A historical story about getting married first and falling in love later, a gentle beauty who got sold by his father to pay off the latter's debts, who got married to the gong (top), and who was prepared to be bullied for the rest of his life, but ended up being pampered from the start to the end by the gong who didn't let him suffer any grievances
.Special Fondness – Chapter 1
Fang Su forgot how he got into the house, he only remembers he calmly nodded and agreed to his father. The moment he let go of this breath, his father's newly wounded face brightens with a happy look, even if there was a touch of guilt, it was replaced with unconcealed gratitude.
The house is simple and crude, the only thing separating the outer hall and the inner room is only a dilapidated wooden door, unable to stop the cold wind from blowing in, let alone human voice.
That voice was sharp and piercing, it didn't care if he was able to hear it, that voice kept chattering in a festive tone: "In my opinion, it's better for him to get married. Although he is a man, there is no need to feel wrong, shouldn't he be grateful and thanks heaven and earth that there's someone who wants him? In the future there'll be one less mouth to feed, it is a good thing for us!"
There was no surprise on Fang Su's face, he has long been used to it, he just listened to it numbly. His father was probably trying to stop that voice, that voice gradually became more and more unscrupulous, and became even higher, deliberately yelling toward his room: "Did I say it wrong? He has eaten from our Fang family for free for so many years! What has he done for this family?"
"This time he didn't say anything and saved my life…" Father Fang's weakened voice could be heard, then only, the voice who was cursing became more tamed.
Fang Su who was packing his luggage came to a stop, his sight fell between his old clothes, and a wry smile appeared on his lips.
Thinking along the lines of the words, he was born weak, he couldn't go to the fields, but one couldn't say he did nothing for his family. Feeding the poultry, cleaning the yard, washing the dishes, and even sewing or doing embroidery, the things that only women would do, he did them all, simply because he wanted to make up for his family and let himself be less blamed.
As the elder son of the Fang family, he wasn't appreciated by outsiders, and he only come to realize today that perhaps, he should have broken off their kinship and left home long ago.
"He gave birth to him, raised him, it is only natural for him to exchange his life for yours." After a while, the woman's voice mumbled again, seeming to have found a new excuse, continued to her false reasoning, "If it's such a big deal after this matter is over we will just cut off our relationship, he won't owe you for bringing he up, and you won't have to worry about someone burning incense for you, without him, don't we still have another son?"
Fang Su didn't want to listen to it anymore.
He doesn't have many personal things, only two old outfits, one wooden hairpin, it wasn't cumbersome for him to pack, he can leave this place without any worries. He straightened him from his narrow wooden bed and walked back to the outer hall with his simple and crude luggage.
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The woman who was talking to herself finally stopped talking and rolled her eyes at him disdainfully.
Fang Su's did not give even half a glance at his father, he walked outside without any expression on his face, he stepped a foot outside of the threshold and paused for a while, he looked back and said to the woman peacefully: "Second mother is right, it is only fair that I use my life to repay the kindness for bringing me up. I hope that it will be as you said, from now on, the Fang family and I, will have no more relationship."
The woman did not expect that he who has always been weak and obedient would say such words before leaving, as if he deliberately slapped her in the face, as if he was afraid to have anything related to her, she couldn't stop her anger, she stopped and pointed at his back while cursing at him.
Fang Su did not hear anything, he thinks from the bottom of his heart that he really wants to cut things off and he wasn't trying to vent his anger by saying what he said.
Since his mother left this world, his father seemed to have changed into someone else – although his temperament is the same, he wasn't the father who would protect him anymore. Fang Su and his second mom can not be considered as a family, there isn't any feeling between them, what he said before leaving was directed at Fang father, he also wishes he could remember it himself, from now on even if the future ahead of him is unknown, he can be alone and carefree.
Outside the farmyard, a few burly men were already waiting impatiently for him, they did not wait for him to walk closer, they reached out and grabbed his arm, and forced him into the carriage. Fang Su didn't know where he would be taken to, he could only resign himself to fate, he hugged the luggage between his arms and closed his eyes wearily.
Only then, did he finally have the time to remember this whole farce.
Just a quarter of an hour ago, the person who is driving the carriage to some unknown place threw his father on the Fang family farmyard.
Father Fang yelled in pain, on his face were many new injuries. Fang Su hurriedly ran out of the house and bent over to help him, only to see Fang father grab him like a rescue board, holding his hand and begged him: "Please save your dad, save dad… Our Fang family cannot afford to pay for it, if you refuse to save me, then dad is afraid he won't be able to live through today…"
Fang Su did not understand but he was still shocked by the life and death situation his father was talking about, he was at a loss and ask nervously: "What on earth happened?"
Fang father moved his lips with pain, and wasn't in a hurry to answer, then saw one of the burly men approaching him. He shielded his head with his arm, and curled up on the ground, trying to hide beside Fang Su without success, he received a kick mercilessly. Fang Su hurriedly tried to protect him, but only heard the man sneered and say: "This old thing, with only four bare walls at home he still dared to enter our gambling house, now he owes us a handle of debts, even if he sells his doghouse, it won't be enough to pay up for it!"
Fang Su was stunned, there was a sudden cry that came from the house, the second mom who was hiding behind the door and peeping at them heard the truth, was hopeless and sat on the ground making a fuss, she keeps repeating "You darn thing", screaming that they can't live anymore.
Fang Su remained calm, his father's pleading reverberated in his mind, unexpectedly these people didn't beat him to death on the spot, instead, they took the pain to escort him back to this worthless farmyard, then they surely had a reason, so he looked up calmly and asked the brawny man: "What are your plans?"
The burly man smiled coldly after he heard him: "How? There is someone willing to pay for your father, it depends on whether you want to accept it."
Fang father immediately pinched him, his eyes filled with pleading. Fang Su looked at these cowering eyes, and understood in his heart, knowing that this matter obviously has something to do with him, and he was afraid that it wasn't far from 'selling one's body to be a slave".
He pondered for a while, not wanting to anger the man who just spoke.
The brawny man saw him lingering, and he was neither flustered nor grateful when he heard the words, the man felt that he lost face and bent down to catch his arm and pull him up from the ground to stare at him fiercely. Fang Su couldn't break away, and could only calmly meet those eyes until he heard some strange words filled with innuendo that his expression finally cracked a little.
"It's no wonder, you are a man but was born with such a face, you surely will be worth some tael. Since that man said he is willing to keep you, how about you use yourself in exchange for your dad's life, how about this deal?"
A voice came from the house: "Either you pack up your things and marry yourself, or you should prepare your father's funeral!"
"Please save dad, consider it as dad is begging you…" Fang father was trembling all over when he heard it, immediately tugged at the hem of his clothes, begging. Few steps away, the woman behind the door inserts herself into the conversation, saying that it's a good lifesaving solution, urging him to respond quickly.
Fang Su's mind was chaotic, he wasn't thinking about being willing or not, he couldn't believe it and said: "But I am a man, how…"
"Tss", the brawny man laughed, looked at his fragile figure, did not treat him as a man at all, mocked him: "Who doesn't know about the trend now, those high-ranking officials like this south trend. You must have never been to Goulan Yard, the little male prostitutes there… tsk tsk, look at your delicate skin and tender meat, it is not worst than them."
He just finished saying that the burly men behind him busted out laughing.
Fang Su's face became red, then became white then green, the palms under his sleeves were gradually squeezed into fists. He didn't know how he should think about it, he only knows that he couldn't stay in this place anymore, he shook off his father's hand on his clothes and walked back to the house.
Fang father heart was in a panic, afraid that he would refuse, hurriedly got up to chase behind him, but he was kicked severely by the person behind him. The strong man laughed and threw him a sentence: "Laozi doesn't have much patience, if that person doesn't come out before the sun goes down, I will set your house on fire!"
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What's more about asking him to marry someone as a man, isn't his biological father not worried about what kind of situation he will go through?
"Dad is begging you… Dad doesn't want this but if you don't agree, dad's life will be gone, Fang family will also be gone…" Fang father saw him distracted for a long time and thought that he still did not agree to it, started to reason him, "Besides, our family is poor, if you go to a big family, even if you will be considered as a woman, at least you won't have to worry about food and clothing, don't you agree?"
Fang Su laughed at himself when he heard this, nodded, and said "right". After that, he paused for a while, and under Fang father surprise gaze, he said: "Don't worry dad, I agree to it." Fang Su turned around and went back to his room without hesitation.
Fang father's words woke him up, because he always missed the affection in his childhood, he deceived himself for so many years. This place isn't his home anymore, instead of staying here for a long time, he should live somewhere else. Even if the person he will be facing is violent and cruel, the worst result will be nothing more than death.
Fang Gu completely gave up this place where he lived for more than a dozen years and left resolutely.
The horse carriage drove on the winding roads of the village towards Linzhou city located a few miles away.
The distance between the two places isn't far, it didn't take long for the carriage to enter the city, but the short amount of time still made Fang Su feel a bit drowsy in the bumpy car.
He should have been so nervous that it would have been difficult for him to sleep but Fang Su was hugging his baggage, the wooden hairpin inside seemed to be rubbing against the skin of his elbow, it seemed like the gentle and soft comfort that his birth mother would give him when she was still alive ten or so years ago, helping him slowly overcome the grief and indignation he felt.
After some time has passed, when he was about to fall asleep, the horse carriage came to a stop.
A slight neighing awakened him, he had not yet come back to his senses that someone already lifted the carriage curtain and roughly pulled him out of the horse carriage. Fang Su temporarily had difficulty standing up, when he touched the ground, he took a wrong step and a heart-wrenching pain came from his left ankle, making him frown in pain.
It wasn't a light sprain, the man who pulled him knew that he hurt him, yet the man didn't feel any remorse, sneered at him mockingly: "Looks like a lady indeed, can't even cope with a little rough treatment."
Fang Su didn't answer, he pressed his lips in silence and endured the pain as much as possible. He raised his head and looked around him, it was already dusk, it wasn't as bright as in the daytime. In the hazy sunset, he was standing in a wide courtyard, he could see from the roof tiles and corridors that it was a wealthy household, but the horse carriage dared to drive into the courtyard grandiosely, presumably this is where he ought to be sent to.
Fang Su could guess it clearly, he didn't ask any questions and waited in place without saying a word, for the time being, he just wait for these people to make arrangements.
The strong men beside him were still mocking his frailty one by one, but they didn't dare to stay in the courtyard, they seemed to be waiting for someone else.
While he was still thinking about this, someone indeed appeared in the courtyard, Fang Su looked up at the sound and he saw a girl dressed in refined clothes. At the same time, the several strong men instantly restraint their bantering, they seemed to be a bit afraid of this girl and didn't dare to misbehave.
"Miss Bai Ping" the few people greeted in unison, the leader took two steps forward and smiled flatteringly at her: "Miss, we've brought the person." He did not say any more, a smile that was asking for credits and reward hung on his face as he was waiting calmly for her reply.
Bai Ping let out a "hm" and turned her head to look at Fang Su who stood on one side.
Her gaze swept at him like a breeze, Fang Su was nervous and kneaded at his baggage, he was now in a desolate situation and cannot help himself, he even had to be on guard faced by a girl. As he was thinking like that, Bai Ping held her hands together and gave him a small salute, not only this gesture surprised Fang Su, it also surprised the few burly men.
"Young Master must be tired; this maid will guide you so you can go back to the room and rest first."
Fang Su moved his lips, suppressed the doubts in his heart, and did not express his surprise, following her to the room in the courtyard.
Bai Ping pushed open the door and stepped into the room first, only when she turned around that she noticed his slightly strange walking posture, she couldn't help but frown: "Young Master hurt his foot?"
Every of her word was unexpected, Fang Su paused at her words, he shook his head and replied: "It is not a big issue, I was not careful and sprained it when stepping out of the carriage."
Bai Ping said nothing, she guessed it in her heart, she then glanced at the few people in the courtyard, then stepped forward to help him walk and sit down on the couch.
"Young Master, the kitchen has already prepared the food, you should take a rest first, this maidservant will find someone to deliver it."
Fang Su had never been treated so politely before, Bai Ping's words were polite and respectful, hearing it was making him embarrassed, he couldn't help but persuade her: "Miss doesn't need to be this polite, I was born crude environment and now I am in a situation despite myself, I don't deserve you to call yourself "servant" …"
Bai Ping did not expect him to say this, she raised her eyebrows; she smiled and waited for him to finish his words, then responded: "Young Master will be the be this maidservant's master in the future, how is it inappropriate?" She finished her words and looked at Fang Su's puzzled look, smiled slightly, she then bowed and retreat from the room.
Fang Su sat on the couch alone, he couldn't think through her words for a while, but he inexplicably had a subtle guess in his heart: In the future, maybe his situation will not be as bleak and dreary as he thought…
On Bai Ping's side, she didn't go to the courtyard after leaving the room but walk through the small corridor and went to the kitchen, she asked someone to heat the meal, then ask a maid to prepare hot water for the bath and clean new clothes, she settled everything then returned to where the carriage was stationed, she then led the few people outside.
The few burly men were waiting impatiently, but they didn't dare to urge her, they carried a smile on their face and followed her steps, tried to flatter her: "Miss Bai Ping, look, our brothers brought the person as you had ordered, shouldn't you say few good praises in front of Master1Tang?"
1Zhuāng zhǔ, which means palace/villa master
Bai Ping squinted at the speaker, her footstep not stopping: "If you did a good job, of course, there will be a reward, but if you didn't do it well, you should be punished. The Master has always been clear about rewards and punishments, you guys should know it."
"Yes, yes, yes, of course, we know." The man agreed with a flattering smile, thinking about the reward he will receive, he was thinking that once he got the money, he will exchange it for wine and meat, he would live a happy life.
The few men secretly rejoiced, they followed Bai Ping, passing through the garden of the mansion to the outside of the main courtyard. The footsteps of the girl in front of them stopped and made them wait where they were, she entered the inner house alone. After a long while, Bai Ping finally came to lead them inside.
Under the tree in the courtyard, a person was lying on the bamboo couch comfortably, his inner clothes were embroidered with beautiful crane pattern, his light green outer robe was wrapped around him like smoke, his eyes were closed, with a glance no one was able to tell if he was awake or he was dreaming.
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"Master Tang." The few people approached; the leader greeted him with his head lowered.
Tang QiaoYuan opened his eyes, his eyes clear.
The man who just spoke saw him move, he hurriedly smiled: "Master Tang, we little ones have done the job, the person you wanted was brought here."
"Uhm." Tang QiaoYuan gave a throat-clear answer, "Twenty taels of silver for each."
"Thank Master Tang!" The few people knelt down to thanks him, they bowed their heads again and again before daring to get up. They yet have stood firm that they saw the person on the couch sitting up.
The maidservant under the tree stepped forward to assist him, Tang QiaoYuan waved his hand to make her retreat, he slightly adjusted the outer robe on his shoulders, a trace of provoking smile on his face. When he opened his mouth to speak again, his tone was icy enough to make someone shiver to its bones: "The reward that should be given was given, let's talk about the punishment."
The complexions of the several men changed, although they didn't know yet what they have done wrong, they knelt back immediately, the man who had spoken earlier hurriedly said: "Master Tang, this time we haven't been negligent!"
"Hm?" Tang QiaoYuan stretched out his hand, waiting for the maidservant to hand him the warm cup of tea, he slowly lifted the lid of the delicate cup of tea, until sweat rolled on the forehead of the few men, then asked slowly, "Who was the one who hurt Fang Su's foot?"
As soon as the person who was speaking heard this, his face turned pale in a second: isn't him the one who hurt Fang Su…
"Hm?" Tang Qiao Yuan half-voiced suspiciously.
"Master Tang, please be merciful, this small one was purely unintentional!"
The brawny man hurriedly kowtowed to him; he was so regretful in his heart. He thought that Tang QiaoYuan was just looking for a random plaything, how could he ever know that he would care so much about someone like this. If he knew it earlier, even if someone would have given him ten guts, he would have dared to be rude to Fang Su at all.
Tang QiaoYuan allowed him to beg for mercy, but he wasn't moved by it, after thinking about it for a while, he said: "You deserve the twenty taels of silver, about your wrong, you will get twenty whips."
The brawny man shut his mouth, although he was going to be punished, he was relieved, knowing Tang QiaoYuan's temperament, this punishment was already very light, so he thanked him in a hurry. The several men beside him were not implicated but cold sweat still ran down their back, they quickly followed him out of the courtyard.
The courtyard was peaceful again, Tang QiaoTuan put down his sneer, his called Bai Ping to instruct her: "Go get the medicinal liquor, go find a maid with dexterous hands to help him relieve the swelling."
"Yes, this servant understands." The girl bends in reverence and then went to do as instructed.
Tang QiaoYuan straighten his eyebrows, put the teacup back in the hand of a maid, and laid back on the couch, before closing his eyes he looked afar as if he could see through the wall of the courtyard, straight toward where that person was, the look in his eyes turned warm.
And in the bedroom of that courtyard, the kitchen has already quickly prepared the supper, a rich variety of dishes, something that Fang Su – who was accustomed to living in poverty – has never seen before. Fang Su was still sitting on one side of the bed, not knowing how to react for a while until a maid called him softly, he then raised his head nervously.
"Young Master, please come have your dinner."
Fang Su was not much on guard, he has not suffered any malice since he has arrived in the courtyard, one could say that his heart was at ease at this moment. But precisely because it was like this that it was making him confused, he couldn't figure out why the people in this mansion would treat him with such courtesy.
His identity was obviously someone who got sold off to repay a debt, yet he was provided with a good room and good food, on what basis could he get so many benefits?
Fang Su felt like he was falling into a dream, so many surprises were making him hesitated, he did not know how to answer that maid, he then hesitantly shook his head negatively. The maid looked worried and was about to persuade him again when she heard the footsteps outside the door were approaching; everyone turned around to greet "Miss Bai Ping."
Bai Ping nodded, her sight falling on the untouched dishes on the table, then saw Fang Su's uneasy expression, she then understood and said to everyone: "All of you can retreat first."
"Yes."
The maids filed out, Fang gu was finally able to let out a breath, he wasn't as embarrassed as he was earlier, looking at Bai Ping inquiringly.
Bai Ping took a few steps forward to meet his look, bending over to help. Fang Su didn't make any refusal, it was probably because the first impression is the strongest, the one he saw the first was this girl, so he felt more at ease with her, he went along her to sit down to the table.
"Young Master, please enjoy your dinner."
"Miss…" Fang Su called out hesitantly.
Bai Ping smiled "Young Master can call this maidservant 'Bai Ping'."
Fang Su nodded, but he didn't really call her like this, and asked again: "Miss Bai Ping, what does your Master…"
His question wasn't clear enough, Fang Su couldn't go on, at the end, it was a bit hard for him to continue talking. However, Bai Ping understood in her heart, she held the chopsticks and start arranging dishes for him, smiled, and said: "Young Master does not need to think too much, you will be able to see him tomorrow."
Fang Su was silent, he held on to the chopsticks, suppressing the suspicion in his heart, he was thinking whatever, what has been done is done, it would be better to deal with it peacefully.
Notes:
The brawny men adressTang QiaoYuanasTáng zhuāng zhǔ(唐庄主), 'zhuāng zhǔ' is literally "palace/villa owner", in ancient times it refers to someone affluent who has some decisional power. (If I have to use an English equivalent, it's quite similar to 'Lord').
I use "Master Tang" because it would be weird to call him "Tang palace master".
Special Fondness – Chapter 3
PUBLISHED ON11 October 2021
From the moment he knew he was going to marry a man; Fang Su knew that there will be a thousand hurdles and dangers in the future days. At present, he is staying in the wealthy mansion of someone he doesn't know the name of, everything is as he expected, everything indeed is bewildering and overwhelming.
The night sky was dim, the lights indoor were twinkling, Fang Su's cheeks were warm, he was currently so surprised that he was trying to fade into the background.
About a foot away from the couch, two maids were holding a medicine bottle in their hands and persuade him gently: "Young Master doesn't need to take it badly, we servants are just here to help you to rub your foot, you sprained your ankle, if you don't apply the medication on time, it might swell even more."
Fang Su was very anxious for a while, his words were unclear, he could only shake his head in refusal, for fear that these two persons would come close, it would not conform to the etiquette.
Fang Su was already taken aback when he took a bath earlier, he thought that once the servants have poured the hot water into the tub they would retreat and leave him alone, who would know that not only they did not retreat but took a step closer, behind them several maids rushed in on his hind feet, saying that they were worried that it would inconvenient for him to move with his injured ankle and they wanted to help him bathe and wipe his body.
Fang Su's belt was half untied, when he saw the situation, he adjusted his clothes again, no matter what they said, he refused to let them come even half a step closer. The girls couldn't persuade him, they were afraid that if they delayed it any longer the bathwater will turn cold, they could only compromise and retreat outside of the screen, although they did not approach, they still stayed in the room, listening to the sound of the bathwater, in case he had an accident.
Fang Su cleaned himself quickly with a red face, he didn't want to stay in the water any longer, he put on the thin robe prepared for him and returned to the bed with his sprained ankle and quickly wrapped himself in the quilt.
The voice in the room faded, Fang Sy breathed a sigh of relief, he thought that this awkward matter would end here, but soon after, two girls broke into the room again, insisting on rubbing medicine on his foot.
"You two girls can leave the medicine; I will just rub it on myself…" Fang Su showed embarrassment and kept persuade them to leave.
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However, these two were much more stubborn than the previous ones, they refused to go no matter what he said, they went back and forth trying to get closer to the bed, very naturally, they held his left foot with care, one of them rolled up his pant legs, the other one applied and rubbed on the medicine.
The gentle act made Fang Su feel like he was tortured, he was suffering through the entire time they rubbed medicine on his foot. He only regarded these two girls as bold and stubborn, what he didn't was these two got their order from Bai Ping –-Bai Ping said that it was Tang QiaoYuan's idea, how would they dare to not do it well?
About a quarter of an hour later, the two maidservants finally decided to stop, they helped Fang Su put down the pant leg, and carefully pulled the brocade to cover his feet, only then, they blew out the lanterns in the room and left.
Amid the darkness, Fang Su's face was so red it was almost dripping blood, his inner emotions went progressively from the initial shock to dazed at loss, he felt like his brain was filled with what seems to be a paste, in the end, he was so exhausted that he closed his eyes drowsily and sank into a dream.
The next morning, a gentle voice by the bed woke him up.
Fang Su gradually woke up from his dreamland, his eyes half-opened and half-closed, the silhouette in front of him swayed for a while, then his vision cleared, but he was stunned for a moment, then he recalled yesterday's absurdity.
Fang Su, who sobered up, was a little helpless, compared to last night, Fang Su showed a look of inability to struggle, he was thinking a bit stupidly, why the girls here are so open-minded.
"Young Master, it's almost time, you have to get up."
Fang Su nodded when he heard this, he thought carefully what she meant by "almost time". Forget it, he felt that there was something wrong with the scenery in front of him, he turned his head and look around the room, he was suddenly frozen, he saw that things in the room had increased, all of them were things for celebration, all he saw was a happy red1.
Fang Su was puzzled at first, then he felt cold, thinking that what must happen still will happen.
He was taken good cared of yesterday, he was well-fed and nicely clothed and had a good night of sleep, he shouldn't forget the reason he came here. Now thinking about it, he seems to have understood why he received a preferential treatment. He ought to be taken good care of, otherwise if he gets married in such a sorry figure, wouldn't he make that person lose face?
Indeed, no good thing comes for free in this world.
After Fang Su figured it out, his heart felt more at ease, the look of embarrassment he had displayed since last night returned to calm at this moment. He got out of bed, his obedient appearance caused all the maidservants to be puzzled, it is hard to imagine that Fang Su, who was this calm this morning, was the same person who was so embarrassed last night.
However, the time is not waiting, everybody in the whole mansion were in preparation, everyone was afraid to anger Tang QiaoYuan for such an auspicious event, they quickly and neatly took care of Fang Su. The room was silent, and no one spoke, however the maids moved between them, which made it seems very lively.
It took an hour before Fang Su was ready.
He isn't a woman and doesn't need to apply blush or powder, his waterfall hair only needs a simple brush and tied up, and his whole outfit is a non-cumbersome groom's dress, he was really puzzled why these maidservants would waste such a long time just to prepare him.
Before he could think further, Fang Su was taken out of the room. Inside the courtyard, a luxurious sedan chair decorated with tassels2was waiting, he raised his head and glanced up, wondering for a moment if he thought wrong: if they prepared a sedan chair, could it be that he had to be carried out of the house? Or does the master of this mansion wanted to gift him to someone else?
Fang Su had many suspicious in his mind, but he didn't ask anything, he just thought that it was fine anyway, there is no differences. Now, even his life was owned by other people, how could he decide on his destiny.
He stepped closer to the sedan door, then before he got in the sedan, the maid beside him told him to wait, until someone came forward with a silver plate on which lies a neatly folded bridal veil. Fang Su understood her intentions, although he was dressed in a groom's robe, this thing was indispensable at the end, so when the maid lifted the bridal veil, he bowed his head without showing any resistance, allowed her to cover his head with it, covering up his beautiful and delicate eyes.
The sedan chair was lifted and carried out of the courtyard.
A moment later, the sedan chair suddenly stopped, and Fang Su's ears were filled with lively voices, he couldn't help but feel a little astonished, he didn't think the journey would be so short. After he thought for a while, he realized that the sedan chair he got into wasn't going to leave the mansion, nor was going to send him to another house, he was still to marry the person of this mansion.
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That person is really in a leisurely frame of mind, they were going to marry a person like him, moreover a man, yet they were so serious about it, he doesn't understand why that is for.
While he was imagining things, someone stepped forward and kicked the sedan's door.
Fang Su regained his composure and stooped out of the sedan chair. The bridal veil was blocking his vision, everything he saw was dark red, his field of vision was limited to the hem of a person dressed in red just like him, and a wild palm that stretched out low for him.
The palm of that hand looked slander and powerful, Fang Su hesitated for a moment before reaching for it, compared to that hand, his own looked extraordinarily thin and could easily be held firmly.
Fang Su's heart leaped, he could feel the warmth of that palm and it inexplicably drove away some of the chills in his heart.
Tang QiaoYuan helped him cross the railing of the sedan chair, Fang Su's sprained ankle has not yet healed, he would limp a little when walking, when he was worried about whether he would fall because he couldn't see the road, the person beside him suddenly picked him up.
All-around, the people who came to congratulate them made noises, he could also vaguely hear people who were close to Tang QiaoYuan bravely teasing: "Master Tang really cherish Madam, you haven't even done the ceremony that you can't bear him to take even half a step, you are really considerate."
People around joked and laughed, but Fang Su couldn't listen to any of it, there was a "buzz buzz" in his mind, he didn't where to place his hands, he could only nervously grasp the lapels on the man's shoulders.
The group of people who surrounded them and followed them toward the front hall and saw Tang QiaoYuan who kept carrying the person in his arms inside the hall before he was willing to put them down.
There was no high hall3in this mansion, but two memorial tablets were replacing it, Fang Su didn't know because he couldn't see it, he could only rely on Tang QiaoYuan and bowed to heaven and earth4.
Before he even returned to his senses, he was carried up again, he was gradually carried away from the noise of the crowd towards a quiet place.
Since he got into the sedan chair, he hardly had taken half a step on his own.
Occasionally these were servants along the road sincerely greeting them, saying "Congratulations to master". The person who carried him didn't respond much, barely uttered a "Uhm", a simple sound and it can be heard that they have a deep and smooth voice. Fang Su could hear that this person was still young, he also remembered the strong palm that he had been holding, he was thinking that it would not be an old man with a weird personality as he had suspected and relaxed his body a little.
Tang QiaoYuan was holding him and could feel even the slightest change, he silently curved his lips into a smile, he carried Fang Su back to the room in the main courtyard. Fang Su heard the sound of a door opening, then came the crisp collision of beads of the bead curtain, knowing that he was in a room, then he was carefully placed onto the bed.
"All of you retreat."
The brief command rang in his ears very closely, the maids in the room withdrew silently, Fang Su lowered his eyes, a pair of hands stretched under the bridal veil, slowly lifted the red brocade upwards.
The person in front of him came to his view, just as the object that obscured his view was about to be completely lifted, Fang Su closed his eyes flustered.
His vision was shrouded in darkness, he was seeking the last touch of peace of mind like self-deception.
Tang QiaoYuan chuckled and wasn't in a hurry to coax him to open his eyes, his probing hand touched Fang Su's face with the back of his hand, the slightly curved knuckle of his index slid over his eyebrows, then his thumb slowly brushed against his eyelashes, as if he couldn't bear to part with it, his hand didn't before a long while.
Fang Su endured it for a while, he really couldn't bear the itchiness, he opened his eyes with trembling eyelashes and withdrew his head a few inches away.
Tang QiaoYuan let out a laugh, jokingly coaxed: "You are finally willing to open your eyes to look at me?"
Fang Su was panicked for a moment, he then looked at the person's face seriously, he couldn't help but be slightly distracted after a glance.
He was not surprised by Tang QiaoYuan's handsome appearance but by the tenderness and compassion that was in this person's eyes. Fang Su understands, he is eighteen this year, he is not so ignorant that he doesn't anything about the word "affection", but because he understands it, he was even more puzzled: why a person who has nothing to do with him, who is meeting him for the first time would show an expression with such deep affection for him?
Tang QiaoYuan saw Fang Su's subtle expression, he bowed his head with a smile and dropped a light kiss between his eyebrows.
Fang Su trembled lightly, his heart was originally tense, and he couldn't help but pray in his heart, but at a loss, he stretched out his hand and grabbed the sleeve of that person in front of him. Tang QiaoYuan couldn't help but laugh and hold his hand with a smile, he stifled a laugh for a long while and reassured him: "Don't be afraid." After saying this, he took out a hand and help Fang Su to loosen his hair and said again, "I sent someone to come deliver some porridge later, you got up early this morning, after eating, you can rest for a while. Lunch and dinner will be delivered by someone, if there is anything you need for today, you can ask someone to fetch it for you. The are many visitors who came for today's wedding, I am afraid I can only come back to accompany you in the evening."
Fang Su understood every word, but his train of thought was still lost in astonishment, he couldn't fully understand what he was saying and could only nod stupidly.
Tang QiaoYuan's smiled even deeper, then tilted his head to kiss the corner of Fang Su's lips, stood up, and turned to leave.
The room was quiet, Fang Su was dazed, and he raised his hand to touch the corner of his lips.
Notes:
The term used here is '喜红' (xi hong), 喜 means joyous/happy, happy red allude to weddings because traditional Chinese weddings are conduct in red (decorations, clothes, etc.).
Sedan chair likethis one
'高堂' (gao tang) so called "high hall" is actually where parents usually sits and kind of monitor the ceremony
Special Fondness – Chapter 4
PUBLISHED ON17 October 2021
Soon after Tang QiaoYuan left, a maidservant came to deliver breakfast to the room. There were three different kinds of porridge: sweet porridge, lean meat porridge, and fish porridge, different flavors were prepared, but the maidservant was afraid that he wasn't used to it and said: "The master said, if Madam1doesn't like it and if there is something else you would like to eat, you can tell the kitchen."
After Fang Su heard this, he didn't know how to answer.
He usually can't be this picky about what he eats as his family is poor, if there is more rice grain in the porridge, it would already be considered extravagant, if there were any meat dishes on the table, it would of course be given to his half-brother. Now that Fang father sold him to someone else to save his own life, he was initially prepared to face the worst scenario. If he can eat to his fill and wear warm clothes, it would already be considered as a vain hope. Therefore, he was afraid to face this situation, afraid that everything is just a beautiful trap, and sooner or later he would suffer more misery.
Especially the person who appeared before him and married him, he was the complete opposite of what he had expected, he was soft-spoken and full of affection, he didn't dare to think about it anymore… it was contrary to his expectation, yet everything was real.
Fang Su raised his eyes, the maidservant was still waiting beside the table waiting for his reply, he stood up and wanted to get closer, someone came forward to help him. Fang Su sat at the table, everyone in the room was quite relieved and revealed a look of rejoicing, they were afraid that this new master was hard to serve.
"Then…I'll have the sweet porridge." Fang Su replied.
The maidservant answered "yes", and carefully scooped a bowl of sweet porridge for him. Fang Su thanked her and took the bowl, the taste of the porridge was slightly sweet, he felt that it was smooth, but he could not tell what else it contained. In fact, it was not just a pumpkin and sweet potatoes porridge, there was also quite a lot of bird nest.2
He was even more nervous than he first arrived yesterday; although the dinner was quite rich, Fang Su just filled his stomach hastily. After tossing till now, Fang Su was very hungry, the small porridge was also particularly pleasant to the palate, before he knew it he could no longer hold back and ate three small bowls of it.
The maidservant had a relieved smile and looked after him thoughtfully, she waited for him to finish his breakfast and help him to return to bed, only after did she retreat from the chamber with the other servants.
The maidservant went to the front courtyard, the spacious courtyard was full of dining tables, and there was an early banquet. Today, Tang QiaoYuan was less hostile than usual and looked more approachable. The maidservant jogged to him, smiled, and greeted him, and said: "Master, Madam is resting, he had three small bowls of porridge, he will surely not be hungry."
After hearing this, Tang QiaoYuan's mood turned very good, he grabbed some silver taels to reward her. The maidservant happily received it, replied a "thank you master", then returned to the main courtyard.
The faction of the mansion was very lively, there was no disturbance all day long, everything went smoothly.
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Everybody was very happy, only Fang Su was a little absent-minded, he seldom stepped out of the room during the whole day, and was mostly lying on the couch, sometimes asleep, sometimes awake, he was tossing over the future of his fate and came up with countless possibilities. He was thinking that maybe this kind of treatment was only temporary, and very quickly he might be criticized; then he also thought about the so-called "master" the maidservants talked about, maybe the man who he married will be tired of this new situation tomorrow, maybe he would sell him off to somewhere else…
But even if that was the case, then where does the affection in those eyes come from?
The more Fang Su thought about it, the more perplexed he was, but never had he thought that maybe he could be spending the rest of his life with Tang QiaoYuan.
The daytime wasn't hard to bear, but when nighttime came, Fang Su could not lie down anymore. After dinner, he refused to return to rest on the bed, he finally got a little bolder. After the maids left, he walked around the room alone and looked at the delicate objects shelved around with novelty.
There was a desk made of golden phoebe wood in the room, the four treasures3could be found on the desk, there were also some scrolls and books placed on one side of the desk. Fang Su approached hesitantly, he reached out his hand and touched the row of hanging brushes, he became inexplicably happy, and couldn't help but take one-off, holding the pen as the schoolteacher did in his memory, he wrote and painted in the air.
His eyebrows slowly relaxed, he was too fascinated and didn't notice that someone had entered the room, he moved the pen brush happily as if he had really written two Chinese characters, he read in a low voice: "Fang, Su.4"
That person approached and took him in his arms.
Fang Su's fingers shook, the brush fell on the table, the smile that had originally floated on his lips disappeared instantly, and his heartbeat stopped for an instant.
Tang QiaoYuan looked at his frightened expression, smiled, and kissed the top of his head, his arm went around him, picked up the pen again, and asked: "There are papers on the table, why didn't you write on the paper, uhm?"
Fang Su did not reply, he looked down at the hand, which was holding the pen, and did not dare to take it. Tang QiaoYuan waited for a long time and didn't get a response, he pulled Fang Su's waist and turned him slightly to his sideways, glanced at him, and saw that the corners of his eyes were slightly red, he had actually been scared by him.
"Did I scare you?" Tang QiaoYuan frowned, his voice became softer.
Fang Su unconsciously nodded, then immediately shook his head, then looked up at him, particularly at a loss.
As if his heart was scratched by something very soft, Tang QiaoYuan sighed, and loosen his hold on Fang Su, he then took him to stand behind the desk, coaxing him: "Come on, write whatever you want on the paper."
Fang Su looked at the pure white rice paper, his beating heart gradually calmed down, he lingered for a while and replied: "I don't know how to."
"Hm?" Tang QiaoYuan stretched out one hand to grind the ink and asked with a smile: "Weren't you writing your name?"
"I have never written it on paper", Fang Su replied, after speaking up, he dared to talk more and explained, "I never went to a school when I was a child, I always had to walk a long way to come to Lin City and eavesdropped outside the window of the school. The schoolteacher was very nice, he discovered me very early on, later when I went there, there would always be a small chair outside the window…"
Tang QiaoYuan waited for a long time for him to be willing to speak, now that he could hear him speak so many words at once, he was so happy in his heart but did not dare to show it, for fear that it would scare Fang Su again, he only followed up with a simple question: "Which school?"
"The one in the east of the city, the teacher's surname is Wāng, he is a very good person."
Tang QiaoYuan nodded and noted that in his heart, the arm he had around Fang Su's waist tightens a little: "Then what about afterward?"
When he heard that question, Fang Su was silent for a moment, his following words lost the faint happiness he felt earlier, and said in a disappointed voice: "Later, my mother was gone, my father had a second wife, second mother didn't allow me to go the city all day, so I haven't gone there for many years."
Tang QiaoYuan did not continue to ask, the words stopped here, he tilted his head and dropped a kiss on the side of Fang Su's neck.
Fang Su's long hair wasn't combed together, the silky black hair was scattered on his shoulders, covering a large area of his skin, the pair of lips merely kissed the skin through his hair so he could only feel a faint sensation. But even so, he was still stunned, his neck seemed to burn a little, and the heat from that spot spread up, and his cheeks were burning red.
Fang Su bowed his head in embarrassment, his thoughts were no longer stuck on sad things.
Tang Qiao Yuan has already finished grinding the thick ink, smiled and dipped the brush in the ink, and said: "I will write it for you."
Fang Su silently nodded.
That person's brush style was vigorous, but he concealed it with supple strokes, writing his name patiently and meticulously. Fang Su observed and thought silently, his handwriting seemed to be even more beautiful than the school teacher's.
"What do you think about it?" Tang QiaoYuan put down the brush and asked.
Fang Su nodded and replied honestly: "It looks beautiful."
His reply drew deep laughter, Tang QiaoYuan put the pen brush in Fang Su's right hand, tipped the brush into new ink, and coaxed him: "Try writing it, once you are used to writing it on paper, you will be able to do it."
A drop of ink fell, and it soon smudged the white paper.
Fang Su's heart stirred, he was looking forward to writing, just next to the two characters that Tang QiaoYuan had just written, he learned the strokes and wrote down his name.
Fang Su only tried to draw on the ground with a tree branch, he had never really held a brush before today, after all. Now that he is writing on rice paper for the first time, the character's font was inevitably immature and not nicely shaped.
But Tang QiaoYuan liked it and praised him: "Su Su wrote so well for the first time, if you practice more, I don't know how beautiful your writing can be?"
Fang Su paused, his ears were hot after hearing these two words, in his memory, he has also been called like this before, but his memory was very vague, it was a term of affection that he only heard when his birth mother was still around a dozen years ago.
Now that he suddenly hears it again, he was at loss on what to do.
There was an unknown thing that was faintly moving in his chest, Fang Su was silent for a long time, then asked in the quietest voice: "What is your name?" An embarrassed expression on his face.
Tang QiaoYuan's eyes showed joy and without taking a pen, he took Fang Su's hand which was still holding the brush and led his hand to write down three distorted characters.
"Táng qiáo yuan5", he said, "This is my name."
Fang Su looked at the few characters, his eyes were warm, after looking at them for a while, he let out a faint smile without knowing it.
Because it was the first time that he came into contact with brushes and paper, Fang Su wasn't tired and played with it for a long time with great interest. The person behind him was very patient, he taught him and coaxed him, only persuading him once it was late at night: "Let's write again tomorrow, alright?" His words were careful, he didn't want to spoil his mood.
Fang Su was satisfied, he was happy in his heart, he doesn't know when he forgot to be on guard toward Tang QiaoYuan. He nodded happily and put down the pen brush in his hand.
He didn't come back to his senses until he was suddenly picked up.
Earlier, Tang QiaoYuan was standing behind him the whole time and it was difficult to see him; now, seeing him in red clothes, Fang Su suddenly remembered that today is their wedding day.
The restlessness he felt during the daytime returned, Fang Su was sat on the side of the couch, he saw Tang QiaoYuan walking to the table and fetched two small silver cups containing wine, sat beside him, and said: "We already bowed to Heaven and Earth, now we just have to join our cups."
Fang Su took it, although he was nervous, he was still obedient, he drank the cup of wine without saying a word.
He had never drunk alcohol before and he was choked on the spicy wine, Tang QiaoYuan patted his back, smiled, and said: "Why did you not drink it slowly?". Then, after seeing that he still hasn't calmed down, and his tears were about to spill out, he suddenly bowed and kissed his lips. Fang Su was stunned, the smell of alcohol was mingling in his mouth, the tip of his tongue was sucked by that person and his thoughts were wandering.
After a long while, Tang QiaoYuan let him go, and stroked his hot cheeks deliberately, "Is it better?"
Fang Su didn't know if he should nod or shake his head, his whole body was stiff, with "wedding festivities6" in his mind, he didn't dare to think deeply.
Unexpectedly, Tang QiaoYuan did not make any more intimate gestures, he got up and put down the wine cups on the table, after turning back, he squatted down to help him take off his shoes and socks and lie down on the bed.
"Your foot injury hasn't healed, I will apply medicine for you first, for today just freshen up and go to bed early."
Fang Su nodded, very puzzled.
The red candles were slowly burning, Tang QiaoYuan who was dressed in red sat beside him and rubbed his ankle as if tending to a treasure.
The candlelight hit the side of his face, Fang Su looked at him with his lips pursed, all of a sudden, an uncleared expectation bloomed at the bottom of his heart.
Breaking through the rocks, just like bamboo shoots that would spring up after the rain.
Notes:
The maidservant is really using "Madam" despite Fang Su being a man, lol
Bird nestisn't actual bird nest but an edible swallow nest, click on the link for more info. Chinese believe that it has high nutritional value and is good for the body, it is extremely expensive.
The Four treasures of the study: The brush, the ink stone, the ink stick and paper.
Fāng sù (方素), his surname is 方 which is same as is 'square', his name 素 means 'simple/plain'
Táng qiáo yuān (唐桥渊), 唐 as in Tang Dynasty, 桥 means 'bridge' and 渊 'deep'.
Their names are quite the opposite and quite fitting to their characters.
Wedding festivites or 洞房花烛 (Dòngfáng huāzhú), which is just a nice way to say couple going through the wedding night/sleeping together
Special Fondness – Chapter 5
PUBLISHED ON19 October 2021
This has been the most peaceful night Fang Su has ever slept in recent years.
It was clear that there was a time when his life experience was drifting and became confusing, but for some reason, he now felt a strong sense of belonging, as if for the last ten years he had been living like an outsider in his own family. Now that he has inexplicablycome to an unfamiliar place,his heart instead feels at ease,andthere is no need for him to worry about others anymore.
Before going to bed, Tang Qiaoyuan didn't do anything to make a move, after he only rubbed his ankle, he went to wash away the residual medicinal liquor on his hands, and went to hug him in his arms and kiss his brows, eyes, nose and lips with gentle movements without any lust.
Fang Su did not resist, he felt that these warm lips were giving him just enough comfort, he closed his eyes and relaxed as his thoughts gradually drifted away
When he woke up again, he had taken the initiative to cuddle up in Tang QiaoYuan's arms, with his cheeks against his neck. He slept so much that his whole body was feeling nice and warm.
Tang QiaoYuan woke up long ago, but didn't dare to disturb him, he embraced him motionlessly,hence when Fang Su's movements couldn't be concealed,he felt too ashamed at the time, but it was too late for him to hide it.
"Did you sleep well?" Tang QiaoYuan loosened his arms and lowered his head to kiss his hot cheeks.
"En." Fang Su nodded.
Tang QiaoYuan sat up, slightly moved his numb arm and leaned over to support Fang Su while saying: "I originally thought of taking you outside for a stroll, but your leg has not healed yet and it is inconvenient to walk."
Fang Su raised his eyes, he wanted to say that it was only a minor sprain and there was no need to exaggerate, so why treat it with so much care. But after giving it some thought, he felt that whether he said it or not would make no difference, after all, he has to depend on one, he just has to listen to this person's arrangements.
Tang QiaoYuan didn't notice what he was thinking, so he casually added: "We can go later, for now let's remain at the estate to recuperate. I will teach you how to write, andif you are tired of it, I can also read books to you."
Fang Su's eyes were bright, repeating what he just said brainlessly: "Read to me?"
"You don't like it?" Tang QiaoYuan asked with a smile.
Fang Su promptly nodded his head: "Like it." His eagerness caused Tang Qiao Yuan to look down and grin.
So after breakfast, Tang QiaoYuan carried him to the courtyard, sat him at the stone table, and after a short while, people brought high stacks of books from the library, arranged them into categories and genres, making it easier to choose.
Fang Su sat at the table, he didn't know many words, so he couldn't understand what these books were about, he could just wait for Tang QiaoYuan to finish picking one. Tang QiaoYuan picked a book, he suddenly saw a picture book mixed among them, there was little text, but the pictures were vivid, he smiled and asked: "Is Su Su afraid of spirits?"
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Fang Su did not understand, only when Tang QiaoYuan brought the book to his eyes that he understood that it was about the folk legends. The picture showed a monster with a splitting grin, with eight limbs, three heads, but it wasn't scary. In broad daylight, looking at a picture like this wasn't scary, Fang Su slightly smiled and shook his head, looking up at Tang QiaoYuan with some expectation on his face.
Tang QiaoYuan felt that he chose the right one. He brought the book beside him, flipped it to the first page, and started to tell him the story from the beginning.
This book is actually composed of short stories, a ghost was drawn on every page, with a caption describing its appearances and its power, letting people imagine the rest of it. Tang QiaoYuan simply made things up, only wanting to make him happy. When Fang Su was fascinated by it, he would ask a few simple questions, Tang QiaoYuan carefully answered them, speaking very well, as if he had seen them himself.
After narrating, again and again, the thin book reached its end.
Fang Su was still immersed when finished, eventually, he asked: "En… Do you know what the big-headed ghost looks like?"
"Big-headed ghost?" Tang QiaoYuan had never heard of it, he roughly had an idea, but he still asked, "Where did Su Su hear of it?"
Fang Su recalled: "I heard it from my mother when I was young, every day, once the darkness comes, my mother forbade me to go out, saying that there would be a big-headed ghost that only fed on children."
Tang QiaoYuan understood, no wonder he had never heard of it, it was actually something made up by the mother-in-law that he had never seen, to frighten Fang Su, he chuckled and said: "En, then I have heard of it. This ghost looks like a Tanghulu, there is only one hawthorn fruit on its stick, it would move around the top of it."
Fang Su let his imagination run from those words and curved the corner of his eyes.
Tang QiaoYuan saw that he liked it, and started to make it up.
"That head was too heavy, it was easy to slosh around while it was walking, it would spin around like this." Tang QiaoYuan moved his head to demonstrate it while speaking. Fang Su looked at him seriously with a pair of bright eyes, his gaze following his movements, and he was kissed when he wasn't aware.
Fang Su was dumbfounded, he actually thought for a while whether Tang QiaoYuan was making up a story or the big-headed ghost really does exist… while his doubts have not been thought through yet, Tang QiaoYuan wrapped the hand that was holding the book behind Fang Su's back and bowed his head, he did not have the slightest teasing expression he did a while ago, and softly caught his lips.
Fang Su closed his eyes, stopped thinking, and allowed the tongue in his mouth. After a while, he raised his hands to pinch on Tang QiaoYuan's sleeves and responded in a shallow way. Despite him being stiff and nervous, Tang QiaoYuan went wild in excitement, his original intention weakened and gradually showed his aggressiveness. Fang Su's tightly closed eyelashes trembled and was gradually pressed against the pavilion's pillar. After a long time, he let out a suffocating and unbearable groan.
Tang QiaoYuan recovered his calmness, he finally ended the long kiss, while the book in his hand has long been wrinkled and deformed.
Fang Su's chest was fluctuating, lowered his eyes to avoid his gaze, in an instant his chin was lifted and he had to raise his head, seeing that a pair of eyes as fierce as fire were staring at him, his voice was low and could not be refuted: "You already married me, bowed to Heaven and Earth, exchanged wine cups with me, you are someone who is officially married to me."
Fang Su did not know what he meant and waited calmly for him to finish his sentence.
Tang QiaoYuan still asked: "How shall you call me?"
Fang Su was taken aback. Too shy to speak out, he tightened his lips.
Tang QiaoYuan had actually noticed it.
When he was about to ask, he hesitated for a moment.
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Fang Su hesitated, not knowing how he should refer to this person before him, even though he already knows his name, he couldn't say it openly, he knew deep in his heart that he was different from Tang QiaoYuan, he cannot call him in such an intimate fashion, so he could only avoid it.
Tang QiaoYuan paid attention to it, his heart ached, and did not want to let this matter go.
"You shall call me 'QiaoYuan', if you don't call me so, then I will pretend not to hear you" Tang QiaoYuan knew that he couldn't bear to lie to him, yet still wanted to pretend, but quickly he followed with a soft and warm voice while smiling "If you call me 'Husband', then I would gladly go along with it"
Fang Su's complexion turned red, he couldn't help himself while listening, but the man who was waiting for an answer refused to let go of his hand, so with a soft and brief voice he called "QiaoYuan…"
Tang QiaoYuan curved his lips with satisfaction, before retracting his hand, he lightly kissed him on the cheek.
Fang Su's eyes started to mist, he didn't know whether he was shocked or anxious. Tang QiaoYuan looked at him softly, no longer forcing him, and said while holding him in his arms: "You're still not used to it yet, one day you will understand our relationship, then you will rely on me without question."
Fang Su did not comment, it is difficult to imagine the situation from his words but faintly thought that he was not unwilling to rely on him. The reason for hesitating was the fear that remained and the lack of clarity on the road ahead.
If there really are divinities in this world that could tell him that this person will love him for the rest of his life, then surely, he will no longer have any doubts, and is willing to repay him with his life.
Fang Su tentatively raised his hand, and slowly returned Tang QiaoYuan's hug.