"Ya know Shawnie"
"Yeah Cor?"
"We coulda been rich!"
"How so Cor?"
"Predicting the future, we coulda been a traveling act 'the Amazing Cornelius and his beautiful assistant Veronica"
"You could have pulled off all the scarfs very well." "And you do know how to wear a jangly bracelet." "Thanks Cor"
-Flashback-
February 1999
"Man are we gonna have fun with this kid! I'm gonna teach him everything I know!" Shawn declares to the hospital waiting room.
"Then I'll bail him out of jail!" Cory follows up just as loudly. "Hey Mr Feeny, you're gonna have another Matthews to teach" he adds, turning to his mentor in one of the seats.
"Maybe he'll have a kid like me to sit next to!" Shawn laughed. -Present-
Shawn and Cory step up to the large desk in front of them and Cory opens his mouth "Hello, we are here to bail out Joshua and Riley Matthews and Maya Hunter"
-12 hours earlier-
Riley Matthews is sitting in the back of a beat up Toyota Corolla holding her phone up to her face.
"Hello to all my wonderful viewers! Especially you GeniusboyFarkthousand. Latest update on our AMAZING college visit roadtrip! We've just crossed into Pennsylvania with two stops left before we make it back home to New York City! Not to be confused with Buffalo, New York, which is a city in New York that isn't New York City. They also don't like it when you refer to New York as THE city. Apparently, there is more than one city in this country."
Suddenly a chip is thrown at her head. Maya is in the front passenger seat with her booted feet on the dash and her sunglasses pulled down.
"Riley! Shut it! No one is watching your videos and I'm sick of the behind the scenes version."
"I have PLENTY of loyal viewers that are FASCINATED by our journey! They are drawn in by all the emotional highs and lows of our dramatic international journey!"
"Spending three hours driving through Canada does not make it a dramatic international journey."
"No, but finding out Maya is on an international watch list that holds us up at the border for an extra 6 hours while they search our vehicle, our luggage... our cavities... rather dramatic" Josh piped in from the driver's seat.
"They searched your teeth Uncle Josh?" Riley asked.
"Yeah, I'm not welcome in Sweden either, Boing. Jury's still out on if they'll let me back to Romania" Maya said off-handedly
"BACK to Romania? You don't even have a passport, which didn't help getting OUT OF Canada, how did you get banned from two countries in Europe?"
Maya just smiled at him and started humming a tune that sounded suspiciously like the Huckleberry Bond theme.
"DAD!" Riley yelled suddenly from the backseat, jumping forward between the two of them and pointing.
The sudden shock caused Josh to swerve off the road and right into the sign declaring 'Welcome to Corry, Pennsylvania'
-Present-
"I'm sorry to say Mr Matthews and Mr Hunter, but I can't release them to you. It hasn't been decided if Mr Matthews and Ms Hunter will even be granted bail. The charges against them are quite serious and include malicious destruction of Public Property and assaulting an off duty police officer" the desk clerk at the station told Shawn and Cory solemnly.
"Topanga!" Cory cried out loudly, practically in the face of the desk clerk.
"She's not here Cor, she has to drive all the way from New York, we had a head start because we were in Philly" Shawn said, pulling his best friend back from the desk. "It'll probably be another two hours before she can be here."
"I can give you this one though" the clerk added as they went to find seats in the small space behind them.
The woman returned with a handcuffed Riley.
"Riley! Why are you still handcuffed? What charges is she facing?" Cory asked alarmed as he rushed to his daughter.
"Oh, absolutely none. She asked to be handcuffed and thrown in with the other two so they wouldn't get lonely."
"Hi Daddy, hi Uncle Shawn" then she burst into sobbing tears. -11 hours earlier-
"Here we are in beautiful Corry, PA" Riley said to her live video. The fallen sign and smoking Corolla behind her with both Josh and Maya trying to put out the small flames that were climbing up the hood.
"My dad always said he was a king, I wonder if this is where he was crowned. I look forward to exploring this fine town with you all, sometimes an unexpected detour is just what any good road trip needs."
"Duck for cover!" Maya yelled, diving on top of Riley as the live feed cuts to black. -Present-
RIley cried loudly and without stopping for the next hour, curled in her father's lap like she was 7 instead of 17.
Anytime, she tried to speak she burst into tears again so the two men stopped trying to get the story out of her.
"I don't like this Shawn. This feels bigger than the highjinks we expected. Riley's so distraught she can't even speak, and they aren't even letting us see the other two. I'm really worried. Topanga needs to get here quick. She'll know what to do."
-10 hours earlier-
Josh and Maya walk into the biker bar cautiously. It was the first business they came across after the car exploded. Riley, oblivious to her surroundings, walks past them and right up to the bearded, grizzled, tattooed man at the bar.
"I'll have a virgin rum and coke on the rocks please" she asks. He looks at her like she sprouted a second head and then pours he a glass of coke with ice and a cherry on top.
"I don't know if we should be here" Josh said to the girl at his side.
"Probably not, but there're not too many other places we can go that would be much better" Maya responded with her head on a swivel. Normally, she would feel just fine, even at home, in a place like this, but let's be real, Riley had no idea what she was stepping into, and Boing was way too pretty to be intimidating. Even with his leather jacket that Shawn gave him and Doc Martins and ripped jeans and face and... Maya had to shake her head and look away from the older boy. Can't get distracted.
"Hi our car just blew up the Welcome to Corry sign, and we were wondering if anyone could help us" Josh said to the man that served Riley her drink.
"Ugly sign, good job" the man rumbled before adding "Gil will be here soon, he's a cop."
The three of them sat there eating fried Buffalo wings and drinking cokes while waiting for this officer Gil guy to show up.
"I can't believe you actually eat the celery and carrots" Maya said mockingly to Josh.
He smirks at her and takes another bite of the hot sauce and bleu cheese covered vegetable sticks, crunching away.
Once the baskets of wings had been emptied and cleared Josh stood up to use the bathroom.
"I don't know how trustworthy this bathroom is going to be, so say a prayer for me"
"Will do Boing. I'll keep an eye on the nich as well" Maya said, imitating Eric Matthew's nickname for Riley.
He smiled and turned to the back corner with a dirty sign that said 'restroom.' The walls were plastered with half naked woman that clearly had their heyday in 1983. He took care of his business as quickly as possible, not wanting to leave the girls alone out there for too long. Not that he thought they couldn't take care of themselves. Or more accurately, Maya couldn't take care of them, but he'd rather they just not have to face any problems to begin with.
The last two weeks driving with them across 5 states and technically 2 countries gave a whole new insight into their relationship. He had seen how close they were before, but this not stop exposure to their friendship made him want to build a protective wall around them both.
One he was sure Maya would instantly scale just to show that she could. This bathroom had no soap... gross.
"Riles, you still got that hand sanitizer on your keychain...?"
Josh had his head down, but when he looked up he saw chaos. Riley was crying hysterically into the arms of the grizzled bartender who was yelling over her head at the fully uniformed police officer that had Maya clinging to his back as she tried to punch and kick him anywhere she could reach.
"Get this bitch off of my back!" The man yelled, and that's when Josh punched him in the face. -Present-
Topanga blew into the small police station like a tornado. "I demand to see my clients this instant."
She disappeared into the back rooms without even a glance at her husband, daughter, and friend.
Katy Hunter, who had ridden with her from New York sat down next to her own husband and took his hand.
"I thought I was going to die" she exhaled. "Does Topanga always drive like that?"
Cory just nodded, saying "yeah, that's why we live in New York, you can't get as many tickets for speeding on the subway. Though she's come close a few times."
Shawn turned to his wife, his eyes red with exhaustion and worry. "I don't know what's going to happen, I'm really worried. They wouldn't let us talk to the either Josh or Maya and Riley is so traumatized she just passed out after crying on Cory. I'm scared."
"Don't worry, Topanga has it covered. She was on the phone the whole drive here getting everything worked out. We have a secret weapon." Katy entwined her fingers even more tightly with Shawn's as she leaned back into the chair.
-9 hours earlier-
Josh and Maya sat on opposite sides of a wall of metal bars.
"What is wrong with you?" Maya yelled through the gaps in the iron while rubbing her wrists that had only just been freed from handcuffs.
"Me? You were beating the crap out of the guy. He was about two seconds from throwing you across the room. Sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you're not as big as you like to think you are" Josh yelled back, unsuccessfully wiping the ink from his fingertips with the bottom of his t-shirt. "And he called you a bitch!"
"I heard and he deserved everything I was giving him. But you don't even know what he did. You just walked over and punched him."
"Of course I did. Clearly he deserved it, if he did something to cause you to react like that."
"You didn't even ask what he did! You still don't even know!"
"It doesn't matter, he deserved it. I trust you Maya, you wouldn't just attack someone for no reason. So I say again, he deserved it" Josh huffed and sat on the bench closest to Maya's cell.
"You just trusted me."
"Yeah."
"Why?"
"Because I know you."
Maya sat down on the bench in her cell, right next to Josh. "I had a reason..." "I know."
"Your knuckles are cut and bruised."
"Yeah, yours too." He reached between the bars and took her hand, smoothing his thumb over her knuckles.
The door to Maya's cell opened then and Riley walked in, handcuffed. She sat down next to her best friend and layed her head on her shoulder.
"I can't be out there with them, so I asked them to put me in here with you."
Maya wrapped her free arm around Riley.
-Present-
Topanga stormed out of the back room and right up to an officer that happened to be standing nearby.
"I need a judge here right now. I am lodging a formal complaint against Officers Gil Grant and Hank Brown. Sexual harassment of a minor, drunken dereliction of duty, and that's just the beginning."
"Ma'am, I'm sorry, you can't just charge someone with a crime. You just showed up and you've provided absolutely no evidence."
"Do not try me. If you think for even a second I don't have the ability to take this entire department down..." she practically growled at the man.
"Deep breath Pangers, you don't want to get arrested next. Hi, I'm Senator Eric Matthews, and you're going to do exactly what my sister here tells you to do" a voice said from the doorway.
The usually goofy man was standing there with the most serious look anyone in his family had seen him wear in a long time. From the black suit to the stern security guard behind him, he looked every inch the senator he claimed to be.
"Just because you have some fancy politician in your family, doesn't give you the right to order people around here" the still nameless officer said, her back straightening even as she saw her career slipping down the drain.
"Officer, I appreciate that you won't be bullied by, quite frankly, the scariest woman on earth, and what I realize now looks like a corrupt shakedown. But trust us, when you see the evidence, you're going to want to arrest these creeps too. INTERNS!" Eric called out, and three teenagers who had been standing behind him stepped forward.
Farkle Minkus stepped forward and handed the officer his phone with a video already cued up. She hit play.
"Hi friends! Update on our wonderful stay in Corry, PA..."
-9 hours and 30 minutes earlier-
Maya watched as Riley pulled out her phone to make yet another trip broadcast. She had just hit record when an officer walked in and headed straight for her. He seemed to be a little unsteady, but with Maya's history she was naturally cautious around all uniforms so she hung back and let sunshine take care of this one. The cop got really close to Maya as he talked to her and she tried to lean her head away, clearly the man had some rancid breath if she was leaning that far back. Maya was creeping back toward Riley when the older man grabbed the younger girl's ass.
Maya did not even give it a second thought before she jumped on the officer screaming "you do not touch my friend."
When Maya saw Josh walk out she was sure he was going to pull her off the man, but he broke the guy's nose instead. Sending them both tumbling to the ground. Josh gave Maya a hand up, but left the officer clutching his face.
A second man showed up wearing jeans and T-shirt and pulled the officer off the floor. He took the handcuffs off the officer and put them on Josh first, and after fishing out a second pair, put them around Maya's wrists.
The off duty officer walked the two to the squad car and shoved them in the back. He turned to the clearly inebriated and now bloody man. "Get your drunk ass home and change into regular clothes. I'll fix the sheets to say your weren't on duty and I was. You owe me now."
Riley's phone was broadcasting the whole time.
Eddie the bartender picked up the phone later, looked right into the camera and said "I hope someone saw that and can help those kids out. I'll do my best, but the cops tend not to listen to ex-felons."
-Present-
Everything moved much faster after Officer Bridgeway, she had a name now, watched the recording. Twenty minutes later Maya and Josh were let out of their cells and had their possessions returned to them. They walked into the front of the station and saw their families waiting for them.
Only Shawn noticed they were still holding hands.