Chapter 16: Until I see those tears

Makarov was snoring.

No, not in his own bed, but rather at the magic council Fiore branch building. Right in the middle of an important trial that would determine the fate of his guild.

The only problem was that the trial went on and on, so much so that Makarov couldn't help but fall asleep.

"Makarov! Cease this action immediately!" One of the magic council members, known as Master Org yelled.

Makarov blinked rapidly until his vision went into focus and he realized where he was. "Oh no, not at all." He desperately tried to wave it off as a joke but no one was stupid enough to believe that lie.

"Hmm. Despite your rudeness I have to sadly say that your guild is innocent. By all accounts of the evidence gathered it can be clearly seen that Phantom Lord was the aggressor in this incident. Your free to go, now leave before I change my mind!" A large mage hidden in the shadows that went by Crawford Seam spoke.

"You'd better thank me, Mabo. It was all thanks to my defense that you got off with just a simple scolding." A short statured man said.

"I'm in your debt, Yajima. You're a really good friend. Once the guild is rebuilt come by for a drink! The ramen's on me too!" Makarov replied.

"I want the special Fairy Ramen and don't forget the dozen slices of chashu pork!" Yajima replied.

"Greedy." Was all Makarov muttered under his breath, and Yajima pretended not to hear it.

Makarov sighed. "But again, thanks for the help."

"Don't overdo it anymore, hmm? You should have retired years ago. During the reports I heard you almost died. Please, I don't want to have to bury a friend. Don't become Rob." Yajima said sadly with regret in his voice.

Makarov glanced at his friend. "I can't promise you anything. But I do have one question."

"Hmm? What is it, Mabo?" Yajima replied.

"How did Jose know about Lucy?" Makarov said.

"When he was a wizard saint, he had access to most of the council's files besides the top secret. Although how he knew about her other magic is a mystery. We don't have much on Lucy, all we know is that she blew up a research facility almost two years ago." Yajima explained.

Makarov sighed. "I don't know how this will all work out; the poor girl Is in a coma."

"How did the guild take the news?" Yajima asked.

"Terribly. Everyone who got close to Lucy are a wreck and I had to stop Natsu from going on a rampage and burning down the town-twice." Makarov said.

Natsu was racing towards to Magnolia Hospital with Lucy cradled in his arms. It was only a few short seconds after the war with Phantom ended that Lucy stopped breathing.

At first, he thought she was dead, but only a moment later he heard her shallow breaths return. He could sense Erza and a few others chasing after him, but he would endure any beatings from the red head if it meant Lucy was safe.

Natsu finally made it to the hospital and kicked the doors down.

"Doctor! She's not breathing! I need a doctor!" Natsu shouted from the top of his lungs.

Three doctors rushed out and placed Lucy on a cot before wheeling her elsewhere. Just as one of the doctors was about to leave, Natsu clasped his hand on an older doctor's shoulder.

"Will she be okay?" Natsu asked, voice laced with worry.

"The doctor nodded his head and said; "Yes. We will try our best." Before running down the corridor.

Natsu heard footsteps approaching and Erza came up and knocked him over the head.

"What was that for?! You just run off with Lucy when she needs to see Porlyusica?!" Erza ranted.

Natsu didn't react in the loud, violent manner Erza was used to which worried her. She looked him in the eyes and saw the sheer anguish on his face.

In the calmest voice she could muster, she consoled Natsu the same way she did after Lisanna died.

"Tell me, what's wrong." Erza whispered.

"She stopped breathing…" Natsu murmured. "I didn't know what to do, so I just…I thought she was dead, Erza."

Erza embraced Natsu in a tight hug and let him let everything out. She wouldn't judge him for this, neither was Gray who looked quite shocked himself.

Mirajane fell to her knees in shock. "Even after everything…Lucy…she…"

Meanwhile, Master Makarov was speaking with the head nurse at the counter. "…Alright, I understand."

Makarov clapped his hands to get everyone's attention. "Listen up brats! Lucy is currently in intensive surgery. Her body was wrecked by the transformation Jose forced on her and the doctors are doing everything to save her life. The surgery will take eighteen to twenty-four hours, so I suggest you all go home and rest up. This isn't the environment you all need to be in."

"No. I'm sorry Gramps but I gotta stay, I gotta see if Lucy will make it through…" Natsu said, his voice horse and laced with sadness.

"Alright. If anyone wants to stay then stay, just don't go destroying anything." Makarov said.

Twenty-one hours. It took Twenty-one painstaking hours for the head surgeon, or at least what Natsu thought was the head surgeon to come into the waiting room. Natsu kept himself busy by counting the time on a clock hanging on the other side of the room, it was painful but at least it kept him distracted about Lucy.

The head surgeon took of his face mask and shed his gloves as he walked up to Makarov.

"Hello. It's good to see you all here." The head surgeon said.

Makarov jumped from his seat and stared at the surgeon. "So, tell me, what is her condition?"

"Well, it's quite grim. The muscles in her back, arms and legs are completely shredded. Furthermore, over seventy percent of the bones in her body are not only broken, but shattered into shards. We've done all we can to try and reconstruct her body, but there is nothing more we can do. She has been put into a medically induced coma so she can heal." The head surgeon said.

"How long will she be out for?" Makarov asked, voice filled with tension and worry.

"I don't know. The girl is lucky to even be alive and breathing in her condition. It could take two months or two years. We have to leave it up to the gods to decide." The head surgeon replied.

Makarov hummed in thought as he rubbed the stubble on his chin. "Thank you for all you have done to save the life of my child. May we see her?"

"Yes, but not for too long, she is still recovering after all. And not all at once either, just ten-minute visits too." The head surgeon said.

Relief flooded Natsu when he heard Lucy was alive. It was as if a large weight had lifted from his shoulders. "I-I want to see her first. Alone."

"I can't let you go alone, Natsu. I can't tell if you will have a rampage in the mental state you're in. Erza!" Makarov said.

"Yes, Master?" Erza replied.

"Go along with Natsu while he visits Lucy. Make sure he doesn't destroy anything." Makarov explained.

"Yes, Master." Erza replied.

Natsu hated the long walk through the hospital corridors to get to Lucy's room. His nose filled disinfectants and other germ killers. It was too unnatural, too fake. He should be smelling Lucy's familiar scent as they went on a mission together with Happy.

"We're here." Erza said quietly as she placed a hand on the doorknob.

Erza turned to Natsu. "Are you sure you can handle this? Seeing Lucy like this?" Erza asked, with worry evident in her tone.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Promise." Natsu murmured.

Erza nodded her head and slowly opened the door.

The sight he saw shocked him to his core. There was Lucy, lying in bed hooked up to various beeping lacrima powered machines. Both her arms and legs were mounted in slings while her broken bones healed. She was almost wrapped head to toe in bandages, and he saw they cut her hair. It used to rest near the small of her back, but now it barely reached her shoulders.

Natsu didn't realize he was growling until Erza squeezed his shoulder and told him to knock it out.

Erza took a seat on lucy's left side, while Natsu took the one on the right. Natsu strained his hearing. It was hard to hear her breathing with all the machines creating intruding noises, but it was there, almost as weak as before he brought her to the hospital, but it was slightly stronger.

Erza gently clasped Lucy's hand in her own as she told Lucy to wake up soon, saying how terrible she feels that she couldn't save her.

Natsu, Natsu was at a loss for words. He didn't know what to say and he sat there ln confusion for the majority of the time they were in Lucy's room.

Just as Erza informed Natsu their time was up, he finally decided what he would say. He leaned in close to her ear and whispered to her something only she could hear.

He only hoped she heard it.

Natsu glanced at Makarov and Gray as they were the next to visit Lucy. Natsu wasn't fond of Gray being so close to Lucy. He didn't know why but something about it irritated him. He brushed it off, why would he be mad about friends caring about friends? It was what everyone in the guild did.

The clock struck midday in the waiting room. The last of her guildmates left hours ago, she was the only one left to visit Lucy yet she couldn't move. There was no explanation for it, no rhyme or reason Mirajane could identify for stalling.

But no. That was a lie, a lie Mirajane used to save herself. To save her cracked heart from shattering completely. With shaky legs she got up from her chair and headed down the corridor that led to Lucy's room.

Mirajane made it to the front of Lucy's room. She tried to grab the handle and open the door, but she just couldn't. "I-If I go in there then everything will be real, if I stay out here than Lucy…she…"

Mirajane crumpled the side of her dress in frustration. "No, that's just a lie. It doesn't matter where I am, Lucy will be still laying in that hospital bed."

Mirajane breathed in a deep breath and counted to ten to calm herself, all techniques Porlyusica thought her and Elfman to help themselves when they got overwhelmed. Hesitantly she opened the door and took in her surroundings. Laying in the middle of the room was Lucy, hooked up to an ungodly number of machines. "I-Is this all just to keep her alive?"

Tears fell down her cheeks as she gently stroked Lucy's now short golden blonde hair. "Hey…you said you wouldn't get hurt like this again, now look at you. Your so reckless…although I can't exactly blame you. I'm such a h-hypocrite, telling other people not to be reckless when my own foolhardy recklessness killed L-Lisanna."

The silver haired barmaid sighed. "Of course, you wouldn't know about Lisanna. She was my-no our younger sister. I thought I could take on a demon known for its invincibility. I was so foolish, Makarov warned me about the mission but it was like I had something to prove. I can't remember what…teenage angst I suppose."

Mirajane bitterly laughed; tears were streaming anew down her face. "I-I took it over, but I couldn't control it. I…I turned against Lisanna and r-ripped her apart like an a-animal. For so long I held that guilt, I-I think I still do, but when you arrived everything seemed to change."

"I think I subconsciously thought of you as a replacement for Lisanna at first, but over time, as I got to know you, I realized something. You could never be a replacement for Lisanna, and seeking out a replacement, whether I knew it or not was wrong. I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry. I should have treated you better, I should have never tried to protect you against Phantom when I couldn't even use any magic."

"I hope one day you can forgive me." Mirajane got up from her chair and brushed Lucy's bangs aside, kissing her forehead. "I love you Lucy…"

The morning sun was peering through the curtains and it was blinding, all she wanted to do was roll over and sleep some more but she couldn't. Lucy felt constricted and stiff. It was as if someone or something was forcing her body to stay in place. She expected to panic, although oddly enough it never came.

She relaxed herself and calmed her breathing, and with what felt like an immense amount of effort she…

…Opened her eyes.

This chapter was a long time coming, in fact it is almost three months late. I think this is the best I'm going to get this chapter to be. I sort of dropped off writing for a while because i just lost a lot of motivation, but I'm back and hopefully i can try, keyword here being try, to update faster.

Hope you all enjoy it and i will se you all next time!

P.S. Thanks to Ushindi and two other guest reviews for the reviews/comments. It always makes my day.