"Brando…"

I was already out of commission. There was no way I could let him do this and possibly injure himself. If he got hurt, I was unable to care for him. My attempts to stop him went unnoticed as he put his hands on the turbolift door.

"Don't worry; I got this."

Once he had a good enough grip, he started to pull on either side of the door. At first, it didn't move, but he kept at it. He used every muscle in his upper body once he could feel the door giving beneath his hands. Brando let out a deafening cry as he used every last bit of strength to push the doors completely open.

"You…you-."

Letting out a few gasps, he smiled. "Told you I got this. Do you think you can stand?"

I put my palms to the floor and tried to lift myself. But it was no use. I was far too weak. He was able to open a metal door with his bare hands, and I couldn't even stand using mine.

I started to cry. "I-I-I can't. I can't."

He walked over to me and crouched to be a little more level with my body.

"Put your arms around my neck."

I did as he asked and in one swift motion, he lifted me into his arms. I was worried I'd be too much for him to carry, but he didn't seem phased by my weight. He led us out of the turbolift and into the cool hallway. Luckily, the emergency lights were still operational as he took us down the corridor to his quarters. When we finally made it to his door, he sighed.

"Home sweet home."

"Brando…I-I don't feel good."

"I know Sasha. I know. Just a few more seconds, and we'll be in my room."

It took him a few tries, but he finally got the doors to respond and open. Once we were safely inside his room, my eyes darted around, looking for his bathroom.

"Bathroom. I need the bathroom."

"You going to be sick?" He asked as he started to move us towards the lavatory.

All I could do was repeatedly shake my head. Afraid I'd start to vomit right on the spot if I said anything. We reached the bathroom, and Brando quickly placed me gently in front of the toilet. Within seconds the contents of my stomach came up. I could taste Neelix's scrambled eggs he made me this morning, and the taste alone was enough to cause my stomach to churn. I'm sure if Brando saw, he would have tried to make some joke about the Telaxian's cooking. His way to try and lighten the mood. Instead, he quietly sat behind me and rubbed my back. I was mortified. He shouldn't have to see me like this. When I finally felt like I got everything up, I moaned.

"You-you shouldn't have to see me like this, Brando."

"Who better than someone who's been where you are now?"

After a long sigh, I said it. What I had been afraid to admit to myself and him. "It…it should have been me."

"What are you talking about?"

I slowly turned, so I was facing him. "It should-it should have been me that died in that massacre."

Thousands of her friends had died back home in the war against the Cardassians. Most of the Maquis were either dead, in prison, or stranded on Voyager. When they managed to establish a connection with Earth Commander Chakotay got a letter from a friend who was in prison. She told him what happened, and he took it as his duty to inform the rest of the Maquis members of the crew. He told Sasha first because he didn't want her to hear it from anyone else. Shortly after that, she let it slip to Brando. But that was months ago.

"Sasha don't say that."

"You don't understand!" I tried to move to stand but instantly got dizzy. I slump back against the toilet and groan.

"Then help me understand Sasha. I want to understand. Please." There was a long silence before he sighed. "Are you trying…are you trying to commit suicide?"

My eyes grow as wide as saucers. "What? No!"

"Then why are you doing this?"

She was the strongest person he knew. So, it had to be something terrible for her to resort to using drugs.

"Because…because when I do this at least, I feel something."

He cocks his head to the side. When he used it, it was to forget. To numb the pain. With Sasha, it was different.

"What do you mean?"

"The moment that sent you over the edge. The moment before you started using. How…how did you feel?"

"Honestly? Angry. Sad. And a little disappointed. Because as much as I didn't want to admit it, I hated what getting kicked out of Starfleet would do to my dad."

"Not me. When my friends died, I-I didn't feel anything."

"Sasha, the Maquis were like your adopted family. I can understand you trying to block out that kind of pain."

I start to get angry. "You don't understand. It's not just the pain. I don't feel anything! Not about my dead friends, not about you, the rest of the ship, my job."

"Maybe you're afraid if you let yourself start to feel this, you might not be able to stop. But you can't just shut off your emotions, Sasha. Sooner or later, you're going to have to let yourself grieve."

I begin to tear up. "Why? Just so I can go through it all over again?"

"What are you talking about?"

"When I was six, my father walked out on me. When I was nineteen, I got kicked out of Starfleet. A few years later, I got separated from the Maquis. And just when I start to feel safe, Chakotay tells me that all of our old friends have been slaughtered. The way I figure it, I've lost every family I've ever had."

He frowns. Did she think she'd lose Him? There makeshift family aboard Voyager? "Sasha, you have a new family now, here on Voyager. You're not going to lose us; lose me. You're stuck with us."

I shake my head and abruptly stop when a new wave of nausea hits. "You-you can't promise me that, Brando."

"No, I suppose I can't. Losing people's inevitable, and sometimes it happens sooner than we expect. But I can promise you that the people on this ship aren't about to let you stop living your life or succumb to drugs. Me especially. I will give everything I have to help you get through this. So, I'm sorry, but you're going to have to find another way to deal with this."

His words move me so much that I start to sob. "I-I don't know how."

He immediately pulls me into his arms and holds me close to his chest. "Then we'll figure it out. Together. You won't have to do this alone. I promise."

I don't say anything. I just sob against his body. We stay like this for what felt like an eternity. Till I hear his voice. I am extremely out of it, but I hear it as clear as a bell.

"I love you, Sasha. And I promise you; you'll get through this."

End of Flashback.

"Sasha-."

"No Brando…I-."

He sees my tears and frowns. "Shush. It's going to be okay. I promise. " He pulls me close to him and held me in his arms.

Despite our entire situation, I feel a little better. I feel a little safer. And I know I should have never waited to tell him.

###

We talked for a while. It wasn't about anything of consequence. Just something to keep us both awake. Brando mused on how he'd miss Neelix's leola root stew. And I even mentioned how I'd miss Seven's abrasive nature. But I think the thing I'd miss most is getting to see this man's face every day. It got quiet for a moment; he must have been thinking about my last remark. That's when the computer went off.

"Warning. Oxygen level at one hundred four millibars."

I look into Brando's eyes and notice they are closed. A slight panic rises in my stomach. He has to stay awake. "Brando. Come on. Open your eyes."

"Warning. Oxygen level at eighty-seven millibars."

His eyes slowly flutter open and he gives me a smile. "I was having a dream. We finally made it home."

The panic that was inside of me decreases only somewhat. There isn't much time left. For either of us. And there are so many things I never got to tell him. So many things he'll never know. And I can't die without them being said. I just can't.

"Brando. There's something I have to say."

He nods. "Me too. I'm glad the last thing I'll see is you."

I choke back a sob at his words. "I've been a coward about everything. I really have. Especially with everything that really matters.

He frowns. He thought we had gotten past this earlier. "Now you're being a little hard on yourself."

I shook my head. "No. No, I'm not. I'm going to die without a shred of honor. And for the first time in my life that really bothers me. So, I have to tell you something. I-. "

The computer interrupted me, and I sighed.

"Warning. Oxygen level at seventy-one millibars."

"I have to tell you the truth.

"The truth about what? You already told me about the drugs and I'm not mad."

"That's not it." I shake my head again.

"Then what is it? You can tell me anything. You know that."

"I love you. I love you Brando Corbin." There was a long moment of silence. And I start to fear that I shouldn't have said something to him. "Say something Brando."

He laughs causing him to start coughing due to the lack of oxygen. Once his fit was over, he gazes directly into my eyes. "You picked a great time to tell me."

I smile at him and gently rest my head against his. If there weren't two helmets in our way, I'm one hundred percent certain that we would have kissed. So instead, I close my eyes and envision what it would have been like if we had.

Before Brando can respond to my declaration, he notices the sleek shape of an approaching Federation starship reflecting in my helmet. Not just any starship, our starship. Voyager.

Soon a female voice can be heard through the comm system in his suit. "Voyager to Brando Corbin. Brando, do you read me?" When he doesn't answer right away, she tries again. "Respond."

"We're here Captain."

"Prepare to beam aboard."

###

We were immediately beamed to sick to sickbay so the Doctor could tend to us. He was just about to tell us if we were okay to head to our quarters when the Captain and Seven entered the room.

"Sasha, Brando how are you feeling?" Janeway asked.

"You mean considering we were almost blown to smithereens and left to float out in space and die?"

Brando spoke up. "What she means to say is we're fine Captain."

Our leader looked to the Doctor to see if we were in fact okay. Medically speaking of course.

"Aside from some mild oxygen deprivation, they are completely healthy. I don't see why they shouldn't be able to return back to duty after a good night's rest."

"Glad to hear it! Now I know you two need your rest, but I have a few questions for you both."

"Shoot." Brando said.

"Did they give you any indication where they might be headed with the core?"

He shook his head. "No. We tried to get it back by disrupting their tractor beam, but they sent an antimatter pulse back through our particle beam. It caused a hull breach and we had to abandon the ship. Last we saw they were running off with the core."

"Well, we have impulse engines. So that will have to do until we can get the core back. Seven has been in astrometric trying to see if she can find them on sensors but it looks like they're doing a pretty good job to make sure they're not found."

"Well, there has to be something that can be done," I say.

There was a long silence before Seven spoke. "Maybe there is."

"Seven?" Janeway questioned.

"Caatati technology is dependent on thorium isotopes. If they had enough, they could become self-sustaining."

"But we don't have that much thorium to give them." I told her.

"When the Borg assimilated the Caatati, the survivors lost their ability to replicate the isotopes. But I have retained that knowledge. I could design an energy matrix that would produce thorium in large quantities."

I huffed in annoyance. Had she said something sooner maybe Brando and I wouldn't have been stranded in space. "If you've had this knowledge all along, why didn't you say so?"

"I am not accustomed to thinking that way. Borg do not consider giving technology away, only assimilating it."

"And what do you suppose made you consider it now?" The Captain questioned.

"I am not certain."

A hint of a smile grew on Kathryn's face. "Maybe it was just an unexpected act of kindness. Work with Vorik to build the energy matrix, while I convince the Caatati there's a better way out of this. You two I expect to get some rest."

We gave her a nod as she and Seven left to put their plan in motion. Once they were officially gone, I turned to the doctor. "Are we free to go."

"Yes. Just promise me Sasha you'll actually take it easy."

"Don't worry Doc I'll make sure she does."

The hologram gave us a smile as we got up from the biobeds and exited the medical room.

I started to walk down the corridor with Brando not far behind me. Once he caught up to me, he cleared his throat.

"Would you be willing to sit down and maybe talk? We could go to my quarters or y-."

"Yours is fine."

###

"Can I get you something? I could replicate something to eat. Or get you something to drink. I have water."

"Just water is fine."

He gave me a nod and went over to his makeshift wet bar to pour me a glass of water. I walked over to his couch and nervously took a seat. We had said so many things while we were floating out in space. But that was because we thought we were going to die. I know I meant every word I said but he might not have. He needs to know I was being truthful. He needs to know how sorry I am for how I was today. And I need to know if what he said was genuine. As he walked over to me with my water, I cleared my throat.

"Brando…about my behavior towards you earlier...I'm sorry. Truly I am."

I took the water from him and then he sat next to me on the couch. "Hey, it's okay. This day hasn't been all that great. Plus, it's a year since…"

I nod "Yeah. But that's not the only reason why this day is so hard for me."

"Oh?"

He knows my dad had left when I was six years old. But he doesn't know much else. I figure that maybe it was time I tell him. So, he can understand where I am coming from, and how I am feeling. And why this day of the year was always the hardest for me.

"The day he left. My father that is. It was the Day of Honor. And it was my fault. That's why this day is always so hard for me."

"You don't know that."

I started to get emotional. "Yes, I do! The day before, he and my mother got into a terrible argument. I wasn't supposed to be eavesdropping, but it was hard not to be. I heard everything he said to her. And I was so angry with him. When he caught me, I yelled at him." I start to cry. "I told him that if it was so difficult living here, he should leave. So, he did. The next morning, he packed up his bags without a goodbye. One day he was there, and the next, he wasn't. I cried myself to sleep for months after that. Of course, I never told anyone. Then one day, I finally decided it was my fault. But not just because of what I said. But because I looked like a Klingon. I looked like my mother. And I knew that as long as I looked the way I did, no man could ever truly love me. If my father couldn't, why should I expect another man too?"

He gently strokes my cheek with the pad of his thumb. So, this is why she had been so distant with him at times. "Sasha…that couldn't be far from the truth. Being half Klingon makes you unique. It makes you special. It's one of the things I love most about you."

"You say that now-."

"I say it because it's true. I meant what I said out in space before we were beamed aboard the ship. I love you. And I'm always going to love you. No matter your race or how you look. That will never change. You have to believe me."

I choke back a sob. "It's just so hard."

"I know it is. But I'm not going to give up until you realize it."

A small smile brakes out on my face when deep down I finally realize he meant every word he was saying. I felt the urge to kiss him and immediately lock eyes with his lips. Sensing precisely what I want, he leans in and gently takes my cheek in his hand. My eyes look up into his to see he has the same desire I have. Without second-guessing myself, I move forward and press my lips to his. The kiss is soft and slow. Extremely intimate. He doesn't dare take it any farther and neither do I. What we are doing is perfect. He rests his forehead against mine and sighs when we finally pull away.

"It's getting late."

"I don't want to be alone."

"Then don't be. Stay here. Stay here with me."

It takes me a moment, but I nod. We both stood up and made our way over to his bed. Once we reach it, he sits down on what is his side of the bed and begins to take his shoes off. I use this time to take mine off. When we're finished, he pulls back the covers and we climb in. I turn to face him and stare into his ocean blue eyes. Nothing needs to be said and I'm okay with that. He leans in and gives my forehead a kiss before wrapping his arms protectively around me. We stayed like that till we finally fell into a peaceful sleep.