Camelot Drabble Prompt bingo 512: shower together
Merlin bingo M2115: A4: canon compliant
Author's notes: From Arthur's Bane part 2.
Disclaimer: I do not own the BBC version of Merlin; They and Shine do. I am very respectfully borrowing them with no intent to profit. No money has changed hands. No copyright infringement is intended.
It was a bad idea, a very bad idea. All right, so there was no other way into the fortress to rescue Morgana and Gwen but still, Merlin didn't have to like it. He didn't like it. At all.
As Arthur explained it, they would both be slithering up the waste shaft, one that had rotten food and shit coating the walls. The bandits would never see them coming, Arthur said. That Merlin was so used to shovelling horse dung that it would be just like every other day, he said.
That they would be hailed as heroes, he said.
The lying wanker.
Never mind that it was Merlin leading the way up the stinking shaft, the smell of shit and piss and rotting food almost overwhelming and Arthur behind him, sheltered from any refuse or other things falling down into the pit below.
Showering together, Arthur had called it, snickering a little, then told Merlin to ignore the constant fall of slimy whatevers on Merlin's head, told him to stop moaning about it and to just keep going up the shaft.
That was just about the stupidest thing the pillock had ever said. And when Merlin got back to Camelot, he would have to see how much showering he could arrange for Arthur. Maybe a few horses pissing into his boots or a bit of rat stew slopping onto the git's head. Or rotten vegetables that just happened to be falling out of an upstairs window. Maybe a chamber pot's contents flying into the air as Merlin fake-tripped and emptied it right into Arthur's smug face.
Merlin swore that if they ever got out of this alive, he was going to collect the dirtiest, smelliest refuse imaginable and dump it onto his fat royal head. It would serve him right.
Showering together, indeed.