A/N: Warning; this part will stir some stomachs, and should considered 'cursed' (as Nuuo put it) by any sane individual.

He also wished that it be noted that he;

'tried my best for the ending to be alot less cursed, but was denied'.

Special thanks to Nuuo for Beta-Reading, and for attempted de-cursing :P

Originally Uploaded as chapter 50 of the Oneshot Collection.


Lisa Loud The Broodmother 2: Expect the Unexpected.

Despite the fact that he hadn't left the house in months, had lost his girlfriend and any semblance of a normal life and had spent those same months watching with a combination sick fascination and utter despair as his sister rapidly grew into some immobile caricature of an obese person;

Being Lisa's caretaker wasn't as a bad as Lincoln had expected.

SQUELCH

It was far, far worse.

He'd expected the hour-long 'baths' that were needed to cleanse Lisa's bulbous, small whale sized body, if not the reality of having to clean the undulating mass of taut skin and flesh with a combination of hoses, sponges and squeegees. Even now, the lengthy process of gently scrubbing the frequently sweating and stinking body that was once the relatively short and svelte form of Lisa Loud still nauseated him- for the swollen, room sized blob (with the occasional limb or singular head sticking out) retained all the human-necessary hygienic habits with a multiplication by the number of new humans growing within her.

He had expected to have to spend hours feeding the genius with both their father's many meals, and then making up the caloric deficiency the over twenty disparate growing bodies within Lisa's own needed by grinding up the precise mixture Lisa had dictated into buckets worth of paste, pouring it into a machine and then sticking the hose that fed her for hours at a time into her mouth. He had expected to perform routine maintenance (guided by Lisa of course) on the machines hooked to her to keep her nigh-elephant sized mass alive and well. He even expected, and weathered the constant and irrational mood swings and blame the immobilised scientist lay upon his shoulders while he cleaned and moisturised her body.

("Leese, couldn't you just make a machine for this?"

"Certainly, but your services have been volunteered so why engage in such superfluous activities?")

He wasn't even surprised when she demanded he perform some kind of ultrasound on her ever-expanding belly with one of her glowing inventions. He simply drew the beeping and whirring object over her smooth skin without complaint or question while she observed the results thereof on one of the overhead monitors that had been installed in the ceiling. Her satisfaction at the results was… honestly more ominous than anything else really, but he had long since learnt to roll with whatever nonsense Lisa was clearly preparing.

("Lisa, are you sure this is just some kind of ultrasound? I think it's making my fingernails grow faster on the hand I hold it with."

"I'm certain that no permanent harm will be induced by the device.")

But with Lisa Loud, there was always some kind of unexpected complication.

Like how the many children floating around inside her stomach liked to reach through her skin at him whenever he was close by for example.

The man was doing the usual bi-daily cleaning required to keep Lisa's undulating mass relatively hygienic, bearing his standard equipment of a soapy bucket, step ladder, squeegee and rag while standing atop a step ladder to get to Lisa's now ceiling-high stomach when he felt something poking at him.

Rolling his eyes he sighed and continued to scrub away at the top of Lisa's flesh- only for the poking to become more insistent.

"Elder Brother Unit." Lisa's tired voice called out. "You are well aware that they shall not cease until-"

"Yeah, yeah I know." Lincoln sighed, and put down his rag.

He looked down, and sure enough; there they were.

Over two dozen little faces and twice as many arms pressing through the thin flesh of Lisa's 'stetchified' skin and organs. Each with slightly different features if he looked hard enough, but staring at him with unerring accuracy despite the obvious obscuring their mother's (or surrogate's depending on one's perspective) skin provided by covering their eyes. Their tiny hands stretched through the skin with questing fingers that poked and prodded at his stomach, some even futilely trying to grip at his shirt.

Suppressing a shudder, the tired man knelt down to the rough centre of the mass. The faces as always seemed to sense where he was, and crowded as best they could into that one spot.

The first few times they'd done it, Lincoln had been deeply disturbed. Fortunately; he'd gotten used to it.

Being disturbed that was, nothing could make a wall of skin-covered baby faces normal.

Or the many hands that swayed through the stretched flesh try and find him. One from the closer faces finally brushed against his cheek, and the little face seemed to smile as it drew both hands to latch onto his face.

"Morning kids…" Lincoln muttered, as the other hands rapidly started to find and feel his face. "Yep, just get right in there. Nothing weird about th- owww…"

One of them had managed to poke his open eye again.

"I would appreciate it if you would commence the standard progeny pacification procedure post-hate!" Lisa curtly requested. "The sensation is… undesirable."

"I'm on it." Lincoln droned as best he could through stiff lips, keeping them as closed as possible lest literal hundreds of fingers slip in like they had his nostrils. He gently pushed forwards, letting the hands draw across his face until he reached the face in the centre.

The face opened its mouth wide as he approached.

Then Lincoln, slowly and carefully brought his lips to the forehead of the face. The face brightened as it sensed his approach and, ignoring the sensation of taught flesh upon his lips, the unsettled father to be proceeded to give his unborn progeny a firm in-utero kiss.

The two arms wiggled in apparent glee, and the face drew away with a little shlorp, hands disappearing into the flesh as easily as they had once appeared as their owner swam away in satisfaction.

"One down…"


Then there was Ronnie Anne.

He'd expected her to be angry.

He'd even expected her to break up with him for the umpteenth time and kick him out of their apartment for good.

He hadn't expected her to visit him in his new prison, especially considering the very reason she'd so furiously ended things was so prominently on display.

But nonetheless, one day after he was just done cleaning Lisa and was stripping off his gloves- Lincoln Loud looked up at the sound of the basement door opening and found himself quite surprised to see one Ronnie Anne Santiago staring down at him with something like apprehension.

"R-Ronnie?" He fumbled the last glove and it dropped into the bucket of waste-infused water with a plop as he laid eyes upon his on and off-girlfriend for the first time in months. "What are you doing here? I didn't think I'd-"

"See me again?" Whatever nerves the woman felt disappeared under her usual bravado. "Yeah, I didn't see us meeting up again either after what you pulled. But Lori mentioned she needed to bring some stuff down to Royal Woods and I was heading this way anyway; so I brought some stuff over."

She held up a bag of basic human hygiene supplies, all desperately needed for the now eternally grimy man.

Lincoln could buy the story if it was anyone else; it was true that Lori (and everyone else who'd fallen prey to Lisa's A.S.S.N.T.I.T.T.Y., or 'Super Sybian' as their mother had dubbed it) was sending them supplies of things when they could since they were at least partially responsible for the situation he and Lisa were in.

But Lori could have waited, she could have sent anyone who hadn't recently tried to belt his head off to the next state.

And Ronnie could have said no.

But she was here anyway.

Suddenly Lincoln was aware of how disgusting he looked, his standard orange polo was filthy and the long sleeved white shirt he wore under it had collected enough stains on the arms to make the original colour questionable. His face prickled with poorly-shaved stubble and the bags under his eyes were probably dark enough to be mistaken for makeup.

"… You've looked better Lincoln," Ronnie cast an appraising eye over his form, a touch of amusement in her voice as she started down the stairs. "Seriously, you look like you got lost in Scratchy Bottom for a week."

"Yeah, well…" Lincoln's brain tried to form some witticism to get a good back and forth going, but a quick glance downwards confirmed that Ronnie was probably being generous. "… I feel like it too." He instead admitted.

Two feet appeared in his vision, and he looked up to find Ronnie Anne examining him. "Lori told me you were taking care of Lisa, not volunteering as an experiment or something. How come you look half dead?"

Lincoln stopped for a moment in disbelief, then pointedly looked at the wobbling wall of flesh next to him.

"What?" Ronnie snapped in annoyance. "It's one of your sisters' weird experiments or something right?"

The cogs of Lincoln's mind turned.

In the years they were together, and before he had moved out, Ronnie Anne had been to his house often enough that she'd seen (and been subject to on occasion) the many twisted results of Lisa's experiments. Add in that Lisa's head was currently facing the basement window and hidden by her vast mass; the thing taking up multiple square metres of space probably just looked like a lump of meat that Ronnie's past experiences would lead her to believe was just one of Lisa's many weird inventions, or accidents.

Or on purpose inter-reality breaches resulting in another abomination trying to birth itself again.

"Look Loud," Ronnie's voice became sharp again. "I just came down from GLC to help you out since I still want to be friends, but if you're not going to-"

"Just give me a minute." Lincoln pinched the bridge of his nose to try and fight off the incoming headache. "… Did you ever find out what happened to the babies?"

" 'The babies'." Ronnie's voice became cold. "You mean your millions of bastards you had with your sisters when we were still together? Those babies?

No.

No, for some reason I never asked." Ronnie's cheeks darkened with rage. "Believe it or not I had other priorities these past few months than the kids you ended our relationship with!"

Lincoln sighed, "look; I'm going somewhere with this alright?"

Ronnie stared daggers at him, but said nothing.

The man swallowed, "w-well you might have noticed Lori's not pregnant anymore, and neither are most of my sisters-"

"I thought she'd aborted it." Ronnie curtly cut in.

"… She didn't," Lincoln corrected. "And neither did the rest of them."

He waited for a moment, letting his words sink in.

"But Lori's not pregnant anymore," Ronnie's eyebrows tightened in confusion. "I just heard you say so!"

"And she isn't." Lincoln confirmed. "Because the babies aren't in any of them anymore, except for Lynn anyway."

Ronnie's eyebrows raised for a moment, then she snorted in disbelief, " 'except Lynn'? What, did you stick 'em all in her like a clowncar? Because I've gotta say, I saw her a while back and she didn't look pregnant with twenty kids!":

Lincoln felt a smirk of satisfaction form as her pointed at Lisa. "No. Not in Lynn."

Ronnie's eyebrows raised again, and she gave the wobbling mass another look.

Lincoln could practically see the wheels in her mind shifting as she approached the flesh without him. She stood there and watched as the giant belly jiggle slightly with Lisa's breath and pulse.

Ronnie turned to look back at him with wide eyes. "W-what is this?"

"This?" Lincoln walked over and stood just within a foot of the body, next to Ronnie. "This is where the babies wen-"

"AyDiosmio- what is that!" Ronnie gasped, then backed away, pointing at something beside the platinum blond.

Lincoln rolled his eyes, and looked down to see one of his kids pushing their faces through Lisa's skin.

"That's one my kids being creepy again." Lincoln sighed, then walked towards Ronnie. A quick look back confirmed the face retreating back into the skin with a ripple. "For some reason they know when I'm close and they like to say hello. I don't know how or why, maybe they get bored in there or something-"

"What even is this thing!?" Ronnie started backing up the stairs in horror as she looked over the meat sack again. "S-some kind of- I-I don't know what- artificial womb? A-A-"

Whatever Ronnie might have said was lost to history as one Lisa Loud finally spoke up, "I think, Miss Santiago, that you will find that I am quite organic at the moment."

Ronnie's eyes widened, then darted from one end of the flesh lump to the other until she spied an atrophied limb poking out to confirm the thing was a human, then to Lincoln. "That's Lisa?"

Lincoln nodded numbly. "Yep. All seven h… well we don't have scales that fit her anymore so-"

"My weight and volume has well exceeded the standard human deviation, this is obvious to anyone with functional ocular organs." Lisa' voice sniped.

"What happened to her!?" Ronnie's eyes bulged.

"Lisa didn't want the babies to be aborted but no one but Lynn wanted to carry theirs, and we needed somewhere to put them; so…" Lincoln waved towards Lisa. "Tadaa, I guess."

Ronnie's jaw dropped and she stumbled slightly as she crept closer to Lincoln. "She… she's pregnant!?"

"Yep."

"W-with how many?" Ronnie' gripped his arm and stared at him with wild eyes. "H-how many kids does she have inside her to do that to her?"

Lincoln issued a hollow smile. "All of them.

Except Lynn's," he quickly amended. "She wanted to keep one. So about… twenty or so."

"Veinte!?" Ronnie stared at the mass. "S-she's pregnant with that- so many… so much pregnant…"

Her voice warbled as she spoke, and Lincoln was surprised to see her knees start to shake.

"It's a bit to take in I know." Lincoln soothed as best he could, but honestly; Ronnie had been to his house enough that even this shouldn't have affected her so strongly. "But-"

There was a dull thump as the bag of supplies landed on the floor, the handles having fallen from loose fingers.

Ronnie Anne Santiago's face flushed dark.

"… Ronnie?" Lincoln raised a hand in worry, but Ronnie pulled away seemingly on instinct as she took a step towards Lisa.

Lincoln watched as she took another shuddering step forwards.

Then another.

And another, and so on until she reached the nearest patch of beige, veiny, skin.

"Ronnie, you okay?" He called out, only to be ignored once more. "Do you-"

Ronnie suddenly leant forward and gently sank into the firm mass.

"-want me… to…"

A low, but unmistakable sound of a mouth sucking on skin started to echoed through the room.

"… call someone?"

"Fraternal Unit?"

"Yeah Leese?"

"Is Miss Santiago presently suckling my abdominal region?"

"… Yep, that's pretty much what I'm looking at." His eyes narrowed with a sudden suspicion, "you didn't do something to her did you?"

"If you mean to imply that I have used some method to alter Miss Santigao's behaviour from her baseline, then you are mistaken." Lisa primly responded. "But I believe that one of existing hypothesis about her paraphilias' might provide an answer."

"Paraphilia?" Lincoln's mind tugged at the unfamiliar word… "… that's like a fetish right?"

*Shhlllllllrrrppp*

Ronnie's head swayed from side to side she suckled deeper, and a vile sound emitted from the part of Lisa's body she had buried herself within. While he winced at the horrid sound Lincoln's eye unfortunately caught sight of Ronnie's pants, and how they had noticeably darkened around her crotch and inner thighs.

"… Nevermind." He shook his head, "I'll go get the hose or something-"

"That will not be necessary." Lisa interrupted. "This was not an unanticipated-"

*Shhhllrrooooppp*

"Ah, eventuality." Lisa gasped. "I believe that Miss Santiago will 'disengage' herself within a few hours without intervention."

"Oh…" Lincoln looked on at the wobbling pile of meat his one-time partner was attempting to suck dry with more fervour than she'd ever displayed with him. "I'm…"

*Shlllrr*

"I'll-"

*Shlliiippp*

"I'm just gonna go upstairs."


He hadn't expected for Ronnie Anne to move in either, but after she and Lisa 'hit it off'- Lincoln found himself with a helper of sorts in the form of his old flame. Ronnie simply moved her things from her family's apartment and took up residence in the Loud House to join him in caring for her new…

Paramour?

Sex friend?

Object of affection?

Whatever the relationship where one party was a nigh deranged obsessive eagerly attending the every whim of the other in exchange for some basic token of approval...

The true word for Ronnie's position struck the platinum blond about a week after Ronnie had unceremoniously moved in, and he was atop his step ladder trying to re-attach the stretchy bra that somehow fit across Lisa's body after the routine cleaning.

"… And don't forget the folds…." He heard Lisa mutter. "Diaphoresis under my present circumstances can result in… congealing issues."

"Of course…" Ronnie purred, her cheeks as flushed as always when she attended Lisa. "I'll get right on it, a-and did you like my-my Abubela's special Nachoes?"

"Indeed," Lisa affirmed. "They were an exceptional deviation from my standard diet."

Lincoln winced as a high-pitched 'squee' pierced the air.

"That's great!" Ronnie practically squealed, "I- I mean; my Abuela worked really hard on them just for you!"

Lincoln rolled his eyes, pointedly averting them from the sight of his one time love drooling, practically whimpering over Lisa's praise. Never in in wildest dreams would have imagined that his tough 'girlfriend' would ever stoop to such…

Simpery.

Yes; there was no doubt in his mind that Ronnie Anne Santiago was a (literal) Sucker Idolising Massive Pussy, and even if the word had been passe' for years at this point there was none better to describe the Uber Pregnancy-fetishist salivating over his hilariously wide sister. Her antics were so cringeworthy even others of her ilk would tell her to get some self respect.

On the bright side, Lori's face when he'd shown her some footage of exactly what Ronnie Anne had been doing since she'd moved in was priceless.

But regardless of Ronnie Anne's newfound submissive tendencies, there was still one thing that Lincoln could be sure of;

Labour was coming.

And of course, he fully expected that to be Lisa-brand weird.


His expectations were (of course) entirely fulfilled.

Though how they were, that was another matter entirely.

Lisa had the date down to the very minute of when her water would break weeks in advance, and their mother was insistent that everyone who had "gotten us here" attend the event in person; so the entire living family (plus Ronnie) would be there.

Much to their displeasure.

"Is that really her?" Lori whispered to Lincoln in horror at the even greater wobbling blob Lisa had grown into. "I literally can't see anything but blubber."

Lori's assessment was only slightly off. Lisa's body was now little more than what appeared to be a central firm bubble with set of bra and underpants stretched over, and a set of stick like limbs poking out to remind the viewer that it was theoretically human rather than a giant's zit.

"Are you okay down there?" Leni called in concern, anxiously trying to squeak through the square foot or so clearance the basement offered between its wall and Lisa's body without touching said flesh. "I like; totally can't find your head!"

"This is freaky Dudes," Luna shuddered as the belly pulsed and swayed. "I bet you anything Wynona's Big Brown Beaver ain't got nothin' on-"

"All right girls that's enough," one very done Rita Loud curtly commanded the semi-squashed swarm of siblings. "You all had a part to play in getting Lisa here so you're all going to support her today all right?"

"Yes Mom…" the crowd droned.

Ronnie of course was largely oblivious to the Loud Crowd, too busy almost worshipfully sponging down Lisa's flesh, smoothing out the mats and little beds, and checking the assorted infant associated accoutrements that took up almost all of the remaining space in the basement. Lincoln himself had been the one to largely gather them in preparation in anticipation of the small army to arrive.

After all, as the many faces could attest; Lincoln was about to need all the swaddling blankets, milk bottles and diapers he could find.

Speaking of faces….

"Ah Jesus Christ…." Lynn gagged as the great belly rippled, and two dozen faces made their appearance- each now with more prominent differences that made them recognisably distinct if one were unfortunate enough to have seen them a few times.

"It's… amazing…" Lucy sighed in wonder. "Perhaps we made a mistake in choosing not to carry our children…"

"That's disgusting!" Lola screeched. "How could you do that to yourself!?"

"It's awesome!" Lana countered.

"It's literally going to give me nightmares," Lori shuddered, then turned to Lincoln. "I thought you were exaggerating- what did she do to them!?"

"I would remind you all that my current state has rendered me immobile, not anacusic." Called out from behind her massive stomach. "And while I would gladly expound upon the many advancements and improvements I have made to the subjects-"

The faces suddenly withdrew, and Lisa's stomach became smooth again.

"It's time.

Elder Brother Unit, Miss Santiago- commence Operation Echidna."

Lincoln shuddered as Ronnie squee'd, and Lori looked between the two with disbelief.

Lynn leaned over to the eldest to whisper, "Dude, what the heck happened to Ronnie? She's acting… you know."

"I don't know," Lori sighed. "Apparently she has some kind of pregnancy fetish and now she's Lisa's servant or something. At least that's what Lincoln said; one night Ronnie just came home in a daze and by the next morning she'd moved into the house-"

"HOLY SHIT!" Luna's voice suddenly pulled the two from their theorising. "I know I was bettin' about her Beaver but this is somethin' else!"

And something else it was. Ronnie and Lincoln had removed the tubes that connected Lisa's underwear to the various sanitising machines in the basements, and pulled the specialised underwear from her 'hips' to reveal the full extent of her 'majesty'. Lincoln's expression was one of stone, having witnessed the 'secret' himself all too many times for the trauma to stir him, but Ronnie bore dewy eyes and a drooling visage.

Of course, it was not unclean; Lincoln and later Ronnie's tasks had included cleaning all parts of Lisa; however clean or not, discovering that Lisa's genitals had been expanded to fit her frame by direct exposure would shake anyone's constitution.

"Do not be alarmed!" Lisa called from behind her mass. "I have merely engaged in suitable preparations for the unprecedented multiple deliveries to shortly ensue!"

"Leese, don't take this the wrong way but your pussy's bigger than a doghouse." Luna backed away with most of the family from the quivering orifice. "I mean, I get why but how're you gonna-"

SHLLLRROOO

"Houdini's humerus! What's that!?" Luan gasped as Lisa's naughty parts parted.

"That would be Lisa's cervix." Lori muttered, feeling lightheaded as the full tunnel of her sister's insides revealed themselves, gaping open all the way to the half-shrouded meaty end. "Looks like she's nearly done dilating.

Good for her."

The mother of three then calmly pushed Lucy out of the darkest corner of the room, knelt down, and vomited her breakfast onto the floor.

Four of the remaining nine promptly followed suit where they stood.

"Yep, that's just about what I expected for today." Rita shook her head, then called out to her most pregnant daughter. "Is there anything else we should know about-"

There was a wet slapping noise from inside the cavern.

"… Oh God what now?" Rita sighed.

Lucy calmly pulled her camera from inside her purse and activated the light.

"That other thing you should know about, evidently." If a voice could roll its eyes, it would have been Lisa's at that moment.

"And what exactly would that beee…." Rita's voice trailed off as Lucy shined her Camera light down the pulsing tunnel that was Lisa Loud's birth canal.

Lincoln went pale as Lisa's inners were properly illuminated, revealing the full meaty ridges that had parted, the dilated ring of firm flesh at the end… and the dark hole that lead deeper than Lori noted.

But what Lori hadn't seen, and what they now all could, was a blood-traced hand and arm reaching out from within the darkness. The splayed hand was fumbling around, seemingly searching for something as it tapped against the surface of the Cervix.

There was a stunned silence.

Then a thump as Leni fainted.

"I take it that the subjects have been sighted?" Lisa drolly inquired.

"Subjects!?" Lori grabbed Lucy's camera, and shone it further down the horrifying hole. Sure enough the beam caught a moving mass of seemingly endless limbs and heads, and a pair of disturbingly familiar blue eyes looked back at her. "Lisa what did you do?"

"What did I do?" Lisa's voice dripped with smug satisfaction. "No need for such an accusatory tone, I have merely improved- ah!"

Splat

Within Lisa's birth canal, one of the 'subjects' had found their way through the open cervix, now in the clear light of the beam the family could see the child was less an infant but rather more toddler-sized as it sat up and looked up at the source of the light.

The 'infant' blinked both eyes.

Then smiled and pointed.

"Datahh!" They declared, and similar sounds echoed from deeper within Lisa's womb. Still smiling, the child dropped down to all fours, and started crawling towards the light with an open smile.

"Lisa…." Rita groaned.

"It would appear that my advancement program was successful." Lisa noted.

"Advancement program?"

"Indeed," Lisa affirmed. "You see, most mammals who bear live young expel them in a stage of development where they are capable of basic locomotion and a modicum of self-care. Homo Sapiens, however, do so well before their offspring is capable of anything more than wailing in distress due to the restrictions of the birth canal.

I however," Lisa's voice took on a tone of smug satisfaction. "Am well beyond such petty limitations as 'natural biology', and have not only enhanced my own form for perfect incubation and delivery as my-"

"Mega belly?" Lana guessed.

"Massive fanny?" Luna dully supplied.

"Obvious modifications can attest." Lisa continued with only slight annoyance. "But with the assistance of our Fraternal Unit, I was able to reduce the developmental period of all the Subjects contained within my reproductive system to the point where they can now exit the uterus under their own power!"

Over a dozen pairs of eyes shot to Lincoln, who was too done with life to really care at the silent accusation.

"Look, I just held something like an ultrasound handset-"

"After what she already pulled?" Rita hissed, "think! Lincoln! Think!"

Whatever Lincoln's response might have been, it was cut off as he felt something tug at his shirt in a familiar manner. Looking down he spotted the first 'infant' from within Lisa currently kneeling just inside her opening, their umbilical cord trailing behind them.

The child had brunette hair matted with blood and fluids, but its blue eyes reminded him very much of his own.

It held up its arms, and Lincoln instinctively lifted it up- her as he spotted no dangly parts.

There were no words from him as he stared into her blue eyes, and she looked at him quizzically.

Then she wiggled her hands in some familiar manner, and like Pavlov's dogs Lincoln almost robotically performed the Progeny Pacification Procedure. He immediately regretted it of course thanks to the aforementioned blood and fluids, but that regret was washed away as the child laughed out her first word;

"Dahda!"

Lynn blinked "did she just-"

"Dada?" Came an echo from within Lisa.

Splat.

"Dadadada!"

Splat.

Lucy's light shone the way as a small queue of children formed within Lisa's canal, called by the firstborn's discovery they one by one pushed out of the cervical hole and started crawling towards their paternal progenitor, eager to meet their father face to face for the first time.

At least without their mother's skin in the way anyway.

Click

"Really Luce?"

"This moment must never be forgotten." The gothic woman affirmed.

And so it wouldn't be.

One by one they crawled with a tenacity no child their age should have, and upon reaching the end of the 'tunnel' every one of them demanded the same pickup and 'pacification' that the prior had received- which Lincoln numbly provided, gaining a rapidly growing collection of grubby children hanging from every free inch of him. Before long there was not a spec of him not covered in child or Lisa-related grime, and the elders were gently pried off to be cleaned and tucked into something warm.

It took about an hour for every child to climb out, and there was one straggler who resembled Lori that got frightened and had to be coaxed out, but by the end of the line Lincoln had held, kissed and hugged each of his new children before handing them off to either Ronnie or one of the family to be cleaned and tucked into a rudimentary little bed. And for each one, the resident photographer took a picture of every 'birth' that would be held in a mixture of reverence and disturbance for whichever family member would witness them in the future.

The children in question however were far from the relatively stationary newborns they were expecting, and so each of the sisters were assigned whichever set of progeny seemed to resemble them the most and told to try and keep them from crawling away. Lincoln himself was a tad preoccupied with trying to get the gore of over twenty births off.

To be fair, Ronnie had nearly cleaned him off when the afterbirth suddenly came through with the force of a high-pressure hose- so it took longer than anyone could fairly expect.

But within an hour or so the ordeal was done and for better or worse, the Loud family had been expanded nearly thrice over in the span of a single labour.

Lincoln was clean again, and the rest of the bodily fluids, vomit and tears had been dealt with.

The family's preparations were in place for the kids, and the curious little girls (and odd two boys) were eagerly looking around and babbling whatever parts of the English language Lisa had evidently programmed them with her supposed 'ultrasound'.

There was a weird(er) one who had tentacles coming out of her mouth, but she didn't seem to mean harm and sucked them back in after Leni fainted again- so she was put firmly on the 'deal with later' list.

There was only one major, glaring problem to take care of.

"Uhh, Leese?" Luna ventured, awkwardly scratching the back of her head. "Did ya get something to deflate yourself? 'Cause I gotta say…"

Lisa's body was best described as slightly wilted beachball with atrophied sticks for her limbs poking out now and there, and a comically small head and a giant hole on the opposite side.

"You're not looking too good right now."

"If you are referring to my functionally disabled form, I would have to agree." Lisa gravely replied. "Without intervention, this body would never more than a managed problem in varying degrees.

Fortunately, the moment has been prepared for. Elder Brother Unit?"

Lincoln blinked out of his post-Whatever that was- daze. "Yeah Leese?"

"I believe there is a red button next to the staircase with a thumb scanner attached."

He looked over, and sure enough there was a bright red button with a little rectangular scanner next to it.

"I see it."

"Please use the scanner, and then press the button within ten seconds."

"Um…" something in Lincoln's mind warned him, but the rest of him was too tired of today to care. "Alright."

The man walked past his assorted siblings, parents and singular old friend, and pressed his thumb to the scanner. There was a beep and a green flash that he took as a confirmation of identity, then he firmly pressed the button.

Click.

"Lisa, what did I just switch on?" Lincoln's age old 'nonsense sense' tingled at the ominous sound.

A panel in the ceiling opened up, revealing a long cylindrical object attached to a mechanical arm.

"Leese?"

"Calm yourself Elder Brother Unit, it is merely my… 'reset button' as it were." Lisa's voice called out.

The mechanical arm swung down, and the light of the basement windows shone upon the unmistakable profile of a twelve gauge shotgun as the barrel pointed down towards where Lisa's unseen head was.

"Lisa!?"

"Lisa Marie Loud- why do you have a Shotgun in my house!?" Rita's eyes bulged. "And why is it pointing at you!?"

"My finances were stretched short after purchasing the house in which the subject's conception occurred, so an economical solution was required." Lisa calmly 'explained'. "My clone body will activate shortly, see you ups-"

BANG

The weapon discharged, leaving the family with ringing ears, that cleared to crying children scared by the sound.

Lincoln blinked, then slowly turned to see Leni having fainted once more, Luna holding two similarly brunette heads close to her body and his mother staring with pale lips. He followed her line of sight with dread and sure enough the square foot of clearance that Lisa's slightly deflated body offered to let someone through to the other side of the room, now allowed him to see that the walls of the other side was splattered with a mix of blood, bone and brain.

"… I think we should go upstairs."


It took an hour to calm the kids, but the ordeal of being born had tired them so the newly made nurseries upstairs were put to good use easily enough.

It was two before anyone else was able to bring themselves to talk in anything but curt, terse sentences.

It was three before Leni would wake up without immediately fainting again.

It was half an hour after that, that one Lisa Loud walked through the back door and Leni fainted once again.

"Lisa!?" Rita gasped at the sight of her second youngest. "W-W- HOW?"

How indeed.

The scientist seemed to have completely reversed the ordeal of motherhood, appearing as slim as she had before her 'Super Sybian' had claimed her victims- and in turn they'd forced her to bear the consequences. Her hair was slightly damp, but already reforming into her usual mess of a mop and her skin was slightly flushed with the tell-tale sign of a fresh shower.

She also bore a fresh mug of coffee in her hand clearly emblazoned with the words; "World's Best Mom" , that she supped from before speaking.

"Good day assorted familial units, I am pleased to see that-"

"Lisa." Rita Loud calmly stood up, grabbed her daughter by the lapels of her freshly pressed labcoat and then shoved her against the wall with enough force to rattle the windows. "WE SAW YOU DIE!"

Lisa noted the spillage from her coffee mug with mild annoyance. "Indeed, however I did establish that I had a clone body prepared beforehand."

"Clone body…" Rita looked over her daughter. "… That's what this is?"

"Indeed," Lisa nodded, then attempted to take another sip of her coffee, only to discover that the jug was sadly empty. "I envisioned a possibility that my own body would be irretrievably damaged by my 'Plan B' as it were, so I created a backup in case of that eventuality."

"Okay…" Rita breathed. "And you needed to Shotgun yourself in the face because why!?"

"My preparations indicated that in order to transfer my consciousness fully, the previous body would need to be terminated to avoid a 'concurrent residency' of sorts." Lisa uncharacteristically shuddered. "Living in two bodies at once currently induces a strong nauseating effect-"

Rita held up a hand to silence her, stood back, and breathed out. "Stop. Just stop for a moment.

You're all right? You're you, not a copy or a clone- our Lisa in a new body you made in your bunker?"

Lisa thought for a moment. "Yes, my computer indicated the full construction and transfer was complete without issues."

"Good, good." Rita nodded to herself. "We were all worried for a minute there."

They all really were.

Lincoln didn't think anyone had really thought that Lisa would have simply killed herself after all the efforts she'd gone through. But for those dreadful past few hours, it had sure felt like she'd either made a mistake she couldn't take back and had simply left them to pick up the pieces.

It had hurt.

CRACK

But probably a bit less than how much Lisa's jaw did when their mother dislocated it.