Short Fuse

(Prompt: Kris & Susie pull a high stakes prank on Undyne.)

There's no way this works.

You press against the couch's cushion, a quiet squeak emanating from between the cheap rubber seats.

It wasn't even worth it really. It was a lost cause at this point. You could easily just go to the lake for the day, watch the shoreline. Heck, you could grab some snacks from the convenience store, head over to the lake, skip some rocks, it'd be great!

"So…school's good? Family all…alive?"

Your fingers curl around the rubbery cushions, the bored sounding voice tearing through your thoughts. Slowing peering back across the desk ahead, you watch as the police officer leans back in her chair, legs propped up atop the desk as she mindlessly stares ahead.

"Y-Yeah! They're…um, good."

"Hm. Good." Undyne nods, clicking her tongue.

Your eyes lock onto the solid blue tile below, panic swelling in your chest. This won't work. There's no way this works. You were already on thin ice as is, but this? Trying to pull one over on a police officer?

"Yeeep…good." The scaled woman sinks backwards, the front legs of her chair lifted off the ground. She quietly sighs, the desk creaking under her boots.

And what if you're caught? You shake your head. Not if, when. She'll eventually figure it out, and then what? You wouldn't be able to even breathe without your mom's permission after she finds out. And dad…

You wince. He'd just be disappointed.

Even worse.

"GAH!"

You jump as Undyne slams her chair back to the ground, the entire desk rattling as her yellow eyes burn into you.

"Would you tell me what the he-!" She clears her throat, , "Would you tell me what you need? Out with it already! Been sitting there like a statue for the past five minutes." The officer closes her eyes, "This about the fireworks? Told ya already, not gonna blab to your parents or anything. Just confiscated them because you and your friend were causing a fire hazard. If you're here to plead your case, don't bother."

You let out a shuddering breath, shaking your head from side to side.

Undyne grumbles as she leans across the desk, resting her chin in her hand, claws on full display, "Alright…then what is it? Some crazed murderer out in the streets? Your cat friend get stuck in a tree again? Oh!" Her eyes light up, "It's that weird other world thing you were telling me about, right? How there's a whole portal in your school? Kid, I gotta tell you, I've heard a lot of stories before, but that one was-"

"N-No!" You stammer out, "It's not…there's…"

You pause, trying to remember the plan. You just needed to follow the script, then Susie would play her part and…

You glance back up at the officer, a look of tired annoyance reflecting back.

Maybe it would work? You had to at least try; Susie was relying on you!

You gulp, "I…think there's a bear."

You're doomed.

Undyne raises an eyebrow, "…okay? The guy's a little much with the whole town politics thing, but he's alright, keeps to himself."

You begin to squirm in your seat, "No not him…no, like, in the woods? Near here? I think I saw one coming into town. It was pretty big and looked…mean?"

Undyne leans back in her chair once more, steepling her fingers, "Uh-huh. Well, it's the forest. Gonna see that sometimes. Not really something police deal with unless it's actually dangerous." She shrugs, "Leave it alone and it'll leave you alone."

You bite the bottom of your lip. This was a terrible idea. You could've been halfway through a bag of chips at the lake by now, but no, Susie had to get her fireworks back! How she even got her hands on them was beyond you. The only place she could've bought them from was the festival, but you were together the entire time and-

You lean back, pinching the bridge of your nose. You gave her that money for hotdogs. She left for five minutes; you even saw her stop at the vendor!

…and then you were ambushed by Snowy who went down an entire list of jokes he was practicing for the festival's talent show.

Exhaustion washes over as you sink down into the worn couch. The fireworks you could forgive, but leaving you to suffer through jokes even your dad would turn his nose up at? There was a line, and the dragon crossed it.

"Look, I'm sure it's fine. We don't get many wild animals actually poking around town. It was probably just sniffing around looking for food. It'll wander off as long as you don't bother it, okay?"

You carefully watch as Undyne stretches, quickly taking her cap off to sweep yellow claws through her fiery hair, "Now come on, go do whatever it is you kids do these days. Go do…homework. Or hijack a car." She freezes, "Scratch that one."

Panic swells in your chest, "B-But, I saw it! It was really close to here! And it looked like it had foam around it's mouth…or, uh…it just looked-"

You freeze in place as a guttural roar strains in your ears, nearly shaking the station's windows. You swallow sharply, gripping the couch's edge tight.

"The hell…?"

The officer scrambles up from her chair, eyes darting past your frozen form into the forest ahead, searching. A flicker of a smile dances along her lips before being stifled as she motions towards you.

"Stay here. Gonna go check this bear of yours out, see if it's actually causing trouble." Her eyes narrow, "May have to call some animal group or…look, just stay here for a bit, alright? My partner will be back soon, he'll walk ya back home if I'm still dealing with all this."

You nod. Undyne stares at you for a moment before swinging around her desk and dashing out the door, the glass-paned entrance closing back to silence with a soft pop.

You let out a gasp of air as you hastily jump from your seat, scanning across the room. Your gaze lingers on the cell nestled in the corner of the room for a moment before shaking away from the sight, steeling yourself. You meander past the desk's threshold, into unknown territory, pausing to search under the officer's desk. Bending down, you hastily search through the darkened space. Your face twists into a curious expression as you spot a collection of magazines underneath, the covers of which ranged from professional bodybuilders smiling back, to particularly animated characters with weapons three times their own size. You grumble, pulling yourself back up off the ground, continuing to search the station for signs of confiscated explosives.

Did she already dispose of them? It had only been a day since she spotted you and Susie about to set them off in the forest. You glance back out the windows towards the forest, dashing over to the filing cabinets in the corner before anyone happened to pass by. You grit your teeth, nervously searching over the loose documents scattered about, hopping in place to see up and over the cabinets.

"Come on, gotta be around here somewhere." You grumble, pushing the precariously placed boombox to the side. Dust is swept up into the air as you gently tap the surface of the cabinets, disappointment welling in your mind as you find nothing but cobwebs for your troubles.

"Damn it…"

You lean against the front of the filing cabinets, metal handles forming along the fibers of your sweater. There was always a chance the fireworks were already gone, but some part of you still held out hope. You were hoping to find them sitting in some dusty corner, ready and waiting for you to spirit them away. You sigh, dragging yourself from the steel cabinets, the cold metal no longer pressing into you.

You smirk. At least you tried. And Susie's roar was pretty good, all things considered. Not really the sound a bear would make, but still pretty convincing. Enough to trick a police officer at least.

You dejectedly shuffle out from the corner, glancing back at the windows, thankful for the empty streets ahead. You begin to brush past the pale blue wall dividing up the station's entrance and messily tucked away evidence, only to freeze in place as a rustling catches your attention. Leaning back around the corner, you follow the base of the wall, quickly spotting a cheap plastic bag tucked between the cabinets, dozens of colorful rockets and spiraling designs poking out from within. Your eyes go wide as you scramble towards the bag, grabbing up the collection of fireworks with barely contained glee.

It's all there. The packets of small white ones you would throw against the ground with Asriel. The rockets your dad never let you actually light. Even the spiraling strings of white and green that would streak across the entire neighborhood if you let them. A satisfied grin pulls at your lips as you loop your hands into the bag's handles, quickly rounding the corner past the desk and towards the entrance.

You had to give it to her, she had good taste in fireworks.

The door pops open with a gust of cold air as you make your way outside, nervously clutching the bag to your chest. Burying into your sweater's collar, you trace along the station's corner, eager to rendezvous with your partner in crime. The burning orange forest comes into view as you hastily sprint past the building's side. Scanning the area, you smile, the hint of a grey jacket peeking out from behind the trees.

"Hey? You there? I can't believe it, but I think I…"

You pause, the grass crunching from underneath each step. Staring at the sleeve of the girl's jacket, your heart begins to sink, silence hanging in the air. Before you can question the feeling, the dragoness comes into view, a sour expression on her maw as she's held aloft by the nape of her coat. You feel the life begin to leave your body as Undyne steps out from behind the tree, a bemused look exposing her sharpened yellow fangs.

"Found your bear. Doesn't look that mean to me, but you were right; it was probably getting into a bunch of stuff looking for food. Has a bunch of crumbs all over it."

Susie growls, flailing in Undyne's grasp, "Sh-Shut-up! I-"

"Whoa, don't think that's the kind of attitude you wanna be taking punk! Not too many laws against pretending to be a bear, but I'm pretty sure I recognize the bag your friend is holding right now…"

You stare at the dragoness as she meets your gaze, a look of despair in her eyes. Your shoulders sink as you quietly sigh, sending a weak grin back towards the worried girl. Her lips turn inwards as she sulks in Undyne's grasp, a quiet anger barely stifled.

"Now look, why don't we head back inside the station and-"

"Hey, she throw out the ones that explode when you toss 'em on the ground? In the packets?" Susie bellows out.

You blink, glancing from the dragoness down to the bag, "U-Uh…no?"

In a flurry of movement, the scaled girl twists from the officer's grasp, falling to the forest floor. Undyne's eyes go wide as leaves are kicked up into the air, immediately scrambling to grab at the dragoness once more.

"THROW THEM! FLASH BANG, FLASH BANG!"

Your arms seem to work on autopilot, immediately digging into the plastic bag and retrieving a packet of white paper fireworks. In one last panicked effort, you bring an arm across your eyes, blocking you from the explosion of light that was soon to come. You slam the packet down as hard as you can, a sharp pop echoing out into the surrounding forest. Without thinking, you sprint forward, eyes still covered, off and away.

…and smash into the dragoness.

You feel yourself drop to the ground, head spinning as the blinding orange of the canopies above dance in your vision. You blink, slowly coming back to reality, feeling a weight atop you. You stare out, finding a particularly dazed dragoness atop you, her mane almost entirely covering your chest. With one last sigh, you allow your head to sink back against the grassy surface, peering up through the trees and into the distant blue sky.

A soft crunching sound emanates at your side as Undyne's face comes into view, her grin having now turned into a look of pure joy.

"Ya know, most criminals try to run in different directions when escaping." She shakes her head, "Not that it would've helped. Those fireworks don't really have much of a flash. Good effort though."

You sink further into the ground below, feeling the scaled girl atop your chest stir.

"Ugh…you good?"

You limply drag a hand along the dragoness' back, her amber eyes slowly emerging from the mess of black hair, "Yeah. You?"

She flops back down against you, her voice muffled, "Just great."

You hear a grumble from above, "Come on you punks. Look alive."

Susie begins to push up off the ground, her mane continuing to fall over your prone form as she stumbles back to her feet. Offering a scaled hand, she pulls you from the ground, the world spinning for a moment as you orient yourself.

"…gonna arrest us?" Susie mumbles, dragging a hand through her hair.

"I dunno. Probably should, huh? Lying to a police officer, going through evidence, stealing contraband. I'm almost impressed!" Undyne crosses her arms, smiling at you, "The quiet Dreemurr kid's finally coming out of their shell and becoming a proper criminal…brings a tear to the eye."

You shift uncomfortably, a knot forming in your chest. A weight leans into you as you find Susie's jacket pressed to your side. You peer up, a weak smile reflecting back from the dragoness.

"Was my idea. I dragged them into it all, so…" Susie takes a deep breath, "If you gotta lock someone up, throw me in there."

Your eyes go wide as you open your mouth to protest, being silenced by the dragoness gently throwing an arm over your shoulder. You lean into her embrace, the knot in your chest fading.

"Ugh…look, I'm not arresting you. That's not how it works with kids or whatever. Only reason I even took those stupid fireworks was because you were lighting them up in the middle of the forest." Undyne begins to pace from side to side, grass crinkling beneath her boots, "Can't be doing that. If you're gonna light fireworks off, do it on the street when there's no traffic." She pauses, smirking, "Those little fireworks do better there anyway. If you hit dirt they just fizzle out. But if you go for pavement and angle it right-"

"Can you show us?"

You choke, a cough escaping your lips as you lurch forward. Desperately trying to collect yourself, you stare back up at the dragoness, a hopeful look on her maw. You glance between the officer and the scaled girl, mouth agape.

This won't work. It can't work. There's no way that-

"Eh, sure. Come on, not many cars go by the station. Can show you there."

Undyne spins away as you feel the dragoness' arm fall from your shoulder, slapping you on the back as she dashes off with a smile on her face. You stand there, frozen, unsure as to what reality you'd entered.

"W-Wha-"

"Oh, but seriously. Go through the stuff at the station again and I'll have you on community service until you two are adults." Undyne flips back around, a vicious grin on her face, "…and then I'll lock you up."

Your mouth snaps shut.

Forcing your legs onwards, you eventually manage to come to the dragoness' side. You peer around the girl, watching as Undyne digs through the plastic bag of colorful explosives, fetching a number of packets from within.

"Alright, so, like I said, mostly about the angle. That and how hard you slam it into the ground. Gotta put everything into it if you want a proper explosion." Undyne stands to full, tossing a small bag to Susie, "Watch and learn punks."

Without a second thought, the officer reels back, sending an entire packet of the small white fireworks careening towards the asphalt. You attempt to follow the movement, only to be blinded by the impact. Light burns in your vision as your ears begin to ring.

"Gah!" You yelp.

"Hell yeah! You see that?!"

The dragoness elbows you in the side as you desperately blink back to reality.

"I literally didn't see anything…" You grumpily mutter.

Squeezing your eyes tight once more, you open back up to the dragoness ahead, staring at you with a look of glee.

"It's cool. Watch, just do what I do!"

The dragoness tosses the packet of fireworks in the air, casually catching them before winding her arm back as she aims for the ground at your feet.

"W-Wait! Don't-!"

Blinding white light sears in your vision.

"AGH!"

[Author's Note]

Yo.

Little eh on this one, but the idea was cute and I wanted to try writing Undyne more. She's fun, same with a lot of the side characters. Need to create more opportunities to write them in. Something to work on for the future I suppose.