Hello and thank you for clicking on this story!

Before you get to read it, I want to explain what inspired me to write it, so this is going to be the longest author's note I have ever written.

A few months ago, I saw an interview with Jim and Mayim where they talked about all the Shamy relationship moments during season six. I know I am late to the party and most of you have probably known this interview for years, but I was surprised (and intrigued) to hear that in the Valentine's Day episode (you know, the one where Sheldon made Amy his emergency contact), in an earlier version of the script, there was a Shamy kiss planned. They did not say who would have initiated this kiss but you can't blame me for wanting it to be Sheldon, can you?

Of course, my weird, Shamy-obsessed mind started to dream up possibilities of how their relationship could have evolved differently and how it could have affected the events of the show from there on.

Because I like to experiment with "What if"-scenarios I decided to take the opportunity and write a side story about Leonard and Penny breaking up and exploring life without each other for a while. I know I am taking a risk here because most people who like Shamy also like Lenny (as do I, believe it or not!) but I hope you will trust me enough to keep reading. This will not in any way bash the characters or their relationship, just explore some things that could have been.

This story will still focus mainly on Shamy and how they will be affected by the changes around them but if you ship Lenny and, in order to enjoy this story, need to know if they eventually get back together, you can write me a private message and I will give you the answer to ONLY this question.

So, what you can expect is: Lots and lots of slow burning (we're talking about 'Season-Six-Sheldon' after all) Shamy fluff (which will turn very M-rated later in this story) as they make their way to physical and emotional intimacy, starting with the aforementioned episode and spanning over a rather long time. Most events that happened on the show will happen in this story too. Some for different reasons, some will have a different meaning and a lot of them with a very different outcome. If you find some parts of it a little out of character (I promise, I did my best to keep things realistic), I hope you can forgive me for the wishful thinking.

As a side storyline there will be Leonard and Penny exploring life without each other and especially Penny trying to figure out what she wants in life.

If I am being honest, I initially only wrote this story for myself and did not even plan to publish it here. But a very good friend read the whole thing (containing 32 chapters, although as always, that number could change due to editing) and convinced me to give it a shot. I hope she is right and at least some of you will enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

I am posting only the Prologue today. It is really is more a prelude of what's to come and uses a lot of dialogue from the show, but I hope it will spark your interest for the first 'real' chapter that will be published soon.

Updates will be on Wednesdays and Saturdays, as usual.

I hope I did not scare you off with this really, really long author's note (I promise I will keep it shorter from now on).

As always, reviews are very much appreciated!

More Than Anything

Prologue

Sheldon

Sheldon sighed deeply as he entered the living room, dressed in his best date-night clothes.

Why did he ever agree to this?

There were so much better ways to spend an evening.

It was Thursday for Christ's sake. Pizza night. And here he was, being forced to dress up and go out to a fancy, overprized restaurant.

And for what? To spend time with his girlfriend?

He had to admit, he usually enjoyed spending time with her. Discussing science, playing games, going to the zoo.

But not this. This hippy dippy romance stuff she made him do. She would certainly expect him to hold her hand tonight and say something meaningful and from the heart again.

Why from his heart when his mind was so much more interesting?

He heard a knock at the door and sighed again.

Welcome to an uncomfortable evening.

He opened the door to be greeted with a friendly "Hello."

"Hello.", he replied. He looked at her for a moment. She looked surprisingly like herself. No fancy dress. No tons of make-up.

Just her with her green cardigan and her black handbag. Just like every other much more enjoyable night. But she could not fool him.

"Happy Valentine's Day.", she said, smiling slightly.

Here we go.

"M'kay.", he replied, not even trying to hide the fact that he was not happy about this.

"Shall we… go to dinner?", he added, trying to get this whole evening over with.

"Hang on.", she walked past him, and he could only look at her a little confused.

"As you know, I had planned a traditional evening of romance and gifts."

Of course, he knew that. Why was she stalling? Why drag this out any longer.

There was no need to beat around the bush. She knew full well what she was doing to him with this night.

"Yes.", he replied slightly annoyed. "And as you know I planned to pretend to enjoy it."

He could see her smile a little. Ugh, why did she enjoy his pain so much?

"I've been working on this expression all day.", he added then and smiled at her the way he had been practicing.

"And I appreciate your effort.", she removed her handbag and put it on the chair. "But upon contemplation I decided I was being selfish, so I cancelled our dinner reservation and came up with an even better way to celebrate Valentine's Day."

He stared at her. The beginning of her sentence had sounded promising. But he was a little scared of what she would think of as 'a better way' to celebrate.

"What is that?", he asked a little wearily, worried about the big smile that was spreading on her face.

"By doing none of it.", she looked proud of herself. "No dinner, no romance, no gifts. We stay here, order pizza and watch one of your beloved Star Wars… Trek… things."

By then she had sat down on the couch. He blinked at her disbelievingly. "Really?", he asked, trying to figure out if there could be any catch.

But she looked sincere. "Well, that's what you would love, isn't it?"

"More than anything.", he answered honestly. His heart started beating faster. Could it be? Would this actually not be a horrendous night?

"Well then…", she patted on his spot on the couch. "That's what we'll do."

"Wha…", he quickly closed the door before she could change her mind. "I don't know what to say. This is the most thoughtful gift that anyone has ever given me. And that's including an amazing gift I gave myself earlier today."

Maybe he should have gifted her the signed drawing of the brain cell after all.

He sat down close to her. He couldn't be sure because of all the layers he was wearing, but it felt like he had goosebumps on his arms.

He couldn't believe it. He did not have to go to an overpriced, fancy restaurant after all to celebrate this preposterous holiday like Howard and Leonard were being made to right now.

And at the same time, he did not have to attend a pathetic party full of sad guys with Raj. Because he still had something that those sad guys did not have.

"I'm your girlfriend. That's my job.", she continued and it made his heart jump in his chest.

My girlfriend. Mine.

He was overcome with emotions he couldn't specify at the moment.

He didn't think about his next actions. Before she could say another word, he reached for her shoulders and pressed his lips to hers.

Amy

Fascinating.

Ironically this was the first word that came to mind, when she felt Sheldon's lips on hers.

It was fascinating, being kissed by him.

She had no idea where to put her hands. And she was too shocked to kiss him back. Also, it was over way too soon.

Inadvertently, she put her fingers on her lips as if to try and contain the feeling of his lips on hers.

"You… you kissed me.", she stuttered.

Sheldon was staring at her as if he was seeing her for the very first time. "I… I did.", he answered.

"Uhm… this... this was nice.", she offered.

"Good.", he breathed out.

She smiled at him and felt tears welling up in her eyes. "Sh… Sheldon.", she stammered.

He shook his head and seemed to snap out of this special moment.

"Well, enough of this. Stop ruining Valentine's Day and order my pizza."

She chuckled. She had fantasized about Sheldon kissing her for the first time willingly.

Vividly.

But she guessed, this was better. Not as romantic, but more real.

"Alright. Go pick a movie while I make the call."

Sheldon

He exhaled relieved and settled in next to her on the couch.

What was that just now? How did it happen?

Had he really just kissed her? That did not seem like him at all. He needed to analyze the situation.

Her lips were softer than expected and he had felt something in his stomach. Something weird. But not entirely unpleasant.

It had not been all that bad, kissing Amy.

He made a mental note to figure out what to do with this new information. But not now. There was no time.

As Amy had requested, he put in the movie. It was one of his favorites. But something was missing.

"Are you not making me hold your hand?", he asked surprised.

She glanced at him. "I promised you, no romance. Unless… you want to?"

He thought about it. Did he want to?

No, he really was no fan of handholding. And most certainly not for the duration of a whole movie. He crinkled up his nose. The sweat. The germs.

But maybe he could try something else. It was the least he could do after all the things she did not make him do.

Carefully as not to startle her, he put his arm around her and rested his hand on her shoulder.

She stiffened for a second, but then she beamed at him, and he could feel her relax and lean closer to him.

Yes, this was okay. He could live with this. It was better than holding a sweaty hand and it seemed to make her happy.

Amy

If she had known that to get a little affection from Sheldon all she had to do was cancelling all the traditional romance stuff, she would have done that much, much sooner.

She could hardly focus on the movie, as she was relishing being held by him.

Granted, it was a little awkward, sitting in this position, almost afraid to move. And she did not know if it was comfortable for Sheldon, bending his arm like this.

But it was a start. And more than she had hoped for tonight.

After the movie, he insisted on giving her the gift he had planned for her, even when she told him he did not have to.

She couldn't believe it. He made her his emergency contact. He trusted her with something this important. This was big!

Then, they said their good-byes and he walked her to his door. She lingered a little longer in the doorway, hoping for another kiss, but Sheldon seemed oblivious.

But that was okay. She knew how his brain worked. He would process this and when he had, hopefully he would decide that he liked it. And then they would sit down and he would create another amendment to their relationship agreement.

Oh, please let him figure out he liked it… It would be a paradigm shift in their relationship. A big one.

She closed the door behind her as she left and leaned against it. Then she sighed. She closed her eyes and tried to burn every second of him kissing her into her brain. In case it would be the last time after all.

But she was interrupted by two people stomping up the stairs.

As fast as she could, she ran past Penny's door up a few stairs. She made it just in time to witness Penny storming into her apartment, only for Leonard to go after her and slamming the door behind him.

They both seemed so angry. She didn't even have to stand close to the door to hear the conversation that followed.

Leonard

He had thought about letting it go. He almost went into his own apartment to cool down. But he was furious with her. For once, he needed to confront her.

"You know what? That was pretty crappy of you. I mean, all I wanted to do was give you a great night and it's like you, you went out of your way to destroy it."

"Yep. I know. I'm a total bitch."

She did not even look at him. She did not apologize.

"I am not saying that.", he mumbled.

"Well, I am." Still no apology. Maybe she was right after all.

"Ah, fine, you win. You're a bitch. Why couldn't we just have a nice time?"

He had tried so hard. He had wanted this night to be perfect. The first Valentine's Day after she told him she loved him.

He thought things would change. That was the worst part about this. That even after she admitted her feelings for him, he still felt like her consolation price. Like she was just settling for him.

"I don't know. Maybe because things are going so well between us lately and I've been really happy."

Wait what? That's how she showed her happiness?

"Okay. You're going to have to make a lot more sense than that."

Penny sighed. "Obviously, I have some commitment issues."

He had to fight the urge to scoff at her.

"Glaringly obvious. Go on."

She sighed again.

"As long as things keep going great between us, you'll keep asking me to marry you and eventually I'm going to end up saying yes. Then we're going to be married forever and the whole thing just freaks me out."

He blinked at her. He tried to understand. He really did.

But all he could think about was that he was not enough for her. Not even when she admitted that things were going well between them. He would probably never be enough.

"Okay. I know I propose a lot… so how about this? I promise, I will never ask you to marry me again."

She looked up to him alarmed.

"What? What do you mean? Are you breaking up with me?"

He took a deep breath and looked at her. She looked so beautiful in her red dress. For so many years, he had wanted her. He still did. And he probably always would. He had been willing to do almost anything to be her boyfriend. She was it. The embodiment of all his dreams. He would never find another like her.

So, he could hardly believe the next word that left his lips.

"Yes."

Penny

What?

She could feel her lips moving, but she had trouble forming even one word.

She knew she had not treated him well this night. But Leonard wouldn't break up with her over this. Would he?

"Are… are you serious?", she stuttered.

He turned away from her. This was bad.

"I am.", he mumbled. "I'm sorry, Penny. I can't do this anymore. If it hadn't been before, this night made it perfectly clear that you and I have different goals for this relationship. I can't keep begging you."

Her lips trembled. "But I never wanted you to beg.", she argued.

"No.", he turned around again. He looked hurt. "You just wanted me to stay in this weird limbo we're in. Penny, we've been dating on and off for years now. You don't want me to move in with you. You don't want me to propose. You can't even focus on me when we're supposed to have a romantic evening. I love you, Penny. But I can't go on like this."

No. This could not be happening.

"I'm sorry for tonight, Leonard. I really am."

He just shook his head.

"If this was just about tonight, we could get past it. But it's not. Penny, you always do this. You treat me as if I am wrong for having such strong feelings for you. As if me wanting to move forward with you was a bad thing. Maybe I've wanted all this too much. Maybe this is not fair to you. But I am done asking. I am done trying to make you do things you clearly don't want. I love you Penny, but… This… it's over. I need it to be over. I'm sorry."

With that, he left, and she could just stare at the spot on the floor where he stood just seconds before.

She snapped out of her frozen state and went to her kitchen to open a bottle of wine. She emptied her first glass in seconds.

No… no this did not just happen. She did not know how to feel. Except shocked.

Someone knocked at her door.

She almost jumped. Oh, thank God. Leonard must have realized his mistake already. She knew he would come back. No way he would ever break up with her for real.

But the bespectacled face that showed up at her door did not belong to her boyfriend… or ex-boyfriend.

"Hey, bestie." It was Amy's voice, full of pity, that finally made her realize the gravity of the situation.

"He… he broke up with me.", she whispered, still in shock.

It only took a second for Amy to be at her side and hug her tightly.

"I heard.", she admitted. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No.", Penny shook her head. "What I want is to get wasted and forget about this horrible night."

Amy nodded and let go of her.

She did not accept a glass though.

"No. I still have to drive home. But I'll stay while you drink, and I'll be there if you want to talk at some point."

Grateful, Penny refilled her glass and sat down on her couch next to her friend.

"I'll need a lot more wine before I start talking."

"That's okay.", Amy replied chuckling.

Penny took a good look at her. Somehow, she seemed to be in a very good mood.

"I'll probably puke.", she warned her.

"And I'll hold your hair." Amy was still smiling.

Okay, this was getting suspicious.

"Amy?", she asked, craving a distraction from the horrible things she was feeling right now. "Something happened with you tonight. Spill."

And Amy did.

Penny could not believe it. Only recently, Sheldon had admitted that he might someday have a physical relationship with Amy. And it seemed, he was slowly starting to make good on his promise.

Very slowly. But judging by Amy's exceptionally good mood, the pace did not bother her.

Sadness crept up her spine. She used to think of herself and Leonard as the big love story within their group of friends. And she hated to admit it, but she used to ridicule Amy's relationship with Sheldon.

But as it had become apparent over the years, they were really good together. However odd it sometimes seemed, it turned out, they made each other happy.

Only hours ago, she would have said the same thing about her own relationship. But apparently, she had been wrong about that.

Taking another big gulp of her wine, while listening to Amy recount every detail of her night, she wondered, if this was really it.

Would Leonard reconsider breaking up with her? Did she even want him too? She was not sure anymore. Just like on many other occasions, she realized, she had no idea what she really wanted.

Next on "More Than Anything":

Leonard and Penny try to deal with being broken up in different ways. Old and new friends come to Penny's support as she takes the stage. And as he begins to understand what led to his friends' breakup, Sheldon asks himself if he should be worrying about his own relationship.