CHAPTER 27
"What do you mean he has absconded?" Darcy fixed Richard with a frustrated glare as he rose from Bingley's desk at Netherfield.
"It is 3 days since he has been seen, Darce. Forster has neither the men nor the inclination to mount a serious manhunt. He probably took off right after I confronted him in the mess." Darcy's frustration boiled over as his fist pounded the desk.
"What the devil did you do that for? I asked you to come and help me strategise, not tip him off! His propensity for revenge against me knows no bounds. I needed a way to end him without risking Georgie's reputation!" He turned to the window and ran a hand through his hair. "Now he is at liberty, and I will have to keep watching my back until he turns up again, and he will turn up again, Richard. He was incapable of leaving well enough alone when he had 4000 pounds in his pocket, he's like my own harbinger of doom. I know not what bizarre quirk of fate led him to join the one militia that was wintering in the very village nearest to the estate that my friend chose to lease and invite me to, not even one year after that confounded disaster in Ramsgate! It's like a gothic novel, for heaven's sake. I need to finish it. I can't have this hanging over my head while I try to build a life with the very woman who was almost convinced against me by his outrageous slander."
"I am sorry Darcy, I saw him sitting with the enlisted men and I just needed to get my hands on him. It was all I could do not to run him through right then and there." Richard sighed heavily as he dropped onto the couch next to the fire. "I have written to the Runners - you know he is hiding in London, there's nowhere better for him to lay low, but we know his haunts. I will track him down."
"I need to speak to Elizabeth. I will return to London ahead of schedule and do what needs to be done to further the search. She will understand. I have Mrs Younge's information in my safe at Darcy House, among other things. He's had a 3-day head start, Richard. We leave at first light."
The Netherfield party were due to attend a supper and card party at Longbourn that evening. Darcy arrived early with Charles, as was their privilege as fiancés of the eldest daughters of the house, but due to the matronly attentions of Mrs Bennet was unable to politely arrange to have a private conversation before other guests had arrived. Seated together at the pianoforte, whilst others gathered at card tables throughout the house, Elizabeth played a movement from memory, fudging her way through the entire piece as she and Darcy discussed his intentions.
"But why must you leave, Fitz? Why is it your responsibility?" She worked hard to keep the fear out of her voice.
"Because the fault is mine, Lillybeth, and so must the remedy be." He saw the fear, and he leaned towards her, surreptitiously caressing her arm as she played, "I will not endanger myself, Elizabeth, but I want to be on hand as I will be calling in his debts when he is found, charging him before the law. It has been my mistaken pride, my desire to not dishonour the memory of my father by pursuing his beloved godson, that has created new victims at every turn. Even when he - with Georgie…" He broke off, unable to continue before he conquered his rising emotion. Elizabeth leaned towards him but continued to play, as she knew their private conversation could only continue as she played. It was obvious to anyone who watched and listened that something else was going on at the pianoforte but as those who noticed loved them best, they were able to continue with the polite fiction that he was merely turning pages for her. His head dropped closer to hers as he breathed in the calm he always found in her presence.
"I feared for her future so much that I did not pursue him. No more, Lillybeth, I will not continue to cover up for his crimes. I cannot prosecute him for any of his moral crimes, but I knew this day would eventually come. I would not have kept all my receipts for his debts, I would not have saved every scrap of information I have been privy to about his depraved lifestyle and his associates, if I did not know that Wickham would lead me to this point. I am ashamed that I let it go on so long, that only when my fears for his disruption of my life, my happiness, are now sufficient for me to bring it to an end, on my terms, and not his. I am not sure if it wasn't cowardice, rather than the loftier notions of compassion or a naive hope he would one day reform, that stayed my hand." She shook her head briefly but with vehemence. "No, my dearest, I am resolved, I will no longer wait for him to intrude upon my notice, I will not be swayed from this course, and I will not allow his bitterness and spiteful entitlement to ruin what have been some of the happiest moments of my life thus far, and what I know will be the happiest life I can ever hope for, with you. I will protect you, and our family, Elizabeth. From at least this known enemy of our future, I must."
Elizabeth had struggled to keep her countenance and continue playing through this impassioned, whispered speech. She blinked back tears at the force of his emotions and finally nodded her approbation and understanding, even if she could not bear the thought of his departure and knew her own fears would make his absence that much harder to endure. She whispered her heart's desires, "I want to come with you, Fitz. I want to be able to comfort you as you go through this, to be near enough to able to listen and assist in any way I can. To not have to wait for the post to arrive every morning to hear how you are!"
"I confess I would like this also, Lillybeth, but I am planning to leave at first light tomorrow as Wickham has not been seen for 3 days. He has had time to go to ground in London, I know some of his haunts there, it is my best and only chance to assist in his discovery. I have no idea what penalties there are for leaving his militia regiment without permission, but I think it is less than in the Regulars and Richard knows Forster is unable to pursue him, so it is up to me. I have no idea how long this will take. It is possible I will not be able to return before our plans for you and Jane to come to London again take place. Forgive me, Elizabeth, it is not my intent to abandon you during our engagement in Hertfordshire or give offense to your family or your friends. I am happy for you to share my purpose in leaving, as fully and as openly as you can, if you think it wise or helpful in mitigating any aggrieved reactions. I am aware I am exposing you to further malicious gossip, but the timing cannot be helped."
He looked at her as she played, wishing he could give her more comfort, but he saw the moment her resolve took shape and her courage rose to meet this next challenge. Through it all she played, and as she chose to segue to the close of this symphony, the parts of which she had played in a varied order and with greater repetition than the composer intended, her face had regained its calm and steady countenance. Before the closing bars, she glanced about the room, noting the general inattention towards them and took the opportunity to brush her lips against his cheek, clearly needing to express her love without words. He squeezed the arm he had never relinquished and as she played the final notes, dropped his hand to her leg, briefly squeezing it in an answering gesture of intimacy.
"Oh, my love, I will be praying for you and the Colonel, for success, for a speedy resolution and for as little mortification as possible, though I know that will probably not be answered to my satisfaction, so I will pray for strength also. If you are not returned within the week and have not much hope of a resolution at that time, I will consider moving up our scheduled shopping week in London and maybe we can hope for a brief return to Longbourn together once more, before our fixed engagements in London begin and we enter into a different kind of battle." Her resolution, her dignity and her willingness to release him without further complaint, filled his heart with peace, and allowed him to immediately focus on the pressing matter at hand, trusting all to her judgment and good sense and praying for her strength and faith in him to be fulfilled.