Gone

by CatDaddyAizawa

General Warning: This story holds lots of dark themes including alcohol and drug abuse, suicide, extreme emotional instability, and violence. It also contains graphic depictions of sex and death. If you read this, do not leave comments saying I did not warn you. Thank you.

It was all so sudden... Everything was going fine, everything was perfect, Piper and I were out on a walk, and I had walked away for just five minutes to get a coffee while Piper waited for me outside with the cats. When I came out, she was gone, as were the cats. I smelled the incredibly faint smell of blood in the quiet, dark street, and felt a pang of panic strike my heart. I followed it, and saw what had come to be my worst nightmare. Piper being strangled, forced to watch poor Yūta's neck be snapped slowly as the cat had started screaming just moments before, his small body being dropped to the ground. Piper refused to break, despite the tears of rage and despair welling up in her eyes. Eraser was already dead, and I saw her shaking.

I physically saw the moment that thread of patience snapped, the thread that had held strong for so many years, that kept her patient when I was needy for attention or on my bullshit of being mouthy and almost kitten-like, kept her patient through the years of healing and panic attacks and anxiety and nightmares, the thread of patience that helped her be the strong, wonderful veterinary surgeon she had worked to become. That thread snapped after so many years of being yanked on and sawed at, seeing our cats be killed was the straw that broke the camels back. I watched the calm rage, the focus, commitment, and sheer fucking will that blazed in her eyes as her entire body went still.

"You're dead." Was all she said, in a voice deeper, more growly, and with more concentrated rage then I have ever heard from her.

She suddenly bit the man holding her hard enough to tear out a chunk of skin while at knifepoint, his cries of pain being made only louder as she ripped the knife from his hand and stabbed him repeatedly in the legs, her right leg shooting out to knock the gunman unconscious. She killed the knifeman slowly, yet it seemed to happen in the blink of his eye, the knife landing a final blow in his right eye, directly to the man's brain and out the back, before she twisted it and pulled it out. Her heavy breathing was interrupted only by the splatter of meat and blood from her mouth as she spat the chunk of arm back into the dead knifeman's face. She was about to turn around when a gunshot rang out, deafening me to everything.

I saw her body slump forward as a bullet shot through her head, killing her instantly. I felt nothing for a few moments, my breath trembling as I just stared, before everything turned to a blur as I saw nothing but red, and the man's face of terror as I shot for him in a feral frenzy of rage, and next thing I knew I was standing over a horribly mutilated body, the face unrecognizable, my eyes only being lubricated by the tears silently streaming down my face, my hair falling from the deactivation of my quirk as I finally blinked out of this trance. I saw a huge splotch of blood in a dent on the wall where I had repeatedly smashed his face into the brick hard enough to chip and crack it. Both of the man's arms were broken, as was his neck, and his neck looked crushed and was bloody, as if I had stomped on it repeatedly. The man was wrapped tightly in my scarf, tight enough to have broken several ribs and suffocated him if he hadn't died from having his face slammed in, and I had kept going after the man was dead without realizing.

I had even gone as far as to carve 'You took my light' and 'Eraser Head was the one who took your life' into his back, in weirdly neat lettering, as if I had taken the time to sit down and use the knife beside him, the same one Piper had used to kill the knifeman, to carve those words into his back. There was even a neat little carving of my goggles, scarf, and blade in his chest. Now, I had killed many people before, out of self defense and necessity, but I had always made it quick and as painless as possible, but this... I had probably tortured him slowly by breaking his arms first, carving his skin, and then smashing his face once I felt he had enough. Or after I had heard enough of him begging for me to just kill him, I didn't remember which it was. I could hear his muffled screams echoing in my head, and I felt tears running down my face as I panted, looking over when I heard a breath.

I saw a woman standing there, and slowly released my scarf, letting the blood stained scarf fall around my neck. I had blood stains all over me. My clothes, my skin, even in my hair. I was the only person who left unscathed. This poor woman, I had no idea how long she had been there, but I didn't move as she pulled out her phone. I saw her flashlight go on, and I let her get a good look at me, at the tears that silently poured down my cheeks, at the bloodstains that covered my body. I just gulped and sighed shakily, looking down at Piper's body.

I squatted down and gently closed her eyes, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead and letting out a soft sob as I flopped down, pulling over the bodies of our cats too, starting to gently cry as I held onto their still-warm bodies. I took her seven rings off and placed the flexible ones gently on my fingers, and placing her promise, wedding, and engagement rings in my pocket since they wouldn't fit on my fingers, adding to the four I had on. I only popped up when I heard sirens, sniffling again and pressing one last kiss to her cold lips.

"I love you, my Flame..." I whispered, looking to the cats and giving them each a gentle stroke.

"And you, my little loves..." I muttered before quickly jumped up the walls around me onto the roof, running off and disappearing into the night, just like I've always been good at.

I made it home safe, and took off my boots outside the door, setting them in their normal spot and immediately going to the living room and flopping down in my usual spot. I turned on the TV and went to news to see if I had made rounds yet, and the first thing on was the news story about the murder of two males and a female, along with two cats in an alley. The female was identified as Piper Williams, and the males identified as Ivar Andersson and Edvin Lundberg. The killer, me, was unidentified, and Andersson had the words 'You took my light from me' and 'Eraser Head was the one who took your life' carved into his back with the same knife at the scene. The woman I saw with the flashlight was shown, she looked still in shock, which was understandable, and she was the only witness.

"He showed compassion and sadness for the woman and cats who were killed. I believe the woman and cats were killed by the men and he retaliated, in a fit of rage. I saw a ring on his finger, and he cried for them. He laid with her body and the dead cats until he heard sirens and fled. They were probably married. He didn't move or come for me when I started filming, he just looked heartbroken. He didn't look aggressive and didn't make any move to attack me." She said, in defense of me.

"What did he look like? Since you got a good look at him." The reporter asked.

"Long, curly and wavy black hair, dark eyes, pale skin, stubble, and he wore all black with this weird scarf around his neck. His right eye was scarred and whited out, too, and he was probably half blind. His eyes... They actually glowed red when he was killing the man, and his hair floated, and he had incredible control over the scarf around his neck like it was controlled by his mind. It was like seeing something out of a movie, or almost supernatural like. And he could jump freakishly high. It was almost like he was possessed for a moment or he himself was a demon or something." She said.

"How much did you see before you started recording?" The reporter asked, looking curious.

"Well, I saw most of it, but I couldn't move. He was completely silent as he broke the man's arms and carved those words and that mark into his back. He's probably Japanese since he wrote in Japanese and looked Asian. He had the look of someone who has killed before, since there was no remorse or shock once he finished. He slammed the man's face into the wall until it was beyond recognizable and stomped his neck after wrapping him in that scarf. He didn't notice me for about five minutes until he came out of whatever he was in.

I felt terror as he looked over at me, but like I said, he just seemed lost and looked like he wanted to die right there alongside the woman and cats he avenged. He even closed her eyes and kissed forehead before he laid down with her and the cats, and kissed her lips, and said something to her and the cats before he ran off. He climbed the walls of the building in an almost demonic way too. I think the man that was killed pissed off a demon by killing his human love." The woman recounted, and I shuddered as censored pictures of the scene were showed, more tears pouring down my face. I had no impulse control at this point, and immediately thought of alcohol.

Standing and turning off the TV, I put my shoes back on and went out, locking the door without changing my clothes. I put on a mask on my way out and put up my hood, starting to run. I ran to the nearest open liquor store, walking in and quickly picked out two bottles of a good, strong whiskey, Spirytus Stawski at 96% alcohol, walking up to the counter with tears still pouring down my face. I saw the TV on in the background, and the police sketch of me popped up. The clerk looked away from the TV towards me, immediately freezing.

"Y-You're him, you're the one that killed those men..." He said softly. I nodded and sighed deeply.

"They killed my wife and cats. I'm no demon, don't worry. Now please, I just want to drown in my sorrows tonight, I'm not going to do anything stupid, and I don't want to hurt anyone. I'm normally very mild mannered and I just had a fit of blind rage." I said, tossing my card and ID onto the counter.

"O-Okay... Um... I'm sorry... f-for your loss..." He said shakily, clearly still fearful, as he swiped my card. I nodded and took the bottles of whiskey and my cards, tucking them back into my phone case compartment.

"Thanks. I'm gonna go drink my sorrows away and sleep for awhile... Night..." I muttered, walking out. I ran back home and took off my boots, putting them back in their spot and locking the door, grabbing a piece of paper and a pencil from my office, sitting down and turning the TV back to the news. I saw that the man at the liquor store had only called the police after I left and had time to get pretty far, and the news had showed up shortly after. I wrote my suicide note while listening in the background.

"Here we have a man who got to speak to our killer first hand. Sir, what was he like?" The reporter asked.

"God, I don't even know how to describe it. I saw the police sketch just before I turned around to see him, and he didn't seem to care about anything anymore. He told me those two had killed his wife and cats, so that woman was right that they were married, and he told me he had killed them in a blind fit of rage, and he said that he was no demon so I know he's probably seeing this.

He said he just wanted to drink his sorrows away and sleep for awhile and he bought nothing but two bottles of Spirytus Stawksi and left. I was really fucking scared at first, but he just looked dead inside, and he was still crying and looked one wrong word away from breaking down. I actually just wanted to hug the poor guy. He didn't seem like a demon at all, just a really, really sad dude. Maybe he does have powers, or maybe I really did meet a demon tonight, but all I know is that he's devastated and tired." He said. I opened the bottle of whiskey and took a few gulps, not even bothering with a glass of any kind.

"Did he say anything else to you before he left?" The reporter asked.

"Well, he told me he wasn't going to do anything stupid, but he really just looked like he had nothing left to live for. He hadn't even changed his clothes or washed himself off and he reeked of blood. Have a feeling he's probably just going to drink and cry himself to sleep tonight. I just want to give him some peace, so I let him go." He said. I sniffled and let more tears pour down my face as I took another few large gulps of whiskey. I was already starting to feel the effects just ten minutes in as the TV played in the background, and I had consumed half of the first bottle by then. I didn't bother pacing it, I wanted to die, so I quickly drank down the rest of the first bottle and left it on the coffee table, getting up and taking the second bottle with me.

Setting it on the beside table, I got undressed and put my dirty clothes in the hamper, getting a chain from the small jewelry box inherited from her mother, placing her wedding and engagement rings on it and placing them all in the ring bowl on the dresser, going to the bathroom. I took a quick but thorough shower, feeling myself getting more and more intoxicated by the minute, but luckily I was still coherent and could function while drunk, so I actually managed to get dried and dressed and do a load of laundry while my stomach worked on the first bottle of whiskey. I did nearly puke a few times, but I kept it down as I waited, scrubbing the bloodstains out of my scarf. I managed to stay awake through the drier cycle and hanging and folding of the fresh clothes, brushed my hair, sprayed Soba's tank down with water and refilled her water to make sure she would be okay until police arrived, sprayed the bed and myself with teakwood cologne, placed all of my rings back on with the necklace of rings around my neck, and climbed into bed, getting my phone out and going to my contacts.

Going to the group chat, I sighed shakily and popped open the second bottle of whiskey. I had already had enough to give me alcohol poisoning, I really just wanted to hammer it home to kill me as I sent my final text to them.

:Piper, Eraser, and Yūta were murdered tonight. I killed the man who killed them in a blind, sadistic fit of rage and now I'm in bed, with enough alcohol in my system to kill me. I won't wake up tomorrow, so I'm sending this to you all to say goodbye now, before I pass out. I love you all so, so much, and I am proud to call you guys my kids, and Hizashi, Yagi, and the other teachers my friends. Thank you all for so many wonderful years of friendship. Goodnight, and goodbye, for good. Maybe I'll see you on the other side, if it exists. I love you all.:

I sent it, turned on Do Not Disturb, and turned off my phone, setting it aside as I chugged the rest of the bottle of whiskey in under an hour, setting the bottle aside with my suicide note from earlier and laying down. I could barely see or hear anymore, and I could feel myself fading as I hugged Piper's pillow, my flow of tears never once stopping until I finally died, having been crying in my sleep for 45 minutes before my heart and breathing stopped.

I was confused when I heard a beeping, steady and slow, and it was cold. I felt something in my hand as I slowly came to, eyes cracking open to a bright room. I had a pounding headache and I was horribly nauseous, but all I could feel was anger. Had I not died in my sleep? What the fuck? Why am I in a hospital? I heard the beeping speed up as a deep growl left my throat, but my headache pounded worse and I was forced to relax when my blood pressure spiked from the anger that coursed through my body.

I looked over when the door opened, and I think I finally understood when a tall, blond man in glasses walked into the room, hair pulled back into a bun. He wore a white v-neck and jeans and had a stupid mustache and bright green eyes. I'd recognize him anywhere, but I didn't think this was actually my universe, since he didn't seem to recognize me, and none of my students or the other teachers were here.

"Um, sir, are you alright? I found you in an alley on my way to work and called an ambulance for you. Are you alright?" He asked, and I sighed heavily and rolled my eyes into the back of my head with a deep groan, flopping onto my side, facing away from him.

"No... My wife and cats were killed last night..." I mumbled, looking at the cat-themed ring on my finger that I hadn't dared to take off.

"Oh, shit... Dude, I am so sorry. No wonder your breath smelled like alcohol, damn... How much did you drink?" He asked.

"Well, I thought it would be enough to kill me... Clearly not... I just hope our snake and horses are okay..." I muttered, looking around for my phone.

"Gods... You had alcohol poisoning and you've been out for two days, so it's definitely been longer than yesterday since she died." He said, gently setting a hand on my shoulder.

"What day is it today...?" I asked softly.

"October 17th." He responded, pulling his hand off my shoulder.

"Our anniversary was in 14 days... She died on the 10th, the day after her birthday..." I whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the ring as I shakily sighed.

"And it gets worse... Do you have a place to go? Maybe I could take you out for dinner with some of my friends to help you feel better." He said, and I thought about it for a bit before shrugging.

"Sure, why not...? I don't really have anywhere to go anyway..." I muttered.

"What do you mean? Don't you have a house?" He asked.

"Well... She was the owner, I was just a househusband since I'm disabled... from PTSD, and this was basically just 9 years of healing undone in the blink of an eye." I said, crossing my arms as I moved back to my back, staring off into the distance.

"So you'll lose your home anyway since you definitely can't work in this condition..." He muttered, and I nodded in response.

"Besides, I'm not even from here." I said, and he looked at me funny.

"What do you mean?" He asked, head tilting.

"I'll explain at dinner. I need food. I have a headache." I said, sitting up and pressing the call nurse button

"Um, okay. It's about 5 so I'll text my friends to meet us. What are you craving?" He asked as my stomach growled.

"Well, my wife's cooking, really. But, I guess ramen will have to do since the next best thing is my own but I am in no condition to be in front of anything hot or sharp right now." I said, and he nodded.

"I know a good place nearby." He said, and I nodded and looked up at the nurse came in.

"Am I safe to be discharged?" I asked, and she came over and looked at my chart.

"According to your earlier blood alcohol content and how long it's been, yes. I wouldn't recommend it but I can get you discharged within the hour if you have somewhere to be." She said, and I nodded.

"Okay. Discharge me please, I really need some fresh air and I'd like something that is not hospital food." I said, and the nurse nodded and went for my hand. I held it up so she could take out my IV, and once I had a bandaid on it she walked out to get my discharge sorted.

"Okay, all of my friends can come so you can have some people to talk to." He said, and I nodded in thanks, laying down and curling up on my side.

"I'm exhausted... I might nap while my discharge forms get sorted..." I muttered, but the tears came first, and they came pouring down freely without a sound.

"Hey, wh- Oh, hey, hey, it'll be okay. Maybe I can help you find a place to live, I don't want you out in the streets." He said, gently rubbing my shoulder.

"That'd be nice..." I muttered, sniffling and wiping my face on the pillows, trying not to start bawling my eyes out like I wanted to. I felt the pressure of emotion physically in my head and face, and wanted so badly for it to go away.

"Do you want a hug? Would that help?" He asked, and I thought about it for a moment and nodded, moving to sit up carefully, opening my arms. He carefully hugged me and I let myself silently weep into his shoulder, holding onto him tightly. It just wasn't the same, but it would have to do.

"Thank you for being so kind to me... The world was so harsh for so long until I met her... She was the biggest light in my life before she was taken from me... I need a little kindness right now..." I whispered, sighing shakily and gulping, swallowing a sob that threatened to make itself known.

"It's okay, that's what being a decent human being is." He said, rubbing my back softly. I nodded and held on for a little bit longer before letting go, wiping my face gently.

"It's okay to cry whenever you need. And you can ask for a hug whenever you need, too. You're very huggable by the way." He said, keeping an arm wrapped around me.

"My wife called me her teddy bear..." I said fondly, gently fidgeting with my wedding ring.

"That's very sweet. I like your rings by the way." He said, and I held my hand out for him to see.

"I really love cats so she bought a cat themed one for me. She had the ones on my necklace, these are her promise, wedding, and engagement rings. Both wedding rings have a quote inscribed on the inside that says 'My love can never be erased'. My other rings also have quotes inscribed too, and all of the ones on my right hand and on this necklace are hers, except for my engagement ring on my right ring finger." I said, pulling off one of flexible rings made from my scarf that was coiled up my right middle finger to let him see it.

"'My love for you will bind us forever'. Awww, that is really sweet. What do the others say?" He asked, so I pulled off the other bendy metal ring that coiled up my right pinky finger and took off the necklace to let him see the other rings

"'I hope to be bound together forever', 'Our love is my light', and... 'My love is erasure-proof'. Oh my god, these are the sweetest..." He muttered, handing them back.

"She bought the engagement rings and had them inscribed. Mine matches. I made the coily rings and bought her this promise ring, and mine say different things." I said, handing him my own scarf-made rings.

"'Your love binds my broken heart together', 'Our love knows no bindings'. That is literally the sweetest thing I have ever read." He said as he handed the rings back to me. I placed them back on, my fingers and neck having felt very naked, and wondered what the fuck Hizashi was doing. Is he dense? Or just not telling me he knows? Hopefully the latter.

I was about to say something when the nurse walked in with my clothes and phone.

"Alright, you're discharged. You can leave whenever you're ready." She said, setting my clothes on the bed for me, putting my boots on the floor.

"Thank you." I said, giving a respectful bow of my head and standing, gathering my clothes.

"I'll let you get changed." Hizashi said, standing and leaving the room, shutting the door behind him. I got dressed, wrapping my scarf around my body under my shirt, the pressure feeling nice on my body, and opened the door, a hand in my pocket.

"Ready to go?" He asked, and I nodded and started to follow him and the nurse to the entrance of the hospital. I bowed to the nurse in thanks and followed Hizashi out, really wishing I had a hoodie. I stopped when I noticed I didn't smell like teakwood, silently whimpering.

"Hey, is something wrong?" Hizashi asked as I hugged myself.

"One, I feel naked, I need a hoodie of some kind, two, I don't smell like my comfort scent, teakwood, and both would be really helpful right about now." I said, rubbing my arms.

"Well, let's get you a hoodie and then we can try to find you teakwood cologne or something tomorrow. Is that okay?" He asked, and I nodded and kept walking. He took me to a shop and I found the largest plain black hoodie they had, along with a pack of hair ties, and we were out in no time, myself much calmer with my new hoodie.

"You're looking a little better. You ready for dinner?" He asked, and I nodded and kept following, until we got to what was actually my favorite little hole-in-the-wall restaurant. They had super good ramen, so I happily followed him in and made a beeline for the floor table, disregarding the seat and removing my shoes to sit in seiza with my legs spread, which I had gotten far more comfortable with over the years and can comfortably hold it for about an hour before I start to have pain, an hour and a half before I really have to move and stretch my legs.

Hizashi came over and sat across from me, and it wasn't long before the other teachers showed up and sat with us. I had left the corner seat beside me for Aizawa so he could be off in his own little world if he wanted, and everyone got situated.

"I just realized I never got your name. I'm Yamada Hizashi. That's my best friend Aizawa, and this is All Might, Cementoss, Snipe, Thirteen, Vlad King, Ectoplasm, Midnight, and Hound Dog." He said, motioning to each person as he introduced them. I gave my damaged, blind eye a gentle rub with a soft apology, saying it got really dry, before clearing my throat.

"Okay, don't start yelling when I tell you this." I said to Mic sternly, before sighing heavily and showing my posture to slump.

"The name's Aizawa Shōta. I'm shocked you didn't say anything sooner, Mic. I gave a lot of hints." I said, holding up my fingers to show my rings, with the necklace held up on my thumbs. Mic stopped and stared me directly in the face, maybe trying to see if I was lying, and it was silent for a solid thirty seconds before Mic yanked all of my rings, including my ring necklace, off of my fingers and from my neck and read them out loud, slowly, before tossing them on the table in a pile and leaning back, arms crossed as I went to replacing my rings.

"I am so dumb. The promise ring is shaped like your fucking goggles..." He said softly.

"Not exactly dumb, just denser than those ultra compressed weights we had to wear for the finals in first year. Also, don't handle these so roughly, goddamn, I can't get new copies of these and have them be as special as they are." I said, pulling my rings back on and pulling up my shirt to expose the scarf wrapped around my torso.

"You also somehow didn't notice this when the nurse brought in my clothes." I said, dropping my shirt as I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Wow I am really not observant today." He said, leaning back in his chair.

"Wait, Aizawa can actually feel romantic love?" Midnight asked.

"I mean, yeah, eventually. It takes literally the exact right circumstances for it to happen, but yes." I said, nodding, tapping my rings together so they made a soft clinking sound.

"Now, how did Mic find you? We weren't exactly told the whole story." All Might asked.

"Okay, long story short, some universe swapping involving some science shit I don't feel like even attempting to explain right now happened, and he found me unconscious. I thought I was dead. I had actively tried to give myself fatal alcohol poisoning by drinking two whole bottles of Spirytus Stawski because the love of my life, the woman I married, and our two cats had been murdered literally before my eyes, I went into a silent blind rage, quite literally killed the gunman, since the knifeman, who was holding the badass my wife was before she was shot hostage, was killed in self defense after she was forced to watch both of our cats be murdered.

So, yeah, suicidal thoughts happened, I kinda became a wanted criminal for a minute, accidentally scared the shit out of a woman who watched me murder this dude in probably the most brutal and barbaric way imaginable and a poor clerk at the liquor shop who recognized me from a police sketch, and I probably died of alcohol poisoning and ended up here for some reason. I don't really remember much else... It's... all kind of a blur but it happened within the span of four or five hours. I was definitely dead within three and a half because both bottles of whiskey were gone in under three." I said, fidgeting with my wedding ring as I refused to meet anyone's eye.

"Oh gods, I can't even begin to imagine the pain you felt. I honestly don't blame you for any of it." Midnight said, and I nodded and sighed.

"Nine years of hard work, healing from PTSD and C-PSTD, gone... In the blink of a goddamn eye..." I muttered, sighing deeply as I gently stroked over the black opal cat in my silver ring.

"I'm so sorry... How many years did you know her?" Vlad asked.

"Nine. Next week would have been our 6th anniversary..." I said, pulling out my phone and going to the news stories of my world, showing them the initial news story of 'three people and two cats found dead in an alley, killer unidentified'.

"This was the first news story. A woman saw what happened and actually defended me, telling how, once I came out of the blind rage, I cried for the cats and woman who died, guessing correctly that we were married. She told how I wasn't aggressive when I noticed her and instead completely ignored her, and that I looked heartbroken. She could tell I didn't do it while in an emotionally sober state, and that emotions took over and I lost it. However, this is kind of funny, my quirk activated but they don't have quirks in that world, so she thought I might have been a demon. She also saw me using my scarf to hold the guy down and saw me scale up the side of a building to get away. She also said the man I killed may have pissed off a demon by 'killing his human love' I think she said." I explained, then went to the news story of my sighting at the liquor store.

"This clerk I accidentally terrified also stood up for me, telling how I looked like I had just given up, recounting what I said about wanting to just drown in my sorrows and sleep for awhile, before I just left. He said I didn't seem aggressive at all, and police never actually showed up at my house even though I had given the dude my ID and he identified me to the police according to this article. Unless they followed his wish for me to just have peace for a night before I was bothered. Well... too late I guess. He said I didn't seem like a demon but might have been, and just knew that I was devastated and tired." I muttered the last bit before shrugging, going searching for a third part and actually finding it quite easily.

"Wow. I mean, I've been forced to kill out of self defense before, but that's brutal. On your emotions, I mean, watching the love of your life be murdered before your eyes is already bad enough. I'm actually glad they didn't show up to arrest you immediately. And... it is mildly amusing that they thought you were a demon. I will admit that." Aizawa said, giving me a gentle touch to the shoulder.

"Me too, honestly. I just hope our snake and horses are okay. I told in my suicide note to make sure they go to sanctuaries or good homes, especially since Soba is a very elderly Ball Python. She's 28 now, I think, they only live to be about 30." I said, humming softly and pulling up the third part of the news story.

"Here's the third part. Killer and thought-to-be-demon or possibly possessed known as Eraser Head, identified as Shōta Aizawa, found dead in his own home with two empty bottles of whiskey in the living room and on the bedside table. Cause of death is alcohol poisoning. A tear-stained suicide note was found on his bedside table, and it reads:

'My name is Aizawa Shōta. I killed a man tonight, the very man who killed the love of my life. The man known as Ivar Andersson shot her in the head after killing our two cats. She had killed the knifeman, Edvin Lundberg, in self defense after being taken hostage in the alley the five were found dead in. I tortured Ivar before bashing his face against the wall so many times he was unrecognizable, and stomped his neck until it was a broken, bloody mess, barely attaching his head to his shoulders. I had carved my code name and the reason he lay dead into his skin. Ivar had been harassing Piper for years, even after we got married.

Piper saved me. She saved my heart, my mind, my soul, and I cannot live without her. She is my reason to be awake, my reason to be alive. This is why I let myself drown in my sorrows. Drown until my very last breath and the very last beat of my heart. Please make sure our snake, Soba, and our horses, Suwabe and Levi, go to wonderful homes. Soba likes rats and will not eat mice and the existing set up may be used, and Suwabe and Levi are to never be ridden with a bit, and are never to be hit with a crop or retrained. They are perfect as they are. Goodnight.'

Andersson had "you took my light from me" carved into his back and the name "Eraser Head was the one who took your life" carved into his chest, along with an image of goggles, a knife, and what appears to be ribbon. Both witnesses say Aizawa wore the ribbon-like material as a scarf, and the woman said he used it as a binding tool to hold Andersson down before he was killed. The clerk from the liquor store said he appeared to use it as a comfort tool, hiding his face in it and holding onto it as he left.

Friends of Williams's say he was never seen without his scarf, and that he was incredibly mild mannered, quiet, and devoted to his wife. A statement by a close friend of Williams', who will only be known by Elisa, said: 'Aizawa was never one to lose his temper, staying patient, calm, and quiet no matter the situation. He was really sweet to her and loved her more than anything. He was always with her unless she wanted to go out with a friend alone. Sometimes he would just... watch, from a distance, but it was never malicious, he was just making sure she was safe and happy without having to interact with anyone since he was super introverted and could go months without seeing anyone but her. He was like a house cat who didn't really like anyone but her. He never lied to her, and respected her more than anything or anyone. I feel like he'd rather commit seppuku than cheat. He'd honestly rather die than live without her.'

Another statement by another close friend of Williams, who wished to remain anonymous, says: 'Aizawa was really stoic around everyone but Piper. He was incredibly loving and affectionate in private according to what she told me. He was polite and preferred to keep to himself when around other people, but he also couldn't really understand us anyway since he didn't speak great English until recently. His favorite thing, other than Piper, his 'kids', even though they weren't really his kids, he just had come to love his old students like his own, and cats, were naps.

He was usually asleep at least half the time I saw him and he was either cuddling one or both of the cats or cuddled against Piper in some way. Closest thing I've ever seen to a cat in human form. He may seem really scary but he was just this really gentle, rational, blunt, down-to-earth dude who wouldn't hurt anything bigger than a bug, and even then, I've never seen him kill even a spider. The only thing he'd hurt is your feelings, and even then it was an accident of misunderstanding his tone or wording, or not being able to take how blunt his wording was. Even he admitted he was a little harsh at times.'

Aizawa's personality was made clear, and he had been through years of therapy and treatment for trauma, having been diagnosed with C-PTSD and PTSD at 35 years old. He has shown legitimate remorse and compassion for others on many occasions, told by the doctors and specialists he's worked with over the years. His primary psychologist said this when asked about how he was during treatment:

'He was stoically anxious, in a way. He's had anxiety his entire life and was used to hiding it, so it took awhile but he's had anxiety attacks and full blown panic attacks in my office. Nothing could console him so I had to call his spouse every time it happened, and she, the angel she was, would even leave work to come help him through it if she wasn't right outside the door. I know he was never a psychopath or sociopath because he wasn't obsessive like he seemed on the outside, he told me he was protective from a distance to make sure she was safe because of how many losses he's had in his life, which is reasonable. Piper did what she wanted and he never objected, and if he was there would just watch if he wasn't a part of it.

He definitely had issues in the beginning, many of them, he was anxious and paranoid and had a lot of troubles with sleeping, getting either too much or not sleeping at all, and depression hit really hard for him once he was settled in Piper's house, but he got far, far better over the years. I have a feeling she was the main thing that helped him get to where he was. The final day he walked out of my office after five years, he was confident, and had this strong, solid energy you only see in people who have a rock solid emotional foundation. I hoped to never see him again in my office, since he's come so far from the paranoid, anxiety ridden, severely depressed and sleep-troubled individual he used to be.

I've seen them interact before on many occasions, he was affectionate and loved her attention, loyal, devoted, and would do anything for the love of his life. She had the same energy towards him, they were the perfect couple and made it through hardships on both sides, they both had emotional issues, but they never had one fight from what I could tell. They were incredibly patient with each other and always were there to support each other. Nothing could break those two, and I've never actually seen a healthier relationship. Not one insult, not one quip, never a raised voice unless it was out of passion, and there was never a spark of anger between those two.

It was all laughs and support for each other, no matter the pain whether it was emotional, mental, or physical, and they loved to have deep talks late at night about things most couples don't even touch. They were emotionally intelligent, knew each other to the deepest corners of each other's personalities and morals and political views. I honestly don't blame people for thinking he was a demon, it was almost like he was bonded to her. But, no one should blame him, they were basically twin flames and he was a re-broken man shattered beyond repair.'

It has been made obvious from this gentle giant's drastically improved mental state that this murder was an accident, a moment of overwhelming emotion from the loss of his beloved spouse and cats. Friends and witnesses believe that if he hadn't had died that night, he should've been left in peace and not been prosecuted for any crimes. He was buried beside his wife and cats on October 15th, 2048." I read, before I scrolled back to read the date on the article.

"Even my fucking psychologist is kind of in on the demon thing. Damn. Hold on, this was from three days ago. I must have come here only after I was buried. Huh." I shrugged and put my phone away in my pocket.

"Well, at least you had support even after death. Sounds like you really loved her more than anything, huh?" Hizashi asked, and I nodded.

"Yeah, I did. And still do. I don't think I'll ever find anyone like that again. I might never actually love like that again... that whole circumstance happened by a nonzero chance so close to zero it was virtually nonexistent. How often do you just get thrown into another universe and meet someone who knows exactly who you are, what you're like, and how to interact with you?" I asked, crossing my arms. I had forgotten about my hunger for now.

"Wait, who you are? What do you mean by that?" Aizawa asked, ever observant.

"Yeah, I should probably mention that, to her, this universe comes from a manga series with an anime adaptation, several movies, two spinoff mangas, a book series, an Ultra Analysis and an Ultra Archive, and even video games and trading cards called Boku no Hero Academia. She knew me better than I knew myself at the time and correctly diagnosed me as autistic. Which explains a lot of my weird behavior." I said, scratching gently at my jaw.

"Oh- Yeah, that would explain it." Aizawa said softly from beside me, and I felt my stomach finally start up growling again.

"It's just... I never pictured you'd be in this situation. I never pictured you as a married man, Aizawa-kun." Ectoplasm asked, head tilting. I didn't mind being addressed with -kun honestly, Piper did it so I found it cute.

"Well, it happened. I'm much more experienced in life now that I'm 43, almost 44, holy fuck I'm old. I even have a prosthetic leg since I had to chop my own off in the middle of battle since I got hit with a quirk destroying bullet. Shigaraki did the eye damage a bit later on the same battle. I dunno, all I know is that I'm a heartbroken motherfucker who needs to just cry his heart out for awhile once in the privacy of myself and no one else and then maybe sleep properly for like a day instead of being in an alcohol induced coma. And I know that I seriously need food. Since I haven't eaten in at least two and a half days, more than a week if we're counting the time spent being dead. Also, please, just Shōta is fine, no honorific needed." I said, waving him off.

"Sounds like a good idea to me, what do you want? I'll go order it for you. And I'll cover your bill." Mic said.

"Chicken ramen with a side of rice. And just water to drink is fine, thanks." I said, and he nodded and got up to go get our order and pay after getting what everyone else wanted.

"You look incredibly tired, Shōta. Maybe you want to lay your head down for a nap until food is here? Maybe conserve some energy?" Thirteen recommended, and I nodded a bit and moved so I was crosslegged, laying my head in my arms. I let my eyes close as Mic sat back down with us, and I tried to sleep. The teachers kept it down as I fell asleep, and all was well, until I started to have an incredibly vivid nightmare of the exact events that happened that night. I watched Piper get shot again, and again, and again, as if stuck in a loop, but I couldn't wake up, no matter how hard I tried. I couldn't move or look away, as it ended just before I moved to attack Ivar and restarted. I felt just as terrified, if not more, with each loop, the gunshot ringing through my head over and over and over again.

I suddenly startled awake with a sharp, shaky gasp, grabbing the wrist of whoever was shaking me awake. Fuck was I lucky it was All Might since the crushing force with which I grabbed onto the nearest person would have probably shattered the wrist of anyone with a normal bone structure.

"Ouch. You are a lot stronger than I remember you being." All Might said, only coming out of his muscle form when I let go, gently drying the tears running down my cheeks with a soft sigh.

"Sorry, I've been working out and eating better for awhile. I guess nightmares are going to be a thing again..." I muttered.

"That's okay. I'm just glad I'm the one you grabbed onto. Is your hand okay? You started biting yourself in your sleep." He said, sitting back down. I looked to my bleeding hand and used a napkin and a hair tie as a makeshift bandage before rolling my sleeve down.

"I tend to hurt myself in my sleep in an attempt to wake myself up. I've gotten so used to it at this point it's a habit I don't even feel anymore. I started sleeping with a night guard that would keep my teeth shut since I get very mouthy in my sleep when uncomfortable or scared. I started chewing through blankets, pillow cases, clothes, or whatever else I could manage to get my mouth on." I said, rubbing the back of my neck since that was kind of an embarrassing fact to admit.

"It's probably a primal comfort thing, honestly. When sleeping, if you can't wake up, what else is it supposed to do?" Cementoss asked. I shrugged and hid my face to yawn, seeing our food was brought over just as I finished. I sniffed it first, having gotten into a habit of doing that, and sat back to let it cool. I had also gotten into a habit of not eating until Piper started, and I knew the exact temperature she could start eating at, so I idly stirred mine slowly, occasionally sniffing it and feeling the side of the bowl.

"Um, Shōta, you can start eating. What are you waiting for?" All Might asked.

"I've gotten used to waiting a few minutes before I start eating. Piper was really sensitive to temperature and I never wanted to start eating without her. I've gotten used to food being warm rather than hot." I said, trying a bit of rice and starting to eat. I didn't even touch my ramen until I finished every grain of rice, placing down the bowl and trying a bit of broth. Nodding in satisfaction, I started to slurp away at my noodles happily, not paying a lick of attention to the world around me until I did a quick atmospheric check before I started on the broth.

"You're funny, Shōta. You know that?" Mic asked, and I put down my empty bowl, laying my chopsticks down since I had completely finished.

"How so?" I asked as I took a few small sips of water, licking my mustache clean.

"I dunno. You just get so focused on eating you didn't hear a word we said, did you?" He asked.

"Nope." I responded, feeling a bit tired now that I had a warm belly full of food.

"Damn. I asked about your tattoos. I really like them." Mic said, so I pulled off my hoodie for everyone to see.

"I have more on my left leg, back, and chest." I said, pulling over my water and taking a sip.

"Holy- You weren't kidding about working out. You're titties are bigger than mine!" Midnight exclaimed, hand immediately going for my chest, and I spat the entire mouthful of water back out, choking on it as I put my glass down and coughed violently.

"Oh, ow, that hurts, but thanks. I did that purpose." I said, unable to help the smile and soft chuckles as I covered my face.

"Can I touch it? I really wanna touch it." Midnight said, and Mic seemed just as eager.

"I hugged him earlier, he is literally so soft when relaxed." Mic said, and I sighed and leaned back.

"Fine, but keep it short." I said, very glad I had my scarf under my shirt since I felt cold from the sadness I still felt and my nipples were rock hard from the cold. Probably gonna workout to exhaustion and hump a pillow until I pass out tonight just to help me sleep.

Mic giggled to himself as he came over and poked my titty a few times. Midnight full on squished my other titty before poking my stomach a few times.

"Wow, that is all muscle, nothing here is fat. You are a chunky muscular." She said, and Mic was happily feeling up my bicep.

"This is what my life has come to. Letting different versions of my best friends touch me like this. Yep. Totally normal." I said, flexing my entire body as I cracked my neck and arched my back a bit, stretching my tight, still tired body with a massive sigh.

"Yep. I'm just not used to seeing you like this. You're so attractive now I wouldn't be surprised if you have women, even men, all over you." Mic said, feeling down my back.

"Okay, you can stop molesting me now, thanks. It's getting weird." I said, gently taking their hands off of me before I stood up and stretched again, cracking my knuckles. I hummed a bit and plopped back down, twisting to crack my back and cracking my toes before pulling my boots on, standing, and sinking into a toe squat. My knees cracked before I was satisfied and stood up, pulling my jeans up by the belt loops.

"Uh, you comfortable now?" Aizawa asked as I pulled my hoodie back on and reached into my pocket, pausing when I didn't feel a mask.

"Almost. My face feels naked." I said, pulling out a big section of my seemingly infinite scarf and breaking it off, tying it around my face as a makeshift mask.

"That's a little better. I'll have to pick up some masks later on. I've gotten into the habit of never having my face exposed in public. And Mic, could I have or borrow a pair of really good, waterproof earbuds with really strong bass? I'd prefer not to sit in silence anymore." I said, securing my scarf behind my head.

"Sure thing, Shō! I'll buy you some. And, if you're not planning on sleeping in the streets, come stay at UA in the teachers' dorms. If you don't have your ID or if it doesn't work we can get you a new one." Mic said, getting up and patting me on the shoulder gently.

"Thanks." I simply said, pulling some of my scarf out to wrap around my neck and shoulders, hiding me more.

"Now that everyone is done eating, let's get back to UA. We have to get you some necessities on the way there anyway. We can pick up some clothes for you, too and go properly shopping for you tomorrow." Mic said, tugging at my sleeve.

"Alright, alright. I don't really need much. I only have two things I'm definitely going to need to actually sleep though. Weighted blankets and ultra strength melatonin. I don't even need a bed, I'm honestly happy with a shikifuton and a tatami mat. Other than that, I just need some clothes and hygiene products really. However, I have become picky about my hair and skincare products but I'm not really savvy in brands here. I know what works for me at home so I can try to find equivalents here." I said as I followed him out with the rest of the teachers.

"Me? Picky about my hair and skin? I don't believe it." Aizawa commented as he strolled alongside me.

"How do you think I got these curls? My hair is naturally curly about halfway down, I was just never taught how to take care of it to actually get those to show. I don't actually wash my hair anymore, I just scrub with my fingers to get rid of any excess oil or dirt and condition everything at and below the neck to prevent buildup on my scalp. I'm about 9 years in and my hair has never looked or felt better. Split and dead ends are virtually nonexistent." I said, and Mic wasted no time going for my hair.

"Well, you aren't oily at all and you don't stink, you just smell how hair is supposed to smell and I didn't even notice and I'm right next to you. Plus, your hair is actually super soft so it doesn't appear to be a bad thing. Super shiny too. It looks healthier than mine. Maybe I should stop washing it since I have to shower every other day or risk looking like a rat dipped in grease." Mic said, and I looked at his hair and ran my fingers over the top of it, my hand coming away feeling slippery. Definitely in need of a shower.

"Ew. I had that problem for the first few months after I stopped washing it but my scalp adjusted. I basically had free moisturizer for months. I only washed it once or twice a week prior anyway, the rest was just to wash off my body since I was sweaty and gross from the day. But my conditioner was either shitty or nonexistent, so there was a big lack of definition. I actually need a trim really badly, it looks much thinner at the ends than it should. I get it trimmed every anniversary since that was the day I chopped off half of my hair to get rid of all the old stuff. It was a very freeing experience." I said, flicking a bit of hair over my shoulder.

"Yeah. Chopping off like three inches should do it." Mic said, and I nodded and pulled my hair back into a messy half-bun, just to get it out of my face. I sighed softly and cleared my throat, rubbing at the eye I could actually see out of gently. I felt myself wanting to go completely mute, ready to just be done with people all together for now, so I went silent, only making soft noises of acknowledgement, shrugging, or making yes or no noises when spoken to or asked questions, having completely retreated into myself for now.

"I'm thinking we should save any shopping for tomorrow, Mic. He's not looking too good. I can just order stuff online for him and pick up any essentials that he'll need today. I'll take him myself to get anything he needs tomorrow." Aizawa said softly to Mic, who agreed after taking a good look at me. He must have noticed my slumped, tired posture and whatever look I held in my eyes, I wasn't even sure. I felt my body growing weak from the agonizingly powerful anguish and despair that had started coursing through my veins, my muscles, my very bones and nerves. My body hurt, especially my right eye and leg stump, despite my prosthetic being several years old and healed properly from the procedure.

I didn't even realize how much I had started slowing down until I felt a gentle tug at my arm. I looked up just a bit to see Midnight, very gently and with a soft, caring tone to her voice, urging me along and that it wasn't much longer. I felt so weak I couldn't even speak to argue that I needed a break, just allowing myself to be tugged along. I just hoped I could make it to a dorm room without puking.

"I'll pick up a weighted blanket for him, you guys make sure he gets back to UA safe and is situated. If you can get him to talk tell me how heavy for the weighted blanket." I heard Aizawa say, and he was about to veer off in the other direction when I grabbed his scarf with a shaky hand.

"16 kilos. And the strongest melatonin chews you can find." I managed to get out, and he nodded, walking off when I let my hand fall.

I tried my best not to hardcore dissociate on the way home, yawning gently a few times. I pulled out my UA ID and waved it under the gate to see if it would trigger anything, cautiously stepping through when I got nothing, blinking a few times at how the hell that worked, but I didn't even question it. Instead, I went off to the dorms with the other teachers, really having trouble even seeing straight, and I nearly tripped a few times on my way up the stairs to go find an empty dorm despite going up on all fours since the weakness in my muscles had gotten worse.

After entering the dorm, I didn't even care that there wasn't even a bed, laying right down and resting. I wouldn't be moving for awhile, so I closed my eyes and just... dissociated. My mind went blank, and I felt nothing. I had no idea how much time passed, but I only started to come out of it when I really had to pee, so I got up and crawled to the bathroom, locking the door behind me and carefully pulling down my jeans and boxer briefs. After I finished I took a moment to give my dick a quick wash with a bit of soap and water since I hadn't done it in three days and I needed to at least try to keep somewhat clean. After I was dry and dressed, I washed my hands and splashed some cold water on my face to shock me awake a little more, feeling my stomach growl, and I felt really thirsty. I just decided to say fuck it and gulp down a bunch of water from the bathroom sink, sniffling a bit.

Shaking off, I sighed and left the bathroom, opening my dorm room door and looking down, seeing two weighted blankets, a shikifuton with a kakebuton, a trifold tatami mat, two pillows to go along with the cases, and a bag with toothpaste, a toothbrush, a jar of melatonin, a two pack of eyedrops, the earbuds I asked for, a two pack of black masks with a wire in the nose, and a set of teakwood scented hygiene products including conditioner, body wash, shea butter, lotion, cologne, and body spray. I dragged them in and set up my bathroom, kind of, as well as my bed, and sprayed myself just lightly with the teakwood cologne before exiting again, going downstairs slowly. I didn't even know what time it was, but it was completely dark out judging by the windows I passed, but I still heard voices in the common room. Going in, I saw all of the teachers except Aizawa sitting around, drinking, the TV on as they watched a movie.

I still felt disconnected, and I was definitely still mildly dissociated, but I moved completely silently as I made my way to the kitchen. No one seemed to notice me since I was not acknowledged, so I silently slinked into the pantry in search of food. I didn't feel like eating, I didn't want to do anything, really, so I just got myself a bowl of cereal since it was quick and easy, standing at the counter while I ate as I watched whatever the others were watching from there.

I didn't bother sticking around, instead washing my bowl and spoon once I finished and slinking back up to my room, locking my door behind me and undressing completely, shutting the curtains, and laying in my bed. The weight of the blankets on me was comfortable, but it was too warm. I didn't have the energy to get back up and go downstairs and ask for it to be cooler, so I just laid there and whined to myself about it, kicking the blankets off. I started to cry at the absence of weight, getting my phone and typing in Aizawa's number, just to see what would happen.

:My room is too warm, is there any way I could make it like... really cold? I'm used to it being closer to 15° or colder. I'm too hot under just my weighted blankets and I am totally naked.:

:I'll see what I can do.:

I waited a bit and it started getting a lot colder pretty soon as I took 20 mgs of melatonin, hoping it would give me an extra kick to sleep. I wrapped up in my weighted blankets and sighed, comfortable, and texted him a quick thanks before putting my phone down and snuggling the pillow I was given, reaching over to the bottle of teakwood cologne and spraying both pillows along with myself again. Finally comfortable, somewhat, I laid my head down to try to maybe sleep.

It was an extremely rough night for me, I was woken up by the sound of gunshots every time I started to drift off, and at four in the morning, I got frustrated enough to give up. I started to gently hump the pillow I was hugging instead, holding onto my head pillow as I ground against the soft material. I started to pant softly as my cock slowly got harder and harder, having to curl up to spit on it a few times so I didn't start chaffing. I moaned softly into my pillow as I humped away, stroking and twisting my nipples slowly.

I whimpered and actually started crying as I humped at my pillow, this was a sad desperation hump, no love or compassion towards myself, feeling nothing but despair as I sobbed into my pillow and kept grinding.

"Mommy... I miss you... I need you... Fuck... Why do I have to be alive..." I whimpered out barely above a whisper, grabbing my scarf and wrapping it around my neck, pulling it tight in a slip knot and tying the other end to my foot, pulling on my neck hard enough that I couldn't breathe at all, giving release only when my vision started going dark, and doing it all over again. I drooled all over my pillow, slurping up the mouthful of spit every time I release and gulping, heavily panting until I got my breath back, and then choked myself again.

I did this for three hours, having came over and over and over again, begging for release from this pain, sobbing the whole way as tears soaked my face and the pillow until I had ground and cried to exhaustion. But I still couldn't sleep. I couldn't move, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't even lift a finger. I just laid in my own cum, glad I washed my dick earlier so at least I wasn't adding onto more filth. I was dehydrated from crying, sweating, and drooling, I was hot, sweaty, and growing cold over the hour I just laid there, unable to do anything but shiver.

Finally, I managed to move something, but that was only because my body was begging for water and warmth, so I managed to drag my ass out of bed, crawling weakly to the bathroom hauling myself up to the sink. I drank a bunch from the tap, washing my groin before I forgot and got an infection, and while I was up, I kicked my own ass into washing my pillows and pillow cases and leaving them in the sun on the porch to dry.

I still hadn't really gotten dressed in more than a pair of underwear and I had a tender bruise forming on my neck from choking myself on and off for three hours. I heard a knock on my door and groaned a bit, reaching for my jeans.

"Hold on, hold on... I'm not dressed..." I grumbled out, pulling on just my jeans, hoodie, and scarf, not bothering with my shirt before I pulled myself up and went to the door, cracking it open.

"You look terrible, did you sleep at all? And I brought you breakfast." Mic said, I took the plate of pancakes and glass of milk with a moody growl and kicked the door in his face, well, tried to, but he put his foot in it before I could get it to close.

"Answer me truthfully." He said, prying the door back open against my weak resistance.

"No. I kept waking back up to the sound of a gunshot going off in my head." I said, going back to my bed and carefully sitting down, starting to eat without another word.

"Well, I'm going to stay with you until you finish and then you're coming with us teachers to school. We want to keep an eye on you. We warned class 1-A not to speak to you because you're not doing good and to just leave you alone. But you aren't leaving our sight. We decided that last night. All Might was tempted to take your scarf but I said that was a bad idea. We checked in in your regularly last night and only knew you were alive from the crying we heard this morning. We didn't hear anything you actually said but we know you're in a lot of pain. Being alone won't do you a lot of good." He said. I felt my right eye twitch but I said nothing, only letting a soft, deep growl come from my throat before I resumed eating.

"I'm sorry, but after telling us you fatally poisoned yourself with alcohol, we just want to make sure you aren't trying to find other ways to end it. It'll get better, maybe you can talk with Hound Dog today or another time when you're ready." He said, rubbing my shoulder. I didn't say anything in response, just drinking down the glass of milk he brought me. Once I licked my lips clean, I pulled my shirt over and pulled it over my head, stuffing it down my scarf and pulling arms into my hoodie, pushing them back out through both arm holes. I also put in some eyedrops since my eyes were so goddamn dry, before I sighed deeply.

"Fine, just don't expect me to really want to go anywhere or do anything..." I muttered, opening the pack of masks and slipping one on, adjusting it to snuggly fit my face, along with a spray of cologne on my wrists, neck, and inside of my mask, and getting my plate and glass. I followed Mic out into the common room, doing my dishes myself and even putting them away, ambling over to the couch and sitting down. I pulled out my phone to look at the time, seeing it was only 8:00, School didn't start for another half an hour.

Hmm... I'll have to ask the support department to make a charger for me. I don't think a charger that would fit my phone exists here. I thought, pulling my feet up to be in a crunched position, shivering gently as I just stared off into the distance. I stayed like that for the entire half an hour we had until we had to leave, and Aizawa was the one to alert me that it was time to go, and I slowly stood up and followed, hands never leaving my pockets.

I absentmindedly followed Aizawa to the 1-A classroom, barely remembering the trip, I was just following my muscle memory of the way there, and I forced myself to focus he entered the classroom.

"Now, as you were warned, someone else will be joining us today. Try not to speak to him or ask questions, he had a tragedy happen just recently and is in bad shape. He's only here so I can keep an eye on him since it's dangerous for him to be alone at the moment." Aizawa said, looking towards me, and I took that as my cue to step in, looking towards my class as I looked over them. God they look so young and innocent and adorable, especially Midoriya, fucking Christ did that kid change.

"Just call me Shōta. No honorific needed." I said gruffly, face buried in my scarf before I took a shaky sigh, body still trembling. I couldn't help the slightly fond look in my eyes as I looked over my kids, despite the unsettled looks I got, probably from the scarring on my eye. Midoriya's hand shot up, and I gently quieted Aizawa with just a look when he went to scold the boy before nodding to say he could speak.

"You look... uncannily like Aizawa-Sensei. Could I ask your family name?" He asked, looking a bit shy about it, but I didn't reprimand him, instead giving him a gentle look.

"It's a long story. I'll make it as short as possible. So, your teacher and I are the same person from different universes, lots of science and quantum physics I'd rather not attempt to explain. I'm 12 years older, at 43, almost 44. This is my second time swapping universes, which the chance of this happening once is so close to zero it's virtually nonexistent, yet this is round number 2 for me. First time, I was... thrown? I'm gonna say thrown, into a universe where everything in this universe, and my original one, and every other universe identical to my original one, was a manga with an anime adaptation, a book series, a few movies, some games, even, along with an Ultra Archive and an Ultra Analysis called Boku No Hero Academia, which was incredibly popular about 15-20 years ago, and still well known." I explained, and I got silence for a moment before Bakugō, weirdly enough, spoke up.

"Yes, Bakugō?" I asked, raising a brow.

"How popular was I?" He asked, and I sighed and rubbed my face gently.

"I should have known you'd ask that... I'm not even sure where in the timeline we are... You placed first in every poll except for the first in both the Japan and US polls. Now, I'm gonna let class get started, I hopefully won't be a distraction to any of you. Try to pay no attention to me." I said and moved to the corner near the door, sliding down to sit in seiza and just hanging out there, earbuds in and music on. Once the bell rang, Aizawa started class.

It was nothing exciting, and eventually he flopped down in his sleeping bag as normal and passed the fuck out for awhile. It was Ashido and Kaminari who had the nerve to approach me, despite Iida trying to get them back to their seats. I had moved onto my back in a beetle-like position, knees to my chest with my phone held above my face as I searched for music, having been listening to Enormous Penis, I Pissed Myself, I Shit Myself, and Lucille Bogan's songs on loop to feel a shred of happiness from how fucking funny these songs were normally. I put my music on pause and looked over my phone at them, pulling out an earbud to see what they wanted.

"We just wanted to ask if you're okay. You... You look more tired than Sensei and you recently had that tragedy, so, we just wanted to check in on you." Kaminari said, fingers tapping together gently.

"...I'll... I'll be okay. I had an incredibly major loss, I won't go into detail, but I will say I'm not allowed to be alone or in front of anything dangerous at the moment, considering what I did before I appeared here... All I will say about that is that I shouldn't be alive because of what I did to myself." I said sadly, not even bothering to sit up or hide it. Midoriya came over and cautiously squatted down beside me, seeming to be searching me for any sign of recent injury, so I sat up, keeping my neck hidden, and let him silently inspect me before he sat down beside me, seeming to be contemplating something.

"Whatever it is, Midoriya, you don't have to hesitate to tell me. I don't exactly have the capacity or energy to really be angry at anything right now. Even then, what could you do that would make me mad?" I asked, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. This innocent boy with a heart of gold deserved the world, what the world did to him, how hard he pushed himself because he felt he had to because of how the world treated him was what made me mad.

"Um... Could I tell you something...? Out... Out in the hall?" He asked quietly, so I stood up offering him a hand, my paternal instincts overriding everything. He took it and stood up, and I led him out into the hall, closing the door behind us. I sat down and offered him the spot beside me, letting him take his seat and ponder for a minute.

"Um... Back in middle school... Kacchan... he... he told me... to take a swan dive off the roof and..." He paused there, but I knew what was next.

"Hope for a quirk in the next life..." I muttered, and he nodded, sighing.

"I know. You know, I died by alcohol poisoning... because the love of my life was shot, and our cats were killed before my eyes... I was married, for nearly six years... next week is our sixth anniversary..." I said softly, sighing and sniffling a little.

"Oh, Shōta... I am so sorry..." He whispered, and I rubbed my eyes a bit.

"It's okay... It'll be okay, eventually... However, I do want to say something I may regret telling you later... She was held at knifepoint, and she killed the knifeman after our cats were killed, but she was shot in the head... I went into a blind rage and killed the gunman... brutally, barbarically... He wasn't even recognizable by the time I was done... A woman saw me do it and I think she called the police, but when I turned on the news, she defended me, recalling how I looked absolutely heartbroken and like I was ready to give up...

I went to the liquor store and bought two bottles of the strongest whiskey I could find, and accidentally terrified the cashier since he saw my police sketch before turning around to see me. He actually let me go and get pretty far before calling the police, and then defended me, repeating what I had told him to the reporter. I had told him I just wanted to drown in my sorrows and sleep for awhile, and I told him I wouldn't do anything stupid. He told the reporter and the police he thinks I should at least have peace for a night.

I overdosed on alcohol that night, drinking two full bottles of 96% alcohol whiskey, and was found dead the next day by police next to a suicide note I had written... I'm just so, so glad you never went through with it, Midoriya. You would have never been able to become the greatest hero of all if you had." I said, gently rubbing his back.

"You must really love her... I'm so, so sorry she died..." He said softly.

"Thank you. I do. She was the light and love of my life, I will probably never love romantically again, especially since I didn't know I could before I met her. She is the only person I've ever loved romantically. Now, my 1-A students, love them to death, they're like my children, my friends, love them too, would protect them with my life. But her, she was different. She lit a flame inside me that grew bigger and bigger, until it consumed my heart in a passion and love I had never felt before. That motivated me to really try to start getting better and getting over the losses in my life and get over the years of trauma I've had since I was a kid.

I was doing really really well for years, I looked great, I felt great, I was happy as could be as a househusband honestly. I didn't have to interact with anyone if I didn't want to and I was perfectly happy staying at home with the cats and doing whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. She helped me improve myself as a person. I just... I hope I can continue that without her and that I don't fall back into old habits..." I muttered, sighing softly and yawning a bit.

"Well, you have the teachers and us to talk to. You aren't alone." He said, smiling up at me.

"This isn't a burden you kids should take on for me, kiddo. But, I do appreciate it. Thank you." I said, giving him a soft look.

"Of course, that's what friends are for, right?" He asked, and I sighed and couldn't help myself when I hugged him close, tearing up again and gently stroking through his thick, curly hair.

"Eh-?" Was all he could manage to get out, before he hugged me back and, seeming tiny against me.

"Midoriya... You are so pure and innocent and cute and... I missed you, and the others... I was separated from you all... Now that I can actually see you and touch you and hug you, it's really nice... You changed a lot and this innocent kid full of hope and energy disappeared... You all changed so much... There... There was a war, I got this scar here and lost my leg." I said, pulling up my pant leg to show my prosthetic.

"Really? Could... could I touch it?" He asked. I qnodded and offered more of my prosthetic for him.

"You're a lot more open and obviously caring than Sensei is." He observed as he poked at my leg.

"Yeah, that's the handy work of my wife. I was so, so beyond in love, no words could describe how I felt with her. She and I... we had something most couples could only dream of having. Never one argument between us, we had some playful bickering here and there but it was never serious and there was a few playful insults here and there but it was all in good fun. No conflict either. People called us boring, but there was nothing but love and trust and loyalty between us.

If I put myself down or insulted myself whether it was something about me or about my looks, she would literally grab me by the face and tell me to shut up and that I was perfect just the way I was, and then give me a kiss to the forehead or lips. Very aggressive affirmations but it worked, since she beat it into my head as many times as it took since grabbing me by the face and getting in my space really made me listen to what she was saying instead of just rejecting it out of shyness or my own self image. I'd start laughing when she did it and cuddle up to her and just bask in the wonderful feeling of being complimented." I said, leaning my head back. I hadn't smiled once since she died, normally I was smiling every day.

"Well I'm glad she made you feel better about yourself. She sounds wonderful. I would have loved to meet her." He said, and I saw the smile on his face.

"She was. Now, get back to class. I don't want to get in trouble because I pulled you out and he noticed." I said, flicking my head towards the door. We came back inside the classroom and I noticed Aizawa was still out cold, so I plopped back into my spot from before, Midoriya going back to his seat happier than before, and I finally decided now was a good idea to turn notifications back on. I had over a thousand texts and more than a hundred calls, so I put my earbuds back in and decided I'd read back up the texts and let everyone know I was alive, since more were coming through so I was just hoping I could send them back.

Hizashi: 'Shōta what the fuck do you mean by that? This is a prank right?'

Midoriya: 'Dad? Wait, try to induce vomiting, have some water and sleep, you aren't thinking about this rationally!'

Shinsō: 'Dad? Don't you fucking dare I swear'

Yagi: 'Aizawa?! Please, we can talk about this!'

Kaminari: 'Dad, please, wait!'

Hizashi: 'He's not answering calls, it's going straight to voicemail'

Todoroki: 'Wait, dad, please, don't go'

Bakugō: 'FATHER I SWEAR TO FUCK DON'T YOU DARE'

Ashido: 'Dad! Please don't go!'

Shōji: 'Please, if you can see this, do what Midoriya said'

Iida: 'Please, Sensei, you can think about this rationally in the morning, don't drink any more, throw up what you already drank, have some water, and get some sleep'

Yagi: 'Not answering any of my calls either...'

Midoriya: 'Wait, guys, he could just be asleep. Don't freak out yet. He's probably been crying for awhile and has some alcohol in him so he's probably just sleeping it off'

Hizashi: 'But what if he's not?!'

Midoriya: 'Then... I guess he made his decision...'

Thirteen: 'Aizawa? Please, don't do this...'

Vlad: 'I didn't expect him to take something like this this harshly...'

Shinsō: 'Shit... Please Dad... don't go... You're my hero, you're a hero to all of us! Without you we never could have become the heroes we are today!'

Mineta: 'Wait, what happened? Did something happen to dad?'

Midoriya: 'He said he had enough alcohol in him to kill him... Piper, Yūta, and Eraser were murdered tonight, just a few hours ago. He killed the man who did it and now seems to be waiting to die with them'

Mineta: 'WAIT WHAT?! Mom's dead?! And dad's just going to wait to die too?!'

Shinsō: 'Well, he did avenge them all... But please, dad! Listen to reason! You can get through this, it'll be okay!'

Bakugō: 'DAD. PICK UP THE FUCKING PHONE.'

Ashido: 'Dad please answer!'

Aoyama: 'Dad...?'

Kaminari: 'Please pick up dad! You can't leave us like this!'

And there was hundreds more begging me to stay, and I read them all, not even noticing the bell rang and their next class had started. Eventually, the chat had gone quiet for a few days, everyone seemed to be reeling from my death, until someone noticed I had set my status to online. I copied the links to the articles of the murders and my death, sending them in and saying nothing else. I had almost started crying again at the begging for me to stay, the realization that I was gone, and the several day long silence with the occasional begging of me to come back, blinking away the tears with a sigh. After a few minutes, I decided to send a little something.

'I am so, so sorry...'

5 minutes pass.

Hizashi: 'Who is this? Do you have Shōta's phone or something...?'

'No. I'm alive. I did die, in my sleep. I felt nothing, so don't worry, I didn't suffer any physical pain. I woke up in a hospital in another HeroAca universe after I was buried in my own. They literally will not let me out of their sight and I haven't actually been alone for more than probably half an hour. I was secretly checked on all through last night. I'm sorry I didn't text you all, I was dissociated and couldn't function at all, hell I barely moved this morning or last night and barely had any coherent thoughts for the past 16 hours. I didn't sleep at all and cried for three hours this morning after giving up on attempting to sleep. I had been in the hospital in an alcohol induced coma for two days.'

Shinsō: 'Dad, give yourself a fucking break. Your wife and two cats just died what probably feels like less than 24 hours ago for you and you committed suicide by fatal alcohol poisoning after killing the man who killed the love of your life. Please just rest.'

Hizashi: 'I want photo proof this is you.'

I took a quick video of the classroom and Cementoss teaching his class, before sending a picture from my spot on the floor, where I had moved to lay on my back again.

Hizashi: 'Holy shit... It really is you! Shōta don't ever scare us like that again!'

Midoriya: 'Dad...! We missed you so much!'

Ashido: 'I'm crying again, anyway- Dad I love you and missed you so much!'

'Love you too, kiddo. I'm so sorry.'

Kaminari: 'Don't apologize, you had no rational thought going on at all'

'Absolutely none. No impulse control either. My brain could have told me to set myself on fire and I probably would have just done it honestly'

Mineta: 'I mean at least you went out without suffering physically'

Vlad: 'Glad your back, Aizawa'

Yagi: 'Aizawa-kun! I'm glad you're alive!'

Iida: 'Sensei! You have been greatly missed!'

Shinsō: 'We love you and are all happy you aren't dead anymore'

Midoriya: 'Love you dad'

Kaminari: 'We love you! ❤️'

Satō: 'I'm gonna bake a cake to celebrate your return! Wish you could be here to eat it!'

Yaoyorozu: 'Sensei! You look terrible but I'm glad you're back!'

'Thanks lol I know I look like total shit. Haven't brushed my hair or teeth yet, still working on getting food and water into my body at regular intervals and actually leaving my room to eat.'

Shinsō: 'And that's okay. Take all the time you need, dad.'

Asui: 'The mom in me is kicking in. I'd absolutely help you out with everything you need, dad'

Yaoyorozu: 'Me too! Your hair is already beautiful, I could braid it to help you feel better!'

Bakugō: 'GOD FUCKING DAMNIT DAD I MISSED YOU. DON'T LEAVE US LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN.'

'That's very sweet of you two. And Bakugō, don't worry, I won't. I was being stupid because I couldn't think through the despair and agony clouding my judgement.'

Bakugō: 'Good... Missed you dad. Love you.'

'Love you too, Katsuki.'

Midoriya: 'Awwww. Making dad even softer than he was. How sweet'

'I am a fucking squishy blob of emotions and will cry if that is a joke, Izuku, that better not be sarcastic.'

Midoriya: 'It's not. It's actually really cute'

'Whoops.'

I was crying at being called cute now. For fuck's sake...

Bakugō: 'Are you gonna be crying more than Izuku did as a kid?'

Midoriya: 'Ouch'

'Maybe. I'm incredibly sensitive right now so poking me one too many times could probably make me start sobbing, honestly. If I'm not disconnected as fuuuuuuck like I was for hours yesterday. It was literally dark when I came back to full consciousness, it had probably been at least 7 hours that I had laid on the floor, dissociated beyond any type of processing. I only grounded because I really had to pee and was hungry- Oh, hold on. Give me a second.'

"Shōta? Are you alright?" Cementoss asked, and I wiped my eyes on my sleeve and nodded.

"Fine... just texting my students and friends from my universe. Letting them know I'm okay." I muttered, nodding that I was okay.

"Alright. Just making sure." He said, nodding and going back to his lesson.

'Sorry, Cementoss was making sure I was okay. I had started crying again'

Jirō: 'Awww, dad, that's really sweet but also kind of sad'

Midoriya: 'Yeah. You should talk to Hound Dog, or anyone that will listen really.'

'I'll be doing my best to cope. Don't worry too much about me. I'm surrounded by people, literally will not be left alone no matter how badly I want to hole up in my room for like a year, alone, and just hibernate.'

Mic: 'Well I'm glad you can't do that, Shō, that wouldn't be good for you'

Asui: 'Don't do that, dad. That won't help'

Iida: 'That is a terrible habit, do not start getting into that, Sensei'

'Couldn't if I tried, kiddos. I appreciate the concern, though.'

Midoriya: 'We love you, dad. We want you to get better and be happy like you used to be'

'I love you all too, and I will be eventually, probably.'

Bakugō: 'Take care of yourself dad. And don't die on us again.'

'I won't. What I really could use a long trail ride and a free ride gallop through a big ass field at night in the cold. It's so hot here, I'm not used to it being hot and humid anymore.'

Shōji: 'That sounds like fun. I've always wanted to do that ever since Piper sent that first video of you finally able to free ride bareback and bridleless at a gallop. It looked like a lot of fun.'

'The amount of freedom I feel doing it, it's like you feel invincible. Until you get thrown off because your horse spooks lol. That happened, absolutely destroyed my original prosthetic leg. I was going to get it replaced anyway, but like now I had to. I like my new one better anyway, no phantom pain or itches since I have actual nerves in this one and can feel touch in this leg. It's nice. The whole having to get it drilled into my bones and attached to my nerves wasn't the most pleasant but it's better than phantom pain and itches. Anyway, I'm gonna go for a bit. I'm actually kind of interested in what Cementoss is talking about lol'

Speaking of itches, I kicked off my boot and sock and used the toe of my other boot to itch the bottom of my prosthetic foot, before putting my sock on my hand and violently rubbing my palm on the bottom of my metal foot like I was trying to get out a particularly stubborn stain, before I was satisfied and pulled my sock and boot back on.

"Uh, Shōta? You okay?" Cementoss asked, and I nodded again.

"Yep. Just an itch. My prosthetic is attached to my nerves so I may not get phantom itches or pain but I can't be gentle when this foot gets itchy. I'd be using a wall corner or carpet depending on the location if I didn't have sock and boot handy. Be glad I didn't start using the podium. This shit sucks." I said, having not moved from the position on my back.

"Huh. I suppose having a prosthetic kind of sucks sometimes, yeah?" He asked, giving me a kind look.

"Uh huh. I'll tell you some horror stories of accidentally kicking things and being debilitated because I forgot I can actually feel in this foot again later if you want. I have broken my prosthetic toes before on several occasions. And may or may not have caused damage to the things I kicked." I said, holding up my fake foot.

"Sounds entertaining. Class is almost over. Do you want to stay here or come back to the teacher's work room with me?" He asked, and I thought for a minute before humming.

"Eh, I'll come with you." I shrugged, rolling up onto my ass and stomping my right foot, glaring at it when it decided to send me cramp signals.

"Really? I don't even have muscles in this thing. Where and why are you cramping? Stop it." I growled at my robotic foot, which was seizing in my boot before I remembered I was probably dehydrated as hell just as my other leg started to cramp. I hissed and tried to stand to stretch the cramps out, having to slowly stretch out both of my feet and encouraging Cementoss to just ignore me as I used the wall for support, and eventually I could get the cramps out and walk, even though it took awhile, and I waved goodbye to the kids as I followed Cementoss out, having a bit of a trotting motion to my walk because it loosened up my feet and ankles and felt better on my calves since I was walking on my toes.

We soon got to the teacher's work room, after Cementoss asked me about why I was walking like that, and we entered, myself immediately finding a place to squat down fully. I had to do it slowly because of my tight calves, but I sighed fully with a soft groan once I got there, giving a thumbs up when asked if I was okay.

"I'm having dehydration leg cramps..." I muttered, and immediately had a water bottle thrown at me by Mic, which I caught and glared at him for a moment as I screwed it open and pulled down my mask.

"That was kind of rude, but thanks, I guess." I said, chugging the entire thing and pulling my mask back up, crushing the bottle and tossing it in the recycle bin across the room.

"There, happy?" I asked, and Mic gave a nod of satisfaction. I stood up, humming a bit, and pulled off my boots and socks, setting them neatly beside the couch.

"I had a little quirk awakening in my time and actually learned a little something cool." I said, using my incredible jumping ability to spring up into the air, activating the float part of my quirk and settling in the air once I had started to fall back down, eyes glowing gold and holding it despite blinking.

"Wait, you can float? I didn't know you could do that." All Might said, head tilting.

"Yep, just like Shimura Nana. I'm starting to think we might be cousins or something. I dunno. But yeah, I can hold this as long as I want since it isn't affected by me blinking. When erasure is activated, when I blink I essentially erase my own quirk, but I've also basically taught my DNA to recognize my own Erasure and have become immune to it. And I've learned something else pretty cool. I learned to subconsciously use this floaty radius I have to reflect the quirk rays from my eyes in every direction, using the air particles, like how air particles scatter light and heat, almost, and can erase the quirk of anyone who isn't covered or hidden from them. I have become 100x more dangerous and I'm not even a pro hero anymore goddamnit." I chuckled, allowing myself to suddenly drop and catching myself just before I hit the floor.

"That's super useful, actually. How'd you do it?" Aizawa asked.

"Well, I did it on accident actually. Because I had a lot of nightmares for months and even years on end, my quirk kept activating over and over and over again in my sleep and eventually after a few weeks I kind of... adjusted or evolved to be immune to it. Only issue there is that I had to learn to turn it off. I learned how to separate the erasure and floaty aspect first so I wasn't walking around with floaty hair constantly since it wouldn't fucking turn off once I became immune to it. It was a very annoying process but very useful in the end since now I can just hang out in the air and basically have two quirks." I said, yawning softly and tilting myself so I was upright, and turning my quirk off, landing safely on the ground.

"Huh. Well I know what I'll be doing in my free time." Aizawa said, going back to his work after a moment.

"Fair enough." I shrugged and plopped on the couch, before I could even lay down I was asked another question.

"So, can you feel in your prosthetic or is it a thing of you can only feel it if you're looking at it?" Ectoplasm asked.

"I have artificial nerves in this leg and it's been drilled into my bone. I have a metal socket in each of my leg bones that allows the leg to be screwed on from the inside with bolts. The artificial nerves are attached to mine and after a few days of adjustment, I can walk and feel fine. Unfortunately this has led to be being in a lot pain because I kicked a wall corner when I was so used to not being able to feel the leg. This has happened on more than one occasion. This luckily stopped after a few months but like, I had to be super cautious or risk damaging my new leg. It was a nightmare." I said, flexing the robotic leg and moving the toes a bit before moving to lay down, sighing with a gentle, throaty growl of general discontentment.

I was left alone for now after Midnight came over and gave me a pat to the head, and I put my earbuds back in and just stared off for awhile. I couldn't sleep, so I just dissociated and thought of nothing for a few hours until it was lunch. I wasn't really hungry, and I didn't feel like moving, so I didn't even begin getting up once the lunch bell rung. Mic came over and kneeled down in front of me, going to gently shake my shoulder before I focused on him with a hum of question.

"I'm gonna get you some lunch too. I want you to at least have something to eat before dinner. Okay?" He asked me, and I nodded and adjusted how I was laying.

"Just get me a bowl of rice." I muttered, feeling that was all I could stomach at the moment, and he nodded and stood, walking out. I had a feeling I wouldn't be sleeping for a long, long while even with the melatonin, maybe I could ask for something like Ambien, or other sleep drug. That'd be nice.

It's been a week... I haven't slept at all, I've barely managed to actually keep anything down, I've cried out every bit of water I've taken in, and when I'm not dissociated for hours a day, I'm crying, along with humping my pillow and draining my balls basically every day. It was an issue, I know. I look like a vampire. I haven't showered, the only kind of hygiene I've done is wiping myself down with soap and water once and cleaning my dick, as well as a wipe of my armpits with rubbing alcohol every two days, and washing my mouth with hydrogen peroxide. But that took so much energy to do, I flopped right back down and did nothing for hours. I've grown to ignore the hallucinations I got from a lack of sleep too.

I felt like I was dying, honestly. My heart felt weak, my entire body felt weak, and I just felt pathetic. Just breathing was hard. I sent only one update a day to say I was alive to the GC, but nothing more, and today I had spent six hours dissociated after a very long four hours of crying, until Aizawa came in right on time, as he had started doing every night, to bring me something I could manage to keep down. And that was jelly pouches. He had to sneak them to me since everyone else insisted that I eat real food, even though it came right back up just minutes later.

He sat down beside me and offered me a jelly pouch, already opened, and I shakily took it, drinking it down slowly. He was so patient with me, not hesitating for a moment to get me anything I needed. He and the others made sure to keep me hydrated enough, bringing me water a few times a day and making sure I drank all of it. I'd probably be dead without everyone helping to get me to survive through this as I dealt with the emotional turmoil and the despair and agony that ate away at my heart. The one thing I pushed myself to not resort to was not getting up for the bathroom. I actually had to kick myself lightly in the balls on a few occasions to get me up, but I needed the punishment to get my ass up, the rush of adrenaline helping me up.

"You look so beyond exhausted. I think we should get you some sleeping pills, if only to help you pass out for a few nights so you have some energy." He said, offering me another jelly pouch. I took it with my mouth this time and just drank it down, shrugging. He took both pouches and hummed, getting up and walking out. He was only gone for a little bit, coming back in with a hair brush that looked like a wet brush, rubber bands, and a hair tie, as well as a bottle of leave-in. I was confused, allowing him to pull me up so I was sitting crosslegged, and he started to gently brush the knotted hair after spraying it with leave-in, doing it slowly and methodically, and I teared up when I realized he was doing it exactly as Piper did it, like I had said that I missed in one of my especially hard cries at 2 am.

Apparently he had heard it and paid very close attention, because he gathered all of my hair at the back, brushing it from the bottom up until it was completely smooth. The brush felt exactly like the one Piper would brush my hair out with, and flowed smoothly through my barely greasy hair. It still looked and felt fine once brushed out, I could go another few days before I started to stink, so I was fine there, but the sensations it brought to me, how familiar it felt, it was almost like she was doing it herself. The only way I could tell it wasn't her was the difference in hand size as his fingers ran through my hair.

I couldn't help the gentle cries and sobs that came from me, yet more tears flowing from my already red, puffy eyes. I felt him section out my hair so I had two sections on each side of my head, which he started to braid loosely along my scalp, tying each one off, and then french braided the middle, pulling it back into a single braid in the back. It took him awhile and lots of me silently crying because this was my favorite hairstyle for Piper to do for me, it was a kind of viking braid, since it gave me a lot of time with her, and there was lots of her hands in my hair, which I enjoyed so, so much.

Once he finished braiding the top half of my hair, he pulled it back into a half bun, and secured it off with a hair tie, fixing the little tail that stuck up and fluffing it up. The only missing thing was the finishing kiss to the forehead and the soft "I love you" followed by whatever nickname she felt at the moment, and him missing that step nearly threw me into a tantrum, hugging my pillow in my lap as emotions surged through me, unable to tell what I was feeling, but I just cried. I didn't even know what I was crying about, and I didn't for awhile.

I cried for two hours, Aizawa having apologized as he left since he had to get some work done, and to call or text him if I needed anything and couldn't come get him, that was about an hour and a half ago. Finally, I started to feel what I was crying about. It was rage. That rage gave me a huge kick of energy, and I felt the sudden need to tear up a punching bag and get out some excess energy or I was going to hurt or kill someone.

Jumping up, I dried my tears and changed my clothes, feeling my floaty air powers activate on a lower intensity but they vibrated so hard mini bolts of lightning tickled my skin, and I went to Aizawa's dorm, knocking. He opened the door and I shoved passed him, grabbing his knife without a word and racing back out.

"Wait, Shōta, where are you going?!" He called.

"To let off a little steam!" I called back, running off downstairs and directly passed everyone and to one of the combat arenas, I didn't even stop to pull on my boots. It was pretty far away but I kept up a constant pace without tiring, I had no idea what that was about but I was too enraged to think at the moment, swiping my card to get in once I arrived. Starting up some music from my phone into the speakers throughout the city, I chose Free Bird before I started the robots up and got to work on hunting. I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing, but I heard the destruction around me, the tearing of wires, the screeching of metal as I ripped bots apart with my bare hands, hung them with my scarf so their heads tore off their bodies and they crashed to the ground, moving on without a second thought.

I saw nothing but red the whole time, eyes blazing, my floaty aura so irritated and angered that electricity crackled around me, and I slaughtered one bot after another. I was lucky no human got in my way during this rage-fueled energy burst, and I had killed every bot in the arena before the big one came out, myself panting and drooling. I just smirked sadistically and climbed up a building with my floaty assistance, hopping up and growling loudly, licking my lips at the thirst for death.

Shooting forward, I narrowly avoided it slamming its hand into me, and went right for the eyes, stabbing out each individually and twisting before yanking the knife out, and once it was blind, I went for the neck, stabbing repeatedly until I exposed wires, and just started yanking and cutting, riding the massive bot as it was felled with a loud cry of rage combined with joy, what was probably a sick, unhinged smile on my face. I jumped forward at the last second and tumbled to the ground, falling into a backwards roll that I jumped out of after a few rolls, allowing myself the time to flip like a gymnast and land on my feet in a wide stance, heavily panting, knife at the ready, before I assessed that everything around me was dead, just as the Free Bird solo ended.

Placing the knife away, I bowed to the large mech, the energy around me crackling into nonexistence, and stood, scarf and hair settling around me before I turned and walked away, disconnecting my phone from the speakers. I sighed deeply as I walked towards the entrance, seeing that I was being stared at by all of the teachers, all of class 1-A, class 1-B, and class 1-C staring at me. I had forgotten my mask, so I had drool dripping down my chin, which I wiped off and spat out a mouthful, catching my breath with a large sigh as I made my way over.

"So, you feeling better?" Aizawa asked, being the only one with a smirk, and I slapped his knife back against his chest.

"Very much so, thank you. And sorry I stole that, was kind of in a rush." I said, but he grabbed my wrist and made me take the knife back.

"After that, you deserve to keep it. I'll get another." He said, and I paused for a second before actually laughing with a nice smile for the first time since Piper died, taking the knife back.

"Well, that's nice of you. This may have been a turning point, may have been a weird rush of rage, possibly a manic episode from pure exhaustion, we'll see what happens." I said as I started off back to the teacher's dorms with Aizawa following. It was actually Shinsō who caught up with us as I was cracking my neck and knuckles.

"How did you do that? I saw you do things not even he can do!" Shinsō demanded, and I looked back over my shoulder, smirking with a soft chuckle.

"Rage can help you do many things you'd never dream of being able to do. It pulls out these deep, dark abilities and strengths and speeds you've never imagine achievable. On top of all of my training and knowledge I'm a one man army who, when pissed off enough, can take on just about anyone with a thirst for blood I don't normally have. Primal instincts are a powerful thing kid, don't let them take over outside of emergencies okay?" I told him, ruffling his fluffy purple hair. I saw a huge smile form on his face and he actually hugged me, tight around the waist.

I didn't pull away, actually pulling him closer and accepting the affection with open arms. It was appreciated, really.

"Aren't you tired after all of that? You weren't even panting while walking over here and you've barely eaten in the past week. How the hell did you do that?" Mic asked, and I shrugged a bit and let Shinsō let go of me.

"Anyway, I'm craving Swedish pancakes so I'm gonna go make those for myself. I might have to ask one of you to get lingonberries and heavy whipping cream for me though, I dunno if we have those. Unless you're willing to actually let me go somewhere alone or come with me. We probably have everything else though. I'll check." I said, and I had basically every teacher except Aizawa volunteering to get shit for me. I groaned and rolled my eyes, unable to help the fond smile on my face.

"Fine, fine. Rock, Paper, Scissors for it back at the dorms." I said, turning and starting to run off back to the teacher's dorms. I didn't expect the others to keep up with me and I made it back with time to spare, going to pull off my boots before realizing I had done all of that barefoot. It felt nice to run barefoot so I didn't mind at all, and went to the kitchen to check what we had. I pulled out milk, butter, eggs, flour, sugar, and salt, but no whipping cream or lingonberries. I watched the other teachers basically fighting for the chance to do things for me, which I couldn't help but laugh at a bit, and Mic ended up winning, so I sent him out to get the things I needed while I grabbed bowls, a whisk, a pan, a plate, measuring cups and spoons, a spatula, a knife, and preheated the oven to keep my pancakes warm.

Putting on some music on a bluetooth speaker, I threw on some Sin Shake Sin to keep me energized and pulling up my sleeves, washing my hands after removing my rings and placing them in a small pouch I always kept on me. I actually moved to the floor and sat cross legged to make the batter, which I got weird looks for as I was watched from basically all angles. I hand beat the eggs, slowly adding milk, flour, and sugar in increments, then added the butter after melting it on the stove. Once the batter was done, I hopped up and started cooking, regreasing the pan with butter with every pancake, putting them in the oven to keep warm, and Mic came back with two jars of lingonberries and whipping cream.

"Thanks, Mic." I said and poured one and a half jars of the lingonberries into a saucepan, heating the lingonberries on a low heat. I swayed a bit to my music, doing a little happy dance when a good song I really liked came on while doing little tippy taps as I swayed, my metal prosthetic tapping on the floor as I cooked. I made 10 pancakes, before realizing I made a full batch and not a half batch like I should have since... Piper wasn't here. I'll just make some for the teachers then, totally fine, despite getting the sudden urge to just fucking straight up stab myself.

"Huh. Oops." I mumbled, rebuttering the pan to make more.

"What? What is 'oops'?" Mic asked, and I pointed to the bowl of batter with the knife.

"I made too much. I made a full batch instead of a half batch. So I'm making some for you guys to try. You get one each." I said, cracking my neck. I had stopped happy dancing, arms crossing after placing down my knife.

"Oh, that's nice of you, Shōta." Vlad said, and I nodded and kept cooking, changing the music to a more mellow tone of just some piano-centered coffee shop jazz.

"Why'd your happy dancing stop? I was really into those jams, Shō!" Mic asked, hopping up and down a bit. I shrugged and sighed, my energy from earlier fading entirely.

"Just not feeling it right now, Mic. I made a normal batch out of habit and... You know... I'm used to not just cooking for myself." I said, rubbing the back of my neck and tucking my face down into my scarf.

"Ooooh, yeah... Damn..." He calmed down and I kept cooking in silence, until I finished the rest of the pancakes, occasionally stirring the lingonberries, and washing the whisk. Moving to the floor again after turning off both burners and putting in butter with some sugar and milk, I cracked my knuckles and neck, turning the more upbeat music back on to give me the energy to do this, so I turned on Saturday Night's Alright by Elton John and got to work.

I beat the shit out of the butter until it was soft enough to whip and started to whip it with the milk, adding in lingonberries once it started getting thick. And keeping it up until it was a thick, creamy texture of whipped cream crossed with butter. Setting that aside, I got another bowl and poured in some heavy whipping cream and sugar, getting back on the floor after washing the whisk and giving my arm a short break. Back to whipping, I heard Electric Love come on as I kneeled on the floor and softly sang along, having blocked out everything, and once they formed stiff peaks, I got up and licked the whisk to get a taste. Perfect.

Rinsing the whisk and leaving it in the sink, I started to plate everything, using a ziplock bag as a piping bag for the whipped cream. I gave everyone a little smear of butter with some whipped cream and fresh, warm lingonberries and rolled it up on each small plate for a sample for each of the teachers, before I got to work on mine, which I made almost cake like. To fit my very familiar assembly of the way Piper liked to eat her Swedish pancakes, and, fittingly, This Side of Paradise by Coyote Theory came on. I actually sang along softly as I very lovingly stacked each pancake on top of a thin layer of lingonberry butter, warm lingonberries, and whipped cream, kind of as a tribute to her, making it look better than ever despite the tears that threatened to spill.

"This seems like a very complex assembly process. Do you do this regularly?" Aizawa asked.

"No, only for special occasions for breakfast or dinner. She liked them this way, and got me into eating them like this too. We would usually make them together for birthdays, Valentine's Day, Christmas, or our anniversary. Or I'd do it if she had an especially hard week. Speaking of which..." I trailed off and sniffled a bit as I kept working.

"Shit, I totally forgot..." Mic covered his mouth, and I got sad looks.

"Yeah... Today would have been our 6th anniversary together..." I muttered, feeling the tightness in my throat start to hurt as I gulped and shakily sighed.

"Oh my, I am so sorry... Today is going to be especially hard on you, isn't it?" Midnight asked, and I nodded.

"No wonder you got a huge burst of energy. I think your subconscious was expecting celebration." Aizawa said, coming over to rub my back.

"Don't comfort me yet. I don't want to break down and have this get cold." I said, wiping my eyes with a sniff, and I topped the final pancake with extra of everything, including a neat swirl of whipped cream on top. Pouring myself a class of half milk, half whipping cream, which I mixed lingonberry juice left over in the pot in to make lingonberry milk, and grabbing a pair of chopsticks, I took it to the coffee table in the living room where there was better lighting and got a really good picture of it, proud of my work.

"This is probably the best I've ever made, she'd be proud." I said, tears coming back to my eyes as I bowed my head, touching the table with my forehead, partially to hide the tears and partially in respect for a moment of silence for her despite wanting to break down in tears. I didn't even want to eat it anymore since it reminded me so much of her, but I did anyway, eating the top layer by rolling it up around the toppings and snipping it in half with my chopsticks like scissors, and I hesitated to take the first bite, having to emotionally prepare for it this time, and finally ate the first half, but just to make it worse, I Wanna Be Yours, our fucking wedding song came on, and I couldn't hold back the tears. I wasn't sobbing, and I avoided getting any on my food, but silent tears rolled down my cheeks as I ate, determined to finish it now.

And I fucking did, I ate every last bite of it, and drank every last drop of cream I had, despite silently crying the entire time. I wasn't disturbed by anyone, in fact they had left to give me some peace, and once I finished, I set my chopsticks down horizontally, bowed deeply with my head to the table, and let a few tears lose.

"Thank you, my love... for the years of love and happiness, for healing my soul, and for teaching me to make the best goddamn food I've ever eaten in my life..." I whispered, gulping and sighing shakily and staying down for a few moments in just silence, raising my head and picking up my plate and glass and taking them to the kitchen, washing everything I used as 'I Wanna Be Yours' played on loop, tears just constantly poured down my face, and I dried everything myself and put it away, turning off the music and going to sit on the couch with my legs crossed one over the other like she used to, and I heard the others walk back in just as I was replacing my rings on their respective fingers.

"I hope it was good at least." Mic said first as he sat next to me.

"It was almost too perfect... it was like she made it herself..." I muttered, hunched over with my eyes pressed to my hands. My entire body just... hurt. Hurt with emotional pain.

"Well, I'm glad it at least tasted good and you seemed happy while making it. Your little happy dance was cute." Midnight said, and I softly hummed a bit.

"Thanks... Piper would say the same thing..." I pouted, actually pouting my lower lip out like a child. It was how I got attention from Piper and showed her I was upset.

"Hm, I have an idea, what kind of nicknames did she call you?" Ectoplasm asked, a hand gently placed on my shoulder.

"A bunch of different kinds... We had the common Shōta, Shōkun, since she was a month older than me, Shōchan, and Shōtan, honey, sweetheart, normal stuff like that, but she liked to call me after things I reminded her of... teddy bear was one of my favorites... there were some... mildly embarrassing ones in there too that were never used in front of anyone else of course... Well, she mainly just went with a safe given name with no honorific or shortening in front of people... I think it was mainly to save my dignity..." I said, letting out a little half-assed chuckle there at the end.

"I promise we won't make fun of you for any of them of you want to share. I've been called some ridiculous things by partners and called them pretty stupid things." Mic said, and Midnight sat on the other side of me.

"Me too. Don't worry about it. I also end up calling my partners ridiculous names and being called pretty... unconventional things." She said, and I couldn't help the little smile that came to my face as I silently thought.

"Oh, alright... My real favorite was 'kitty', for what I think are obvious reasons..." I mumbled, my face heating up as I ducked my head.

"Oh come on, that is nothing. You remember that one girl I dated when I was like 20 who called me embarrassing shit in public?" Mic asked, and I snorted a bit, covering my face.

"Yes. Honey, that was embarrassing for her, I just felt bad for you." I said, letting the queer language slip on accident.

"Wait, Shōta, you just called me honey in a very flamboyant manner. Are you..." Mic asked, doing the gay hand thing, and I couldn't help the massive shit eating grin that appeared on my face, the unnaturally wide one without showing my dimples.

"You are! Oh my god, you fucking are. So, what are you~?" Mic asked, chin in his hands as he smirked at me.

"I am a lot of things. Be prepared for the fucking list I have cultivated over the course of probably four months. I'm gonna go through the three things, sexuality, romantic attraction, and gender. It is... ah. Okay, to start off, I'm demisexual, quite obvious as I've never really showed interest in anyone, thought I was aro/ace for awhile but that changed, I'm pansexual, pan meaning all genders, do not make the joke, any of you, androsexual, in the sense I like masculine traits like deeper voices, taller, more muscular frames, etc, androgenyosexual, meaning I also like more androgynous presentation in people.

Onto romantic, I'm pan and demi-romantic, which should also be kind of obvious considering previous reasons of never having shown interest in anyone, pretty short and sweet. And for gender, I struggled on finding a label for awhile, I never put a huge importance on how I was perceived. I didn't care about seeming masculine, I just wanted to be comfortable with how I looked. I didn't care about acting masculine either. I do happen to be quite curvy now that I've built up a lot of muscle and have some chunk to my body, which I was actually bullied for growing up, and I finally found a label that suited me after like two months.

Gender apathetic. I don't give two fucks about how I'm perceived. Sometimes I just feel like the word swamp. I'm gonna dress how I want and act how I want and I don't care what anyone thinks. I like the way I look, the long hair suits me better, in my opinion and I really like it, and I like wearing baggy clothes with lots of coverage because they're warm and comfortable, and I'm gonna wear pink because I like the color, no other reason than that. I'll wear leggings and yoga pants around the house and to workout no problem, and if anyone else has an issue with it, sounds like a you problem. I'm glad we don't really have gendered pronouns in the Japanese language, makes this a lot easier than people fumbling over what to call me." I finished, having relaxed a lot more.

"Damn, triple whammy. Glad you're not straight or cis though, I probably would have had to disown you as my best friend if you were one of the straights." Mic said, and I chuckled softly.

"You know, oddly enough, Piper had every single one of the same labels. I actually found out a lot about myself through her. I actually came to love myself a lot easier because she was really similar to me. Like the fact that she and I are both autistic. I was never diagnosed because my sperm donor was a piece of shit but, yeah, I got an official diagnosis once the trauma was no longer affecting my behavior as much since it actually just exaggerated the autism a lot. It is so obvious I am not neurotypical, though. I don't know why no one ever said anything. I just got called quirky and different and unsettling my entire life. I was also bullied for being weird growing up too." I said, playing with the hair that was down, pulling it over my shoulder and running my fingers through it.

"Yeah, you were not normal at any point in time." Midnight chuckled.

"Well, that explains... way too much." Aizawa said, blinking a few times as he stared at the carpet before looking up with a soft "huh".

"Yep. Basically every aspect of my behavior and the way I experience the world is influenced by it. I'll talk to you about it later to give you a better idea of what I mean." I said, hugging my stomach as I sunk down into the couch.

"Anyway, back to nicknames. What else did she call you? I'm really interested in knowing more about your relationship because that was a first." Mic said, and I hummed in understanding.

"She kind of would affectionately refer to me like you would an animal sometimes, I'm not gonna lie. I thought it was cute though, like Bub was a very common one, bubs and bubby too, the normal western babe and baby as well, as well as stuff like my love, my light, my life, so most of it was pretty standard western culture nicknames with some more cute stuff thrown in there, as well as some really affectionate ones from various European languages and some from Japanese. One of my personal favorites was Teddy Bear because I am quite furry now that I don't shave anything at all, and I am apparently very soft and pleasant to cuddle.

She would also call me nicknames in English based off my name kanji, like she would sometimes call me Swamp, Swampy, or Eraser on the days I'm feeling especially cryptic and mysterious because I do that sometimes. The most special one was being referred to as "my Flame", that was one of my personal favorites since we kind of thought of ourselves as twin flames with how similar we were and we felt a sense of déjà vu a lot even really early on, so we just went with it." I said, earning aw's from nearly everyone.

"That is so cute! What was she like? And what did she look like?" All Might asked, and I sighed softly and intertwined my fingers with my forefingers together, resting against my forehead.

"Literally the most beautiful, breathtaking, heart-stopping, sexy person I have ever laid my own two, eh, one eye on. Even though she did look like the physical embodiment of the words 'sleep deprived' and 'insomnia'. They were kind, caring, patient, incredibly rational and hard-working, introverted to an almost worrying degree, almost doting in a way even though she didn't much care for children, as shown by her getting her tubes removed as soon as possible, them shits was gone, years before she even met me. Which was cool with me since I had a vasectomy at like 22, since I never wanted kids, ever. Anyway, she was kind of emotionless and apathetic and cold-seeming around other people, especially those she didn't enjoy the company of, but around people she liked, especially me, she was quite warm and open and enjoyed being around other people for a short period of time, until her social battery ran out.

She and I were both night owls to an almost worrying degree and would go to bed in the morning. She worked 3-5 days a week, depending on her hours, and would often work night shifts or up to 36 hours on any normal day, by choice actually, and if she did a 36 hour shift she got the rest of the week off since work weeks in most of Europe are 40 hours at max but on average around 35. She was a veterinary surgeon and far smarter than I will ever be, with 4 years of college and 5 of university and specializing with a P. hD with a double major under her belt. Like ma'am, I bow down to that level of perseverance to pursue your dream you've had since you were a child. I hated school, I could never. Then again I probably just hated everything bellow college-level since she told me all of her professors were super chill compared to her high school teachers and that I had college professor vibes since one of her professors actually pulled up to school in a whole sleeping bag before, which had me fucking crying since she had photo evidence.

She did 9 years of higher education on top of 6 martial arts and a gap year of work to gain experience. Like, bitch, I could never but I applaud you. I could go on gushing for hours about this woman, I don't think you want me to do that and I'm..." I trailed off to yawn into my scarf. "Actually starting to get tired. I might be able to sleep finally." I said, sniffling with a groan.

"How long has it been since you've slept properly?" Aizawa asked. I blanked as I stared at my phone, having been pulling up photos of Piper from the thousands that I had.

"Um. Not since... I woke up from the alcohol-induced coma. Unless you count the nightmare filled dozing at the ramen place." I said, having to think about that for a minute.

"Wha- How are you standing and awake at all right now?" He asked, and I shrugged.

"I have no idea. Powered by spite and sheer will at this point." I said, projecting a picture of Piper with my phone. She and I had been out on a trail ride at the time, herself not knowing I was taking a picture of her as she looked off into the distance. Her hair glowed in the sun, her skin beautiful as always despite the eye bags, wearing a simple Eraser Head hoodie, jeans, and boots.

"Oh wow, she is really pretty. Except for those eye bags." Mic said, and I nodded, giving him a look, and flipped to another picture of her cuddled to my bare chest, full on asleep, eye bags clearly visible as I stroked her cheek with the delicacy of someone stroking an old cat.

"This was after a 40 hour long stretch of the only sleep being a two and half hour nap halfway through since there had been a bunch of neglected and abused animals brought in the day before. This is what I liked to call her recharge mode since she was dead by then. No battery to do anything. Even then she would wake up six hours later because she hasn't eaten in 24 hours so I made sure to carb and protein load her so she could sleep more for as long as possible." I said, smiling softly at the picture.

"She looks tiny next to you. How tall was she? 160 cms?" Mic asked, and I wheezed and shook my head, giving a side-by-side of us at our wedding.

"175. 80 kilos of pure muscley chonk who had a kick strong enough to break bones. I have seen that woman actually punch someone's lights out before in one hit. They had an almost taser-like reaction of going stiff as their head was jerked to the side before they just collapsed. It was kinda hot I'm not even gonna lie. Also, watching her spar with people during martial arts training... mmmm. I just have massive hands and can palm a basketball." I made a soft happy growl as I swiped to a picture of her with someone in a bow and arrow choke.

"Her style of martial arts with those who don't know her is to lure people in by faking weakness and then absolutely destroying them." I said, showing a video of her faking a fall and letting her opponent get on top of her, before she got them into a spider guard, dropped them down, did a scissor sweep, and had her arm over their neck and them tapping out in less than five seconds.

"Ooh, so you like strong, confident women, don't you Shōta~?" Midnight asked, and I nodded.

"Yes. Very much so. I also like long hair on other people because she lets me brush it and style it and play with it. And her hair thick as fuck, kinda like mine, and it got even thicker after she met me because her stress levels went down even more once we both started improving mentally. She literally had so much goddamn hair to the point that it was hard to get a brush through it and she regularly broke hairbands and hair brushes. She could barely get a hairband around it three times, if she tried for four it snapped, even if it was one of those stretchy ones with the black fabric around it. Conditioner and hairbands were in constant need of resupplying in our house." I said, showing a video of her galloping full speed, bareback and brideless with me, thick hair flying behind her like a blazing fire, gold flecks in her tips.

"Oh wow, that is thick. It almost looks like fire when flying behind her like that." Vlad said, and Aizawa was staring with a suspiciously soft look.

"Mhmm. We go through a lot of conditioner and leave-in. And the hair brushes must be replaced at least once every six months because they fucking break." I said, chuckling at a photo of me, taken right after a hair brush had snapped in my hair, the look on my face one of pure annoyance, arms still raised over my head, holding my hair to brush it.

"Your fucking face-" Mic laughed, and I chuckled softly and found a picture of me from the back, shirtless, hair up on a bun, stretching out so I was flexed, jawline visible since my head was slightly turned to the side, wearing my black hakama, kyahan, tabi, and jikatabi, since I liked to work out in them since they breathed well and allowed me to move well.

"Whoop, I found one of me shirtless in our shared cloud. Have a nosebleed, why don't you?" I asked and pulled it up, and immediately Mic, Vlad, Midnight, and to my surprise, All Might, looked flustered.

"Dude, Shō, you are sexy as hell, what happened?" Mic asked, and I shrugged with a small smile.

"Changed diet, better mental health, working out in more strength based areas, the likes. I also really have gotten into wearing hakama, kyahan, tabi, and jikatabi when working out since it's good for leg compression while still being breathable, and the tabi and jikatabi are great for flexibility. Also, Aizawa, invest in tabi and jikatabi, I promise you it is so much better than running around in clunky ass boots. You'll be far quieter, faster, and your feet won't hurt after wearing them for hours on end. If you look closely, I have a tattoo for each of you fucks down my back, including Sushi and Shirakumo. I have the rooftop squad in a triangle between my shoulder blades. I have one for each student plus Shinsō and Eri, who is my adopted daughter that we rescued from a mafia boss and I kind of was initially forced to be her guardian because she couldn't control her quirk and I quickly became her favorite UA staff member, on my limbs, and one for each of the cats and one for Piper on my chest. I am inked to the fuckin' teeth at this point." I said, rolling up my sleeves and pant leg for them.

"What about your other leg? It sounded hard." Mic asked, and I chuckled and put my fake leg up, pulling up my pant leg to show my fake leg, flexing the robotic toes a few times.

"Woah, how'd you lose it again?" Vlad asked, coming closer to inspect it.

"Protecting my students from the Meta Liberation Army, which is basically a band of people who believe quirk users should be able to use their quirks whenever and wherever. Now, I kind of half agree. I feel like it should be more like driving a car, with licenses and age minimums and some quirk-focused classes in schooling to ensure responsible quirk usage, but I don't think it should only be heroes allowed to use their quirks whenever, wherever. With untrained people, they probably won't be able to do anything impressive, and as long as they're stable, I doubt people would do anything too stupid. If it backfires, fine, we can figure out another solution, but we evolved to have quirks, why not be able to use them in useful ways?" I asked, putting my fake foot down as I pulled my clothes back down my limbs.

"I mean, that is a good point, but what if a bunch of people decide to try to overthrow the government?" Vlad asked.

"I- What? Okay, hold on. How did you get from point A to point W? If they're trying to overthrow the government there is one of two reasons. They're extremists who need to be tried for treason or there is a legitimate systemic issue, and if it happens on either side, there will be loads of protesting, strikes, media attention, possible riots, etc. that will happen beforehand and give the government loads of time, because it's a very slow, gradual process, to fix whatever it is or risk getting attacked because they don't listen to the people they're governing, and at that point that is their fault. My wife had personal experience with this and told me everything so I know what I'm talking about here." I said, having perked up more from the possibility of a debate. I actually liked talking politics now, being highly educated since I had taken political science courses and studied different political ideologies and had counts of Piper's past.

"It would be total anarchy, if we let people use their quirks without training!" Vlad said, and I arrowed my eyes a bit in confusion.

"Did you not hear a word I said? They can get licenses after passing a government mandated test with hours of training so they can get a basic understanding of what their quirk is and how it works." I said, head tilting as I stared at him.

"That might work, but what if they want more freedom and take it to a dangerous level?" All Might asked, and I stood up straighter.

"Well, in my opinion, as long as no one encroaches on other people's rights, they can do whatever they want. It's like the same as free speech, you can say whatever you want but if you encroach on someone else's rights to exist or spout hate speech or something, there will be social consequences, and even legal consequences if there are things like death threats and harassment being said. As long as you don't effect other people's or minorities' lives negatively without consent, I don't care what you do or say, for the most part.

Now, where I do care is if you hold hateful views of an oppressed group. Like, just for example, homophobic, transphobic, or sexist views, especially if they are influenced by religion or someone's experience with an individual or a small group of people from that oppressed group. Or making jokes about harm coming to members of those group for the sole reason of why they are oppressed in the first place, like rape jokes for instance, that's kind of where I draw the line." I said, having leaned forward in my seat and pulled my legs up to cross them in the weird way I learned from Piper to focus more.

"Huh, never thought I'd be discussing stuff like this with you, Shōta. You're a lot more interesting than you let on." Thirteen said, and I tilted my head a bit and smirked.

"Well, when you live with, fall in love with, and marry a strong leftist that tends to happen. Your mindset gradually changes. Now, I just shifted more left then I already was, so it's not like I switched sides of the political spectrum. I just went from left to far left." I shrugged, and Mic seemed to suddenly become interested.

"So, what's your political ideology?" He asked, and I had to think about that for a moment.

"I'm somewhere between socialist, communist, Leninist, Marxist, Trotskyist, and anarchist, honestly. Just depends on what I've learned that day and I love aspects from all of them and just can't decide. Done well, I'd be happy living under any of those. I loathe capitalism, I won't get into why unless you want me to start going on loud tangents recounting events of the past of my wife's life and even before then and when I learned how disgusting, foul, repulsive, and vile capitalism is. So, unless you want me to start yelling and getting very angry at a political and economic ideology and a select few rich assholes, I recommend you don't ask. The rage of myself and my wife combined would probably give me the power to actually kill someone brutally again." I said, fist clenching around my scarf.

"Possessed by the rage of your dead wife and adopting the ideals of her over the years, that is powerful love right there." Midnight said, and I scoffed a bit and smirked as I rolled my eyes.

"And I'm not ashamed of it either. She was the love of my goddamn life and no one can replace her. And yes, I am that guy who says 'my wife' as much as physically possible because of how much I love her." I said, completely unashamed of my love for her.

"Awww, I love that for you. You deserve love like that after everything you've been through." Mic said, rubbing my shoulder gently as I sighed deeply and felt the sadness creeping back in, slowly.

"I just... I just wish I were home... I miss our two cats too, Eraser and Yūta, and Soba, our snake, and our two horses... Levi was her's, mine was Suwabe, named after my seiyuu... I miss my life. It was peaceful, tranquil, felt like I was in heaven once through all of the emotional healing and was finally able to do what I wanted without being hindered by myself... I miss flying to America a few times a year to visit her friends and family... We'd go to a convention called SacAnime to visit friends she met there at 17, and Reno, Nevada to visit another friend of hers that could actually speak fluent Japanese. Fuck, I have to let them know she's gone... Oh, this is going to be tough... Especially on Jax... They were like siblings." I muttered, rubbing my face with a soft groan as I rubbed my face.

"Damn... We'll be here for you, Shōkun." Mic said, rubbing my shoulder.

"Don't call me that, please... That was a nickname Piper had for me. Plus I'm 12 years older than you now." I grumbled into my hands.

"Oops, sorry, Shōta. Anyway, we'll be here for you anytime you need." He continued, hand never leaving my shoulder.

"Thanks. Can I describe something kind on behalf of Piper? It was when this switch flipped in her before she was murdered, right after Yūta, our half blind cat with a back right prosthetic like me, was killed. It is... quite graphic." I asked, scratching at the carpet with my bare toes.

"Sure, whatever you need. Luckily us heroes are good with gore." Midnight said, gently pulling me into her.

"Alright, if I start crying a little, don't say anything." I said, letting out a dry little chuckle, huffing a bit as I got quiet agreements.

"Okay... It was October 7th, 2 days before her birthday and 17 before our anniversary... 27 days ago at about 01:00. We were around the only coffee shop that was open nearby... I had just gone in for five minutes to get a coffee and she was just outside with the cats because we'd take them on walks, don't say anything, they were huge Maine Coons and were harness trained and needed to be walked to get energy out.

So, I came out of the coffee shop to find her gone, and I smelled blood. It was faint, but when I followed it, I saw my worst nightmare that I never could have predicted... Piper usually knows how to defend herself and can easily take someone twice her size down... But she was held at knifepoint, against her neck, and forced to watch and listen as our two cats, Eraser and Yūta... slowly has their neck snapped by twisting them... Yūta's screeches as he was slowly murdered still ring through my head sometimes...

I saw the moment her thread of patience snapped, going from shaking and in shock, to getting the focus, commitment, and sheer fucking will I saw appear in her eyes as she went still. All I heard was 'you're dead' in this deep voice she could do, deeper than mine, from years of training her vocal cords, before she bit the knifeman so hard she ripped a chunk of his arm out. She held onto it as she grabbed the knife from him and kicked the gunman, the one who had murdered our cats, unconscious.

There was not a hint of remorse as she stabbed this man in the legs and worked her way up, the finishing blow right to his right eye, straight through his head, and she twisted it 180° degrees before pulling it out. It felt so much longer than it was, he barely had time to make a sound after being bitten, and wasn't given a chance to recover from the initial shock, it barely lasted 5 seconds before he dropped, bleeding profusely, already dead. Piper spat out the chunk of arm meat still in her mouth and was about to turn towards me when the sound I keep hearing whenever I try to sleep rang out. The very gunshot that murdered the love of my life and the savior of my soul...

The gunman, who was later identified as a man named Ivar Andersson, the very man who had been harassing Piper for years, even after we got married... I have a hunch he was trying to get back at me for, as he put it, 'stealing his girl'... First of all, addressing a grown ass woman with eye bags, a toned, developed body, and more years of schooling than anyone I have ever met and the job of a surgeon as a mere girl is shameful. Second of all, he was a creepy bastard akin to what I'd see trying to rape someone on patrol during my hero days..." I had to stop sigh shakily and gulp down a sob, trying not to cry again as Mic and Midnight both did their best to comfort me.

"I'm so sorry, Shō... At least I know why you can't sleep, being startled awake by the sound of gunshots and the screams of your dying cat... Oh my goodness..." Mic muttered, hugging me lightly to his side.

"Yeah... It's kind of hell being forced to stay awake. Everything hurts, I've had a headache for days now, my anxiety and depression and insomnia are the worst they've been, and don't even get me started on the hallucinations. I hear little bits of nightmares I know I've had in the past... Whether it's a student screaming for help, or a shadow of that fucking Nōmu, or the laugh of Shigaraki somewhere in my brain... I even get phantom pain from previous injuries, my nervous system is so confused as to what's real and what isn't at this point... There's more of my story, if you want me to tell it..." I muttered, body shaking just lightly.

"Only if you can handle it." Midnight muttered, so I nodded and cleared my throat a bit.

"Okay... After the gunshot sounded I kind of went deaf... I heard nothing but a slight, muffled ringing, and my vision very quickly turned pure blood red. I don't remember the actual blind rage fit but when I zoned back in, Ivar had been brutally mutilated by me. I hadn't even thought about what I was doing for a second, and I had apparently held him down with my scarf and, using the very same knife from earlier, carved those words from the article into him, and I had broken both of his arms before repeatedly slamming his face into the brick wall until his brain was exposed, and I stomped on his neck until only tendons held it, since his spine was snapped almost exactly halfway down and completely disconnected, he was already beyond dead so I'm not exactly sure why I kept going, but I was actually kind of horrified once I regained consciousness...

Then it basically went how I told you all at dinner a week ago... I went home after being seen, saw the news, bought some whiskey, and drank myself to death in what was essentially three hours or less after writing that suicide note, and then I ended up here after I was buried, and you know the rest..." I said, sighing deeply as I nuzzled into my scarf, tears forming in my eyes as I shakily sighed, silently whimpering to myself and feeling my pockets for my earbuds, not finding them.

"What? What do you need, Shō?" Mic asked, and I felt someone holding my hand, I wasn't paying attention to who it was but the hand felt large and bony so I'm guessing All Might. I tried to find the ability to speak, but nothing was coming out so I covered my ears before tucking my head beneath my knees. I was probably having the quietest, calmest autistic meltdown ever, since everything felt so loud and painful and nothing was even happening, it was quiet, but god was the silence deafening.

I didn't even notice Aizawa had left until I felt the comfortingly crushing weight of a weighted blanket press against my back, being forcefully uncurled before I was tightly wrapped in the weighted blanket with a pillow cuddled to my chest, my earbuds and phone being presented to me by Aizawa as I just kind of sat there for a second, not understanding exactly what had just happened, before taking both and pulling them into my cocoon of sorts, and I pretty quickly got Sin Shake Sin pounding in my ears, and I felt my braids being undone carefully as I let my body relax, pulling the weighted blankets tighter with my face buried into the pillow hugged to my chest.

Aizawa's POV

That was probably the quietest, calmest meltdown I have ever seen, but I knew the signs. Going nonverbal and getting that look of 'it's too damn loud and I'm being touched too much and I'm processing too much to handle right now' that just makes anyone look tortured and overwhelmed. I had ran to get his blankets, his clean pillow, since he had told me about the humping issue that helped get spare energy out when he couldn't really move and helped relieve some sexual frustration, which I understood and figured he'd be able to get out of that himself, and I got his earbuds and phone for him. I could hear the bass pounding in his ears from the music he started blasting, I didn't exactly expect mostly industrial, hard-sounding rock, but the bass probably feels nice.

I started to unbraid his hair so I could give him head scratches, just like he showed me how Piper did it, since it would hopefully get him to talk, carefully combing it through with my fingers. He seemed to soothe much more until he almost seemed asleep as I buried my fingers in his hair once it was completely combed out and I had my hand positioned just right, hitting the spots Piper used to hit every time she scratched his head, so I pulled my hand away and came around to the front of the couch, pulling a bottle of Ambien and a bottle of galantimine out of my pocket that I had gotten for him, disguised as for myself. I did have incredibly bad insomnia, but he hadn't slept in a week, so I figured he needed it more than me. I also pulled the bluetooth eye mask he had told me about, two of them, fully charged, and the charger, so he can swap them out for as long as he wants to lay in bed and/or sleep.

He looked up and stopped to process the labels on the bottles, reaching out and taking them gently, grunting a bit as he placed them in his lap, tucking his face in his scarf to gently sniffle softly as he rubbed his eyes a bit.

"Thanks. I might not even need the Ambien tonight..." He muttered, chuckling just a bit with an empty sigh, stroking softly over the label of the galantimine. I think he already knew what it did, so I wonder what he'll decide to do with its effects?

"Well, whether you do or don't, just don't do anything stupid." I said, and he nodded and carefully stood, starting to trudge back up the stairs to his dorm without another word, looking exhausted and ready to collapse.

Shōta's POV

I willed myself to stay awake through the washing of my pillow after removing my rings and having them be safely placed inside my pillow case, hanging it in front of the window on the curtain rod with some clips, a towel beneath it to catch any spare drips, before I hummed and went to the bathroom. I had an idea, so, since I hadn't eaten much solid food recently, I wouldn't risk any accidents. Turning on the shower and stripping down, stepping in and feeling the steaming hot water against my skin, letting the water pound against my neck and back on the massage setting.

"Piper, my love... my light... my Flame... I miss you more than anything..." I whispered to myself, missing the feeling of her touch, the sound of her voice, the look of her entire goddess-like being, I missed the immense amounts of pleasure she gave me every time we got intimate, and the way she comforted me when I was upset, I missed her cuddles and kisses and the loving looks she'd give me, and her hands in my hair... I just want to go home...

I started to silently cry again, and I recalled Piper's past, in America, the constant suffering she heard about every day, the pandemic she lived through with people dying of COVID left and right, being forced to go to school with the huge risk of getting infected and killing loved ones, the pollution, the horrible dirtying of the world to a length I had never heard of. That horrid barking cough Piper had been left with from the pollution in the air as she grew up and her vocal cord dysfunction and acid reflux, not even counting the amount of abuse and death and torture to people and animals around the world, as if they weren't even living beings, and the period in Piper's life where she was just abused and neglected by Brett and her mother. The amount of trauma that woman suffered, the constant existential dread, it hurt me to know she had been through all that. I had nothing of the sort until I was an adult, and even then, it wasn't even that bad or for that long.

Thinking of all of this, I cried for her again as I did sometimes, this one quiet as I sat in the bathtub, curled up as I quietly sobbed to myself, tears and snot pouring from my face as my sobs gradually turned into wails of agony, and I wanted nothing more than to drop dead so I can either be with my love or not exist at all, not knowing the pain of her being dead, so I didn't have to suffer anymore, or be reborn so I can meet her all over again, hopefully both of us in a world where we can be together from the beginning and exist peacefully in a world not full of death and hatred and bigotry.

I let the water just run over me, washing my face off as I cried, and the tears just seemed to never stop, even though I was crying so hard I felt nauseated, so I quickly turned off the shower, lined the floor with towels and wrapped one around myself sitting on the floor, slumped against the cool cabinet below the sink, and I very quickly bawled myself into puking up mostly acid, turns out I chewed through the pancakes really quickly so not much of them came up, but still was producing a lot of acid so I spat up a lot, panting between wretches until I was dry heaving, and the last few coughs escaped me before I stood up shakily and closed the toilet lid, flushing it and wiping my face off gently.

I turned the water back on and got back in the shower, washing my face off and actually getting to conditioning my hair and washing my body and face, but I still wept softly as I went through my conditioning and washing, making sure to get my ass really good with a bit of hand soap, before I got out and started to dry myself off once I finished crying completely, and was just left with little sniffles and sighs. Drying off completely before getting to my hair, drying it as best I could while brushing it through, spraying it out with leave-in and brushing it through, parting it and brushing it out into an arch so it flowed down my back and shoulders, before getting my toothbrush and wetting it, squeezing a bit of toothpaste on and starting to brush my teeth in the pattern I had picked up from Piper. Ten seconds on each side of the front of the teeth, eight on each section of the mouth, and then get way in the back for three, and one last sweep before spitting without rinsing to let the fluoride work.

I got my nail file and filed down my nails, clipping off any nail tags I had created from picking or biting, before I filed down everything. Sighing, I got the bottle of facial moisturizer and gently rubbed it into my face, eyes closed so I could kind of imagine Piper doing it for me, in an attempt to comfort me and grasp onto what memories I had of her. Sitting on the ground, I got both the bottle of teakwood lotion and shea butter, starting to moisturize my entire body, starting with the lotion. After doing my back first, I laid on the towels on the ground and lovingly stroked along my body, gently stroking my knuckles along my nipples and moving down to my legs, lifting both up to do my ass, even getting between my cheeks since it had been awhile.

Placing both feet on the floor, I did my thighs, keeping my breathing slow, deep, and even as I stroked the lotion into my skin, and then into my only foot, which I took some extra care to massage gently, before finishing on my groin, gently stroking over my soft cock, gently cupping my balls and very, very gently massaging, pressing lightly against my perineum to see if I could actually have an actual healthy, slow, self-loving masturbation session rather than just desperately humping at a pillow while sobbing to myself because of how badly I needed her love.

I was definitely feeling pleasure in it, and it took awhile but I started to crave more, so I got the bottle of shea butter and started to work it into my skin, starting at the neck and moving down, finally finishing off on my groin before I got onto my hands and knees, taking the bottle of lotion and a damp rag as well as a dry rag with me as I crawled off to my shikibuton, laying on my back with my legs spread. My room was warm at the moment, so I could do this without blankets.

Getting my hands slathered in lotion, I started to softly stroke my still soft cock, reminding myself that I took awhile to get hard and that I had time, all the time in the world really, and I was very gentle with my abused dick, which I had really not been gentle on, so I treated it with care, instead of hurrying. Slowly, I got myself hard before moving into a loose, relaxed child's pose with my legs spread, wishing so badly that I had a prostate massager, but I made do with slipping my thumb inside my ass carefully, finding my prostate with a soft gasp, taking my hand off my hardened cock to stroke my thighs, panting a bit. Softly stroking my prostate, I softly moaned away as my cock just hung below me, slowly starting to drip.

I forgot I did in fact have neighbors, my pleasured moaning having gotten quite loud. Luckily my face was buried into my pillow so it hopefully couldn't be heard by anyone, and soon I had flopped down onto my side, panting with my face flushed, as I cuddled my kakebuton and pillow, pressing my cheek to my pillow as I pulled my thumb gently out of my ass, getting more lotion on my fingers and spreading my legs, spreading my ass cheeks with my free hand as I slipped my middle and ring fingers carefully into my ass. Shakily whimpering, I thrusted them in and out quicker as I felt the gradual tightening in my abs, my toes curling as my panting got harder, despite my best efforts to keep it even and measured.

I moved to my back when my arm started to fall asleep, stroking my thighs with just my fingertips as my prostate almost throbbed inside me, but I had to stop just for a moment to switch hands. I could feel the pre-cum leaking down my abdomen, my rock hard cock occasionally spurting a bit in a sort of mini-orgasm as I was held on edge. Stroking up my abdomen to my chest, I played with my nipples gently, twitching lightly at the shocks of pleasure I got, not registering a single thing from the outside world right now.

Pleasured coursed through my very veins, nestling comfortably deep in my bones, it felt so familiar and comforting, and I saw lots of memories of Piper, kneeling over me, showing me a pleasure I had never known before I met her. Her beautiful smile, her gorgeous body, that look in her eyes that she got when I felt good, and the immense pleasure she gave me, more than I could ever imagine... I forgot she was gone for a bit, as all I saw or heard or felt was her. To me, the outside world didn't exist for now... Only my little world inside my mind, that was all that mattered to me now.

Soft cries and moans of pleasure left my throat, my abs and asshole getting tighter as heat and pleasure coursed through my body, but especially my legs and cock and I felt my bladder felt full, but I paid no mind to the familiar feeling, instead focusing on the pleasure as my body shook lightly, toes curled and desperately wanting to cum but being held on the edge for a time I didn't even know. I felt a sudden, rapid expansion and intensifying of the pleasure surging through me, and the relief that hit me as my back arched, the pressure in my body finally releasing as my hips bucked, eyes rolling as they quickly shut to avoid the massive spray of cum that hit me directly in the face, as usual, and covered my chest and stomach in six different throbs, before it started to die down with the familiar trembles that ran through me, and I gave a final shudder, my need to pee gone as I pulled my fingers slowly from my hole.

I let myself bask in the warmth and soft tingles still flowing through me for a while before I reached for the damp cloth and wiped my fingers clean of any lotion. Then, I got to the cum splattered all around my face and body, starting with my face, getting little bits and sucking my fingers clean after each swipe. Once I was cleaned off, I wiped myself down with the damp rag and then dried myself with the dry rag. Getting up to my hands and knees shakily, I crawled to the bathroom with both towels and the bottle of lotion, putting them away before making my way back to my bed, laying down carefully, curling up, taking a pill for both ambien and galantimine, pulling on my bluetooth eye mask and all of my rings, turning on a sleep aid, and getting right to sleep without struggle.