I had another day off of work, so it was the perfect chance to get a date night with Eddie. As I got into his van after school, with some snide glances from Jason and the basketball team, Eddie had promised to make up for the previous night if I gave him the chance. Dinner at his place - pizza, popcorn, and a movie. A night with just us. All alone. I couldn't refuse the offer, but I played it cool with a "sure" and a shrug when I agreed. On the inside, I felt giddy.

"So here she is," he said as he held the door open, closing it after himself, "the grand reveal."

I stepped up into the trailer. Baseball caps were on the walls, and a pile of jumbled men's clothes were in a basket in the corner. From the muted colors to the six pack of beer on the kitchen counter, it in all accounts looked like a bachelor pad.

Eddie put his hands in his pockets. "It's not much, but it's home."

"It's cozy," I said.

"Cozy is an interesting word choice. Though I guess I can't complain. I've heard worse."

"Are you sure your uncle is going to be out all night?"

He laughed to himself. "Yep, he's out making the big bucks to put a roof above our heads. So six nights a week it's just me and my guitar jamming out. I've actually been practicing this new Metallica album that just came out. I'm pretty stoked."

"You'll have to play me something."

"Yeah? Are you into metal?"

I shrugged. "Does Def Leppard count?

He grimaced dramatically. "We'll work on that."

I laughed. "Teach me something new then. I'm all ears for whatever you got."

He stepped forward, taking his hands from his pockets and placing them on my hips. "Well, maybe I could play a little for you, if you really wanted me to."

"For me?" I asked, placing my hand on his chest as he got closer.

"Or with you."

What happened next happened in an instant. My hands were around his neck, and my lips were pressed onto his, hungrily kissing. I pushed my body against his. His movements mimicked my own with ease, wrapping his arms tighter around me, closer against his body.

I pulled back, breathing heavily. "Don't you want dinner first?" I half-jokingly asked, half-frightened at how quickly into the night I couldn't resist him.

He grinned. "That can wait."

Our lips met again in a hurry of desire. He smiled into our kiss, walking me backwards towards his bedroom. With lips still on mine, he reached around me to push the door wide open, hitting the wall.

My back was on the bed in an instant. He pulled away, leaning over me from the edge of the bed with a desiring grin, my legs dangling on either side of him. My hands slid down the front of his chest to his belt. I wanted nothing more than to unbuckle them but was scared; my experience was mute.

"Eddie, I - " I started but couldn't finish.

He looked at me with big eyes, attentive, waiting for me to tell him yes. He could tell I was nervous. "You're the driver, okay?"

His body was over mine now, kissing my neck. His hands were trailing everywhere, cupping over my breasts and squeezing gently. He'd lifted up my shirt, and with the permission we silently exchanged, he kissed down my stomach slowly to the edge of my pleated skirt.

I felt myself aching.

His eyes looked into mine intensely as his hand traveled under my skirt, up my leg. His fingers played with the hem of my panties, his smile widening as he could now feel my excitement for him soaking through them.

"Can I?" He asked, trailing the hem.

I nodded. "Mhmm," was all I could say.

His fingers moved the panties to the side and into me - slow at first, then faster as he watched me weak with pleasure mounting. One finger...then another...His thumb was softly teasing the throbbing part of me, not fully giving me what I wanted.

He was still smiling as he leaned over my body and kissed me. From beneath his jeans, I could feel him pressing into me, ready to come out. "Do you want more?"

Was the sky blue?

My fingers ran softly on his cheek. "Eddie, I want to, it's just..." Jeez, it was one thing to worry; it was another to look like a total dweeb for wanting to hold off. I felt my cheeks hot with embarrassment.

"What?"

I nodded. "I don't want you to think I don't want you."

He sighed. "You aren't ready, are you?"

I turned my head away, unable to reply. There was a moment of tense silence.

He kissed my neck, then up to my cheek. "I'm always ready." He laughed. "But I get it."

"Do you?"

"You don't know how bad I want you, Steph," he said.

Believe me: I did. But was it okay - giving yourself to a guy on the second date when you'd had a year-long relationship and never once wanted to? I didn't want anyone to call me a slut nor have Eddie think I was easy. People talked in Hawkins. By eighteen, I thought I'd be a lot better at making decisions about my body, and as a legal adult, I thought life would get a whole lot easier with independence, but you can surely fuck things up at any point in your life. I hoped I wasn't now.

"So so bad," he went on. He playfully shook his head. "I'm going to be thinking about this when you leave, you know? Like for quite a while."

I laughed.

"Believe me, I will," he said. "Like as soon as you leave tonight."

"I hope you do," I said.

He breathed a heavy sigh. "I guess we should order that pizza now," he said. "I might need to take a quick cold shower though, if you don't mind."

I nudged him playfully, and he smiled. "No romance movies," I said. "Something funny."

"But I rented Love Story," he said, serious now. "I heard you guys talking in Family Video. I was trying to pull the right move with it. Was I off it?"

The gesture was so sweet, albeit off the mark. I couldn't be disappointed in the thoughtfulness.

"Okay, I can get down with Love Story," I said, "as long as you promise not to cry at the end."

He pretended to think a moment. "Of all the promises I could make to you, I might not be able to follow through on that one."

I giggled.

I rested my hand on one cheek and leaned up to kiss him. It was so soft, and for a moment, I thought maybe Chrissy was right about knowing you'd made the right decision.