Chapter 22: The Struggle for Truth

Itachi insisted I spend a day resting even though I felt fine after a good night's sleep. It was not too bad, actually. He was more openly concerned and caring towards me because we were away from the Akatsuki. We spent time talking and reading and writing together.

We arrived at the base the following evening. The other members appeared to be waiting for us and instantly crowded us. "You're back!" Kisame said. "How did it go?"

"We accomplished our mission," Itachi said, forcing a path through the group.

"Why did it take so long, hmm?" Deidara asked. "I thought it was an easy mission."

"It was, but there were... complications."

"Katsumi is hurt!" Tobi said, pointing to a piece of bandage that stuck out from under my shirt.

"Nice going, Itachi," Hidan said. "How did you let that happen?"

"You were supposed to protect her," Deidara snapped before looking at me with worried. "Are you alright?"

"Hey, he did his best," Kiku said.

"I - I'm fine," I said. The sudden attention, especially after a long mission, made me uncomfortable. Deidara's eyes flashed with realization.

"Hey, everyone, back off," he said. "Give her some space."

"That means you too, Blondie," Hidan said before leaving with the others.

"No, that's alright," I said, grabbing Deidara's arm to stop him from leaving.

Itachi glanced at us. "I'll report in," he said. "You can stay here."

"Thanks."

"What happened?" Deidara asked once we were alone (aside from Kiku).

"I got in the way of someone trying to attack Itachi."

Deidara frowned. "He couldn't handle it on his own?"

"Well, maybe, but that's not the point. We were on a mission together, and I had to protect him, you know?"

Deidara averted his gaze. "I see."

I frowned, wondering at his reaction. "Hey, he saved me too. I was poisoned, and he traveled up a mountain to get me the antidote."

Deidara looked at me with conflicting emotions. "That's good. I'm glad you're alright."

"And it helped us bond. That's the point of all this, isn't it?" I held up my wrist with the bracelet. "We'll be able to break the curse."

"Then you'll be free." Deidara grimaced. "I just wish he wasn't necessary."

Before I could require as to what he meant, Itachi returned and said, "We are finished. We can rest now."

I smiled at him. "Alright. I'll see you later, Deidara."

"Right," Deidara muttered.

I was too tired to look too deeply into his behavior and was happy to return to my own bed. I slept soundly that night, next to Itachi once again. In the morning, he did not allow me to train. Apparently I needed one more day of rest, but I thought he was being overprotective. The proof of him caring for me was enough for me to let it slide this time.

We spent a good part of the day together, not saying much or doing anything in particular but enjoying the other's presence. He was back to concealing his emotions even from me, but it felt different now that I knew they were there. And maybe it was my imagination, but I thought I felt something from the bracelet every now and then.

That evening, I was about to follow Itachi back to our room when Kiku nudged me in the opposite direction. "You've got a problem to take care of," she said.

I blinked. "What are you talking about?" I followed her gaze to the living room, where Deidara sat on the couch, watching me with an unhappy expression. He looked away when he noticed me watching him.

"I think he has a problem with you spending so much time with Itachi."

I frowned. "That sounds like his problem to me. He needs to get over it and stop being petty."

"But what if it's not simple jealousy? What if there's something more going on... like with Naruto and Sasuke?"

This got me thinking. It did seem like Deidara was not too fond of Itachi, but as he did not seem to care for anyone at all, I had not thought much of it. "Maybe..."

"And even if he is just afraid Itachi will take you away from him, aren't his feelings valid? He needs reassurance."

I sighed and shook my head. "But I'm no good with feelings."

Kiku smiled. "That's why you need practice. Don't worry; if you're sincere, I'm sure you'll get through to him." She did a full circle around my legs, rubbing against me.

"Fine. I'll see what I can do." I took a deep breath and approached him. "Hello, Deidara."

"Hello, Katsumi," he said without emotion, his eyes on the book he held to his face... upside down. "Shouldn't you be with Itachi?"

"No, I'm talking to you right now. Why do you have a problem with me hanging out with Itachi?"

"Of course not. You can do whatever you want. I don't care."

The derision in his voice irked me. I was not going to accept this attitude from him. "Alright, come with me." I grabbed his arm and yanked him off the couch. He dropped his book in his surprise.

"Hey, what do you think you're doing?"

"Bringing you somewhere we can talk in private." Despite his grumbling, he allowed me to drag him to his room. I let him go and motioned to his bed. "Sit down."

Deidara crossed his arms. "This is my room. You can't tell me what to do, hmm."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine. Stand." I then noticed that someone was missing from the room. "Great. My emotional support cat abandoned me." I sighed. Oh well. Looks like I had to figure this out on my own. "Okay, what's your problem with Itachi?"

"I do not have a problem with Itachi."

I lifted my eyebrows. "Really?"

"Maybe I have a problem with how high and mighty he acts because he posses the Sharingan."

I blinked. His problem was with the Sharingan? "I don't think that's true, but maybe you see something that I don't. Tell me about it."

Deidara hesitated. Finally, he relaxed enough to sit beside me on the bed. "I told you I was forced to join the Akatsuki, right?"

"Yes..."

"Itachi is the one at fault. If he beat me, I had to join." His hands clenched into fists. "I did not even have a chance to show off my art before he caught me in a genjutsu. It was all over."

I instantly felt compassion for him. "Deidara, that's terrible." I placed a hand on his arm. He tried to jerk away, but I kept my hand there.

"That's not even the worst part. I know he was just following orders, but it's the way he did it. He had absolutely no respect for me or my art. He still doesn't. Nothing I do is good enough, no matter how hard I try."

I could understand his frustration and found something familiar in it. It seemed to me he wanted Itachi's recognition like Naruto wanted Sasuke's. "If it helps, I don't think it's personal. He doesn't care much for anyone or anything."

Anger gave way to sadness. "He cares about you." I remained silent, acknowledging the statement. "And you care about him."

I slowly took his hand in mine, entwining our fingers when he did not pull away. "I care about you too, Dei. My relationship with Itachi can't take away from that." I rested my head on his shoulder and felt him relax against me. I smiled despite the situation.

"Who do you care about more?"

"I can't compare you like that. The way I feel about you two is completely different."

"Different how?"

"I don't know. I'm no good at figuring out feelings."

"Would drawing help?" He had calmed down now, and there was gentleness in his voice.

"Maybe." I lifted my head to look at him. "Do you mind if I draw here?"

Deidara smiled at me. "Not if you mind if I work on my sculptures at the same time."

I smiled back at him. "Alright, I'll go get my stuff." I hopped off the bed and headed to my room. The sight of Itachi writing at his desk gave me pause. Even though we were on good terms now, after what I learned, I could not just say nothing. "Hey, Itachi."

He glanced at me. "What is it?"

"Deidara told me you forced him to join the Akatsuki."

"Oh, so that's what's going on," Kiku said from my futon.

"Yes," Itachi said without emotion. "What of it?"

I grit my teeth, annoyed with his response. "How could you do that? Taking away someone's freedom like that is - is wrong!"

"It was not my decision. I was completing the mission. Besides, it is not like he would have turned out any better if he had not joined."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You don't know that. You don't know him. And, okay, you didn't have a choice, but why don't you do anything to help him now? You said so yourself, he's still young and full of energy and hope. The Akatsuki will take that away from him."

"He is not my concern. And neither is he yours."

"I have made him my concern. And if you won't do anything for him, then I will." I swiped my bag from the floor and swung it over my shoulder.

"You're not doing him any favors."

Itachi's voice stopped me at the door. "Says you."

"He's into you now, but he'll get over you once you leave. You are of no concern to him other than the enjoyment he can get out of the moment."

I swallowed hard as my own fears were echoed. "That- that doesn't mean I can't help him. Right is right. It doesn't matter what I get in return." Then I left the room, feeling shaken. I stopped at Deidara's room and knocked.

"Come in!" Deidara said from the other side. I entered the room and was greeted by the sight of him sitting in a chair, concentrating hard on some sort of clay figure. He paused his work to give me a warm smile. "Hey, Katsumi. Is everything alright?"

Seeing him like this, my worries could not help but melt away. "It is now."

Itachi and I walked together in the pleasant April air. We had not said much to each other since our confrontation the previous day, but he insisted we take a walk together. My anger had since evaporated, so I agreed. Letting my emotions take control of me was no way to proceed in this situation. I needed to find a way to get him to see the truth.

"I am sorry if I seem harsh to you," he said as we walked amongst the trees, surprising me. "I cannot afford to care."

I took a deep breath to calm myself before engaging him. "I get that, really. I used to think the same way. And blocking everyone and everything out is easier. It's not healthy, though. Isn't that way you tried to help me with my memories?"

Itachi lifted his head to gaze at the sky. "You had an irrational fear and needed to face reality. This is different. Caring about others is a weakness that must be minimized. The sooner Deidara realizes this, the more likely he will survive. What I am doing is making him stronger."

I scoffed. "No, that will destroy him. What is the point in merely surviving, especially to someone like him? He'll spiral too quickly. He needs something else to hold onto. Having you as an adversary is not enough for him, though maybe it is for Sasuke..." I shook my head. "But even in his case, it's still wrong. A life of hate is hardly a life at all."

"You will understand someday."

I grit my teeth. "Don't speak to me as if I'm a child. You're the one who needs to understand." Why was he still so difficult? It felt like I had taken one step forward and two steps back with him. I needed a new plan, and I needed to implement it in small doses. I could only take so much of this at once.

A couple of days later, Itachi left me alone for a short day mission with Kisame. He returned to the room that evening dropping wet. "It's raining out?" I said.

"Storming," he said.

This piqued my interest. "Is there lightning?"

Itachi looked at me as if trying to figure me out. "Yes."

I grinned. "Okay, thanks. I'll be back later." I remembered how Kakashi had taught me how to use lightning jutsu in a storm, and I wanted to try it again. However, I could not go outside alone. I banged on Deidara's door, and he answered right away.

"Where's the fire?" he said, seeming surprised to find that it was me.

"Come play in the storm with me!"

Deidara gave me a bewildered look. "Why would I do that?"

"It will be fun. Come on, I want to show you something."

Deidara followed behind as I ran down the hall. I had to stop to allow him to open the entrance to the hideout. He did not look pleased when he saw the weather. "What exactly are you thinking?"

"What have you never played in rain before?"

"Hmm... no."

We climbed to the grassy area on top of the base. I looked around in satisfaction before turning to face Deidara. "This will do. Look." I held out my hands and formed electricity between my fingers. "The lightning from the storm helps power my jutsu."

Deidara nodded in approval. "Okay, that is pretty cool, hmm."

I smiled. "Now watch this." I turned around and quickly located a target. I ran straight for it, building up electricity in the palm of my hand. I shot my chidori at a large tree branch, causing it to burst in an explosion of twigs and leaves. I looked back at Deidara eagerly to find he had followed me.

"Beautiful," he said with a grin. "That is art."

I brightened at his praise. "Thank you. I-" Despite being able to run with no problem, I took one step forward and slipped in the wet grass. I instinctively grabbed onto Deidara, pulling him down with me.

"Hey!" We landed on our sides next to each other. When he lifted his head, I could not help but laugh at the mud that dripped from his hair. "This isn't funny!"

I smirked. "I think it is." I started to stand up, but he suddenly tackled me and rolled with me, causing us both to be covered in mud.

"What do you think now, hmm?" he asked once he let me go.

I laughed at him. "I think you're ridiculous." I scooped mud in my hand and flung it at him. Needless to say, our battle escalated to an all out war that had us returning to the base drenched and dirty but supremely satisfied.

It happened three days later. I was sitting on the couch reading my book when Tobi popped up in front of me. "What is Katsumi reading?" he asked.

"Nothing you would be interested in," I replied.

Tobi snatched the book from my hands and held it close to his face. "Let's see..." He let out an exaggerated gasp. "Katsumi is a bad girl."

I glared at him. "Give that back." I snatched the book and carefully placed it in my bag. "Did you want something, Tobi?"

The boy brightened. "Yes! Tobi noticed that Katsumi is closer to Itachi senpai since they went on a mission and Deidara senpai since they went flying together. Tobi wants to be close too!"

I blinked. "Oh, what do you want to do?" Had I been neglecting him? It was not a conscious effort on my part.

"Let's go on an adventure outside!"

I shrugged. "Alright." I could use some fresh air. Once we were outside, Tobi climbed the nearest tree.

"Time to race!"

"Hey, wait!" But he had already taken off running from tree to tree. Sighing, I climbed the tree to follow him. "Where exactly are we going?" But he was too far ahead to hear me. "Slow down!" Now I could not even see him. Where did he go so quickly? I was so preoccupied with finding him that I did not pay close enough attention to my footing. I tried to reach out to grab something as I fell, but someone's arms caught me and brought me to the ground.

"You should be more careful," said a deep voice.

I turned around and gasped at seeing my rescuer. "Tobi?!" I backed away instinctively.

"Why are you so surprised? You already knew my secret."

I bit my lip and glanced at the ground. "I don't know what you're talking about." This wasn't happening. There was no way he could know that I knew.

"Itachi told you, didn't he? That we hail from the same clan."

Ah, so that was what he thought. It was better that way. Itachi could handle himself. "He may have mentioned it." Which was not a lie.

Tobi took a step closer to me. "It's alright, Katsumi. I'll tell you who I am You must be curious. I trust you know not to tell anyone, although it's not like they would believe you."

My heart pounded in my chest. What was going on? Was he serious or messing with me? It was really hard to get a read on him when he kept his face covered. I should have brought Kiku with me. "You'll show me your face?"

"No," he said harshly, causing me to flinch. "You are afraid of me. Good. All you will get is a name."

I swallowed hard. "What good is that to me? The only other Uchiha I even know of is-" I paused and shook my head. "It doesn't matter."

"Itachi will tell you everything you need to know."

Now I was really confused about his motives, but I was not going to pass up free information. "Alright. What is it?"

"Madara."

I took a deep breath and allowed the name to wash over me. I felt him staring at me, though I avoided looking directly at him. He could still use the Sharingan with that mask on, and I did not need to deal with that. "Hello, Madara." A moment of silence passed between us.

"Feel free to forget this ever happened. Speak to me as Tobi if you want nothing to do with me."

The smart, Itachi-approved choice would be to agree and accept the gift offered to me, but for some reason, I could not do it. "But I want to know you. All of you. We're friends, aren't we?"

"You realize Tobi is a facade, right?"

"Maybe, but that doesn't mean everything we've been through was fake. We still spent time together and bonded regardless of whether you were acting. There's still something there. Something worth preserving."

He allowed another long silence to go on before speaking. "You find out I've been deceiving you, and you're concerned about preserving our friendship? You are a strange one."

My heart sank. "Yeah, I guess so."

"We'll do as you wish, but only speak to me as Madara when I initiate it." He marched right passed me in my surprise. "Let us return."

"R-Right." I scrambled to keep up with him, my mind whirling with confusion.

"What's wrong?" Itachi asked as soon as I entered our room after parting from Tobi.

My heart hammered in my chest. How did he know? Oh, the bracelet. "It wasn't my fault!" I said quickly. "I wasn't inquiring or anything. Tobi is the one who wanted me to know."

Itachi's eyes narrowed. "What did he do?" Kiku hopped to the floor and approached me with a curious look.

"He- he told me his name."

"And what is his name?" Kiku asked.

"Madara."

Kiku swished her tail. "Means nothing to me."

"He said you knew," I said to Itachi.

"Yes," said Itachi. "He is an old and powerful Uchiha you should stay away from."

"If he's so powerful, why's he messing around in the Akatsuki - and not even as a member?"

Itachi's gaze hardened. "No asking questions. They will only get you into trouble."

I sucked in a sharp breath. "Fine."

"If he bothers you, let me know."

"I thought you couldn't protect me from him."

"I can't if you choose to do something stupid, but if he messes with you out of his own accord, I will make him stop." He paused. "He will not hurt you if you don't push too far. He is the one who wanted to bring you here to close the portal."

My eyes widened. "Really? So, he's the one who had you spy on me? What's he after?"

"He gave me the same reasons Pain gave you. If he has ulterior motives, I do not know of them. However, he did give me full control over this mission, so you have nothing to worry about."

I gave him a small smile. "Thanks."

"So, did you see under the mask?" Kiku asked.

"No."

"Even I have not seen his face," said Itachi.

Kiku gave me a hopeful look, and I shook my head. It was too dangerous. I could not go there.