Chapter 6: Refuse

Shikamaru didn't leave a letter for his mother. He didn't leave a letter for his clan. He didn't sleep at home, either, but snuck into the academy, into the teacher's lounge, and slept on the cold couch. Shikamaru lived with his mother because all his money went to helping Kurenai take care of her daughter, Mirai. Mirai was also the daughter of Asuma, his teacher, and sensei, and master. Shikamaru took care of Mirai because he blamed himself for Asuma's death- and he wasn't shy about admitting it. Ino told him to stop- it was inappropriate. Choji helped at first, too, then stopped, then told Shikamaru to stop. Shikamaru didn't stop. Kurenai both needed, and appreciated, his help. Pregnancy had been hard on her, and she wasn't able to go on missions, and she didn't have anyone else in her life. Except, according to Ino, the new man she had over last week. It didn't matter to Shikamaru. When he visited, and handed her an envelope, and when he left, he did so as a shadow- flat and hollow, dark against the wall, black at the table, and silent.

Otto Nara, his cousin, was the only remaining Nara in Konoha that had not stooped to selling drugs; the Nara clan was poorly represented in the war because they choose to make a fortune while others were fighting and dying by selling illegal drugs. The Nara clan had always been formidable, and they had always skirted the line between honest work and easy money, but not Otto- he was a hard worker, with a wife and a young daughter, and he served honorably in the fourth war, and came home to a clan in shambles. He blamed Shikamaru; it was Shikaku's responsibility to keep the clan straight, and when he died, that role fell to Shikamaru. Otto cussed him out, up one side and down another, and Shikamaru had no defense, and no words to say. He left by the front door, and walked home in the shadows.

Three times he had sat on a bench near the village gate, ready to leave. Three times he went back home.

He slept fitfully on the couch, and rose hours before dawn and opened the blinds, and looked at the weather- snow, and heavy clouds, and driving wind. It was two hours before dawn, and he only needed to finish a letter, drop it in the mail, and walk to the gate.

This will be my last letter.

I appreciate you always pushing me to be better- a better ninja, a worthy team captain, even the Hokage. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm done with this. I'm done fighting. I don't have the heart for this anymore- He finished it quickly, and folded the letter, and put it in an envelope, and addressed it. He pulled his coat up, and his vest tight, and left the academy for the post office. It was six, and they just opened. He stepped inside and walked up to the counter. "Express," he said, and laid the envelope on the counter. The envelope was heavier than it should've been- it felt like he was laying down a metal plate instead of simple paper. Sorrow is heavier than we think sometimes.

The postboy took it, looked at it, and whistled. He knew that name. "Express costs more right now- holidays."

"Fine."

"Sixty-five," the boy said, and Shikamaru was stunned for a second, then laid down the money.

He went to the gate and waited in the snow for nearly two hours. Hinata joined him around eight, and Naruto, talking to Sasuke and Sakura, followed behind by ten minutes. He had a large pack on his back, and both Sasuke and Sakura were dressed for the cold. They watched as he hugged Sakura, then avoided Sasuke's fist bump and hugged him. Sasuke kinda hugged back, and shoved him away.

It should take nearly a week to reach Amegakure, but Naruto was pushing his Team to move faster- run faster, jump from tree limb to tree limb faster, take shorter breaks, and at the pace they were going they would make it in half that time, assuming Shikamaru and Hinata did not die from exhaustion, and at the point where they could go no further- having run at full speed for half the day, Naruto stopped, and made a shadow clone, to carry Shikamaru. He argued- Hinata didn't. Naruto scooped her up, again holding her by her butt, and she put her arms around his neck. Shikamaru complied, and rode piggy-back on the clone's back. Then Naruto and his clone began running full speed, on top of the snow, not leaving a single track. To say Shikamaru was impressed would be an understatement. Naruto had made shadow clones, already a forbidden jutsu, with no hand sign, no words, and this clone had enough chakra and chakra control to run full speed on top of the snow, silently, leaving no trace. To his knowledge no other ninja could do this.

Hinata relaxed, and adjusted herself against him. She was close enough to smell him, and she inhaled- he smelled like a forest, or like a warm afternoon and an old book. His smell was intoxicating; she so badly wanted to bury her nose against his bare chest, or up against his neck, and fall asleep. She found herself snuggling against him without intending to- she realized she was squeezing his muscles, and rubbing his chest, and stopped herself. He was carrying her, protecting her, and concerned about her, and the warmth she felt from that calmed her. She wanted to be strong enough to be respected, and to protect herself, but she also loved the attention he was giving her. She shut her eyes and buried her face in his neck and held tightly, and replayed his words to her father, and replayed that compliment on the cliff- very beautiful eyes.

It was many hours later, approaching a gray, opaque sunset, when Shikamaru saw something out of the corner of his eye. "Naruto, over there." Naruto carried them over to a campsite that concerned them- a tent, a firepit, and a leaf headband on a stone. No bodies, and nothing else left behind, so they followed a trail to a small clearing near a stream where large rocks sat frozen on the banks. The only plants left above the snow were cattails, and trees. Ice crept from the rocks into the stream, little white fingers choking, and squeezing down.

Naruto stopped, put Shikamaru down, and then that clone disappeared. He stood breathing a minute, in and out, slowing down, then adjusted Hinata, so that he had a better grip on her. Her eyes were shut.

"Are you going to put her down?" Shikamaru asked. It was becoming apparent, and fast, that these two were getting closer and closer, and it wasn't going to be good- for Naruto, Hinata, or the Leaf- one of the three, maybe all three. But it had occurred to Shikamaru- if Naruto became a criminal, and Shikamaru followed him, and was, thus, declared a criminal, too, his clan would be placed under heavy guard. That was something, at least. That did address one single concern Otto had.

Hinata didn't say anything. She held tight. She didn't care if he held her all night.

Naruto held her a minute longer, catching his breath, then let her out of his arm, and she let go of his neck, and blushed.

He was exhausted. "Hinata," he said, breathing heavily, "Can you check again please?"

She had been using her bakyugan periodically and had seen no sign of anyone trailing them. She didn't know of many ninja who had the endurance to trail them, not at that speed for that long. She had seen bands of migrants, and tent settlements here and there, but no signs of any ninja. She obliged, and looked as far as she could, and saw no one, and no trace of anyone. "No one is following us."

"I don't see how anyone could." Shikamaru stretched out his legs and back. "Is this how the old Team 7 usually did their missions?" he asked Naruto.

Naruto grinned. "No," he huffed. "Sasuke would never let me…carry him, and Sakura probably wouldn't…either." His black cloak was wet with sweat around the collar. He took it off and draped it over a tree limb.

"Naruto, you rest while Hinata and I find some food and make camp."

Naruto was worried about the genjutsu, but knew he could break himself out, and knew if Hinata was hit she would call to him, and he would hear and rescue her, but he was worried about Shikamaru, and offered to go with him, and Shikamaru said no- I'm fine.

At some point while gathering wood, Hinata approached Shikamaru at the stream and asked him for some time alone with Naruto, saying she needed to speak to him privately. Shikamaru shrugged, and kept fishing. Good, he thought, watching as she walked back to their camp. He needs to know.

She quietly laid the damp logs on the ground, and back and forth two more times. She built a fire with pine branches, lichens, small damp sticks, larger damp sticks, and so on until the fire was feeding itself. Naruto was asleep, and she felt bad for waking him, but did anyway, shaking his shoulder.

"Huh? What is it?" he asked, blinking.

The ground was covered in inches of snow, so she sat across from him on the thick branch of a large fallen tree limb. The fire was close enough to feel its warmth.

"Naruto, I…" she started, but had a hard time continuing. She looked at him. Did he need the fire at all? The cold, not just the air, but the snow, and shadows as day slid to night, and the ice, seemed to have no effect on him. But she was certain her next words would. And she couldn't say them.

"What is it?" he asked, sitting up.

"I'm…I've…"

When Naruto was younger he honestly thought Hinata was too shy and weak to amount to much. It had taken years for him to realize how valuable she was, not just as a ninja, but as a friend as well. He knew there was more than just friendship in his heart for her, but in truth, even if he admitted that he liked her, loved her even- she was a clan princess, and he doubted, no matter what he did now or in the future, he would ever be good enough for her. What did he know of clans and estates and mansions? And who was he to tell anyone what to do? His apartment, his life, his wrinkled clothes, his messy hair- all a hovel. Hinabi had been spot on. Even his home in the south was just an open, undecorated room. But beyond attraction, aside from wanting to be close to her, and liking her, he respected and appreciated her, and did not want her to feel so embarrassed that she couldn't talk to him. He stood and yawned a little and sat on the same log, his back to hers.

"What…what are you doing?"

"I don't know. I thought, maybe, it might be easier for you to talk to me this way."

He wasn't wrong. It was easier, but she also did not want to give in to her weakness; she wanted to be honest with him. "No, I want…I want to look at you."

He stood, his right side and missing arm facing the fire. He helped her to her feet with his left hand.

She looked up into his blue eyes, but could not hold them for long. She looked down. "I've been assigned to-to-to the Branch family. I… wanted you-"

"What?" He took a step back as if slapped. She could've punched him and not staggered him as much. "Hinata, you have to refuse."

What? How could she refuse? How could he suggest she refuse? What other option did she have, other than allowing Hinabi to go in her place. "It was either me or Hinabi, Naruto. I-"

He grabbed her shoulder and stared down at her. "It doesn't have to be either of you. Refuse." There was no hesitation, no indecisiveness; his eyes were as sharp as daggers, and just as deadly.

She knew this would be his response, and she knew it wasn't possible for it to be hers. She was bound by a fate that had repeated itself for generations in her clan. She felt tears in her eyes and backed away from him and hid her face. She did not want to cry in front of him.

Naruto didn't know what to do. How could she agree to this? Just refuse. It's not like the clan would track her down and kill her. He could not figure out any other appropriate response. How much value does being in a clan actually offer? He wouldn't want to be a Hyuga, or a Nara. Uzumaki wasn't all that better, and there was only one of him. Anger rose in his throat, and his chest, followed by a fury any nine-tailed fox would be proud of. He had to control himself. He tried.

"Naruto," she said, putting her tears away. "My life isn't…isn't like yours. I can't just…I can't just refuse this and refuse that. I can't…I can't speak to the Hokage, or my father, the way… the way you do."

"Why not?" His anger was leaking out, in her direction. "Tell your father no." It was in his voice.

This stunned her. Did he not understand that she had no control over this? Her father's younger brother served in the branch family; how was this different? "What do you mean tell my… tell my father no? Do you think it's that easy?"

This question made him even angrier. "Yes, it's that easy." He clinched his jaw and felt like a demon fox was crawling up his back. That damn Hyuga clan.

"And would you refuse Kakashi, or Sasuke? Would you refuse to help Sakura if she asked?"

"What does Sakura have to do with this?"

Shikamaru had come back, and was close enough to hear, but kept his distance.

Hinata bristled at his stubbornness. "Would you refuse to help her?"

"No. I would help any of my friends, and you know it."

"So what makes you think it's…it's any different for me? You can't… can't refuse Sakura or Kakashi, but you expect me to… to refuse my father and my clan?"

"Those aren't the same thing."

"They are the same thing! They're the exact same thing, except instead of a …of a friend it's my father, and instead of …of you disappointing little Sakura, I would be…I would be disappointing my entire family and clan."

Why was she pulling Sakura into this? "They're not the same thing, Hinata. Have you even tried talking to your father? You're ok going to the branch family and having to do what that bastard Tokuma tells you to?"

"No, I'm not ok with it! I'm sca-" she cut herself off with guillotine speed and accuracy, afraid of speaking the truth and the damage it could cause. She realized that he could not understand her, because he was strong, and fearless, and immeasurable; compared to her, who was weak and inept and measured by the cold bars of fate she had no hope of escaping. She knew it in her heart. It would've been better if he had simply kidnapped her, and given her no choice in the matter. Much like being an academy instructor. Much like being a daughter, or a ninja, or a valuable member of the Hyuga clan, or a competent team member. Fate had her by the throat, crushing her, which seemed to anger him, and his anger was not the response she needed. She needed help, advice, compassion, and his protection- not anger. She could not fight fate and his anger at the same time. "I'm… sorry," she said, and turned away.

Naruto wasn't done, and was about to say more, just as Shikamaru came back, and put his hand on his shoulder and stopped him. "Come help."

Naruto growled and looked at her back- her coat, and black hair. That bastard Tokuma, and that damned clan of hers. He should've kicked him through the wall. Naruto was growling, and both Hinata and Shikamaru heard it clearly- like thunder rumbling in his chest. He snatched the fish out of Shikamaru's hand and glared at him.

"I didn't do anything, so knock it off," Shikamaru said, and snatched the fish back. "Find a flat rock, and clean it off, and put it in the fire," he ordered.

Naruto did as instructed while Shikamaru cleaned the fish.

Hinata had her back turned to them both the entire time they cooked. Shikamaru also took some dried fruit from his pack.

She didn't want to argue with him, or fight with him, or make him mad. For her, whatever happened on this mission ended with the same problem- being sent to the Branch, and the arranged marriage. Her only real option was to run away, but if she did that Hinabi would be in danger. And even if she took his hand and never let go, that didn't protect Hinabi. And she couldn't ask him to break the arranged marriage- that would put him at odds with the Leaf and the Stone, maybe declared a criminal by both, depending.

"Hinata," Shikamaru said. "Here."

She turned, and took some fish on a small metal tray, and some dried fruit. "Thank…thank you," she said, quietly.

They ate in silence as the cold evening crouched around their feet.

Shikamaru noticed Naruto rubbed his chest once, and his legs. He had done the same thing last night- they had spent time at a bar, talking about the Nara clan. Though Naruto didn't have much by way of advice, he offered to help any way he could, and apologized for being standoffish- it was to try and protect Shikamaru. So what to do about the Nara clan? What could he do, but leave, and disassociate, or attack them, and control them with violence. For Naruto it was an easy choice- he had already left. For Shikamaru, not so much. His father would be disappointed that he couldn't think of a better solution than running away, and there were more reasons than just his clan to stay. And as they talked last night, Shikamaru had noticed- he rubbed his chest, and his thigh, as if his bones hurt. "You ok? Cold?"

"Not really," he answered.

Shikamaru noticed he didn't answer the first question. Or maybe he answered both at the same time. "How can you not be?"

"It's a lot colder to the north. I think I'm getting used to it."

"Tell me about the north."

Naruto sighed, and glanced at Hinata. She was looking down. That god damn clan, he thought. They should go back, and he should kick the door down of her father's estate, and then kick all their teeth in, for even thinking of sending Hinata or Hinabi to the branch family. If this wasn't a cause for protection he didn't know what was. What in the hell was wrong with her clan? Why even have a branch family and curse marks? The growling started again, in his chest.

Shikamaru knew that growl was scaring Hinata, and needed to refocus him. "Well?"

The growl ran into a sigh, and he pulled his anger back- it was the nine-tails anger as well: at Hinata's mistreatment. "People are dying. We're not sure how."

"What do you mean?"

Naruto had spent three full weeks in the north, and they had been three damn painful weeks. "There's rats, and ravens, and very large wolves, and bears, and two-headed elk," he said. It was the wolves that were the real problem, at least as far as he was concerned. "Some are dying because of those. But some are also just simply freezing to death. We don't know about the rest- we assume they're dead too- they have to be. Maybe some fled, but… we doubt it."

"None of that makes any sense."

Naruto didn't elaborate. He stood and walked away from them to the stream and cleaned the metal tray and shook the water off. It was cold enough that small water droplets started to freeze on the metal instantly. He leaned over and dipped his face in the freezing water, and wiped it off with his hands, then got handfuls of water and drank, and then walked back to the fire.

"You said some are freezing to death- they don't have wood to burn for fires?" Shikamaru asked when he returned.

"They do, but they let the fires die, and then they die."

"On purpose?" Hinata asked. She wasn't looking at him.

"It seems on purpose. Village after village- all you find are rats, and spiders, and ravens, and dead people- their eyes gone, frozen to death."

"That's it? Nothing else?"

"Is that not enough for you?"

He shook his head. "That's not what I meant. No other clues as to what's going on?"

Naruto looked at his feet- black boots, old, worn, dirty. Then he looked at Hinata's feet- much nicer boots, new, clean, shiny. He looked back at Shikamaru. "Ghosts. The villages are full of ghosts. And the adults are gone. All that's left are the bodies of the old, and the young. And if you fall asleep, you will have the worst nightmares you've ever had."

None of that made any sense either.

The fire crackled and the night sunk into the snow around them. "Ghosts?" Hinata asked.

"Yeah. I know that sounds odd, but-" As if on cue a tree feel in the distance, in the dark, crashing to the ground, under the persistent blanket of snow. Hinata jumped.

Shikamaru thought about this for a minute, and pushed part of a log into the fire, kicking embers into the silhouette branches above them. So what were they actually doing then? What was the goal here? Trying to find the person hitting them with the genjutsu, saving Hyuga, tracking the God Tree, or saving random people to the north? The genjutsu seemed like the most pressing problem, followed by the Got Tree remnants. Given that nothing Naruto had said related to either of those problems, he lowered his eyes, and asked a question he already knew the answer to: "It's nice and all for you and Sasuke to care about the people to the north, but why go to this much trouble?"

Naruto looked at him, then Hinata, who was still looking down, and away. "It's coming south. There's a spot on the north side of the Land of Lightning where you can kind of see this… wall. It's not as sharp in other places. And I'm telling you now- people are dead north of that line. Imagine what it looks like to see a little snow coming down, and then a line from the sky to the ground where a whole lot of snow is coming down- it's not a solid line, but you can see it. You think the weather is bad here- you think it's cold here-" Naruto shook his head. This wasn't cold. Yet. "You cross that line, and then you'll know what cold is. That wall is moving south, Shik. We've tried to stop it; we've tried taking care of people after it's passed. The best we've been able to do is evacuate people, but not many want to leave their homes… until it's nearly too late. There's also an army on the north end of the Land of Lightning, in front of that line, moving south. But we don't think it's the army that's killing villagers."

Wow that was a lot. Hinata looked up at him.

That was a lot for Shikamaru, as well. Many troubling statements and implications in those sentences. "You've seen an army in the Land of Lightning?"

"Yes."

"Why hasn't anything been said? Why would the Land of Lightning not report such a thing?"

"How do you know they've not?" Naruto asked, holding his gaze. "How do you know Tsunade hasn't received reports?"

Shikamaru didn't know. "How big was the army? What do you know about them?"

"Not much- the weather was very bad when we saw them. One thousand, maybe two thousand soldiers. We fought a few- the soldiers are just commoners armed with swords. Most chounin could win against them. But there's a lot of them. And mixed in with them were stone ninja- strong. No chounin would win against them."

"You're telling me ninja from the Stone are part of an army attacking the Land of Lightning, and the Cloud?"

"Were part of an army."

Implying that him and Sasuke dispatched them. Why would they do that, and involve themselves in the affairs of other nations? Especially if they didn't need to. Shikamaru thought better of asking. "I still think this would've been reported by now," he said, wondering how it was possible stone ninja were attacking anyone, how an advancing army from the north had gone completely unreported, and how small hunting and fishing villages, who made their livelihood on trade, could be wiped out, and the nations not notice the decline in trade. Then it occurred to him- the price to mail that letter was significantly higher, implying inflation, implying stifled or reduced trade. He had noticed food prices were going up quite quickly, too.

"Shikamaru- tell me why, when Sasuke and I told Tsunade, and begged her to let us take her, and show her, she refused? Not just refused, but ridiculed us, and accused us of trying to kidnap her. Why hasn't that stupid woman pulled ninja away from the God Tree to investigate the missing Hyuga?"

"She sent a team to-"

"Yeah, Kosuke and Tenten. That's not really a team I would want to rely on if my clan was being kidnapped and killed," Naruto said.

Shikamaru thought the same. Any other time a village lost so many of one clan they would assemble multiple strong teams, not their weakest.

"You think the missing Hyuga, and the God Tree, and the North are all related?"

"Probably. Sasuke thinks there's three of them, and thinks they're all related."

Hinata didn't want to speak; she didn't want to be misinterpreted, or to feel weak and inept, or to have to stutter to be heard. She didn't know what actual value she had here. Ghosts and blizzards and her clan. "I…maybe I should…go back," Hinata said, still looking down. "I don't know…"

"No," Naruto answered, sharply. "Not without me. Don't you forget your promise to me."

She glanced up at him, startled at the anger in his voice. His eyes were angry. She looked down and away, afraid, and upset.

"Naruto, I don't know if you were serious or not, but you shouldn't keep her against her will."

"So send her back to die in the snow? To be slapped by Tokuma? To have a curse mark slapped across her forehead. Fuck no, Shikamaru, and fuck the Leaf. Get mad at me if you want. I don't give a shit. And I goddamn guarantee you this- if we go back I'm kicking Tokuma's teeth through the back of his fucking skull. That son of a bitch is a dead man."

She looked at him, then back down. She didn't know what to do, or say, but didn't like being on the receiving end of his anger. She dug through her pack, and pulled a rolled up cot and blanket free, and started clearing a spot to sleep. Shikamaru and Naruto talked behind her, and she paid no attention.