made for the entrance. The bouncer nodded at me in greeting, and I returned the gestures as I made my way inside.
I made a straight line for the VIP booth and opened the door after knocking once, immediately spotting Selina sitting on a couch with a relaxed smile.
"Selina," I greeted with a nod. The brunette returned the greeting and gestured for me to take a seat. I obliged, leaning into the couch to make myself comfortable as I sat.
"I hear you and Harley were making yourselves busy," Selina said, raising an eyebrow as she smiled before I could get a word in, causing me to shrug my shoulders.
"We were after the same target, and we worked together since we'd only get in each other's way otherwise," I replied, gesturing to the side. I didn't feel like killing the crazy blonde anymore, but I still wanted nothing to do with her.
Besides being bat-shit crazy and unpredictable herself, Harley was connected to the Joker and Poison Ivy, two people I didn't want to touch with a ten-foot pole for apparent reasons.
"Black Mask doesn't seem to see it that way," Selina said, her smile disappearing, replaced by a frown. "He's been tearing down the city, looking for Harley and Harley alone," she added, her expression displeased as she gestured to the side.
'Good thing I covered my tracks and didn't kill his henchmen in the warehouse...' I mused, raising an eyebrow, but I didn't reply since Selina looked like she had more to say.
"Don't you think that's rather too convenient for you?" Selina blankly asked, giving me a bemused look, but she still had more to say, so I patiently waited.
"Almost as convenient as Intergang is turning Gotham upside down looking for me," the brunette added. Her expression finally showed signs of anger as she regarded me with an impatient expression.
"The USB stick?" I asked when Selina looked like she had finished speaking, keeping my tone and expression neutral. I might have overdone the hidden mastermind act, and she probably thinks I used her and Harley as scapegoats for Black Mask and the Intergang.
"It had blueprints for a kryptonite-based weapon and the plans to use it," Selina replied with a nod, still sounding pissed, but she was a bit calmer right now.
"And I'm guessing you passed it to Batman?" I asked, raising an eyebrow as she nodded. I already had a guess as to why Intergang was so pissed, but I still needed to be sure.
They probably intended to use the kryptonite weapon on Superman or something, but Catwoman passing the USB stick to Batman must have spoiled their plans, and they were here looking for her.
"I already informed you about the USB stick's origin when I gave it to you, Selina," I remarked, shaking my head as I heaved a sigh with an exasperated expression.
"You could have sold it, sent it back to Intergang, or even threw it in the trash, but you took it to Batman," I added, shrugging my shoulder, to which the brunette's eyes twitched in annoyance.
"I have no idea why they'd be looking for you since I took the USB stick from a rogue Intergang member myself, and it can't be difficult for them to find that out," I said, my tone genuinely confused.
I really didn't know why Intergang was targeting Selina instead of me.
...
"That's my line of thought exactly," Selina said, narrowing her eyes as she regarded with glaring suspicion she didn't even bother to hide.
'This is bad. No matter how I look at the situation, it looks as if I framed Selina...' I mused, furrowing my eyebrows as I began connecting the dots after speaking the facts aloud and putting things in perspective.
Selina was the one who gave the USB stick to Batman, but I'm the one who stole it, and even though Black Mask's goons and the rogue Intergang member are currently in Black Gate. It wouldn't be difficult for Intergang's people to question them in the prison to find out I was the one who took the money and the duffle bag, so they had no reason to go after Selina.
'Unless they knew, Selina was the one who gave the USB to Batman somehow...' my expression darkened as realization dawned on me.
Selina wasn't stupid enough to publicize the fact she fucked over Intergang. Batman wouldn't do that as well, and I sure as hell didn't do either.
Someone must have got wind of it somehow and spread the word to Intergang, and they probably had evidence because they wouldn't be coming in full force like this if they weren't sure Selina was the one to fuck them over.
"I understand your suspicion, but I believe I've made it abundantly clear that I had no ill will toward you, Selina," I replied, smiling as I shook my head in exasperation, shifting in my seat.
"And even if I wanted to act against you, I wouldn't go with such a shoddy, obvious plan," I added with a chuckle, shrugging my shoulders as I gestured to the side in dismissal.
"You're already suspecting me, and even if the Intergang got to you, you only need to point them in my direction, and they'll come for my head as well," I explained with a snort of derision.
I wasn't some diabolical mastermind, but if I wanted to get rid of Selina, I'd definitely come up with something more subtle that wouldn't immediately oust me as the main suspect.
"I'm sure you have evidence of me giving you the USB stick, after all," I concluded as I gestured towards a corner of the room that was the most likely to have a hidden camera.
"As for Harley, it's not my fault she didn't cover her tracks after murdering Black Mask's men in the warehouse," I explained, gesturing to the side in dismissal as I shifted in my seat.
"Then how else would you explain the Intergang coming after me? The only people who know about this matter are you, Batman, and myself," Selina said, her frown easing slightly, but she still looked suspicious and somewhat antagonistic.
"I don't know how, but someone else must have found out, and they probably had solid proof because the Intergang wouldn't invade Gotham City otherwise," I replied, spreading my arms with a shrug.
"However, I can say with certainty that the leak wasn't on my side," I added, giving her a meaningful look, to which she scowled, seemingly offended by my questioning of her abilities.
"Whether you believe me or not is entirely up to you, Selina. I've already displayed enough sincerity and goodwill," I remarked, leisurely waving to the side as if I didn't care, even though I greatly cared. I put too much effort into building a relationship with Selina and had a lot riding on said relationship.
"However, I am willing to help you, if you'd trust me, of course," I added, cutting her off before she could speak, making her pause as she gave me a confused look.
"Whoever did this did it to spread chaos in Gotham, to distract the Bat and the major villains and gangs in Gotham," I remarked, speaking in a matter-of-fact tone as I smiled.
"Someone is preparing to do something big, and we only need to wait to find out who and what," I explained with a chuckle. Anyone who had the recourses to pull this kind of shit would be a big player in Gotham.
Such people didn't half-ass things and would probably announce their plans at the last possible send for the entire world to see before acting because heroes wouldn't have a chance to stop them otherwise.
"Then it's only a matter of tracking them down and making them swallow their teeth," I concluded with a shrug as I smiled, leisurely leaning back into the couch.
It goes without saying that I wanted my own pound of flesh from whoever perpetrated this whole mess since they've made things difficult for me, intentionally or otherwise. I was petty like that.
"Are you suggesting I sit on my ass and wait while Intergang tears the city apart until some alleged mastermind shows his head?" Selina asked, frowning, as she seemed clearly bemused by my suggestion.
"I don't see why not," I replied, shrugging my shoulders and continuing before Selina could argue. "The Intergang is after you, and if you only need to lie low until Batman or the local gangs unite and kick them out of Gotham then there's nothing they can do about it," I added with a shrug. Such was the most optimal solution for Selina's problem, but I doubted she'd go for it since she's clearly still suspecting me.
I can work with that. In fact, I'd have more to gain if Selina refused my suggestion. Gotham was in chaos right now. Chaos meant opportunity, and I was nothing if not an opportunistic asshole, or so I recently learned about myself.
And sure enough.
"Well, I don't feel like doing nothing and waiting for whoever did this to show his head," Selina blankly replied, shaking her head. "I'm going to find out who did this, and I'm going to make them regret it," she added, and I didn't need to be a genius to understand the veiled threat in her words, causing me to smile.
"Well... if that's what you want, then it can't be helped..." I remarked, letting out a long sigh to show my reluctance as I shrugged my shoulders in dismay.
"I believe I can help you track down whoever orchestrated the whole affair," I said, letting out another sigh, putting on a hesitant expression as I looked down in thought, to which Selina's frown became more pronounced.
"I don't doubt your abilities, but whoever tipped the Intergang is likely very resourceful and has access to the city's surveillance system or something more advanced," I explained as I raised my head, meeting Selina's eyes.
The culprit was probably something of a computer wizard or an inventor of sorts since they wouldn't be able to spy on Catwoman and friggen Batman of all people without getting caught otherwise.
There was also the possibility that magic was involved, but it was minuscule at best. No mage, sorcerer, or wizard I knew of in the DC comics was patient enough to pull this kind of shit. Each and every magic used in this world was megalomaniac with no sense of subtlety, including most of the good guys too.
"I can't imagine they'd be able to track down and spy on someone like you and Batman otherwise," I remarked, smiling as I nonchalantly gestured to the side, showing her that I got over my reluctance.
"The problem with such people is that they tend to leave a digital trace, which I might be able to trace..." I added, and judging by Selina's expression, she probably saw the "but" coming from a mile away.
So I continued before she could interrupt me.
"However, I need access to an advanced computer to pull something like that, which brings me back to why I called you earlier," I explained, clearing my throat with a shrug.
The person who tipped the Intergang was likely some computer genius who could hack into the city's surveillance system. I could probably track them down if I had a reliable computer to grind my Computers skill more quickly.
On the other hand, Gotham City was a dump. And I could probably track down the perpetrator by simply accessing the public network and narrowing down the precious few places with a reliable internet connection.
Whoever did this need an extraordinarily stable internet connection. And after narrowing down the few places with that kind of connection, it would only be a matter of clearing them out one after the other until we found the target.
But Selina didn't need to know that, not if I wanted a shiny new computer and alien tech, which I totally did.
"Intergang is currently in Gotham, and I doubt anyone on the planet other than the Justice League or someone like Lex Luthor himself would have more advanced tech," I explained, my smile widening as realization downed on Selina's face.
"We attack Intergang, weaken their presence in Gotham, steal their tech, and use it to track down the person responsible for this mess," I remarked, spreading my arms to the side for mere dramatic effect. "Two birds with one stone, easy as that," I concluded with a chuckle as I leaned into the couch, sending the brunette a prying look.
I typically would have wanted to avoid shit like the Intergang at all costs, but that is not an option here, and even if it was, the temptation of alien technology was just too much for me to handle right now.
"Again... things seem to line up rather too conveniently for you..." Selina remarked with a sigh, raising an eyebrow. "But what you say makes sense..." she added, shaking her head as she got up.
"It's not that things line up to my convenience, Selina. They line up randomly, and I create my own convenience within..."
...
Lower Gotham
'What's with gangs and occupying abandoned buildings in this world...' I mused, shrugging as I activated the night vision function on my helmet to peek at the abandoned hospital before me.
Selina had agreed to my proposal despite seeming doubtful and hesitant, and we decided that she'd call me in three hours or so and give me the address of our first target.
'Still, this place has no sign of human presence...' I frowned under my mask as I inspected the area and found no traces of activity in the abandoned hospital or anywhere nearby, for that matter.
'Cloaking technology...?' I mused, tilting my head, but I didn't get to think about it too much as I noticed Selina, in her Catwoman costume, approaching through my pigeon drone.
"I like the new look— a bit too menacing for my taste, though," Selina remarked, gesturing towards my new riot headgear as she landed on the roof next to me, folding her whip and putting it away.
"I don't wear it for the looks," I replied, shrugging my shoulders. "So, what's up with the hospital? There's no sign of anyone occupying the place..." I added as I turned to the abandoned building, crossing my arms in front of my chest.
"Alien cloaking technology," Selina casually replied, as if those simple three words were enough to explain the situation, and I despised the fact they actually did.
"Makes sense," I replied with a sigh. "So, what's the plan? I'm not going in there blind," I firmly added, gesturing with my hand to the side as I let out a snort. Intergang had access to advanced weapons that could shred even my bulletproof into pieces, and I refused to walk into their base without knowing what I'd be dealing with first.
"And you won't have to. I'll sneak into the hospital and do something about the cloaking device," Selina casually replied. She regarded me with a confident smirk that I might have described as overconfident had it been anyone else.
"And how do you plan to do that, exactly? Who's to say they don't have alien movement sensors or something?" I mockingly asked, making air quotes with my fingers. Though I spoke jokingly, I wouldn't be surprised if they really had something like that.
"I wouldn't be surprised if they did. That's why I'm not going in there without a distraction..." Selina replied, smiling as she trailed off, and I heard the sound of gunshots echo in the distance before I could tell her to forget about it.
I turned to my pigeon drone's video feed and saw Harley Quinn giggling like a maniac as she sat behind the steering wheel of a convertible chevy, several cars chasing after her.
The cars were all black, their windows open with gangsters leaning out of them and firing at Harley's car as they chased behind her.
"Come and get me, losers!" the crazy blonde exclaimed as she made a sharp turn and crashed into the hospital's gate, disappearing as she entered the range of the clocking device.
"Really?" I said as I turned to Selina, who already had her whip out, preparing to swing her way into the hospital, to which she grinned without bothering to reply.
"You said you wanted to help. Here's where you can start," Selina said as she brandished her whip and jumped off the building, leaving me to sigh as I weighed my options.
I sighed after some hesitation as I watched Harley's pursuers head straight into the hospital right behind her, brandishing my steel wire as I made my way to the hospital.
I couldn't avoid this fight since I already fucked over Black Mask and the Intergang, and even though they're after Harley and Selina right now, it won't be long before they turn their sights to me, one way or the other.
They'd either get to the two women, which was highly unlikely, or get tired of wild goose and decide to go for another target to vent their frustration, which would be me, by the way.
I'd clash with them either way, so I might as well do it now and get it over with while I have people on the same boat (Selina and Harley) before they fully turn their attention to me.
'I'm getting used to this shit too quickly for my taste...' I mused as I loosened the steel wire flying over the hospital's gate, frowning as I saw the interior of the building's front yard after stepping into the range of the cloaking device.
And the first thing I saw was the fifteen-something gangsters taking cover behind their cars as they fired their guns at Harley, who was similarly taking cover behind her the convertible car and returning fire.
I landed in the middle of the gangsters, clustered behind the cars, a good number of them immediately turning to me. Not being the type to ask questions before shooting, they quickly raised their guns.
However, I was within swinging distance, and I didn't think twice before sending the nearest thug flying with a kick to the abdomen as I charged toward another.
I slapped his hand to the side as he tried to shoot me, making him hit one of his friends in the ankle by pure chance as I head-butted him, without sparing the thug another glance when he fell to the ground.
"Hey! Stop hoggin' up all the fun!"
Not one to be outdone, Harley scowled as she saw me kicking the gangster's asses, taking a massive chunk of their attention. She ran out from behind the car, somersaulting and cartwheeling her way from cover to cover toward the action while dodging bullets.
I rolled my eyes under my mask as I noticed the crazy blonde's actions in the corner of my vision, but I didn't pay her any attention as I gripped the head of the Black Mask Goon nearest to me, who was swinging at me with the butt of his gun.
I smashed his head into the car's window and threw him at another one of his buddies aiming at me, my display of superhuman strength causing even more gangsters to focus on me.
Several gangsters began firing at me, and I started sprinting to the side, my speed making it difficult for the thugs to aim as their bullets hit everything in the vicinity other than me.
Although I wasn't yet able to pull a Neo and dodge bullets while standing in place, my swift movement made it very difficult for anyone but the best sharpshooters to hit me if I moved at top speed unless I was running towards them in a straight line of course.
I took out Ivory and returned fire while running, feeling the urge to slap myself as all my shots missed except for one that hit one of the thugs in the forehead, causing him to grunt, his eyes rolling back as he collapsed on the ground, very much unconscious.
"I'm right here, ya punch of incompetent cheese-farts!" Harley exclaimed as she finally reached the chaotic melee that was the cluster of cars, gangsters, and me kicking their asses.
She jumped, doing a flip in the air as she landed on the shoulder of the nearest thug, proceeding to thrash him with her fist until he fell to the ground, causing her to cackle as she jumped at the next thug.
I sighed in exasperation at her rowdiness as I kept dodging bullets, thrashing everyone in my way, and it took no more than five minutes for me and the crazy blonde to take everyone out.
"Kitty wasn't sure ya were gonna help, but I knew ya would," Harley said, grinning as she approached me after snapping the last thug's neck with a broad grin splitting her face. "Sure took yer sweet time, though," she added with a slight chuckle, shrugging her shoulders.
"Yeah? Well, I'm regretting it already," I said, sighing and catching Harley's wrist as she walked to my side and tried to wrap her arm around my neck in a gesture of friendliness that I wanted no part in, causing her to pout.
"Awe! And here I thought we were finally startin' to get along," Harley said, rolling her eyes at me with an exasperated expression. "Love the new look, by the by," she added as she stopped in front of me, gazing at my helmet.
"My old one wasn't doing it for me anymore," I remarked, my body going tense as I heard a loud click reverberated across the hospital, prompting me to look around to an electric field materialize around the building and immediately dissipate.
"Relax, that was probably kitty takin' care of the alien mumbo jumbo device hidin' the place," Harley said, leisurely smiling as she looked around in amusement.
I didn't reply, finding myself having a familiar sense of deja vu as I noticed something lurking on the hospital's walls.
"Look out!" I exclaimed, wrapping my steel wire around Harley and yanking her away just in time to avoid the furry, 6.4-foot-tall creature that lunged at her from the walls.
...
"You gotta be kidding me! A werewolf?! Really?!" I exclaimed, gritting my teeth as I watched the creature turn to me, growling menacingly and bursting into a mad sprint on all fours toward me.
"Harley?! Do you have any idea who this guy is?" I asked, taking a step back as the werewolf reached me and swung his dark, gleaming claws at my throat.
"No Idea, but we got more company!" Harley replied, causing me to frown as I stepped forward, driving my fist into the werewolf's chest, sending it sliding back with a broken rib cage, spewing blood.
"Ya can take care of the big furball there, an' I'll take care of the flyin' freak show!" she added, causing me to inspect the surroundings to see several men coming out of the hospital's windows, floating in the air as they stood on transparent orange disks.
'This guy isn't invulnerable like Croc and the Russian mercenary, at least... I'll take care of him quickly and help Harley...' I mused as I turned back to the werewolf, and it took all of three seconds for my hopeful line of thought to come crashing down.
'A fucking healing factor!' I felt my eyes twitching under my helmet as I watched the bloody gash on the werewolf's chest quickly heal and the blood leaking from his mouth to stop as he howled and charged me again.
I took a deep breath, pushing down my frustration as I waited for the werewolf to reach me and swing again. I caught the furry creature's wrist and spun to the side, tripping and launching it over my shoulder and into the ground.
'I need to finish this quickly...' I frowned in concentration, channeling my energy into my right fist, making it glow under my gloves as I lowered my posture to drive my fist into the werewolf's head and hopefully end it quickly.
However, my fist was an inch away from the creature's face when I felt something hit me in the side with a force of a speeding car, sending me rolling away from the werewolf.
I rolled on the ground and quickly regained my posture with a flip, getting back to my feet as I turned to the side and immediately spotted a man with a large smoking muzzle that looked like it belonged to a bazooka attached to his wrist instead of a hand.
"What the hell are you doing, Abbot? Get your shit together!" the man who'd just shot me exclaimed, addressing the werewolf as the latter got off the ground, shaking its head, a gleam of clarity flashing in its eyes.
I scowled, holding my broken ribs as I felt them heal, retrieved Ivory from my inventory, and started firing at the werewolf to pin it in place while I charged the man with the gun hand.
The man leveled his hand at me, and my eyes widened as I saw a white, spherical projectile form inside the muzzle at an alarming rate, causing me to dodge to the side as it passed right by my head, pushing my hoody back.
I wasn't a sharpshooter in the first place, and moving so quickly made me mess several of my shots at the werewolf, giving it time to heal and charge me, tackling me into the ground before I could reach the man with the gun hand.
We rolled on the ground because of the force of the impact, and when we finally stopped, the werewolf was straddling me, its white fangs dripping saliva when it opened its maw and tried to bite at my head.
I moved my head to the side, causing the werewolf to bury its head into the dirt as I slithered my hand into its chest and pushed, making it fly upward with another jet of blood splashing from its mouth.
I quickly got up, driving my knee into the werewolf's abdomen before it could hit the ground and then my elbow into its back, grabbing its tail as I spun it and sent racing toward the man with the gun hand.
The man didn't hesitate for a second before raising his hand and shooting the werewolf to kill its momentum and stop the crash, and that was enough time for me to close the distance as I jumped over the creature and lunged at him.
He quickly raised his hand in my direction, another white projectile forming in his hand cannon, and I used my steel wire to force the projectile's trajectory away from me.
I gripped the hand cannon with my right, taking out my new knife and holding it in my left as I swiped at the hand-cannon, severing it right off of his arm and kicking him into the wall behind him.
He exclaimed in agony, holding the profusely bleeding stump that splashed blood everywhere where, and I put him out of his misery with a kick to the side of his head, knocking him out as I stored the severed hand-cannon into my inventory.
By the time I finished dealing with the gun-man, the werewolf had already recovered from the wounds its friend and I inflicted and was already menacingly charging at me with a wide-open maw.
Although the werewolf was acting with more clarity now, and his hits were more deliberate and vicious, displaying a basic understanding of martial arts, I spent most of my days getting my ass whopped by Richard.
Suffice to say. The creature was no match for me in that department.
'Now I can take him out without worrying about being shot...' I mused, ducking under the werewolf's swing, its sharp claws flying right above the antenna on the right of my riot headgear.
'Let's try subduing him first...' I dodged another swing, stepping forward as I kicked the werewolf's chin, only to bring my foot down at the top of his head when he staggered, burying his head into the ground.
I moved behind the werewolf and shot my steel wire at his back, impaling his lung and pinning him to the ground as I started channeling electricity through it, causing it to howl in agony.
I moved to stomp his ankles, unphased by the sickening crunch as I straddled the creature's back, and began raining punches on its head without stopping the electric current.
I frowned as I watched the werewolf's head regenerate, its thick skull continuously healing. I continued to break it repeatedly, even while slowly but steadily raising the electric charge, but the creature still stubbornly regenerated through everything.
'Looks like I'll have to go with the lethal option...' I frowned and began channeling energy towards my fist as I raised it high, preparing to pulverize the werewolf's skull that could do nothing but howl in agony and squirm around to no avail at this point.
I brought my fist down, hitting the werewolf's skull with a radiant, golden show of light, and it finally stopped howling as I got off its back and turned to Harley to see her, wobbly flying around in one of the Intergang's flying disc thingies.
She cackled in glee despite her clumsy steering as she dodged multiple energy blasts that the five remaining gangsters shot at her with the golden staves in their hands.
'Might as well get some target practice...' I shrugged my shoulders as I took out Ebony and began firing while taking my time with every shot, but I still only managed to land two in every three.
And by the time I took out three of the gangsters, Harley had already taken care of the rest and came flying right at me with a broad grin, splitting her face.
My eyes twitched, and I stepped to the side to avoid her, but she seemed to have a knack for steering the flying disc devices, and she braked right beside me and lunged at me with wide-open arms.
"Ya saved my rear again!" Harley exclaimed as she clung to my shoulder, and I sighed, pushing her face away when she tried to rub her cheeks against my helmet.
"Don't get used to it..." I replied, prying the crazy blonde off my shoulder while feeling an urge to take off my mask to rub my forehead in exasperation, already questioning my decision to save her.
"Yer just saying that! Yer probably already enchanted by bodacious bongos and resplendent rear end!" Harley replied as she made a pose that emphasized her curves.
"It's not that resplendent..." I replied, rolling my eyes as I turned to the werewolf, freezing as I found no trace of him. Inspecting the area, I immediately spotted him slinging the gunman over his shoulder and taking off, running out of the hospital.
"Hey! The losers are runnin' away!" Harley exclaimed as she watched the werewolf take off with his friend. I hesitated for a moment, but I shook my head and decided to let them go.
"It's too dangerous to chase after them blindly," I remarked as I looked away from the werewolf, turning to the hospital.
"Besides, we're not here for them," I concluded as I walked to the hospital's entrance, picking up the nearest living thug and dragging him along for the ride.
...
"You guys finished already?" Selina asked, smiling as she sat behind the hospital manager's desk when she spotted us walking in on her.
"No thanks to you," I replied, my eyes twitching in annoyance at how leisurely she looked, sitting behind the desk with her legs resting on it like she owned the place.
"That's Kitty for ya; always leavin' the fun to others," Harley said as she walked behind Selina, proudly slapping the latter's shoulder. "Such a kind soul," she added, meaning every word of it as I didn't detect a single hint of sarcasm in her tone.
"I'm sure she's a saint..." I remarked, rolling my eyes as I inspected the area, noticing a small briefcase that didn't look like it could fit anything inside resting on top of the desk.
"Is that what we came for?" I asked, gesturing towards the briefcase, and Selina nodded as she opened it, revealing it to be a futuristic-looking laptop with a sleek design.
It didn't have a keyboard but a blue touching pad screen instead, and it had two extra folds going to the sides, one of which (the left) had a keypad, and the other had a monitor.
"It is, but it's locked. It probably has some recognition system installed," Selina added, pointing at the protruding sensor over the laptop's primary monitor with a helpless shrug.
"Then it's a good thing I brought this guy along," I said, smiling under my mask as I approached the laptop, still dragging the gangster I brought along from the yard.
I raised the gangster's face and put it in front of the screen, only to frown as I heard a ding, and a window with the words "access denied" appeared on the monitor.
I reached toward the gangster's eyelid, pried it open, and nodded as the face sensor retracted, and a thin line appeared on the screen, causing me to tilt my head.
"What's this now?" Harley said, scratching her head, and the line began moving as she spoke, to which I immediately realized it was probably a sound recognition function.
'Looks like this isn't your lucky day...' I mused as I turned to the gangster, gesturing for Harley to raise his hand, to which she did despite looking slightly confused.
I took a deep breath as I jabbed my thumb into the gangster's armpit, targeting one particular nerve, which caused him to shiver as he regained conscience and started screaming.
I turned to the voice recognition function and smiled as I watched it disappear, replaced by a square with a fingerprint inside. Shrugging my shoulder, I knocked the gangster out and put his thumb on the screen.
"Seriously?" I sighed as I watched the voice recognition function disappear, replaced by a password tab, and felt the urge to grab the laptop and send it flying out the window.
"Wake 'em up and gimme five minutes. I'll get the password," Harley said, grinning as she suggested violence, and I was about to agree when I remembered something from the comics.
"Hold on, let me try something first," I said as I approached the laptop and started typing. The two words "Darkseid is" appeared on the screen, and I pressed enter only to get an access denied prompt.
"Darkseid is...? What's that mean?" Harley asked, scratching her head as she watched me type the same password while adding 123 at the end and get another access denied prompt.
"It's a chant," I replied with a shrug as I began trying other combinations."These people, the Intergang, they work for Darkseid. You know the guy, tall, dark, once bitch slapped superman across the galaxy?" I added, raising an eyebrow at Harley's careless expression and Selina's shocked one.
"That's news to me... but what does the chant mean?" Selina asked in a curious tone, quickly pushing down her surprise as she uncomfortably shifted in her seat.
"It means he's something, and everyone else, everything else, is nothing," I casually added, and my response got a reaction from even Harley this time as she seemed taken aback.
"In other words, Darkseid is, and we, as in every other sentient being in the universe, are not," I explained, holding back a chuckle as I watched Harley go still in thought, trying to process my words and their meaning.
"Darkseid is a megalomaniac, and his followers are zealots and fanatics, so take it with a grain of salt," I concluded, dismissing the subject before I caused Selina and Harley to suffer an existential crisis.
Darkseid might be a megalomaniac, but he had every right to be one. I even remember reading something about the real Darkseid being a higher existence with an avatar in every version of the DC universe.
The article, which I read out of sheer boredom in my past life, also said that the real Darkseid couldn't even enter the multiverse because his mere presence might cause it to collapse, so his original body resides in a higher reality or something along those lines.
So the chant that Darkseid is might be true, but Selina and Harley didn't need to know that since one crazy guy questioning reality (me) was more than enough for one world.
"And bingo... I'm in..." I remarked, sighing in relief as I finally got the password; Darkseid is, but in all caps and two exclamation marks at the end.
"I'll copy the database into an external, locked device with no access to the Internet or any network and erase everything..." I said as I began doing just that and was pleasantly surprised that the laptop came with several external, detachable hard-drive-ish devices after some dabbling.
I'd already disconnected the laptop from the internet and deactivated the microphone and the camera before I started talking, so there was no worry of Intergang members listening to the conversation.
Thank god whatever alien software this laptop used to run was so simple and easy to figure out since it was probably made or customized for convenience so that humans with no knowledge of alien tech could use it.
"Can't we use that to track down the rest of 'em Intergang douche-nozzles in Gotham or somethin'?" Harley asked, tilting her head as she looked at me in puzzlement.
"Maybe we can, but they'll likely track down the laptop and come to retrieve it first," I replied with a shrug as I finished copying the laptop's database and used my network crash ability to deactivate anything I might have missed, like bugs and whatnot.
"There," I said, sighing as I closed the laptop and stored it directly in my inventory. Selina had already made it clear that she knew about my ability, and Harley had seen it firsthand in the warehouse and here, so there was no need to hide it.
"Will you be able to track down the so-called mastermind with this?" Selina asked, unphased by my display as she didn't even bother to hide the face she still suspected me.
"I'll need some time to install a new operating system and make adjustments first..." I replied, shrugging my shoulders as I crunched the numbers in my head, calculating how long it would take.
"I'll be able to track him down in a week, give or take a couple of days," I concluded as I turned to the unconscious thug and started looting his body. There's no way I'd leave without taking some of that yummy alien tech lying on the ground.
I also planned to kook for the cloaking device and, if Selina hadn't already destroyed or stolen it herself, along with whatever I managed to find in the hospital. Finders keeper and all that.
"Then I guess we'll finally see in a week's time," Selina replied, narrowing her eyes as she turned to leave, making her way towards the window cause whoever invented doors could go fuck himself. Am I right?
"Seya, pal!" Harley said as she walked past me, patting my shoulders on her way, and I merely nodded at her, too busy stuffing my inventory with the gangster's energy rods and flying discs.
Unknown location
"All according to plan..." said a man, wearing a red theatrical suit and a golden, full-face yellow mask as he sat in a dark room, staring at the many computer screens before him.
"Soon, freedom will be absolute. The current world order will be abolished, and the people's voice will be heard, listened to, and obeyed!" the man said, raising a clenched fist as he stared at the computer screen showing Black Mask gang and Intergang members killing each other.
"The world will know Anarky and the people shall rejoice!"
...
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