I was woken up by what was undoubtedly a woman's foot nudging against my ribs. I shifted my breton cap away from my eyes that I was using to cover my face before I fell asleep, spotting Elesa looking down at me from above.
"Please don't tell me you've been lying down here all day."
"What time is it?" I yawned and sat up as my pokemon also began to stir and stretch themselves. The sky had turned incredibly dark, so I must have slept for quite a long while.
"It's almost nine," Elesa frowned. "I'm sure I gave you the key, so why are you sleeping outside like a homeless man?"
"Ask Grumpy."
"Grumpy?"
"That little grumpy devil over there," I pointed to the pikachu standing guard at the front of her door on her front porch who was still glaring daggers at me. Had he been doing that the entire time? That's some serious dedication.
"You got locked out because of a pikachu? You expect me to believe that?"
"But isn't that the truth?"
"Stop shitting me. You can easily handle any pikachu."
"You said to not cause you any trouble."
Elesa looked like she was about to say something, but sighed and held her tongue in the end. She passed over to me the huge paper bag she had been holding, walked up to the front porch and bent down to carry Grumpy in her arms, patting its back and murmuring something into its ears as if coaxing it while unlocking her front door.
"Come in," she called out as I recalled hydreigon and drapion back into their pokeballs, the only two pokemon that cannot fit within her house, before entering it.
"Like it? I'm saying this upfront, you owe me one for this," I smirked when I saw how her jaws dropped at seeing her house so spick and span.
"You spent the whole day… doing spring cleaning?"
"That didn't take very long. Most of my day was spent being subjected to suffering the cold treatment of mother nature thanks to a little grumpy pikachu," I replied as I poked at the forehead of said pikachu being carried in Elesa's arms, who growled and attempted to bite at my finger and failed when I moved it out of the way in time.
"See? Grumpy pikachu."
"Stop bullying him, he already has enough on his plate as it is," Elesa shifted her body so that she was between me and Grumpy, preventing us from continuing to provoke each other. "Anyway, thanks for the spring cleaning, I really appreciate it. And oh, I knew you brought nothing over, so I also took the liberty to pick out some clothes for you to change into during your stay here. It should have everything you might need, but let me know if you need anything else."
I looked into the large paper bag. Despite how messy her house was, I can tell that there is a meticulous side to her too seeing that she had indeed considered everything that I might need while I am staying at her place. She had bought clothes for me to wear for almost all kinds of occasions, including other stuff like underwear and even packed in essentials like a toothbrush, shaver, shaving cream, and so forth.
"That's considerate of you."
"Unlike someone, I can be nice when people are nice to me," Elesa said sarcastically with a dry tone as she put down the pikachu in her arms. "Have you had dinner?"
"Nope."
"Good, me neither. I will go take a shower and get changed, you help prepare the ingredients in the meantime," she told me as she started to head up the stairs, but stopped to add in another line before doing so.
"You just have to prepare the ingredients. Don't you dare do the cooking, I will do it."
"Do you really have to do this?"
"I heard it all from Iris. Your cooking? No taste, super sweet, or super salty. My answer to all three? No, no, and no. If there is still a heart within you I implore you to spare me from that kind of torture. If your pokemon are hungry, get pikachu to show you where I keep their food, but please feed your bigger mons outside."
She disappeared up the stairs after finishing saying her piece.
"You heard her, is anyone hungry?" I asked and received a collective negative from my pokemon. Seeing that they had made themselves comfortable in the living room and were starting to laze around, I strode into the kitchen and opened the fridge to check what's inside. As expected, it's incredibly messy. On the bright side, it's well-stocked.
"This, this, maybe this too..."
I began to pick out what I think could be used to cook a simple meal for two, wash the ingredients that need to be washed, and began preparing them.
"Aren't you tired of staring at me the entire day?" I asked Grumpy without looking at it, who was now perching itself on the counter just slightly over an arm's length away from where I am slicing up the cabbage on the chopping board, its face still etched with a grumpy expression befitting of the nickname I so graciously bestowed upon it in my moment of genius.
I offered a piece of sliced cabbage to the pikachu, who was still staring at me as though it would fight me in a deathmatch with nothing but its little fists if I so much as looked at it the wrong way.
"Just give me a yes or a no, my arm's getting a little sore here."
Grumpy warily stared at the piece of sliced cabbage I offered for a few seconds before looking back at me. Its gaze alternated between the sliced cabbage and my face for a short moment before it cautiously nibbled on the cabbage. Once it was sure that the cabbage was not poisoned or anything, Grumpy wasted no time in snatching it away from my hands before scurrying away to a safe distance to proceed with nibbling on the cabbage. Throughout the entire time, it was still glaring at me with that same grumpy face. It's less grumpy than before, but still grumpy enough.
By now, I have formulated my own suspicions regarding this pikachu based on what I know about its species and what I observed about Grumpy. I resumed preparing the ingredients.
"Hey Grumpy, want to see some magic?"
Grumpy let out a dismissive grunt, still nibbling away on the cabbage.
"I can read your history. Don't believe me? How about this, you were an abandoned pokemon until Elesa found you, am I right?"
There was a loud and threatening growl emitted from Grumpy, so loud that umbreon had immediately dashed inside the kitchen and placed himself between me and the pikachu, hairs raised and growling back at it with equal ferocity. I stroked umbreon's back, signalling to him that it is okay to relax.
"Your species as a whole are generally jolly in nature. I had never seen such a disagreeable and grumpy pikachu in my entire life and I am someone who had seen the worst that can happen to a pokemon and I had seen how such things can affect them. This meant that something so bad and traumatising must have happened to you for you to turn out this way, correct?"
Grumpy's growl had decreased slightly in volume, but still audible nonetheless.
"You heavily favour your right side over your left, which suggests you are still suffering from an injury that you haven't healed from. I'm betting that this is an injury that cannot be so easily healed, or maybe unable to be healed at all. Right so far?"
I placed the chopped cabbages into a separate bowl and took out the tomatoes. I started working on slicing them without delay.
"I found it odd that your electricity output is lower than that of a pichu. I have no idea as to why, but I think I can make a guess when I finally saw the scars on your cheeks up close after we entered the house. It's faint, but there. Pikachus produce electricity using two special sacs located underneath their cheeks. That organ of yours is damaged, isn't it? From the looks of those scars, it was deliberately damaged, so much that it doesn't look like an injury you suffered from an accident in a battle gone wrong. I'd go so far as to say that you were mistreated by your previous owner. Tortured, even. Hit all the main points so far?"
I took a slice of tomato, turned around, before walking up to Grumpy and offering the small slice of tomato sitting on my outstretched palm.
"Believe it or not, I recognise the signs of trauma both in humans and pokemon. Have to have been there to be able to know them. Like you, I don't easily place my trust in others too. So, trust me when I say that I'm going to respect your privacy and not pry into your personal history. It's not like I can understand whatever you are growling at me anyway. I can understand your distrust towards humans if what I guessed was indeed what you had been through, but trust me when I say that I mean you no harm. Look at it this way, if I really wanted to enter through the door, did I really have to camp outside the entire day the moment you didn't allow us to take a single step forward? Look at umbreon, look at my pokemon, do we really have to do that when we are clearly so much stronger?"
The wariness in Grumpy's eyes did not lessen, but at least it isn't growling at me anymore.
"I don't mind you glaring at me the entire time that I will be staying here because you have the right to be cautious of me, but do try to not inconvenience me if possible. Here, it's nothing much, but take it as a token of goodwill," I gestured to Grumpy to accept the small slice of tomato. Grumpy continued staring at me cautiously for a good few seconds but accepted the offering in the end. This time, it didn't scurry away as it did the first time.
"Nice meeting you, bud," I ruffled the top of Grumpy's head, only to quickly retract my hand with a hiss when I felt the sting of electricity. Grumpy grinned at me with an evil smirk, clearly celebrating the fact that it had finally managed to electrocute me.
"You little asshole. You wound me, and here I thought we were having a moment."
Grumpy looked rather smug at his little victory as it turned around and showed its back to me, deciding to focus on nibbling at the tomato slice instead of giving me the time of the day. This was probably the best outcome I could arrive at. For Grumpy to be able to show its back to me would mean that I had gained some semblance of trust from that grumpy little prick.
That little shock from earlier still stung though. Grumpy little asshole.
"What happened between the both of you while I was showering?"
Elesa finally asked the million dollar question halfway into our meal, alternating her gaze between me and Grumpy. Grumpy was sitting on the table surface right next to Elesa's seat, still glowering at me but there's already a big improvement in his attitude from before.
"I offered it the chance to make friends, the little prick replied with an electric shock," I answered while taking a sip out of the cabbage soup Elesa had cooked. Tastes like plain water to me.
"Pikachu's a he," Elesa informed me as she took a bite out of the omelette she cooked. "Speaking of which, interested in adopting him?"
In a show of unexpected teamwork, I slowly turned my head towards Grumpy as Grumpy did the same for me. We exchanged a stare of equal intensity that clearly conveyed the same message: Don't even think about it or I will kill you.
Elesa continued to speak while eating her meal as if she didn't see the obvious exchange of stares between Grumpy and I.
"Pikachu usually stays within the enclosure, no idea why he ran out today. A lot of the pokemon in the enclosure are actually abandoned electric type pokemon that I picked up or found their way to me somehow. Pikachu's one of them."
I wiggled my eyebrows at Grumpy, telling him that "See? I was right."
Grumpy attempted another shock, only for umbreon to lazily slap the erratic weak sparks away with a paw from where he was also resting on the tabletop. After what happened in the kitchen earlier, umbreon had decided that he does not trust Grumpy enough to leave me alone with that disagreeable pikachu.
"I'm not sure if you had heard about it before, but there's this weird one in a million medical condition that can sometimes be found in pokemon that makes them unable to undergo evolution. Stagnatumevolere, I believe, is the official medical term for it. The commonly used slang for it among trainers is the Everstone Syndrome."
"And Grumpy is that unlucky one in a million lottery winner?" I deduced as I looked at Grumpy, who was now curled up on the tabletop and purposely showing me his back. I can't really tell if he was silently fuming in anger or was doing so to simply snub me in the face.
"A pokemon's worth isn't defined by whether they are able to undergo evolution or not, but unfortunately there are many trainers who are unable to understand this fact," Elesa confirmed my deductions as she lightly stroked Grumpy's back with her free hand. "I don't know the whole story myself, but pikachu's trainer harmed it in a fit of rage when he realised that wasn't able to evolve pikachu with a Thunder Stone. By the time I received a tipoff about a possible case of pokemon abuse and arrived at the scene, the injuries I found were the shattering of most of the bones on its left side and the irreversible damage done to the electric sacs in its cheeks. That's severe enough to prevent a pikachu from ever participating in a battle ever again."
"And that heartless shit?"
"Locked behind bars for the next five years, made sure of it myself. That was two years ago," Elesa said as she drank another spoonful of soup.
"So you run a mini adoption centre?" I asked when I recalled that she mentioned that Grumpy was not the only abandoned pokemon she had taken in and raised.
"I won't call it that, but if it helps you to understand, yes, I do. I try to rehabilitate these pokemon and find them a new home. Some do, most never did. You are the first person I met who is able to get Grumpy to actually be somewhat amicable."
I had to fight the urge to roll my eyes. Somewhat amicable. Yeah, somewhat amicable, right.
"And that's why you asked if I would want to adopt that thing," I nodded along to show that I am following before pointing at Grumpy with my fork. That little prick was still curled up and showing its back to me, but has also resumed glaring at me over its back while releasing erratic sparks of electricity in silent warning.
"Look at it. Look, just look at that little bugger. It definitely will murder me in my sleep given the first chance to do so."
"That's the friendliest look I've ever seen it giving to anybody else."
"That's the friendliest look? Grumpy looks exactly like what you expect from a trigger happy murderer condensed into the form of a small little manifestation of negativity."
"It suits your personality just fine, doesn't it? Takes a murderer to know one."
"Oh, so you are making things personal now, eh? Now that's low."
"Pikachu's fine, really, he's just born with a resting bitch face. Are you going to judge it for something it is born with and never asked for?" Elesa argued as she took Grumpy in her arms and showed him to me.
"Look, look at him, he's so cute!"
Grumpy bared his fangs at me with a low growl, as if daring me to try agreeing with Elesa.
"Cute. Very cute," I said with the straightest face I could ever manage as I stabbed my fork into a slice of tomato with more force than strictly needed and offered it to Grumpy.
"Wouldn't you say so, cutie?"
Grumpy angrily bit off the slice of tomato from the fork with the most vengeful look I ever seen from a pikachu, loudly chewing and gnashing his teeth with every bite to convey his dislike for me in black and white.
"Guess Cutie's a no go. I think he prefers the name Grumpy."
"You have such a bad taste in names," Elesa shot me a look of distaste as she placed Grumpy back down on the table surface before sliding Grumpy over into my direction such that we were now staring at each other's faces just at an arm's length apart.
"Congrats, he's yours now. Treat him nicely, okay?"
"How about I request for a refund? I'm sure we are both of the same mind that we are not suited for each other," I immediately refused Elesa's offer and Grumpy nodded his head in quick repetition to voice his agreement, still loudly chewing on that tomato slice. How does a pikachu chew that loud anyway?
"I think the both of you are perfect for each other," Elesa replied with such sincerity in her voice that I cannot help but think that this was what she genuinely felt. "I mean, look, both of you have the exact same look on your faces. Besides, you already gave him a name, he might as well be yours."
I slowly turned towards Grumpy, who is also mirroring what I am doing. The silent staring ensued.
"See? Perfectly alike. Both of you are a match made in heaven."
"Like hell," I spat just as Grumpy spat out the tomato that he was chewing on. It didn't help our cause since we were both acting the same way.
"I don't care, he's yours now," Elesa ate another spoonful of her dinner without a care in the world as she made that declaration. "Already helped you to file the adoption papers online anyway."
"When on earth did you do that?"
"When I went up just now? Just before I went to take my shower? Why else do you think I took so long?"
"And my opinion doesn't matter because?"
"Pikachu doesn't need much taking care of in the first place, and he doesn't even cost much in terms of upkeep. If you are able to afford feeding a hydreigon a pikachu wouldn't even be a problem. Come on, don't tell me that you are unable to make friends with a pikachu when you could clearly do so with a hydreigon? And pikachu clearly likes you!"
"This little guy is the type to try and murder me in a fistfight," I pointed at Grumpy with my fork, who was doing exactly what I just said and demonstrating my point. He was now standing on his hind legs at his full height, his front paws clenched and held up and its cheeks still sparking away in a show of challenge.
"No, it's just how pikachus show that they trust you. Trust me, I'm the electric type expert here. Pikachu there is just born with a resting bitch face that is easily misunderstood. He's actually really nice and cute."
I spotted umbreon subtly shaking his head at me, telling me that I'm not the only one who thought that Grumpy looked just like an insane little murderous rat and that Elesa was clearly delusional.
Just as I am trying to conduct a silent non-verbal conversation with umbreon through our eyes on how we can possibly rid ourselves of Grumpy, Elesa stood up, walked over, picked Grumpy up and dropped him onto my lap. I looked down at Grumpy as Grumpy looked up at me. The foul grin on Grumpy's face widened, which is further proof of my suspicions.
This damn little rat will definitely murder me in my sleep at the first possible opportunity.
Name: Jayce Dandolos
Age: 22
Pokemon Team:
1. Ninetales, female
2. Exeggutor, male
3. Weavile, male
4. Honchkrow, female
5. Umbreon, male
6. Hydreigon, male
7. Drapion, female
8. Zoroark, male
9. Bisharp, male
10. Shiftry, male
11. Porygon-Z, (Nosy), genderless
12. Greninja, male
13. Spiritomb, male
14. Pikachu, (Grumpy), male
Name: Elesa Euclid
Pokemon Team:
1. Zebstrika (Dazzle)
2. Emolga (Mimi)
3. Emolga (Nana)
4. Ampharos
5. Galvantula
6. Eelektross
7. Stunfisk
8. Luxray
9. Dedenne
10. Alolan Raichu
11. Jolteon