That's how their "friendship" remained the next month. She found that she she missed him terribly and their short polite chats when they happened to run into each other were no longer enough for her.
She found herself a bit more objective than she was in the heat of the moment. So what? They'd seen each other naked (and then some). They were both adults. They were certainly not strangers to seeing each other at their worst. Looking back, perhaps her own insecurities warped her impression of what Elliot had been thinking. Was he seeing her "worst?" Is it possible that he was really interested? That those eyes held arousal and love rather than pity and disgust? He'd actively gone over to her and tried to…help her? Perhaps his whispers were sounds of devotion and not revulsion.
Enough was enough. She wanted her friend back. She also wanted other things that while she wasn't quite ready to admit, she was no longer denying it either.
Sitting at work, at 6:30 on a Friday night, with Noah at a weekend dance camp, she was anticipating a long weekend alone with her thoughts. Suddenly she felt the burning need to not be alone. Impulsively, not giving herself time to second guess it, she picked up her phone and opened her texts.
"Hello, it's been awhile, how have you been?" Way too formal. She backspaced.
"Howdy partner!" Nah. Too peppy for their current state.
"Hey partner, are you busy?" That could work. Send.
Almost immediately her phone rang and it was Elliot.
"I'm never too busy for you, partner" he replied.
"I know it's been a hell of a few months. I thought maybe we can grab some dinner and …talk. If you want…Unless you have family plans. I don't want to take you away from what little free time you have with them…"
"Olivia," he interrupted her rambling, "I'd love to have dinner with you. I can't tell you how happy I am to hear from you…I've….I've missed you Liv. So damn much."
Tears gathered in her eyes. She loved this man and the connection she felt toward him had yet to sever. Even 10 years gone, ghosted and left to face pure evil all alone it remained. Even with him catching her in such a vulnerable and embarrassing state it remained. Nothing removed his hold on her heart, though she had tried more than once to pry it off.
She inhaled and closed her eyes against the tears. "I missed you too, El. I'm sorry…I may have overreacted..I just…"
"No, Olivia. I'm sorry. Hurting you any more than I already have kills me…"
"El, it's ok, really. I mean I'm beyond embarrassed but I know you didn't mean to invade my privacy. Let's move on, really….Noah and I usually order pizza on Friday nights and watch movies. He's away this weekend, but maybe you'd want to come over and we can…talk…about whatever you want."
"I'd love to, Liv. Let me pick up the pizza and I'll be at your place as soon as possible. It's been slow here…
"Don't jinx it," she joked.
"I'm just getting ready to leave. I'll be there soon."
"OK, sounds good. I'll see you then. You remember where it is?" she joked.
Arriving home, Olivia immediately went to freshen up. She didn't want to wear her formal and boxy work clothes. At her job she actively worked to hide her figure. For Elliot…She opted for something casual yet fitted. Black leggings, a form fitting tank, and a light cream colored cardigan. She touched up her makeup and hair, ignoring the voice taunting her "Who are you getting dolled up for?" "For my partner," she fought back.
An hour passed and Elliot found himself standing outside her apartment and just like last time, another resident was coming out. However, Elliot made sure to call on the intercom. Olivia buzzed him in and he rode the elevator up to her floor. Her door was cracked open but he wasn't taking any chances. He rapped his knuckles on the door and Olivia called out "Come in, Elliot!" Deja vu. As soon as he stepped through the door, he met eyes with Olivia, who was getting plates and silverware out. She realized what she just said and how it mirrored the last time he came over. Except this time, he was carrying pizza instead of tiramisu and she wasn't… They both shared an awkward laugh and just like that the tension was gone.
Dropping the pizza down onto her counter, Elliot sidled up to her. Giving her a sincere look, he said "I'm so happy to be here, I missed you so damn much" and took her hands in his. Looking into her eyes, he asked "Can I give the best partner in the world a hug?" "You brought Munch with you?," she joked.
Rather than answering, he released her hands from his and wrapped his arms around her. Connected from head to toe. Pressing his lips to the crown of her hair, he breathed in the scent that was uniquely Oliva and held her tight. He felt the warm tears on his shoulder and heard the catch of her breath.
Dinner was good. Comfortable. They chatted about the kids, griped about the job, and joked about epidemic of partners turned "partners" that was springing up. Fin and Phoebe, Rollins and Carrisi. "Maybe you should get back in touch with Munch," Elliot had teased.
As for Olivia, being back in sync with Elliot lifted a huge weight off her shoulders. As he washed the dishes, ordering her to sit and relax, she began to think. She knew then and there that she wanted more with him. She wanted a life. She wanted someone to send funny flirty messages to. Someone who would be at home, waiting for her with a hug and comfort when she had a bad day. Someone to pick up just the little of the slack from the things she's been caring alone for 5 decades. Someone to kiss her senseless and make Noah exclaim "Gross!" Large family dinners with the kids and grandkids that left the house a mess but their hearts full. Someone to fall asleep and wake up with. Someone that would make her feel good mentally, emotionally and physically.
Elliot…