Disclaimer : I do not own the characters or the story of Naruto.
A/N : Thank you to everyone who took the time to leave their thoughts after reading the last chapter. As hinted, here is the next update, and a very happy birthday to our boy Sasu-chan! I will be addressing some concerns that the readers might have regarding this story at the end of this chapter. Otherwise, I hope you like this one. Please read and review if you enjoy or have critiques. It always encourages me to write more. Thanks!
Chapter 12
Three months and a week till she says yes
Naruto joined his palms in prayer and said, "Itadakimasu", before breaking his chopsticks and diving right in to the bowl of his favorite pork ramen in front of him at Ichiraku's. Slurping up the noodles hungrily into his mouth, since he was near starving that morning, he enjoyed the familiar warm flavor that reminded him of fond memories from his childhood. He quickly finished the noodles and toppings, then picking up the bowl in both hands, proceeded to gulp down the delicious broth. Once done, he ordered another serving of the same which the old man Ichiraku gladly accepted and began preparing for him, giving him the closed eyed smile he was so familiar with, warming his heart.
While waiting for his next bowl, he tentatively glanced to his side to see his teammate he had invited still hadn't taken a bite out of her own bowl, lazily swirling her chopsticks into the broth with one hand, while resting her head on the other, seemingly deep in thought. Sakura had been sad like this for a few weeks now, and no matter how hard he had tried to cheer her up, she wouldn't go back to her usual happy mood. Which is why he had invited her here for breakfast and she had accepted as it was one of those rare occasions when she had a day off from her shifts at the hospital for the event tonight. He had hoped the ramen would lift her mood like it always did for himself but how would it work since she wasn't eating any in the first place.
"Sakura-chan, you're not having any", he said in a whiny tone which was sure to get him a reprimand if she was being her usual self. But this time all she did was give him a short hum, staring into her bowl, still stuck in her own head. Naruto wondered if a distraction would work to divert her mind from whatever she was thinking so hard about, and an idea struck him momentarily about something he wanted to ask her. It was worth a try at least, so he thought about the precise words to use, since it was a sensitive subject and blurted out his question.
"Sakura-chan, how do you figure out if you love someone?", he asked and watched her finally come back to reality, as she snapped her head towards him, looking at him with confused green eyes, a slight frown on her face. "Why? Something happened?", she enquired to him, watching his face carefully. His next bowl of ramen was placed in front of him and he issued his thanks for the service, once again diving right into it. He took the time to think about how much he should tell her as he didn't want to see her hurt, but he also had been wondering about this off and on for the last few days.
Deciding to be honest about his feelings he continued speaking while eating, "You know how I love you, Sakura-chan?", slurp, "But I also love ramen, I love Kakashi-sensei, I love Baa-chan", bite and chew, "and I also love our team and lots of other things. What is the difference?", he finished asking his question, gulping down his bite. He watched as a smile slowly spread on her face, her emerald eyes shining with mirth as she said in amusement, "Baka ne", affectionately before closing her eyes and shaking her head lightly.
That caught his attention as he looked at her with hurtful eyes, his brows furrowed in confusion at what this big secret was that she seems to know about him but he couldn't figure it out however hard he tried. "Sakura-chan..", he let out another whine to get back her attention on him, pleased when she turned her eyes back at him and spoke up, "There are different kinds of love, Naruto. The most powerful kind is when you love someone special in your life, someone you always think about and that person makes you happy, gives you strength to go on. It's very different from your love for ramen. Do you understand?", with a kind smile on her face.
Not understanding what exactly made those two things different, he scratched the back of his head and stated excitedly, "But ramen makes me happy too, dattebayo! I always think about ramen, and I always feel strong after a meal!" As soon as these words slipped out, he leaned back away from her, as he saw her smile slip off and annoyance reflect in her eyes. He knew what was coming next, hoping she would be gentle this time as he heard her say emphatically, "It's not at all the same thing! Kono baka!", before she humphed and turned away from him towards the bar, starting on her meal.
Feeling chastised and none of his queries answered, he too turned back to his bowl, taking a peek at her beside him. Sure, he had managed to anger her but at least she wasn't sulking anymore, which was a win in his book. Smiling at this little accomplishment, he took in a deep breath of the fragrant aroma of his second bowl this morning and continued with his meal. At least, he would always have ramen. He would also always have Sakura, he thought peeking at her once again, watching as she daintily took a bite out of a piece of fishcake topping from her chopsticks.
Yes, he was sure Sakura was always going to be there for him, they had gone through too much together for anything else. He did love her, although not as desperately as he had once wanted her affections in their genin days. She was someone who had been constant in his life for a long time and she was safe, she shouted at him, scolded him, supported him and everything else in between. She understood him well, and he had no doubts in his mind that regardless of all their friendly quarrels and disagreements, she would always be there the next day for him, she was dependable like that. She was more than family to him and he would happily sacrifice his life for her, including his own happiness if that's what was needed. That's what he had to do when he had realised that she would never love him back the way he wanted from her, her heart would always belong to someone else.
Then there was Hinata. Hinata embodied everything that wasn't safe, everything that made him anxious and apprehensive. You would think, with how nervous and shy she usually is, it would be the opposite, but in reality it was always him who was left confused and on his backfoot every time she was near him. There was just something about her that he never had been able to figure out in all of these years. He loved her too, he would go to any lengths to protect her, just as he would do for any of his comrades. Nevertheless, he could never begin to understand what she thought of him from many of the times they had interacted with each other.
When they were younger, he had first thought she was weird and pretty much invisible. He never noticed her around even though she was always there, often hiding herself in the background. Sure, the shyness and fainting spells didn't help her case either. However, she always had strength in her spirit, something that he admired in people, along with some ethereal quality to her that compelled him to protect her, not that he ever believed that she was weak. She was also one of those people who had always been kind to him without fail, he couldn't remember a single time that she had spoken a cruel word about him or even be rude to anyone in general, another quality about her that he liked.
All in all, he liked her as a person, admired her as a kunoichi and wanted to be there for her just like she had been there for him in his darkest moments. He knew that the village wouldn't exist today if it wasn't for her jumping in, sacrificing herself, to protect him when Pain had attacked Konoha. That day, he had believed that she had died for him in front of his eyes and the fact that he couldn't protect her, watching her bleed out helplessly from the ground had resulted in him losing his control. The thought of living in a world where she no longer existed had been too much for him to bear through and all he wanted, at that time, was to watch the world burn just as he was inflamed on the inside. Thankfully, his father had talked sense into him, his spirit gave him strength to make the right decisions later on.
She had also been there for him during the war, when he was on the verge of losing hope, losing himself again, after Neji gave his life for him. She had stood by him, time and time again, encouraging him and supporting him, asking nothing in return for it. If she hadn't been by his side that time, deep down he knew the world as everyone knew it would have been over already. Everyone credited him for his accomplishments but she was one of those few people, without whom he would have been completely lost, or worse.
He had tried many times to spend more time with her since he was sure he would enjoy her company, but then for some reason she would always either faint or run away from him, neither of which he understood. So, he had kept his distance, the best he could without seeming like he was deliberately avoiding her, as he didn't want to lose her kindness, her compassion towards him. It's one of those little things that he enjoyed very much and couldn't imagine not having in his life anymore.
A few days ago, Sasuke had said that he loved Hinata, how was that any different from how he felt about her, he had no clue. Doesn't everybody love her? He couldn't recall anyone who held a grudge against her, everyone liked her as far as he knew and spoke fondly about her. When he had revealed that bit of information to him, Sasuke had only said that it wasn't the same thing, exactly what Sakura had said a few moments ago. How come everybody around him seemingly understood it except him? Then there was Sasuke acting weird around her, he followed her around, he stared at her and even took her to his place right from the training grounds. Why would he choose to do such odd things, so out of character for him, he didn't understand.
That day he had felt anger when he had seen the two at the Uchiha district, first thinking it was out of instinct to protect her. Sasuke wasn't always known for his good behavior, but even he knew his best friend well enough to realise it was unusual for him to act like that. Later he had admitted to himself that he held some amount of resentment towards the Uchiha for what he was trying to do to Hinata. It was Sasuke after all, someone who never took any interest in girls all his life as far as he could remember, then why the sudden preoccupation with her? He knew it was childish to think so but he was upset when the thought came to mind that Sasuke wanted her compassion and kindness too, just like him, and was essentially trying to take it from the same person on whom he depended on for it.
It wasn't that Hinata's capacity for generosity was finite, but in his mind he always believed that he was somehow special in her eyes, since she believed in him when no one else would. No one else looked at him the way she did, however brief those eye contacts might have been. But, at the end of the day, he knew he didn't have a right to complain about it, could he really fault the guy for wanting something that he himself enjoyed? What he didn't understand though was how were Sasuke's feelings for Hinata different from his own? Didn't both of them want the same things from her?
He didn't realise how deep in his own thoughts he was until he felt Sakura elbow him on his arm which snapped him back to reality. He turned to face her, watching her sympathetic eyes and a small kind smile on her face, as he heard her speak to him with concern, "Don't worry so much about it, Naruto. I think you'll know when it happens, it will become self-evident when you fall in love." "How?", the question slipped out of him without a second of thought behind it. He watched as her smile turned in an ironic sad grin before she turned her eyes, staring far off wistfully as she answered, "You'll just know, you won't be able to stop it from happening. That person would mean so much more to you than anyone else, you would want to spend the rest of your life with them. When you realise that even the thought of living without that person in your life leaves you heartbroken and if you lost them, it would be like your life holds no meaning, that's when you can be sure."
Naruto stared at her for a few seconds before nodding grimly, the fact that most of those things were already true about how he felt about Sakura, didn't escape him. He wondered if what she was telling him was also how Sasuke felt about Hinata, or if Sakura was just describing how she felt about Sasuke. Their personal lives were surely an entangled web of feelings at the moment, that was for sure. "Anyway, I need to go pick up my kimono for Ino's birthday tonight. I'll see you there. And you better wear something nice for a change. It's a special day for her", he heard her scold him and watched her getting up from her seat, dropping a few coins on the table for her meal. "See you tonight, Sakura-chan!", he replied happily, excited at the thought of seeing her in a new outfit later, as she left the place.
He quickly finished his bowl which had already gone cold during their conversation, paid for his share, and left the place with his thanks and goodbyes to the owner of the ramen stand. He clasped his fingers together, placing his palms behind his head and walked leisurely towards the market to pick up his own yukata that he had ordered for the special occasion tonight. Sakura was right, it was an important day for Ino, not only was she turning eighteen but also would be officially appointed as the head of the Yamanaka clan. He was going to attend as her friend during the ceremony in the evening, as will the rest of the rookies, but he was excited to have the whole gang together once again in the after party she had planned at her family's flower shop.
He was about to turn the corner which led to the shop he had to go to, when he heard, "..should go for it Hina! Don't wait for Naruto no Baka to figure it out, it won't happen", in an enthusiastic voice which sounded exactly like Tenten's. He quickly rounded the corner to see Tenten had her fist pumped in the air with a blushing, embarrassed Hinata, as usual, beside her who had a paper bag clasped tightly to her chest, arms crossed over it, both coming out of the same store that was his destination. Even though he was miffed at being called an idiot by two different people at completely unrelated occasions within a span of an hour, he was more interested to learn what it was that they were talking about, so he asked, "Wait for me to figure out what?", clearly confused, stepping closer to the pair.
He watched both of them snap their heads towards him, Tenten giving him a sly smirk which quickly vanished as Hinata peeped out, "Tenten-chan!", blushing madly, staring at her feet. He saw Tenten give Hinata a look which went unnoticed by the timid girl who didn't raise her head and he blurted out, "What, dattebayo?", feeling like he was the butt of some joke that he didn't get to hear. "Nandemonai", Tenten said emphatically after heaving a huge sigh, waving her hand dismissively in the air, continuing after a brief pause, "I'll see you tonight, Naruto", looking right at him, flashing him a quick smile. The fact that nobody was laughing was making him feel better about not getting to know what the big secret was. He saw Tenten lay her hand on Hinata's shoulder and state after turning her eyes on her, "Remember what I said, Hinata. Think about it." Hinata gave her a quick nod, muttering "Arigatou, Tenten-chan", quietly without raising her eyes to look at either of them. "Hm, ja ne!", Tenten exclaimed before she left, walking quickly in the opposite direction he came from.
This left the both of them alone in front of the store, and his eyes landed on the paper parcel she was carrying in her arms, since she wasn't looking at him there wasn't much else to see, something he was quite used to by now. "You were picking up a new outfit for tonight too, Hinata-chan?", he asked conversationally, grinning at her. He watched her frown first, then turn her eyes to the parcel at her chest, followed by looking up at him and then quickly averted her eyes off to the side, her checks glowing red, as she spoke softly, "No, it's for.. Sasuke-kun.." Hearing that, a familiar sense of bitterness stirred in his gut, but he ignored it, masking the feeling with overt outwardly cheeriness. "Why would you have his stuff, Hina-chan? Is the bastard making you do chores for him?", he asked in a tone that was joking, as if just making fun.
Those words got her attention as she quickly turned her eyes back to him and rushed to explain, "Not at all, Naruto-kun! It's a gift for him. An Uchiha haori, since he took the position of the head of his clan he will have to attend the ceremony this evening in official capacity… that's all", she finished in a voice barely above a whisper, lowing her eyes once again, and he had to strain his ears to catch the last few phrases. What surprised him though, was that now apparently the two of them had progressed to giving each other gifts, or at least she was giving one to him. Which shouldn't really have surprised him, since she was always thoughtful and kind in her gestures, but that didn't mean the feeling in his gut didn't intensify when he heard that coming out of her.
Giving her one of his best smiles, he exclaimed, "That's so nice of you, Hinata-chan!" and enjoyed when she stuttered and blushed her way into thanking him for the compliment. Feeling like he needed to change the topic, before he blurted out something stupid, he looked at her for a beat and asked, "Hinata-chan, that day, what did you want to tell me? It was something important you said", watching her eyes widen in horror momentarily as a gasp escaped her lips. She turned her eyes to his own next and apologised, "Gomen, Naruto-kun. I have been.. distracted lately, I forgot to tell you about it." Feeling anxious at her apparent distress, he tried to reassure her saying, "It's okay, Hina-chan. You can tell me now, whatever it is I'll fix it, believe it!", and he meant it too.
She gave him one of her warm smiles he loved to receive and enjoyed the admiration shining in her eyes that made him feel ten times taller, as he heard her say, "Thank you, Naruto-kun. I believe you", those words from her made the tightness in his gut disappear and instead bloomed a warm fuzzy feeling in his chest, he couldn't help but grin widely at her for that. He watched her turn her eyes to the side instantly, her face growing serious before she continued, "It's about the camps outside the village where I volunteer. An elderly man there told me about some rumors of a planned conflict between the shinobi living there and our village. They have some grievances against us, even if we tried our best to help them. I will have to report this to Lord Sixth, but the civilians in the camps pleaded with me to convince him to spare them. I am not sure if I can do that and.. that's why I need your help, Naruto-kun.."
Naruto felt his eyes widen as well as his eyebrows lift up at that bit of information he wasn't aware of. He kept himself up to date on the goings of the village but he had no idea such a thing was happening right outside the walls. He, of course, knew of all the spy missions his sensei had sent ninja teams to, gathering information on rebel groups forming all over the map, after the war officially ended. However, he had to admit that she was right, there were civilians too in the camps, the elderly as well as children and they couldn't shirk their ethical responsibility to help them.
He gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile, as he said, "Don't worry about it, Hinata-chan. I understand and I'll take care of it. I'll talk to Kakashi-sensei about it tomorrow, alright?" As soon as he finished, he saw relief clearly on her face as her shoulders sagged slightly with it. She smiled warmly up to him once again, a light sprinkling of red dusting her cheeks, as she thanked him kindly, "Arigatou, Naruto-kun. Please inform me if a decision is made", giving him a low bow, which he didn't know how to respond to.
He sheepishly rubbed the back of his head, letting a chuckle out and replied, "Of course, Hina-chan! You can come to me any time, dattebayo." Once she straightened her frame, he asked her, unable to stop the question from coming out of him, "I'll see you tonight then?" She blushed prettily at that, averting her eyes from his once more and replied with a simple, "Hai", in her gentle voice. After a few beats, she spoke up once again, "Ja ne, Naruto-kun", and he watched her turn around, walking off into the distance, muttering, "Ja", at her.
Maybe, he didn't fully understand what was going on with her, or with Sasuke, or Sakura, but, he realised, as long as she continued to be in his life, looking up at him like that as she always does, he didn't really care. Whatever happens, he has always had her and he was confident that he will continue to always have her, that's all that mattered to him in the end. With that, he stuffed his hands in his pockets and made his way to the store to pick up his outfit for the night.
A/N : Well, it seems like I have two different types of responses on how readers want this story to progress, one side wants more sweet and the other prefers a darker Sasuke. Honestly, I have tried to keep a balance of the two, but this is essentially a love story and there is bound to be some conflict. For anyone interested, I would recommend reading between the lines of Sasuke's explanation in Ch 4 of IAWS, that should give you hints on how this story will progress. I don't want to reveal too much and spoil it for everyone, beyond the warnings in Ch 1 of this fic. As far as the events of Ch 8 are concerned, it will be revealed later what happened and why, but imo even though the r word has been used for it already(I did try my best to keep it as iffy as I could), the worst is yet to come, dear readers. I don't wish to turn anybody off from reading this story but I can promise that I will try my best to justify everyone's motivations, specially Sasuke. I agree with some reviewers who said that shifting of Hinata's feelings from Naruto to Sasuke won't be easy and I agree that something really drastic has to happen for that. And something drastic will happen, later though. For all the readers who want more Sasuhina fluff, I hope to deliver some come SasuHina month as I have mentioned before. That's all. See you next time!