MC stare at herself in the mirror, as she often did in the mornings before she left her admittedly dingy basement apartment.
She is dressed in her uniform, as she is almost every day. She works as a waitress on Jaehee's coffee shop from Monday through Saturday, and she always leave home fully dressed, as their staff room is a little cramped and wonky to change at. She lifts her long skirt and examines her thighs and how they seem too close together.
She put it back down with a grimace, glad that the uniform was a shade of brown, a maid-style skirt that went down to her ankles, and also grateful that she can wear black stockings under it. On top, the frills of the shirt and the apron made good work out of stuffing her figure, all of which hides her arms and stomach.
None of it, however, can hide her face. Her eyes looked dim, her lips are pale, as was her skin. Her hair was messy, but she knew it was as good as she is going to get with it down. So, she plaid it, one on each side in French braids. Then, she applies some makeup to make it look like she is not coming down with the flu or coming back from the zombie apocalypse and spreads some lipstick, which gives her face a little colour.
MC looks at herself once more, unsatisfied.
When she is done scrutinising herself, making the best job out of herself that she could, she heads out the door and into their tiny living room, where she meets her boyfriend and roommate, who was waiting patiently for her to get out.
She does not know what Hyun ever saw in her. She is not anything special, looks and personality alike. She had heard time and time again people say that love is blind, and that should serve as motivation to someone as homely as her. After all, there could be someone out there that would overlook this sort of thing, if she excels in every other aspect.
In a way, they were right. A man that resembled a fairy-tale prince so much that he often plays one in theatre fell in love with she despite her underwhelming performance in the looks department.
It feels like a bittersweet victory.
MC knows she is supposed to be happy about that, but she cannot help but to wonder how long is she going to retain his attention while there are better alternatives hanging around by the barrel, just waiting for the slightest display of interest.
She just wants to be pretty. Not beautiful, she would settle for just pretty.
Hyun smiles at the woman as she emerges out the door, jolly for yet another morning upon them.
"Are you ready yet?" He asks.
Things are looking well for him. He buried the hatchet with… Well, he supposes he should address the man as Jumin, even in the privacy of his mind. This was the end of his main source of irritation. Besides, he had to admit that the connections provided by C&R are doing wonders for his career.
Most importantly, he was on a relationship with the love of his life.
He does not know how he got so lucky as to have MC. Like every morning, she looked absolutely stunning. Her beautiful hair was in French braids, resting on her shoulders. Her eyes were as bright as ever, like they always were, as it was originally her eyes that drew him to her, mesmerising as they are. Her lips looked irresistible, it was hard for him not to bring her in his arms and kiss her right there and then. They always tasted of the strawberry gloss she used so frequently. He loved the way she tasted. He craved it.
He could tell she is wearing makeup. He does not understand why, she never needs it. He usually chalks it up to Jaehee wanting to keep a standard in her employees, and he can appreciate the fact that he is the only one that can see her au natural. His favourite days were Sunday mornings, when they would wake up together, much too late, and enjoy each other's company for a moment. Her hair would be messy and tied in a messy bun and she would have no makeup on at all.
Yes, they were his favourite days.
"Yes!" MC smiles back at him, reaching for her purse. "Just let me pick up the helmet and we're good to go."
Hyun hugs her into his side, kissing the top of her head gently. He insists in driving her to and from work every day, as it is time that they can spend together. Besides, for an ex-overworked office employee, her boss is a bit of a slavedriver, having her on the floor for almost as much as he rehearses, and so their schedules tend to line up pretty well.
They leave their apartment complex through the busy streets, twisting around the heavy traffic on the high-capacity motorcycle. She tucks her skirt in between her legs to avoid having them blow in the wind and the helmet does little to disturb her tight braids.
In the blink of an eye, she is taking orders at the counter. The morning rush came and went, and MC and Jaehee had some breathing space between stragglers that stumbled into the store ever so often.
"Are you alright?" The business owner says, a little concerned. "I know mornings are rough, but you seem a little off today."
"It's nothing. I haven't slept too well tonight." MC smiles.
The other woman does not seem to believe her, but she drops the subject.
MC really wanted it to be nothing. She does not know what had brought it up so fiercely today. It was a daily thing, as her appearance never changed for the better, but today felt worse.
Maybe it was because summer was approaching and she would have to show more skin, otherwise she might actually die of heat exhaustion. Maybe it was because she cannot handle seeing another gossip-peddling publication suggest that Hyun has an affair with some show-business type or another. Or maybe it was because, only two days prior, the RFA had a progress meeting. It was shocking to see so many conventionally beautiful people sitting together in such close proximity. It was torturous to be forced to look at them every day and know that she would never be like them.
She works her shift visibly absent-minded. While she has not made any terrible mistakes, it is clear that she was too preoccupied with other things, staring at every girl in the room and comparing them to herself. The results were that she had decided all of them were prettier than her.
When time finally came and he went to the café to pick her up, Hyun noticed there was something off with his girlfriend that day. Usually, she would all smiles and laughs, animatedly telling him what had passed during work that day.
It is nothing new with MC, but he could not get used to it. He hated when she had these days because it meant she is hurting. He hated to see her in pain.
He was sitting in the living room with her, the TV was turned off and the lights were not too bright. They were both reading, him a script, her a book, though it does not seem as if she is focussing very hard on it. She is constantly shifting and fidgeting. He takes her hand and she looks up from her book finding his eyes.
"Wouldn't you sit down with me a minute?" He asks gently.
"Is everything alright?" She asks worriedly.
Had she upset him? She had not meant to.
"I'm not sure. Come sit down with me on the couch, darling." The man responds, firm.
MC nods, closing her book and placing it on the dining table in front of her, following him by the hand across the short distance between where she was sitting and where he was lounging. Instead of making herself comfortable on the couch, she elects to stand in front of him, who looks up and sighs.
"What's wrong?" He asks, scrutinizing her posture.
"Nothing." She lies with ease.
"I know there's something wrong here, MC." He counters with conviction, giving her hands a squeeze of encouragement.
Hyun knew her much too well at this point, all but one little detail that she hides with much care. He is an actor, a celebrity, and she knows that he would not like her as much if he knew how insecure she is. So, she remains silent in front of him, refusing to give into him.
He does not make it easy, though. His face looks so gentle and understanding, with just a twinge of hurt, as if keeping this from him was like kicking a puppy. He makes it seem as if she could tell him anything.
"Love, come on. Please?" He insists, unwaveringly.
The sheer delicacy of his words and his tone cause MC to crumble. She does not turn around to hide her face, it is not as if he has never seen her cry before.
While her voice keeps silent, her eyes say all he needs to know. He stands up and embraces her immediately. Her arms are glued to her sides. She is completely still, with the exception of the small trembles that come with her crying.
"What is it?" He asks, pulling away while keeping a hold of her shoulders. "Please tell me what it is, I want to make it better."
"You can't…" The woman says quietly, hearing her own pain in her voice.
Hyun brushes away a tear that falls onto her cheek. "Why?"
"Because you can't change me." She whispers, closing her eyes.
"Change you?" The man almost scoffs at the notion. "Why would I ever want to change you? Why would you?"
He is genuinely concerned now. Not that he was not before, but it had been amplified with the words that left her lips moments ago.
"Because, I'm not pretty enough. I'm not even pretty, I'm… Ugly." She chokes out in between sobs, truly believing every word she is saying. "I'm homely, I'm fugly, I'm unattractive. I'm Goddamn ugly. And I hate saying it out loud because it makes me seem shallow a-and stupid. And I know you're going to tell me the opposite. But it doesn't mean it's true. You just say it because you have to, because you want to make me feel better."
Hyun cannot believe the words that are coming out of her mouth. How long had his girlfriend felt like this? She is the most beautiful creature on earth. He had always thought so, from the moment he saw her.
"You don't sound stupid, much less shallow. We all have our insecurities, it's alright, but this shouldn't be one of yours. Your beauty is so great and so overwhelming I cannot help but feel jealous, of you and from you. I look at you every day, I look at your body every day and I think it's stunning. I think you're stunning because you actually are. I wouldn't change a damn thing about you, MC. Not your eyes, not your hair, not your lips, not your body, not your cute little nose, not anything. The dimples at the bottom of your back, I'll keep those, too. Those little freckles that appear in the summertime, yes, those will have to stay." He smiles, tapping her nose gently. "MC, my love, I don't ever want you to feel like this. you are beautiful, and may God, Buddha or whatever strike me down right now if I'm lying."
His eyes and his words are so full of adoration that new tears stream down her face. These ones were not tears of pain. Beautiful?
Beautiful.
MC comes out of the bedroom and into the living room fully dressed for work, like she does every morning.
The first thing she sees when she crosses the threshold is Hyun. She sits beside him and he pulls her in, kissing the top of her head. Her hair was in French braids, she had little makeup on and her strawberry lip balm, as usual.
"You look different today." Hyun says, appreciatively.
"I do?" She asks innocently, smiling at her boyfriend.
She knew she looked different today. Today, she looked happy, but the difference was that she felt happy.
MC felt beautiful.
