AN: This one leans heavily into the Hurt/Comfort genre, so take out your cheesy hats :)
He counted the markers as he jumped through his Hiraishin tags, in instinct, mind whirling ahead – if it were up to him, he'd teleport her right down half the Land of Fire and to Konoha's hospital, but their platoon at the border needed to know she had been found.
It took him no more than a few minutes and then he was mentally reaching out for the final Hiraishin marker on the kunai he had left with Shikadai Nara. The last jump didn't carry him back to the tiled conference room of the Grassland Outpost however, Minato finding himself crouched over a leaf-covered forest floor instead.
His eyes drifted down to Kushina first, in instinct, affirming she was okay – her breathing was shallow, ragged, interspersed with winces, her skin clammy and feverish to the touch, but she was still conscious.
And then his senses registered the chaos about him. He froze, his grip on her tightening subconsciously as his eyes narrowed, casting a cold look around.
Shikadai Nara was standing next to him, staring at him incredulously. And even in the gathering dusk he could see they were surrounded by Konoha nin on all sides, facing off a similarly-sized platoon of Sunagakure men ahead of them. They were all armed, faces drawn in contempt, killing intent roiling about.
It took him but a second to take it all in, his mind already rushing through options should fighting break out, when the people around him reacted, coming out of the shocked stupor his appearance had brought on.
"The Yellow Flash!"
"He found her!"
"Is she alive?"
"Get a medic!"
"Well, it seems this solves your little problem, doesn't it, Third Hokage?"
The last voice had been low and cold, filled with unguarded vitriol, and Minato fixed the man who had spoken with a wary look. His eyes widened briefly as they moved from his gray-clad form to the triangular Kage hat resting on his head, the kanji for "Wind" adorning its front. There was golden dust twirling haphazardly in the air about him, now reflected in the lit torches around.
The Fourth Kazekage was standing in front of his squad, arms crossed before his chest, a look of sharp intent upon him as he regarded Kushina with narrowed eyes.
Minato felt the fine hairs on the back of his neck rising, the fury sweeping through him like a boom as his eyebrows furrowed, teeth clenching at the clear antagonism in the man's eyes. Kazekage he may be, but if he thought he could lay a finger on her-
A few men around him shifted uncomfortably, taking a step sideways and away from him and Minato realised he had let his own bloodlust spill forth uncontrollably, killing intent swirling around him unchecked.
The Kazekage noticed too, lifting an eyebrow in a clear challenge at the young man who dared stare him down so openly-
Another figure appeared before him, a black-clad man moving sideways and positioning himself directly before Minato and Kushina, momentarily hiding the Kazekage from view. He rested the end of a long battle-staff on the ground beside his feet, and Minato blinked in surprise.
Out of the corner of his eyes he spotted Shikadai's hand twitching at his thigh, before forming the signs for Calm Down in Konoha standard sign talk, and he had to consciously will himself rational.
He took a deep breath, fixing his look on the Hokage's back instead.
Sandaime had donned his battle uniform, the two long streamers of his forehead protector falling over the "Fire" Kage hat slung over his back.
"It's good to see you've returned to us, Minato." Hiruzen Sarutobi said casually, levelly, without turning, his eyes never leaving the Kazekage ahead. "How is Kushina-san?"
He swallowed thickly.
"Badly injured, but alive, sir."
His voice wavered only once as he fought to suppress the cold anger raging inside.
"That's good to hear."
"And where did you find her, pray tell?" Danzō Shimura broke through on his left, amidst their ranks of men.
"Land of Wind."
Chaos erupted all around, men shouting on both sides, the wall of noise crashing over them in waves. Over the Hokage's shoulder he caught a glimpse of the Kazekage rising his arm high up in the air, golden sand swirling around it with a buzz before dispersing amongst his own ranks – a signal that his men clearly recognised, because they quieted down, just as Hiruzen Sarutobi slammed the end of his staff in the ground, a burst of chakra vibrating at their soles, stilling the Konoha nin as well.
"You don't seem very surprised, Kazekage-sama." Sandaime said once silence reigned again.
"I'm not."
Minato could clearly feel the shinobi around him bristling, their chakra sharpening with intent.
"You admit to kidnapping her then!" Koharu Utatane near-snarled, appearing on the Hokage's right.
"I admit no such thing." The Kazekage corrected her coolly. "I stated I don't have her. I never claimed I don't know where she is."
"You'll sit there debating semantics of all things-" the older woman started, but Sandaime silenced her with a quick wave of his hand.
"Care to explain yourself, Kazekage-sama?"
And despite the calmness in his voice, Minato could hear the sharp edge beneath, cold threat radiating from Hiruzen Sarutobi's posture and from his very core.
"I don't believe I'm the one who should offer explanations." the man said harshly.
He reached into an inside pocket of his robe, bringing out a rolled-up scroll. It shuddered in his hand, specs of gold swirling at its edges, picking up the paper as if on strings and carrying it forth across the empty strip of land between the two platoons. The Hokage snatched it out of the air, unrolling it in a swift move.
"I received this note from a squad stationed with the reserve platoon I sent out with my delegates. Roughly two hours after noon, four days prior, they felt a burst of vast energy close to the hard border, upon which they went to investigate. They found a group of masked Konoha shinobi attempting Fūinjutsu of unknown effects; your ANBU attacked, killing four of their squad. My men retreated back to our border only to find Konoha's Jinchūriki, half transformed, having crossed on our territory no less."
With that the man paused, levelling Konoha's Kage and his advisors with a cold look in turn.
"Their squad leader sent people back to camp, to establish chain of events, at which time they found out Suna's esteemed elders were being held in Land of Fire territory while Konoha men were searching our camp with baseless kidnapping accusations when the girl had crossed the border herself. In light of your keeping hostages-"
"We didn't keep hostages!" Koharu Utatane bit out in disgust.
The Kazekage's lips twitched.
"Since our elders were detained," he amended sardonically, "my men decided to take the Jinchūriki inland and inform me of the turn of events instead. I wrote back to them, specifically instructing them to keep her alive and secure as I set out for the border to find out what had happened myself. Which, dare I say, is more than most Kage would have done in my place, prior to any peace treaties being signed."
Sandaime took a few minutes to inspect the letter, passing it wordlessly to Koharu as well while other voices rose around.
"Bullshit."
"That's awfully convenient-"
Minato felt the anger crashing at him in waves, ebbing at his composure. He'd ordered them to keep her alive, yes, but for what? And in what state?
The injustice of what they'd done to her twisted a jagged knife in his insides and for a moment he wanted nothing more but to be the monster his enemies painted him out to be – to deal out vengeance in merciless strokes.
"So let me get this straight, Kazekage-sama, if I may." Shikadai Nara drawled out as the noise quieted down. "You claim you were going to make sure Ebizō and Chiyo Kinyama were safe and you were then going to return Kushina Uzumaki to us?"
His voice was full of thinly-veiled scepticism, which the Kazekage met with a flat look.
"Naturally." was all he said, which prompted a snort from Koharu Utatane. He ignored her. "This is what transpired instead: your man here infiltrated our land, crossing borders without permission. What happened after that, I can only guess at."
With that he took a step sideways, fixing Minato with an icy look.
"Need I ask what happened to the men protecting her?"
Minato held his look, eyes narrowed, jaw squared. The men protecting her? He wanted to scoff at the choice of words.
"Dead."
And for once he felt no remorse at having taken more lives.
The Kazekage let the word hang, the brief silence turning charged.
"I figured." he said, a bite of iron in his tone. "So tell me, Hokage-sama, why is it you think I need to explain myself? When in the wake of peace negotiations your Jinchūriki crossed our border, unleashed a Biju and tried to attack my men-"
"I didn't-" Kushina started through a broken whisper, her voice all but drowned out, but Minato didn't miss Shikadai Nara casting a quick look at her.
"-while your ANBU killed Suna shinobi on patrol and Konoha's Yellow Flash infiltrated our land to assassinate even more of my men? Give me a good reason why Sunagakure shouldn't retaliate right here, right now?"
Minato straightened, a wave of heated tension coursing through him, the anticipation of the battle thrumming under his skin – he wanted a reason to fight them, to make them pay for what she had endured, to make them regret ever having touched her-
But-
But they had been trying to negotiate a peace treaty.
Peace. Jiraya's dream. His dream.
At what cost?
So you'd treat with someone, even if they hurt the ones you loved most?
It seemed as if it had been ages since they had sat in her room, talking the hypotheticals of war and peace. Her question came back to him now, near blindsiding him in how apt it was. The memory stilled the breath in his lungs, clashing with the burning rage.
If it were that, or war… I believe- I hope I could find the strength to do so, yes.
He gritted his teeth, casting another look at her. She was injured, hurt, teetering on the edge of consciousness – if fighting broke out, he had to get her out; he had to get her help. She came first, no matter what.
It took him a moment before he exhaled, consciously willing himself rational, taking the rage and wrapping it in calm, burying it deep down.
He felt Chōgo Akimichi shift forward, moving imperceptibly to stand on Minato's left, his fingers curling around his battle club. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see Danzō-sama raising his hand tentatively to one side, ready to give a signal to his men, Konoha nin brandishing their steel-
"Iwagakure." Shikadai Nara broke through, almost spitting the word out.
The Kazekage turned a sharp look at him.
"Iwagakure? The Land of Earth is your reason?"
"Kushina Uzumaki didn't cross the border to attack your men. She did so because she was attacked and made to lose control of her Bijū." the black-haired strategist explained in a clipped tone.
The Kazekage's eyebrows lifted in a bout of surprised scepticism.
"Was she now?"
"Yes. By Iwagakure. Our men are collecting evidence as we speak, but clues point to their involvement. They likely found out about the negotiation and tried to break it off by killing our men and posing as them to lure Kushina Uzumaki in a trap. For us, it would appear that Suna kidnapped our Jinchūriki… while Suna would assume that she attacked you unprovoked."
Minato could feel the frown frozen on his own face, lips twisting with the information presented – a falsehood, he was certain of it, for there had been no trace of Iwagakure's involvement at all. Or was he missing something?
His mind was rushing ahead, linking what he knew with what was being said, the conclusion presenting itself glaringly in his head: Konoha couldn't afford to admit insurrection amidst their ranks. They needed a scapegoat if the negotiation was to go on.
Shikadai Nara was doing his best to make it so. To ensure peace.
The Kazekage was silent, chewing over the information with an icy look on his face.
"You expect me to take it at face-value that your out-of-control Jinchūriki was on my land, but wasn't sent there by you to attack my men?"
"Just as you expect me to take it at face-value that you were going to return her to Konoha as a gesture of good will." Sandaime countered calmly.
From where he was standing, Minato had no trouble making out how the Kazekage's lips twitched into a wry smile, just as Kushina shifted in his hands.
"Iwagakure… It's not… true." she whispered against his neck, straining to get the word out.
He shut his eyes resolutely, eyebrows furrowing. And then he lowered his head, lips brushing against her hair, close to her ear.
"For Konoha." he muttered, wondering why the words tasted so ashen in his mouth.
She took in a shuddering breath and for a moment he wondered if she had heard him at all. But then she nodded once, her eyes fluttering closed once again as she propped her head on his shoulder, her breathing hitching in her chest.
And then her grip at his clothes went slack, her form sagging in his arms.
"So, here's my proposal instead…" Sarutobi Hiruzen was saying from up ahead, but his voice sounded distant all of a sudden, unimportant, as dread rushed Minato, clawing at him viciously.
A high-pitched ringing had started in his ears, the coldness clenching in his stomach with a vice-like grip.
"Sandaime-sama." he choked out, and his voice must have held every ring of alarm, because the Hokage paused abruptly, not hesitating for a second.
"Get her back to Konoha at once."
She slipped out of a blissfully dreamless sleep, for once not laced with confusion. Her eyelids felt leaden as she tried to lift them, exhaustion tugging at her and trying to lure her back over. But it was her thirst that had woken her, sharp and intent in her throat, and her eyebrows furrowed at the sensation of parched dryness along with the various dull aches coursing through her body.
Her look fixed on a darkened ceiling, dimmed with the palette of night. A machine was beeping somewhere to her left and she could feel rather than see, the cables connected to her form, announcing medical intervention of some sort.
And then it all came crashing back, the memories of the mission and of her capture and of the following delirious escape. Her eyes widened, her breath hitching in her throat, muscles clenching in place as her mind reeled in confusion.
She had dreamt- She had dreamt of Minato- Minato who was dead- But he wasn't dead, he had been sitting with her under the cherry bloom and he had danced with her at Bon Odori- But that had been a drug-laced dream, she had been in a cell and he- he had gotten her out- Hadn't he? Hadn't he?
The images crashed over her all at once, interposed over one another, blending in a mess of perceptions and her heart stuttered unevenly in her chest, breathing picking up with her racing pulse. The machine at her side frenzied away, beeping increasing to announce her distress as she pushed to sit up-
"Kushina?"
A figure shifted beside her, appearing soundlessly by her side, and her head snapped up in surprise, taking him in with a crazed look.
The moonlight filtering through the window had silvered the gold of his locks, draining the blue of his eyes, casting his face in shadow, but she could make out the burning worry in his look.
"Minato-" she croaked out in alarm, and oh Gods, her voice was an absolute ruin.
Her fingers grasped at his sleeve in instinct – solid, wonderfully solid – just as he sat beside her at the edge of the bed, propping her form with a firm hand before her attempts at unruliness could land her on the floor.
"I'm here. You're in Konoha. You're safe, I promise." he murmured quietly as she slumped against him.
And for a second all she could feel was his scent and the warmth of his chakra under her touch, and his soft voice, his lips moving quietly by her temple. There was something odd about the way he had phrased his words, and her eyebrows furrowed in instinct. But the thought kept eluding her, her head throbbing, feeling unusually heavy as it lulled over his shoulder.
And then the door opened with a firm fling, the lights of the room flickering to life. Kushina hissed, eyes shutting closed in instinct.
"Her heart-rate monitor alerted-" someone was saying as two pairs of footsteps entered the room, taking a few determined strides inside before pausing. "Namikaze-san?!"
Minato's voice was all calm pleasantness and Kushina could almost hear the smile on his face as he greeted them with "Good evening, Tanaka-sensei, Aro-san."
She blinked her eyes open, forehead creasing with the discomfort of the sudden glare of the lights. Two medics were standing not far from her bed, one holding a medical chart and looking too surprised for words while the other seemed positively vexed. And, both of them were blissfully stable, doing her the favour of not blurring at the edges or swimming before her eyes. The walls were also kindly not spinning for once.
Good. So the damned drugs had finally worn off.
"How did you-"
"We informed you that visiting hours were over after 6pm!" the older woman said sternly, fixing two fists at her hips.
"Ah, is that so? My apologies, I must have misunderstood." Minato said calmly as Kushina's eyes fell on the solitary armchair by her bed, now left vacant – he must have sneaked in to stay with her – before she glanced up at him.
His lips were curved in an innocent smile, head cocked to one side most endearingly. As she watched, the younger medic positively blushed at the sight of him, quickly pushing a lock of hair behind one ear and straightening her pristine uniform.
And despite the aches and the exhaustion, a smile tugged at Kushina's lips. She didn't think she had seen him actually try and charm someone on purpose before, but damn he was good. The poor girl stood no chance.
The older lady seemed to have mellowed out some as well, arms finally dropping from her hips as she sighed in exhausted surrender, and Kushina felt laughter bubbling up her throat. It came out strained, resembling a dry choke more than chuckles, before quickly morphing into coughs. Minato tensed up beside her just as the two women jumped into action at the sound, nearing her like irritated bees.
Tanaka-sensei, the older medic, shooed Minato at once, her tone broaching no argument and promising physical repercussions if he resisted. He ended up backing away with a pout on his face while the healers fussed at her, puffing her pillows and, to her immense relief, bringing a glass of cool water to her lips. By the time she had gulped it down greedily, Tanaka-sensei had already gotten hold of her left hand, gingerly examining her bandaged wrist before pressing fingers at her skin to check for fever.
"I'm fine, ya know, I was just thirsty-" she started, pausing briefly at the hoarse sound of her own voice and bringing a hand up to her bandaged throat.
"It'll get back to normal, dear, nothing to worry about. Your vocal cords were strained and your throat was quite sore. Strangulation, was it?" she asked and for a second Kushina was thrown by the casual tone in which the woman had asked.
The images of the moment came back to her, seared in her mindscape along with the terror of suffocating, of needing air as her lungs burned while fighting tunnel vision, and she swallowed thickly, taking in a deep breath for good measure.
She simply nodded once and the lady tsk-ed. Even without looking she could tell Minato had fixed her with an intent look. For now, she chose to ignore him.
"Happens too often, I dare say. Give it a few days. Won't be a pretty sight for a while, but then, that's the downside to shinobi life, isn't it? Still, you're healing remarkably well! Your wrists are almost like new and you've cleared the infection. The wristbone is mostly fully mended, but you shouldn't strain it much in the next few weeks. The concussion was pretty bad and you cracked your skull I'm afraid, but we'll see how things are on the scans tomorrow- Write that down Nakoe-san, we'll run a scan first thing in the morning. But it can't be too bad if you're awake, ah?"
The lady was going off at an impressive speed, her talent at talking fast dwarfed only by the speed at which the younger medic – Nakoe Aro apparently – was taking notes on her clipboard. Still, Kushina didn't miss how Aro-san seemed to anticipate the brief pauses that Tanaka-sensei made to take in a breath, at which time the young girl didn't omit any chance to steal glances at Minato.
Kushina bit through a smile. He should be legally banned from consciously turning his charms on unsuspecting people.
"Any headache?" Tanaka-sensei continued, drawing Kushina's attention back to her.
"Oh? Um…"
She leaned over her without waiting for an answer, probing the back of her head with gentle fingers, and the redhead winced when the medic found a particularly tender spot. The older woman tsk-ed again, producing a vial of pills and practically shoving them down Kushina's throat, deaf to any and all protests.
"There now, it will dull the pain, you need your rest! We'll check out how your ribs are mending too, but I dare say you got off lightly, given the situation… Almost no stitches as well, fancy that! If all is well, we might even discharge you tomorrow! If you rest well that is," she said sharply, turning towards Minato as her eyes narrowed. "If your visitor lets you."
Minato's sweet smile was back, his hands resting casually in his pockets.
"I assure you, I'm very good at letting people rest." he said mildly.
Aro-san suppressed a giggle just as Tanaka-sensei rolled her eyes.
"Don't even think of sweet-talking your way out of this. Out with you, let the girl sleep." the older woman said, waving her hands at him in a clear shooing motion.
To Kushina's horror, Minato obliged, making to go. She tensed, eyebrows furrowing as she opened her mouth to protest-
"Certainly. I have to warn you though, I might misunderstand again." he said merrily, his lips pulling up in a lopsided smile as he stole a look at the red-haired girl while passing by her bed, before his eyes slid casually to her nightstand, and Kushina felt compelled to follow his gaze.
Her own answering smile spilled on her face as she spotted the Hiraishin kunai carefully tucked amidst the flowers and cards that her friends had left.
"Fat chance of that happening, I tell you! The seals around the building prevent anyone from Body Flickering inside so don't even try it! And I'll have the corridors watched, you hear me?" Tanaka-sensei was saying as she almost shoved Minato out the door before turning to flip the lights off once again, her rough exterior mellowing out at once. "Rest for now, dear, Nakoe-san and I will be just down the hall. Press the button if you need anything."
The room sank in comfortable darkness again and Kushina slumped against the pillows. Someone had left a window open to let the late spring air in, and, beyond the whir of the machine and the beeping of the monitor, she could also make out the rustle of the trees outside, interspersed by the song of crickets and the hoots of an owl. Calming sounds; home sounds.
She took a deep breath, fixing her eyes on the ceiling as she waited, her mind assuring her that it was not, in fact, cracked or made of stone. Her hands still moved on their own accord though, fingers running over her bandaged wrists gingerly – linen wrappings, not manacles. The soft feel of the cloth steadied her, rooting her in the present, and she felt herself relax.
The pill must have taken effect sometime too as the minutes rolled by – she could feel the aches lessening, the dull throb in the base of her skull receding only to be replaced by the soft lethargic sense of sitting amidst cotton.
She blinked, perhaps a tad too slowly, before shaking herself awake, determined to thwart sleep. She didn't know how long she waited, but it couldn't have been more than a quarter hour when she felt the soft stir of air by her side, accompanied by the warm glow of his chakra.
"Hey." Minato greeted quietly, casually, as if his appearance out of thin air was the most normal thing that could occur.
There was a hint of humour tucked in his whisper, and her lips drew up in a woozy smile subconsciously as she turned towards him.
He looked much better than the last time when he had appeared in that cave, windswept and sunburned by the merciless desert elements. The burned complexion had faded now, giving him a pleasant sun-kissed look. The shadows under his eyes had lessened too, even if they were still present – no wonder there, if he spent his nights curled up in a chair by her bed.
His look was fixed on her now, alight with happiness and a palpable touch of relief. But the spark of concern was playing there too, hidden in the tentative curve of his lips.
"You're awfully bad at understanding hospital rules, ya know." she whispered and his smile widened.
"Absolutely hopeless, I'm afraid."
He took a seat at the edge of her bed again, this time facing her, studying her eyes as his smile dropped ever-so-slightly, giving way to his worry.
"How are you feeling?"
"Like I've slept a whole month, ya know." she said through a half-suppressed yawn.
"Just five days, actually." he corrected quietly, aiming for a light tone, but she could hear the strained edge to his voice even in his whisper.
"I made you worry, ya know."
"A little." he allowed, his smile turning crooked at the obvious lie and she huffed out a laugh before biting her lip.
"Thank you. For coming back. I… I wanted…" she drawled out before the words died out in her throat.
What had she wanted? To make sure he was real? What a silly thought.
Her hand still reached forward though, without her quite willing it to, finding his in the dark and he sighed as if he had longed for her touch but hadn't dared approach her first. His fingers interlaced with her own, his hold perhaps a tad too firm as he glanced down at their twined fingers briefly. And when he looked up his expression had shifted beneath the soft moonlight, mild humour melting in favour of burning intensity as he swallowed thickly.
"Kushina…" he murmured fervently as his other hand found her face, one thumb feathering over her cheekbone, pushing a fiery lock aside. She exhaled, leaning into his touch.
"I thought I lost you." she muttered, choking on the words only slightly.
Again. How many times did this make? How did it always come to this? This time though, it had been much too real – more than fear, more than worry; because she had seen. She had seen and she had believed and she had crumbled down. She had mourned him, even if in a drug-addled way.
She hadn't meant to lay the wound quite so bare quite so quickly, but the pills were dulling her thoughts – the words had slipped out and there was no taking them back.
Minato sucked in a quiet breath, his fingers moving from her cheek to the curve of her jaw and down to her neck, tracing a light touch over the bandages, and for a second she got the impression that he was being unbearably gentle despite himself, when he wanted nothing more but to press her closer.
"I know. I… I thought the same. I thought…" he whispered, and even in the hush she could hear his voice breaking. "It doesn't matter now. You're home and you're safe."
Whatever he had meant to say, he had put a lid on it, very obviously reigning his unchecked thoughts into control, echoing his words of earlier instead and Kushina frowned. There was… something… about the way he spoke.
She wanted to ask, to make him tell her why he tensed up so if all was well, but when she opened her mouth, another yawn came forth instead of words. Tiredness battled her determination, the lethargy that had descended over her making it hard to focus, and she felt her eyelids growing heavier as she blinked slowly. And in between it all, his expression had shifted again, giving way to sweet calmness and the soft smile she so loved.
And just like that, his light-hearted mask was back.
"Besides, I was being truthful when I said I'm good at letting people rest. I wouldn't dream of lying to Tanaka-sensei."
She giggled.
"She'd skin you alive if you did, ya know. I think she might be scarier than Tsunade-sama."
"Don't let her hear you." he warned jovially and she grinned despite herself, suppressing yet another yawn. "Rest now."
"I've slept five days, 'm not tired… I just… need a few minutes…" she heard herself drawl out as she slumped back against the pillows, her eyes fluttering closed.
She heard him chuckle from somewhere far off and her lips pulled in a smile yet again. The last thing she remembered before sleep claimed her was the deep sigh that tore from his chest and the warmth of his touch as his fingers squeezed firmly about hers.
The constriction of the Hiraishin had become almost natural now, familiar in an intimate way. The air squeezed about her briefly and then they were through to the other side, stepping soundlessly in her small living room.
She took a deep breath, her nose wrinkling at the scent of the stale air signifying her absence. The curtains were drawn, but a sunray had slipped through the gap between the fabrics, outlining the dust particles swirling through the air, gilding them, and her eyes caught at the sight.
The light had crawled up the side of her, illuminating a patch of skin on her arm where the bouquets of flowers from the hospital were draped, but it didn't feel warm.
An odd sense of timelessness had accosted her, chilling her on the inside, spreading cool calm down her form. The day's frenzy of the medical tests and scans had somehow floated past her, as if she had stood oddly still, stationary in the midst of the hurry around.
It had all shown good results and she had soon insisted to be discharged, against Tanaka-sensei's worried recommendations. Kushina had ignored her; she had had enough of hospitals for a lifetime.
Minato had waited most patiently, ready to whisk her away; and even though his usual warm smile had been in place, eyes softening at the sight of her, she couldn't help but shake the feeling that something was off. It was there, in the barely-perceptible tight curve to his smiles and in the guarded wariness to his wayward looks when he thought she wouldn't notice. And she had slowly felt the cold in her unfurl that much further at the sight.
"Here, let me help." he murmured now, taking the blooms off her hands and moving to her small kitchen.
She heard the tap start, followed by the muffled gurgle of water as he filled a vase, and within moments she realised she craved the sound. The medics had probably washed her as much as they could in the hospital when tending to her wounds, because she wasn't covered in sand and dirt for once, but the sudden feeling of filth still accosted her out of the blue and she shivered.
"I'll pop in for a shower, ya know." she called out, flinching only minimally at her still-hoarse voice, and then her feet were moving brusquely, hurriedly, towards the bathroom.
She shut the door behind her, leaning on it as she exhaled a pent-up breath.
Everything looked the same as she had left it, her hairbrush abandoned by the sink, her toothbrush thrown to one side in a rush, and she realised with a start that she had somehow expected the layout to have changed in the brief time she had been gone.
Because after everything that had happened… Could it really have been just three weeks?
She peeled her clothes off slowly, wincing with the various aches still present in her muscles as she undressed, leaving the garments to pool at her feet. There was a slight tremble to her fingers as she moved to undo the bandages at her wrists and over her torso, carefully unwrapping them off her arms and neck.
Only then did she steel herself, turning towards the mirror. Her eyes widened at the sight as she sucked in a quiet breath.
Her body seemed to be comprised of more yellow and purple just then, the bruises criss-crossing over the sides of her ribs and her stomach, blooming over her thighs and her arms, standing out sharp against the paleness of her skin. More bruises adorned her face, mixing blue and yellow along one side of her jaw and up to her temple, framing her eye.
But worst of all was her neck – bruised so dark it appeared near purple in spots, it held a constellation of discolouring, the dark blotches near-resembling finger marks in places, where the man had gripped her tightest.
Sing for me, little bird, sing your song of pain.
The words echoed through her head, a hiss full of contempt which felt terribly near, as if he was whispering in her very ear, and the fine hairs on the back of her neck rose as Kushina felt the air in her small bathroom grow thinner, her throat closing off. She shot a hand up to her neck, to fight the constriction, to dig her fingers in the arm choking her off-
But there was no one there, her palm finding the marred skin of her own bare throat.
She backed away from the mirror in a rush, stumbling blindly under the shower instead. Stiff fingers found the knob and turned it without seeing, the water starting with a hiss.
It soaked her through at once, plastering her hair to her skin and she gasped, sucking in desperate breaths. The shock of heat over her icy skin helped shake off the stupor and she closed her eyes, trying to still her racing heart.
But the images were there, waiting in the dark.
The Suna nin running a hand over her face, gripping at her hair, pushing a finger in her mouth, grabbing at her leg-
Her eyes snapped open and she reached for the nearest object without seeing, automatically, grabbing at soap and a sponge. Her movements were perhaps sharper than necessary as she scrubbed at herself, not relenting even when she had been at it for a number of minutes; even when the hot water ran first lukewarm and then chilly over her form, rising gooseflesh across her skin.
She didn't know when her hands had started shaking, but all of a sudden the water was icy, running long fiery strands in her eyes, and the cold was without and within her, numbing her. And without realising it she folded up on herself, crouching in her own shower and wrapping her arms around her legs, curling in, burying her head in her knees.
Her tresses spilled all around her, twirling crimson with the running water over the floor, and for a second she likened them to rivulets of blood crawling at the water drain.
What was wrong with her? She was a shinobi, used to active combat, used to the terrors of war. She had been in near-death scenarios before; she had been hurt and beaten, she had, in fact, almost died twice in the last two years alone. And now she would crumble down?
How idiotic.
This could not- would not- break her.
Damn them all.
She didn't know how long it took her to compose herself, to carefully pick up the pieces and arrange them into her usual person, taking deep breaths. The fact that she had been thoroughly trained for just such panic attacks helped, the drilled shinobi part within her taking command eventually, ordering her to focus on small tangible things, like the smells of the soap and shampoo and on the rough feel of the tiles below her feet, rooting her in the present.
In the end she finally untangled stiff limbs, turning off the icy water and draining her hair in a few sharp twists. And as she wrapped a large towel over her form she felt, if not better, then at least more stable and collected, catching a firm grasp at her resolve.
Minato was nothing if not patient, capable of stretches of stillness in wait for what mattered, anchoring himself in collected rationality.
Yet even he had his limits, and he felt them being pushed considerably when an hour rolled by and Kushina still didn't emerge from the refuge of her own little bathroom, the hiss of running water audible on the other side.
For the first time in a while he felt restlessness take over as he rose from the armchair he had occupied, moving to stand by the window instead, trying to take his mind off things.
And yet, much as he tried to distract himself, he was still painfully aware of the water finally cutting off some minutes later, and of the quiet rustle of a towel, followed by the click of the bathroom doorhandle. The silent patter of her bare feet seemed like a drum in his ears, his whole attention focused on her alone, every fibre of his body tuned in on her presence.
She pushed the door open and Minato turned, locking the light-hearted expression back on his face-
He froze, stilling in place as he beheld her, wrapped in her overly large towel, bandage-free. His breath caught in his lungs, eyes widening, muscles locking at the sight.
He had seen her bloodied, hurt and feverish on the day when he had found her, but much of that blood hadn't been hers as a shower of red had splattered over her when his wind scythe had cut through that Suna woman's hands. At the time, he had been so overcome by relief and frenzied worry, that he hadn't really focused on the details, hadn't really looked, listening to the rasp of her breaths instead, each uneven hitch sending a spike through his chest, the fever of her skin burning through him as well.
And then he had come out of his last Hiraishin, striding madly through Konoha's hospital shouting for help, and the medics had rounded them, prying her off his hands, practically forcing him in another room even though he protested needing help. The panicked moments away from her had felt much too long before he had been able to see her again. By that time, the medics had already tended to her and he had found her wrapped in bandages, sleeping peacefully in a medical bed.
He'd stayed with her for most of the following harrowing five days, despite Tanaka-sensei's ridiculous attempts at making him leave her side.
But he hadn't really seen her prior. Hadn't really looked.
He was looking now.
The bruises on her face, bad as they were, were nothing compared to the hurt marked on her body – it was a tapestry of bruises and near-healed scrapes and cuts, their mottled colours spreading down the side of her and disappearing below the towel, crawling over her legs, speaking wordlessly of blows, and kicks, of the torture they'd inflicted on her. And her neck… her neck, which had been bandaged tight before and was now bare-
He could feel his mask slipping, the pleasant aloofness draining from his face even though he had tried so hard to keep it together, for her sake; even when he had almost slipped last night only to reign it back in control, because he couldn't afford to crumble when she needed him.
But she was standing quietly before him now, the traces of what she'd endured marring her skin, and for a second all he could hear was her blood-curdling scream, filled with raw pain, as he was running towards the cave that day, the sound of her agony slicing through him, freezing the blood in his veins, making the world tip over and bleed red.
Kushina hadn't budged, her eyes studying his face wordlessly and he felt himself compelled to move, taking a few slow steps forward. He stopped before her, a twitch running through his hands as he brought them up ever-so-slowly, her skin feeling icy against his.
She didn't move an inch as he ran his fingers over her shoulders, tracing the ghost of a touch across the curves of her neck, gently pushing the fire of her tresses back to reveal the extent of the harm.
The bruises spread over her fair skin, blue deepening to purple before fading out to yellow at the edges, winding over her throat and around her neck, the shapes of the discoloration almost outlining the cruel fingers that had tried to take her life.
His eyes squeezed shut, teeth clenching so hard that his jaw hurt, the fury of what they'd done to her reigniting in his chest like a wildfire, void of reason. It felt like a living, clawing thing inside, turning his insides cold along with the rage, bleeding through with guilt.
Because he hadn't spared her this pain.
He had sworn to protect her, to never let her be taken by enemies again, he had sworn when they had been twelve.
And he had failed.
No matter how hard he trained, how much better he got and how hard he tried, people he loved kept getting hurt. And promises he made… kept being broken still.
And all he could do was lean forward, his forehead meeting hers as his hands still held gingerly onto the bend of her neck, rooting him in place as the cold feeling of helplessness spilled down his frame.
The whisper of her touch at his face almost startled him, her fingers brushing lightly over his cheek.
"Don't do this to yourself, ya know."
Because she knew, of course she knew what he was thinking. She knew him much too well.
He shook his head ever-so-slightly, his forehead still pressed against hers, as the words crawled up his throat despite himself.
"If I had been faster, if I had found you sooner… If I had gotten you out of that forest clearing- I should have come with you when you left the meeting, Gods, I didn't need to stay-"
Her hand moved to his mouth, pressing fingers at his lips, silencing his ramble.
"Don't. You'll drive yourself mad with this kind of thinking, ya know." she whispered again and the ruined rasp of her voice was like a blade in his side.
He shook his head again, exhaling a pent-up breath against her fingertips, and she lowered her hand gingerly. Her fingers found his cheek again, brushing the stray bangs back from his face as she pulled away, forcing him to meet her eyes.
Her eyebrows had furrowed with the trace of the stubbornness he loved her for.
"This is not on you, do you hear me? Don't even dare think that way. What happened, happened. It's over now. I'm here and I'm well, I'm not hurt-"
A sound of desperation bubbled up his throat.
"Don't- Don't try to play it down. I was there Kushina. When I heard you scream like that, I- I couldn't-"
She pursed her lips in defiance as she grabbed at his hand, bringing it to rest over the bruised skin of her neck, pressing down over his fingers.
"This? This is nothing. A bruise. It will fade in a week. I'm not a doll, Minato, I won't break. I won't, ya know." she rasped out fiercely, almost as if trying to convince herself of the truth of those words. "And you wanna know something else? It will happen again."
He could feel his eyebrows knot as he shook his head.
"I won't let it."
But even as the words left his mouth his lips twisted in a grimace with yet another promise souring on his tongue.
Another vow to break.
Kushina seemed to have read his thoughts.
"How? By becoming Hokage as you always dreamed, and forbidding me from fighting like they've been trying to do all those years?" she bit out harshly, and he couldn't help flinching at her words.
He'd be a liar if he didn't acknowledge to himself that he had thought about it, had considered asking her to stay back in future skirmishes, his fear of losing her near-blinding him.
"We are shinobi. We fight for what is right; for what we believe in. You don't know what the future holds, but you have to know that I will get hurt again; and I need you to know that it will not break me."
He exhaled a pent-up breath, running a hand through his hair in exasperation.
"I know." he allowed, feeling his composure waver. "I've known it for years. I told you back then, didn't I, on top of that tree? That you're strong of body and spirit, I've known it ever since I met you. But I- I swore to myself then that I'd become stronger, I swore that I'd never let that happen again; that you won't need the strength to face this pain. And yet I wasn't- fast enough, I wasn't-"
Her nostrils flared, her temper rising with his words.
"But you were, damn it! You said it yourself. You were there. You were there, ya know, you came. Even when I stupidly called you in the middle of an active seal, leaving you defenceless on a battlefield, you came." she had pulled away from him now, taking a few strides in her room before turning back to face him, her eyes boring into his "Even when you were out of chakra and across the damn clearing, even then you came to my side, you bloody fool, I ought to hit you for that, ya know, do you have any idea what I went through, thinking you were dead?! Even when you died, you somehow didn't, and you still came for me. Even-"
Her next words died out before being formed, and he could see her throat work as she swallowed hard, biting at her lip to stop it from quivering.
"Even when I was alone, you were there. When that tunnel was collapsing and I didn't know if I wanted to get up, you were there, in my head, pushing me forward. You were there."
The ensuing silence was palpably incredulous, Minato looking at her through wide eyes, breath caught in his throat.
"Kushina- You…"
"Damn the bruises, and damn the scrapes; being helpless, being unable to fight, was… bad. But worse yet was that I wasn't sure I wanted to. Because I lost you." her voice broke as she blinked furiously at the tears in her eyes and he could feel the wedge of ice in his chest twist painfully with each following word. "I almost gave up, Minato. I- I never… I…"
She stumbled back, her legs giving way at the shattering confession, and she sat on her bed slowly, almost sagging down. And the sight of her sitting there, breath rasping in a hitch, furiously fighting tears because she refused to let it crumble her, it all cut through him like a knife.
Within the blink of an eye he had stepped forward, kneeling wordlessly in front of her. His hands found hers in her lap, enfolding them in his own, as he held her gaze.
"You're right, I don't know what the future holds; I don't know what will happen, but I know this: I will find you. No matter what, no matter where, I will always come. I swear it. If-" he started, swallowing hard against the lump in his throat, as he brought a hand up to her face, wiping gently at the wetness on her cheek, "If this happens again- I need you to fight. Until the very end, you fight. Because I will find you. I will always find you, do you hear me?"
She brought a hand up, over his own, pressing his fingers at her face as her eyes flitted closed for a brief second. And then she nodded, exhaling a deep breath.
"I know you will."
Her hands found the front of his sweater, clutching at the fabric as she swayed forward and off the bed, and he took a deep ragged breath as he pulled her into him, pressing her closer and burying his face in the soft flame of her hair, breathing in her scent.
She was heat, and volatility, and passion, and she was there, furiously alive in his arms, and he anchored himself in the warmth of her presence, holding her tight as she finally allowed herself a minute to crumble down.
AN: Well hello again, you lovely people! As you can see, I promised some "therapy time" and it has come. Yes, I do love my politics, but we'll get back to them in the next one, I figured some hurt and comfort time is due after all the stress. And yes, it was cheesy, I know, I tried to tone it down some, but come on, sometimes we just need some good cheese in our lives.
A few notes on the text:
1. I know Kage don't usually leave the village, I'm not being purposefully unfaithful to the source, but I figured the situation had turned dire enough that they would this time.
2. The title "sensei" for Tanaka is not because she is a teacher – it's because she is a doctor. Doctors in Japan are awarded the same title of respect, because sensei actually means a bit more than "teacher", it means "one who comes before" and is used respectfully towards professionals with great experience in certain occupations (funnily enough, nurses are not addressed with "sensei", which is why Nakoe Aro is simply Aro-san)
3. So in case this came out of the blue – I know she's a shinobi trained in combat and endurance, but she's also 18, she hasn't been (successfully) captured or tortured by enemies before. And most importantly, I've based her way of seeing the world on Naruto – she never gives up. And this time she almost did; the events compiled in such a way, coupled with the drugs, that it damaged her psychologically and emotionally above all else, and she almost lost her grip on what she believes in. And that is what caused her to lose it on her bathroom floor. Admitting it out loud later takes a toll on her, because, well… I'm sure even the strongest of people sometimes just need a minute to catch their breath. :)
4. Yes, Minato's promise at the end is quite loaded here and based on the beautiful ending to their story – because it's the promise he keeps. Because it does happen again, on the night of Naruto's birth, and this is the promise he keeps – he finds her even then and comes for her. And I think that's kind of heart-breaking and beautiful at the same time (yes, I'm a sucker for tragedy, sue me :D )
With that out of the way, I have a question for you guys. I have another Minato/Kushina story, a time-travel AU (which is in dire need of revision) that I started years ago before I went on HIATUS – I love it to bits and the ideas still live in me, more vivid than ever; I fully intended to return to it after I finish this one, because I wanted to focus on my first story and finally put a wrap on a completed work. But honestly, I've been thinking about my second idea bit more and more lately. So, what do you guys think – should I divulge my attention at the risk of updating irregularly (split between two stories that is), or should I focus on this one to conclude it faster? Any opinions on the matter?
Also, alright, I've been getting this A LOT – how many really want to see lemons and such? Because I'm getting the feeling it's becoming a popular demand :D Maybe I could try including such scenes in my second story? I've never tried writing them, I've always felt I'd be rubbish at conveying the beauty of the moment without turning it vulgar, but who knows…
In any case, thank you once again for sticking with me so many words in! Thank you for taking the time to reach out and comment, it's so lovely to hear your thoughts, but hey, thank you for reading to all the silent lurkers too, because I've been there and I know that I love stories no less for not dropping a line! I see you guys and I love you too!
See you soon with the next one! Ja ne~