The Amazing Thing About: Trust. Chapter thirty-one.

It felt like there was a hole punched through her chest when she woke up the next morning to someone shaking her shoulder. Opening her eyes was the hardest part. In her dreams she'd been with Victor. He'd been smiling and holding her close. They were laughing about something but she couldn't recall what it was. In fact as she lay there bits and pieces of her dream began to fade. She tried to hold on to them but it was hopeless. When she finally cracked her eyes open all that was left was the lingering memory of his eyes. They'd turned from happy and full to lifeless, staring up at nothing.

Nothing felt real and she didn't know if she was truly awake or not. She vaguely recalled Lee making her drink something before she'd fallen asleep. It was no doubt a sleeping drought as there was no way she could have slept without it. Eliza was grateful her dreams had treated her so well giving her something good to latch onto. If reality hadn't ripped it away from her at the very end she could have pretended for a little longer.

At some point in the night George moved and she was curled up around a pillow, clutching it to her tightly. She lifted her head and looked down at it to see it soaked with tears and she felt entirely dehydrated. She sat up fully and looked around the workshop. She was glad they'd brought her here instead of making her return to the dorms. She didn't want to think about what that could have been like. Hannah and Kelly would be there but so would the rest of the girls in their dorm.

"Iz." Lee was crouching next to her. Other than him the room was empty and she pushed her hair out of her face. For some reason it registered with her that her hair was a mess and she pulled it free of the bun to fix it and put it in some semblance of neatness. Victor liked when she wore her hair up. He's said it made it easier for him to see her pretty face. She struggled with some of the tangles but once she was finished she let out a breath of relief. For some reason the idea of not being able to fix her hair sent panic rising up in her chest as the seconds ticked on.

Lee was watching her and she stared right back. It was like no words needed to pass between them and he nodded to himself as if satisfied that she wasn't going to snap and go crazy. As much of a concern as that was she didn't feel like she had it in her. She didn't feel much of anything actually. She'd thought she'd known numbness before but that was nothing compared to the void she felt now.

Her attention was pulled to the door as Fred and George entered. Neither one of them looked like they'd slept a wink. They both stopped at the sight of her awake and she wished she had something she could say to erase the looks on their faces. How many times was she going to have to see their expressions grim? It was bad enough that she was sure Fred had cried but to see that he wasn't even bothering to put up a facade? It made her drop her gaze to the side.

Fred came to a stop next to her and she glanced up to see his hand extended to help her up but she refused. She didn't even need to look at their faces to know they were hesitant to let her do it on her own as she got to her feet. Her body felt like a dead weight but she focused on moving one limb at a time. Being weak wasn't something she could afford right now. It would only give Connor what he wanted. So though her body didn't want to cooperate she forced it.

"Thirsty" She said and she flinched at the way her voice sounded so broken. She clenched her jaw and Lee handed her some water which she drank quickly. Her stomach flipped as she chugged it down but she refused to throw it up like her body wanted to. She thanked him quietly and her throat felt a little better but after the way she'd wailed and screamed it was going to take some time for her vocal cords to heal.

George spoke up from the entrance where he hadn't moved from. "Your parents are here." She wondered if he was keeping his distance due to the way she'd clung to him the night before. Was he afraid if he were to get too close she'd refuse to let go again?

"Where?" She asked though she had a pretty good idea. As long as they weren't right outside it would give her time to collect her muddled thoughts. The night before was a jumbled mess. Some parts were fuzzy at best and she couldn't help but feel like some of it had gone from her memory altogether. There was something familiar about it and she recalled her sessions with her old counselor.

"Dumbledore's office." George said and she nodded. As much as it sounded good to just sit back down and try to put her mind back together she didn't think she'd have enough time in the world for that. She pulled Fred's robe from around her and tossed it his way. Her joints felt stiff as she stretched, a side effect of sleeping on the floor.

She headed for the door and George stepped aside for her. "Let's get this over with." She said knowing she was about to be in for a very long questioning process. They walked with her and she kept her head down the entire way. With each step she was brought closer to her parents and she ran through all the possible scenarios in her mind. Would they be mad at her for sneaking off with Victor? Would they say that they'd been right in not wanting her to return to school? They'd been right. She hadn't been able to see it then but now it was clear.

George attempted to put his arm around her along the way and it broke her from her thoughts. So he wasn't afraid to touch her. Would she have been able to blame him if he was? There was a brief notion in her head that touching her was to curse oneself if she really thought about it. To associate with her was to play a game with ones life wasn't it? Eliza removed his arm from around her and put a bit of distance between them. Out of the corner of her eye she could see the muscles in his jaw clench but he didn't say anything.

Eliza considered it bad luck that they just so happened to pass Malfoy and his usual group. There hadn't been a person they'd passed that didn't stop to stare or whisper. She knew better than to think they'd spare her from their usual quips and she steeled herself. Her hands felt weak as she balled them into fists considering letting one fly if one said the wrong thing. It wasn't in her character at all but then again she wasn't sure what her character even was at that moment. What did it matter anymore?

"Do you think she killed him?" One of them said. There it was. The wrong thing she'd been waiting on but as they approached there was something about the look on Draco's face that kept her from turning on them. One of the others muttered "She's got the temper for it." But her hands released when she heard Malfoy tell them she didn't have what it took to kill anyone. That she was too soft.

She slid her gaze his way as she passed and he met her gaze for a split second and she wondered if he'd done that for her benefit. It wasn't like him whatsoever but maybe he'd spoken out of self-preservation. She wasn't alone, after all. She may not have posed much of a threat by herself but with the tension in the air she didn't think it would take much for a fight to break out with emotions running so high.

"We'll wait." Lee said as they approached the door that may have been the gate to hell itself in Eliza's mind. She wanted to tell them they didn't have to but instead she just set her hand on the doorknob and took a deep breath.

Inside Dumbledore's office her mother rushed forward and wrapped her in her arms. Eliza had barely gotten a few steps inside. "Oh, honey." She sounded like she was on the verge of tears and the sound of it made her hesitate. It took her a few long moments to hug her back, her arms feeling like they belonged to someone else as she held on as tight as she could.

Over her shoulder she could see her father sitting with Victor's parents. Eliza hadn't realized how much she'd missed her mom and dad until that moment and she wanted to tell them but seeing the others in the room it felt disrespectful to even be hugging her mother so she backed away from her. They no longer had a child to hold. It wasn't right to shove that in their faces.

"Eliza. I know this is hard but we have some questions." Dumbledore's voice was soft and he sounded tired. Between what had happened with Victor and Cedric the headmaster was dealing with far more than she could comprehend. Had he just had to do this same thing with Harry and Cedric's parents? Her mind wandered to Cas but she wasn't brave enough to ask about her when there were other things that needed to be addressed.

Eliza took a seat in one of the chairs, slowly lowering herself into it and trying to keep her eyes on the headmaster's desk in front of her. Her dad rose from his place and came to stand at her side, his hand on her shoulder making her twitch a bit. Having her parents with her in this office again brought back memories of their last time. She'd thought things were grave then. It was almost laughable.

The questions asked were done so with no accusation but with each answer she gave it felt like she was digging her own grave. Some of them she couldn't answer like how Connor could have gotten onto the grounds. They'd ruled out polyjuice potion so it wasn't as if he'd used the same trick twice but Eliza didn't know how he'd done it. He'd said very little or she couldn't remember it all. The way her memory was playing around with the events it was entirely possible that he'd given himself away. She just wished she could tell them.

Each question she could answer she did so but they didn't come easy with her throat raw and her voice broken. It hurt sometimes but she pushed through and declined breaks when they were offered.

Once Dumbledore seemed satisfied with her answer Eliza hoped she could go home with her parents. She wanted to lock herself in her room and curl up under her blankets but it seemed fate was a cruel mistress. As she sat there waiting to be dismissed Victor's father stood from his seat and came to stand next to her. Eliza felt guilt twist in her gut and she couldn't meet his gaze as he began to apologize to her.

How could he be apologizing? He spoke of saying things that he didn't mean due to grief and she felt the ground beneath her crumbling as he told her that his son's death wasn't her fault. Her eyes stung but she couldn't bring herself to cry. Victor's mother was next and she said that Victor talked about her in his letters. That he'd wanted them to meet. How bittersweet it was that their meeting was in such a fashion.

As the woman spoke Eliza could feel the weight of the pendant on her chest. It felt like an anchor hanging around her neck and she slowly reached behind her, unclasping it. The moment she did she felt exposed and vulnerable. She'd become so used to having it as a constant reminder that she had someone who felt so deeply for her. But it had been an heirloom and it didn't belong with her.

Eliza offered it to his mother, eyes downcast. The woman covered her mouth to stifle a sob before taking Eliza's hand and closing it around the necklace and shaking her head. "If he gave it to you then I want you to keep it." She said and Eliza felt like she was drowning. The numbness was giving way to anguish at the way the woman spoke to her. "I trust my son knew what he was doing when he gave that to you." Her husband said and Eliza couldn't move as they left the office.

Eliza stood there staring down at the necklace as her parents asked Dumbledore about the rumors about Voldemort returning. She didn't know what they were talking about but there seemed to be a heaviness to the room. If it weren't for her father taking her under his arm Eliza could have stood there forever just letting the world move by without her.

"This puts us in a difficult position." He said. Eliza looked up at him. Her father's face was grave and she frowned. What was going on? Was there more to the already climbing number of troubles? How much more could be piled on before it all collapsed? She looked at her mother and she wasn't the worried mom at the moment. She was her dad's right hand. Her expression spoke of business.

"I understand. I can only assure you that she will be under constant watch in her remaining time here." Dumbledore said. What? Who? He couldn't be talking about her. She didn't need to be watched because she was going home with her parents. Wasn't she? Eliza tugged on her father's sleeve much like a child and asked him what was going on.

To have her dad have to sit her down and explain to her once again that she couldn't come with them made her world feel gray. He said that there were bigger things in motion and that they needed to return to work. That she had to stay until the end of the year for her own safety. Eliza wanted to argue. She wanted to fight but what could she say to them? Their jobs were important, more so now than ever before if what Dumbledore said was true.

Eyes locked on her hands in her lap Eliza said nothing as her father kissed her on the forehead. They were leaving her behind again. The child in her wanted to scream and kick at their feet but she knew they were only trying to do the right thing. "We're trusting you, Albus." Her mother sounded as if she were threatening him before she kissed Eliza on the cheek. "You'll be home soon, baby." She promised.

Eliza wanted to tell her she loved her too but the last word she'd said had set something off.

One down, baby.

She remembered seeing Connor looking down at her before her vision blacked out. While she'd already voiced her concerns that Connor wasn't going to stop with Victor there was something about reliving that moment that made her bite down on the inside of her cheek until she could taste blood. Eliza kept her mouth shut and just swallowed down on the pain knowing her parents couldn't wait around. Every moment they spent with her Voldemort was getting stronger.

Eliza could swear she could hear her father say something as he left and she remembered that her friends had said they'd stay. As the door closed and she was left alone with Dumbledore she wondered what they were saying to one another. It was a fleeting thought that was taken over by the question that was plaguing her.

"Where is Cas?" She finally asked.

Dumbledore came to stand beside her, his hands clasped behind his back. "She is returning home with her parents." He said. Eliza wished she could see her but what would she say if she did? That she was sorry? Words felt cheap. The headmaster was looking down at her as he spoke next. "You fought him." He said simply and Eliza was pulled back to her encounter with Connor.

She slowly nodded. She hadn't been able to recall everything about their exchange but she'd explained how she'd tried to keep Connor away from Victor's body.

"That was very brave." His tone was soft as he placed a hand on her shoulder. The touch made her wish people would stop doing that. They were trying to reassure her. She didn't feel like she deserved it. "I couldn't save him." She felt herself hunch a bit, her shoulders curling in as if to guard herself against the pain of admitting her shortcomings.

The headmaster removed his hand and Eliza felt herself relax a little. He was a strong, wise man and he was calling her brave. Didn't he see that she'd been the cause of all of this? "I doubt there was anything you could have done to save him."

"I could have left him alone." Eliza muttered.

There was a pregnant pause and Dumbledore let out a quiet sigh. "Young love is a powerful thing." He said. "It clouds our judgment and causes us to act on impulse." He moved away from her to fiddle with something on his desk. To Eliza it looked like he was struggling to find something to say. "Sometimes it ends in tragedy." His eyes flickered her way.

Eliza felt her heart sink in her chest at his words. "I'm a danger to those around me." She said.

It was odd that the man could manage the small huff of a laugh. "You are not. Mr. Wardell is another story."

She failed to see the humor in the situation and her brow furrowed. "He's not going to stop." Did no one understand that? Why did it seem like everyone was just brushing aside the big picture?

"I fear you're right." The man said and she felt the tension building in her chest unravel a bit. So it wasn't being ignored but it was being downplayed. So Eliza chose to express her inner thoughts and told him that she shouldn't return to the school. It was strange how she'd fought her parents to come back and yet now she was ready to fight to leave it and never come back. "I don't believe that would dissuade him. With or without you here I don't think he's going to alter his path. Only his methods."

That left her grasping for straws. "What should I do?"

"There are those who think I have all the answers and it is at times like this that I wish it were true."

"Is there anything I CAN do?"

There was a heaviness in his gaze when he leveled it on her again. She waited with bated breath for some scrap of advice. Some wisdom he could impart for her to latch onto.

"You can fight."

Outside the office, Mrs. Weasley was with her sons. Fred had his arm around her as she spoke in a hushed tone and Eliza noticed she looked like she'd been crying. It felt like she was intruding on a family moment as she stood awkwardly as the door closed behind her.

Lee cleared his throat after noticing her and Mrs. Weasley looked her way. She sucked in a breath before rushing toward Eliza and embracing her. Her hug was warm and meant to be a comfort but she struggled to return it. Where once hugs and holding were a comfort it now felt like a betrayal. Something inside of her curled up in fear at the loving nature of the woman.

"How's Harry?" Eliza asked when she broke away from the woman. He deserved the support and love now more than she did. His ordeal had been far worse than hers. He'd face down the man who'd murdered his parents and wanted him dead. Her worries extended to him and it helped her push her own to the back of her mind.

For the next week time had no meaning. Sometimes she would just be stuck sitting in the same spot for hours but it felt like only seconds passed. Kelly and Hannah would often sit with her until she fell asleep and she would wake with a blanket draped over her. Other times they would take her up to bed. She'd zone out for so long that sometimes it felt like she'd blinked and day had turned to night. Yet in her bed was when it froze. When she was trapped in the dark staring up at the ceiling waiting for sleep to come it evaded her and the seconds dragged on mocking her.

She avoided meals for the most part. She'd tried to go to the great hall a few times but it was so loud until it wasn't. There were too many eyes and too many whispers. If it wasn't for Harry she'd have felt all alone. It was him that brought her around after a few days. He understood and it was nice to have him around just so she had someone to relate to even if they didn't talk much.

Fred, George, and Lee tried to make her smile but their attempts were half-hearted as if they knew it was hopeless. She was grateful for the moments that they would try but the school had a cloud hanging over it. Students and teachers alike had the same air about them. It was a mournful thing and though some tried to go about their days there was no getting away from the thick grief that settled over the grounds.

In those days Eliza thought about a great many things. While Victor was the majority she also thought about herself. How she was going to deal with this and move on. Could she? He wouldn't want her to dwell. Connor would want her to. Her necklace had become a worry stone for her and whenever she would sit and think she rubbed the pendant between her thumb and index finger. It grounded her and kept her from wandering too far away.

Everywhere she went in the castle she was watched. Eliza felt that Connor had accomplished what he'd set out to do that year and she didn't think she'd see him again but there was no concrete evidence of that. She wanted to know how he'd gotten to her this time. How he'd gotten onto the grounds without anyone noticing. There was something that kept playing at the back of her mind. It was a sound. A crow. A laughing crow. She couldn't tell if she'd imagined it but it nagged at her. Sometimes it would wake her from her sleep. Often it was accompanied by his smirking face.

She was sitting with the twins and lee on the grounds when she turned to Fred and asked him if he'd ever heard a crow laugh before. The way he'd looked from her to his brother said he thought she'd lost her mind but she explained that she kept hearing it. That it felt important. That she'd heard it that night. She was sure of it. There was no reason for it to be stuck with her if she hadn't.

Fred ignored the laughing part. "You're saying you heard a crow after..?"

Eliza nodded, her gaze scanning the trees for any sign of the same bird that haunted her. "The Yule Ball. There was a crow when he gave me the necklace." Eliza muttered as she tried to recall each and every time she'd seen one. "And then Rikki attacked one during the second task." The way her ferret had reacted was hard to forget.

Fred frowned and he was quiet for a moment. "The night we checked out the maze..I thought I saw a person but it was a bird." He said before his brow furrowed. "A crow."

A heavy silence followed before there came a caw in the distance and Eliza jumped. The sound of the bird would forever be engrained in her mind as an omen of death. "Do you think he could be an animagus?" Lee's question was quiet.

There was a sudden understanding then that they didn't have to say out loud. It made sense. Connor could be anywhere. Crows were such common birds on the grounds and they were rarely alone. He could blend in with a flock and be watching them at any moment. He could be in the trees now. What were they going to do? Start firing spells at crows any time they saw or heard one?

Eliza hugged Rikki to her. He'd known and she'd locked him up for protecting her.