"Help! I need help! Somebody, please help me!"

Loki sounded in distress, I thought drowsily. I knew I needed to help him, but for some reason, I couldn't seem to open my eyes. I tried calling his name, but I couldn't talk either.

"Stay awake darling, we are almost there, stay with me, my love!"

I drifted in and out of consciousness as the poison burning in my body did its vile work.

"Don't you die on me now, you infuriating woman, don't you dare! Help! I need help!" Loki was practically sobbing, and my heart ached for him. But I felt my mind drift away before I could comfort him.

"What happened Loki, what is wrong with Sorcha?" Thor seemed worried for some reason.

"She's not breathing, I don't know what is wrong! I thought if I could just get her to Midgard she'd be alright, but she's not breathing, help me, brother! Please help!"

There was the sound of helicopters in the distance, faint and far away. I tried to say something to reassure Loki, but I passed out again before I could.

"You called in the Templars, Thor? What is wrong with you?"

"It's a good thing I did! Look at Sorcha, look at her Loki! She's dying! We have no healing skills between us!

IS ONE OF YOU A MEDIC? WE NEED A MEDIC RIGHT NOW!"

The helicopters were much louder now, and yet the sound seemed distant. I was neither warm nor cold, I couldn't feel much of anything at all. I had the feeling there was something I was supposed to do, something I had forgotten.

"I can't use Blood Magic on her, she is too far gone, it will take too much out of her. She is a Bee? Whatever is poisoning her is poisoning her faster than her Bee can restore her, it's negating its healing effect." I did not recognise the voice that was talking. "We could try letting her die, and see if she'll recover that way, but I'm not certain what will happen to her as long as this poison is attacking her body."

"Poison? We were attacked with shards of ice, not poison!" Loki sounded confused, his deep voice shaking with emotion. Suddenly he seemed to realise what had happened.

"Oh no, you foolish woman, you did not! You deranged creature, what have you done?"

There was the rustling of cloth and then I could feel someone trying to pry something from my hands. No! It was important I held on to what I was holding, I needed it for something! I clung on tight.

"Will you let go! I'll break your fingers if I have to!" Loki snarled. "Let go of that bloody staff, it's killing you!"

My fingers were too numb, I tried holding on but I couldn't.

"Aargh!" Loki exclaimed, followed by: "Stay away from that staff, its curse will kill you! Do not touch it!"

I suddenly felt cold again, so cold! I gasped as my teeth started chattering.

"That's it, darling! Breathe, breathe!" I felt Loki's arms around me, felt the sobs coming from deep within his chest.

For a moment I could almost see, my vision blurred as I saw the vague outline of Loki's dark hair against the snowy mountains. Every breath I took burned as if I was breathing fire. Every bone, every fibre of my body hurt. Then my world went blissfully dark again.

When I woke up I was at home, in my own bed. I had no idea how I had gotten there, or for how long I had lost consciousness.

"Hello, darling," Loki sat on the edge of the bed, holding my hand. His smile was wan, his hair a tangled mess and he had circles under his eyes.

"Hey, love," I whispered back, my voice hoarse. "How long have I been…"

"Two days, you've been unconscious for two days. I took you home, I didn't want to leave you in the care of the Templars. I don't trust them.

It all depended on whether you Bee was powerful enough to overcome the effect of the poison anyway, there wasn't much anyone else could do for you."

"The staff?" I asked. I tried to sit up a bit but my head swam.

"The Templars have it. They brought in a bomb disposal robot and used it to pick up the staff and bring it to Temple Hall."

"I'm sorry…" I whispered. I tried to reach out but I was too weak to lift up my arm.

"What were you thinking? I nearly lost you! You almost died! I wasn't supposed to be able to lose you, not that way! You nearly died, I thought I was alone again…" Loki's voice cracked as he buried his face against my shoulder. I wanted to hold him, stroke his hair, but I was too weak and my vision faded to black again.

It can't have been much later when I woke up again. The wardrobe was open, and there was a suitcase on the bed next to me. Loki was taking his clothes out of the wardrobe and stuffing them haphazardly in it.

"Loki?" my voice croaked weakly.

Loki stared at me, his eyes wild.

"You weren't supposed to wake up yet, you were supposed to stay asleep…"

"What are you doing?" my vision blurred again and I closed my eyes for a second.

"What am I doing? I am leaving! I…" Loki paced up and down the room, running his hands through his hair.

"I can't do this, Sorcha! I can't do this! I was never meant for this, I can't! I can't keep losing everyone I love, I can't do it!"

"Loki!" I tried to sit up but the room swam before my eyes. "Please…"

"I can't. I'm sorry, but I can't stay. You are better off without me. Live your life without me, find someone who isn't going to kill you by making stupid decisions!"

"Please don't leave me, please," I begged, resenting my own body, resenting how I could not even sit up in bed, let alone lift a finger to stop him. "I'm sorry about the staff!"

"The staff, you think this is about the staff?" Loki yelled at me, anguish plainly written on his face. Suddenly he stood still, a change coming over him. He became calm, his face a careful mask.

"Yes, the staff. This is about the staff! You are no use to me if you can not get me the staff! I don't love you, I never loved you, and now there is no reason for me to stay, is there?"

Tears began leaking from the corners of my eyes, I was feeling so weak, so sick, so confused. I had done everything Loki had asked of me, everything he wanted, and now he was leaving me?

"Oh, don't cry…" Loki's voice broke. "Please, be angry at me, yell at me, send me away! But don't cry, I can't bear to see you cry."

He sat down at the edge of the bed and took my hand in his.

"It is better this way darling, it is better if I leave. You'll get over me, you'll find someone new. Just let me go, please."

I could see the tears in his eyes, I knew he was trying to hide them but I could see them anyway. And I heard the pain in his voice, saw it written clearly on his face.

"Please don't leave me," I whispered again.

"I am sorry darling," Loki kissed my forehead. "It is better this way, trust me."

Loki stood up, closed the suitcase, and left the room without giving me another glance. And all I could do was lay in bed and cry.

"You are not leaving, Loki." I could hear Thor's voice rumble from the hallway.

"Stand aside, Thor, this is none of your business," Loki said curtly.

"This is my business. You are my business. Sorcha is my business. You are not leaving her!"

"What are you going to do to stop me?" Loki yelled back. "Hey! Unhand me, you big oaf!"

There was the sound of a scuffle. I tried to sit up and get out of bed, but my head swam and black spots appeared in front of my eyes.

"I told Sorcha I would stay around and look after her, make sure you would keep your promises. This is me, doing just that!" Thor thundered at Loki.

"And what? You are just going to keep me here in the hallway forever with Mjolnir on my chest?" Loki's voice would have sounded a lot sharper if he didn't sound so strained, presumably because Thor had weighed him down by placing Mjolnir on top of him.

"No, I'm going to get a rope and tie you up! Leaving you in the hallway would be a safety hazard!" Thor sounded smug.

What was going on out there? I stubbornly tried to sit up again. I almost made it out of bed but a wave of sickness overtook me, and as I fell back into the pillows, I lost consciousness once again.

When I came too Loki was lying on the bed next to me, gagged and trussed up with thick heavy ropes.

"Are we playing that game?" I muttered drowsily. "I'm not sure I have the energy to do all the hard work right now, love. Maybe we can swap places?"

Loki rolled his eyes, unable to say anything. I passed out again before I could give a second thought to how he had gotten tied up in the first place.

The next time I awoke I still felt weak, but my head was much clearer. Loki was lying on the bed next to me, reading a book.

"Weren't you bound and gagged earlier?" I asked suspiciously.

"Eh, no, you must have dreamt it," Loki lied.

"Loki!"

It wouldn't be the first time I would have had that dream but I could have sworn it had been real this time.

"Perhaps for a brief moment," Loki admitted. "I was able to talk sense into Thor."

They had fought, I remembered that too.

"Or maybe Thor talked sense into you?" I asked shrewdly.

"Maybe a bit of both," Loki conceded. "I promised I'd talk to you first before making any decisions."

"You were about to leave!" I sat up in bed, ignoring the black spots swimming in front of my eyes. "You were packing a suitcase!"

"I was." Loki took my hand into his. "I'm sorry."

"But why? You said you loved me…" my voice sounded so small.

"I do! I do love you! Laufey was wrong, she was wrong about that! You have to believe me!"

Loki shook his head, correcting himself bitterly: "But no, why would you believe me? Why would anyone believe me? When lies come more naturally to me than the truth?"

"I want to believe you," I said softly. I gently stroked his fingers with mine. "And you can't just leave me like that. Not anymore."

"I thought I had lost you," Loki said softly. His eyes weren't meeting mine, looking down on our entwined hands instead. "I almost did. If I had been a few seconds slower, if I hadn't noticed you had wrapped the staff in your coat…" He closed his eyes, then slowly opened them again.

"I kill people I love. People I love die and it is always my fault. Laufey died because she was weak from giving birth to me, Frigga died because I led the Fire Giants into Asgard. You nearly died trying to get me the staff.

I can't lose you, I can't lose you too."

"That is not true," I said hoarsely. "None of these things were your fault. They all happened because we made our own choices, not because of what you did. Laufey and Frigga made their choice, and I made mine."

"Be that as it may, I can't lose you, Sorcha. I wouldn't know what I'd do without you!"

"But if you leave, you won't have me either! You'll lose me anyway! And what about me, Loki, what about me? Do you think you are the only one who has loved and lost? The only one who knows what loneliness feels like?"

I could feel the tears burning in my eyes. I took Loki's chin in my hand and forced him to look at me.

"When I lost Jessie's dad I thought I had lost the love of my life. I spent years alone, trying to do my best to raise her with not a single thought of any happiness of my own. And then you came into my life, and suddenly I could feel love again, and joy, and desire!

If you walk away, if you leave, I won't die from a broken heart. Not because I wouldn't hurt, but because life isn't that kind. I will have to go on, alone. Again. And I can, and I will. Because I've done it before. But you will take the better part of me with you. The happiness, the joy, the passion, the laughter. All you will leave behind is an empty husk.

Is that what you want? Is that what you think is better for us? For us to go back to being lonely, broken empty husks that have nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to?"

Loki's eyes darted around, looking for an answer, looking for a sign.

"What if I'm not strong enough?"

"What if you are?"

"How can you trust me after what my mother said?"

"Then prove her wrong! Prove to me that she is wrong! That you love me, that I can trust you, that you want me for more than that bloody stupid staff I almost died for!"

I took a deep breath.

"Stay. If you truly love me as much as you say you do, stay."

Loki studied me for a second, always trying to read into my eyes, into my heart, to see what was truly there.

"You are relentless, aren't you? You truly never give up!" He said finally.

"Never," I admitted, and I smiled through my tears. Loki smiled back despite himself.

"You are the most infuriating woman I've ever met."

"I know."

"And I love you."

"I know."

I was grinning like a Cheshire Cat.

Loki sighed and rolled his eyes, but his eyes were laughing.

"Fine, you win!" He kissed me and got up from the bed.

"I'd better go and unpack than."