Titans: Elemental

Chapter 27: Mad Mod, Part 1

Dick sits up after a moment with a huge gasp!

Dick, "huh?"

This place is a large, partially lit atrium with several balconies running around the walls, as well as paintings hung everywhere. Dick is sitting in a polished wooden chair. His wrists and ankles are securely bound to it; Dick struggles against the restraints, but cannot get loose. Near him is Starfire in a chair of her own. Now the lights have fully come up to show one Titan after another also clamped into chairs. They are all half-unconscious, but come around with assorted groans, and each has an additional binding. Red energy rings at Starfire and Blaclfire's wrists, steel straps over Vic's chest, a white energy band encircling Raven's, giant rubber bands on Beast Boy's, Jack's staff was strapped to the back of his chair, where he couldn't teach it while he was bound. The same for Rose's staff and sword.

Vic, "what?"

Rose, "how the-?"

BB, "huh? Am I the only one who has no idea where we are?"

"Why, you're right where you belong, my duckies."

Beast Boy gasps upon hearing these words. They all see a man standing at an open set of double doors on one balcony. Light from the other side obscures him for the moment, but a cane can be seen in one hand. This is Mad Mod.

Mad Mod, "you're in school!"

He leaps onto the banister of a nearby staircase and slides down it, giving a full view of himself. Early forties; red hair in a Beatle cut with mutton chop sideburns; small rectangular sunglasses; sportcoat with the design of the British Union Jack flag, a black shirt, white kerchief tied at the neck, a pair of white pants, brown shoes with black socks. The cane is topped with a large ruby. Landing near Starfire, he twirls it in one hand.

Mad Mod, "that's right, lads and loveys. You're the only students at Mad Mod's Institute for Bratty Young Do-Gooders", he tosses the cane high, to his other hand, and holds it out, "and it's high time someone taught you sprogs a lesson."

BB, "uh-oh."

Jack, "this ain't gonna be a normal day, is it?"

Mad Mod starts strolling leisurely towards the Titans, the ruby on his cane is blazing. As he nears the Titans, he raises the stick for a swing.

Dick, "Titans! Move!"

Rose, "we're trying!"

The others are unable to break their bonds; Beast Boy cycles through lizard and cobra forms as he strains against his. Jack desperately tries to reach his staff. Mad Mod is now prancing around at the foot of the stairs and twirling the cane.

Starfire, "my starbolts are useless!"

Blackfire, "so are mine!"

Mad Mod, "specially designed chairs, love. Can't have those nasty superpowers disrupting my lecture now, can I?"

He leans closer to Starfire as Blackfire growls in anger.

Dick, "get away from her!"

The bizarre Brit straightens up and glances over at Dick, and thrusts the cane into his face. Its ruby flares up anew, more intensely, and Dick recoils from the glare as far as he can.

Mad Mod, "now don't get your knickers in a twist, my little snot. I didn't go to all the trouble of building this school and filling your tower with knockout gas just to finish you off lickety-split."

Jack muttered, "clearly not."

Raven, "then what do you want?"

Mad Mod, "just what I said, dearie", he leans into her face, "to teach you lot a lesson", he turns away and scratches himself, "yes, I've been watching you children misbehave. And I hate misbehaving children."

He points the cane off to one side. A picture of him, done in the style of Andy Warhol, turns around to show Vic, Jack and Raven beating on Thunder and Lightning.

Mad Mod, "fighting crime."

We see a second such painting, which swivels to show Dick, Rose and Starfire cradling kittens they have rescued from a blazing fire behind them.

Mad Mod, "saving lives."

A third picture turns to show BB, as a dog, pulling down Plasmus' shorts as Blackfire holds a bucket of ice over it.

Mad Mod, "interfering with the plans of hardworking villains. Why, you lot are nothing but a bunch of troublemakers!"

Jack starts making a loopy face before Mad Mod turns back to them.

As he points the cane around, each in turn reacts with varied expressions of fury.

Mad Mod, "but you'll learn your place soon enough. You see, I'm older than you, so I'm bigger, badder, and better."

Vic, "say wh-?!"

Vic is bashed with the cane.

Vic, "OW!"

Rose muttered, "this guy's a loon."

BB whispered, "watch it Rose, my mama's half loon."

Jack, "really?"

BB, "no, not really, I can't back that up."

Mad Mod, "shut it! You're in my world now. And you won't be getting out 'til you've learned some proper respect."

Dick, "we will get out. And when we do-"

A gesture of the cane is followed by the ringing of a school bell.

Mad Mod, "oh, dear, there's the bell, my duckies. Off to class!"

The floor tile under each chair opens like a trapdoor, dumping each Titan in their chairs out of sight.

….

Dick drops into view and makes a perfect four-point landing in the middle of the floor. The chair rotates until it is facing a large blackboard. The side walls are blank, the board is on the end wall, and two busts of Mad Mod flank it. The man's face is quickly drawn on in chalk as the board speaks with his voice.

Blackboard, "now how can I teach you anything if you won't sit still and listen?"

A wooden hand extends from the chair's top edge and grabs Dick's head.

Dick, "huh?"

He tries to wriggle out of the grasp, but with no luck; it is pulling back on his scalp, forcing his eyes wide open.

Blackboard, "one of my hypno screens ought to get your attention and it'll erase everything in your brain as well."

On the end of this, the chalk face swirls away and the board is replaced by a pulsating pattern of concentric black and white rings. His laughter rings in the room.

Dick, "can't let him hypnotize me…. Got to stay focused…."

His eyes are pulled even wider open, and the pattern starts to affect him. The rings are flashing across every wall. With great effort, Dick manages to tip the chair onto its side, breaking some of the wood from one of its arms. Underneath, his wrist is held down with a metal clamp. He flicks a small lockpick out from one finger of that glove, uses it to free that arm in short order, and tears the wooden hand from the chair top. One hard throw cracks the hypno screen wall and puts it out of business; now he sets about freeing his other three limbs. The other walls have returned to normal, and Mad Mod's voice makes itself heard over a hidden speaker.

Mad Mod, "naughty snotty. If you're gonna destroy school property, school property's gonna destroy you."

Dick, "whoa."

On the ruined wall, something very large starts to push through; it is a fabric screen, and it pulls back to show an enormous missile ready to launch.

Mad Mod, "right, then. Count along with Moddy."

One of the two busts extends laser muzzles from its eyes and spinning blades on jointed arms from its ears.

Mad Mod, "ten…. Nine…. Eight…. Seven…. Six…. Five…. Four…. Three…. Two…. One!"

During the countdown, the bust and its identically aimed counterpart move in and fire at Dick. He rolls across the floor and hurls himself at them. He quickly hides behind one and ducks as the other fires and blows its head off. He pushes the remains aside, gives the missile a good long look, and bolts to the ruined wall. Finally, he dives through the cloth to make his escape.

We see Dick, now going full tilt down a tunnel done out in the checkerboard pattern. The weapon roars up behind him, entering through a trick black panel, and detonates with a blast that throws him against the wall. He stands up and dusts himself off before polishing the bird symbol on his chest.

Dick, "there goes my shot at perfect attendance."

Mad Mod, "don't be so sure, my little duckie."

Dick looks down the tunnel. Sure enough, there Mad Mod is down the way, now wearing a dark suit.

Mad Mod, "you may be out of the classroom, but class is never dismissed."

He goes up the side, so that he is standing upside down on the top surface, and runs at Dick. He passes overhead as Dick jumps up in a vain attempt to grab him.

Mad Mod, "next lesson: physics!"

Dick, "huh?"

Mad Mod, "what goes up, stays up!"

Dick, "until I take it down!"

The chase begins, ranging through a network of staircases and arches that connect floor to floor. We follow them through a trick of perspective and design, the checkerboard ceiling has more stairs coming down from it. M. C. Escher would be proud! Now they move into a region of black and white cubes, Dick right side up and Mad Mod upside down, approaching from opposite directions. The whole thing turns 180 degrees to reverse their positions, and the Titan tumbles to his enemy's level with a yell and a thud. Mad Mod hops over him and runs off.

The chase resumes, now against a field partially filled with checkerboard tiling. The upper portion is filled with vertical black and white stripes; the overall effect is of a half-woven basket. Mad Mod and Dick dash along the interface between the two regions, disappearing briefly behind each black stripe. Suddenly, the redhead doubles back and descends a staircase hidden among the squares, and Dick stays hot on his heels. Now they move into an area consisting of two side-by-side sets of concentric squares. Mad Mod runs into the left set, a tunnel, and does a sharp turn into one of the white bands. When Dick tries to follow, he runs flat into a wall.

Dick, "how did he-?"

Mad Mod emerges on the right and runs while blowing a raspberry back at him. Dick gives chase. Dick enters another room. A loud whistle draws his attention; he sees the crazed Englishman at the top of that long staircase seen earlier. They are back in the main atrium.

Mad Mod, "you may as well chuck in the sponge, laddie! You can't catch the likes of me!"

Determined to prove him wrong, Dick charges toward the stairs and bounds up the banisters. A wave of the cane, and we see him running full tilt, his feet pounding up the steps. We then see that the staircases have become long escalators; he is on the down one and getting nowhere fast. Mad Mod stands at the top, against a black-and-white sunburst, but this soon gives way to the normal wall.

Mad Mod, "now what did I tell you? Children today won't listen to their betters! Have to learn everything the hard-"

Before he can finish, Dick throws a wingding, whirling it through the air. It ricochets off the railing in front of the Cockney crackpot.

Mad Mod, "hey, oy! No throwing things while the teacher is talking!"

Dick fires a grappling hook that embeds itself in the wall above the doorway as Mad Mod runs out, then reels himself up to the landing. Dick bursts through the door and stands up for a look around. One eyebrow jumps in complete surprise. He has come out in an atrium that looks exactly like the one he just left.

Dick, "what?! You've gotta be kidding me!"

That's when he hears Starfire, "NOOOO!"

He then hears Blackfire, "LET! US! GO!"

Dick, "Starfire! Blackfire!"

….

We see a set of very tall library shelves, with a ladder set up to reach the topmost levels of one of them. Dick climbs this, seeing a maze of shelves stretching as far as the eye can see, and a checkerboard ceiling over the lot.

Starfire, "NOOOOOOOOO!"

Blackfire, "don't make me burn your ears off!"

Across the library, we see another hypno screen has been set up among the stacks. The display is shaped like a giant book, propped up and open, and rows of desks have been set up before it. Starfire and Blackfire are at the rear center, thrashing from side to side with their eyes tightly shut, but two thin arms reach from the top of both chairs.

Starfire, "I will not read your book of meanness and swirls!"

Blackfire, "I swear, you won't be able to hear for the rest of your life!"

The arms grab their heads and force them to face front.

Mad Mod, "now, now, loves, it's for your own good."

They begin to succumb.

Mad Mod, "nothing teaches discipline and respect like a brain-erasing trance."

They close their eyes at the end of this, but the wooden fingers soon pry them back open; they gasp in shock and look upward. Up at the ceiling, a large section of tiling opens to reveal a giant rubber, "OVERDUE", stamp.

Mad Mod, "besides, if you two won't stop squirming…."

It pistons down and stamps the floor, crushing a few desks to splinters.

Mad Mod, "... I won't stop squashing!"

The stamp moves closer and cycles again. Gasping in sheer terror, Starfire and Blackfire renew their efforts to get out of the chairs, their heads have been released. Now it comes down right in front of them, throwing bits of wood in their faces. As they stare, horrified, the string of huge rubber letters positions itself directly over their heads and hurtles down. They both let go screams of fear!

Dick dives across the floor and plows them out of the way a split second before OVERDUE is stamped into the tiles. The chairs have been knocked onto their backs, and Dick pulls out a tiny welding torch to attack the energy restraints that have been neutralizing their starbolts.

Starfire, "are all the schools on your planet this horrible?"

Blackfire, "because if so, I ain't ever setting foot in one!"

He frees them. But a new problem arises as books come off the shelves and start flapping toward the three Titans like giant bats.

Dick, "come on!"

Starfire is yanked up with a gasp, while Blackfire simply runs after them. A moment later, some of the books hit the chairs and explode, blowing them to bits. They reach a set of shelves and head straight up; Dick climbing, Starfire and Blackfire flying, as more volumes hit and detonate all around them. Dick is jarred loose by the blasts and falls screaming back toward the attacking literature, but Blackfire and Starfire make a last-second grab and haul him up.

They leap along the tops of the shelves, avoiding the oncoming books while the sisters shoot one or two down. We see a closed door: Library, "quiet Please", set in a wall that is tiled with concentric squares. The sisters and Dick burst out, slam it shut, and lean on it with their full weight; a final, hefty explosion from the other side nearly pushes it open again. Smoke drifts out through the cracks as Dick strides away and they follow.

Starfire, "Dick! I wish to thank you for rescuing us from-"

Dick, "don't thank me yet. Mad Mod still has us right where he wants us. I know we could take him if we could just get our hands on him. But every time we get out of one trap…."

Busts roll up behind them.

Starfire turns to look behind and gasps upon seeing them. The sunglasses on a sculpture on one slide up the forehead and a missile pops out of the nose; spinning blades emerge from another's ears; a third's jaw opens to reveal a stun gun; the hair of the last rises to show a cannon inside the head.

Dick, "... There's another one waiting."

Blackfire, "if we ever find this guy, remind me to kick him!"

Dick gets ready for a little kung fu action, but Starfire and Blackfire think better of it when a cannon shot lands too close for comfort. They yank him off into one of the square patterns.

Mad Mod, "run, my duckies! Run all you like, but you'll never get out!"

On the end of this the area turns 90 degrees to frame them now moving from bottom to top, then moves ahead to show a spiraling pattern of concentric squares just ahead. They reach it and tumble screaming toward its center; gravity has just hiccuped again!

….

I'm another room, near ceiling level; the tiles are all white here and marked with the symbols of the periodic table. Some giant models of molecules have been set up as well. As the yells grow louder, the tile marked for Zirconium flips open and the three teens drop out. Dick tumbles along the floor while Starfire and Blackfire bring themselves to a midair stop above him. Giant beakers and test tubes filled with solutions line the walls, along with a microscope and a Bunsen burner, we have just reached the chemistry lab. They now head further into the room; as they pass behind each container of chemicals, their image distorts in a different way.

Mad Mod, "it's no good procrastinating, really, because sooner or later, you'll both end up like him."

Starfire gasps.

Dick, "Beast Boy!"

We see the end of the lab, where a few desks have been set up. A head can just be seen over the top of a chair that is front and center, positioned for a full view of the overhead projector screen that hangs down from the ceiling at an angle. The hypnotic pattern is playing across it. It is indeed BB, wearing a dunce cap, fully under the screen's spell, drool running down his chin, babbling incoherently. Dick, Blackfire and Starfire move in for a look.

They then see that Rose is trapped in a large beaker next to him!

Blackfire, "Rose? Why are you in that?"

Rose, "since I've only got one eye, the hypnosis wasn't effective on me, so he put me in here to watch Beast Boy succumb to it."

Mad Mod, "ah, yeah. A model student, that one. Not like the pirate duckie. Lovely. Sits there, quietly, never thinks about misbehaving, matter of fact, he never thinks at all! Hahahaha!"

Starfire, "Beast Boy! Awaken", she waves in his face and removes the cap; Dick uses his torch, "your friends are here! Beast Boy?"

Blackfire quickly smashes the beaker, freeing Rose.

Starfire snaps her fingers; no good. Now she steps to the screen and warms up a starbolt to knock it out, but Dick stops her before she can fire.

Dick, "wait! Trust me."

The test tubes blow their stoppers and all the chemicals in the place boil over. Colorful toxic slop spreads across the floor, dissolving desks as it reaches them. Dick frees Beast Boy from the chair and hands him to Starfire.

Dick, "here's your hall pass. Meet you outside."

Blackfire grabs onto Rose as Starfire holds onto BB.

They fly away, and Dick leapfrogs along the disintegrating desks to traverse the lab. Riding one like a surfboard, he approaches the door, where the others have already made it out, and vaults to one of the molecular models and then over to them. He ducks through the door and slams it shut.

….

A few moments later, we see the others trying to snap BB out of his hypnosis.

They are back in the main atrium.

Starfire, "Beast Boy?"

BB sits crumpled on the floor, with Starfire and the others looking down concernedly, and he is now drooling all over his clothes.

Starfire, "it is I, Starfire, your friend. Please! Speak to me! Beast Boy? Beast Boy?"

She knocks on his head a couple of times, then sucks in a huge breath.

Dick covers his ears as Blackfire covers Rose's.

Starfire, "BEEEEEEAAAAAASSSSSSTTTTTT BOOOOOOYYYYYY!"

Dick is left a bit stunned when the yell finally dies away, but Beast Boy just drools and babbles some more before keeling over.

Dick, "ah, Star? I don't think that's working."

Rose, "captain obvious is here."

Starfire, "but we must do something or he will remain this way forever."

Beast Boy sits up and wavers a bit, and tumbles against her midsection. A door is heard opening; she pushes him away.

Dick, "Mad Mod! Come on!"

He hustles away. Starfire, not quite sure of the proper hygiene protocol to follow here, yanks Beast Boy after him, with the other two close behind. The five end up huddled behind the staircase.

Dick, "we'll hide here and then take him by surprise."

A little bit of random mumbling gets on his nerves very quickly.

Dick, "any way to keep him quiet?"

Starfire claps a hand over the slack mouth and shudders mightily as drool oozes through her fingers.

Rose snickers, but Blackfire covers her mouth as well.

Blackfire, "stop snickering. And if you lick my hand, you'll be sorry."

Dick peeks out, sees a shadow approaching, then ducks back briefly and leaps out with Starfire and the others right behind him.

Dick's foot extended for a kick, the sisters hands ready to fire starbolts, Vic's sonic cannon, Rose's staff ready to strike, Jack's hands engulfed in fire and ice, a large black hand projected by Raven.

There is a white flash, which clears to leave the seven Titans ready to unload on each other; Raven has suspended Dick in midair.

Starfire, "Victor! Jack! Raven! Oh, how glad we are to see you!"

Vic disarms; Dick is set down.

Dick, "this place is making me crazy!"

Vic, "tell me about it. Mad Mod's wacked-out computer lab nearly crashed my hard drive."

Starfire, "where did our captor send you, Raven?"

Raven opens her cloak partially and reveals, instead of her usual black outfit, a white jersey with a large zero on its front.

Her usual blue wristbands have been replaced with white ones, the jersey has Mad Mod's name along with the zero, and she wears shorts, knee pads, and athletic shoes.

Raven, "gym."

Jack, "he tried putting me through health class, but my magic kept me from getting brain-washed. It took a lot of effort to get my staff back. I found Raven after that. And I gotta say, I can't wait until that jersey is off of her."

Raven, "the feeling is mutual."

Vic, "anybody seen BB?"

Babbling from the ground makes them all look down towards the floor. He is slithering along like an inchworm, with copious amounts of saliva lubricating the path.

Dick, "Mad Mod's hypno screens. We can't snap him out of it. We've tried everything."

Vic, "did you try this?"

Vic leans down, pulls one ear wide open, and fires a major-league belch directly into it. Beast Boy laughs, shaken out of his trance.

BB, "nice one! Uh…. How did I get here and why am I covered in drool?"

Starfire, "wonderful! Now we need only to locate an exit."

Vic breaks out his cannon.

Vic, "or just keep blasting 'til we make one."

Jack fired his hands up, "I like that idea."

Dick, "easy. Last thing I smashed tried to smash me back. I'm sure this whole place is booby-trapped."

Beast Boy pops up nearby and wipes himself clean.

BB, "then how are we supposed to get out?"

Raven, "we're not. Don't you get it? Mad Mod's just gonna keep messing with us until-"

Dick, "-we mess with him. That cane of his controls everything in here. We take the cane-"

Vic, "-we take control-"

BB, "-and take him down! Oh, I'll find him. That demented doofus is never hypnotizing me again!"

A painting on the wall pops out and swings to face him, showing that hypnotic ring pattern. In no time flat, he is salivating, gurgling, and stumbling to the floor. Starfire catches him.

Blackfire, "kribble nibbits."

Mad Mod, "come on."

We see in a corner, he rises into view through a trick black tile in the floor.

Mad Mod, "won't you lot ever learn? You're in my world, my duckies", he presses the ruby on his cane, and the doors behind him open, "you can't win."

He is off in a heartbeat.

Dick, "Titans! Go!"

The others run off, leaving Jack and Starfire with BB.

Starfire, "but how do I-?"

Vic, "make him laugh!"

They find themselves standing alone, supporting the hypnotized Titan by his armpits. After a moment, Starfire hoists him up to look him in the eye and smiles broadly.

Starfire, "how many Okaarans does it take to hoegee a morflark? Finbarr!"

No change in his mumbling and driveling; apparently, the joke loses something if the listener is not conversant in Tamaranean.

Starfire thinks for a second.

Jack, "try saying something really stupid."

Starfire, "um…. Boo-gers?"

That does the trick.

BB, "hahahaha! Boogers! Aw, man!"

He is yanked off with a shout to join the chase.

Music starts playing as the chase goes on!

….

Reviews:

Bailey Radcliff: well, I'm glad you liked the chapter and are so excited for future chapters and for my Secret Saturday's story.

Jinero: their designs are basically a mix of their comic outofts, the show, and elements from the DCAU and JLU universe. And I'll make sure Raven gets your message.

raven 2012: Glad you liked the chapter and are excited for next week's chapters.

Visitor: oh, you'll have to wait and see what he truly thinks...

DaV1nc136: Well, I'm very glad you liked the last two chapters and my various changes and such to them.

….

I just love how zany this episode is.

Gives me a chance to be very wacky and weird.