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JUST SO YOU KNOW: I haven't written a Wolfstar fic in a LONG time, so please be gentle with me XD

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Prompt from tigergirl-moonstar: Love story based on Remus and Sirius how they got together and their relationship how it was meant to be without Voldemort and sent to Azkaban

P.S. I know it's been a while, BUT I've graduated my Masters Degree in Creative Writing, and I'm trying to write my own book! I'll be trying to write more now, so, PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH ME!

Chapter 11

Remus

My parents decided to leave a couple of hours after Sirius and Harry had joined us. Mum was still getting over a case of the flu from the week before; she still felt drowsy and run down, so late nights were still a no-go. Though, to be honest, my parents hadn't been ones for late nights in years. Sirius and I walked them both to the foyer, to the fireplace, after passing a sleeping Harry back to Lily, and after Mum and Dad had bid goodbye to the elder Potters.

"So, tomorrow," Dad said as we entered the room. "We'll come over, about, three?"

"Any time's fine, Mr L." Sirius grinned. "And you can stay as late as you want too. We can always make up the spare bedroom for you guys, right, Rem?"

"Definitely," I agreed. "We would love to have you."

"Oh, we wouldn't want to be a bother," Mum worried as we came to a stop.

Taking one of Mum's hands in mine, I squeezed lightly.

In many ways, I was like my mum. I always had been, since I was a young child. We shared many of the same traits and loves; I would spend all of my time with her, whilst Dad was at work. Unfortunately, we also shared some of the same anxieties. One of them happened to be: being a burden on others. Growing up, Mum didn't have a lot of money and she was the second born of seven children. She helped raise her siblings, while her dad was away at sea in the Navy; she helped with housework and anything her mum needed. Mum felt guilty asking to go spend time with friends, especially when her older brother started working to bring in some more money; she hated asking for new clothes or shoes, even when her old ones were full of holes that could no longer be patched up.

"It would be no trouble at all," I told her. "You're always welcome."

"Well, only if you boys are sure," Mum fussed. "But I insist on making breakfast then; no arguing."

"But, Mam–"

"Remus John Lupin, I said no arguing. Now, give me a cwtsh; c'mon, bend down so I can reach your handsome face."

Chuckling, I did as my mother asked. I bent at the waist slightly and wrapped my arms around her tightly, kissing her on the cheek at the same time she kissed mine. Her grip on me was fierce, as it had been since I was a young boy. Her hugs were always the best, in my opinion – they used to fully envelop me and make me warm. They only got tighter after I was bitten. As I got older, and the more I began to have my freedom, especially with Dumbledore allowing me into Hogwarts, the more Mum began to worry. She started hugging me like she might never see me again. If certain people found out about my 'Fury Little Problem', if it spread around the school and told to parents and the Ministry, she probably wouldn't have. I would have been taken away from my friends and family. I would have been isolated from them, maybe sent to Azkaban or banished from the Wizarding World I knew. Perhaps experimented on or caged like an animal. Maybe broken down until I was willing to become an attack dog for them.

As we pulled away from each other, Mum was quick to grab hold of Sirius for a hug. Out of my friends, I was sure he was one of her favourites. I turned to Dad, his arms sliding around me easily. There was never any hesitancy in Dad when he hugged me, not anymore. For a few years after I was bitten, when he began to talk to and interact with me again, he was still highly uncomfortable with touching me. Like he was going to break me or make me worse. It took a lot of time and a lot of healing, and a kick up the arse from Mum, before he sorted himself and his feelings out. After that, it was like he was making up for the lost time. He didn't care when, seeing me off at the station to Hogwarts, some other fathers stared as he hugged me. He didn't care about the huffs or the few comments that we would hear. He didn't let any of it stop him from showing his love for me.

"We'll see you tomorrow, Re," Dad murmured as he patted my back. "I'll pop over to the bakery before we come over, and pick you up some of those pastries you like, alright?"

"Tad, you don't have to do that," I replied.

"I know, but I want to. As your father, it's my prerogative to buy things for you, no matter how old you get."

Grinning as we let each other go, placed his hand on my face and gave a soft squeeze on my cheek. I batted him away lazily, turning to look over at Mum and Sirius.

Mum hooked her arm around Dad's, comfortably slotting next to him; an easy smile gracing her face. Sirius stepped next to me, slinging his arm around my shoulders as he usually did, the smell of leather filling my senses.

"You boys have a good night," Dad said, taking Mum's bag for her. "Enjoy yourselves."

"Don't worry, Mr L, we will." Sirius laughed. "Get home safe though, yeah?"

"Oh, you sweetheart," Mum cooed. "We'll see you both tomorrow!"

With a goodbye, Sirius and I watched as Mum and Dad walked into the fireplace. We waved as Dad said their address, catching their response before they disappeared in the flames.

As soon as they were gone, we made our way back to the party.

Sirius and I didn't leave Mr and Mrs Potter's anniversary party until the early hours of the morning and, after bidding goodbye to all the Potters, we stumbled through the fireplace in the foyer. I managed to half-drag a drunk Sirius into our living room, stumbling slightly under his build and his complete lack of cooperation. At some point, Sirius' tie had ended up tied around his head, and half of his shirt unbuttoned; I could only be grateful he still had his shoes and jeans on. Many times, during our Hogwarts days, Sirius had become a little too rambunctious and drunk on Firewhisky, to the point where he had actually run around the school grounds. Naked. And more than once.

I couldn't be mad, however.

It was a celebration; a time to have fun. After everything that had happened with the war, we all more than deserved it. Besides, it wasn't as if Sirius got drunk every night. Hell, he rarely drank and, if he did, it was a birthday or holiday or party and he only had one or two.

"Come on, Pads," I huffed, pulling him along. "Let's get you to bed."

"Oooo, Mr Moon-Moon," Sirius snickered. "Buy me dinner first."

"Yes, yes, very funny. You really need to sleep this off."

"Will you keep me warm?"

Somehow, Sirius seemed to grow six extra arms. No matter what I did, I couldn't stop them from wrapping around me; I couldn't stop him from pulling me closer and pressing his chest against my back. For a moment, no matter how stupid it sounded, it felt as if my heart had stopped beating. By the time I could breathe again, could move again, Sirius was nuzzling into my neck, his stubble prickling my skin in a terrifyingly delightful way.

"No," I breathed, trying to keep my voice as steady as possible. "No, I won't be keeping warm. That's why you have a duvet."

"But I want you," he whined, clinging to me tighter. "You're so snuggly and warm."

"And you're drunk."

"Not as drunk as you think I am."

It was said so quietly that I barely heard it. To be honest, I wasn't sure I had. Because that would mean Sirius had more cognitive awareness of what he was doing and to who he was doing it, and there was absolutely no way that was possible. None at all.

So, I ignored that hopefully little voice in my head.

Biting my teeth together as hard as I could, I forced myself to move; I forced my voice not to crack as I begged him to 'please, just cooperate with me'. For a short time, it was fine. We made our way across the living room and up the stairs in one piece. No one tripped; no one bumped into anything. Everything was fine.

Then we reached Sirius' room.

I had managed to sit Sirius on his bed, though his arms were still tight around my middle. No matter what I tried, I knew I would struggle to get Sirius' jacket off; wandless magic always came in handy in such situations. With his jacket removed, however, all I felt was more of his body heat seeping through my clothes.

"Sirius, you need to let go of me now," I sighed. "You need to sleep this off."

"No, I need you to sleep on me," Sirius grinned, pressing his face into my stomach. "C'mon, cuddle with me."

"No, Sirius."

"But I wanna cuddle!"

"I said no, Sirius."

"But I–"

"Please."

Sirius' arms loosed slightly from around me, his shoulders tensed. I felt his head move until his chin was pressing lightly into my stomach, face turned up to me.

But I didn't see his expression.

My eyes were clenched shut, as tightly as I could make them. I could feel them start to sting, an ache settling in my throat, as I forced myself to not cry in front of my friend. All I wanted was to go to bed; to get under my covers and go to sleep, and hope Sirius remembered nothing in the morning.

Slowly, I felt Sirius move backwards, arms moving until his hands were resting on my hips. Still, I didn't open my eyes. I could feel his thumbs rub soothing circles into my hip bones, but all it did was put me further on edge than I already was.

"I-I'm sorry," Sirius muttered. "Y'right, I'm drunk; I need to sleep."

As Sirius' hands left my body, I stepped backwards before I opened my eyes. He had shuffled backwards on his bed, focusing on clumsily pulling off his shoes. With a mumbled goodnight, I walked as fast as I could to my own room.

Hands trailed over my body, electrifying each and every nerve ending. Blood rushed in my ears; my heart thumped in my throat. I could barely breathe. My skin burned with every touch; with every possibility that they could lead to. I needed him to touch me more. To embrace me. To take me to that addictive high and never bring me back down. I didn't care that the callouses on his fingers, the ones from hours of playing the guitar, would catch on my skin; I didn't care that the sensation was both too much and not enough. All I wanted was for him to keep touching me.

Softly, lovingly, he traced each scar he came into contact with; barely their brushes of lips would follow the path he made. I couldn't focus much on the feeling. Not because of how feather-light they were but because, with each touch, he got lower and lower. Every hair on my body stood on end, the further went.

"Please," I heard myself breathe. "Please."

His laugh was muffled by my stomach, the low vibration reverberating through me. I couldn't stop my hands from moving, from threading through his dark hair. The softness from his locks perfectly contradicted the hard planes of his body; the rough scratch of his stubble.

So many sensations and not enough awareness to fully compute or appreciate them.

"Hush, Rem," he whispered, fingers curling around the band of my underwear. "Just enjoy."

I couldn't hold back the whimper that forced its way out.

Blunt nails scratched at my hips as they travelled down. They dug in enough to leave faint red marks on my skin; enough for me to feel them. Not enough to hurt. The moment his touch left me, to throw my underwear to the side, I felt cold. I reached out for him, a soft whine echoing in the air. I didn't want the comfortable weight of him on top of me to leave for even a second; I didn't want him to suddenly disappear.

"Shh, shh," he hushed, slotting himself back between my legs. "It's alright; I'm still here."

"Please," I begged. "Please."

I didn't know what I wanted him to do. Anything? Everything? I wasn't sure. All I knew was I wanted, needed, for him to keep touching me. As soon as I was able, my arms were around his neck and my hands threaded through his hair again. A pleasured grunt rumbled through him as I scratched, lightly, at his scalp.

Grateful didn't begin to describe what I felt for us already being on the bed – I was sure my legs would have given out long ago otherwise.

I opened my eyes as he leaned up slightly. His hair fell around his face, casting it into shadows; a hand slid from my waist until it could cup around my neck, his thumb pressing gently under my chin to make me look at him.

"What is it, Rem?" he smirked. "What d'you want?"

"I– I don't– I can't," I managed. "Please."

"No, no, I need you to tell me. Tell me what you want; tell me what you need."

"Sirius…"

"Tell me every little detail."

Wrapping my hands around the back of his neck, I tried to pull him back onto me. But Sirius didn't budge. He kept his short distance, grinning down at me. The hand on my neck moved again, slowly; trailing carefully along my skin. The fingers circled my hips and stomach, but it didn't stop there. The closer his touch got, the more I was on edge. Waiting; anticipating.

I could taste the beating of my heart; could feel the blood rushing through my veins. Everything else seemed to blur. Only Sirius existed at that moment. The second the tips of his fingers brushed between my legs, I couldn't so much as think. No coherent thought could piece itself together, only gibberish interspersed with Sirius' name.

I still needed more.

The teasing touches never stopped, never progressed. He wouldn't take me into his hand or move anywhere, no matter how I tried to move him or myself.

"Tell me," he demanded. "Tell me."

"Please," I whined.

"Please what?"

I shook my head.

He stopped.

I could feel the warmth of his skin on mine, so close but not touching. A slight sob wracked through my body; the beginning of tears pricked at the corner of my eyes. My nails dug into his shoulders as I tried to keep myself from breaking, but he didn't seem to care. Sirius just leaned down, pressing his lips gently to my eyes in turn.

"Please what, Rem?" he repeated.

"Touch… me," I finally breathed. "Please, just– Touch me, lick me, fuck me. Just do something, please!"

My body shook as I tried to keep myself calm. There was no use when Sirius took that opportunity to grasp me firmly, his grip sure and pumping fast. I couldn't hold in the moans that were ripped from my throat; I couldn't stop the pleasure that rolled through my body.

And I didn't want to.

But all too soon, I could feel the sweet peak of relief coming; all too soon it would come to an end.

"Let yourself go, Rem," Sirius whispered into my ear, smirking and biting gently. "The fun's only just begun."

I woke up in a cold sweat, sticky and out of breath. Shame and guilt descended upon me, slowly like a morning fog. For years I had been fantasising about my best friend; for years I hadn't been able to get a handle on my emotions or control my fantasies. I was supposed to be the mature one, the smart one. This unrequited infatuation was neither. And I knew that. So, why did it keep happening?

Sighing, I whipped my duvet off and stood up, carefully peeling my pyjama bottoms away from and off of me. I buddled them up carefully, using a dry patch to clean myself down as best I could. Throwing them into the hamper basket in the corner of my room, I sat down on the edge of my bed. Rubbing my face, I berated myself for having such delusional dreams. Because they would never come true.

I suppose I could only be grateful that Sirius had never caught or heard me.

P.S. Know it's been a while, BUT I've graduated my Masters Degree in Creative Writing, and I'm trying to write my own book! I'll be trying to write more now, so, PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH ME!

Please, please review XD

Thank you so much guys ^_^