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Wednesday, February 6, 2008

11:06:26 p.m.

Message from: Impala67

Message to: SamIAm

Subject: Hey

Hey I noticed your profile yesterday. You like AC/DC too? Great band. I just moved into the Austin, Texas area and I'm looking for a good time. I'm a single 29-year-old dude. I like muscle cars and all-American apple pie. Hit me up if you want. If not, that's cool.


Friday, February 8, 2008

5:55:26 p.m.

Message from: SamIAm

Message to: Impala67

Subject: [Re] Hey

Hello, Impala67. Sorry for the late reply. My name is Sam. It's nice to meet you. I like your car. 67 Impala, right? Do you want to chat?


Friday, February 8, 2008

5:58:03 p.m.

Impala67 has entered the chat.

SamIAm has entered the chat.

Impala67: [5:58:23] hey nice profile pick. Like the shirt. AC/DC is the shit

SamIAm: [5:59:01] Thanks. You, too.

Impala67: [6:00:06] Aside from being sexy, what do u do for a living?

SamIAm: [6:00:53] Is that meant to be clever?

Impala67: [6:01:23] wat? Not good enough 4 u? did I come on too strong?

Impala67: [6:02:57] u still there?

SamIAm: [6:03:15] Yeah, sorry. I'm a bit busy rn

Impala67: With what? Did I catch you at a bad time or something? Thought you wanted to chat man…

SamIAm: [6:04:58] Sorry. You're right.

Impala67: [6:05:52] so how long have you lived in the Austin area? Its freezing down here. Not that Im bitching or anything

SamIAm: [6:08:23] For a while. You're not used to the cold?

Impala67: [6:09:17] Nah im not from Texas

SamIAm: [6:10:45] Where are you from?

Impala67: [6:11:25] everywhere honestly. I travel around a lot

SamIAm: [6:11:58] For work or play? :)

Impala67: [6:12:29] for work mostly

SamIAm: [6:13:50] What do you do?

Impala67: [6:15:44] just about everything. Mechanic work sometimes. Whatever pays the bills. Where the job is I go u know?

SamIAm: [6:16:53] Yeah.

Impala67: [6:17:47] What do u do for work

SamIAm: [6:18:15] I fix computers, mostly.

Impala67: [6:19:04] Cool.

SamIAm: [6:23:08] Are you still there?

Impala67: [6:24:41] Yeah. Just making dinner. I usually get takeout, but I thought id stay in tonight

SamIAm: [6:25:58] Do you want to hear a pickup line?

Impala67: [6:26:35] U got a better one than mine?

SamIAm: [6:27:48] Sure.

Impala67: [6:28:52] Lay it on me

SamIAm: [6:29:36] Hey, my name's Microsoft.

Impala67: [6:30:17] okay…?

SamIAm: [6:31:08] No, you're supposed to say, "Hi, Microsoft."

Impala67: [6:32:44] hey Microsoft

SamIAm: [6:33:45] Can I crash at your place tonight?

Impala67: [6:34:09] …

SamIAm: [6:35:53] What?

Impala67: [6:36:31] I dont get it

SamIAm: [6:37:00] Crash. Meaning, computer crash.

Impala67: [6:38:09] huh

SamIAm: [6:39:33] Huh? What do you mean, huh?

Impala67: [6:40:17] Still dont get it.

SamIAm: [6:41:48] A computer crash is when the operating system or computer application stops functioning properly. It usually occurs when the operating system data has become corrupted.

Impala67: [6:42:21] Ok Mr. Wizard. You dont have to geek out on me

SamIAm: [6:42:59] I was just trying to explain it.

Impala67: [6:43:45] to be honest, Im not the best with computers

SamIAm: [6:44:16] They why do you have one?

Impala67: [6:45:49] to talk to pp online. Gets lonely sometimes

SamIAm: [6:46:32] Yeah.

Impala67: [6:47:39] Do u wanna hear a better pick up line?

SamIAm: [6:48:16] Sure.

Impala67: [6:49:57] Youve got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

SamIAm: [6:50:19] Jesus.

Impala67: [6:51:26] hahahaha like it?

SamIAm: [6:52:09] You come up with that yourself?

Impala67: [6:53:01] No. Googled it.

SamIAm: [6:53:51] Of course.

Impala67: [6:54:30] u don't look like somebody who works on computers.

SamIAm: [6:54:56] wdym?

Impala67: [6:55:33] wat?

SamIAm: [6:56:56] What do you mean?

Impala67: [6:57:39] Oh. You just don't look like a total geek thats all.

SamIAm: [6:58:34] I'll take that as a compliment.

Impala67: [6:59:17] ur kind of like batman huh

SamIAm: [7:00:19] What do you mean?

Impala67: [7:01:00] Youre a different person at night.

SamIAm: [7:03:27] haha I think you're confusing Batman with Superman. I'll take that as a compliment. And, yes, I'm more of a night owl. You?

Impala67: [7:05:22] No Im pretty sure its batman. Yeah I like the nighttime better too

Imapala67: [7:06:39] That bar that youre standing in front of in your profile pic it looks cool

SamIAm: [7:07:41] It is.

Impala67: [7:08:15] Whats it called?

SamIAm: [7:10:24] The Black Rose.

Impala67: [7:11:13] Might wanna go there someday

SamIAm: [7:12:36] Yeah.

Impala67: [7:13:18] Maybe with u

Impala67: [7:17:33] Shit did I come on too strong? U there?

SamIAm: [7:18:08] Sorry, again. Like I said, I'm busy. Can we chat later?

Impala67: [7:19:02] When?

SamIAm: [7:20:45] Perhaps tomorrow.

Impala67: [7:21:26] that sounds good. What time?

SamIAm: [7:22:58] 11

Impala67: [7:23:55] morning or nite?

SamIAm: [7:24:36] Night

Impala67: [7:25:36] k

SamIAm: [7:26:14] Ok

Impala67: [7:27:18] Signing off now.

SamIAm: [7:28:01] Okay.

Impala67: [7:29:56] How do I sign out?

SamIAm: [7:30:55] Press the little red button at the bottom of the chat bar. It's labeled "exit."

Impala67: [7:32:16] thx

SamIAm: [7:32:57] No problem.

Impala67 has left the chat.

SamIAm has left the chat.


Saturday, February 9, 2008

11:07:22 p.m.

SamIAm has entered the chat

Impala67 has entered the chat

Impala67: [11:07:35] srry im late. Lost track of time

SamIAm: [11:08:08] What are you doing?

Impala67: [11:08:39] working a case

SamIAm: [11:09:14] What do you mean?

Impala67: [11:10:16] Srry, I mean working on some stuff for my job. My boss is a bitch u know

SamIAm: [11:11:02] Yeah. I can understand that. Do you want to talk about it?

Impala67: [11:11:37] honestly no. just wanna drink

SamIAm: [11:12:00] What's your favorite?

Impala67: [11:12:12] wat?

SamIAm: [11:12:31] Drink.

Impala67: [11:13:20] I dont know. I like just about anything honestly. U?

SamIAm: [11:13:45] Mimosa.

Impala67: [11:14:01] the chick drink?

SamIAm: [11:14:38] It's not bad. That or a Bloody Mary.

Impala67: [11:15:07] gross

SamIAm: [11:15:34] It's not that bad.

Impala67: [11:16:14] Whats ur favorite food?

SamIAm: [11:17:00] Honestly?

Impala67: [11:17:31] No lie to me.

SamIAm: [11:18:02] I don't really have one anymore.

Impala67: [11:18:44] anymore?

SamIAm: [11:21:56] I used to love pasta and salad. I worked for a little Italian restaurant in my hometown. The owner was a gracious man, even though I never understood why. I didn't have much money, but he'd let me eat whatever was left over after my shift was finished.

Impala67: [11:22:59] salad? Dude thats gross as hell

SamIAm: [11:23:18] It's not if that's all you have to eat.

Impala67: [11:23:49] you aint wrong

SamIAm: [11:26:14] Anyway, I'd bring the leftovers home to my little sister. I can still remember her face, how she'd brighten up when I came through the door, how she'd climb all over me to get to the basket of breadsticks I'd hide behind my back.

Impala67: [11:27:57] u talk like shes dead

SamIAm: [11:30:00] She is.

Impala67: [11:30:10] shit srry

SamIAm: [11:31:07] I don't want to talk about that.

Impala67: [11:34:09] Hey man, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to go there. If you want to leave the chat it's fine.

SamIAm: [11:35:14] No, it's okay. It was a long time ago. Things happen.

Impala67: [11:35:40] yeah they do.

SamIAm: [11:37:52] What was your youth like?

Impala67: [11:38:46] thats a random question

SamIAm: [11:39:14] Too bold?

Impala67: [11:40:30] no. I grew up on the road. Just me and my dad. My mom, she died when I was a kid.

SamIAm: [11:41:36] I'm so sorry.

Impala67: [11:43:52] yeah, well. That's life rite? It was just me and my dad. He was an x-marine. Real tough. Taught me a lot. Made me the man I am today.

SamIAm: [11:45:35] Is he still with us?

Impala67: [11:46:26] Alive? Nah. He died on the job.

SamIAm: [11:47:32] I'm sorry.

Impala67: [11:49:18] it doesnt bother me anymore. Ive grieved or whatever. Just time to move on. Got a life to live u know?

SamIAm: [11:51:40] Yes, I can understand that.

Impala67: [11:54:16] What are u wearing?

SamIAm: [11:55:23] We're going there, are we?

Impala67: [11:56:32] Isnt that the point of this website?

SamIAm: [11:57:19] I'd beg to differ.

Impala67: [11:58:59] If I tell you a joke, will you tell me what ur wearing?

SamIAm: [11:59:16] Deal.

Impala67: [12:01:48] What do u call a gay police dog?

SamIAm: [12:02:18] What?

Impala67: [12:03:00] A gaynine.

SamIAm: [12:03:56] That's stupid. lol

Impala67: [12:04:42] well u cant say I didnt try

SamIAm: [12:05:18] Google again?

Impala67: [12:07:07] Nah I thought of that myself. Now u gonna tell me what youre wearing?

SamIAm: [12:08:14] Fine. Socks.

Impala67: [12:09:55] Okay…just socks? because that's kind of kinky Sammy.

SamIAm: [12:10:16] Sam.

Impala67: [12:10:59] wat?

SamIAm: [12:11:43] The name's Sam, not Sammy.

Impala67: [12:12:05] srry, SAM.

SamIAm: [12:16:25] I'm wearing blue jeans. The jeans are worn, faded. Button down shirt. Light blue.

Impala67: [12:16:51] any cologne?

SamIAm: [12:17:36] No, but I'm wearing deodorant.

Impala67: [12:18:31] good

SamIAm: [12:19:16] You want to know what I'm doing right now?

Impala67: [12:20:53] if its sexy yeah. If its boring no

SamIAm: [12:24:25] I'm lying on my stomach on my bed typing this. There's a man chained to the bedframe. He's sweating profusely; rivulets of blood are gradually dripping from the gnash on the side of his throat. I can hear his heart throbbing in my eardrums. He's staring at me with these terribly frightened eyes. He's afraid I'll finish the job. Should I?

Impala67: [12:27:06] Very funny.

SamIAm: [12:28:05] You think I'm joking?

Impala67: [12:28:50] ur hilarious. I didnt know u were a sadist

SamIAm: [12:29:33] I'm not. Just a very hungry being.

Impala67: [12:30:54] lol. this stuff turn u on? The whole fantasy thing?

SamIAm: [12:32:00] Fantasy thing…?

Impala67: [12:32:22] Yeah.

SamIAm: [12:34:02] If only this were a fantasy, life would be much more tolerable.

Impala67: [12:36:46] lol I once met a chick who wanted me to dress like a dog so she could walk me around her living room. U believe that?

SamIAm: [12:37:44] It's plausible.

Impala67: [12:29:16] U wanna meet up.

SamIAm: [12:31:01] Tonight?

Impala67: [12:31:23] yea why not?

SamIAm: [12:32:35] No. Didn't I tell you? I'm busy.

Impala67: [12:34:16] lol u don't scare me

SamIAm: [12:35:36] I should. I really should.

Impala67: [12:38:19] yeah, whatever. I'll come over, bring some beers. We can watch a movie or something. U like movies?

SamIAm: [12:40:39] I have to get going.

Impala67: [12:41:21] k…was it something I said?

SamIAm: [12:41:59] No. Don't worry about it. Talk to you tomorrow?

Impala67: [12:42:52] u sure u won't be too "busy"?

SamIAm: [12:43:16] Yes, I'm sure.

Impala67: [12:45:13] ok bye

SamIAm: [12:46:07] Talk to you soon. Goodbye.

Impala67 has left the chat.

SamIAm has left the chat.


Sunday, February 10, 2008

9:06:26 a.m.

Message from: Impala67

Message to: SamIAm

Subject: Time?

Hey Sam. Enjoying the weather? That storm was awful last night. I don't think I can even get out in all this snow. I hate being stuck inside. I've never been used to that shit. What time did you want to chat? Forgot to ask you last night.


Sunday, February 10, 2008

10:17:35 p.m.

Message from: SamIAm

Message to: Impala67

Subject: [re] Time?

Good evening, Impala67. Or, perhaps more accurately, good night. I apologize for not answering sooner. I slept and forgot to check my messages. Yes, the snow is egregious, isn't it? I can't believe it has started up again. Can we chat? I see that you're currently logged in…


Sunday, February 10, 2008

10:20:02 p.m.

Impala67 has entered the chat

SamIAm has entered the chat

Impala67: [10:20:32] hey

SamIAm: [10:20:55] Hello.

Impala67: [10:21:32] Sleep well?

SamIAm: [10:22:52] Yes, I did. Are you enjoying the snow?

Impala67: [10:23:09] no

SamIAm: [10:23:46] I think it's beautiful.

Impala67: [10:24:25] Well I dont. I couldnt go out today.

SamIAm: [10:25:57] Where do you live?

Impala67: [10:27:33] thats a little straight forward, dont you think?

SamIAm: [10:29:02] What area, at least. I want to meet you.

Impala67: [10:30:00] want to meet me why?

SamIAm: [10:30:59] Because you're impossibly attractive. You are the most handsome man I've ever seen.

Impala67: [10:31:30] go on man dont stop there

SamIAm: [10:32:19] I think you may be the one.

Impala67: [10:33:46] damn tell me how u really feel

SamIAm: [10:34:20] That is how I really feel.

Impala67: [10:35:50] haha I know dude. Its a figure of speech. What do u mean by the one anyway?

SamIAm: [10:36:38] I don't know. Just thinking.

Impala67: [10:38:38] u didnt want to meet w/me last night. Whats up? What changed ur mind?

SamIAm: [10:39:16] I'm lonely.

Impala67: [10:40:42] arent we all?

SamIAm: [10:42:44] My loneliness is different than yours, I'm afraid.

Impala67: [10:43:26] how so?

SamIAm: [10:45:09] It's like a continuous stream, always flowing, never stopping. Have you ever taken mushrooms?

Impala67: [10:45:58] the hell?

SamIAm: [10:46:25] Mushrooms.

Impala67: [10:47:37] yeah man I know what mushrooms are. No, I havent. Why?

SamIAm: [10:50:49] It's a little bit like that. This loneliness. It's like being high. Days go by and nothing changes. It's the snake eating his own tail. I'm always lost in the fog.

Impala67: [10:52:07] ok Shakespeare

SamIAm: [10:52:54] I try, I try.

Impala67: [10:54:39] I live in a motel, if that answers ur question.

SamIAm: [10:55:07] A motel? Why?

Impala67: [10:56:55] Like I said, Im always traveling.

SamIAm: [10:57:49] Do you enjoy always traveling?

Impala67: [10:59:35] Ive never had anything different. I wouldnt know how to stop even if I tried.

SamIAm: [11:01:07] So, what motel? I'll bring over some beer, like you said last night. I do like movies. Action movies, usually. I have I Am Legend. Have you watched that one?

Impala67: [11:03:46] haha Im not giving u my motel address

SamIAm: [11:05:23] Why not? :(

Impala67: [11:06:03] Sam dont get me wrong, I like you. But you could be some psycho.

SamIAm: [11:08:05] What makes you say that?

Impala67: [11:09:49] what happened to the guy last night?

SamIAm: [11:10:55] I was just teasing you. I don't have anyone chained to my bed.

Impala67: [11:12:17] how would I know? you could be coming to kill me…

SamIAm: [11:14:11] That's not funny. You know I was teasing.

Impala67: [11:15:05] what about ur place? Where do u live?

SamIAm: [11:16:41] It's a townhouse in downtown Austin. It's spacious. Do you…?

Impala67: [11:19:16] Would u rather me come there instead?

SamIAm: [11:20:12] In the snow, I don't think you could drive.

Impala67: [11:22:36] if I couldnt drive there then how were u planning on coming here? Walking?

SamIAm: [11:24:15] I could walk.

Impala67: [11:25:41] Not how bad it is outside no. thats crazy.

SamIAm: [11:27:00] I don't mind the cold. Or the distance.

Impala67: [11:28:14] u really wanna see me that bad huh?

SamIAm: [11:29:36] Yes.

Impala67: [11:32:46] ill tell you wat man if u want to we can meet at ur place lets say Tuesday night. That way the snow has thawed a bit. Deal?

SamIAm: [11:33:36] Deal.

SamIAm: [11:37:57] Are you still there?

Impala67: [11:39:36] Yeah. Im here.

SamIAm: [11:40:01] Tell me a joke.

Impala67: [11:40:56] A joke. Ok lets see.

SamIAm: [11:43:19] I'm waiting…

Impala67: [11:43:55] patience, Sammy

SamIAm: [11:44:28] It's Sam.

Impala67: [11:45:06] Ok, SAM.

SamIAm: [11:46:09] Thank you.

Impala67: [11:46:30] You're welcome.

Impala67: [11:48:10] What does a priest and Christmas tree have in common?

SamIAm: [11:48:43] What?

Impala67: [11:49:17] Both of their balls are useless.

SamIAm: [11:51:15] That's a good one. I got one.

Impala67: [11:52:36] hit me

SamIAm: [11:53:49] What does the ice cube say to the water glass?

Impala67: [11:54:01] wat

SamIAm: [11:55:11] I was water before it got cool.

Impala67: [11:55:50] lame!

SamIAm: [11:56:38] Oh, come on. It wasn't that bad.

Impala67: [11:58:12] youre a nerd

SamIAm: [11:59:06] I know. At least I am proud enough to acknowledge it.

Impala67: [12:01:20] tell me something

SamIAm: [12:01:01] About what?

Impala67: [12:02:50] Do u live w/anyone? Have any family members?

SamIAm: [12:03:58] Yeah, I suppose I do.

Impala67: [12:04:43] what are they like?

SamIAm: [12:07:41] They are more like adoptive siblings more than anything. We live together, take care of each other. They can be annoying at times. Demanding, I suppose. Other times, they are great to be around. Depends on my mood.

Impala67: [12:10:13] like roommates? Or more like a commune?

SamIAm: [12:11:43] I guess you could say that. It's just a way to survive. Austin is a big city, rent is expensive.

Impala67: [12:12:55] its kinda dangerous too

SamIAm: [12:13:35] What do you mean?

Impala67: [12:16:00] Did u see all those pp missing? Men especially. Bodies found in the river…drained of blood. More reported missing every day

SamIAm: [12:17:03] Yeah, I have. The flyers are all over the city. Why are you mentioning this?

Impala67: [12:18:26] just weird I guess

SamIAm: [12:20:09] Does that scare you? I bet, traveling around like you do, you've come across plenty of places with missing people. It's not a rarity.

Impala67: [12:22:16] yeah well its just strange

SamIAm: [12:23:02] I guess so.

SamIAm: [12:25:58] Are you still there?

SamIAm: [12:28:00] Hello?

Impala67: [12:31:16] yeah srry

SamIAm: [12:31:31] What happened?

Impala67: [12:32:05] Just busy.

SamIAm: [12:32:55] This late?

Impala67: [12:33:57] No rest for the wicked. ;)

SamIAm: [12:34:58] Funny.

Impala67: [12:35:43] How old are u btw?

SamIAm: [12:36:58] 25

Impala67: [12:37:31] ah ur a bb dude

SamIAm: [12:38:17] I'm mature for my age.

Impala67: [12:39:06] u make me feel like a cougar

SamIAm: [12:40:14] Very amusing.

Impala67: [12:41:06] or a cradle robber

SamIAm: [12:41:45] So funny I forgot to laugh.

Impala67: [12:42:56] I know I try.

SamIAm: [12:43:36] I forgot to ask, what's your name?

Impala67: [12:45:01] Dean.

SamIAm: [12:46:36] Dean. I like it.

Impala67: [12:47:01] Well thanks.

SamIAm: [12:48:59] My address is 2654 West Aspen. It's right beside the Black Rose.

Impala67: [12:49:20] Thank u

SamIAm: [12:50:46] Will I see you Tuesday?

Impala67: [12:52:03] yeah what time?

SamIAm: [12:53:34] Night.

Impala67: [12:54:58] anytime during the night…kinky

SamIAm: [12:55:29] Yes.

Impala67: [12:56:30] Ok ill see you then

SamIAm: [12:57:08] Bye, Dean.

Impala67: [12:57:33] bye sam

Impala67 has left the chat.

SamIAm has left the chat.