Chapter Six
"Heart of Gold"
It had been a little over two weeks since she'd woken up, and Kagome was finally able to take a shower on her own. She shut the water off, sitting back in the chair to catch her breath.
"You okay?" Inuyasha asked, knocking on the bathroom door.
"Yeah," she called back, catching her breath. "Yeah, I'm okay." She pushed herself up, wrapping a towel around her before changing into a clean pair of what she now referred to as 'daytime pajamas.'
She braced herself against the counter.
Showering was hard.
Showering should be considered an Olympic event. Definitely not for the weak.
She opened the door to the bathroom, hair still dripping but wrapped in a towel.
"See?" She said as he quickly picked her up and sat her on the bed. "I did it," she cheered weakly.
"You did too much," he commented as she pushed herself farther back on the bed. "You should've said something."
"And what? Have you come busting in there while I'm naked?" She said with a breathy laugh. Inuyasha hopped up on the bed, lightly toweling her hair.
"You're gonna catch a cold at this rate," he muttered, pressing the excess water out. "Didn't Sango bring you any real clothes?"
"These are real clothes," she pointed out, tugging lightly at the edge of the pajama shorts.
"Your entire back is soaked." He plucked at the fabric sticking to her skin. "I'm getting you a new shirt."
"You might as well finish first," she commented, and Inuyasha choked a bit on air.
"Where's that fucking hairbrush?"
She glanced over her shoulder as he quickly moved to dig around in the top drawer of her table, before retrieving a hair brush and reclaiming his position behind her as he worked the brush gently through her hair, grumbling at her the entire time for being foolish enough to allow herself to get sick from wet clothes.
"I'm not going to get sick, Inuyasha," she said as he gently combed the tangles in her hair.
"Shows what you know," he said, carefully setting the towel under her hair. "I'm getting you some dry clothes."
He slid off the bed, tossing the brush onto the end table.
"Inuyasha, it'll be fine."
But he wasn't hearing it. He came marching out of the bathroom.
"Wasn't Sango supposed to come bring you clothes?" He snapped, growling his way to the door. He pulled the door open, and Kagome watched him lean outside, but he didn't say a word.
"Inuyasha?" She watched him slowly close the door, stepping back inside.
"Stay here. Something's up. I'll be right back." He looked at her. "I mean it, stay in the room and fry any fucker that ain't me."
He stepped outside, the shadow him disappearing around the curtain.
A few seconds later, Inuyasha came back inside, pressing something to the door. There was a thump behind him, but it didn't seem to bother him.
"What was it?"
"Something happened down the hallway. Guards went to check it out. It's okay. False alarm."
"That's—that's good, right?" She asked him, shifting to allow him to sit on the edge of the bed, but he remained standing.
"You could say that." He tilted his head slightly, looking at her.
Something felt off—something felt wrong. He didn't feel the same.
She caught the barest of movements, flaring her reiki just a half second before his hand connected with her face, sending her tumbling off the bed and sliding across the floor into the couch.
"You fucking bitch!" He snarled, waving his smoking hand. "I'll carve you to fucking pieces before I'm done."
"Inu—!" Her shout ended in a gurgle as his hand snapped against her throat, making parts of her groan under the sheer force.
"Where is it?"
Her eyes watered as she gasped for air, lungs already burning and vision blurring. Her fingers scrabbled against his fingers, but she couldn't any purchase under his fingers.
"Where is the jewel? What did you do with it?" He hissed at her, but his grip on her throat was too tight to let her speak. "I checked the ship, and it's not there. What did you do with it?"
His grip shifted to let her breathe a little, but his fingers pressed tightly against her jaw, making it feel as though it would snap at any given moment.
"Smashed it," she rasped and he sucker punched her in the gut, making her double over in pain.
"Liar. I would know."
"Threw it out—in space." Another punch to her still healing leg, and the sharp flares of pain made her brain blur everything together. She was sure she made a terrible noise from it.
Youki, dark and furious, rose up around her, and she coughed as she breathed it in, making her lungs feel like they were turning to goo with each painful gasp of air.
Focus. Ignore everything else and focus.
She needed to focus.
"Your dog isn't coming to save you," he said.
She hacked up something onto the floor. It felt like a vital organ, and it might've been considering the wet plop it made. Fingers in her hair wrenched her head back as she gasped.
"How do you think I got this face?"
Pictures floated around her face of Admiral Kagewaki, and something deep down in her flared to life as his fingers sank into the flesh at her hips, breaking the delicate scar tissue as he tried to pry and rip something out of her.
"I bet it's here, isn't it?"
A swirl of power flared enveloping them both, and there was a hoarse and raw shout behind her and the fingers were ripped away.
Because if Inuyasha didn't exist in this world any longer, then she'd make sure that he didn't either. Even if that meant she went down with him too. There were worse things to die over.
The sound of glass breaking behind her made her turn as her Inuyasha came barreling through the doors.
Her throat burned, but she pointed to the little black tentacled thing darting away behind him and making a noise of protest as it escaped, slithering across the floor.
She coughed again, blood splattering on the singed floor in front of her.
Hands grabbed onto her, and she could barely make out the look of fear in his eyes before her vision blurred over completely.
Inuyasha was talking to her, she could make out his mouth moving frantically, but all she could hear was the sound of blood rushing in her ears and a high pitched whine.
Strong hands clutched at her as she pitched forward towards the tiled floor, blacking out before she ever made contact.
The door opened at the front of the apartment, and she looked up from her book to see who it was.
Inuyasha came in carrying a small tote of groceries.
"How're you feeling?" He asked, setting the bag on the counter.
"Good!"
She smiled up at him as he came up to her, placing a quick kiss to the top of her head, before kneeling down in front of her.
"You're sure? How's your pain?"
"I feel fine," she insisted, and he gave her a relieved smile.
"No pain?" She shook her head, and he sort of slumped a bit. "Good. That's good."
She set her book to the side, and he leaned forward quickly pressing his lips to hers.
"I bought stuff for dinner," he said, pulling away and moving back to the counter.
She watched him moving around the small space, putting things in their proper places. He seemed so at home here, which gave her an infinite amount of peace.
He glanced at her, catching her gaze, pausing in his movements to give her a small—but genuine—smile.
"What?" His ears flicked.
"Nothing," she said with a small shake of her head.
His face grew serious for a moment as he stared her, eyes flicking over her. He set the box of cereal down on the counter.
"You know I love you, right?"
The air grew thin and burned like fire in her lungs, and she found herself clutching at anything and everything as the life she so desperately wanted slipped through her fingers.
Cracking her eyes open, she lolled her head against the pillow. A mask was placed over her nose and mouth.
Her lips felt chapped again, and she tried to pull the mask off so she could at least lick her lips
Her arm was trapped, and she tried wiggling her fingers, but they were currently being held captive.
A small smile dragged across her face at the sight of her CSO completely passed out across her arm and side of her bed.
One arm was draped over her legs as if holding her in place, and the other was curled under his head, but she could feel his fingers intertwined with hers.
His face had slackened, but he looked so tired again. Dark circles had reappeared under his eyes, which was disappointing right after she'd finally gotten him to relax and rest.
His nose scrunched up as she tried to flex her fingers, her nails lightly scratching skin that wasn't hers. Shifting his head, his ears flipped back as he blinked a few times, inhaling sharply before reaching a hand up to rub his eyes.
"Fuck," he muttered to himself, before looking at her and jolting, already on his feet and standing over her.
"Kagome?" He asked, a slow smile breaking out over his face. He still held onto her hand, fingers still intertwined with hers. Relief had settled in over his features, and while she didn't mind the hand holding, she wanted to move the mask, and her other arm was restrained.
She jerked on her hands, both restricted from moving much at all, and she whined in her throat and the sound cracked.
"Hey," he cooed, "it's me. You're safe." He reached off to the side, pulling out a small cup with a spoon. He lifted the mask, placing the spoon at her mouth, where she greedily ate spoonful after spoonful of ice, and he let her.
When she was done, he replaced the mask over her face, and she whined at him.
"It's gotta stay on for a little bit," he explained, trying to situate it properly, but he must've caught the question in her eyes. "Breathing treatments. You inhaled a lot of miasma, and it burned your lungs a bit."
He pushed some hair out of her eyes, hand still holding onto hers.
"They were able to flush it out quickly and said there wasn't permanent lung damage from it, so that's good news," he continued. He was rambling, eyes scanning her face. "They—You—" He looked back at her face before glancing away again and swallowing thickly. She could practically see the lump move in his throat.
Squeezing her hand seemed to be the only form of communication she had at the moment, and she gave him a couple brief squeezes.
"I should've been there. I should've stayed," she squeezed his fingers again, giving her head a soft shake. "This shouldn't have happened."
"No," she tried to speak, but there was something in her mouth and she couldn't.
Something flooded into the mask making her cough pitifully, but still manage to leave her gasping for air and eyes watering.
"Take it easy," he chided gently. "It's just the breathing treatment to help your lungs."
She squeezed his hand as tightly as she could manage, as she hacked so hard it felt like something cracked in her chest, but then it felt like she could breathe, and the relief was so great she almost cried from it.
"I'm going to go get Sango," he said and began to rise up. Her hand snapped against the bonds to reach for him again, but she couldn't get to him. The internal panic rose up, and she made a noise low in the back of her throat.
A machine to her right let out a sharp wail, and Inuyasha quickly moved back to her side, gripping her hand as tightly as she gripped his. Her eyes watered, running down over her cheeks, because she knew that if he left, she'd never see him again. He'd disappear chasing down the thing that hurt her, and he'd just fade away.
She didn't want that, because she wanted him.
They were in orbit right now, one circling the other, and she was afraid that if they broke free of each other then there was a large possibility that they would never meet again. Space was large and dark, and she'd been alone out there for so long before that she never wanted to experience that again.
"Kagome, calm down," he said, looking up at the monitor.
But how could she? How could she calm down when he was so close to breaking free and spiraling out into space alone and in a trajectory that she couldn't follow?
Her chest felt like it was going to explode. The machine kept beeping incessantly.
"Kagome," he held her face in his hands forcing her to look at him and only him. "Look at me. Just me." He stared her. "I'm right here. No one is going to get close to you ever again."
Tears ran down the sides of her face, and he quietly wiped them away.
"Take a deep breath."
Her breathing shuddered a little as she tried to calm herself.
"Please, you gotta calm down. I'm here. I'm not leaving you alone ever again, okay? I'm right here."
She nodded, the mask covering her nose and mouth making it impossible to talk, and she wanted to tell him everything.
But her body betrayed her, threatening her with darkness once again.
"I'll be here," he whispered. "I'll be right here when you wake up."
"I said, fuck off," someone hissed beside her. There was pain but it felt distant. Like she wasn't attached to it.
"Lieutenant," came a whispered voice.
"Don't start. You just checked her five minutes ago!" He snapped. "If you're not going to let her sleep, get out."
There was a long sigh from someone else, and the sound of footsteps leaving them.
"Kagome?" Inuyasha asked, and she could almost see his ears twitching as he listened to her. His hand squeeze hers, and she twitched her fingers back at him, trying to speak.
She inhaled, but it felt shuddering, and a moment later sent her into a coughing fit.
Her eyes watered enough that it helped her break up the crustiness enough so she could finally open them.
Inuyasha gave her a wavering smirk, as she looked up at him. She'd know him anywhere, even when someone else was wearing his face.
He lifted her mask, holding up a glass with a straw, and letting her drink.
"My hand," she rasped, and he looked down at the one closest to him, replacing her mask before deftly undoing the strap around her wrist.
"You got tubes, so you start pullin' at them and I'm going to tie you back down."
He looked tired, and she reached a shaky hand up towards him. Accommodating her, he met her partway, and he let her hand touch his face, her thumb skimming over his cheek. He was warm against her cool fingers.
Phantom words drifted through her head as she touched him.
You know I love you, right?
"Sango and Miroku've been coming to visit you every day," he rambled. "Annoying as all fuck, those two." He stared at her, hand coming to cover her own as he took a seat next to her bed, giving her some relief. "They were afraid you wouldn't make it." He'd gave her a half-grin. "I knew you'd pull through."
His fingers laced between hers as he held her hand against his cheek, and continued to talk about the things that had happened.
"I don't want you getting mixed up in this," Kagome said.
"Yeah, well, you're a little late for that," Sango sniped.
"Sango, please," she said, watching her first officer and best friend pace in the small space. "I'm just trying to protect you, that's all."
"We already told you that we're with you all the way to the end."
Kagome sighed long and heavy as she stared out the windows on the bridge.
When she looked up at the sky at night, she'd always thought that the space would be bright, because there were so many stars, and they shined so bright at night. She thought that it would be like having a night light wherever you went.
But it wasn't like that at all.
Space is so very empty, and it made her treasure the few people that were on the ship with her even more.
"I know, but this isn't what you signed up for. My agenda is mine and mine only. You aren't obligated to be a part of it."
Sango stood there quietly.
"Do you know why I signed up?"
"Because your father was part of the Alliance?"
"Mmm," Sango hummed. "That's part of it, but there was another reason." She took a breath. "All my life, I've lived in the shadow of my family. You know that we used to fight the youkai as a living?"
"You told me about that once. Back when youkai were attacking human settlements, right?"
"Yeah, well, we started the enforcement agency, and my mother was a high ranking officer before she died." She paused, fidgeting with the cuff of her shirt. "My father wanted me to follow the same path, but I didn't want to do that. I didn't want to be like my mother. I don't want Kohaku to feel like he has to be like our father."
Her eyes darted towards Kagome, but then turned back towards the view.
"So I joined the Alliance and wound up on Mushin's ship. I almost quit and ran home, because anything was better than that hot mess. But then I met you, and that was that. I joined the Alliance to strike my own path."
"Still doesn't mean that you have to follow me. The things that I'm doing—that I'm going to have to do—they could end your career. It could be dangerous."
Sango rested her hand on Kagome's shoulder.
"How about you worry about your career, and I'll worry about mine, alright?" Sango said, drawing her in for a hug. "You're the only best friend I've got in this place. It would be remiss of me to let you go off to stage a coup and not help."
Kagome let out a watery laugh.
"Thought Miroku was your new best friend."
"Miroku is—something else."
"Thanks, Sango."
"Whatever you need, Captain, you have it."
"In seculo seculorum?"
"Always and forever," Sango agreed. "Now, we should probably go make sure Inuyasha hasn't murdered my newfound playmate."
No one would tell her the damage that had been done to her body, but when they'd finally removed the mask and the variety of tubes that had been shoved down her nose and throat a couple days later, she had the opportunity to talk and ask questions.
But the news had been mixed. Overall, she'd come out relatively unscathed. She hadn't suffered any burns, though the soft tissue of her lungs had been aggravated.
However, when he'd stabbed her over the newly healed wound, he'd damaged some of her insides with miasma. Most of it was healing and would recover completely. Unfortunately, one of her ovaries had scarred so severely that they'd been unable to save it.
"You will still be able to have children," they reassured her, "but it may take a little more effort than more traditional couples."
Her mind was still reeling over the previous revelation to even unpack that little phrase.
Inuyasha had been true to his word and hadn't left her side. When he'd step out for a moment, the heart monitor gave away her fear and thoughts. The first time it had happened, he'd leaned back inside the room, keeping his hand visible on the door and positioning his shoulder so that she could still see it from the bed.
Since then, he'd stayed in the room and within her sight. But he'd kept his distance since the doctors revealed that she'd been reduced.
They'd offered her counseling several times, and each time she'd refused. She didn't need it, but they kept insisting that she should talk to someone. But she didn't want to talk about it, because while awful, it wasn't the end all be all. She could still have kids, eventually.
She hadn't thought that it mattered that much, but apparently, it mattered to Inuyasha since he wouldn't come within arm's reach of her.
The fleet admiral had returned with his entourage to 'check in' on her healing and to reassure her that they were 'all hands on deck' in trying to find the villain who'd broken in.
"Captain Higurashi," the fleet admiral said, nodding his hand at her. "How're you feeling?"
Inuyasha flinched at the question.
"I've been better," she answered simply.
"I wanted to reassure you that we're putting all available resources on the case to find this monster, especially after the damage he's caused you." The fleet admiral dragged a chair to her bedside, and he very gently took her hand, patting it lightly. "I understand that this is a very trying time for you, but we will think nothing less of you because of your reduced abilities."
"She's not fucking paralyzed!" Inuyasha snapped. "And even if she was, she'd still beat half the kissasses in this place!"
The fleet admiral turned his steely gaze to Inuyasha, who was visibly bristling. If he had hackles, they'd be completely on end.
"Fleet Admiral Oyama," Kagome interrupted, drawing his attention back to her, "my lieutenant has a valid—albeit poorly worded—point. I fully intend to return to active duty as soon as I'm released to do so."
"Well, we don't want to you to rush yourself. We can have a temporary captain put in place if you feel you are unable to maintain your duties."
"I assure you, sir, I am eager to be back on my ship."
Something unpleasant flickered across his face ending in a smile.
"Glad to hear it Captain Higurashi. We look forward to having you back on board." He shifted his position in the chair, leaning forward slightly. "We do have some questions for you about what transpired the day that you lost," his words drifted off as he made a motion to her abdomen.
"The day that I was attacked, you mean."
"Yes, can you explain how the creature was partially purified? You have no reiki abilities according to your file, and I can see where you were tested when you were a young child. The miasma was also purified. It's what saved ultimately saved your life."
"I—" She started, already feeling—and hearing—her heart rate pick up.
"Reiki bomb," Inuyasha answered quickly.
"A reiki bomb?" The fleet admiral asked.
"Yeah," Inuyasha shrugged, as if this was completely common knowledge. "We've heard rumors that some of the rebelling planets were looking to develop something like that—highly unstable, you understand—but it's an explosion of reiki."
"I've never heard any such rumors. But why would a youkai have a bomb that could destroy them?"
"Suicide bomber?" He said with another shrug. "Fucker was clearly crazy to come after the captain like he did. We already know that he murdered that priest to use the ofuda like he did."
"He murdered a priest?" Kagome asked, glancing between the two men.
"So he's gotta be off his rocker," Inuyasha continued like she hadn't even spoken. "Probably thought he'd take himself and the captain out. Not like we haven't seen that sorta thing before."
The fleet admiral seemed to consider it, and rose to his feet.
"I will let you get some rest. Let my office know if you need anything."
"Of course, gladly."
The moment the door closed, Inuyasha snapped.
"That fucker!" Inuyasha raged, youki swirling around him.
"Inuyasha," she said, trying to grab his hand as he passed, but she still had limited movement.
"Acting like you're—you're—less because of what happened! That pompous fucking—ass waffle!"
"Inuyasha," she repeated a little louder as he continued to pace near her bed, hands clenching into fists.
"Say the word, Kagome, and I'll rip out his spine through his dick."
"That seems oddly specific."
He growled, muttering under his breath, ears completely flattened against his head. She sighed, resting back against her pillow.
"Do you think that I'm less than?" She asked quietly, and Inuyasha froze mid-step, almost appearing frozen in time before he spun around glowering at her. The rage radiating off of him she'd only seen a couple of times and never directed at her.
"What?" He snarled, leaning down into her face, hands planted on either side of her hips. "Are you fucking kidding me?" His eyes narrowed. "You think that I'm anything like those pompous little manbitches?" His hands fisted in the sheets so tightly that she could hear them ripping and puncturing the fabric. "What the fuck would even give you that idea?"
"You just—you haven't—" Her face flamed at revealing what had been bothering her this entire time. She picked at her nails; her voice reduced to half syllables of words.
He carefully sat on the side of her bed, close to her and taking her hands in his.
"Kagome?" He asked quietly. "What is it?"
"I didn't think that it was that big of a deal. I mean, I can still have kids. But everyone's making such a big deal about it, and you—" Her voice failed her again.
"What?" He pressed, squeezing her hands. "What did I do?"
"You just stopped," she said, trying to gesture with her hands, but he kept them pinned in his own.
"Stopped what?"
God, he was actually going to make her say it, wasn't he?
And she'd spent all this time telling people that he was really smart.
"Touching me," she whispered, and he leaned back, dropping his hold on her hands.
Well, she supposed it was better to just sever the cord and accept her losses. Probably should start looking for a new tactical off—
Inuyasha wrapped his arms around her, leaning towards her, and she buried her face into his shoulder, holding tight onto him.
"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I thought—you should hate me," she shook her head. "You have every right to hate me."
"I don't," she cried, shaking her head and fisting his shirt in her hands. "I couldn't."
"You know I wouldn't do any of this for just anyone, right?" He said, stuttering a bit over his words. "Like they gotta be special. Real special."
She sniffled, nodding.
"You—You're—You're that kinda special," he whispered.
"You're that kinda special to me too, you know."
He hummed a bit, leaning his head against hers.
"Don't listen to those fuckers. They don't know shit about shit."
She giggled.
"You would make a wonderful poet, you know." She laughed, pausing only to yawn.
"Nap time, Captain," he said, pulling away, but she snagged the front of his shirt.
"Stay?"
He nodded, deftly shifting to the other side of the bed as she tried to move herself over as much as possible. He slid in beside her, arm slipping in behind her neck, as he lowered the bed back to a more comfortable angle. He tugged her in close to him, nose buried in her hair.
When the Fleet Admiral had talked about adjusting her budget, she'd thought maybe a one and a half times increase as a best case scenario. But her budget had tripled. And none of the repairs to the Shin-ryoku had come out of it, so she had serious cash flow for her ship.
And for once, she didn't know where to spend it.
She already had new engines.
Upgraded cabins for the crew and bridge.
Kaede had a newly minted medical wing.
And she had Reggie still.
She'd been cleared to leave the hospital a few days ago but under strict orders to remain on bed rest, and Inuyasha had quickly squirreled her away into the apartment provided by the Alliance. According to him, "if they wanted to pay for it, why not take the fuckers' money?"
She suspected it had more to do with the fact that the hospital had been breached in terms of security, and hiding her away would allow him more control over who visited her.
She was restricted to minimal activity, and that apparently meant that she was not allowed to do anything but move slowly around the apartment, and according to Inuyasha's personal medical dictionary, sit on her butt for the vast majority of the day and night doing nothing but watching him work.
Inuyasha was waiting on her hand and foot.
And it was driving her absolutely mad. Especially since, Kagome was quickly finding out that after saying they were 'special' to each other, Inuyasha wasn't about to let them slip back into the way things had been before.
She sat on the couch, leaning back against the pillows as rain pattered against the apartment windows. It was cool, and she contemplated grabbing a blanket, but they were all the way across the room, and her book was getting to a good place, and she was finally comfortable.
Footsteps came up behind her.
"Cold?" He asked, and she winced.
How did he always know?
"Maybe a little?"
He huffed.
"Liar," he said, walking over to grab a blanket from the small stack. "You should've said something."
"You're already doing so much though. I was just being lazy."
"You're recuperating, not being lazy." He sat down beside her, twisting himself to lean back against the arm and the pillows. "C'mere." He held his arms out for her and she scooted a little closer, shifting slowly because she almost expected him to flat out flee at any second, but he just sat there patiently waiting. He reached over, guiding her to sit so that her back was leaning against his chest. Flicking the blanket open, he threw it over the both of them.
She wriggled just a bit, getting into a comfortable position to read her book.
"You good?" He asked her, stretching his legs out.
"Yep!" She chirped, continuing to read and relish in the body heat rolling off of him. She brushed her foot against his, and he yelped, jerking his foot away.
"Holy shit!" He reached out, grabbing her hands. "You are a fucking ice cube, woman!" He tucked her hands in under the blanket as he pressed his legs against hers. "Why didn't you say anything?"
"I wasn't that cold, and I was finally comfortable."
"Are you hurting?"
"No, I'm just stiff from sitting all the time, because someone won't let me do anything."
"You're on bed rest."
She sighed, letting her head fall back gently against his collarbone.
"You're really frustrating," she said.
"The same could be said about you," he retorted, thumbs running over the backs of her hands.
"How am I frustrating?" She asked, trying to shift so she could see his face.
"Always wanting to do shit," his voice shifted into a falsetto. "I'm going to clean the bathroom. I'm going to do the dishes. I'm gonna go do high impact aerobics when I'm still healing."
"I did not say any of those things."
He huffed. The air making some of her hair move next to her face.
"You just—everything—" He growled briefly in frustration before his head leaned against hers. "You don't know what it's like—how close you were."
"I'm sorry."
She interlaced his fingers with hers, tugging his arms around her, and he took the initiative and hugged her tighter.
"You know, if I didn't already have white hair, I'm sure you'd have given me some by now."
She laughed, and so did he.
After a moment, he released her hands, and she curled up against him continuing to read. His arms remained around her, and his legs curled around hers as they sat, reading and listening to the rain.
He was currently washing dishes, because he'd refused to let her do anything.
She'd tried, made a concerted effort to do something around this little living space, but he frustratingly insistent.
She'd had her wrists in the dishwater before Inuyasha caught her pulling her back from the counter.
"Inuyasha," she whined.
"No, you're still healing. Go sit."
"I can clean a few dishes," she said as he took the rag and wiped her hands down.
"Go sit," he said.
"What happened to me being the one who gives orders?" She asked as he shooed her away.
"When we're back on the ship, you can give as many orders as you want." He said, taking her spot at the counter.
Kagome watched him for a moment as he pushed his sleeves up and dipped them into the water.
There was still a very defined line between them, and she wanted to remove it.
He wasn't doing anything about it, and that was her biggest problem.
Hands pressed her down, holding her in place.
"You're ruining my fun," came a familiar voice, and she could feel the leather straps binding her legs to the bed, digging into her skin.
"There is only one way to remove what is required."
She fought the restraints, thrashing wildly under the lights as the cold steel made goosebumps rise up on her skin.
"Inuyasha!" She screamed. "Inuyasha!"
She hadn't been alone a second ago.
Where was he?
The hard bite of the scalpel dug into her skin, and she howled.
"Please!"
The face above her morphed into Admiral Kagewaki's.
"Where is it?"
"Don't do this!" She begged, tears running down her cheeks.
"Where is it?"
"Kagome!"
"Why are you doing this?"
"I won't ask again. Where is it?" He held up the bloodied scalpel. "I will dig until I find what you've hidden from me."
"Kagome!"
"Please, don't," she begged him one more time. "Please."
His hand fisted around the scalpel as he drove it down into her leg.
"Kagome!"
She gasped, choking on her own breath, and she couldn't make out anything in the darkness through her own tears. Hands clutched at her arms, and she fought them, but their grip was like iron, and she couldn't break free.
"Let me go!"
"Kagome! It's me!" Inuyasha's voice rang in her ears. "You're okay. It's just me."
"Where did you go?" She whispered, trying to gather her wits.
"Nowhere," he said, shifting closer. "I never left. I was right here."
She looked around the room, but it was too dark to see anything.
Inuyasha leaned over, tapping the lamp with his fingers to turn it on.
She squinted, blinking a few times, helping her eyes focus.
She wasn't on the ship. She was in the apartment. In her room.
She wasn't alone. Inuyasha sat right next to her on the bed, hands still holding onto her.
She looked down at her leg, but there was no blood. She was fine, even though her hands trembled and shook.
There was a knock at the front door and a garbled question.
"I'm okay," she whispered.
"Bullshit," he said, standing up. "I'll be right back. You stay right there."
He stood, walking to the doorway, hesitating for only a second to look back at her. There was another knock, and he growled, glaring at the hallway.
"Right there," he grumbled, pointing his finger at her. "Hold onto your fucking panties, I'm comin'!"
She wrapped her hands around herself, rubbing her arms. The door opened, and she heard Inuyasha talking to someone else. Probably the guards outside her apartment.
She rubbed her face as footsteps came back to her room. Looking up, she watched as Inuyasha reclaimed his spot right next to her on the bed.
"Sorry," she mumbled already feeling foolish at waking him up. "It was just a bad dream. I'm fine. You can go back to bed."
"What was it about?" He asked.
She shook her head.
"It's dumb."
"Kagome, tell me."
She hadn't really talked about it with anyone. They'd filled in the blanks from what they'd seen of her body, and guessed at some things, but she really hadn't told them everything, and she really didn't want to.
But this was Inuyasha.
"Kagome, it's just me. No one else."
"I—I was back on the ship. In the medical bay." She took a deep breath. "And—" Her voice petered off as she tried to figure out how to word out what had happened. "They were just cutting—but I'm not bleeding. It's dumb."
He sighed, reaching out to hold onto her hand.
"It's not dumb." He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. "It's not. Sometimes bad things stick with you long after they happen."
She nodded, resting her hand over his.
"I don't know what I'd do without you sometimes."
"Die, probably."
She rolled her eyes at him, and he gave her a smile.
"You good?"
She nodded, and he reached over to tap the light off.
Taking a breath, he stood up, dragging his hand away from her.
However, she snagged his wrist, halting his escape.
"Stay?" She asked him, even though she couldn't see his expression. "Please?"
"Yeah, 'course."
She let go of him and tugged the blankets back for him.
He didn't climb into the bed right away, and she felt fear creeping into the back of her throat.
She'd screwed up. Asked too much. Too much, too quickly, too fast. She was reading into things and projecting.
But then the bed shifted, and Kagome felt a smidgen of the panic recede.
Inuyasha slid in beside her, and she stretched out on her side, facing the wall.
It was a long moment of silence, and she took a deep breath to calm her nerves. The bed shifted again as Inuyasha drew himself up behind her. An arm wrapped around her waist, tugging her back towards him.
It was quiet in the darkness of their apartment.
"I left you a message with Reggie. Did you ever listen to it?"
"No," Inuyasha mumbled into her shoulder.
"Why not?"
"Didn't want to hear it. Whatever you said, you could say it to my face." His legs shifted, curling up behind hers. "Now, go to sleep. It's late."
"What's wrong with your face?" Inuyasha asked, plopping down next to her on the couch. Right next to her. Like within cuddling closeness.
She didn't know what to say or how to express it.
He'd seen the message she'd sent to everyone, what she thought would be her last few dying words to anyone and everyone. He'd seen the message, the jewel in her hand, but he hadn't asked about any of it.
No one had.
Then again, Inuyasha was kind of squirreling her away into the apartment. Miroku and Sango had only visited a couple of times and for short periods, because Inuyasha sent them packing under the premise that they weren't letting her rest. She wasn't allowed to leave without him, and he'd only just started allowing her to do the dishes after meals, even though he still hovered incessantly.
"You never asked," she said after a long moment.
"Asked about what?" His head leaned forward a bit in her peripheral vision.
Suddenly, the fear crept in, the question really of whether or not he was being so kind because of it. Because of the jewel.
She knew that she was being foolish. She didn't even know what it did or why it was so important. Only that everyone else seemed to want it.
"Kagome?" He shifted forward to look at her. "What is it?" His hand reached across her lap and gently grabbed hers.
She took a steadying breath, looking over at him.
"The jewel," she whispered. "You never asked about it."
He stayed quiet for a beat, eyes watching her so intensely that she couldn't look away.
"Why—Does it bother you?"
"Everyone else seems to want it, but you never asked where it went."
"It—It never mattered to me," he answered. "I never wanted it."
"Do you want to know where it went?" She asked, and he shook his head, leaning back against the couch and draping his arm around her shoulders, tucking her into his side.
"Is it well hidden?" He asked, and she nodded.
"Yeah, I think so."
"Then that's all that matters." He tugged her closer, and she let her head rest on his shoulder.
He didn't care.
He didn't want it.
She smiled, turning towards him, shifting to wrap her arms around his chest. His arm followed her, circling around her back as they sat on the couch together in the quiet peace.
"C'mere," he said, shifting and dragging her and himself on the couch until he was laying on his back and she was on her side in between him and the back of the couch.
He kept his arm around her, and she wriggled her body down slightly so that she was laying her head on his chest, arms still wrapped around him. His hand left her shoulder for just a moment as he dragged the blanket off the couch and flicked it to cover the both of them—but mostly her.
The frantic fear of someone finding it dissipated and with it the remembered pain of her own fingers shoving the jewel back into her own body, where it had been for all these years and where it would rest again.
He didn't want to know, because he didn't want it.
He wanted something else, and she closed her eyes as his head turned towards her, and he buried his nose into her hair as his free arm slid beneath the blanket to cover hers wrapped around his waist.
But there was another nagging question that she'd had for ages now.
"How do you think he knew?" She asked, her fingernails lightly scratching over his skin.
"Who?"
"Admiral Kagewaki. Or the thing pretending to be him."
"How did that asshole know what?"
"Where the jewel was."
Inuyasha's arms tightened around her.
"I didn't even know it was there. How did everyone else know that I had it?"
"I don't know. I guess we'll have to wait until the fucker's caught."
She found that hard to believe. A youkai that could take anyone's face. How easy would it be for him to just hide somewhere?
"He won't get to you," he said. "I won't let him."
"I know."
"You just worry about keeping it safe wherever you put it," he mumbled into her hair. "And I'll worry about keeping you safe, okay?"
"And who's going to worry about you?"
He snorted a bit.
"Miroku probably. Otherwise, he'll have no one else to brag to."
She giggled.
"Don't know why you think that's funny. I have the hardest job outta everyone."
"How do you figure?"
"Please, it's like you try to find trouble."
"I don't," she insisted.
"Starting to think you almost like giving me fucking heart attacks," he mumbled.
She shifted herself so that she could loop her leg over his. He made a small noise that sounded like he approved.
Despite what he said, Kagome was good at keeping secrets. She'd keep this one and one other with her forever.
Kagome did know what happened to the jewel, despite her reports stating otherwise, and the other?
Inuyasha was a relentless cuddler.
Turns out Kagome was a coward.
Like the biggest coward.
She'd had every opportunity to grab those stupid forelocks of his and drag his face to hers, but instead, she'd chickened out and now they were standing on the precipice of her old—but newly renovated—ship.
She'd been cleared to return to light duty, and she'd managed to pass all the exams, health and psychiatric, and now she was claiming her role as captain once again. Her crew had all opted to rejoin her too.
Inuyasha was probably right. She'd put a target on her back by calling out her ranking officers for their clear nepotist attitude towards—well, everything, but she didn't care. It had taken them down a notch.
She walked down the halls of her ship, remembering the fear and the pain. She could see the echoes of her blood staining the walls and floor.
"So, I should—uh—mention something," Inuyasha said following her down the hallway. She glanced over her shoulder at him as she continued walking towards her quarters. "They gutted the ship, and we made some—uh—adjustments." She stopped into front of her door, letting it slide open.
She took a step inside, looking at her room.
"We tried to set it up like you would, so you wouldn't have to," he said.
Her room looked clean and modernized. It looked like almost any other ship in the fleet. Inuyasha dropped her bag on the floor. Her photos hung on the walls, and some were set on the shelves.
"I also—uh—got you some new uniforms. Ones that don't melt."
She turned back to him, grinning.
"It's perfect!" She launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Why didn't you think that I would like it?"
"Well," he started, grabbing her hand and guiding her towards the bathroom. She followed him, staring at the heavily renovated bathroom.
It was massive. There was a bathtub! A bathtub!
"I have a bathtub?"
"One of three in the fleet. Sango figured out how to double the water tanks to make it work."
"But this bathroom is so much bigger than the one I had."
"Well, we made some assumptions, remember." He tugged her focus away from her staring at the bathtub.
A bathtub!
She had a bathtub!
Was it bad that she wanted to try it out right now?
"You keep saying that, but I don't see why—"
That's when she noticed the two sinks and the mirror.
But why would there be two sinks?
And a second door?
"Did you merge Sango's bathroom and mine?"
"Well, yeah, kinda." He tugged her hand again, pulling her towards the door, watching it slide open.
She stepped forward into—not Sango's room. If anything, it looked an awful lot like Inuyasha's.
"Sango and I traded rooms, since the bridge crew rooms are all the same—except for yours—we decided to remodel them so there's—uh—well—easier access."
"Easier access?" She asked, looking up to him.
"Well, you know," he fumbled, looking off to the side. "I told you."
"You didn't tell me about this," she said, and he huffed.
"No, that you're—you know—that kind of special."
She stared at his face, the one actively avoiding looking at her at the moment, and grinned.
She'd been worried that he didn't want what she wanted, but there'd been no reason to worry at all.
"Inuyasha," she whispered.
"I mean, I know I probably should've asked first, but you said that—"
She grabbed a forelock, dragging his face down to hers, firmly pressing her lips against his.
Inuyasha got with the program very quickly, arms coming around her waist, and pressing her closer against him.
One hand slipped up to cradle her head and neck, making sure that she couldn't leave him.
Not that she would want to, considering what his tongue was currently doing in her mouth.
And it made her wonder what else this man could do.
And also how she could get him to do them with her.
Here.
In his room.
Or hers.
She really didn't care.
"Captain," Reggie said right next to her ear, and Inuyasha jumped, pulling away quickly.
"For fuck's sake!" He growled, swiping at the screen that moved just out of his reach.
"What is it, Reggie?" She asked, leaning her head against his shoulder as she caught her breath.
"Lieutenant Commander Sugewara and Lieutenant Machida are looking for you both."
"Thank you, Reggie," she said with a sigh, moving to take a step back, but a firm arm around her waist literally made her stay in place.
"They can fucking wait. I've waited long enough," he said, capturing her mouth again.
Kagome's brain faltered and failed to produce anything resembling a cohesive thought as he pressed her up against a wall.
"Captain?" Shippo asked, scrolling through the screens as she took her seat—her brand new seat that didn't have tape covering the cracked leather or the arms glued into their sockets.
And did she mention that all the buttons worked?
All of them.
There were even new buttons that she hadn't gotten to press yet.
She was going to take their button virginity.
"Yes, Shippo?"
"Can we test the engines?" He asked, already looking at the screen monitoring their speed.
"Weren't the engines already tested?"
"Yeah, but like test them-test them."
"We probably should see what this ship can do," Miroku added from his own new chair. She turned her chair—and her chair actually swiveled without making some horrible groaning-clicking sound!—to look at her communications officer.
"It would be useful in case we had to escape," Sango agreed, though she wasn't looking at her.
She twisted in her seat to find the one other person on her bridge. He was directly behind her, leaning down to place his hands on her arm rests and making it feel as though he were caging her into her own chair.
"Let me me guess, you wanna go fast too?" She asked, leaning back against her chair, and turning back towards the front of the ship.
He leaned down to her ear, his voice barely a whisper.
"Maybe, but I'll let you set the pace later." He pressed a quick and quiet kiss to her temple, and Kagome took a deep steadying breath, crossing her legs.
"You should take your seat, Lieutenant, because we're gonna see what this ship can do," she said, and Shippo's gleeful laughter rang out over the bridge as the low hum of engines grew until they were launching out towards the open space, and for the first time, the idea of being out in the cold dark vastness didn't bother her in the slightest.
A/N: I hope you all enjoyed the ending. I know it's open and it doesn't answer all the questions that it provided. I will admit, I'm not ready to let these characters go just yet. There are a few ideas that didn't get incorporated into the story that are just floating out there at the moment, but I'm not sure how a continuation would look whether that's in more chapters or a separate story altogether. But I want to include and share them, but it's going to take a bit of time before I launch back into this.
So for the moment, I consider this story complete.
I sincerely hope that you all enjoyed it as much as I did.