Despite Fridays being, historically the busiest of her week, Minerva sailed through it with barely a thought. She spent most of her meeting chewing on her thumb nail and lunch was almost a disaster when she overfilled her goblet and almost dropped her salad on her lap but after the students were dismissed for the day and the marking sorted and put in a pile for Sunday evening, Minerva paced her living room.
"Min," Albus said gently. "Do something you enjoy."
"What do I enjoy, Albus? Drinking?" Albus snorted. "Chess, Quidditch? She hates quidditch and honestly, she's rubbish at chess. I no longer know what I enjoy, Albus, that is the problem."
"Minerva," Albus chuckled. "Calm down. Hermione wants to spend time with you. Surely there's something interesting that you might have that she could join in on? She doesn't have to have an interest in what it is, to begin with, you must introduce her to it. Perhaps something will grow from it."
"She took me to a musical I mentioned last October, Albus. How do I compete with that?" She was almost shouting by the end and she groaned into her hands.
"Minerva, breathe. Take a deep breath. She would be perfectly content to go to your favourite restaurant, or you could find a show for her? It is not a competition."
"If it is this hard," Severus drawled. "Why are you bothering?"
Albus made a noise but the question made Minerva pause. She knew the answer before he'd even finished speaking and she turned to them both and looked at them in turn.
"Because I want to," she whispered. The fear in her chest tightened, so she said it again, louder. "Because I want to. I may not know what I'm doing, but she is," she frowned. "Dare I say, fun to be with. I have laughed more in her presence than I ever did with either of you," she apologised with a look. "I confess I do not understand what she sees in me but it is -" She trailed off, but Severus fixed her with a stare.
"Nice," Severus muttered. "To have someone's complete attention."
Minerva dropped her hands by her sides and smiled.
"Yes," she whispered. "Exactly."
"Then get on with it, woman," Severus said simply. "I'm sure, had someone offered to spend their life with me, I would have quite happily sat in silence with them. Even if it was the resident swot."
Albus smirked at her as her eyes widened. As a rule, Severus tended to provide rather a dark commentary after a boring meeting or disciplinary moment; this was the most he'd spoken since their portraits were hung but in doing so, he had given her an idea.
"Thank you, gentlemen," she smiled. She left them with a wave and set off into the castle. She wandered slowly up to the Tower and was just wondering how to get Hermione's attention without anyone realising when she almost bumped into someone.
"Whoa," Ginny Weasley said as she skipped out of her way. "Sorry Professor. Everything alright?"
"Um," Minerva started. "Yes."
They stood awkwardly for a little while before Ginny smiled at her.
"Would you like me to get Hermione for you?"
Minerva sighed.
"Would you? I would be grateful."
"Absolutely," she grinned. "She's been a bear all week," she chuckled. "I'm glad you decided to take the chance."
She left Minerva standing in the middle of the corridor. Minerva was consumed with her thoughts. Hermione had wanted her to reach out. And she hadn't reached out herself, nor had she suggested it was Minerva's turn! How was she supposed to know she was supposed to reach out?
She was working herself right up as the portrait opened and Hermione Granger stepped out with a smile.
"Hey," she whispered as she came alongside her. "Everything okay?"
"You should have told me," Minerva muttered as she nodded back down the corridor.
"Told you what?" Hermione blinked.
"That you were going to wait for me to reach out."
Hermione turned and looked back along the corridor with a frown.
"If I had told you," she said softly as she fell into step beside Minerva. "You may not have done so of your own accord. It's fine. It's equally fine if you're here to let me down easily. I'll be sad, but it's okay if that's your choice. My feelings for you won't change."
"I wondered if you were free tomorrow, actually?"
"I am," Hermione smiled.
"And tonight?"
"Free as a bird."
"Would you join me for dinner tonight, in my rooms? I'm afraid, I don't -"
Hermione placed her fingers on Minerva's lips.
"We could have beans on toast at a bus stop and I'd still enjoy the time I get with you," she chuckled at Minerva's confused look. "Just, whatever you want to do, Min, I would be honoured to spend that time with you."
"Then perhaps you might pack a small overnight bag? I have a spare room, only tomorrow we will need to be up quite early."
"Ooh," she grinned. "That sounds exciting."
"I hope so," Minerva frowned. "I mean, I'm not one to do this sort of thing. Well, if you should prefer, we can -"
"Minerva," Hermione groaned quietly. "I dunno if you know this but -"
A group of students walked past and Hermione smiled at them and glanced around. She pulled Minerva into the old Arithmancy classroom and closed the door.
"Right," Hermione smiled. "Let me tell you again. I'm in love with you." Minerva blushed. "And I'm going to say it until it becomes easier for you to hear unless you tell me that you'd like me to stop. And if there's something you wish to do, and you'd like me to accompany you, then I will move heaven and earth to be there. Alright?"
Minerva chuckled and hid her face in her hands.
"Hermione," she muttered as she looked up. "I'm not good at this, I don't -"
"You," Hermione smiled gently. She took Minerva's hands in her own and looked at her properly. "Are doing just fine."
They stared at each other for a while before Hermione reached forward and stroked her finger along Minerva's cheek.
"Would it be helpful to speak your fears?"
"I spent yesterday evening talking to Filius." It suddenly occurred to her that in doing so she had inadvertently not asked for Hermione's permission to reveal anything. "Hermione, I'm sorry, I -"
"That doesn't matter," she waved off the concern. "Genuinely. He is your friend and a good man. My friend knows." She blushed. "Ok friends. Harry knows too."
"What do they think?" Minerva asked genuinely.
"Oh," Hermione suddenly realised where they were. "You wanna stay here or should I run upstairs for my bag and meet you at yours?"
Minerva blushed again.
"Yes, let's do that. I don't have anything planned for dinner, Hermione, I can't -"
Two strong arms wrapped around her and she reciprocated without thought. Hermione held her tightly and after a few moments, Minerva let go of a deep breath and felt it warm her nose on Hermione's neck.
"Hermione," she whispered. "It frightens me how much I enjoy this."
She felt a soft sigh against her cheek and the arms around her tightened.
"You're allowed to enjoy this," Hermione said gently. "And you're allowed to not know how you feel. And be uncomfortable with other parts of it. You are," she said again. "I made a few assumptions about you before entering into this and in hindsight, I perhaps was wrong for doing so."
"Let's go back to mine and chat for a while," Minerva smiled. "I'll wait while you get your bag if you like?"
"'kay."
After retrieving her bag from the dormitory, she walked beside Minerva back to her rooms where Minerva sighed as the door closed.
"Long day?" Hermione asked.
Minerva didn't even think.
"If the second years could perhaps find a single brain cell between them, it may have been easier."
Hermione's melodious laughter rang out through her rooms and Minerva blushed at the candour.
"Min," she said, still chuckling. "I won't ever tell anyone anything you say to me, okay? Don't look so worried." Minerva nodded and tried not to look relieved. "Hey," Hermione muttered. She held Minerva's arms. "I won't ever jeopardise your position as teacher or Headmistress, alright?"
"I know," she smiled, finally feeling a little of her equilibrium return. "Honestly, I was more shocked at myself for saying it so freely, than the thought of telling you, specifically."
Hermione smiled and Minerva lost most of her breath as she leaned forward on her tiptoes and kissed Minerva's forehead. A deep feeling of something unfurled in her stomach and she stepped back with a small smile.
"I'll show you to your room."
It wasn't an exciting spare room. Three people had slept in it since she was given it, and two of them had been other teachers after a long night but it would do for the night.
"I'm afraid it's not much, but -"
"It's fine," she smiled. "Anywhere is better than a tent."
Minerva baulked for a moment and rallied.
"Right. Well. Dinner?"
"Sure," Hermione shrugged. "Do you usually eat this early?"
Minerva paused and glanced at her watch and saw how early it was and groaned into her hands again.
"I'm -"
Hermione stopped her and wrapped her up in her arms again.
"Relax," she chuckled. "There's nothing to be worried about, alright? Please don't let me intrude if you have things to do, otherwise, we left two questions unanswered. I can swing back to them later, or -?"
"I don't even recall what they were," Minerva muttered.
"You asked me what the other two think of me being in love with you." Minerva, once again, cursed her infernally pale skin as she blushed. "And," Hermione frowned. "Oh!" She said suddenly. "I wanted to apologise for the assumptions I made about you."
"Assumptions?"
"Well, for one. I never asked you whether you're even into women? And that should have been the first one."
"Oh," Minerva sighed. "No, that's," she suddenly realised what she was doing." I mean -"
Hermione smiled supportively and Minerva groaned. Again.
"You are sending me utterly senseless. I cannot even have a decent conversation with you."
Hermione laughed and sat beside her on the bed.
"I'm still me, you know," she said softly, taking Minerva's hand.
"And yet you are not."
Hermione shrugged and looked up at her so openly that Minerva sat down beside her and it was her, this time, that altered how their hands sat together. She catalogued the few scars on Hermione's hand as it settled into hers and she took a deep breath.
"I am not a nun," she said, remembering thinking the same while she had been talking to Filius. "But I have not had many serious relationships, as I already said." Hermione nodded. "And yes, some of them have been with women."
"Do you have a preference?"
"I do not know," she chuckled, her face hot.
"Well look, I much prefer women. And I figure magic allows us to have whatever they have anyway, right, so -"
"Hermione!" Minerva almost squealed. She was sure she'd be beet-red at this point.
"Just stating facts," Hermione sing-songed, nudging Minerva as she laughed. Minerva was still chuckling as Hermione settled against her. "Harry thought I was mental when I first told him until I started talking about you and then he saw. Ginny has been pushing me just to tell you for most of the last year," she laughed. "Apparently I mope."
Minerva chuckled.
"Filius was likewise very supportive."
"I'm glad you have someone to talk to about this," she said gently. "Especially Filius. He is a good man."
"One of the best I have known," Minerva agreed.
"So. You're into women enough, I'm into women only, our friends know we're exploring these options together and you," she smiled as she cupped Minerva's cheek. "Are glorious. And whatever you have chosen for us to experience together is going to be glorious," Hermione dropped her voice to a whisper as she continued. "Because it is with you."
Before Minerva could speak, Hermione used her hand on Minerva's cheek to anchor her still and she leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss on the corner of her mouth. Her whole body tingled as Hermione pulled away and she clenched her fists to avoid doing anything stupid.
"I hope that was okay," she whispered.
Minerva couldn't speak but she nodded.
"It wasn't, was it?"
"I don't know," she said. Her voice sounded so hollow.
"Tell me why you fear this?"
"Oh, Hermione," she breathed. "We do not have the time to list my fears."
"Tell me the most important one then? It isn't because you're a woman and I am a woman. It isn't that I am a student."
"But you were," Minerva said, shocking herself as she almost shouted. She adjusted her tone and tried not to shout again. "You were. Not so long ago. And it's more than a little jarring to think of myself, in particular, dating a student."
"We took care of that," Hermione said kindly. "I am no longer a student."
"And yet, you are," Minerva stood, just to get some breathing room. "You wear a uniform, you attend classes. I do not know how to separate that from what I -"
Hermione's head perked up and Minerva knew that there would be no point not finishing her sentence.
"I -" Hermione said softly.
"Want," Minerva whispered. "What I want."
"So you do -"
"Yes," Minerva snapped. "And I shouldn't. I shouldn't want this. I shouldn't -"
"Whoa," Hermione said, stopping her before she got too worked up. "Slow down. It's alright."
Minerva breathed heavily against Hermione's shoulder and burst into tears when she could no longer fight it. The kiss on her lips had made her realise, all at once, that she wanted whatever Hermione was offering. She wanted to come home in the evening, to a woman who looked at her like Hermione did. She wanted to unload her day onto those strong shoulders and listen as Hermione told her about hers.
Actually, she didn't want a woman that looked at her like Hermione did. She wanted Hermione.
"Merlin, I want it so much," she cried. She clung to Hermione while she cried and Hermione rocked them gently as she did. She offered no platitudes or false promises. Only love.
Minerva could see that now.
"Min?" Hermione said gently as she got her breathing back under control. "I'm leaving school. Effective immediately. I'm going to go and get an interim job somewhere, outside the school maybe I'll go back to what I was doing after the war, but I am leaving. And when the year ends, I'm going to go to University and get some qualifications."
Minerva stepped back and blinked at her. The resoluteness of her face was one she knew that she could never argue with but she frowned, nevertheless.
"But you," she shrugged. "You said you wanted to stay until the end?"
"I did, only so I could be next to you. As much as possible. But I don't ever want to hurt you. I don't want that to be the worst thing you have to contend with. I want you to be happy, not worried, and looking over your shoulder. That's no way to live."
"I don't want you to go," she whispered, shaking her head at herself. "I was just imagining coming home to you."
"You were?" Hermione's eyes went wide. "Really?"
"I was imagining coming home every day and telling you about my day and, perhaps, curling up by the fire with you."
"Oh, Minerva," Hermione sighed. She wrapped her arms around Minerva tightly and held her so beautifully, that Minerva was in danger of crying again. "I want that, more than anything. And we can do that," she promised. "We can."
"Will you stay tonight?" Minerva asked, somehow needing to ask properly. "Stay with me? I wish to show you something in the morning. Something that has been a part of my life since I was a child."
"With you?" Hermione clarified.
Minerva paused and looked up at the look of acceptance on Hermione's face and cupped the woman's cheek.
"With me," she nodded.
"I would love to," Hermione smiled. "And I cannot wait to see whatever it is. I like surprises."
"You do?" Minerva blinked, cataloguing that fact.
"To a point," Hermione admitted with a laugh. "Shall we go and lounge in front of the fire and you can tell me about your day?"
Minerva nodded and tangled their hands together. There was a confidence, somehow, in the admission of her feelings and she grinned as she settled on the sofa.
"Let me?"
"Sure," Hermione grinned.
Minerva settled against the back and Hermione lay in front of her, with her head against her shoulder and her arms wrapped around her middle. Almost in unison, they sighed and Minerva remember the way that Hermione's fingers had wandered - her lips rested against Minerva's skin and her fingers had scorched gently over her scalp and the comfort and love that she'd felt to be on the receiving end of that. She cautiously pressed a kiss against Hermione's forehead and brushed away her hair when she looked up at her.
"How was your day," she paused. "Love?"
Minerva closed her eyes and could not, nor wanted to, fight the smile that appeared on her lips.
She spoke quietly, all the while with a smile on her face. She spoke to Hermione of the troubles she had and the moments where she wished she could redo. Hermione stopped her at one point.
"Do you want me to listen or may I offer commentary?"
"Oh," Minerva smiled, cupping her cheek. "No, please do."
"Alright," Hermione chuckled.
She spoke a little longer after prompting from Hermione and when Hermione offered her own words, it developed into a conversation that Minerva had craved for so long. She had had conversations with Hermione before of course, but now, she had unfettered access to Hermione's thoughts and feelings. And little, to no reservations of her own. It was glorious.
They ended up laughing together until later when Minerva realised they hadn't eaten.
"Gracious, you must be famished," she said apologetically.
"I'm alright," Hermione chuckled, stretching a little. Her shirt rode up slightly and Minerva couldn't help but glance down at the sliver of skin on show.
"You can look, you know," Hermione said softly. "I look at you."
"Hermione," Minerva muttered, making to sit up. A soft hand on her shoulder stopped her.
"I look at you. I think you're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my life."
"You must get out more."
"For someone so formidable, Minerva McGonagall," Hermione muttered. "Your self-esteem is rubbish."
Minerva laughed and lay back down, meeting Hermione's eyes as she shifted and leaned up on her hand.
"You are the beautiful one, Hermione," Minerva said. "I am not a classic beauty, I never have been. I am too skinny and too boyish. I have never been a looker."
"Says who?"
Minerva faltered.
"Everyone?"
"Who?" Hermione challenged again. "Who told you that you were anything other than the most exquisite human being?"
"Hermione -"
"I'm going to do something right now," Hermione muttered, tracing her finger along Minerva's too-small nose. "And if you want me to stop, I will. But if you don't want me to stop, I won't, alright?"
"I -"
Hermione kissed her.
