Reminder:
Regular text takes place in the story they are writing.
Italicized text takes place in the real world.
"You are in a lot of trouble young lady!" Lynn Sr. reprimanded his second youngest daughter, who was sitting on the couch, still a complete mess, like all the other siblings, who were all also in the room giving her angry glares, "I mean, we give you a lot of leeway with your experiments, probably more than we should now that I think of it. But you could have destroyed this entire house! Do you have any idea how lucky your mother and I were to find this house after getting married!? It's not every day that a fraternity gets three strikes!"
"I'm sorry, Male Parental Unit…"
"Not only that, but you should consider yourself very lucky that no one was seriously injured!"
Rita then addressed the rest of her kids, "You are all okay right?"
"Huh?" Lincoln responded, "Oh, yeah. Just still feeling kind of queasy…"
At that time, through the busted open door, Clyde McBride, Lincoln's best friend since age 5 ran in with a panicked expression.
"*gasp* *gasp*Lincoln! Are you alright!? I heard an explosion coming from here, and I got here as fast as I could!? *gasp* What happened!? Please tell me you don't have to get anything amputated!"
Clyde was really freaking out now, to the point where he couldn't even get his words straight.
"Clyde!" Lincoln said, "Calm down! Where's your bag!?"
Clyde listened and quickly took out his bag and started breathing into it.
"Just breathe. Inhale, exhale. Long breaths"
Clyde's breathing slowed and he managed to calm himself down
Clyde was by no means a tough kid. The nerdy, awkward kid was the only child of two loving but neurotic fathers, who did just about everything they could to shelter him. He first met Lincoln when they ran into each other trick-or-treating, and the two of them hit it off, sharing quite a lot of the same interests. Since then, Lincoln had encouraged Clyde to come out of his shell more, and they were now part of a larger group of friends, which Lincoln was the unofficial leader of, but Lincoln and Clyde considered each other to be brothers. Lincoln was the person Clyde confided in the most, along with his psychologist, who he had on speed dial. Due to his emotional issues, he would call Dr. Lopez frequently over some emergency or impending panic attack, unknowingly cutting short at least 6 dates. He also had asthma, and suffered more than a few allergies. He also had a bit of an unhealthy crush on Lori, and would often suffer one of his frequent nosebleeds at the mere sight of her.
"Listen," Lincoln explained, "I'm fine, we're all fine."
"What about my sweet Lori?"
"Clyde…" Lincoln whispered, "We talked about this."
"Well, anyway," Lynn Sr. continued, "I let you off the hook for shrinking your brother, I forgave you for switching Lori and the dog's brains, and I let you off with a warning for giving the house artificial intelligence, that if you remember, turned out to be evil! But nearly vaporizing your sisters and blowing up the entire town!? That's at least months grounding for you!"
"But-"
"I don't want to hear it. Your scientific equipment is going into the garage, and until your room is repaired, you and Lily will be sleeping in Lincoln's room."
"Dang it…" Lincoln muttered.
"Am I clear?"
"… as clear as silicate glass… But you will need my help to remove my equipment from my room. Some of it is set to detonate if removed by anyone without my fingerprints."
"Fine. As for the rest of you, I know your rooms aren't in great condition, but you're gonna have to manage."
"Aw come on!" Luna complained.
"Thanks a lot Lisa," Lynn Jr. said.
"Now then," Rita added, "It's late and it's been a pretty crazy night, so I suggest we all get some shut eye."
The siblings relented and walked upstairs.
"Well," Clyde said, "I better get back home. Now that I think about it, my dads are probably wondering where I am… uh oh… See ya tomorrow!"
Clyde bolted out the door to get back home before his dads tore the entire house apart, and the siblings went upstairs to form a long line to the bathroom to get themselves cleaned up for bed. Thank god the bathroom door survived.
"We never did get those hot dogs…" Lana complained
As the siblings made their way upstairs, Rita spoke up.
""Lori, can I talk to you real quick?"
She and Lincoln looked at each other confused before she made her way back to the living room. While Lincoln discreetly stood along the stairs
"Lori, how did this all happen while we left you in charge?"
"I… well… I was making dinner. Lana spent the pizza money… I can't keep my eye on all ten of them every second of every day."
"I understand that Lori. Believe me, anytime we go on a big trip, me and your father have to triple check the car to make sure we didn't leave anyone behind… again. But Lori, if you really want to be the adult in the building, it can't just be you versus everyone else. It might not seem like it, but some of them are actually on your side."
"I- I just try to get through the night."
"I know, but the fact that something like this happened under your watch makes me seriously reconsider leaving you in charge."
From the stairs, Lincoln could tell that Lori was starting to get really stressed out.
Lincoln spoke to the audience, "I mean… It's not exactly my business, and it's not like Lori's been the most fair to me or any of my other sisters in the past. Also, Her versus everyone else? If I recall correctly, I'm the one who she and the others typically gang up on. Seriously, how many times has she threatened and yelled at me? Even for things that weren't entirely my fault. Honestly, I should just go upstairs and let her take whatever's coming to her…."
"…"
"…Dang It…"
Lincoln quickly came back down the stairs, "Mom, before you go any further, you should know that I was actually in Lisa's room. I saw what she was doing, I knew it could be dangerous, but I just went and left her to continue. Also, when I heard noise coming from her room, I had a feeling something was wrong, but I ignored it."
"Are you serious!?" His mom said, "Don't you think you should have let Lori know that Lisa was doing something like this?"
"... I guess it just slipped my mind."
"Lincoln, I know it's tough sharing a house with this many girls, and I'm not saying you should be a snitch or anything, but you can't just look the other way when you see someone doing something you know they shouldn't."
"Honestly, she's always doing some weird experiment, I didn't think it was that big of a deal."
"The kitchen table is currently up in the tree in the backyard," Lori said, "We all could have died! That sounds like a pretty big deal to me!"
"Well," RIta said, "tonight, I'd like the two of you to do some serious thinking about what you could have done differently tonight and how you're going to make sure this doesn't happen again. Otherwise I may have to consider leaving you all at Aunt Ruths whenever we go out."
The two of them nearly had a heart attack at the prospect of having to stay at Aunt Ruth's, a woman whose husband let himself get kidnapped by the Burmese government just so he could get away from her.
"Yes mom!" Lori said.
"Understood!" Lincoln added.
"Alright. Get a good sleep, kids."
The two siblings obeyed and made their way back upstairs.
"Hey Linc?" Lori said, "um… thanks for the save back there."
"Yeah well, I'd say we're even now…."
"What do you me-?"
Before Lori could finish her sentence, Lincoln dashed to the bathroom line, taking a spot ahead of Lori.
"Oh, come on!" Lori complained
That night, Lincoln was in his pajamas and in his bed, reading his damaged Ace Savvy comics, with Lily in a spare crib. He had a hard time concentrating though, as he was feeling pretty lightheaded. He must have been more tired than he thought.
"Yeah, I know," he said to the readers, "I should have just kept my mouth shut, but it's not like the stuff me and mom said was entirely untrue. I could have said something to Lisa, maybe that her experiment could get Lori in trouble."
He looked down at his Ace Savvy comic.
"Ace Savvy certainly doesn't look away when he sees trouble, of any kind. Whenever he sees anyone in need of help, he comes to their rescue, without condition and without reward. In one issue, he even flew all the way from China to South America at the speed of sound just to save one old woman from getting hit by a car. I've tried to be like that, at least to the best of my abilities, but, this is the real world, and I'm hardly the strongest or the most talented guy in this house, and I am a bit of a coward… and compared to my sisters, I have so little to offer…"
Soon, Lisa came in, carrying a glass container with some weird glowing object in it.
"Lisa? Is that Lily's diaper?"
"Positive. More specifically, It's the ultra absorbent one which I created, the same one that got blasted off of Lily. It would seem that It has absorbed a great deal of the shockwave. Once my grounding has concluded, I plan to commence research into this phenomenon."
"But why's it in that box?"
"Physical human contact could trigger yet another sub-atomic explosion."
"Sub-atomic explosion?"
"Basically, a release of explosive raw atomic energy without the explosion part."
"Lisa, if you're planning to blow up the entire world, you may as well get it over with before I reach puberty. I'm not prepared."
"Don't be ridiculous. While the effects of sub-atomic energy have never been fully tested on the human body, we now know that it is… mostly harmless."
"Well, it didn't exactly hurt but… when that thing zapped me, It was like my insides were spinning and bouncing around inside myself, and my skin felt like soda water."
"Indeed, I also experienced this sensation, and our siblings informed me they all felt the same."
"Just please be careful next time. As I told you when you wanted to create your own Frankenstein Monster, I like my organs where they are."
Soon enough, Lily was sound asleep and Lincoln was feeling drowsy as well, not to mention a little bloated for some reason. Lisa however was still sitting on her sleeping bag writing down notes in her notepad.
"Lisa, just go to sleep…"
"But I'm not even tired."
"How can you not be tired? It's 12:30 in the morning"
"I simply do not feel energetically depleted"
"Eh, do whatever you want," Lincoln turned off the lights in the room, making sure the night light was on for Lily, "g'night…"
And he pulled the covers over himself and drifted to sleep.
Meanwhile, Lori was back in her room, laying in her bed once again glued to her phone texting her boyfriend. She was venting about the events of the night, and her frustrations with her siblings. Bobby responded by reminding her that they were still her siblings. She couldn't really argue with that. He was typically the more mellow of the two of them, balancing out her aggressive personality.
She did love her siblings, but they frequently got under her skin. It was a conflicting feeling that made her all the more anxious about the subject of college. She wasn't sure if she could survive in this house much longer, and she looked forward to the college experience, feeling that she would love the chance to live in a new environment with more space and freedom. But life in this house with her large family was the only thing she had ever really known, and it gave her a sense of comfort, familiarity, and security. It drove her crazier than the times she woke up to find Lana's frog asleep on her face.
Finally, she put her phone away to get some shut eye. She struggled a bit to get comfortable. Spring truly was here, and with it came the heat, though she felt unusually warm tonight.
""Leni? Any chance you can open the-"
Lori looked over at the shattered window.
"Oh, right…"
Later, in the middle of the night, while Lincoln and Lisa were sound asleep, Lily stirred awake. She needed to use the restroom.
And…
...Done
Once she was finished soiling her diaper, she noticed the nightlight beginning to flicker.
"Huh?"
After flickering more, the light went out completely, leaving the poor baby in nearly pitch black darkness, something she was not fond of. She began to whimper in fright, but it didn't seem like either of her roommates were awake to comfort her. She was about to hide herself under her blakie and start crying in fear, but her eyes began to feel irritated. She shut them and rubbed them with her hands. When she opened them, the strangest thing happened. Her eyes lit up like flashlights, making two little light beams.
"Oooh!"
Her fear immediately began to dissipate, and a smile returned to her face, while she looked around the dark room with her lightvision, like some sort of search light, without shining it into either Lincoln or Lisa's faces. She couldn't help but giggle softly at her childlike wonderment at this development. Being a baby, she didn't understand what was happening, or how unusual it actually was. All she cared about was that it wasn't dark anymore, so she simply laid back down into her bed, enjoying the light she was making.
None of them realized it yet, but their DNA was in the middle of an extraordinary change.
The next morning, by 9:00 A.M., most of the siblings were out of bed. Pretty early considering it was Spring Break, but a lot of them had plans today.
Lincoln was in the kitchen, dropping a seltzer tablet in a glass of water, with his hand on his stomach and a queasy look on his face, just as Lynn Jr. came in with a pair of soccer cleats over her shoulder.
"Well well," Lynn smiled, "Looks like someone had the runs again last night."
"What? No! I've just *urp…* I've just been feeling really gassy."
"How gassy?"
"I dunno, I've had this sort of bloated feeling in my stomach since waking up"
Lisa came in, with a bad case of bed head, "he was burping and flatulating continuously this previous night."
"Lisa!" Lincoln shouted embarrassed, accidentally letting out another loud burp.
"Good lord!" Lynn said, doing nothing to hold back her laughter, "You didn't eat those hotdogs off the ground last night did you?"
"No! I just made a small peanut butter sandwich"
"Well, because of your gaseous nocturnal activities, I got at best a good 4 hours of Rapid Eye Movement Hibernation, a.k.a. Sleep."
"Yikes," Lynn said, "you must be exhausted."
"Actually, I don't feel depleted at all."
"Not even a little?" Lincoln asked, taking a big drink from his seltzer water.
"Negative, if anything, I feel more awake than ever."
"I wouldn't have guessed, " Lynn teased, "given what a mess your hair is."
Lynn tried to ruffle her younger sister's hair, only to be given a small static shock.
"YOW! Remind me never to fall asleep on those wool carpets!"
"Anyways," Lincoln said, "Me and Lori are meeting up with Ronnie-Anne and Bobby at the county fair, along with Clyde and the others."
Lynn was about to open her mouth.
"This is not a date!" Lincoln interrupted, "Still though, I'd like to not be shooting gas everywhere when *brap!* I see her for the first time in months."
"Just blame it on your shoes" Lynn suggested "like Lori does."
"I heard that!" Lori exclaimed, having heard them from the living room, checking out the thermostat, with a fan in her other hand.
'72?' She thought to herself, 'that can't be right'
"You okay?" Lincoln asked, walking out of the kitchen.
"Seriously? No one else feels hot right now?"
"No- *urk* not really no."
"I had to sleep without my covers last night, and when I woke up this morning, my bed still felt like an oven."
As she was talking, Leni came down wiping some moisture from her brow.
"I mean, look at Leni, she was marinated in sweat."
"Actually, I didn't feel hot at all."
"Are you kidding me? It's like you peed the bed."
"Hey! I'm too old for that now. I'm not 14 anymore."
Lynn and Lisa came into the living room.
"Don't forget," Lynn said, "On your way to the fair, you have to drop me off at soccer practice. Despite SOMEONE'S attempt to KILL me…" She glared over at Lisa, "I'm gonna make sure to whip our team in shape for our upcoming game against the Larry Birds"
"The what?" Lincoln asked.
"The Birds," Lynn explained, "Paul Larry Middle School's premiere soccer team."
As Lincoln nodded in befuddled understanding, Lori turned on the air conditioning speed on high, causing the relatively strong air to come from the nearby air vent, and onto the siblings. But as the air blew against him, Lincoln found himself struggling against it, dragging his feet across the floor, even though none of the others, not even Lisa, who was less than half his size, seemed to be affected. Only their hair and some of their clothing seemed to be moving with the breeze.. He held his hand against his brow as though he was struggling against a blizzard, trying to fight against the wind, while his sisters watched in confusion and slight amusement, but he ended up falling off his feet and tumbling back into the kitchen, making a few crashing noises.
"Jeez Bro," Lynn said, "Maybe eat another sandwich sometime."
Meanwhile, over in the dining room, Rita was feeding Lily in her high chair, with Lucy sitting on the table eating her PENTAGRAINS cereal, when Luna came in carrying a guitar bag, with a look of discomfort and some tense body movements.
"What's the matter with you?" Lucy asked with no hint of emotion.
"I dunno," Luna answered, trying to stretch out her leg, "I must have slept weird last night, cause all my joints feel super stiff"
"Well that's strange," Rita said, "The only one here who seems to wake up like that is your father."
"Perhaps it's early onset Arthritis," Lucy said, "IF that's the case, your transition into adulthood is going to be miserable."
"...By the way," Luna said, "Mom, yall may need to check on Luan, I don't think she's feeling well."
"Oh dear. Does it look like she has a cold?"
"I think so, but I've never seen one as intense as this."
"Perhaps we should quarantine her," Lucy suggested, "like they did in the middle ages. We'll need to build an underground dungeon first."
Rita was feeling very concerned now, so she called in her husband to finish up with Lily.
"Good luck at band practice today," she said before heading upstairs.
As she made her way up, she thought to herself, 'wait… Is it me, or was Lucy's shadow in a different position than the rest of ours…? Eh, what am I talking about?"'
Rita came to Luan's door and knocked.
"Luan? Can I come in?"
"S-s-s- sure… c- *ACHOO!* come in."
Rita came in. Luna wasn't kidding. Luan was wrapped in her blanket, her nose all red, and shivering like she saw a ghost.
"Goodness! Luan, you don't look so good."
"What are y-y-you talking about..? It was just a lit-t-t-t-t-le chilly *ACHOOO!* in here last night."
It seemed like a lot of the kids were waking up feeling slightly under the weather today. Lincoln with stomach problems, Leni's excessive sweating, Luna's stiff muscles… She hoped this wasn't another flu.
"Alright sweetie, let me take a look at you."
Rita sat down on Luan's bed and felt her forehead.
"Huh, that's odd. You certainly don't feel warm. Actually, you feel a bit cooler than usual."
"S-see? I'm fine. I just need a nice hot shower"
"Well, just to be safe, I'm going to check your temperature. In the meantime, I'll see if I can get your father to make you that soup of his."
Luan cringed at that idea. She was cold, not constipated.
"It's strange," Rita remarked, "Luna sleeps in this room with you and she doesn't seem all that cold."
"I g-g-g-guess she j-just has a ch-ch-chill personality… get *ACHOO!* get i-*ACHOO!* g-*ACHO!* ge-"
"Yes, I get it."
Out in front, Lori was getting into the driver's seat in Vanzilla, while Lincoln and Lynn Jr. were racing to get to the front seat. Of course, Lynn made it to the car door first.
"Dang it!" Lincoln said.
"Ha ha!" Lynn boasted, "you snooze, you lose, Stinkoln!"
She pulled on the door handle, only to end up accidentally yanking it off completely.
"Woah!" Lincoln said.
Lori looked out at the scene and saw Lynn with the door handle in her hand, who then tried to hide it behind her back from her with a fake innocent smile. Lori simply rolled her eyes.
'This car is showing its age,' she thought to herself.
Soon, they drove off, with both Lincoln and Lynn sitting in the passenger seats, Lynn with a grumpy look on her face, not noticing how bent and dented the broken handle really was.
In the backyard, Lola was lounging on one of the chairs with a pair of sunglasses, soaking in the spring sun with a tall glass of lemonade in her hand. Her only annoyance was her twin playing loudly in the mud.
"Lana! I swear! If you get a single drop of dirt on this dress, you won't be able to eat solid foods for MONTHS!"
"What's the matter Lola? You're afraid the mud monster will get you?"
"The what?"
"The mud monster. Legend has it that it dwells in the darkest, deepest, and filthiest mud puddles on the planet. They say that it grabs hold of snobby little girls like yourself, AND THEN DEVOURS THEM!"
Lola was visibly cringing in disgust.
"Eww! Give me a break! The only mud monster that exists in this world is YOU!"
"I wish!" Lana exclaimed, going back to her "business", while rubbing a little bit of sand out of her eye, which was a bit strange since she already rubbed some salt this morning and put it in Lola's hair while she was still asleep.
Lola rolled her eyes and picked up her copy of Spoiled Rotten Monthly
"Alright Miss Hilton," Lola said, opening the magazine, "tell me your secrets."
As she laid back though, she felt a sense of discomfort in her left sleeve. She used her other hand to probe into it and pulled out a green leaf. How did that get in there? Oh well.
We now cut over to the soccer field, where Lynn was being dropped off by Lori, and where her teammates were waiting for her. Once Vanzilla drove off, Lynn ran over with her soccer cleats on.
"Alright girls, huddle!" She yelled.
All the others group together in front of her. They all knew better than to argue with her.
"Now then, we have all faced great challenges, bonds have been forged, enemies have been made, and a few bones were broken. All in the name of victory. But as I look upon all of you today, I remind you of your oaths to this team, and all the times we emerged as winners. You're welcome by the way. Today, here on this hallowed ground, we once again give our sweat, our blood, and if necessary, our very lives.
'Whelp, we're all gonna die,'' one teammate thought.
"Remember, your mothers aren't here to hold your hands through this. So any ideas of mercy you have, throw them out the window right now, because I guarantee you, the Larry Birds will show you none. They will not hesitate to exploit any weakness shown on the field, so we must not show any! And once the Birds are on the ground eating the dirt, we will be one step closer to finals, where we will make the Stephen Zodiac Middle School Killers drop down to their knees and see us as olympians they could only ever dream to be. And when you return home, you will no longer be just you, your names will be immortalized in golden writing, for our ancestors to gaze upon until the sun swallows the planet whole!"
The others just stood there, staring at her still and silent.
"Now then," she continued, "my mom packed us all snicker-doodles. Anyone want some? :3"
Everyone immediately dropped their tense stature and went over to grab some.
Once everyone got at least one, they went over to the bleachers to eat. As Lynn went to sit down though, she suddenly felt her bottom being pulled to the metal seat, sort of like magnetism. She landed on there with a metallic thud.
"What the..?" She said to herself.
She tried pulling herself away, but she seemed very firmly stuck to it. She pulled against the bleacher harder and harder, grunting heavily, until she managed to yank herself away, falling face first onto the ground. After wiping the grass from her face, she looked over at the seat and noticed that her hands seemed to make a bent impression into the metal bleacher. She simply looked down at her hands. She always was the strongest person in the room, but this was a bit frightening.
"What is in those snicker-doodles?"
"Abysmal morning, Morticians Club," Lucy announced, prevailing over her group, which was meeting in the local library, "I call today's meeting in order. First off, I am indifferent to announce that Morpheus's baby brother turned one year closer to the grave yesterday, so everyone give him a depressed sigh.
Everyone just sighed.
"Also, some updates, our Paris chapter ran into some trouble with the law, and they are now being evicted from the catacombs, and our legal battles with the OTHER Morticians Club is still ongoing.
"If those guys are so certain that the end is near," Dante asked the others, "then why do they even care?"
"Now then," Lucy continued, "Haiku will now read passages from the eulogy of her Uncle Matthew."
Lucy stepped down from her podium to make way for her best friend and co-president Haiku
As she sat down, after listening to Haiku greet everyone, she let one one of her typical sighs. But this time, as she did so, some shadowy substance eeped out her mouth, causing her to abruptly put her hands over her mouth confused.
"Not yet Pazuzu", Lucy whispered to no one, "The deal was 30 to 40 years."
Over at the mall…
"Oh man," Clyde said, " This is so much to keep track of! I don't think my systems can process it! ERROR! ERROR!"
Luckily, Lincoln had a breath pump in his room for this very scenario, also in case Leni forgets how to breathe again. He quickly put it over his friend's mouth.
"Easy, Clyde! Just relax and breathe."
Soon enough, Clyde finally began to calm down.
"Thank you"
"Now where were we…?"
Over at the mall, Leni was with her friends.
"This trip couldn't have come at a better time," Leni said being her usual cheery self, "most of my other outfits were burnt nearly to a crisp. I couldn't be caught dead wearing any of those in public…. Hmm… Unless maybe I wore them to a barbecue? Or maybe a tanning salon!"
As they walked, coming near a janitor who had just finished mopping and drying the floor and was putting away the wet floor sign, Leni also listened to what her friends had to say. They talked about the usual things, boys, cars, outfits, high school, college plans, all of which Leni had a difficult time following, since there were about three other girls in this group with her, each with their own line of stories
"Hashtag Creative Venting!" Clyde said.
It also didn't help that there were at least four other girls with her who were talking. At least she guessed there were four. They kept moving so it was hard for her to make a solid count. She simply kept up her smile while working all the information out in her head.
'Okay,' she thought, 'Becky is the one who wants to take a break with her boyfriend? No wait, that's Shelby. Then who was Becky talking about? Was it about her dad? Wait, I thought Dana was the one who had problems with her dad? Or was it her pet turtle? What was his name? George? No, George is Shelby's boyfriend. But I thought she was dating Snoopy. No, Snoopy is a cartoon character. Wait a minute? Isn't George dating Martha? Oh, right, Martha is Shelby's last name. But what was Becky talking about? Was she talking about her friend Leni? Oh right, SHE's Leni. But then who's Dana? Dana Martha? Dana George? Okay, to keep it all straight, Becky, Dana, and Shelby are all three different people. Then who's the fourth person? Oh right, herself."'
Leni needed to halt the brakes on this winding thought train before she forgot who she was. Her brain was feeling even more watery than usual.
"Anyways," Dana continued, "I just think it's weird that my parents' idea of fixing their marriage is "seeing other people".
"They never see anyone else?" Leni said, as they passed the janitor, "Do they never go outside? Does their house not have windows?"
Right as she finished her sentence, behind them, the janitor was getting ready to walk away, when he suddenly slipped on the floor, landing on his back with a thud. This caught the other girl's attention, who looked back and saw the janitor rubbing his sore back on the floor, the floor which a seconds ago was freshly dried off, now had some small puddles on it.
"I hate this place…" He grumbled to himself, getting up.
After he put the wet floor sign back on the floor, the girls shrugged off the strange event and continued on their way.
"So," Leni asked, "How's George doing?"
"Who's George?" Shelby asked.
Luna meanwhile was over at her girlfriend Sam's place, getting set up with the rest of their band in the garage. Luna was sitting on one of the amplifiers getting her guitar all tuned up. However, she was never able to shake that stiff feeling in her body. In fact, it just got harder to ignore. She looked over at her hand, trying to flex her fingers. Even that was starting to feel more difficult. This couldn't really be Arthritis could it? She hoped not. She was supposed to be a famous musician! She wasn't supposed to have a debilitating career-ending condition until she was in at least her 40's.
"Luna?"
"Whu-What?"
She looked up to see the face of her girlfriend. Seeing that face always helped her get her mind off any worrisome thought she might be having.
"Right, sorry"
The group all took their positions, and Chunk started up the recording equipment.
"Invincible Demo Tape, Take One." Luna spoke, "Alright dudes, LETS ROCK!"
On cue, Mazzy tapped her drum sticks together to set the rhythm, and the band began playing. Unfortunately, Luna seemed to be having a bit of trouble. Her stiff fingers were making it difficult for her to get the right tones.
"Cut!" she shouted, and everyone ceased what they were doing.
"Just give me a second mates…"
She pressed her hands together hard, hoping to pop out whatever was causing this sensation in her hands. Finally, pressing hard enough against her knuckles, she heard a loud crunch, causing her eyes to go wide. It was definitely louder than any normal knuckle crack. Actually it sounded more like crumbling rock. She was terrified she may have dislocated her hand. But then why didn't she feel any pain? Luna nervously looked at her hand, and it looked just fine. Everything was in the right place and her fingers were flexing like normal now.
"Oh thank god… I can't lose this hand. It's my favorite hand."
"Lunes?" Sam asked concerned, "you good?"
"Yeah, I'm all rad now!"
So the band reset themselves to go again.
"Invincible Demo Tape, Take Two."
So Mazzy once again got things going with her drumsticks and the rest of the band got ready to jam. Once the beat started, everyone got to playing their respective instruments, and Luna took an intense strum on her guitar. But when she did, it seemed to break right in two in her hands, causing the rest of the bandmates to halt. Luna held up and looked at the broken piece of her guitar with a confused look on her face, while her friends looked in shock.
"Uhhh…" She muttered
"Any chance you can do that at the end of every show?" Sully asked.
Finally, Lori and Lincoln made it to the Twenty-Blah-Blah Royal Woods State Fair.
"C'mon!" Lori called out in frustration, how hard it is to find a parking space!?
Eventually, they managed to find a space, and the two of them got out and headed for the fairgrounds. It was located at local farm with market booths and carnival games set up. Over at the ticket booth, Clyde was waiting for them, along with their other friends, Liam, Rusty, Zach and Stella. Also with them was Latino-American Bobby Santiago and his kid sister Ronnie Anne, who was leaning by one of the booths, bored out of her mind from waiting for Lincoln. Bobby meanwhile was sweating in anticipation for seeing Lori.
"Bobby," Ronnie Anne said, "You need to get a grip."
"Hm? Oh, yeah, I'm alright, It's just that I'm still not used to seeing her in person so infrequently."
Ronnie had to admit, she did feel the same way about Lincoln.
"You're so obsessive, you may as well just build a shrine to her in your room."
"I thought about it, but I decided it might just come across as creepy."
Clyde made a note-to-self: get rid of the shrine.
Bobby, as previously mentioned, had a very laid back personality, of course he could also get very overly emotional, sort of like Lori, who he was desperately devoted to. When he took Lori to see Manchetser by the Sea, he cried like a baby, and the opening titles hadn't even finished yet. He was hardly what some might call "masculine" but he was a kind-hearted young man, and that almost made up for his lack of street smarts. Awkward, absent-minded, and gullible, her could make some pretty poor judgements, like when he and Lori ran out of gas at the side of the road, and he gave his credit card to a guy riding a scooter wearing bike shorts and a trench coat to find the nearest gas station and bring them back some with their gas canister. He never came back, they had to walk all the way home, and the next day, Bobby discovered he was now technically the owner of an imported tanning bed. Aside from Lori, Bobby was also very fond of Lincoln, whom he considered to be like a bro to him.
His sister, Ronnie Anne was more of a tough kid than her brother. Back when the young skateboarder went to the same school as Lincoln, she was known as "The Toughest Girl in School", who most of the other kids were afraid to cross. She delivered her first knuckle sandwhich to the clown at her first birthday when he "took her nose". Back in the day, Ronnie Anne would frequently pick on and humiliate Lincoln at School. Of course, what most of the other kids didn't realize was that the two of them actually had quite a crush on each other, something the two of them gradually worked up the courage to open up more to each other about their feelings, and ended up becoming friends. Behind the rough exterior, she was actually a pretty sensitive and insecure girl.
A few months ago, the two of them along with her mom moved to Great Lakes City, much to the absolute devastation of Lori. It was a bit of a transition figuring out how to maintain long-distance relationships, but they've all stayed very well in touch.
"Boo-Boo Bear!" Lori called out running over to her long-distance boyfriend, nearly tackling him to the ground with a hug.
"Babe, I missed you so much!"
The two of them just stood there, hand in hand gushing and giggling over each other.
"I've been thinking about you every day, Lori said, even though she sent him texts about how she's thinking about him every day.
Lincoln and Ronnie just stood there looking at their older siblings in utter embarrassment.
"So," Ronnie said, looking over to Lincoln, "It's been quite a while Lame-O"
"Yeah, too long." Lincoln responded, Blushing.
He had to admit, seeing her made him feel lighter than air.
"Alright," Lori said to the younger group, "Here's 30 dollars. Stay together, don't take drugs, don't talk to strangers, something something… We'll meet back up at about 2."
Lori was in a rush to get some alone time with her sweet Bobby. Plus she didn't like that angry and jealous look Clyde was giving him.
"You better treat her right…" Clyde said to him, trying to sound intimidating, and failing.
So the children went over to check out all the excitement, while the two lovebirds went over to the more calm areas of the event.
"So, what?" Lisa said, sitting on the couch with her dad, "I'm supposed to just sit here and do nothing to contribute to the furthering of society?"
"No, you're supposed to engage with me in conversation."
"Pertaining to what exactly? You never seem to listen to any of my lectures on the field of Quantum Mechanics."
"Well, I was thinking that maybe the two of us could talk to each other as… equals… or once… Talk more about how we might be feeling."
"I feel annoyed that in the midst of a life-altering discovery I am forced into this state of personal and professional limbo."
"Um… Okay, let's talk about that."
'Ugh…' she thought, 'human interaction, the eye of the black hole.'
Just then, the light on the lamp over by the table went out.
"Aw you've got to be kidding me," Lynn complained, "I thought I just replaced this."
Lynn got up and removed the shade from the lamp.
"Tell you what," he said, "we can start on our father-daughter bonding by replacing this dang lightbulb."
"While this sort of menial maintenance is insultingly far below my level of expertise, it would provide a brief reprieve from this psychological torment."
'Sometimes I don't know who's more depressing' Lynn thought, 'Lucy or Lisa?'
So the two of them got to work to unscrew the bulb, but as Lisa touched it, it seemed to turn back on.
"Oh!" Lynn said, "Well that's better!"
Lisa removed her hand and then the light went out, confusing them both.
"Huh?" Lynn muttered.
He tried to jiggle around with the bulb himself, but it didn't seem to come back on.
"Lisa, what exactly did you do?"
"I am uncertain Male Parental Unit, I just touched it and-"
As she touched it again, it once again turned on, and when she removed it again, it turned back off. She repeated this a few more times, with the same result, while Lynn couldn't get it to turn on once.
"This is indeed a peculiar set of events," Lisa stated.
Lynn was baffled, but they may as well just remove it. So he unscrewed the bulb completely and handed it over to her daughter. But as soon as she took hold of it, it once again turned on, in her hand, with no apparent power source.
Lynn was speechless, while Lisa was simply trying to make sense of this phenomena. She had to wipe her glasses and blink to make sure she wasn't seeing things. But once she blinked, the light clicked off. Now Lisa was getting frustrated, if there was one thing she hated, it was something she couldn't explain. When she blinked again, the light turned back on. This repeated every time she blinked.
"Now this is teetering on the absurd."
She blinked it back o one more time. As she focused more on the bulb, it seemed to only get brighter and brighter, in fact, much brighter than it was usually capable of. The light became almost blinding until finally, the bulb burst, sending pieces all over the living room. Luckily, none of the shrapnel hit either of them. All that was left in Lisa's hand was the bottom end of the bulb with the shattered wires still making some tiny sparks. The two of them looked at each other in total shock.
Lisa was starting to get the feeling that the explosion did more to them than she initially diagnosed.
"Lisa!" Rita called from the kitchen, keeping Lily company in her high chair, while she waited for the Luans soup to finish microwaving, "You better not be blowing anything up in there!"
"No Female Parental Unit!"
Rita let out an exasperated sigh. Sometimes she wondered if it would be easier if they were all just combined into one being. They'd at least be easier to look after.
*DING!*
Rita smiled and grabbed the soup from the microwave, steaming, piping hot and fresh. It was a good thing we still had some left over. Come to think of it, Lori should have just microwaved the soup last night. Oh well, at least she has it now for Luan.
"Okay Lily, Mommy's gonna be upstairs with Luan for a little bit, but I'll be right back down, and Daddy's right in the other room."
Lily simply giggled waving her hands about. Then her mom went to tend to her ailing daughter. Once she left, a mysterious little light slowly began illuminating the room. A light that was coming from Lily.
"Hmm?" she muttered, looking down at where the light was coming from.
She held up her tiny little baby hands to witness them beginning to glow and twinkle. As she witnessed this seemingly magical event happen, she smiled and giggled in absolute wonder, while the light started to spread down her arms.
"Bright Light!" She laughed.
Back at the fair, the kids were having a great time. They took a tractor ride, watched a sheep shearing, partook in some carnival games, and they even got to see a large steam powered device with spinning conveyor gears and frequently hissing steam, which the sign said was the world's first pacemaker. Now the bunch of them were walking along the booths, all carrying some fair merchandise and food.
"Man, this place is awesome," Liam, the farm boy, said. "It's so huge compared to our farm. We're just barely able to pay Lloyd the rent."
Lloyd is a horse.
"So Ronnie," Lincoln said, "How is life in the city?"
"A little overwhelming. You really don't appreciate these sort of wide open spaces until you find yourself surrounded by large buildings."
"You are doing okay there though right?"
"Yeah of course. I've been adjusting well, I made some new friends, and it's a pretty good school."
"Wow… It almost sounds like you're making a whole new start there."
"More or less, I mean, I had a rep at Royal Woods, and it had its advantages and disadvantages. There were times where I was cool with it, but sometimes I wished things were different. At Great Lakes, I kind of get to start with a clean slate. But… It's a little terrifying. I mean, I know we had a difficult dynamic, but I look back fondly on those times."
"Sounds like someone's having a bit of an identity crisis."
"Hey, don't test me Lame-O. I can give you a wedgie so deep, your underwear will be coming out your mouth."
"See? You haven't changed THAT much."
Ronnie just glared over at him, cracking her knuckles.
"…And I never want you to!" Lincoln quickly shouted, correcting himself.
Ronnie smiled and nodded in approval.
"Phew, Crisis Averted," he said to the readers.
What none of them noticed was the air from that relieved exhale he took traveled fast and strongly across the fairgrounds, knocking over an outhouse, revealing the man inside sitting on the toilet.
As they caught up on old times, the group passed a booth where a man was displaying a giant scale.
"Step right up, step right up! Beat the Guesser! Watch me guess your weight right here right now! Fool me and win a prize!"
Ronnie raised Lincoln's arm.
"He'll do it!"
"What the- Ronnie!"
"C'mon! It'll be hilarious!"
Lincoln just rolled his eyes as the rest of the group egged him on. He relented and went up to the booth.
"Now then!" the guesser observed the boy, "Have you tried the fair's exclusive corn syrup popcorn."
"Yeah actually."
"Alright, that adds about 10 pounds to my estimate."
"What?"
"Hmmm…." The guesser thought hard, "I estimate that you weigh about 92.7 pounds."
'If it was Ronnie-Anne up here,' Lincoln thought, 'This guy would be on a gurney now.
"And now, without further ado, please board the scale."
And so, Lincoln stepped onto the scale, hoping to prove him wrong, and the needle moved. The results were a surprise to everyone.
Turns out the guesser was way off. According to the scale, he weighed about 49.5 pounds, a little over half of what he guessed.
"That can't be right," the guesser said, "stand back a second."
Lincoln stepped off the scale so that the guesser could stand there himself. He weighed about 128.9 pounds. Fairly average adult weight. It seemed to be working just fine. So he directed Lincoln to step up again. This time, his weight was even lower. 47.2 pounds.
"Let me try." Clyde said.
He stepped up onto the scale, and his weight was much closer to the carnie's guess, minus about 10 pounds. He didn't eat the corn syrup popcorn. Then Lincoln got on with him, and the needle rose only 47 pounds higher.
After the guesser accused him of cheating somehow, and some arguing between him and the kids, he caved and gave Lincoln his prize, an Uddy the Moo-Cow Plush.
"Wow Lincoln!" Rusty said, "how did you do that?"
"I- I don't know…"
He was starting to feel very uneasy. He wasn't dying was he?
Meanwhile, Lori and Bobby were strolling hand in hand through the farm's river and fields, where people were taking in the more scenic parts of the area. Lori had a freshly scooped ice cream cone in her hand.
"I think the toughest part of living in a city apartment," Bobby said, is that sometimes when I feel my phone vibrating and I check to see if it's you, it's just the subway running beneath the building."
Lori wished she could live in this moment forever. Lori felt truly lucky to have a guy like Bobby. Yes, the guy has some weird quirks, and if he tried to defend her honor against anyone, he'd probably get his ass handed to him in seconds, but he was nothing but kind, has come through for her many times, and has shown so much patience even when she hadn't. She remembered when she first met him during freshman year. She remembered that dorky boy with the thick glasses, the checkered sweater vest, his orthodontic headgear, and corrective leg braces, and she remembered how upset she was when she saw him beating up Bobby. At first he pitied him, then that pity turned into a genuine friendship, and then that friendship blossomed into a romance. Bobby leaving for the city was one of the most gut wrenching moments of her life. Any chance she can have like this, to hold him close to her, she wasn't going to take it for granted.
She couldn't help but feel warm all over.
"Hey Boo Boo Bear?"
"Yeah?"
"Be honest with me. Um… do you think I have… anger issues?"
Bobby froze a bit, nervously thinking of what to say.
"Well…"
*Flashback*
Lori and Bobby are at the speaker in the Drive-Thru at the Burpin' Burger.
"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO DECIDE WHEN BREAKFAST IS OVER!?" Lori yelled into the speaker, while Bobby just sat there, a bit frightened.
*Flashback Over*
"...Uh… Not all the time."
"What does that mean?"
"Well, you're probably the most passionate person I've ever known, and that's always been what I've loved most about you, even if you do… overreact sometimes."
"Are you sure it's just sometimes?"
"Um… Okay… Actually quite a bit, but-"
"I mean, you haven't seen me in my worst moments, which is usually at home with my siblings. I can't tell you how many times I've threatened to turn Lincoln into a "Human Pretzel".
'Huh,' Bobby thought, 'Human Pretzel. Sounds like the title of a low budget body horror film.
"Babe, It's not like you've ever actually physically hurt them right?"
"No… I mean. Technically I've never followed through or even intended to follow through… But sometimes I see their reaction, and it almost looks like they really are afraid I might do something to them… And then the idea that I might actually end up hurting someone… It terrifies me, and then I start to have doubts about myself as a person, then I shelter myself in my room, then I text with you to get my mind off it, then someone else comes and does something to tick me off when I just wanna be left alone, and then im yelling, and then someone else is yelling, and… I dunno. I mean, I make a lot of excuses for myself."
"Okay Lori, just calm down." Bobby said, putting his hands on her shoulders and looking at her with those well-meaning eyes.
Seeing that face, and that smile, always made her feel like things were going to be okay.
"Okay, yes, you do have issues, and it can be a bit… much sometimes. But I know how much you care about your siblings, your siblings know how much you care about them, and I know that you know how much you care about them."
"I- Yeah… I do care about them." She smiled.
The two of them rested their arms on each other's shoulder and looked out at the running river. Lori felt really lucky to have a guy like Bobby.
She brought up her ice cream to take a leak, but to both of their surprise, it had already completely melted in her hand. It wasn't even that hot out.
"Echh!" Lori grunted, trying to wipe off her hand.
"Hey Lincoln?" Clyde asked, "Do you think we're dragging this out too much?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean we've written over 18 pages for this chapter. Anymore and we would have to split it into different issues."
"Don't be ridiculous Clyde, we wouldn't be so cruel to just leave people hanging like that."
TO BE CONTINUED
The Loud House and associated characters belong to Nickelodeon and Chris Savino
The L-Ementals Co-Created by AxelGripp, Bry-Guy-1996, Syfyman2xxx, and Khialat
Liquid Leni Created by Khialat and juribelit