Holy horse shit!... Pony shit?

Riki's Pov

So, I open my mouth to askes a question, "Who the fuck are you guys!?" One of the best questions I can askes right now.

"Riki!" Liz shouted.

"What!?"

"That's not how you treat our guests!" She said, staring deep into my eyes. That look reminds me of dad when I say or do something bad or stupid. The bad part is she knows I don't like it and pulls it out when she needs to.

But not this time!

I quickly pulled down the hood of the onesie to cover my eyes. "Umm... 'Our' guests? More like your guests, and stop looking at me like that!" As I take off my hood, I can see the purple unicorn walk up to me. She's a little cautious of me, so I try to put on a welcoming smile. I need to say something quickly. "How's it hanging." Fuck.

The purple one looks at me with a raised eyebrow and clears her throat. "Umm... Hello, my name is Twilight Sparkle, and these are my friends. Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie- "She was interrupted by a pink blur that slammed against my chest. Stumbling back a little to see a pink muzzle pressed against my face. I was about to say something, but she was faster.

"HiyamynameisPinkiePiewhat'syournamedoyoulikepartywhatisyourfavoritetypeofcakewhat'syourfavoritetypeoficecremooohhhhyouhaveniceeyesyoursister" The only thing I got was her name. After that, my mind just blacked out. She is still talking, and I think she hasn't taken a breath in a few minutes. After a while, she stopped talking and looked at me like she wanted me to answer a question.

"...Yes?"

"Yaaaaayyyyy!" Pinkie cheered.

I pulled her off me and placed her next to Twilight. "Liz, why are their talking ponies in the house? Also, why is the water not working?" I said in the calmest voice I could muster. Looking down at Twilight, "Oi, why do you look so on edge?"

"Well, when Liz told us about you... She didn't tell us that-"

"That you are so bucking big!" Rainbow Dash interrupts.

"Rainbow Dash!"

"Try to look less intimidating, just a little," Liz added.

I'm puzzled right now. How am I intimidating? How do I be less intimidating? I'm in a frog onesie. That is as low as I can go. "Oi, Liz, just answer the other questions."

Liz sat there thinking and played with her hair. "Let me answer both your questions at once. Go look out the window, and that well answer everything."

Okay, let me check the window. Pushing aside the curtain and what I'm looking at shook me. A forest, my house is in a forest. Wait, wolves? I see five of them. They can't be wolves; they are a lot bigger than normal. Also, the 'wolves' look like they are made of wood and leaves. Looking out the window just gave me more questions, the fuck. "Holy horse shit! ...Pony shit? I don't care, but I need answers. What am I looking at?" I asked, trying to keep myself together.

Applejack answered me, "Well, sugercube, those are Timberwolves."

"And your house is in Everfree Forest, one of the most dangerous places here in Equestria," Twilight finished.

A lot of things are running in my head. Everfree Forest? Equestria? "The hell are we, Liz!? Because we are not in New York or Earth!" I said a little less calmly. I feel a hand or hoof on my leg. Looking down to see Twilight's foreleg wrapped around my right leg.

"You and Liz are on Equus, not Earth. We don't know how you guys got here." She said, doing a comforting nuzzle to my leg. "My friends and I will help you guys out. But, we are kind of stuck here."

"Because of the Timberwolves, right?"

"Right."

"Wait, Liz, how did you meet them?" I asked, "And why are their Timberwolves outside my house waiting to rip us apart!?"

"Well, I should start at the beginning," Liz said while tapping her chin. I walked to the table to lean on it, and Twilight sat back down. "Okay, I got up early to work on

Flashback

Liz's Pov

Waking up in my workshop still wearing the same clothes. I crawled off the table and accidentally knocked down a few things. Doing a nice long stretch and a yawn, I reach in my pocket to pull out my phone to see the time. "7 o'clock on the dot. I should get started on the panels." I said to myself. I when to grab everything I need, like a few fuses, cables, screwdriver, etc. Picking up the backpack and putting it on. "Wait, is it lighter? No... I'm getting stronger!" I chuckle. "Riki will be so proud of me. I should check to see if he's up?"


I slowly open the door to see Riki still sleeping. I do see Louie moving around, so I called out to him as quietly as possible. "[size=0.75em]Hey, Louie come here[/size]." He hops off Riki and walks up to me to let out a low meow. "Since Riki is a lazy ass this morning, do you want to come with me to the roof?" I asked. Louie jumps up to my shoulder and rubs his head on my cheek. "I'll take that as a yes," I chuckled. Walking out of the room with Louie still on my shoulder to a hallway closet. Inside is a few boxes and a pulldown ladder that goes to the roof. Taking out the flashlight while the boxes to the power box. Opening up the power box to see how bad the damage is... It's bad but could be worse. Pulling on the goggles and fixing my hair back over my left eye. "Let's do this!"

It didn't take that long, only 30 minutes. I just changed a few fuses, replaced some cables, stuff like that. "Good, all done! It will take a while for power to come back on. Hey, Louie, let's go to the roof. I want to see if any of the panels are broken or need any cleaning." Pulling the ladder down and climbing up. I can already hear the birds chirping and the smell of...fresh...air? Wait, what!? Louie and I poked our heads out to see trees around us. "I know I haven't been outside for a while. But New York doesn't look like this!" I said, going into full panic mood. "How did we get here? Where are we? I am freaking out!" Louie hops off my shoulder and walks around the roof like nothing is happening. "Good to see someone is having fun. I need to get Riki and tell him what's going on! Come on, Louie, let's go... Louie? Louie, where are you-"I turn my head to see Louie jumping to the lower roof and then the ground. He runs off in the woods ahead. I stand there for a while thinking about my life... Fuck.

Fuck! I quickly climbed down the ladder and ran out of the closet and through the kitchen. I opened the door and ran in the same direction that Louie fled off to. Calling out for him to see if he comes back, but nothing. Pushing my way through the damn stupid bushes, vines, and low hanging branches. "I hate this so much! I should have got Riki to help," I grumbled. "I hope it doesn't take long."


I HATE this so so much. I have been walking mindlessly for about an hour, and I accidentally ate a few bugs. Also, I think something is watching me, great. I was about to turn back until I heard a ringing sound. Ringing? "The chocolate chip muffins are done!" Pinkie said joyfully.

Flashback End

We all sat around the table while Pinkie took out the muffins. Riki picks one up and takes a bite. Just by looking at him, I can tell he loves it. "These are the best muffin I ever had!" Riki said, shoving the rest in his mouth. "Yet, last time I checked, we don't have a muffin pan or chocolate chip?"

The other and I start to dig in too, and he is right. They are amazing!

"Happy that we are eating these amazing muffins," I said. "So, can I get back to my story?

They all nod.

"Okay, where was I? Yes, I was about to turn back."

Flashback... Start Again

I was about to turn back until I heard a meowing sound. Looking up to see Louie landing on a tree branch, sleeping like everything is normal. "I really dislike you right now, cat," I mumbled. I called for him to come down, and he jumped on my head. "I really, [b]Really[/b] dislike you!"

Walking back to the house, I can hear voices coming from behind. "Somebody is here, and they might be able to help us!" I said to Louie. "But, we should be careful just to make sure they're not dangerous." Slowly walking to the voices, I can pick out five or six. Going to the nearby bushes to hide and holding Louie under my arm.

"Twi, Darling, are you sure that what we're looking for is here?"

"Yes, Rarity, It's here!" Twilight replied. "Princess Celestia and Luna said that something just popped into Everfree. So, have to be here... Somewhere."

Princess? What are they talking about? Shifting a little bit closer to hear better, but I can't see them through the bushes.

"W-What i-if it's a... Monster."

"Flutter, don't worry! If it's a monster, I'll handle it!"

"Thanks, Rainbow Dash!"

Wow, those are some weird names. Are there a bunch of hippies or cultures because both seem bad in this case. Louie starts to wiggle in my arms.

"Louie, stop it!" I whisper harshly. He keeps moving, and it's shaking the bushes.

"Girls, did you hear that?" Twilight asked. "I think it's coming from the bushes."

Oh shit!

Louie finally wiggles free from my arms and runs out of the bushes. "Fuck," I really, really, really dislike you, cat. All I hear is gasps from them.

"It's a cat?" Twilight questions.

Slowly peeking out the bushes and looking at six colorful things. They look like a mix of a large dog and a fuzzy stuffed animal. Also, they can talk... What the fuck!? Seeing the yellow one walk up to Louie and put a ha- hoof? On this head, and starts to pet him.

"This cat looks so cute. It looks like it's wearing tiny pants; that is adorable!" Fluttershy coo. "Oh, your eye, what happened?" Louie responds with a few low meows. "That's sad. Do you have a name, and if so, where's your owner?"

Louie does a few meows and looks in my way.

Quickly hid, hoping that they didn't see me. Slowly crawling my way out, my back hits something. Looking back, to see a blue rainbow haired horse thing with its wings outstretched. I rolled out of the bushes and landed in front of the other horses. The one with a hat goes up to me, with the blue coming out to the group. There is one thing I can do in a situation like this. Curling up in a little ball and plead, "P-Please d-don't eat m-me! I probably taste bad and give you stomach pains!" I begged. I feel something rubbing against my head. Looking to see Louie doing it, letting out low meows trying to cheer me up. The purple one walks up to me.

"We are not going to eat you," said Twilight.

"You're not?"

"Ponies don't eat meat... Well, some eat fish, but that's not the point."

"Ponies?"

They all nod

A pony with a hat came up to me. "Howdy, may I ask, what are you?"

"I'm a human,"

"A hoo-man?" she replied.

"No. An HU-man or homo sapiens if you want to get scientific," I corrected her. Then the pink one pops up behind me.

"Really? I thought you were some weird minotaur with no horns or a hairless monkey," said Pinkie.

"I think it's just a monster," Rainbow huffed.

Getting off the ground and brushing off the dirt. I can see they are a bit surprised about how big I am. Finally, I can use my height to my advantage. "First, I'm not an 'It' I'm a girl. Second, I'm no 'Monster' or 'Thing.' And third, my name is Elizabeth June Philips or Liz for short."

Twilight comes up to me. "Liz, it's nice to meet you. My name is Twilight Sparkle, and these are my friends. Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie." She said, pointing to each pony. "So, Liz, where are you from?"

"It's nice to meet you, ponies, and I'm from New York in the U.S.A. But, see where I'm at... This is not New York or Earth, my world."

"So, you really are from another world! That's amazing!" Twilight exclaimed.

"Another world or dimension? Still trying to wrap my head around it."

"You're an alien; you better not try to take over Equestria! Because that's not cool!" Rainbow said aggressively and got in my face.

I put my hands up defensively. "W-wait, I don't want to take over Equestria. What is Equestria?"

"Well, this is the land of Equestria on the planet Equus. But, more pacific you and your cat-"

"Louie."

"You and Louie are in Everfree Forest, a very dangerous place." She finished. "So, we should leave before-"

*GRRRRRR

I knew I was being followed.

We all turn to see five wooden wolves slowly making their way to us. Some of them have dry blood on them." Holy horse shit! ...Pony shit!? I don't care. What are fuck are those!" I yelled while picking up Louie.

"Timberwolves!" Twilight shouted. "We need to go!" We all ran deep into the forest. The Timberwolves are not letting us good without a chase.

"I said we fight them!" Rainbow said as she gets ready to turn around. The Timberwolves are getting closer, baring their fangs. Applejack pulls Rainbow back by the tail.

"Hang on, Rainbow Dash!" Twilight said. "We should find a place to hide."

"Yes," Rainbow said sarcastically. "How about can hide in a tree or a really nice bush. No, a really dark cave or-"

"What about my house?" I asked. They all look at me little. I said something stupid. "What?"

"You have a house?" asked Rarity.

"Well, it's my brother's house. He wouldn't mind us hiding there." I said.

"Brother? Ooohhh, is he nice!?" Pinkie asked.

"Yeah, he's a nice guy, kind of looks like me...but a boy. A Lazy ass, probably still sleeping the day away. Doesn't even know that I'm getting attacked." I said with a shrug.

"What if it's a trap!?" Rainbow said.

"Look, it's not a trap! I know you guys just meet me and don't trust me that much, but-" Looks at the Timberwolves "-I think you should since in this predicament." Applejack looks into my eyes and nods.

"She tellin' the truth," she said.

"Good, It's up ahead!"

We push through the branches and bushes, also going over a few roots. But, there was this one big question I have going through my mind.

What is the weirdest thing that is happening to me right now?

A) Running away from killer wooden wolves.

B) Running with talking colorful ponies.

C) How can I keep up with ponies and outrun wolves.

D) ALL OF THE FUCKIN' ABOVE!

We have been running for a few minutes, and I'm getting tired. Holy shit, I'm out of shape... Never in shape in the first place.

"Liz, Darling, how long to the house!" Rarity panted.

"Not too long, it's just-Aaaahhhhh!" I was interrupted by a sixth Timberwolve coming out of the wood. Charging at me, ready to dig its fangs into my face. Time seems to slow down a little. Damn, these Timberwolves are pretty smart for not showing all their members. Why am I complimenting them? One is right now going to bite off my face. Before the Timberwolf gets any closer to me, it was hit by a purple...beam? Sending the wolf into a bunch of trees, killing it. Seeing that the beam came from Twilight, I gave her thank you nod.

I can see the house from here. I was kind of glad that I had left the door open. "That's it, go inside!" I shouted. We all run inside the hallway tripping over each other; one of the wolves is about to come in. Quickly slammed the door on its head repeatedly as hard as I could. Applejack comes to the door, raises her hind legs then kicks it in the face.

Closing and locking the door as I slid down, trying to catch my breath.

"Are you okay?" asked Fluttershy.

I coughed a few times, finally getting my breath back. "Yeah, just tired-"My stomach growls." And I can eat; I did skip breakfast. Come on; I'll show you guys the kitchen." Get up and walking to the kitchen and all of them trots behind me.

"Lizzy!" Pinkie said gleefully as we entered the kitchen.

"Lizzy? Uh...yeah?" I said.

"Can I make some chocolate chip muffins!" she asked.

As they all got seated(Thank God we have enough chairs), I going to the sink and turned it on, but nothing. "I like to but, I don't think we have all ingredients for chocolate chip muffins," I said, turning around, and what I saw shocked me. Pinke somehow haves everything she needs on the table." Pinke, where did you find all of this?"

"My hair."

I was going to say something, but Twilight interrupted me. "It's best not to ask, so... Can you tell me about your world!" she said, poofing up a piece of paper and quill.

Flashback End... Again

"And that's pretty much it," I said.

"Okay, that's a lot to pick up," Riki said, rubbing my temples. "What now... And I really want to take a shower! You to Liz, you smell."

"You guys can take one at my place until the Timberwolves leave," Twilight said.

I can see the look on Riki's face, and I know that look. His eyes began to focus, and a grin appeared on his face. "Oi, Twilight! If I get rid of the Timberbitches, I can take a shower?" Riki asked.

"Uh...umm... Yes, but there are five of them out there. Let us help you."

"Thanks... But, no, I can handle this. The Timberbitches are stopping me for a nice hot shower, and they will pay!" Riki shouted. "I'll be back. I need to change!" Riki runs out of the kitchen and up to his room.

"Will he okay fighting alone, Liz." Fluttershy asked, "Should we stop him?"

"Timberwolves are some very dangerous creatures. A while back, those dang varmints killed some of my cattle." Applejack said while slamming her hoof on the table.

I got up to look out the window and still see them out there, "That's not going to stop my big bro, even if I try to stop him." I chuckled. "Once something gets in his way, he will keep ramming into it until it falls, or he does. I have seen him act like this a few times... Maybe a little more than a few." I shrug and sit back down.


Riki walks back into the kitchen, wearing the clothes he did yesterday. With the addition of black and gray high tops also his favorite zip-up hoodie. It's fully gray except for half of the sleeves black, and with a white drawstring. On his hands are black MMA grappling gloves. When it comes to fashion, he doesn't really care.

"Okay, are they still there?" he asked.

"Yeah, they are. Are you sure you can handle fighting those Timberwolves? You do have six talking ponies that will help, right?

The ponies all nod.

"It's fine. Plus, those Timberbitches are going to be my stress reliever." He said while walking to the front door. "You guys going to watch?"

"We can see from the kitchen...be safe," I said.

"Oh, wait!" he said, coming back into the room. "I never formally introduce myself to you guys. My name is Ricochet Gold Phillips or Riki.

Riki's Pov

Going to the door and stopped. I take a few deep breaths and slap my face with both my hands. Walking out the door on the porch seeing the Timberwolves pacing back and forth. Time to get their attention. "Oi, Timberbitches!" I yelled, walking off the porch. I see Liz and the ponies staring through the window to my right. Some of them or most of them look worried. Looking back at the wolves and cracking my knuckles. "You can leave, or you can become firewood. Don't really care what you choose, Timberbitches." I said as they started to surround me in a circle. I'm glad the Timberbitches are staying around for a fight. Slamming both my fist and begin to chuckle. "Well then..."

"Let's get funky!"

The Timberwolves(TW) to my left TW1 and right TW2 start to charge me. Quickly jumping into the air so they both run into each other. But I jumped a little too high, like 10ft in the damn air. The last time I checked, I can't do that with out a running start. I think about that later. Well, using the new high to my amazing advantage, I came down hard, slamming my feet on their head. I can hear the cracking of wood underneath my feet. Hopping off their head to the ground, I can hear Liz calling my name.

"What is it, Liz! Kind of busy!" I responded as I dodged TW3, kicking it in the head.

She opened the window and said, "I figured it out!"

"Figured what out!?"

"How you can jump higher, and I can keep up with ponies running! It's the gravity! It's weaker than the Earth's gravity. We can jump higher, run faster-"

I get a smile on my face as I dodge roll from TW4 bite and going behind it and grab its tail. "And" Picking it up and slamming it hard into the ground. Cracking its back and throwing it into TW3, "STRONGER!" I roared.

"Yeah, stronger too." She said, rolling her eyes.

Picking up the pace and running to TW5, it lunges forward for a bite. I pulled back my right fist to hit with a nice solid uppercut. Putting everything into that hit, knocking its head clean off. I can hear oohs and aahs from the girls; I'm a little bit surprised too. Not getting caught up in my short victory, I have four Timberbitches left to turn into a pile of twigs. TW2 and 3 run at me full speed next to each other. I spin around TW2, landing an ax kick on its back, breaking it in half. TW3 jumps at me. Grabbing it by the throat and threw it over my shoulder into the trees. But, I put too much force and slipped onto my back. TW1 and 4 take this chance to go for my face and throat. "Shit!" I quickly move both my hands behind my back.

Liz's Pov

"Ricochet!" I cried. Is he really going to die? He can't just die. I'll be alone here. I can't lose Riki; he's the only one I have left. Twilight horn starts to glow, and Rainbow wings begin to flap, ready to break the window with Applejack. I try moving, but I can't... I'm too scared.

"I'm fine!" Riki called out.

"Riki!" We all yelled happily.

A wave of relief hits us all, but how is he fine? Looking closely to see that he has something in both his hands. Blocking the attacks. "What does he have?" asked Twilight.

"It looks like he has two pipes," said Pinkie.

I thought to myself a bit. Two pip- "His tonfas!" I shouted, pointing at his solid gray aluminum tonfas.

"His, what?" said Rarity.

"Tonfas! He rarely used them in a fight. But, when he has to, he is really dangerous." I informed them. "Like Bruce Lee with nunchucks type of dangerous."

"Who's Bruce Lee?" asked Fluttershy.

"I don't know, but he sounds awesome," Rainbow said.

Riki's Pov

"That was close. If I didn't bring my tonfas, I would be dead." I huffed, finally pushing them off. Kicking one in the leg and the other in the side. Then kick up off the ground dusting myself off. Okay, time to get serious and crack some wood. I rush to TW1, spinning my right tonfas and slamming it across the head, killing it. TW4 lunges toward me, I quickly jump back a little too far. Damn, after this, I need to learn how to control my new strength. TW4 and I rush each other, jumping over 4, then slam both fronts ends my tonfas on its head, and shout out. "[b]Double Hammer![/b]" I can feel Liz rolling her eyes at me. It was hard not to name an attack.

That was a good workout and all my stress melted away, even if I'm on a different planet in another universe and or dimension.

...And it's all back.

"Oi, Twilight, where do you live at?"


"Pony-OW-ville!?" I said as Liz repeatedly hits me in the arm. "You guys-OW-all live in Ponyville?" All of us are slowly walking through the forest. Keeping close just in case any more Timberbitches decides to show up. Liz has her backpack with just her clothes and our bathroom stuff. Yeah, I know I'm going to wear the same clothes, sue me.

"Yes, It is a wonderful place!" Twilight said joyfully. "Well, when nothing crazy or dangerous is happening."

"And you live in a big tree that is also-OW-a library?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Cool, excuse me for a bit Twilight," I said, turning to Liz. "Oi, can you stop hitting me? Your punches actually hurt now!"

"No! I'm doing it cuz I care about you. Now take it like a man!" She growled and hit me again. I grabbed her by the wrist, pulled her in, and flicked her in the forehead, hard enough to leave a red mark. She pulls back, rubbing her forehead and cursing under her breath.

"Well, I have many questions, like why are you guys doing in Everfree Forest in the first place?" I asked.

"I have questions too!" Liz added

"I can answer all of them once we get to my place," Twilight said. "And look, we're at the exit of Everfree now. So, it's just smooth sailing."

We are all standing in the greenest field I have ever seen. And in the distance, not too far away, is Ponyville. I'm really getting very excited to check it out. Slowly moving away from the group, I feel something wrapping around my neck. I look behind to see Pinkie on my back with a big smile.

"It looks super amazing, right!?" She said.

Putting my arms underneath her into a piggyback ride...or a Pinkieback ride.

"Yeah, want to look around right now!" I said impatiently. "I love to see new places back home; it was one of the best parts of my job. I want to go down there right now!"

PInkie leans into my ear and whispers "We can go right now."

My eyes widen. "We can?"

Liz's Pov

"Twilight, Darling."

"Yes, Rarity," She answered.

"How will the ponies react to our new guests?" Rarity said worriedly. "You remember how we all reacted to Zecora."

"I know, but that was a long time ago. I think the ponies here won't freak out, right girls?"

Applejack said, "Half and half, maybe less." Rainbow and Fluttershy nod.

"Guys, me and Riki will be on our best behavior. So that the ponies know that we are not a threat, right Riki." I said with confidence. I waited for a bit so he could respond, but I'm not getting anything. "Ummm... Riki? Are you going to say something like, 'Right, we won't fuck up anything or do anything stupid?'...Riki?"

Fluttershy taps my leg. I look down at the now worried pony. "Umm... Don't get mad, but he's gone." Twilight eye twitched, and I think I blacked out for a few seconds after she said that.

"Y'all, Pinkie is gone!" Applejack said. "I reckon they went into town."

They all starting to get worried; hell, I'm starting to worry too. Say something. "Calm down; It's just Riki and Pinkie. How bad can it be... Umm, why does my head hurt now?"

Twilight sits down and starts to rub her temples. "When Pinkie being Pinkie plus-"

"Riki's curiosity is so strong it can kill all cats in a 20-mile radius... Sorry, Louie." I said. Louie let out a low meow and hung his head.

Twilight looks at me and takes a deep breath. "I was going to say something else, but let's go with that. Come on, let's go. Rainbow can you go find and tell them to meet us at my home"

"You got it, Twi!" Rainbow spreads her wings and takes off.

Riki, I hope you are okay.


Riki's Pov

This place looks amazing! It reminds me of a medieval town but a bit nicer. Also, I saw a club called 'The Rolling Hay.' I'm just going to leave that there. I'm currently walking through the marketplace. Well, that's what Pinkie called it. I'm getting weird looks from the ponies here. Is it because I have a pink pony around my neck...yeah, that's it. They are keeping their distance from me, but I don't care. Also, no screams of terror, that's good. Hell, some of them thought I was Pinkie's pet. A few kids came up to ask Pinkie if they could pet me. Pinkie is telling me all story about Ponyville. Big stuff like some asshole name Discord that fucked up the town or little things like some asshole minotaur name Iron Will. Right now, she's telling me about her job as a baker.

"Wow, Pinkie, I should have known that you are a baker, your fuckin' amazing!"

"Awwww, thanks, Riki." She said, nuzzling me. "How about we go to Sugarcube Corner. I can make you some cupcakes!"

"I would like to, but shouldn't we head to Twilight's treehouse? We did leave every-" I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and pointed at a medium-size building. It has a music note sign that says 'Tapping Hoof' and vinyl records decorating the roof. "Oi, Pinkie. That's a record store, right?" I asked.

"Yeah, it is. How did you know that anyway?"

Is she serious, right? I looked at the store and then back to her. "It's just a hunch," I deadpan. "Come on, we're going in!"

"Okie Dokie Loki!"

Went we walked in, hip-hop music was playing throughout the store. Damn, I didn't even hear it from outside. Are the walls soundproof? Looking around, I see generic record store stuff like posters, CDs, stereos, and headphones. "Is there anyone in here? Must be a slow day." I said, shifting through CDs. "Oi, Pinkie, do you know who works here?"

She shifted a little on my back and said. "I totally do! Her name is Vinyl Scratch, and she is also a DJ!" And on cue, a head-bobbing unicron with headphones walks out the backroom. She goes past us to the front desk and starts to tap her hooves to the beat that only she can hear. "Come on, let's go say hi!" She said, getting off my back. We go up to the front; Vinyl is still jamming out, not noticing us. Okay, this reminds me of Liz when she works on something. I usually take the tools out of her hands to get her attention. So I reached over and took her headphones, which did the trick.

"Hey, I was listening-" Vinyl's words died went she sees me. I put on my best smile, just to show that I'm not a threat.

Pinkie goes up to Vinyl's side and pulls her into a hug. "Vinyl, I went you to meet, Riki! He's a human and from another world!"

"Oi, how it hanging," I said, waving.

"Umm... Good, nice to meet you."

"Well, that's nice. I thought you would be freaking out. You know, because I look weird."

"I think you're kind of cool, I like weird stuff." She said, pushing up her glasses. "Oh, you probably went to buy something, my bad."

"I don't have any money. You know, from another world. I was just browsing to see this world's music. But Pinkie and I should get going. We have to go to the treehouse." Pinkie jumps back on my back. "I'll try to talk to you later."

"Wait, if you have any free time, swing by here; we can listen to some music."

"I would like that, and I can show you music from my home."

"Also... Can I get my headphones back?" She asked with her hoof out.

I smiled sheepishly and gave back the headphones, "Sorry, kind of forgot. Well, see you later!"

"Bye-bye, Vinyl!" said Pinkie waving goodbye.

As we walk out of the building, I hear someone calling out to us. "Pinkie, Riki, there you guys are!" I look around then the sky to see Rainbow Dash. Also, she's coming too hot! I quickly did a side step to the left and watched her eat dirt. I hope she's okay.

"Hey, Dashie!" Pinkie said joyfully.

"Oi, Rainbow Dash...you alright?" I said, staying over her. "You need help?"

"No, I'm good," she got up and fixed her wings back into place. "Where the buck you two to been!" Rainbow shouted.

"Just looking around,"

"Well, come on!" she said, pushing my leg. "The others are probably at Twi's place right now."

"Alright, to the Treebrary!" I exclaim. They look at me with one of their eyebrows raised. "Treebrary because it's a- Nevermind, let's just go," I said with my head hung low.


Wow, that's a treehouse. I can't believe I never noticed this while walking around. Weirdly I have a strange urge to climb it... Damn ancestors! Went up to the door and knocked on it. A few moments later, it opens to reveal a purple and green lizard. The lizard is small, going up to my knees. Pinkie jumps off my back and goes up to the lizard.

"Yo, Spike, the others are inside?" Rainbow asked.

"Spiky, how's it going!" Pinkie said, pulling him(I think it's a he)into a hug.

He still has his eyes on me. "Umm...good, just good, and yeah."

Pinkie and Rainbow Dash walk in, just leaving him and me. Fuck what do I say? We can't keep staring at each other; the awkwardness is getting too heavy for me. When it gets too much, I just leave. Hell if an awkward TV scene happens, I just leave the room. Okay, time to end this.

"Oi, I'm Riki the human,"

"I'm Spike the dragon and Twilight's number one assistant," he said with pride.

"Oh, your Twilight's assistant, that's- WAIT, YOU'RE A DRAGON!"

He nods

I squatted down close to him. "That's soooo cool! Can you breathe fire or another element? Can you fly? Well, I don't see wings, or are you the type of dragon that doesn't need wings to fly?"

"Oh, just fire, and I can't fly yet," he answered.

"How long are you two going to be out there?" yelled Rainbow.

"Sorry!" we both called out.

I went inside to see everyone sitting on the couch. Liz is wearing her new clothes. She has on a striped blue and pink shirt with pink overalls shorts. She still has on the same shoes and goggles around her neck. Fixing her hair and turns at me with a pissed off look.

"What did I do?" I asked with my hands up.

Liz squints her eyes and then digs into her backpack, pulling out my towel and toothbrush. She chucked it at me and said, "Just take a shower, shit face!" Hitting my face pretty hard, making me stumble a bit.


Oh yeah, I needed that. I'm surprised that I can use the shower. Finish putting on the same clothes and also wrapping the towel around my neck. My mind feels clearer and more focused; I don't feel stressed too. This is pretty good. I don't think anything can mess this up for me. I head back down to the other. Liz was sitting on one of the couches with Applejack, Fluttershy, Louie, and Rainbow. Pinkie, Rarity, and Twilight are sitting across from them. The way they sit reminds me of a dog or cat, but more proper.

Twilight looks toward me and asks a question.

The one question I never expect from a purpler fuckin' pony.

"Hey, Riki, can you take off your clothes?"

I don't like where this is going.


Okay, if you are worried about how strong Riki is, he is slightly stronger than a fit earth ponies, right now. Liz is slightly weaker than the average earth pony.