I'm a silly person but I'm sad and I have a soft spot for this couple so here we are.
***Kate's room at the Salem Inn at some point after all the bad things came out and Roman kicked her out of the pub. July 2022. ***
It's late. Kate is sitting on her bed at the Salem Inn in her robe. She's holding a book, but she hasn't turned the page in a while. Her mind keeps wandering to the events of the past few weeks. The words on the page in front of her might as well be in another language. She wearily places the book on the nightstand and rubs her eyes. She's just so tired. Her mind is preoccupied with what is going on with Lucas and Chad; there's little she can do to help either of them right now, she's doing what she can, but she feels so useless. Her mind flashes to Roman's face when he told her to leave the pub and not come back; the image is burned into her brain, every detail. He looked so cold. Her vision starts to blur as a few tears start to trickle down her cheeks. She wipes them away and takes a deep breath. She looks around the hotel room, taking in its familiar décor. The gentle hum of the air conditioner is the only sound; the drawn curtains moving slightly with the air flow.
"You always somehow end up back here, don't you, Katie girl?" she says out loud to no one. She feels a tightening in her chest causing her breath to catch in her throat at the sound of his nickname for her on her lips. She leans back against the headboard, closes her eyes, and lets out a weary sigh.
She hears a knock at the door. She ignores it. She doesn't want to see anyone right now and who would want to see her anyway? Lucas is still being held at the jail, Phillip is still in the hospital, and she's managed to alienate everyone else she cares about. Her specialty. She has a fleeting vision of Allie's face when she told her the truth causing her stomach to twist into knots. The knocking persists. She rolls her eyes and slowly gets up off the bed to go to the door, stopping to look in the mirror. She uses her hands to wipe away any left-over tears and the smeared makeup under her eyes. Her eyes are a little red, but she is satisfied with her appearance, so she moves to open the door.
She swings the door open, and her breath catches in shock. It's Roman.
"Hello, Kate," he says less harshly than she was expecting, but without any of the usual warmth in his tone.
"What are you doing here, Roman? Did something happen? Is Lucas, ok? Is Chad…?" Some tiny hints of panic around the edges of her voice start.
"They're fine," he interrupts before she can finish and go into a full tailspin. He takes in her appearance. She looks tired. Has she been crying? Not that she would ever admit that to him right now, but he asks anyway, "you've been crying?"
"No." Kate says almost too quickly. "I'm just tired. I haven't been sleeping. Why are you here anyway? I thought you were done with me." She sounded more acerbic than she intended.
"I came to talk," he says, again, without the warmth she accustomed to.
She moves to the side to let him enter the room and closes the door.
"About what?" Kate says almost wearily. "If you're here to tell me that I'm a terrible person, that I ruined what we had, that I hurt your daughter, I'd rather you just leave. I know I screwed up. What I did was unforgivable, so you've said. Nothing I say will change your mind. So, what's the point, Roman?"
"I just need to understand, Kate." His voice rising slightly. "You let my daughter gallivant around the world with her kidnapper! We didn't hear from them for weeks. What if he had done something? What if he had hurt her? Even then, when we were both worried because we hadn't heard from them in so long, you said nothing, Kate. Nothing. You wanted no secrets between us and then five days later, it was like we never had that conversation."
"Look. My judgement when it comes to my children is always lousy. I know that. You know that. I shouldn't have lied. I didn't want to lie. I was so angry at Lucas for what he did, but I felt trapped, Roman. Backed into a corner. I'm not saying this is an excuse. It just is what it is. I am who I am. We talked about this before we decided to go down this road together again. I said that to you. You said you know me better than I know myself, so you were ready for this, ready for us. Maybe I did believe that at first, but here we are again. I did something awful to protect my son. You're angry. You shut me out. Only this time…" she pauses. "This time I wasn't trying to hurt anyone. I didn't want anyone to get hurt. I wasn't trying to hurt Sami…"
"No, you just protected the person who hurt her because that's better," he interrupts with a tinge of bitterness.
"I begged Lucas to tell Sami the truth himself. I wanted to tell you, I just…" Kate trailed off.
"You didn't trust me," he said flatly.
"I wanted to. I was…too afraid. No one…has ever stayed. They say they will, they love you no matter what, but when it comes down to it, they always leave."
"They?"
"Men." She says with a shrug.
"So, I'm just lumped with the rest of them then."
"No." she said softy. "You never were. You were always different. We were always different. If I'm honest, I never felt worthy of your love, not then or now. And I've proven the harsh reality of that fact again."
"Katie." He says with a furrowed brow.
Her heart flutters for just a moment at the nickname on his lips. "So maybe I'm just a self-fulfilling prophecy. I don't trust because I don't want to get hurt, but I always end up hurt anyway and hurting the people I love in the process. A damaged person leaving a trail of ruin behind her every time. Keep running away from me and don't look back, Roman."
Their eyes meet. He looks a little softer than before, but she still sees a flash of anger behind his eyes. Her eyes are open and vulnerable, but sad and dull, not even a hint of her usual twinkle.
Roman turns to leave the room. Kate sinks down onto the bed with a soft sigh. Roman looks back at her as he is about to open the door. The way her shoulders are hunched over, she looks so small, almost like she's trying to disappear into the bed. It's not the strong, take no prisoners image of the Kate he knew…and loved. Loves. He feels a split-second ache in his chest and tears start to well up in his eyes making his vision blur slightly. He blinks them away and looks at Kate again, sitting on the bed, shoulders slumped over, eyes looking down at the carpet. His mind races. He's so angry at her that he can feel the heat on his face and the blood pounding in his temples, but something in him is starting to soften. There's an internal war going on inside. He wants to hold onto his anger; it's safe and familiar, but there's no denying the other feeling tugging at the back of his mind. He still loves her. After everything, he still does, the truth hits him like a truck, his heart starts to race. Fifteen years ago, she did hurt his daughter with true malice. He let her go and shut her out; he put up a wall and never looked back. He always wondered, what if? They became friends, and then finally, they did start to entertain the what if. Now, here we are again. Is he making the same mistake a second time? This train of thought is interrupted by his anger creeping back in again. He takes a deep breath and looks back at her one last time, his hand on the doorknob.
Kate hears Roman move towards the door, but there's a pause and she never hears the door open.
There's a second of hesitation when he looks back at her and then, he takes two large strides toward the bed and takes her in his arms. She starts at the sensation of his strong arms wrapping her in a tight embrace. Roman feels her body tense up with the surprise physical contact; but she almost immediately relaxes into his embrace, and then he feels her body softly shaking. She's crying. He feels tears welling up in his eyes as well.
No words. Just the two of them wrapped in each other's arms, as they fall asleep. Both able to rest without intrusive thoughts or nightmares for the first time in weeks.
***The next morning. ***
Kate opens her eyes, blinking a few times to clear the blur of sleep from her vision. It takes her a minute to get her bearings. She's in her room at the Salem Inn. As usual, the room is silent save for the gentle hum of the air conditioner and the soft rustling of the curtains. Sunlight creeps through the cracks in curtain; the lines of sunlight dancing on the wall in front of her from the slight movement of the curtain. She's still in her robe from the night before. Her mind races. Was Roman here last night? Did that happen? Was it all a dream? She sits up with a start and turns to look at the other side of the bed; it's empty, the room is quiet. She feels a tightness in her throat. She pulls her knees up to her chest and hugs them tightly to her body trying to ward off the intense loneliness and sorrow that is creeping in. She feels a few warm tears slide down her cheek. She hears a noise that startles her; it's the bathroom door opening. And then, there he is, Roman, standing there in his slacks and undershirt, wrinkled from sleep. His forehead crinkles in concern.
"I thought…I thought I dreamt that you were here or that you had left during the night when you came to your senses," she said, her words a little shaky from the tears, placing her hand over her mouth to try to stifle any further tears.
"I almost did. I was going to, but I just couldn't."
"Are you going to now?" she asks almost holding her breath.
"I don't know." He sits down next to her and gently wipes a tear away almost out of habit.
He seems less angry now, but there's still something there that she can't place. He's still holding something back.
She nods her head and takes a breath. "Ok. I can wait. Maybe I don't have a right to ask this but please, when you decide…whichever way you decide, mean it. I don't think I can take another heartbreak. I'm not strong enough."
"You're the strongest woman I've ever met, Kate."
Tears welling up in her eyes, "I love you, Roman. I love you so much. I'm sorry I hurt you."
"I love you too, Katie, but I'm not promising anything yet. You broke my heart…again. You lied…again. And I'm still so furious with you sometimes I can't see straight."
"I understand." She says, wiping a tear away. "I'm glad you came. That you…stayed, for now."
She reaches out and touches his cheek. He leans in closer to her, closing the gap between them, and she feels the warmth of his mouth on hers as he pulls her into a deep passionate kiss. They pull each other closer, holding on so tightly, almost as if each of them is desperate to not let the other slip out of the embrace. They pull away slightly after the kiss, and then sit there with their foreheads gently touching, bodies intertwined…in silence. The only sound is their breathing.
No words. Just love.
Fin. Or is it?