The Night After That Thing You Said

Colin could not sleep. The day had taken an unusual turn. When the day had begun, he had only thought to make sure Lord Featherington had left town and returned the money he had conned out of several Lords. He had not expected to have kissed Penelope Featherington twice.

Now he couldn't stop thinking of kissing her. For someone he suspected had never been kissed, she was amazing. He knew he had to have surprised her. Still, she was a quick learner, and he could feel her tiny hands gripping on to his arms even now.

They had grown up together. It seemed so strange to think of her as anything other than a friend. But that had certainly been more than a friendly kiss. And he definitely wasn't thinking of her as a friend when he was clutching her soft curves against him.

It was at the Featherington ball he realised Penelope had become more than a friend to him. It was never a hardship dancing with her and despite what he had said later that evening, he didn't want to lose her to anyone else. They had sparked far too much interest. After all, that hadn't been the first dance he had danced with Penelope. He found himself looking for any reason to hold her hand. Others had noticed this too.

Suddenly he had competition for Penelope's attention. Originally he tried to convince himself that he was just being a good friend as some of the so called gentlemen had less than good intentions towards Pen. Then it hit him that he was jealous of anyone even thinking of her in a vaguely romantic way. He should have found some other way to dissuade them though. It was foolish to have denied any wish to court her at a ball held at her own home. Of course, she had overheard him.

The trouble was that he now knew what it was like to kiss Penelope Featherington. She was addictive. He was still craving her and that was after only kissing her twice. How was that possible when he was fairly certain that he was the first man to have kissed her.

This was not helping him get to sleep. He had briefly considered that Eloise may not be happy with him courting her best friend. But then she and Pen weren't currently on speaking terms at the moment. Also, if Eloise had not kept interrupting he ad Pen when they were having some pretty enlightening conversations, he might have come to his senses sooner. Possibly. Maybe.

It was hopeless trying to sleep. Penelope was there every time he closed his eyes. Perhaps some fresh air would help. Throwing on some clothes he headed out, careful not to wake anyone else in the household. He had no destination in mind, he just started walking. If he could not stop thinking of the tiny redhead who had snuck in and stolen control of his every waking thought, then perhaps he could just exhaust himself enough to be able to sleep.

He hadn't gone far when he spotted a familiar silhouette ahead of him. Heavens! How often did she leave her home by herself? Did she not realise how dangerous it was to be out by herself? The thought of something happening to her sent a chill through his bones that had nothing to do with the weather.

He picked up his pace a little to catch up with her. "What are you doing out at this time of night by yourself?"

She jumped at the sound of his voice. Composing herself quickly she kept walking. "Probably the same as you. I could not sleep."

He couldn't help but chuckle. He had always known she was intelligent with a quick wit. He just hadn't expected her humour to be so dry. "Well, it is your fault. Every time I close my eyes you are there waiting for me to kiss you."

"You kissed me of your own accord. I never asked you to." She actually seemed offended by his admission.

"No, that was all my doing." He had to admit. "It is more that I still want to kiss you."

"Do not be cruel Colin. I may not have been kissed by anyone other than family members before, but you surprised me." Even in the dark he knew she was blushing.

"I am not complaining, and I am not being cruel. I enjoyed kissing you." He reached out to stop her. She needed to see that he was serious.

She searched his face for any signs that he was lying. Clearly, she found none as she looked stunned. "Why do you not hate me as Eloise does?"

He doubted that it was even possible to hate Penelope Featherington. Eloise does not hate you. Neither do I. I'll admit I was furious when I found out you were Lady Whistledown. But as you reminded me, you tried to warn me regarding Marina. Once I got over the shock, I was impressed that you managed all of it without anyone finding out until now."

"Nobody ever notices me anyway." She shrugged. "It started as me ranting. As people began taking notice of what I wrote, I started charging for the papers. I thought if I was going to end up a spinster, I could at least be comfortable. Penelope Featherington might not be able to earn a living, but no one could stop Lady Whistledown from doing so."

"You are amazing." He was so in awe of her. "And you are not going to end up a spinster." He suddenly realised they had walked quite the distance. "Come, I'll walk you home." He took hold of her hand.

"There is no line of suitors waiting to ask for my hand Colin. My family is not like yours. Nobody is dreaming of marrying into the Featherington family. We have been lucky enough to survive several scandals, but that luck will not last forever. Not everyone belongs to a family who is admired as the Bridgertons are." Despite Antony's botched wedding to Edwina Sharma, Eloise's indiscretion with Theo Shaw and Marina's attempt to trap Colin into marriage, the Bridgertons were still a family to behold.

"So, you think we are selfish." Colin knew he had little to complain about and yet he had done exactly that to Penelope. He suspected she had heard quite a bit of complaining from Eloise as well.

"No." She looked frustrated. "Your entire family are good caring people. You all jump to the defence of anyone less fortunate than yourselves without a second thought." She sighed. "But you can also be very single minded at times. You want a purpose, so find one. You are in a position to do anything you choose. While Eloise does not have the options that are open to you, she still has more options than other women who will need to ensure their futures and their family's. Even if Eloise chooses to never marry, your brother will ensure she is comfortable."

This was a prospective he had never looked from. Of course, he knew the world was more suited to himself and his brothers than his mother and sisters. But he had not considered that it was even less suited to women who did not have heads of their household who were forward thinking like his brother.

They had almost reached their homes and he had yet to release her hand. She had given him a lot to think on, but he did not want to say good night to her. This midnight stroll would not help him sleep any better, but he had a further insight to her. He walked her to the same door they had been at that morning. "I am sorry if I ever made you feel ignored or invisible. I forget how lucky I am sometimes to have been born into the family I was."

"I did not say any of that to make you feel guilty. Just count your blessings that you have a Mama who wants to see you marry for love, not necessity." She gently removed her hand from his. "Good night."

Before he realised what he was doing or she could reach for the door, he reached around her and pulled her back into his arms. If he was going to lie awake thinking about her all night, he was going to make sure he recalled every detail. She let out a quiet gasp as his lips moulded to hers. Her tiny hands gripped his biceps as his tongue tangled with hers. Every time he kissed her it was better than the last. He gathered her soft body even closer to his hard body. It was a struggle to remember he was a gentleman and as such should not be thinking about taking any young woman up against the outside wall of her house.

Penelope deserved better though and so he slowly pulled away. "Sweet dreams Pen." He backed away not wishing to look away from this Enchantress who had yet to step inside her home.

Finally, she seemed to remember where she was and crept inside. Oh, his dreams were not going to be sweet. They were going to be hot and heavy.

Well, the purpose of going for a walk this late had been defeated by the very woman who had been keeping him awake. In all the years Penelope had been quietly, yet loyally supporting Eloise and even himself, neither of them had really noticed how difficult things were for Penelope. Instead, they had complained about how disgruntled they were about their lot in life while she patiently listened.

In hindsight it made perfect sense that she was Lady Whistledown. She was a good listener who was always overlooked. But the way she wrote was so bold and brave, yet witty.

"Where have you been?" He had been so consumed by his thoughts that he had not noticed Eloise lurking on the stairs.

"I could not sleep so I went for a walk." She was one to talk. What was she doing up this late? "Why are you still awake?" He sat beside her on the stairs.

Eloise sighed. "I could not sleep either." She watched him for a moment. "Do you think I am a hypocrite?"

"No, but I do think we both forget sometimes how privileged we are. I know at least that it is easier for me in society than it is for you. But despite Mother trying to find us all matches, she does not wish any of us to marry someone we do not love, or we will not be happy with." Now that Penelope had pointed it out, he realised that many a Mama had pushed their daughters in his brother's direction regardless of their daughter's feelings about them.

"So, when Mama parades you in front of suitable young ladies at Antony's wedding reception, you will not complain?" She was clearly amused by the thought of this.

"What if I have found the woman I wish to marry? She may not wish to marry me since I made a hurtful comment, I did not mean that she overheard." Despite having now kissed Penelope three times, he was uncertain that she trusted his intentions towards her.

"Then I am sure Mama will be overjoyed and determined to assist you in obtaining the young lady's affections." Eloise would be all for that if it meant her Mama's attention would be off finding a suitor for her.

"What if I had her affections and was too blind to notice until it was too late?" He hoped it wasn't too late and there was still a chance he could fix what he had broken.

Eloise searched his face. "So, you have finally noticed that Penelope has been pining over you for years." Clearly, she was still annoyed over Penelope being Lady Whistledown. "Why do you feel it might be too late? I feared Penelope might never come to her senses over you."

Obviously, Eloise was joking. She so enjoyed teasing him. But it didn't stop her barb from hitting him directly. "She overheard me saying I would never court her."

"Oh." Quite the understatement from Eloise. "Pen does not hold a grudge for long. Do you not recall how Lady Whistledown humiliated you in regards to Lady Crane?"

"I do. But I also recall that Penelope warned me that Marina had feelings for another. I informed her that I knew both my mind and Marina's and she had nothing to be concerned about. How many times did she warn you and you did not listen?"

Eloise had the good grace to look at least a little guilty. "Several. But could she not have found some other way than publishing it?"

"Such as?" Colin knew how stubborn his sister was. Even if Penelope had found another way, Eloise would have still gotten into trouble as she seldom thought before speaking. "You and I both prided ourselves on including Pen. But when it comes to listening to the voice of reason, we have been as bad as the rest of the Ton for ignoring her."

Begrudgingly Eloise acknowledged her brother was correct. "So how are you planning to win Penelope back?"

"No clue. Any ideas?" Despite having stolen a few kisses he was not certain Penelope would want to risk her heart in his hands.

"I am hardly the best person to ask. Although you could actually court Pen." Clearly being courted was less than appealing to Eloise, but she knew Penelope better than he did. "That is unless you were serious about not courting her."

"Not at all." Actually, he had said the first thing that had popped into his head. The others had been ribbing him over disappearing with Penelope. Then even more so over his dancing with her. They had admired the grace she had on the dancefloor until it became known that Lord Featheringtons mines did not exist and therefore neither did her dowery.

"Then you had better start courting her." Eloise nudged his shoulder. "I recommend you tell Mama so that she can focus on marrying off Benedict."

He couldn't help but chuckle at that. "You do realise that Benedict is hiding out in the country which means she will focus on you instead."

Groaning Eloise stood. "You would have thought she would have given up by now."

"You know Elle, if you choose to marry someone who was not a Lord, Baron or even rich, Mother would not object. She only wishes for us to be happy and have secure futures." Colin shook his head. "Even if we fell in love with the poorest person on the planet, Antony would still ensure we were comfortable."

"We are luckier than most, are we not?" Eloise seemed to have an epiphany. "Most have to marry for wealth. We have the luxury of choosing someone we love."

"Yes. That was recently pointed out to me." Colin smiled at the memory. "Elle, do you know that Penelope's Father had left the family in debt?"

"No." Eloise shook her head. "Why did Pen not say anything?"

"How could she?" Colin feared that the Featheringtons financial woes may be far worse than he had already discovered. "If word were to get out, the entire family would be ruined."

"Something else we should be grateful for." Eloise scoffed. "At least our Parents are honourable and made certain we had futures. So, Pen has no dowry and neither has Prudence. That will not encourage suitors."

"I do not require her dowry." Colin only wanted Penelope.

"Yes, but as we had already mentioned, we are luckier than most." Eloise patted her brother on the shoulder. "Try and get some sleep. Penelope is the most forgiving person I know. However, we must shoulder some of the blame over what has happened."

"So, in other words we have some work ahead of us." Colin had realised this. Penelope had a certain bite to her when pushed to the limit.

"Anyone or anything worth having always has to be worked for, does it not?" Eloise headed up to her room, leaving him to his thoughts.

The trouble was not with courting Penelope. He found that he was eager to learn more about this enigma of a woman who had been in front of him all this time. Winning her mother over was another thing.

Portia Featheringtons expression had made her feelings perfectly clear when he admitted his blunder. She had haughty informed him that if he had no interest in her youngest daughter, that was one thing. But to dissuade anyone else from courting her was not the actions of a gentleman. Then she had pointed out how often he had sought out Penelope's company. This was not the actions of someone not interested.

He could not argue with that. Despite explaining that he only had the best of intentions in regards to Penelope. Assessing his actions over the years he recalled how often he had been caught in her gaze. He was never disappointed to see her. It was just that he had convinced himself that it was because she was Eloise's friend.

Now he was going to have to win over both Penelope and her mother. He didn't know which would be more difficult. A week ago, he would have said Portia Featherington but Pen had shown him that she was not going to make it easy for him. After being tormented by people like Cressida Cowper, he could hardly blame her for expecting better from someone who was supposed to be a friend.

Making his way to his room he began to work out how he was going to court Penelope. He couldn't just blurt out a marriage proposal. She would turn it down thinking he had only proposed out of guilt. While he would not want her mother or sister to chaperone them, he could always ask his sisters or Mother. Eloise may even jump at the chance if it meant getting away from any match making attempts by their mother.

With the basics of a plan in place he attempted to sleep. If kissing Penelope twice had made his mind race, kissing her three times made his dreams more vivid and realistic. He could practically feel her in his arms. Her curves begging to be explored. Her quiet gasps and sighs echoing in his ears as their kisses grew more passionate and their movements more in sync.

How could he have ever thought that he would be able to resist falling for her. Those expressive blue eyes, those voluptuous curves, that quick wit and caring intellect. She was everything he wanted. Spending the rest of his life with her would never be boring.

She was so responsive that he could only imagine what making love with her would be like. Going purely by what kissing her was like, his imagination had plenty to work with. His dreams venturing far passed kissing her soft full lips and exploring down her neck and across her collarbone. Her passion filled sighs encouraging him further.

His body was rock hard to the point of almost being painful as his dream led him further down the path of her body. Her breasts inviting his lips to explore their fullness. Her cries of his name when he accepted their invitation.

A knock at his bedroom door ripped him from the dream. "Colin! Breakfast will be cold if you do not hurry." His brother Gregory waking him before he could venture any further in his dream. Perhaps that was a good thing. He needed to make a start on courting Pen before the end of the season if he was to have any chance of winning her over.

Joining the family for breakfast, he found that he was the last to come to the table when usually he was one of the first. "Are you alright dear?" His Mother did not miss much.

"I just have a lot on my mind." He had no wish to worry his mother. He was thinking about taking some flowers over to Penelope but felt as though he should take something more. Since Eloise was seated beside him, he hoped she might have some insight. "Do you know what Pen's favourite flower is?"

"No idea." Eloise thought for a moment. "Should I know something like that?"

"Perhaps." Poor Penelope. Had they both paid so little attention to her?

"I believe her birthday is in April, Colin." Violet Bridgerton shot her son a knowing smile. "You may want to give her daisies and sweet peas."

He hadn't realised that he had spoken so loudly. "Thank you. I will see to that after breakfast." He had no idea what flowers had to do with when Pen's birthday was but at this point, he would take any suggestions at the moment.

Antony glanced down the table. "Or you could actually ask the lady herself." He rose from the table. "It took you long enough brother." He headed for his office. Engaged or not, Antony still took his responsibilities for the family very seriously.

"Does everyone know?" He glared at Eloise. He felt foolish enough over his behaviour towards Penelope.

"I did not say a word." Eloise looked highly offended. "You might want to turn your glare in the direction of the Featherington household. I understand Lady Featherington paid Mama a visit yesterday afternoon."

Colin groaned. He had been considering asking his mother and two of his sisters for assistance, but now it seemed the entire family was to have an opinion on the matter. "What did Lady Featherington have to say?" Nothing good would be his guess.

"She mentioned that you had come to her family's assistance on the evening of the Featherington ball." Violet watched her third born with great interest. "Also, that you were giving Penelope mixed messages regarding your intentions towards her."

"It was unintentional. I am attempting to rectify that." Colin squirmed under the gaze of the majority of his family. "I thought I would start with flowers, but I am not certain how much headway I can make before the end of the season." Especially since the end of the season was in a week.

"So, write to her." Francesca offered. "Were the two of you not writing to each other while you were travelling?" Usually the quiet one out of his four sisters, she had actually been the most helpful so far.

"She may not write back this time." Things were still so uncertain between the two of them.

"Then you have a week to convince her to." His Mother made it seem so simple. "I would suggest asking Penelope to dance at your brother's wedding at the end of the week."

That would not be a hardship. She was an excellent dancer. But dancing with her was what had started most of the trouble he was currently in. Finishing his breakfast, he made haste to obtain some flowers and made his first attempt to court Penelope Featherington.

To say Penelope was stunned to see him bearing flowers for both her and Portia was an understatement. Portia on the other hand appeared thrilled. Almost as though he were there to court her instead of her daughter.

"What are you doing?" She looked at the flowers as though they were a large spider.

"I am courting you." Perhaps she didn't like daisies or sweet peas. "Are the flowers not to your liking?" He should have gone with something more spectacular. Although flashy wasn't really Pen's style. It was more her mother's.

"They are lovely, but why are you courting me? You specifically said you would never court me" So she didn't believe him when he had told her that he had only said it to dissuade other suitors. At least she had finally accepted the flowers.

"I was thinking ahead, but who am I to deprive you of being courted." He was grateful when Portia took both bunches of flowers and went to put them in water. He moved closer to Penelope. "You consumed my dreams last night."

"Am I supposed to apologize for that?" Penelope's eyes widened. "What exactly was I doing in these dreams?"

Colin shot her a wicked smile. "Your Mother could come back at any moment. It would be improper to say." He couldn't resist teasing her when she blushed. "But you were incredible, not that I am surprised considering how you kiss."

Penelope looked over in the direction her mother had gone. "You kissed me."

"You kissed me back." Colin was grateful that Portia was taking her time. "Antony is going to be married at the end of the week. Would you grant me the honour of a dance?" If he had his way, he would be taking all her dances.

"But people will see you." Penelope seemed to be bracing herself for further rejection. "They will think we are more than friends and that you lied to them when you said you would never court me."

"I was lying to myself. And you are so much more than a friend. So will you honour me with a dance?" Even if she refused, he would be back here tomorrow and each day after to keep trying.

It seemed a lifetime before she gave him a hesitant nod. "You still have time to change your mind. I doubt Mama would be surprised if you did."

"I will not be changing my mind." Finally, he was making some progress. "Would you take a walk with me? I'm sure Francesca will come with us." Eloise had disappeared by the time he returned from fetching the flowers.

There was still the look of someone waiting for the other shoe to drop on Penelope's pretty face. She nodded regardless and went to fetch her cloak. At least with Francesca joining them, they would have a chance to talk without interruption. Then he could find out more about Penelope. Since it was now incredibly clear that there was more to her than met the eye.