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TW: car accidents, Oliver Hasegawa's death
When Reki finally woke up in the hospital, he felt utterly exhausted and needed a moment to shake his dazed and confused state to remember what had happened. And where he even was. When he looked around the room, he realized he was in a hospital, and all the events flickered through his mind.
"Langa!" he exclaimed in a panic, shooting up. Not a good idea because he felt dizzy again. When he saw Langa in the bed next to him, relief rushed through him, and he lay back down again. He rubbed his temples to soothe his splitting headache.
No wonder he felt like a truck had run him over. He had just drained his spiritual energy to the max with his teleportation. As a result, he had fainted. At least, he assumed that was what had happened. He only remembered that he had landed in front of the hospital and Langa's panicked face before everything had turned black.
He wondered why he had woken up. Given his dizziness and headache, the reason wasn't a thorough rest and a complete recovery from his reckless teleportation in a desperate attempt to save Langa. He was neither well rested nor had he fully recovered yet. So, why was he awake?
Their room was silent, and they were alone so that it hadn't been the hectic here or the usual hospital noises. It hadn't been something physical like a touch or a voice or whispered conversations, either.
With a start, he realized that the soul bond to Langa had urged him to wake up. The longer he stared at Langa's sleeping form, the more he realized that his headache and dizziness weren't caused by him draining all his spiritual energy. His spiritual power hadn't recovered completely, but the majority had been replenished. It was Langa that was causing his massive headache.
He tried sitting up again, slower this time while shielding his face from the bright light streaming into the room with one hand. He still felt a bit dizzy, and his head hurt as if split in two, but otherwise, he was fine.
He didn't know how many days had passed, but that wasn't important right now. He glanced at Langa, who slept soundly. Or so it seemed on the surface. There was a bandage on his head, and his wrist was in a cast, but he was safe, and his injuries had been treated, so his reckless action had been worth it.
He was a little proud that he had managed to save Langa. If he was honest with himself, he hadn't thought the odds would work in their favor. First, teleportation was a highly advanced skill, and he was a mere beginner. Second, not many people had succeeded in doing so twice in one day and especially across continents, and had survived that reckless use of soulmate powers. And last but not least, his first attempt had been pure instinct because he had feared for his soulmate's life, so he had no clue how to initiate or control teleportation.
Yet, it had been enough for him that Langa had believed in him. And the realization that they would both die if he failed. Langa hadn't just pretended; he had truly meant it. Reki had felt his steadfast belief in him through the bond. He doubted Langa was even capable of lying or pretending. In the end, it had all worked out somehow. Maybe they were a good match, after all?
He was relieved that that Langa was safe. His physical injuries would heal. And yet, the bond had woken him up, so his soul was bruised, too, only those wounds were invisible from the outside. However, that didn't mean they were less significant. When he emptied a glass of water next to his bed, his dizziness slowly faded away, and he could think more clearly.
Still, he needed a few minutes to be fully alert to notice what the bond was trying to tell him. Why precisely had the bond woken him up? Langa was sleeping soundly, yet his soul was screaming out in pain. He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate on the bond. Langa's memories flashed through his mind; most were happy memories: snowboarding with his dad, competitions, his mom making breakfast, the three of them on vacation in the mountains or at a lake.
However, the memories that flashed through his mind darkened with every passing moment. They rushed through his mind lightning fast, making him dizzy again. At the end, the images got blurry and unfocused. It felt as if Langa's memories were hazy or had some holes. Or some missing puzzle pieces.
At first, he assumed that had to do with the state he was in, that he hadn't fully recovered yet and had lost focus. Still, when trying to dive into his thoughts and tap into his side of the bond to find out the reason, he hit a dead end. Every time he tried, he slammed into a wall, some memory he couldn't access. Langa didn't block the memory on purpose, but he subconsciously suppressed the memory, shoving it into the back of his mind, probably to protect himself. From a bad memory or experience. He wondered what it could be... If he knew, maybe, he could help him.
Despite his weakened state, he still went to Langa on wobbly legs, sat down at his bedside, and took his good hand. He was especially alarmed when he saw something on the back of his hand. The soul mark was glowing brightly. The snowflake had enlarged, covering the back of his hand entirely, and had turned to an orange color, the sign of danger. Red meant mortal danger, while orange was the lighter version which could escalate to grave danger if he didn't do something. Anything.
This time, however, the danger didn't come from his physical injuries but his soul. Even so, Reki couldn't break through the wall he had set up around his memories. The only thing he managed to do was get an even worse headache from it that felt like a giant hammer slamming into his skull, stars exploding in front of his vision, so he didn't see anything for a moment. And if he kept trying, he'd risk hurting Langa or himself. He tried to take some deep breaths to ease the pain and looked at Langa's sleeping form.
He felt through their connection how Langa's soul was suffering. There was darkness shrouding his soul that he didn't like. It affected the bond and his own mood, too. This deep-rooted memory was probably the reason he didn't wake up. And why his soul was writhing in agony.
This time, it required a lot of effort to shield himself from Langa's pain, probably because they were closer together now and the emotions were more intense but also because he hadn't fully recovered. He tried to control the bond, but he couldn't do so for long. In his current state, he'd lose focus eventually. So, he didn't have much time.
He was so deep in thought and focused on the bond that he only noticed now that someone had moved on the other side of Langa's bed. To his defense, the woman had leaned over and had slept with her head resting on the edge of Langa's bed. Langa's body had shielded her from view so that Reki couldn't see her from the other side of the bed. He nearly jumped when she started speaking, too fixated on his soulmate to notice anything or anyone else.
She was more or less the same age as his mom and looked strangely familiar. However, Reki couldn't place her at first. She had a slim figure, chestnut brown hair tied back, and wore a sad smile on her face. Her brown eyes were bloodshot as if she hadn't slept in days. She looked as exhausted and pale as he felt. He wished he knew who she was. Suddenly, she looked up at him and smiled. Judging by her reaction, she definitely knew who he was.
"Hello, you're Reki, right? Are you fine? You look awfully pale. Maybe you should lie down again?" Despite her exhaustion, her eyes were soft and overwhelmed by compassion and worry.
"I'm fine!" Reki stubbornly lashed out at her. "Who are you anyway?"
Seeing her look, he immediately regretted it. Langa's dark emotions and his headache didn't really improve his mood.
"I'm sorry for my rude outburst. I shouldn't have raised my voice. You seem familiar to me, but I can't figure out who you are. I have a splitting headache, so my mood isn't the best right now. But I wanted to check on Langa."
"It's okay. I'm grateful that you care for Langa so much. I'm Nanako Hasegawa - "
"That's why you looked so familiar! You're Langa's mom!" Reki exclaimed in astonishment, forgetting his pain for a moment.
He was rewarded with a smile.
"Yes, I am. I assumed you saw me in those spirit dreams, right? Your mom is here, too. She just asked me to look after you two while she bought the twins something to drink."
Reki nodded. "I see. And I did see you in those dreams. I also saw Langa's dad and your house, too. Your home looked different from Japan but really nice."
Tears suddenly rolled down her eyes, and Reki wondered what he had done now. He rewound their conversation but couldn't find anything that would cause such an emotional reaction from her.
"I'm sorry. Have I said something wrong?"
She shook her head and wiped away her tears
"No, Reki, you didn't. I'm so glad you're Langa's soulmate. Thank you so much for saving my son. I don't know what I would have done if I had lost him, too."
Tears rolled down her face again, so Reki went over to her and sat beside her. He laid a hand on her shoulder to calm her down. He wanted to do more but thought that might be overstepping boundaries. She was Langa's mom, but they had just met for the first time five minutes ago.
He was utterly lost and wondered what she meant by her last sentence. When she had wiped her tears away and had composed herself again, she looked at him again.
"I'm sorry, I usually don't break down crying in front of strangers. However, you're not a stranger. More like a distant family member I haven't met yet. Langa talked about you all the time. Which was highly unusual because he's terrible at communicating normally."
Reki grinned when hearing that. "Yes, I noticed that. At the beginning, I almost didn't notice his presence. But if I paid close attention, I noticed that he was just calmer and quieter than me. His soothing presence helped me a lot. He always stays calm and has a cool aura that puts me at ease, too."
His mom smiled at him. "I'm glad Langa has someone as kind as you as a soulmate. He's lonely even if he's too stubborn to admit that."
After a moment, Reki found the courage to ask what she had meant with that sentence—the one about losing someone else.
"What did you mean by 'if I lost him, too' just now?"
"So, it's what I assumed. You don't know what happened. The spirit dreams only show you memories that give you clues about your soulmate's personality or character traits. So, it makes sense that they didn't show you the latest tragedy Langa and I faced," she explained while wiping away her remaining tears.
"You're scaring me. Please tell me what happened. I've already noticed that Langa's soul is in pain. That's why I woke up. When I tried to reach him through the bond, I noticed that he suppresses a memory to protect himself. So I would have asked you about it anyway, even if this isn't a polite conversation starter. I want to help him."
His mom nodded, and Reki saw her eyes darkening again and her hands trembling, gripping the chair so hard her knuckles turned white. Reki felt that something terrible had occurred. Something that had changed their lives forever...
"Two weeks ago, Langa's dad suddenly died. It wasn't something we could prepare for like a sickness. He died in a car accident on the way home. I don't know what exactly happened, but his car drifted off the road and... He instantly died."
Reki's eyes widened, and he stared at her in shock. This time, he felt how tears pricked at his eyes, too. He couldn't imagine how awful that had to be for Langa. His dad was the most important person in his life, his whole world. He had felt and seen it in those spirit dreams. The dreams, however, had never mentioned anything like that. Why hadn't he noticed the change in Langa? He should have felt his deep sorrow and tremendous grief through the bond..
You didn't know that because you blocked the bond to your soulmate, idiot, at a time when he desperately needed your support. If you hadn't done that, you'd have noticed his pain and sorrow and could have comforted him. With a soulmate like you, who needs enemies? Great work, Reki.
Reki felt like the worst person ever. How could he abandon Langa at such a time? He was the worst... This had been Langa's worst moment; his whole life had crumbled down and turned to ashes. And he had left him all alone with his pain... And his mom was probably as devastated.
And he had only thought about himself, as self-centered as he was. He honestly wished the ground would open up beneath him and swallow him. This had been the worst decision of his life!
Even so, this wasn't the time to feel sorry for himself. He wouldn't make the same mistake again! Langa needed him now. He could explain everything to him later. And sincerely apologize.
He leaned closer and slowly hugged her.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know. That must have been hard for you. And for Langa, too."
When Reki pulled out of the hug, Langa's mom looked gratefully at him and smiled sadly, then nodded.
"Thank you."
"But it explains his reckless behavior. He practically jumped off a cliff. He told me he was lost in thought, but I've always felt this explanation was only the tip of the iceberg. If I didn't know any better, I would have thought he wanted to kill himself. However, Langa would never do that to you. He's just fearless and has no sense for his own safety."
"Yes, that's true. He snowboarded recklessly at times. Oliver, Langa's dad, said it was fine, that he trusted him. He's an amazing snowboarder with a good instinct and a quick reaction, so he rarely got injured. When he told me he wanted to snowboard again, I assumed it was a good idea, so I allowed it. Maybe it was my mistake as well. I knew that he snowboarded recklessly at times. And his dad's death had a great impact on him. In retrospect, it wasn't a good decision on my part, either."
"He probably thought that if he snowboarded, he could reconnect with his dad or their memories together and feel something again. Only, he noticed that snowboarding was only fun together with him. That it wasn't snowboarding he loved but his dad's company. When he snowboarded again, he noticed that he was lost without him and did something drastic without thinking of the consequences."
This is my fault, too. But I've already felt sorry for myself for too long, and that's exactly how I hurt Langa. This time, I'll be there for him and make up for it.
"Thank you, Reki. You know Langa well, which is amazing when you couldn't use telepathy with each other. Langa isn't expressive or emotional, so I don't always know what's going on inside of him. Still, he was exceptionally close to his dad, and after his death, he was only an empty shell and became even quieter. He withdrew completely into himself and just stayed in his room. I worry about him," she explained sincerely to him.
"However, a few weeks before his death, your soul bond started, and Langa cheered up since then. I assumed that was a good sign. I'm also convinced you softened the blow and saved him from drowning in despair after his dad died. But then..."
She left the end of the sentence hanging in the air. It wasn't necessary to say more. Reki knew he had caused Langa to suffer. He had let him down and had left him all alone when he was lost and had needed a pillar of strength. He wished he could undo it, but that was impossible. However, he was here now and would set things right.
"That was my fault. I'm so sorry about that. I hurt Langa because I blocked the bond to him. I was an idiot..." Reki replied nervously, too afraid to look into her eyes and see her shocked reaction.
"Why did you do that?" she asked him. Her voice wasn't angry or scolding as he had expected. It wasn't an accusation; it sounded more like she just wanted an explanation which put him at ease a bit. He finally met her eyes again.
"When I saw Langa's memories, he seemed so perfect. He was handsome, cool, and a professional and successful athlete heading for the Olympics. I felt so useless and insignificant compared to him. I doubted that we were a good match because I assumed there was nothing I could do for him. I felt like fate had made a mistake. Langa helped me a lot, but I didn't see how I could ever support him. My emotions are always extreme because I'm empathetic. I always feel emotions very intensely, my own and those of the people around me, so I overreacted," Reki tried to explain his selfish behavior to her. Even if she hated him now, she deserved to know the truth.
To his utter astonishment, she smiled at him.
"Thanks, Reki. For telling me the truth. Lying or blaming others is easy. Admitting your own mistakes, however, takes courage. It proves that you are an amazing person and that Langa is lucky to have you. And fate is never wrong. I think you're a good match. Your presence helped Langa so much. He withdrew from his shell and tried to be there for me after his dad's death. I think that was your influence. You gave him hope again."
Relief rushed through Reki, and he relaxed slightly. Maybe, if his mom understood his motives and forgave him, Langa would react similarly.
"I didn't know that blocking the bond would cause Langa pain, or I would never have done that. I wanted to undo the block, but I didn't know how to do that," he added, looking down at his hands. He still felt guilty about that.
"Then, how did you notice Langa's desperate situation?" she asked curiously.
"Langa's intense panic and fear broke through the bond. I woke up screaming one night because excruciating pain shot through my body. I was utterly defenseless because I had been asleep. I felt Langa's unbearable pain and saw some images of what had happened. Langa telepathically asked me for help, and I felt his fear through the bond. Langa's emotions are always calm, so his raw fear shocked me, and I knew it was serious."
"Wow, Langa's emotions broke through your block? You must have an exceptionally close bond if your emotions can undo a block."
"I don't know about that. I think it was because Langa was scared to death. Anyway, we suddenly realized we could send telepathic messages, probably because our emotions were so extreme at that moment. My soul mark was flaming red; that's how I knew Langa was in grave danger."
Langa's mom looked at the back of his hand and the soul mark covering it. "A snowflake. That fits Langa perfectly. And the flame is a perfect symbol for you as well."
"I desperately wished to reach him, to be by his side. To save him. My parents told me that was impossible, but I didn't want to give up that easily. I couldn't just do nothing if I knew he was seriously hurt. And the next thing I know is that my surroundings went blurry, and then I was standing in the middle of a snowstorm in some Canadian mountains. Not far away from Langa. I'm sorry I hurt Langa. It won't happen again."
"I'm so glad you found him. He would have died otherwise... And teleportation is a rare and advanced skill. It's incredible that you managed to do that. And even twice. That's admirable. Your soulmate powers must be strong if you could pull that off."
Reki felt how his cheeks heated up in embarrassment and looked away. His mom placed a hand on his shoulder, which surprised him, and he looked at her again.
"Reki, a new soul bond is an adventure into unknown territory. It's not always easy at the beginning, especially without telepathy. You two will make mistakes and learn from them. But in the end, you'll figure it out. For me, it's enough that Langa is safe."
"But that's the point! He isn't safe!" Reki exclaimed, rubbing his temples.
"What do you mean? His injuries have been treated, so he's not in pain anymore. He's sleeping peacefully."
"I'm not referring to his physical injuries. He's hurting inside, and his soul is screaming in pain. His pain is killing me. My headache is caused by him, not by my teleportation or exhaustion. He won't wake up until I find a way to reach him. He doesn't want to wake up. Waking up means that he has to face his dad's death. He set up a wall to protect himself. His dad's death left him all alone, especially because he couldn't feel our bond anymore. He probably assumed I blocked him again. Or worse, he destroyed our bond by asking me for help and dragging me into his difficult situation.
"The bond disappeared because you were unconscious?" His mom guessed, staring at him in horror.
Reki nodded. "I'm sure that Langa doesn't know that a bond is gone temporarily when a soulmate faints. Or that it returns as soon as a soulmate regains consciousness. So, he probably thinks the bond is gone forever."
"That sounds bad. Isn't there anything we could do? If I tried to wake him up, that wouldn't work, right?"
"Probably not. He'll only wake up if he realizes that he isn't alone. Right now, he's drowning in darkness and thinks that everyone has left him. You can try, but I don't think our voices will be enough to wake him up."
"What can we do? Can't you use telepathy to help him?"
"In Canada, you don't learn much about soul bonds, do you? In Japan, we learn about that in school. Is it true that you grew up here?
"Yes. Back when I was a kid here, soul bonds weren't a subject taught at school. They only started lessons after some soulmates caused accidents and someone even died. That's when they took it more seriously and decided it should be a compulsory subject to avoid dangerous situations. In Canada, many soulmates never live close or meet, so many people stopped believing in it. People eventually assumed it was just a myth. You know firsthand how difficult it is to communicate across continents."
"I see. That makes sense, but it's a bit sad. Were you and Langa's dad soulmates?"
"We were. Langa only believes in soulmates because he witnessed our soul bond each day and because we told him that he would find his soulmate soon. I think the idea gave Langa hope since he had no friends."
"Yes, I looked forward to the soul bond as well. My parents are soul mates as well, and I've always thought that such a deep connection is beautiful."
"It is, but there are two sides to everything. Finding your soulmate is an incredible feeling. Losing your soulmate, however, is the most excruciating pain ever. No one should ever go through such pain. If a soulmate dies, his better half is likely to follow him into death. Unless there's something that still ties or connects them to this world."
"You mean Langa," Reki replied, looking at his sleeping figure.
She nodded. "I only got through this because of him. I love him unconditionally. Without him, I would have given up. I had to live for him. I couldn't leave him all alone. He's different from other kids his age. However, his dad always called it special. It's true, given his amazing talent in snowboarding. His dad had a deeper connection to him and always seemed to know what was going on in his mind. He always assured me Langa would be fine, and he'd find friends at his own pace. Still, I worried about him because he never connected with his classmates. He's always spacing out and a daydreamer. I wished he'd spend more time with people his age. With someone like you."
"I'm glad you're still by his side. I can see that you still struggle and that this whole situation is hard on you. But you and Langa still have each other. If I can help you in any way, I will."
"Thanks. I think we'll be fine. We just need a little time to recover. I'm sure you can help Langa just by staying by his side."
Reki nodded thoughtfully, then turned to look at Langa and contemplated in his mind what his options were. If his headache didn't disappear soon, he'd faint again. He didn't have enough strength left to control the bond and shield himself from Langa's pain. His pain was too intense, and he couldn't focus hard enough to succeed. The fastest option was to get Langa to wake up. That wouldn't stop his pain but talking about it or comforting him probably would. Maybe his presence alone or that of his mom would soothe his torment.
"Using telepathy on unconscious people is not a good idea. Some people get scared and confused because they don't realize it's telepathy. They think they have lost their mind because they hear voices inside their heads. It could put his mind at risk. Maybe I could send him some images of you and me. Or some spiritual energy."
"Haven't you just recovered yours?"
"Yes, most of it. But if Langa feels my warmth, he'll maybe wake up. Don't worry. I'll just need a little amount."
Reki took Langa's hand and closed his eyes, concentrating on sending him images of both his mom and himself. Langa's eyelids started to flicker, and he mumbled their names, but he wouldn't wake up. Not yet, at least. However, Reki was only getting started.
Reki did the same again, but this time he placed his other hand on his chest and sent him some spiritual energy, not much, just tiny sparks of warmth. He had done the same when Langa hadn't woken up in the cold woods in Canada, so he assumed that Langa felt the warmth. Hopefully, it felt familiar, and he remembered the sensation. And his presence.
He noticed how Langa stirred a little, which was a good sign. So, now that he was close to waking up, he sent him some telepathic thoughts.
'Langa, please wake up. You're not alone. Your mom is here waiting for you. Don't make her worry so much. And I'm here, too. You can feel my presence, right? We're waiting for you, so wake up, sleeping beauty."
"Reki..."
"Mom"
Langa mumbled in a low voice, then slowly opened his eyes, blinking a few times. Reki felt his relief and happiness when he recognized him. And confusion and worry when seeing his mom, which made sense since Langa wondered how much time had passed and how she had gotten here. He wanted to get up but winced at once. Reki reacted before he could lift himself and pushed him down again, gently but firmly.
"Langa, I'm also happy to see you and that you're finally awake, but this is not a good idea. First, you have two broken ribs, and second, you have a concussion. Please listen to me, ok?"
Langa pouted and crossed his arms in defiance, then flinched when he touched the bruised spot of skin covering his fractured ribs. Reki felt the pain resonating through the bond and cast him a knowing glance.
"Told you so, dummy. And did you just pout at me? How old are you, five? he chuckled softly. "When I imagined our first meeting, pouting wasn't on my list," he added, winking at him.
"This isn't our first meeting. That was back in Canada." Reki smirked, amused by his bluntness.
"True, but that doesn't count. You were barely conscious back then. So, welcome to Okinawa! We're finally together!" Reki beamed at him, his pain forgotten over his excitement that they could finally talk face to face.
Langa smiled weakly at him.
"Thanks for saving me. I'm glad to meet you, too, finally. Where are we? Is this the hospital in Okinawa you took us to? And are you fine? Don't you need to rest? You look pale."
"That's the point. I couldn't rest because your soul was screaming in pain. It was so intense it woke me up. Your torment was killing me. It gave me a splitting headache, which is impressive since our bond was partly numbed by the painkillers you were given. You wouldn't wake up, so I had to try reaching the bond. Are you feeling better now? Your pain lessened a little."
"Yes, I'm better now. I'm sorry, Reki. Thank you for everything. The bond to you was gone, so..."
"The bond disappeared when I fainted. I'll explain that later. I promise. First, there's someone else who wants to see you."
He moved away from the bed, glancing at his mom for a moment, and she understood and approached, smiling gratefully at him. She softly looked at Langa with tears in her eyes and gently removed some strands from his face.
"Langa, sweetie, are you okay? I was so worried. When I got a call that you were in Okinawa, my first thought was to hang up. I mean, why would you be in Japan when we live in Canada? Then, Masae mentioned you were her son's soulmate. And that Reki had teleported to you and dragged you here. It still sounded unreal, but then she said you were hurt and in a hospital. That changed everything. I flew here immediately. I couldn't lose you, too. Tears pricked at
Langa turned to his mom and smiled, lifting a hand to wipe her tears away.
"Mom... I'm sorry for everything I put you through. I thought that snowboarding would bring me closer to dad. To the memories, I shared with him. But it wasn't the same without him. I - Reki saved my life. Don't worry; I'm fine now. Is it okay that you're here? What about your work? I'm sorry for causing you trouble."
"Langa, don't worry. Everything's fine. I'm just glad you're safe. Just focus on your recovery. And of course, I flew to Japan as soon as I heard you were here. You're my son, and I love you. You know that, right?"
She gently touched his cheek and placed a quick kiss on his forehead.
"Yes, I love you, too."
"Thank you, Reki. I'll tell your mom and the doctor that you both woke up."
She smiled, got up, and left the room after glancing once more at her son. Reki suspected she wanted to let them talk privately and was grateful.
"So, now that we're closer together let me try something first. Give me your hand. Your good one, I mean."
He felt Langa's doubts and sent him a telepathic message.
'You trust me, right?'
Langa nodded, smiling faintly, and lifted his hand.
Reki intertwined their fingers, and Langa's eyes widened in surprise, making them light up in a mix of blue and green that reminded Reki of the ocean. Little sparks of electricity were dancing on the tips of their fingers before a warm light between their palms replaced them. Their soul marks started glowing and lifted off their palms, hovering between them at eye level. Langa looked at him in confusion, and he felt how he tensed up.
'Stay calm. This is the bond acknowledging us as soulmates. It's a confirmation of our bond. Or a welcoming gesture into the soulmate world'.
Langa immediately relaxed and fixed his gaze on their soul marks. A red thread wrapped around the soul marks, drawing them closer together, then it loosened again before vanishing into thin air, and the soul marks returned to their original place.
"What was that?" Langa exclaimed in confusion, staring at him wide-eyed.
"What did you see?" Reki asked curiously.
"A red thread around our soul marks? Why did it disappear again? I didn't imagine things, right? Have you seen it, too?"
Langa always forgot about telepathy and returned to regular speech when he was surprised, stunned, or confused. It was kind of cute.
'Yes, I've seen it. That red thread of fate connects us forever. It's only visible to us and undeniable proof that we're soulmates. If you ever need to find me, the red thread will always be your guide. If it appears before you out of nowhere, your soulmate is in danger, and it will lead you to me if you believe in it. You can always make it visible at will if you focus on seeing it. Otherwise, it will be invisible.'
'Oh, I see. It's our fail-safe mechanism?'
'Yes, in a way. And it's proof that we're destined to be together and share the same fate.'
He switched to normal speech because he knew the conversation would turn more serious now. They had to talk about some things. About the block. Langa's life-threatening stunt. And his dad. Telepathy worked extraordinarily for small talk.
For sincere talks, however, Reki preferred usual speech because the emotions came across way better through intonation, voice level, and other minor details you couldn't control via telepathy. Also, telepathy was challenging to control and focus on if you still had a headache caused by your soulmate. It had subsided, but it was still there.
"I'm so glad I saved you. That was a close call. But I'm happy it brought us closer together. Literally. For now, at least.
"Yes, that's great. The bond feels different now that I'm closer to you. It feels more intense and clearer. I'm just sorry that I endangered your life as well. I shouldn't have called you for help. But when I lay there in the darkness, you were the only one I could think of. So I tried to reach you."
"Why did you do something so reckless? You could have died, Langa! Have you ever thought about your mom when doing that? I know that I'm partly responsible, and I've seen the reckless way you snowboard at times, but this wasn't reckless. That jump was extremely dangerous and suicidal."
"I didn't want to die! I wanted to live! To feel something! Anything at all! Feel alive again!" Langa exclaimed, his blue eyes burning into him.
"I couldn't die yet because I wanted to meet you. Ask you why you left me alone." He grimaced in pain at the sudden movement.
"Langa... Calm down. I know that. It was a desperate cry for help. And I'm sorry about leaving you all alone. I didn't know about your dad... or I would have never left you alone with your grief."
He pushed him into the cushions again, then took his hand. Langa avoided his gaze, but Reki had still seen the tears welling up in his eyes before he stubbornly wiped them away with his sleeve.
"I hoped I could relive the happy memories of snowboarding with my dad. Feel closer to him in a place we created and shared precious memories together. Yet, when I snowboarded this time, I didn't feel anything. I just felt empty and numb. Like a dead man walking. Without a soul. Just an empty shell, completely dead inside."
"Langa..."
"I felt as if a part of me died with my dad. I hoped that if I did a risky jump, I'd feel alive again. Usually, challenging stunts or jumps aroused an extraordinary feeling within me, and I could hear my heart beating faster. Only this time, even that jump couldn't trigger any emotion in me. Nothing changed and...
"It scared you. That's why you lost control? Your balance?"
"Yes. It felt like falling into a black hole. I froze up in midair, and for a moment, I didn't pay attention to the board. I realized too late that my stance and the way I placed my weight on the board were utterly wrong, and at the angle, I was heading towards the ground, I'd crash. But it was too late to change directions or regain my balance."
"So you landed in the snow and injured yourself severely. That's what I felt when I shot up screaming in pain. Your pain was so intense it overcame the block."
"So, the crash had some good parts. At least the pain made me feel and proved I was still alive. And it broke through the block. I'd do that again if it brought me closer to you."
"Langa, that's not what I want. Please don't do something like that again. It scared the hell out of me. I was so worried." Tears ran down his cheeks and dropped onto Langa's face before he could stop them.
"Please don't cry, Reki. I'm sorry that I pulled you into my mess and endangered your life as well. I didn't know that my actions would also affect you since I lost the connection to you. But when I was lying there in the cold..."
Langa hesitated slightly, and Reki felt his uncertainty. He gently touched his shoulder and gave him what he hoped was an encouraging smile.
"Yes? Langa, please tell me."
"Maybe I was just hallucinating from lying there in the cold for some time, but I suddenly saw my dad in front of me. He told me I wasn't alone anymore. And reminded me that real courage meant admitting weakness and asking for help. Then, his appearance disappeared, and your warm smile flickered in front of my eyes. For me, you were life itself. You showed me what it meant to live. You're always so full of energy and enjoy life to the fullest. Your bond was always full of warmth and happiness. Remembering that warmth, I realized that I couldn't give up so easily. Not before I've met you in person. You gave me hope, and I found the strength to reach out to you. And I hoped that..."
„Yes? Go on."
"I wondered if you'd help me. Or even forgive me. I felt how your mood darkened before you blocked the bond. I didn't think too much about it because your emotions often change from happy to sad and back again. And I'm not as good as you are at understanding emotions or the reasons for them, so I probably contacted you too late. When I tried to reach out to you, I suddenly felt excruciating pain and screamed in agony. It felt like a part of my soul had been ripped out, and I had lost a part of myself."
"I'm so sorry, Langa. I didn't know that a block would cause you such tremendous suffering. I'll never forgive myself for that. I just overreacted. However, I've never thought even for one second that you were a nuisance. Quite the contrary, your quiet emotions always soothed me and healed me. My negative emotions always faded away with your help. You're like a cool lotion that helps heal my internal injuries—the bruises on my soul. So, there's nothing to forgive."
"I was so happy when I felt your presence again. It felt like the sun had broken through the darkness, and warmth and light had returned to my life. That's when I tried to gather all my remaining strength and reach you. You were my last glimmer of hope."
When Reki didn't say anything, feeling guilty about his selfish behavior, Langa smiled at him, to his surprise. There was no anger, resentment, or bitterness. Langa didn't hold a grudge or hold it against him. Instead, he saw understanding and compassion reflected in his soft eyes.
Langa placed his hand on his, and Reki felt the power of his genuine emotions and how much he meant to him. He doubted that Langa had sent these feelings to him on purpose; it was probably initiated subconsciously because his sense of happiness was so immense it flowed freely through the bond.
"I'm sorry, Langa. This is all my fault. If I hadn't blocked the bond to you, you wouldn't have done that. I abandoned you at a time when you desperately needed me. I'm so sorry, Langa. I swear I'll never do that again."
"Let's agree that we both overreacted and have done something we regret now. Let's start over?"
"Yes, I'd love that."
"Can you still tell me why exactly you blocked the bond? If I knew, maybe I could help you next time. Was it to protect yourself? Or maybe I'd done something wrong? You probably thought I was weird and dull because I'm always quiet and bad at showing emotions. You were probably disappointed in having me as a soulmate...
I didn't deserve someone as amazing as you as a soulmate. I assumed maybe you'd rejected me as a soulmate. I'm not worthy of a kind soul like yours whose bond is brimming with compassion and sympathy for others. When I compare myself to you, I feel completely selfish, cold, and heartless. I mean, all I cared about was snowboarding."
"No, you're wrong!" Reki exclaimed, slightly annoyed and too loudly. Langa's eyes widened while he stared at him in shock.
"Sorry, Langa. I shouldn't have shouted at you. You're not dull. I think you're fascinating. You're like a riddle I'd like to solve. You have a mysterious and cool aura, but you're also kind and warm-hearted. I felt it resonating through the bond. You often reached out to me when I was too hotheaded and about to lose my temper. You're quiet, but you always help me calm down when I'm too impulsive. I'm empathetic, which means I feel my and all emotions around me more strongly, so I overreact sometimes. The block was one of those times when I acted too rashly. I didn't know how to undo it again."
Langa just nodded, but his eyes were focused on him, so he knew he was listening.
"That's why I feel your emotions, too, even if you don't want me to. Like I'm feeling your pain right now. And you'll also feel my intense and overwhelming emotions, which can affect you, too. Feeling the emotions of your soulmate can be a good thing. You're terrible at expressing emotions, so if I feel them through the bond, it makes things easier for you. However, it can also have negative side effects. Negative emotions can startle you or shock you. You could freeze up, cry for no reason, or even faint if my emotions slam into you. With time, we learn to control our emotions better."
"You mean like a block?" Reki noticed how raw fear shot through the bond. He took Langa's hand and sent him some calm emotions to soothe him. After a moment, he relaxed again and nodded gratefully.
"No. Blocking means shutting someone out completely. You learned this the hard way. Controlling means you can shield yourself from my emotions if they hurt you. It won't harm me. Sometimes, if our emotions are intense, they affect our soulmates, too. If you learn to control the bond, you can shield yourself from my feelings, or you can control the bond, so your pain doesn't affect me. A bond is about finding a balance between us and helping each other out."
Pure relief resonated through the bond, and Reki felt the tension leaving his body.
Oh, that makes sense, I guess."
"I saw your snowboarding and looked up your tournaments. Your stunts were amazing! You were incredible! A true genius!"
Reki beamed at him excitedly, and Langa looked away in embarrassment. Reki smiled to himself. He had still seen the faint rosy blush in his pale cheeks. It was cute.
"And I always felt your happiness in those dreams. I loved those moments because those were the moments when I saw your smile more often. Your eyes sparkled like emeralds, and I wondered what I'd have to do to see or feel that smile more often."
"Reki, I – " Langa began, stunned by his honesty. Reki felt he wanted to say something, looking for the right words but drawing a blank. It was so endearing.
Then, his smile faded, and he looked down at the blanket, his fist clenching the blanket.
"But I thought I'm a nobody compared to you. You're handsome, cool, and talented. You headed for the Olympics. And I'm just an ordinary skateboarder who doesn't have any special talent. I thought that we weren't a good match because someone insignificant like me couldn't support you. I mean, what can I even do for you? I felt so useless and like a loser compared to a genius like you."
Langa looked at him like he was the biggest idiot on this planet.
"Are you completely insane? You've just saved my life, Reki. And you controlled a soul mate power successfully without even having mastered it. That's incredible. You're my hero!"
Reki stared at him, and he felt how his cheeks heat up, flushing bright red with embarrassment.
"Stop, Langa. I'm not a hero," he said, shielding his face with one arm, too embarrassed to look at him. Langa gently removed his arm and glared at him, his eyes stubbornly boring into him.
"I didn't say that! I said you're my hero. And you realize this is exactly what a hero would answer, right?"
"Langa... you're killing me."
"Reki, you should be more confident. You make your own skateboards, and I liked your designs. You're a talented mechanic, skateboard designer, and artist! And I loved your radiant smile when you skateboarded. It cheered me up and gave me the motivation to go on after... You were my hope. My sunshine. Until...
Until I blocked you...
~ ~ ~
Tears welled up in Langa's eyes, and he stubbornly wiped them away. This was his first time seeing Reki, so he didn't want to destroy the happy moment with his sadness.
Reki moved closer and gently wiped his tears away.
"Don't hide your tears from me, Langa. First, I can feel your pain and sorrow through the bond. And second, that is the reason for our soul bond's existence— to share our pain. Pain shared is pain halved. When Langa didn't look at him, Reki asked him something else.
"Your broken ribs are on the right side, right?"
"Yes, why?" Langa felt utterly lost. What did that have to do with anything?
"Does it hurt when you move?" When Langa stubbornly shook his head, Reki lay next to him on his side and motioned him to do the same.
'Liar!' he telepathically scolded him.
Langa pouted for a moment, but then, he felt how Reki hugged him, careful not to hurt him, his eyes watching him intently.
Langa flinched in surprise, not from the pain but the unexpected hug, copying him and putting his arms around him, hiding his head in his chest.
"I'm so sorry about your dad, Langa. If you need me, I'm here for you. Always."
Langa sobbed quietly into his chest, and Reki stroked his sky blue hair and massaged his back in circular motions to soothe him.
"It's ok to cry, Langa. I know you rarely show your emotions on the outside, but sometimes, it feels good to let them run free. It's liberating, and you'll feel better afterwards. I can practically hear your soul crying out in agony.
"I wanted to meet you. But I imagined our first meeting cheerful and not... like that."
"Yes, I didn't imagine meeting you in the Canadian mountains during a heavy snowstorm, either. But things rarely go the way we expect. What matters is that we did meet and are together now."
"Yes, you're right."
Reki's arms felt so warm, and he loved his scent. He also sensed their connection more clearly now and felt his compassion and worry.
"I - I miss him ... so much. I didn't have any friends, so I felt lost without him. He was everything to me," he admitted quietly.
"Of course, it's only natural. You loved your dad and spent a lot of time with him." When Langa stayed quiet, he asked him something else, changing the direction of the conversation a little.
"Tell me about your dad. What was he like?"
"Why?"
"Langa... I'm just curious. And I think talking about him will help you. You'll feel better. Do you trust me?"
"Yes, of course. My dad was kind, cheerful, and funny. We often spent time snowboarding because we both loved it. He also trained me, and when I became pretty good, he asked me if I wanted to participate in tournaments. It was fun. We both enjoyed it. I think my dad understood me even if I was quiet most of the time. We just didn't need words to understand each other. Snowboarding was our language, our way of communicating. I loved spending time with him. I was happy because I had him. I didn't need anyone else. But then..."
Reki pulled him closer and ran a hand through his hair.
"That must have been hard for you. And for your mom, too. I'm not saying it will be easy, Langa. But I hope you'll get better with time. You're not alone anymore. You have me now. I'll always be by your side. And don't forget your mom. She loves you and worries about you."
Langa hearing that he wasn't alone anymore made his final resolve shatter into a thousand little pieces. He suddenly burst into tears and broke down, crying into Reki's chest. He wanted to stop, but being in Reki's arms felt so cozy and safe. It felt right as if he belonged. In Reki's arms, he didn't feel embarrassed to cry, to show him his vulnerable side.
Reki just stroked his back and whispered some soothing words in his ear, trying to calm him down. Slowly, his tears ebbed down and turned into quiet sobs. Reki was right. It felt good to release his tears and let his feelings run wild. It felt like a layer of ice around his heart had been melted, and he could finally breathe for the first time since his dad's death.
"Thank you, Reki."
"It's fine. You look much better now, even if your cheeks are puffy and your eyes are bloodshot. However, there's still a tiny fragment you're hiding from me."
Langa's eyes widened in surprise. "How do you know that?"
"I tried to reach your side of the soul bond when you wouldn't wake up. I thought if I knew the cause of your pain, I could help you. But you suppressed a memory so that I couldn't access it. I drew back because I thought there would be a reason you suppressed it. Sometimes, your mind does that to protect you. Now, most of that barrier is gone, but a tiny layer still remains. Will you tell me about it?"
"If I tell you, you don't want to be my soulmate any longer. You'll realize what a horrible person I am and block the bond again." Tears ran down his face again, and he started trembling.
Reki just smiled at him and wiped his tears away, then removed some strands from his face.
"Langa, I promised you I would never do that again. I always keep my promises. And I saw your spirit dreams and can feel your emotions. I can guarantee you that you are a good and kind person. And no matter what you say next, that won't change."
"Even if I killed my dad?"
Reki flinched, and he wanted to pull out of the hug, to get away from him, anything not to see Reki's disgusted face. However, Reki didn't let go of him. His grip wasn't rough, but he had a firm hold on him, preventing him from pulling away.
"Langa, stop. I admit that this statement shocked me. Still, I'm convinced you're not responsible for your dad's death. Please tell me more. The whole story."
"I - I scolded my dad because we were nearly too late for the tournament. He missed the right turn, and we got lost and barely made it."
"Ok, that sounds pretty normal to me. Go on."
The encouraging look in Reki's eyes and the soft grip on his shoulder gave him the strength to continue.
"My dad apologized and promised me that we'd get our favorite food after my mom returned home to celebrate my victory. We watched some videos of the tournament and discussed some of the parts I could still improve. Then, after my mom had returned, we ordered our favorite food, and my dad went to pick it up." Reki nodded at him, signaling him that he was listening and to continue.
He had to take a road that was pretty curvy and narrow. On the way there, he got caught in heavy rain, and the road immediately turned to ice. We call it freezing rain. My dad lost his grip on the road and control over the car and drove down a slope."
"Wait, wait. Slow down. Are you saying that's when your dad died?" Reki's eyes widened in pure horror. Langa just nodded. He felt his whole body trembling and couldn't stop it. Reki moved closer and stroked his back to calm him down.
"I'm so sorry, Langa. Your mom told me your dad had an accident but not the details of what happened."
"You see? I killed him. If I hadn't insisted on ordering my favorite food, but we had cooked something together as my mom had suggested at first, he'd still be alive. My mom probably blames me, too. She's just too nice to tell me."
Tears ran down his face before he could stop them. But to his surprise, tears also ran down Reki's face. He noticed how deeply Reki shared his sadness. And he saw for the first time that his emotions really affected Reki as well. Reki wiped his tears away and looked into his eyes, his eyes glowing softly.
"Your mom would never blame you for that. She clearly loves you and worries about you a lot. She nearly lost you, too. And this wasn't your fault, Langa. You couldn't know what would happen. Or foresee the future. It was pure coincidence. So, you didn't kill your dad. It wasn't your fault. I think you need to hear that. And if you ask your mom, she'll tell you the same."
Langa quietly nodded and snuggled closer, his face buried in Reki's chest. He felt like the world's weight had fallen off his chest, and he could finally move again, feeling free and at peace with the world. Of course, his dad's death still weighed on him, but that wound would probably take more time to heal. Maybe with Reki's help, he'd be alright.
"Langa, have you talked to your mom about your dad? About his death? And your pain?" Langa shook his head.
My mom was so sad for a while. I didn't want to worry her even more.
"Langa, she's your mom. She'll always worry about you no matter what you do. But she'll worry less if you talk to her. I know communicating with others isn't your strong suit, but it would help her understand what you're feeling right now. With your poker face, it's hard for her to see what's on your mind or guess your feelings. Talk to her. Promise me."
When he didn't say anything for a moment, Reki sighed and stretched out his name endlessly.
"Laaaangaaaa..."
"Stop that, Reki! Fine, I promise I'll try."
"Great! Thanks for telling me the truth. I'm glad you don't hide your pain from me any longer."
"Yes, thanks, Reki. For everything. I'm feeling much better now.
"That's good. But I'm exhausted because I've shared your pain all the time. So, if the bond disappears again, don't panic. If I faint, the bond will disappear again. It will reappear if I regain consciousness."
"Wait, so when we reached the hospital, the bond disappeared because you were unconscious? You didn't block the bond to me again? I thought after all the pain I've caused you, you wanted to get rid of me again..."
"I'd never do that to you, Langa. I'll just need some rest, so the bond will probably stay. I'm only telling you this so you know there's no reason to be scared. Our bond can't be destroyed, by no one. It lasts infinitely."
"Infinitely. That sounds nice." He gently removed some of his red strands and kissed his forehead.
"I'm sorry I caused you pain. You look awfully pale. Sleep a bit."
Reki, however, had already closed his eyes, soundly asleep, with a smile dancing on his lips.
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The next chapter will be about Reki showing Langa Okinawa and teaching him more soulmate skills. And skateboarding, of course! But only as a bystander because Langa can't skate with broken ribs.