The carriage ride was as awkward as it was nerve wracking. The two men hardly spoke to one another for the entire trip. They simply sat there, hand in hand, staring out the window, watching their time together dwindle with every passing kilometer. Severus' hand held Harry's as tightly as Harry's held his. Their palms were sweaty against each other, but neither pulled away to wipe them dry.
Before long, the two could see Hogwarts approaching in the distance. They finally looked at each other. Harry could practically hear Severus' mind reeling, but couldn't tell what the thoughts going through his head were. He was too scared to ask. Breaking the silence felt like shattering a glass window that kept him safe from hurt. This silence, though, was deafening. He hated it. Finally, Snape spoke up.
"I suppose it will be nice to see your friends again." It was clear he was only trying to fill the silence.
"Mm," Harry responded, nodding his head slightly. "And I imagine you will have a lot to get caught up on with work." He too didn't mind trying to fill the silence.
"It's true," Severus said. "I have no idea who has been filling in for my classes. I imagine everything's been left a mess." He looked down at his lap. "In other circumstances you would traditionally have work to make up in my class." Harry looked over and saw sweat beading on his forehead.
"That's fine," Harry said. "I can catch up. You'll just need to tell me what I need to do."
"I think that, due to our circumstances, I will just mark your work as complete. We ought to limit the time you spend in my classroom after class is over." Severus was once again avoiding eye contact with Harry.
"If that's what you're most comfortable with," Harry responded. The comment ended the conversation and left them both in silence once more.
After a few more minutes, as the two rapidly approached Hogwarts, Harry looked over at Severus again. He couldn't see much of his face as the other man looked out the carriage window, but Harry could see a single tear rolling down Snape's cheek. It left a thin, wet trail behind it. Harry pulled his hand away from the other man's and gently wiped the tear away. He leaned over and gently laid a kiss where the tear had fallen before turning back to face ahead. Neither acknowledged the gentleness of the moment nor did they speak of how it would be last time Harry kissed Severus.
Minutes later, the carriage arrived at the gate, and the two men got out to collect their things. Hardly anyone was outside the castle. The sky had an eerie greyish blue cast, and it seemed it might rain. Harry thought to himself how fitting it would be for it to storm that night.
Severus lifted Harry's trunk from the back of the carriage before grabbing his own. The carriage began to leave on its own almost instantly. Once they'd collected their trunks, they looked at one another. Neither quite sure what to say. Harry's face felt hot.
"Well, Mr. Potter, thank you for accompanying me on this trip," Severus said, offering a small smile. "I truly enjoyed our time together. I hope you found it as pleasant as I did." The cordiality stung, but Severus wasn't trying to be rude or smug.
"Thank you for inviting me, professor," Harry responded. "I'm glad to hear you enjoyed your time." Severus reached out a hand to shake Harry's, but Harry turned away and headed inside the castle. "Have a good night," he said.
Severus retracted his arm and watched Harry enter the building. He followed soon after, making his way to his own chambers. The halls were rather quiet as most students were at dinner. Severus' footsteps echoed quietly down the corridor.
A first year Slytherin was returning to her dormitory as Severus approached the Slytherin door. When she saw the professor, her eyes lit up and she smiled brightly at him.
"Welcome back, professor! We've missed you. Did you enjoy your trip?" She asked.
Snape looked down at her. "Thank you, Miss Carter. The convocation was very nice. It is good to be back at Hogwarts, though." He'd never tell anyone, but he loved the first year students. They were dreadfully impossible to work with, and always needed help in class, but they were always the most eager of his students.
The first year ran into the Slytherin commons as the door opened. Severus walked into his quarters, shutting and locking the door behind him immediately. He set his trunk down near the foot of his bed. As he leaned down to begin sorting through the trunk, he caught sight of the book Harry kept under his side of the bed. He turned his head away and tried not to think about it.
Instead, he began sorting through the things in his trunk, tossing aside what needed to be washed, and refolding what needed to be put away. He hung his dress shirts and cloaks in his wardrobe, neatly folded his socks, and opened the drawer for his undergarments. He moved a few of his undergarments aside to make room.
In doing so, however, Snape found a piece of parchment stuck to the bottom of the drawer. He peeled it up. The ink was a bit smudged, but the lettering was easy enough to make out.
"I love you - H." That was all that was written. Harry had left the note when Severus was in class one day, not knowing when his professor would see it, but wanting to leave something sweet for him later. Severus had no clue that it was there until that very moment.
Severus felt frozen in time. He could feel tears starting to well up in his eyes. He dropped the note on the floor and wiped at his eyes; a feeble attempt to remedy the situation, as the tears were already flowing faster than he could wipe them away. His teeth were clenched and he found himself overcome with emotion; anger leading them. He felt a pang in his chest, and his head felt as if it was about to explode.
"Fuck!" He yelled, slamming his fist against the wall. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He continued to yell, punching the bricks of the wall harder and harder with each word. After a few seconds, he stopped yelling and turned to slide down the wall. He put his head in hands and continued to sob, a slow stream of blood dripping down his right hand from his now busted knuckles.