This chapter takes place during the summer between Season 7 and 8. Since there is no episode I could base this chapter on, I chose to use another quote from a very iconic TV character. I'm sure, Sheldon would appreciate it – the character, not the quote.

I know some of you are waiting to hear how Leonard's and Penny's stories will continue. This one and the next chapter will focus almost exclusively on Sheldon and Amy but of course Leonard and Penny will still be a big part of this story even if for now they will be living their own lives very far apart from each other.

Beginning with this chapter this story will slowly turn into an M-rated one. You've been warned!

More Than Anything

Chapter 17 – „Change is the essential process of all existence."

Amy

She was skimming through her book. Not the one she had bought forty-five days ago at their first stop. That one was probably still at the public bookcase in Portland where she had left it and picked another one after visiting an art exhibition.

Or maybe someone else had picked it since then just like she had picked a book every few days when she was strolling through various cities.

She glanced at her boyfriend sitting across from her. He was scribbling something into one of his journals. Probably another set of arguments to present to President Siebert.

He had been working on that ever since they had started their trip. Sometimes he would present them to her and she would give him her insights and that would inspire him to change or add some things until he was pleased with the outcome.

Sheldon looked so much more relaxed than he did on that fateful day at the train station. And while she couldn't take all the credit, she was certain, she played a part in it.

Every few days they would make a longer stop along the way instead of hopping on the next train right away. But for the first few weeks, Sheldon had been stubborn. He insisted on only leaving the train station for the occasional visit to a mall or for using a laundromat somewhere.

She had been hesitant to leave him behind at first but he had encouraged her to go see the things she wanted to see, while he stayed at the train station to watch the passing trains or to explore it and work on his ketchup-statistics.

And after the first time she did this, she realized, it was exactly what she had needed. These past few months had been hard on her too. She had focused so much on being there for Sheldon. Making things easier for him. Trying to give him stability while everything else was falling apart.

Now that he was feeling a bit better, she found it much easier to focus on herself again and she had to admit, she thoroughly enjoyed it, spending a few hours reading, relaxing and visiting sights before boarding the train again.

Sheldon had made a game out of it. While she was going sightseeing or just sitting somewhere in a park reading, he sometimes skimmed through brochures meant for tourists and when she came back, he tried to guess the things she had seen. And he was surprisingly accurate about it too.

Of course that was not all he did. Just like her, he also needed this time to himself. To do what he had originally wanted, before he had invited her to join him. Clear his head and figure out how to deal with everything that was happening.

Even though his mood had gotten a lot better over time, there were still days when she could see the pure heartbreak over what was happening at home.

Especially on the day Leonard had called them to let them know he was now leaving and that he had put his key to the apartment into the mailbox.

This was really happening then. She had hoped until the last moment, that he would reconsider.

That night, she had heard Sheldon talk in his sleep, above her in the small bunk bed of their sleeper car. "No. Please don't leave me.", he repeated over and over again and "I thought you'd always be there".

Amy wasn't sure if Sheldon was only talking to Leonard. She knew it was not the first time he felt someone close to him had left him behind.

Every three or four days Penny called to check in on them. Amy loved talking to her friend and told her about the places she had visited while Penny delighted her with stories from the movie set she was working at.

"Amy? Could you ask Sheldon to talk to me for a minute?", Penny would ask every time she called. And every time, Amy nudged Sheldon and offered the phone to him but he just shook his head stubbornly.

She could hear the hurt in Penny's voice, and once, while she was sitting in a park, she called her friend back and reassured her that Sheldon would stop freezing her out at some point.

"Just keep calling.", she insisted. "Don't give up on him. He needs you as his friend. He just needs some time right now to get used to this new reality."

Then she had hung up and sighed, hoping she was right.

She used to be jealous sometimes of that special bond Sheldon seemed to share with Penny. But as much as she enjoyed being the person Sheldon was turning too, she knew how important it was, this unlikely friendship, and how much it would hurt Sheldon in the long run, losing this unique dimension that Penny brought to his life.

At some point, they arrived in New York and Amy decided, she did not want to see the city alone this time. It had taken some convincing, but after a while, Sheldon had rolled his eyes and given in, although not before he complained about how much he would hate it.

All those people. The lights. The noise.

But of course, she had done her research.

First thing in the morning, she had taken him to 'The Complete Strategist'. He had browsed the shop and found some rare expansions to one of his card games. And then he had spent almost an hour debating superheroes with other enthusiasts.

Their next stop had been the Nintendo Center, where they tried out demos of upcoming games. An activity that was more fun to her than she had expected.

In the evening, she had taken him to a cocktail bar.

"A cocktail bar? Really, Amy?", he had sighed, but after she told him to trust her, he had been thrilled to sip on a „Doctor Who"-themed cocktail at a bar that stood at the exact same position where the Tardis landed in Brooklyn once. That is, of course, if you believed the bartender.

It had gotten very late then and to her surprise it had been Sheldon who suggested not to board a night train but to stay at a small hotel.

It was the first night in weeks for them to get to share a bed instead of sleeping separately in bunk beds.

She congratulated herself for agreeing to the idea Sheldon had had on their first visit to a mall.

"Amy, let's not buy sleepwear. It will only take up space. I am buying a few shirts and we can each just take one of them to sleep in."

She had been hesitant at first. Sleeping in just a shirt? Like a savage?

But there in that hotel in New York City, cuddled up in Sheldon's arms, their bare legs intertwined and his eyes roaming over the Flash Logo on her chest… well, all she could say was, she did not have a problem with that.

That night had been so cozy. After weeks when she could just stare at the bed above hers and long for the man sleeping in it, finally she had gotten to feel his warmth again.

They had not done much that night except kissing softly and being wrapped around each other. But even when he did not say anything, she knew he had missed this just as much as she had.

In the morning, while she was already on the phone, looking up what train to hop on next, he had played with the hem of her shirt and before she could get up, he had pulled her close and taken the phone from her hand.

"Amy let's stay here one more day. You've planned such a wonderful day yesterday, doing everything I liked. It's your turn now. Let's put together a day that is just for you."

She had looked at him in shock. Never had she expected Sheldon to suggest such a thing, but he had been determined.

They had visited the Morgan Library and Museum first and then they had booked a Sightseeing Tour for the afternoon. After that, Sheldon hadn't even complained when she had wanted to spend the evening seeing Les Miserables on Broadway.

There were a thousand more things that she had wanted to see, but of course they had not been enough time.

"I feel the same way.", Sheldon had told her before they went back to their hotel – yes, of course they had booked another night there. "We've passed so many things that would have interested me. We'll just come back here one day."

And while the first night in that hotel had mostly been cozy and comfortable, Amy still felt dizzy from the kisses they shared on the second night.

Sheldon had pulled her on top of him and his hands had been everywhere. On her legs, her backside, roaming her sides. It was heaven, finally getting to continue where they had left things off a few months before.

Back on the train something between them had changed. His voice was softer when talking to her. He seemed to gaze into her eyes a little longer when they talked about random things. And when they said good-night, it seemed he was a little sad, every time she got into her bottom bunk bed.

They travelled back to the west coast then, passing through many states. She still went on her little sightseeing tours and occasionally Sheldon went with her.

She enjoyed every minute of it, although they did not check into any more hotels.

Finally, when she mentioned they would be passing Texas soon, he just hummed at first. And then she noticed the wheels in his brain starting to turn a little faster before he finally asked her if she would mind making a stop and visiting his mother.

She had a hard time not to squeal at that. Sheldon was taking her to his home to meet his family. She had hoped for this to happen for a long time.

Of course, Sheldon had announced their visit beforehand. "I do not wish to witness my mother having naked coitus once more.", he had grumbled before he made the call.

But upon arrival, things had been a little tense at first. Even though Amy had figured out that Mary opposing their relationship had been a ploy to get them back together all those years ago, she was not entirely sure if Sheldon's mother really approved of her.

She had done her best to be charming and polite. She had even participated in praying before dinner. Everything had been going well.

That is before Mary had tried to send her to Missy's old room for the night and Sheldon had gone ballistic.

Amy had softly squeezed his hand under the table, trying to get him to let this go. Yes, she missed it too, sleeping in his arms. But she did not want to start a fight with his mother over it.

Sheldon had been unstoppable though, telling his mother that with her own behavior she had absolutely no right to keep him from sleeping in the same room as his long-term girlfriend and that he'd rather leave her house right now than keep abiding to her stupid and unnecessary rules, when she knew perfectly well that he had a lot more self-restraint than she had herself.

Of course, she had sent him to his room to cool off then. To 'talk to his lady-friend woman to woman'.

Oh, she had wished for a hole to appear in the ground and swallow her whole when her hopefully someday mother-in-law had narrowed her eyes at her and implored about the state of their relationship.

"Yes, we've been sharing a bed quite frequently at home.", she had admitted. "But nothing has happened… yet. It's just… it's so nice, sleeping next to each other", she had added quickly.

There was just something about the way Mary looked at her that made her want to be honest with her.

Mary had nodded then. "Well, you surely are a very patient young lady. And I appreciate your honesty."

They both had resumed drinking their tea. Mary had changed the subject then and asked about the trip. Amy had been confused at first, because Sheldon had already told her everything over dinner.

"No.", Mary had clarified. "What I am asking is, how come you two have been traveling the country for the past six weeks? This was not a planned trip or my son would have told me on our weekly phone calls. Something's happening and I'd like to know what it is."

Amy had explained then. Not everything because she did not know how much Sheldon wanted his mother to know. But enough to get a picture of what had been going on.

Mary had nodded in understanding then. "I see."

Then she had sighed deeply.

"Amy, you seem to have become very important to my son. I've never seen him like this. To be honest, I never expected him to feel this strongly for someone."

She smiled. "Well, he's very important to me too. And for what it's worth, I also never expected to meet someone I would feel this strongly for."

Mary kept studying her face, but finally she smiled back.

„Well, in that case, I guess it is a good thing you two have found each other. You have certainly helped him through a very difficult situation. And I am very happy for both of you."

„Thank you, Mary. Your approval means a lot to me.", she answered sincerely.

„Good.", Mary nodded. „Now let's talk about the sleeping arrangements for the next few days."

Amy cringed.

„Mary, I understand you being uncomfortable with us sharing a room. And I don't want to break your rules. I can talk to Sheldon if you want me too."

Mary smirked.

„While I admire your respectful behavior, I don't think that would be a good idea. Raising Sheldon wasn't easy, but he was always a stickler for rules. The fact that he is so adamant on not following them this time tells me it wouldn't be wise of me to insist on it."

Amy gasped.

„Mary, are you saying…"

But Mary interrupted her and called out Sheldon's name to get him back into the living room, not wanting to say the same things twice.

„You two can share a room for now. But as you might remember, Sheldon, the walls here are paper thin. Now, it may have been a while but I was young and in love once and I am not naïve. What you two are doing in California is your business, I will never interfere there. However, I will not be disrespected in my own home. I trust you. Both of you. Do not break my trust, or I guarantee you, the rest of your visit will be rather unpleasant. Are we clear?"

Amy coughed. "Crystal clear.", she croaked while Sheldon just nodded, still looking slightly annoyed.

Three nights and three days had they spent in Texas.

On their second day, Sheldon's siblings had arrived, curious to meet "his woman". His family was loud and emotional and kind of pushy. Always teasing each other, sticking their nose into each other's business.

Completely different from her own family.

And she loved every second of it, soaking up the kind of family life, she had secretly always dreamed of as an only child.

She couldn't get over how adorable Sheldon's little nephew was. And she was baffled when Missy called her "Auntie Amy" and offered her to hold him for a while.

Another thing she loved very much was waking up in Sheldon's old room. Not just because the bed was so small, they were completely wrapped around each other to fit into it.

But also because, in the early morning, while Sheldon was still asleep and the first sunlight brightened the room, she let her eyes wander, looking at the reminders of Sheldon's childhood in this wonderful home, imagining what it would have been like, being his friend back then.

Seeing the posters, the few toys that were left in the room, the old pictures, the action figures, it felt like uncovering another piece of the puzzle that made Sheldon's personality.

They had taken walks through his hometown, sometimes just the two of them and sometimes accompanied by Mary who would tell her stories of Sheldon growing up.

And of course they had visited Sheldon's meemaw who had insisted on stuffing them with brisket and cookies and endeared her with even more beautiful anecdotes of Sheldon's life in Texas.

On their last evening, the old lady had taught her how to play poker and then she had told her a lot of dirty jokes.

It had not been easy, saying goodbye to all of them.

And now that they were less than a day away from California, she couldn't help but feel a little sad.

For the second time since they had started dating, she had gotten to experience a very special summer with Sheldon. And even if she was looking forward to moving into his building, she didn't really want this trip to end.

Sheldon

He skimmed through the comic book he had picked up in his room in Texas.

Torture. It had been torture.

He had expected Amy to bolt any second.

First, when his mother had wanted them to sleep separately. It was ridiculous, really. They were in their thirties and had been dating for four years. How dare his mother try and treat them like little kids. Especially after what happened last time he was there. She had basically given him her blessing to be intimate with Amy and now she was making a fuss just because they were sleeping in the same room?

And then, when the rest of his family had shown up, they had been so loud and chaotic. Badgering poor Amy with all sorts of questions, and telling her all kinds of embarrassing stories. His sister dumping her offspring on her.

It had been strange, seeing her with a little baby on her arm. He had not been able to categorize the feelings he had about it.

But Amy had put on a brave face and behaved just as friendly and polite as always. He admired her for it.

However, his family was not the only torturous things on this trip.

Why, oh why had he offered her one of his shirts to sleep in? He had wanted to embrace the hobo-lifestyle and it really was ridiculous to buy nightwear when they each only had bought a small backpack for their travels.

It had felt reasonable then and it had never been a bother while on the train. The torture had started in New York when they shared a bed again after weeks of sleeping in bunk beds.

As if the perfect day she had planned for him hadn't been enough, seeing her wearing his shirt in bed, unable to avoid touching her naked legs. Oh boy…

But nevertheless, booking the hotel had been a great idea. Not just because he had enjoyed finally getting to kiss and touch the woman he loved again after such a long time. But also because with her in his arms, he had slept better than he had for weeks.

Back on the train, he had really started to miss her, lying in his lonely bunk bed.

And then of course the same thing in Texas but in his tiny little bed. The only thing keeping him in control was the fact that his mother was probably up all night listening to suspicious sounds coming from his room.

And now, here they were again, in another sleeper car on their way to the next stop.

They had not discussed where to go next.

But he assumed, they would just head straight back to California.

He was torn on how to feel about that.

He dreaded the new reality he was coming home to. Seeing Leonard's empty room. Not knowing if his other friends would still hang out at his apartment.

And of course no longer having Penny as a neighbor. He knew, Amy was right. It was not very nice of him, ignoring Penny and not taking her phone calls.

But it hurt.

With Leonard, even though he hated the fact that he was living so far away now, he knew they would stay friends. They were so similar in many ways. Maybe they could still collaborate professionally. Go to comic-con together. Leonard could fly in to watch premieres of upcoming Sci-Fi movies together.

With Penny however, he knew they had only become friends because she had moved in across the hall and started dating his best friend. And even if they had become close friends in the process, what was there left that would connect them?

She would definitely not come to the comic book store with him and no way would he start going to college parties.

Wasn't it better to rip off the band-aid now? Just accept this new reality where she was no longer part of his life?

It hurt, having those thought and he did not feel ready to deal with this yet.

But there were also things he was very much looking forward to, coming home soon.

The only upside of Penny moving out was that he had finally found a way to let Amy be a bigger part of his life without having her move into his apartment.

He couldn't wait to bring her home. See her everyday. Have her sleep over in his bed again.

Maybe he could persuade her to wear one of his shirts again and then, he would not have to restrain himself any longer.

Now that he had cleared his head a bit, he couldn't wait to finally continue their own little journey. To continue to discover her in a way he had never longed to discover anyone.

Amy

The most unpleasant thing on their trip and really the only thing she would not miss apart from the bunk beds, was having to use the bathroom on the train.

It had been one of the upsides to stopping in New York and Texas. Finally getting a relaxing, uninterrupted, hot shower again.

After washing herself in the small bathroom on board of the train, Sheldon was already lying in bed, so she quickly changed into his shirt, folded her day clothes and put them into her bag.

Then she lay down herself, looking up to the bed above her.

"So, I was thinking…", she started. "We'll be passing Arizona soon. I've never been to Sedona. I heard it must be beautiful."

He hummed indifferently. "Well, I guess we'll see some nice landscapes through the window."

She sighed. It was not what she had meant.

"Well… I thought, why not make it our last stop before we get home? Maybe do some hiking…"

"Hiking?", he asked shocked. "Amy, you've known me for years. Can you really picture me hiking?"

She chuckled. Well, he had a point.

"Come on, Sheldon. I am not athletic either. But wasn't this trip supposed to be something for you to find yourself? There are whole books on how to achieve that through hiking. Think about it. You and me, some fresh air, this special place, maybe we could even make it two days and check into a nice hotel… doesn't it sound great?"

He groaned exasperatedly and she braced herself for the outburst she knew was coming.

„Sure, let's do that.", he exclaimed. „Let's go take a hike and be eaten alive by mosquitos. Oh, maybe while we're at it, let's eat while sitting in the grass and share our food with ants. And then let's use nature's restroom. Oh and then of course, let's find a cozy little hotel where you can torture me again all night with that shirt you're wearing. Let me tell you, you won't be wearing it for too long this time. A man can only take this much, Amy, so I hope you'll be ready to face the consequences. I do not wish to make another stop, Amy. All I want to do is finally take you home. Have you sleep in my bed again. Share my life with you. So please, let us go home. Let us start the rest of our lives together."

It had started out as a rant and she had rolled her eyes at his first sentences. But her eyes had widened more and more as he kept talking.

What?

Sheldon

She was suddenly so quiet.

Why? Had he said something wrong?

He replayed it in his mind.

No.

No, no, no, no, no.

He had not just told her, he would ravish her the next chance he got.

And no way had he just talked about spending the rest of their lives together.

Oh dear Lord. That was it. He had officially lost his mind.

She would surely be expecting an engagement ring next.

Maybe he really had not said it. Maybe he had imagined it.

Yes, that must be it. Otherwise, she would have answered.

Why had she not answered? Did she not want to spend the rest of her life with him?

Had he offended her with what he had said about her torturing him?

But then, he heard the rustling of sheets. Bare feet touching the floor. Hands grasping the ladder leading up to him.

Keep calm, Sheldon. And if possible, deny, deny, deny.

But there was no point in denying when her face appeared before him.

She looked at him like never before. Wide eyes. Tears gathering in them.

"Sheldon… did you mean everything you just said?", she almost whispered.

"I… I…", he stuttered.

She bit her lower lips, apparently not daring to say anything else.

It was time to confess. Now or never.

"I did.", he said softly. "I love you, Amy. And I meant every word I just said. I've been looking forward to it all summer. Having you live in the same building and seeing you all the time. And well… finally having the privacy of our apartments to continue where we have left off. We might not be living together but I do see it as our first joint home. Does this make sense?"

Her lips started to tremble and the first tear rand down her cheek. Why was she crying?

"I love you too, Sheldon. And this is the most romantic thing you ever said to me. I… you're right. Let's not make a stop. Let's go home. Together to our home."

The earth stood still for a moment as they were staring at each other.

He had no words for how he felt, when he was looking at her, standing there on the ladder wearing his Flash T-Shirt. All he knew was that the last bits of fear and inhibitions he had felt before were slowly crumbling and all he needed was her. As close as humanly possible.

It was maddening. This need for her.

My girlfriend. Mine.

"Come here.", he croaked and took her hand.

She quickly ascended the last few stairs and suddenly she was on top of him, straddling him.

She was not close enough, so he cupped her face and pulled her down to him, crashing his mouth against hers.

It was different than their kiss good-night. Hot, wet, hungry. Their tongues dancing together.

She was trembling all over, so he held her hip to steady her.

He brushed the naked skin of her legs and then he let his hands wander over the shirt she was wearing until he traced the Flash-logo with his fingers.

Then he started playing with the hem of the shirt.

His shirt. On his woman. The woman he loved. The woman he would be going home with soon. Their home.

He could not control himself any longer. And he did not even want to try.

He slipped his hands inside the shirt and brushed her soft belly. She whimpered into his mouth as he explored her.

She felt so soft and silky. So warm under his fingers. He reached up higher until he cupped her breasts.

She moved her lips away from him and inhaled sharply while staring into his eyes as he tentatively grazed her nipples with his knuckles.

After breathing out heavily, she resumed kissing him and he took it as encouragement to proceed. He grasped her breasts firmly and rolled her hardened nipples between his fingers.

She moaned softly into his mouth.

He was overcome with a need for her, so he tugged on her shirt but she did not understand his intentions, so he moved his hands to her back and swiftly turned them over.

Unintentionally he ended up between her opened legs, feeling her heat. He groaned deeply.

She stared up to him in wonder. "Sh… Sheldon…", she whispered.

„Okay?", he clarified as he tugged again on the shirt she was wearing. He could not say more. His brain was blissfully empty. He didn't want to think anymore. He just wanted to feel.

She nodded frantically and helped him remove the shirt from her body.

She bit her lip and tried to cover her breasts for a second. He did not understand why. He had seen her naked before.

He quickly removed his own shirt too, suddenly feeling much too hot. He gently touched her hands then.

"Let me see you, Amy, please. You have no reason to hide from me.", he whispered.

It seemed to be the right thing to say, because she smiled and revealed himself to him, making no more move to hide anything.

He kissed her lips again sweetly and his hands started to explore her body again, tracing a trail from her neck down to her hips before moving upwards again, enveloping her breasts.

Her hands moved to his shoulders, her soft fingers felt heavenly on his skin.

She gasped when he pinched her nipple and instead of kissing her lips again, he moved to her neck. She moaned and writhed under him as he licked and sucked the sensitive skin there.

Only when he was certain that everyone could see the mark he left on her neck tomorrow, did he move lower, trailing wet kisses down from her collarbone to her chest.

He couldn't get over how she felt. So soft. So wonderful. He showered her breasts with soft kisses, covering every inch of them and when he heard her whimper his name, he could not resist any longer.

He covered her nipple with his mouth and sucked on it lightly. She kept squirming and gasping for breath. It was exhilarating, hearing how much he could affect her.

Her fingers found their way to the back of his head and the way she was brushing through his hair gave him goosebumps.

Nothing in his life had aroused him like this. He did not even know he could feel like this. He only knew he wanted more.

His right hand moved lower, touching her over her panties. Oh dear Lord, even still partly covered, she felt hot and damp. She must be just as aroused as he was.

He needed to feel her. He could not hold back any longer. He moved back up to her and cupped her face so she had to look at him.

"Amy…", he groaned before kissing her again deeply. "Amy, please…"

With his left hand he tugged on her panties hoping she would get the hint.

"Yes, oh my god, yes.", she cried out and lifted her hips a little, so he could undress her more easily before she hooked her fingers into his underwear intending to remove it as well.

He sighed relieved. Oh, this was heaven. This was…

BAM!

The door of their sleeper car slammed shut and both of them turned their heads momentarily.

His eyes skimmed the room, then he froze.

"Our bags!", he croaked.

"We were robbed!" she shouted at the same time.

The train stopped and he knew what that meant. Whoever had been in here was already out of the door. Their things were lost for good.

His arousal was gone in a second as the reality of the situation hit him.

He moved away from her and retrieved his shirts before wordlessly handing the one she had been wearing before back to her.

It was awkward, getting redressed in the tight space of his bed while avoiding to look at each other.

He sighed and sat up, leaning against the wall and she sat down next to him.

"I guess… we should get off the train and call the police.", she finally said after an uncomfortable silence.

"Yes.", he agreed.

"What's the next stop?", she asked.

He closed his eyes and summoned up the image of the train schedule.

"Kingman.", he whispered. "Kingman, Arizona."

Next on 'More Than Anything':

Amy and Sheldon return from their trip and settle into their new lives as neighbors. How will what they experienced on the train affect their new beginnings?