Panic was on the precipice, with the Normandy grounded. Liara prayed with every muscle spindle and fibre of her being that Sylvia had a plan, or at the very least has calmed down enough to start thinking of what they could do. They couldn't afford to give up now, no matter how foolish the Council was being.

But the Normandy wasn't the only one grounded.

Liara was cleared through C-Sec and a guard led her to one of the private cells, lips curling in a small sheepish smile when the engineer's gaze lifted to meet hers, however weary.

And, unfortunately, Sylvia also wasn't the only one grounded.

"Liara, get her out of here already!" Wrex hissed as he rushed up to the security glass. "I can't take her chattin' no more. I'm gonna kill her if she stays in here."

Sylvia rolled her eyes. "It'll teach you not to destroy Council property."

Wrex threw a sly smirk over his shoulder. "Looked like fun, what you started doing."

"Doesn't mean you should copy everything I do. I didn't command you to copy me, did I?"

Liara sighed and suppressed the urge to pinch the bridge of her nose, or collide her forehead with the cell's pane. "With Captain Anderson's assistance and some... Legal advice... I've assumed responsibility of your custody, and the Council has agreed to release you both to me so long as you promise not to destroy anything anymore. No charges pressed. No revocations. I've handled the finances and enlisted my status as a Prothean researcher to recruit you both to be on patrol and protect me during my next dig."

Now she was certain she had absolutely nothing left on her credit chit, or her name with how likely she was going to land herself in trouble for lying about the nature of her 'research team'.

"What's the difference?" Sylvia scoffed. "Everything is going to be destroyed as soon as Saren brings the Reapers in. What'll be left to research then?" She crossed her arms and fixated her glare at the floor. "We can't do anything. The Normandy's grounded, which means I still am even if I'm let out of here. And if I stole a shuttle, I wouldn't reach Ilos in time. I don't have any other ideas." Sylvia drilled her toes against the floor with a huff, her voice dropping lowly to drip with seething disapproval. "Ash died for nothing. We went off to do the Council's bidding on Virmire, and this is how we get paid for our sacrifices. We lose everything."

"We can't give up yet," Liara urged. She glanced over her shoulder, where a guard waited nearby as per protocol. She had to be careful with her words, unlike the Commander's blatant confession of going against the Council's ruling. Liara looked back at Sylvia and prayed the engineer would pick up on her true intention. "We've worked hard, let's visit the Flux again and just relax now, Syl. We've done our part. The Council will handle the rest now."

Goddess, it was as if she had slapped Sylvia with the way the engineer's jaw dropped so slowly and dramatically. Liara shifted her weight from leg to leg in anxiety, subtly, when Wrex looked like he was going to ask if she'd lost her mind.

"Let him ask. Please let it be the question that helps Sylvia figure it out then."

With no such luck, Liara wracked her brain for swift solutions before she shut the engineer down from any desire to listen anymore. Liara rested her hand against the pane and prayed to the Goddess that it would work, ignoring the way her cheeks began to flame from embarrassment as she begun to hum a familiar tune.

"What the hell are you doing?" Wrex balked bluntly. "Did you lose your head too? The Flux doesn't play shit like that."

At the very least, Sylvia's interest seemed to be captured, the thinking gears alight all over her face.

"I've been here the whole time singing you a song," Liara whispered meekly. "I will carry you."

Purposefully, Sylvia rose and strode to the pane. Her expression was unreadable, serious - uncharacteristic of her usual quirky charm that guaranteed some unorthodox social gaffe was well on the way. Her eyes flicked about, her piercing gaze enlightening nothing.

And then she suddenly beamed an easygoing smile.

"Get me out of here, pretty please," she cheerfully and nearly-lilted. Then her hand resided over her heart and she dramatically bent her head to the side, raising her voice for the guard to hear. "I've calmed down now, I promise I'll be on my best behaviour again. Council's poster girl - swear on my honour."

There was skepticism and Liara didn't need to turn to look at the guard to see it. She held steadfast onto a sympathetic smile for the confused krogan in the back of the cell, before she decided to take on the responsibility of being the mediating diplomat here. She internally crossed her fingers as she approached the guard, now praying that Sylvia wasn't going to change her mind as soon as her foot stepped out of that cell.

"As per the Council's request, they will be released in your custody for your research endeavours, then," the guard stated upon her approach. The turian could only be seen by his suspicious gaze, locked behind his helmet, which flicked briefly to Sylvia. He lowered his voice as he leaned towards Liara. "Are you sure you can handle those two?"

"I take full responsibility for their actions and if they misbehave, then I will keep to my promise to the Council and join them in solitary - perhaps then I will have a better chance at calming them down, if that comes to pass. But I am confident they've learned their lessons and will be grateful to have the Council's forgiveness, as well as a new mission for them to stay focused on."

The turian stared at her as if she was crazy, and perhaps she was. But she knew what was at stake here. Risks needed to be taken, because there was a far graver and more ominous danger that loomed on the horizon than being confined with aggrieved and restless companions.

"Give me a few minutes to process them, then," the guard relented. "Normally I'd have you wait outside for them, but I don't trust that krogan to behave as soon as I open the cell."

"I don't trust the human more than the krogan," Liara thought to herself in amusement. She nodded in understanding and claimed a corner to wait in anxious patience. Her eyes never left Sylvia, who shared the same sentiment - and it soon brewed self-conscious sheepishness in the asari as her interest panned to the ceiling or the floor instead.

Tense minutes later, and the human coolly walked up to her with a breezy smile. Hands were forcibly stuffed in pockets. The endearing restlessness was nowhere to be found, the penchant to buzz about like the flight of a biobee was entirely nonexistent. Even Wrex was put off by Sylvia's demeanour, and just being able to observe all of this was threatening Liara's discipline not to laugh at this painfully-obvious act. As soon as they were all cleared from C-Sec and on the precipice of hailing a cab, the act was demolished by a collective disgusted groan, shared by the human and krogan.

"I wanted to crush their coffee machine," Sylvia confessed.

"Coulda asked me," Wrex huffed, "I would've thrown a guard at it then."

"Can we please behave for two more seconds? We only just made it outside," Liara lamented with a sigh. Then she angled her head and smirked a little at Sylvia, which seemed to have instantly grappled the engineer's attention. "And we still have a galaxy to save."

"So you have a plan?" Sylvia had a rejuvenated spirit in her step again, her eyes alight with hope. "Like you actually have a plan, right?"

"I don't, personally, but Captain Anderson does. He's with Lieutenant Alenko in the Flux right now - which is where we're going to hear the plan."

There was a brief moment of tension, warring for control with that hope. Sylvia seemed to have pieced something else together, though, and she ushered Liara and Wrex into the cab with utmost haste. Her gaze flicked around the cabin before she elected to slide into the front of the cab. She input the destination and immediately turned in her chair to look back at Liara and Wrex.

"Whatever Anderson has in mind, that likely means going against the Council's order. That's going to be classified as treason and there will be severe consequences. I don't want to drag you two-"

Wrex started chuckling, low and rhythmic like a beating drum. He grinned easily. "I follow you because you're where all the fun's at, Shepard." A dismissive shrug. "And Saren has it coming to him, after Virmire. He's got 'severe consequences' coming his way. Don't care what the Council has to say for it. What's left for them to do to a krogan, anyways?"

Sylvia frowned a little, but even Liara knew there was no changing Wrex's mind, especially with his terrifying confrontation with the Commander on Virmire. The fact that those two shared a cell together without coming to trade blows - physically or verbally - over any unsolved grievances or distrust had to have meant something.

When it came to Liara's turn to have those eyes settle on her, she remained truthful, but faithful.

"I'm nervous, but I want to see this through," she resolved. She caught herself with a slight shake of the head. "I need to see this through - for mother, and for Ashley."

Sylvia sighed as she turned back front, her shoulders a little more square and stiff from what little the asari could see. There was a mutter, or two, a chant perhaps. Liara subtly leaned and strained to hear what the engineer was whispering under her breath - and her heart twisted painfully when she heard a piece of a poem, another friend's voice echoing the words in the depths of her memory.

"I am the master of my fate. I am the captain of my soul."

Tension filled the cabin, though unrecognized by Wrex with the way he seemed to chuckle lowly over whatever nefarious ideas he had running through his mind now. Liara's eyes slid out toward the window, until the cab interface caught the corner of her vision. She was too slow to see what Sylvia had done - perhaps checking the time and estimated time of arrival to Flux.

Though Liara wasn't entirely familiar with the Citadel, she swore that the Flux wasn't all that far away for the ride to be this long. She'd come from there herself, straight to get Sylvia out of lock-up, after Captain Anderson discussed what loophole they could take advantage of to secure release of the culprits sooner rather than later.

Then she spotted the hangars in the distance, before the cab dipped under and zipped into a tunnel.

"Where are we going?" Liara asked, leaning forward to grab the shoulder of the chair Sylvia sat in. She narrowed her eyes when the engineer shot a suddenly charming smile.

Very suspicious.

"What did you just do?"

"I'm dropping you two off so you can get back on the Normandy, a nice casual return," Sylvia replied just as innocently as her smile. She cut off the asari before any protests could be made. "You'll still be a part of the plan, I promise. Whatever the Captain has in mind, it has to involve freeing our bird. If we're going to be seen and get caught colluding with each other, the Council will be pissed and punish anybody they see in the vicinity of me and Anderson. This way, at the end of all of this, both of you can just say I've kidnapped you and forced you to work for me since you were already on the Normandy. The Council won't be able to punish you."

"What's the Council gonna do to me?" Wrex huffed. "Let them try-"

"This isn't a matter for debate," Sylvia interjected sternly. Her gaze cut into Liara's before the engineer turned to face front. "This is an order and that's final. Both of you will wait on the Normandy until further orders. If anyone asks, you're retrieving your belongings."

Liara bit back a sigh as she leaned back in her seat, knowing there was no fighting this. She couldn't very well dive to the front of the cab and change their trajectory to the Flux. She wouldn't put it past the stubborn Commander to refuse to see Anderson with her and Wrex in tow - and time was of the essence. The asari drew her thumb up into the tip of her teeth and scraped nervously.

"What the Council may or may not do will pale in comparison to what the Reapers will do," Liara mumbled. "I fear no punishment so long as we stop the Reapers."

"It's just sparing you from unnecessary punishment if you don't need to face it," the engineer sighed, and her tone took on a darker vibe. "Believe you me, there will be time enough for scape goats to be made of us all."

Casually return to the Normandy, she said. Retrieve belongings, she said. Pretend to be kidnapped.

"Syl, your plan isn't necessarily fool-proof if nearly everybody on the crew has the exact same story. The Council will not possibly believe that 3/4 of the crew has conveniently decided to 'casually return' to the Normandy to 'retrieve belongings' and, for some reason, be exactly at their stations at the time of their impending kidnapping."

Liara bit into the tip of her thumb a little harder as she herself took it in her own hands to wait in the cockpit with Joker, who'd given her many a confused side-eye as to why she was specifically here for her impending kidnapping.

"This is where Sylvia will come, 'kidnap' Joker and force him to get the Normandy in the air after it's unlocked. She will look me in the eyes or, so help me Goddess-"

"Do those flop around?" Joker inquired randomly, breaking Liara out of her muse. She followed the pilot's gaze seemingly aimed up at her crest, his sly smile a telling sign. She crossed her arms as her brow arched and he chuckled quietly, shrugging without a care as he turned back in his seat. He cracked his knuckles and cussed under his breath, something about a broken finger.

"Another strange human," Liara observed innocently. Her thoughts ceased and her lungs desisted to cooperate with her when she heard another telling sign: jovial footsteps.

Sylvia entered the cockpit as if she were on a mission, and one where she was, evidently, very smug about. Her smirk hailed obnoxious things, though the nervous glint in her eyes contradicted her entire body and demeanour. Her eyes met the asari's for a scant few seconds before they'd landed on Joker, saddling up beside him as she too crossed her arms.

"Be ready to take off as soon as we get the green light," the engineer murmured. She stole a hesitant look over her shoulder at Liara, giving a chaste and awkward wave. "You should be somewhere less obvious for a kidnapping, you know."

"Shall I get off the ship, as you once requested?" Liara teased boldly, her jaw aching in it's effort to suppress her smile.

"I can't kidnap with no hostages," Sylvia fired back sweetly, grinning. She looked back at the red lockdown light. Her shoulders tensed and grew as taut as her tone. "Last chance. There's no turning back if you stay on board."

"I'm certain everybody that's returned to the Normandy would not rather be anywhere else."

"All of us are behind you 100%, Commander," Joker injected. "Besides, I can't wait to see the dumb looks on the Council's faces and the dance they'll be doing in front of you next."

The reassurance seemed to ease the tension somewhat.

"They'll be dancing to dodge what I'll throw next if I have to hear another word from them," Sylvia grumbled. "Is retiring a thing for Spectres, you think?"

"If you count a permanent retire from life, then yeah," Joker drawled. "I'm sure they'll be happy to arrange that once they figure out what's actually happened here."

"They'll have to get in line." The engineer stiffened as the light turned green. "Get us to Ilos as soon as you can, Joker." She turned and briskly walked away. "Nothing will matter if we don't stop Saren."

"Where are you going?" Liara asked.

Sylvia tapped the frame as she exited the cockpit.

"To rehearse and record my 'informal' speech of how I've kidnapped the crew."

Out of all uncertainties in life, Sylvia had never been more certain and focused than now. She'd somewhat stitched the Starboard back together so that she had room to work on the projects dead set in her mind to be completed before planetfall. She carelessly swept the model ships off the table, carefully gathered the abandoned crumpled poems on the ground, and collected the pieces of the broken cork board.

Rules damned now that they were akin to pirates, she'd eschewed multiple safety protocols and had set up her guns on the table where she'd once painstakingly pieced together her model ships. She dismantled her gear, altered them in every way she could think of, every way that went against regulation.

"I need every edge I can get. Saren isn't going to play by the book. I should have done all of this sooner. Maybe Ash would still be alive."

A sharp breath. A slight sinking feeling dwelled in her chest. She ignored the ravenous thoughts desperate to devour her and shook her mind free, re-aligning her focus back onto her projects every time it strayed.

But then that sinking feeling turned into a tightening one, and panic began to brew as the realization of what they were doing sank in.

"I've never broken a rule in the Alliance. Mom will be heartbroken once she hears about all of this, and she won't be allowed to know why..." Sylvia chewed on the corner of her lip. "If we fail, she'll not know anything at all. What if we fail? What if Ash's sisters are the next ones to die in all of this clusterfuck of a mess?"

Slowly, one by one, the precariously stitched wound unravelled thread by thread, exposing her as her mind naturally took the path it favoured most: despair.

"Stop. I'm the Commander, Commander of the Normandy. We won't fail. I have faith in my team." A harsher chew of her lip, worrying it down until she could taste iron lace her tongue. "They've gotten me this far. I can do this. I can stop Saren. I can, right?"

She had the chance to in Virmire and she blew it. Literally, at that.

"Stop."

Whatever was in Sylvia's hands had slipped through and she barely had half a mind to set it down gently on the table. She crossed her arms and rested her head upon them, closing her eyes. She tensed when she heard the doors to the room open, and tensed even more when she recognized the footsteps. It was just another reminder of how much was riding on this all, and how many sacrifices were being made.

"Research endeavour." Sylvia scoffed within the relative safe confines of her mind. "Liara's casting away the integrity of her name as a scientist. Her doctoral was reduced to nothing the second we took off with the Normandy. Even if technically and legally she's safe, it doesn't mean her reputation's unscathed. That's thanks to me too. I'm doing a wonderful job at this Commander thing."

Every footstep brought with it harsher thoughts as she sentenced herself to mental punishment. She nearly blurted for Liara to go away, and that temptation grew when a hand tentatively rested between her shoulder blades.

"Haven't I done enough to you?"

Circles were rubbed, ones that recruited her tongue into a world of pain as she bit hard to cut off the words.

"What compels you to come to me, now that you've seen the worst of me? I can't imagine it was a charming sight to see me lose my shit at the Council and insult their lack of intelligence. needs to be prescribing them Vitamin IQ, stat."

A chair scraped noisily as it was brought up beside her, and she listened intently to the hushes of movement, of clothes bending and stretching, of feet touching hers beneath the table. Then she felt something pointy touch the tip of her elbow, and there was a sense of finality that followed with a sigh. Sylvia angled her head as inconspicuously as possible to steal a quick peek, confused to see that Liara was copying her with a head face down on the table. The engineer retreated back into the vicious prison of her thoughts.

"She's tired too. Hopeless, likely. I need to be a Commander for her too, offer guidance, offer that hope. But..."

Sylvia sucked in the corner of her lip, burying her head back into the darkness of her arms.

"How can I offer what I don't have, what I don't know? There are no guarantees we'll reach Saren in time. No guarantees we'll stop him. No guarantees we'll make it out alive - or anyone in this universe, for that matter. I can't very well gush all this out though. I have to be the anchor in the storm, and whatever other commander bullshit there is. There should be a manual for this, somewhere."

Liara's chair scraped noisily again. The legs saddled up right beside the engineer's seat, clinking loudly. She raised her head a little, watching out of curiosity as she tried to demystify what in the universe was happening. Her chest tightened even more when Liara remained committed to keeping her head down, but her leg was pressed more firmly against Sylvia's - from the knee, right down to their ankles.

There was no stopping the goofy smile that cracked the corner of Sylvia's despondent lips. She leaned down and pressed them to the tip of Liara's elbow, waiting patiently until that blue head raised as curious eyes inspected what she was doing. The engineer's smile grew even more when their gaze levelled on the other, despite the weight of worry clouding them.

"Hey you," Sylvia whispered hoarsely. "Come here often?"

Liara chuckled, the soft melody skipping in tune with a heart. "I suppose you could say that." She adjusted herself and sat up a little, but only to reciprocate as she too kissed the elbow, the tips of their noses nearly brushing. "How are you feeling, Syl? Are you okay?" The asari's eyes betrayed her when they glanced across the recent projects, her lips pursing in a frown of concern. "These don't seem to be your usual... Recreational ideas."

"They're not." Sylvia avoided the worried look that settled back on her, dumping her head in her arms again. She sighed and muffled into the table. "Illegal modifications - need every edge I can get to stop Saren. Not like it's a big deal to break more laws if I'm committing treason against the Council and stealing an Alliance ship, right?"

"They won't care once they see what we've stopped," Liara whispered. "They can't. They have to realize that the alternative would mean-"

"I'll be punished. I have to be. Even if I 'save the galaxy'," Sylvia shrugged with a huff. "They're not exactly going to admit they were wrong and broadcast to everybody about the truth behind the Reapers. It'll cause mass panic. I've disobeyed a direct order and on top of that, I've stolen property as well as taken the crew 'hostage'. I'll need to be made an example of so that nobody else gets ideas like me."

"But surely they won't be so harsh in their penalties?"

"Honestly?" Sylvia rose her head and rested her chin on her palm, her shoulder rising and falling in another lame shrug. "They've ignored me and dismissed my warnings for this long, chalking up everything to the geth and Saren manipulating them. The Council isn't going to listen to me even with a Reaper breathing right in their face. My only regret is that I did not think to record Sovereign speaking to me at Virmire, footage like that would've at least made a dent in their make-believe stories." Her forehead connected with the table in a resounding and painful thud. "Note to self, install helmet and body cams in the future, if we survive that long to see it..."

A gentle pressure wrapped around the tip of her elbow, warm breaths sinking in through her hoodie. Liara exhaled slowly.

"About that... That is why I've come here."

Sylvia tilted her head enough to peek through a side-glance, muffling almost incoherently. "You want a helmet cam too? I suppose it'd be prudent to equip the crew wi-"

"No, not that," the asari chuckled gently. Her nose faintly flushed as her eyes glazed shyly. "I... In case if we're too late, I want..." She suddenly turned her head in and hid her face against the table, making for an amused sight with everything squished on the cold metal. A nervous laugh followed a shaky breath. "I was hoping to... Well... I wanted us to express our feelings, you see..."

That certainly piqued the engineer's interest, and her head shot up with a fire ignited in her veins, a raspy burn nestled in her throat.

"About Saren? I have plenty to say about that fucking-"

"No! Not that either," Liara's jittery laughter became painfully obvious, as did the darkening colour of her complexion. She pulled Sylvia's hands into her own and steadied herself with a breath, only to hold it. She smiled meekly when the words rushed out in a frail whisper.

"About us, Syl."

"Oh." Sylvia was drawing a blank, ignoring the alarms sounding off in her head. She had a dreadful feeling pooling in her stomach. "I'm not really catching on to something here, but Liara doesn't seem like she has bad news for me. I think. I hope." She looked down at their hands, where a pleasing tingle coursed down the veins that were traced, and that dread exploded tenfold with the inkling of where this could be heading. Her mouth slackened as if she'd inhaled an entire nightclub's stock of alcohol.

"...Oh."

Sylvia was distracted by the clammy hands clasped over her knuckles, an anxious thumb pacing back and forth over the bone that jutted out on the side of her wrist. She watched as a game of tetris unfolded within her mind, pieces of the puzzle frantically trying to fit itself together before the time ran out. Her mouth wasn't quite coordinated with her brain just yet.

"I mean, I still have plenty to say there too," she mumbled absentmindedly. Her heart sank a little with the rest that languidly tumbled out without thought. "But I don't have someone to tell me 'no' and stop me from my bad ideas."

Low laughter sparked a small smile from her, which turned into a goofy grin when Liara seemed more confident than ever before - a promising sign with her reassurance.

"You've never had a bad idea. None that I'd consider as such, anyways."

"I mean, you did say my dinosaur sounds are soothing, so I dunno if you're the right person to make that call."

"On the contrary, I am the recipient of such calls, so would that not make me the perfect person?"

This was most definitely heading in the direction of soon inventing the next level 10 emergency bailout. In a single sentence, so much was provoked to race through Sylvia's mind, yet she was disarmed of saying the words. She was compelled to lean back when Liara inched closer, and soon it seemed to be yet another amusing game for the asari when they'd played a bit of cat and mouse. Liara's palm skidded along the jawline and gently held the engineer in place as she laid an innocent kiss on the cheek, lingering, warm breaths seeping into skin as her lips glided over to the corner of Sylvia's mouth.

"We may already be too late," Liara whispered tentatively. Her eyes fluttered shut with a shaky sigh. "I want to show you how I feel."

"Y-you are," Sylvia chuckled, "Believe me, you are. You have already, in fact! Many, many, uh, numerous times. You know? You-"

"Sylvia."

One simple word, and all the air may as well have been squeezed right out of the poor engineer's lungs. She laughed again, her nervousness far more apparent, and she had to embark on a new mental mantra not to cringe at herself for her false charms and bravado.

"Is it too late to start dating through the drone?" Sylvia suggested pitifully, catching on quick to the hurt that struck Liara when the asari opened her eyes and leaned back in her recoil. "I-it's just that, you know? Uh, I, just... I haven't..." The words weren't coming out, cramming up inside her mind instead. The hand that clasped over hers began to trace paths on her veins again, coaxing the absolute worst out of her.

The unfiltered truth.

"You have, you know, you have so much to work with. I dunno what to do with you - I haven't watched nearly enough porn to have any idea what I'm supposed to do with a porn star, you know? I mean, math is my porn, pretty much. And you're - I mean I don't mean it offensively, of course - but you're a... You're an alien. I-I mean to me! I haven't bought any fornax magazines. I felt like that'd be cheating, you know? So... Sooooooooooooooo... Therefore, in conclusion of this thesis, it'd be safest to do this through the drone."

Somewhere in the confined rational part of her mind, a poor tiny voice was screaming at her to shut up. She almost believed a part of Ashley was living on inside of her.

Liara's brow arched excruciatingly slow that it was as if time itself was screeching to a halt. The asari's expression held too much to interpret, and yet somehow nothing at all with how blank it was. Her wide stare made it impossible to deem anything good was going to come of this, and when her mouth opened, Sylvia had half a mind to cover it with her hand to spare herself the inevitable heart break of them breaking up now.

"I... After all this time..." Liara breathed incredulously, and suddenly she deflated with a humble chuckle as her head fell. "I still do not know what to say to that." Her meek smile rose with her eyes, which seemed to dance despite the colouring of her cheeks. "I am sorry, Syl, I did not mean to pressure you so. But I must know: has what happened between us in the showers... Do you think me promiscuous, or..." Her head bopped side to side as she seemed to be disarmed of words herself. Her complexion darkened a touch more as she hesitantly whispered. "Talented in that regard?"

"Have you actually taken a look in a mirror, like ever in your life?" Sylvia blurted. "You have to be with-"

Fortunately, a finger on her lips stopped her in her tracks. Liara humbly shook her head.

Unfortunately, with the gears clogged, it wasn't a clarifying answer for the engineer having quite possibly the most awkward breakdown of her life.

"You've seriously never taken a look in a mirror?"

Melodic laughter graced the small room, and instead of that heavenly clarifying answer, Liara pulled on Sylvia's hand to climb out of their seats and head towards the couch instead. There were nervous stops on the way, and wordless reassurances given along with a slight tug on hooked fingertips. Anxiety came back with a vengeance when an invisible force suddenly pushed Sylvia down by her shoulders and firmly pressed her rear on the couch. Her chest tightened when the asari plopped down beside her, leaning over to rest on Sylvia's arm.

Calloused fingers weaved between the engineer's and pulled her hand into a lap. It took time and silence until it was evident nothing was going to happen between them, and she could breathe again. Her gaze came back into focus, the world could make sense again. Instead she had the poem scrawled on the glass pane to glare at her, and her heart was taken on another rollercoaster ride that made it plummet to her stomach. She squeezed Liara's hand and closed her eyes with her breath stuttering out of her. The way her hand was squeezed in return made her waver, for a moment, questioning their chances of beating Saren.

Laughter somehow found a crack to squeeze through in all this insanity.

"Just to be clear, I do not actually want to start m-my... Pornographic empire by romancing your drone," Liara jested timidly. "I am more than okay to wait, Sylvia. I do not want to pressure you or make you feel like you need to hide with me, but I must admit it is an experience I am looking forward to with you."

"Even after everything I've said?" Sylvia balked in disbelief, scoffing derisively at herself. "I don't know if there's something wrong with me or with you to still want to be with me."

"I'll take that as a compliment," Liara chuckled lowly.

A wicked smirk tugged along and Sylvia found courage to finally meet the asari's eyes. "Yeah, definitely something wrong with you."

Lips claimed their opportunity as Liara leaned up to kiss, and something threatened to ignite as a calloused palm traced the curve of Sylvia's jaw. That dreadful feeling in her stomach knotted, but it peculiarly... Wasn't dreadful anymore.

"You know something?" Sylvia whispered in between breaks of their kisses. She drew one of Liara's hands up and pressed it firmly against her chest, smiling blissfully against the lips that stayed steady against hers.

What once was a moment she wished she could hide and die from had somehow, along the way, become something to be comfortable with in that she could be true to herself.

"I think you're not awful. Like really not awful."

The way those lips cracked wider against hers meant more to her than perhaps Liara would ever know, a tell-tale sign that even their worst moments weren't forgotten.

"Not sure if I should actually be relieved that she's got such a good memory," Sylvia mused in silent amusement. "That'll definitely be my downfall someday."

"Have I become the 'sweatpants' of your life now, Sylvia?"

"Mm hm." Sylvia pressed a little firm, twisting in her seat as she drew one of her knees up on the couch. She framed the asari's face, planted random butterfly kisses until she drew a giggle, then peered deep in Liara's eyes. Before there was a chance to joke and reminisce about asking Liara to get off the ship, Sylvia was outdone by the clever smirk murmuring against her mouth.

"Ugh, the Commander's so cool. I should hang out with her more."

That made a wide grin burst from the engineer, and she rose up on her knees as she hovered over Liara, compulsion leading the way.

"Listen here, you..." Sylvia chuckled, but she couldn't think of a remarkable comeback. Her brain was immediately shutdown when hands wove around her shoulders and pulled her down for another kiss. When a hand shyly skirted underneath her hoodie, and nails accidentally skimmed against her skin in a hasty retreat, the thing that threatened to ignite before had begun to boil her very blood. She became aggressive, or perhaps more desperate, seeking and thriving off the earnest connection she shared with this remarkable being that was so patient, so kind, so understanding and inquisitive and intelligent and-

"You're more beautiful than pizza," Sylvia blurted, no longer caring or cringing with whatever dumb shit fell out of her mouth now.

And then a most wholesome - wholesome to her - realization had struck.

"You literally make me the dumbest person alive and I love it."

All Liara did was chuckle, growing more impassioned with every little thing that tumbled out, and it was beginning to harbour concern as well as to how such a person could tolerate such awkward stupidity. Surely she did appreciate intelligence in a partner, correct? Or perhaps she enjoyed being the cause that she could affect someone to this degree.

"Wait, what if it's a sinister and malicious-"

Sylvia straightened her arms and kept a poor confused asari at arm's length, whilst her head fell back in a pitiful drawl. "No... Why is this happening now? I was doing so good and-"

"I apologize for pitting you against your brain once again," Liara hummed with amusement, having already some secret idea of what was happening despite the lack of clarity. "Perhaps we should stop, especially if you do not feel ready. I would not want you to regret anything."

Eyebrows pinched in a silent heartbroken sob as the asari readily climbed out from underneath, clearly possessing far more composure of the two as she had walked over to the chair that Sylvia used to obsessively glance over in what she once thought was just a one-sided interest. And then she was proven wrong, like so many things, but she still felt lost in this all. It tugged in the far reaches of her mind when her first instinct was to find Ash and talk, brainstorm aloud and attempt to personify the chaos of her feelings in order to understand them. Her throat tightened and she couldn't help but feel as if there was some kind of lingering disappointment here, despite the asari's good-natured ways and best attempt to try and hide it.

"Why would I doubt her, when she's been nothing but good to me? She's still understanding me, even now."

Sylvia nibbled on the inside of her lip as she forced her gaze on the poem on the pane, trying to ignore the languid way Liara had nestled in her chair and drew a datapad in her lap - a distraction from the disappointment, perhaps.

"I don't understand this, don't understand me." Sylvia chewed a little harder. "I'm supposed to be a leader. To be bold - but I don't want to disappoint her in my fumbling, my hesitance with... Everything, really. I need to stay focused on the mission. I can't tell her my concerns, and my stupid brain will be stupid again at the worst times because of it, if I think of something. So isn't this way better?"

It didn't feel that way, and that made itself very apparent.

"Why is this so complicated?"

Did it have to be? Was it really so bad if Liara knew what kinds of concerns she had?

"Sometimes it's hard to not be 'the Commander' around her. But do I have to be?"

Head fallen into hands, Sylvia groaned quietly as she curled her fingertips in against her scalp.

"I'm sorry, Liara... I just... I want to, but I'm..." She sucked in the corner of her lip and bit hard to stop herself. She could feel eyes on her, could feel some kind of... Silent cry, or something. An invisible hand, a spectral reach. She dug her fingers in harder until pain diffused along her head. Her bravado crumbled in the harrowing face of the truth that ate away at her the longer she held up this false front.

"Honestly, I don't want to admit it but I'm scared. I can't tell anyone that though because then how the hell do I help anyone fight past their fear so that we can stop Saren? I'm the Commander, I have to be strong and fearless, but I'm just scared shitless here. I don't want to be too late. I don't want this between us to be spoiled and pushed because of Saren - he's already destroyed so much, and I don't want... I don't want our first time to be because of him."

Anger threatened to overtake her as bitter venom seethed and bit her tongue.

"He took Ash away from me and I don't want him to take you too. I don't want to lose anyone anymore. I don't want to fail anyone, I don't want to disappoint anyone, especially you, or mom, or Captain Anderson or... I just... I don't want-"

Quiet footsteps accompanied a shadow that fell over her. Gentle hands coaxed hers away from her scalp and wrapped around her head, embracing and nestling against the asari's stomach.

"He will not take anyone anymore," Liara stated with the confidence the engineer wished she had - knew she was supposed to have and foster as the Commander.

But perhaps the source of that confidence needn't necessarily come from one leader.

"I know that because you're our Commander - Commander of the Normandy. You heard Joker: we're 100% behind you. It's okay to be scared, it is natural. We all are... But we are able to fight those fears because we are all witnesses to you moving forward, always thinking of solutions to whatever problem dares come our way, no matter how frightening or dangerous. I believe in you because I have been witness to how you think, and you are always striving for the best solution. But... Sometimes that is also at the expense of faith in yourself and your solutions. I wish I knew what to do or say to change that - so I can only hope that, one day, you will see yourself the way that I see you with my eyes. But there is one thing that I do know, now."

Liara cupped Sylvia's chin and encouraged her to raise her head with a guiding pull.

"I know we won't fail. We have faith in you. You've gotten us this far and we will stop Saren."