Hey y'all! This authors note is gonna be short and sweet but i wanted to explain why i'm posting this and not another chapter of the road trip fanfic yet, since i know you guys are probably antsy for more of the fearsome foursome road trip shenanigans. a couple of weeks ago laura marano (she played ally) released an EP called "us," to end her trilogy of me, you, and us EPs, and i quickly fell in love with the message of the EP, specifically breakup song and smoke alarm, which you'll see some lyrics from within this one shot. i thought those two, in particular, would fit well with the breakup austin and ally had when she was in college, in the time that the show didn't cover, so last week i started writing this. it was equally as heartbreaking to write as it was fun, and i love this fic a lot. i promise i will post chapter three of "wherever we go, the song never ends" as soon as i can, and i know it probably wasn't what you were expecting when you got the email notification lol (if you're getting author notifs for me, that it), but for now enjoy this one!
**all song lyrics mentioned in this fic belong to laura marano. i will put notes to tell you where to listen to each one, so you can hear what the song sounds like. also, please go stream the US EP it is a literal masterpiece!
***i didn't have time to edit this thing super thoroughly. i will eventually but beware of spelling errors lol
-EJ
september 2015
a few months after graduation
ally's college dorm— harvard university
around 5:00 p.m.
Ally stared down at her calculus textbook, eyes burning, adrenaline coursing through her body from the mocha with extra shots of espresso that she'd gotten earlier from the campus café. She didn't understand the lesson, and the professor's office hours had long passed because, in true Ally fashion, she told herself that she could figure it out on her own.
Spoiler alert: I can't.
She heard the door open, and turned to greet her roommate, Katelyn, who had just gotten home from choir rehearsal. Katelyn had tried to convince Ally to join an ensemble— like choir or jazz band (she had heard they were looking for a piano player and, being familiar with who Ally was, had suggested she try out within five minutes of knowing her)— but Ally had politely declined, insisting she'd be too busy with her school work. Now, she was kind of regretting it. She had always considered songwriting and music in general a sort of outlet to help deal with school-related stress, but now that she didn't have that, it was becoming hard to manage it in a healthy way.
"Hey," Katelyn said as she dropped her bag next to her desk.
"Hey," Ally responded. "How was rehearsal?"
"Fine." Katelyn shrugged. "It would have been more fun if you were there…" Ally laughed and gave an eye roll.
"I already told you, homework is taking up all of my time. Besides video calls with Austin, of course."
"Am I ever gonna get to meet him?" Katelyn asked. Her short, curly blonde hair bounced as she walked over to the fridge, digging inside of it, in an attempt to find something for dinner. "I mean, you talk about him all the time. Is he ever coming out here to visit?" Her glasses fell down the bridge of her nose slightly, and she pushed them back up as she grabbed her leftover takeout from the night prior.
"Are you asking because you want to meet my boyfriend Austin, or because you want to meet pop star and overnight internet sensation Austin?" Ally asked with a grin.
Katelyn thought for a moment. "Yes." Ally chuckled. She knew how much of a fan Katelyn was of Austin's music, but also knew that she hadn't treated Ally any differently because of her fame, and wouldn't treat Austin any differently, either, if the two ever got the chance to meet.
"Maybe. He's in California on tour right now, but he's supposed to be coming out this way in a couple of weeks. Who knows if he'll even have time to stop by campus, though? His tour schedules have always been crazy busy." Katelyn nodded, but she couldn't help but think that Ally had pretty much avoided her question. It had been two months since they moved in together, and they'd hit it off pretty much right away, becoming good friends within the first few weeks— but she had noticed that Ally talked less and less about Austin as the school year went on. She shrugged, letting Ally know that she would be watching her show over on her bed if she needed her.
"Sounds good. I have a Calculus test tomorrow, and I'd be lying if I said I knew what I was doing… so I'll just be over here, frantically trying to figure that out." Katelyn nodded, climbing up onto her bunk with a smile.
one and a half months later
mid-october
"Hey!" Ally greeted, waving at Austin through her computer screen.
"Hey Ally," he replied with a grin. Ally felt her heart swell at the sight of his shaggy hair, t-shirt that probably hadn't been washed in a few days, and grey sweatpants. It had been a while since they'd talked, but now that she was on her mid-semester break and he had a day off from performing, they could finally FaceTime again. With Katelyn off at an overnight choir retreat, she knew now was as good of a time as ever to call him. "How's school?"
"It's…stressful," Ally admitted. "I don't think I anticipated my classes being this hard. I was always the gifted one in high school, but now that I'm surrounded by literal geniuses…? It's just more difficult than I thought. I barely passed one of my mid-terms, I was so tired." Austin nodded, though he seemed a bit distracted by something in the background. Ally thought for a second she heard Jimmy's voice, and all of a sudden the screen went black. She frowned, tapping her computer screen, as if that would solve anything. "Um… Austin? Hello?" There were a few more seconds of silence, and Ally was ready to hang up when Austin's face appeared again.
"Where did you go?" she asked. "What happened?"
"Sorry, Ally, that was Jimmy. He came to my hotel room door to make sure I was clear on the plan for tomorrow. I had to close my iPad so he wouldn't know I was talking to you…" Austin's voice trailed off. He suddenly looked really tired, Ally noted. She frowned.
"Oh. Okay. So… besides that, how is tour going?"
Austin shrugged. "It's fine. Jimmy's being really overbearing, I'm homesick… and I miss you, of course. I'm just… a little tired of tour life, that's all. I need a break."
Ally nodded. "Yeah, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't extremely homesick, as well. The environment here is very… overwhelming. It feels like I've been thrown into the Hunger Games, except instead of fighting to the death, we're competing to see who's the smartest and the biggest teacher's pet." She paused. "But hey… instead of complaining about how miserable we are, how about we plan how we're going to spend Christmas break? I'll be home for a whole month, so we'll have plenty of time together."
Austin's face lit up. "Yeah… let's do that! I'm so excited to see you, you have no idea. It's been too long."
"Agreed." They talked excitedly about what they were going to do together over Christmas break until past midnight, when Austin's eyes started getting droopy. Before she knew it, he'd fallen asleep on her, and had started snoring quietly. Ally gazed at him for a few seconds before planting a small kiss onto the screen, hanging up, and falling asleep herself.
a couple of months later
december 2015
Austin and Ally walked hand-in-hand along the boardwalk by the beach, among the cacophony of locals and tourists, which were not at all hard to tell apart. Now that Ally was home for Christmas break and Austin was done with tour (for now, at least), they both felt like a weight had been lifted off of their shoulders, at least for a short time, and that they could enjoy their break together. Ally pointed out an ice cream stand not too far away, and they walked towards it together while chatting casually about the newest updates in their lives.
"...and then, when I was playing the Boston show, someone brought actual pancakes to the show, and threw them onstage after the encore. It was a literal dream come true." Ally let out a laugh, but her smile quickly faded.
"Wait… when were you in Boston?" She stopped abruptly in the middle of the sidewalk. Austin frowned, passerby gave them grudging looks as they passed.
"Um… the end of November. Like…the 25th and 26th. Why?" Ally took off her sunglasses. The look in her eyes physically pained Austin.
"Austin… you were fifteen minutes away from Harvard, three days before my birthday, no less, and you didn't even bother to tell me?" Austin's eyes suddenly widened.
Oh, shit.
"Uhhh…" he stuttered.
Say something. ANYTHING!
"Why didn't you call?" she asked, obviously hurt. "Or text? You could have at least let me know you were in the area— you gave me nothing!" Now more angry than sad, Ally stormed away to a nearby bench overlooking the beach and sat down. She felt that familiar burning feeling in her throat, but chose to ignore it. Austin went after her.
"Ally, wait! Can you just let me explain?"
"Explain what?" It came out as more of a demand than a question, which made Austin flinch.
"Ally, I— can you just let me talk?" After she'd calmed down a bit, Austin sat on the bench next to her, on the very opposite end, because if he was being honest, her temper was scaring him. Ally squeezed her eyes shut, shaking her head a little.
"I… sure, yeah. Go ahead."
"I didn't call because… I didn't wanna bother you." Ally narrowed her eyebrows. "I know how important school is to you, and I guess I… just figured even if I asked, you wouldn't want to see me." She frowned.
"It sounds like you just made that up."
"I didn't, Ally," Austin insisted. "I promise. I always want to see you." Ally looked him dead in the eyes.
"Not that time, you didn't." She immediately stood and walked quickly away from him, back down the boardwalk and over to her car. Austin ran after her.
"Ally… wait!"
"If you're gonna try to explain yourself again… don't." She got into her car, started it, and drove off, back toward home while Austin stood there, helplessly.
"I was gonna say that you're my ride home."
fifteen minutes later
"Thanks for picking me up, mom," Austin said as he got into Mimi's car. "Ally got mad and… drove off without me, and it was too far to walk."
"Of course, sweetie." She and Austin rode the rest of the way home in silence. Mimi had detected that something had happened to cause a rift between him and Ally, but felt it was best not to ask unless he brought it up. Austin stared out the window, head leaned back against the seat. His eyes burned, a tear rolled down his cheek.
What is happening to us?
a couple weeks later
christmas eve
"So, Ally," Penny said as she and her daughter prepared Christmas dinner, "How has school been going? How are your classes? Tell me everything." Ally grinned. Her mom had flown in just the day before from Africa to spend Christmas with her and Lester, and they hadn't really gotten a chance to catch up yet.
"Well… I hate Calculus, first off." Penny laughed a bit.
"I remember taking Calculus in college. I hated it, too." Ally let out a laugh as she mashed the potatoes.
"Yeah, it sucks. I do like my Bio class, though. Oh, and British Literature, that one's super interesting."
"Sounds like it. And you and your roommate are still close?"
"Definitely. I can tell she's going to be one of my good friends, even once I graduate," Ally said. "She's super smart— literally a genius— but also isn't afraid to have fun, and I like that about her." Penny nodded, ready to ask how she and Austin were handling the long distance, but was interrupted when the doorbell rang.
"Oh, that's probably grandma and grandpa," she said instead, wiping her hands on a towel. "Let me go get the door quick."
"No, you stay here, mom. I'll get it," Ally said, setting down the potato masher and disappearing over to the front door. Penny turned back to what she was doing, taking the green bean casserole out of the oven, frowning a bit. It was almost as if Ally knew what question she was about to ask, and was looking for an excuse to get out of answering it. Penny shrugged it off, thinking maybe it was just a coincidence, and set the casserole down on a pot holder, following her daughter out of the kitchen.
later that night
After Penny's parents had left and all of the dishes had been cleaned up, she went up to Ally's room, where her daughter had escaped a few minutes earlier to read her book. Ally put her book down when her mom peeked her head into the room.
"Can I come in?" Ally nodded. It took Penny a couple seconds to realize that her face was red and tearstained. Ally sniffed, wiped another one away, and put on her best fake smile.
"Sure, mom. What's up?" Penny's expression changed. She came over and sat down next to her daughter on the bed.
"Oh, honey… what's wrong?"
"What… what do you mean?" Ally stammered. "I'm fine."
"Ally…"
"I'm… reading a sad book," Ally lied. "This," she gestured to her face, "is because of that. Nothing else. It's not like my relationship with Austin is crumbling to bits as we speak… whaaaat?" Upon seeing her mom's concerned face, Ally burst into tears. Penny reached over, wrapped her arms around her daughter as she rested her head on her shoulder. She rubbed Ally's back, whispering things like "It'll be okay. You guys will make it through this." Ally sat up, wiping the tears from her face.
"I don't know if we will, mom. He's been a lot more distant lately, he was in Boston at the end of November and didn't bother to call—or at least wish me a happy birthday. If I didn't know any better, I'd say this is the beginning of the end." She sniffed, bowing her head. She stared down at her comforter, fixating on one particular square of the quilt. "I don't want to break up."
"There must be some explanation as to why he didn't call," Penny said a few seconds later. "It's Austin. He would never forget your birthday."
"Even if he did have one… I kind of don't want to hear it right now." She looked up at Penny. "I appreciate you trying to make me feel better, but… I'd rather just be alone." Penny nodded and stood, heading over to the door to Ally's bedroom.
"I'll be downstairs if you need me," she said, closing the door behind her.
a couple of months later
february 2016
"It's just exhausting, Trish," Ally said, as she stared up at the ceiling of her dorm room. Her best friend had called about an hour earlier so they could catch up— they hadn't talked since Christmas break— and after Ally had told her her how school was going, and Trish had comlpained about how tiring it was to manage such a high-maintenance British boy band, the subject had changed to Austin. Trish knew it would be best to just let Ally rant for a bit, and then impart her two cents of wisdom when she was done.
"We were calling once a week for a while," she explained, "and then once a week turned to once a month, once a month turned to whenever we could find an hour that our schedules lined up… now we haven't talked since our fight over Christmas break. He forgot my birthday and didn't visit while he was on tour in Boston, I got mad at him, we gave each other the silent treatment. Now, I'm just…" Ally sighed. "I'm just lost as to what to do. Do you think we can… salvage the relationship?" She winced a little at her choice of words, but realized it was the only correct way to phrase it.
Trish sighed. "Ally… I don't know what to tell you. It sounds like it may be falling apart at the seams—"
"Because it is," Ally finished. "Who goes two months without talking to their significant other?"
"Apparently you and Austin," Trish muttered. "Anyway, I—" She was interrupted when there was a knock at Ally's door. Ally raised an eyebrow.
"Hold on, Trish, there's someone at the door. I'll be right back, it's probably just Katelyn— she forgets her keys sometimes." Trish grinned a little, trying her best to listen, but Ally was too far away.
Ally sauntered towards the door of her dorm room. "Katelyn, I swear if you forget your key one more time…" She opened the door. "I'm going to have to superglue that thing to yo—" Her jaw dropped. Standing at the door wasn't her roommate, but her boyfriend.
Ally was rendered speechless. "I—uh—Austin, what are you doing here?" she stammered. He was wearing a solid blue t-shirt, a black leather jacket, and jeans. His hair was sopping wet, since it was pouring outside.
"Hey… Ally," was all he said. It was then that she noticed he'd brought a bouquet of orchids and lilies. He held up the flowers awkwardly. "I, um… can I come in?"
"Maybe after you tell me why you showed up at my door unannounced after two months of not saying a single word to me." Austin bowed his head.
"I deserve that. I know I do. But… I had a few days off from touring, I told Jimmy I was going on vacation with my parents, and I… flew here instead. To make up for the first time I was here and forgot to come." Ally found a smile involuntarily forming on her face.
"You did?" He nodded.
"Yeah. And I didn't check the weather before I came, and now I'm all wet and kinda cold—"
"Come in, Austin," she said with a laugh. "Just let me finish talking to Trish and send a text to Katelyn, and I'm all yours." He nodded as she grabbed her phone, and sent a quick text to both Trish and Katelyn explaining how Austin had shown up randomly, and turned back to face him. "So… how've you been?" she asked awkwardly.
"Fine," he responded. Austin handed her the flowers. "These are for you." She took them, grinning a little.
"Thanks." She set them on her desk. "Jimmy still being a pill?"
"Yup."
"I figured."
"How is, uh… how's school?"
"It's fine. I still don't feel like I'm smart enough to be here, and it's already been over half a school year. I mean, don't get me wrong, it's amazing here and I love it, but…" Ally sighed, sitting down on her bed. "I miss home… I miss my dad, and the A&A music factory, making music, I miss Dez and Trish… I miss the way things used to be." When she looked up, Austin's eyes were locked in hers. "And you, of course. I think you're the thing I've missed the most."
"Same." Ally felt herself blushing a little. "That's… kinda why I came." She nodded.
"Yeah," she whispered. "I know." Austin stared down at her comforter, and Ally said, "You can sit down. Go ahead." He sat next to her and turned his body to face her. In the few seconds of silence, Ally realized she'd forgotten to turn off her music, grabbed her phone and pressed pause.
"You can leave it on," Austin insisted. "I like this song."
"You… do?" Ally asked hesitantly. "I never really took you for a 'Fearless' fan. Or a Taylor fan in general."
Austin laughed a little. "Don't you remember Jimmy's Halloween party? I'm a huge Taylor Swift fan. Turn it up." Ally blushed, pressing play and turning the music back up. He grinned, standing up and holding out his hand. "May I have this dance?" Ally took it, smiling.
"You know I'd never say no to a good slow dance." Austin put his arms around her waste, she put hers loosely around his neck as they danced to Taylor Swift's 'Love Story.' "This one is more upbeat… but it'll do." The two of them swayed back and forth to the rhythm of the music (as best they could, anyway), listening to the lyrics.
We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes and the flashback starts, I'm standin' there
on a balcony in summer air
"It feels like it's been so long since you walked into that music store," Ally commented. "We were just babies." Austin grinned.
"We were. We've come so far since then."
"Yeah." Ally tilted her head, like she always did when she was thinking deeply about something. "Well, I mean, in some aspects." Austin frowned. Their dancing slowed, he took his arms out from behind her waist.
"What do you mean, some aspects?"
"I just mean… musically, yes, we've grown. Relationship-wise, we're still figuring it out."
"What do you mean, figuring it out? I think we have our relationship figured out!"
"Really, then what are we?" Ally challenged. "Where are we? I feel like I don't even know where we stand anymore, 'cause we haven't talked for two months and then you show up out of nowhere at my dorm without even bothering to call!"
"I wanted to surprise you! I thought we were in a happy, stable relationship, but now you're making me question everything!" By this time, they were both red-faced, their breathing was shaggy. The music was still blaring in the background.
Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting, all that's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story, baby just say yes…
"Austin, you and I both know this relationship isn't stable or happy anymore. We had one good moment, but here we are again— fighting over nothing." He sighed. Ally bowed her head to hide the fact that she'd started crying, but Austin tipped her chin up.
"We can fix this. I know that we can."
"I don't think you get it, Austin." He pushed the hair out of her face, behind her ear. "We have been trying to make this work since August. With you touring all the time and me being busy with classes and schoolwork— I have no idea how we're going to make this work long-term. The only time we're going to be able to see each other is during Christmas and in the summer. That's not ideal."
"Other people have made it work," he argued. "and so can we. I know it."
"But it was getting tense without the long distance— don't you remember what it was like during Christmas break?"
"Of course, I do. We were fighting 'cause you were being unreasonable."
"So I'm the unreasonable one?"
"Yes!" Austin shouted. Ally flinched a little at his tone of voice. She found herself thinking that the lyrics that were playing were a bit ironic, given that her relationship with Austin was currently falling apart.
'cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter
and my daddy said 'stay away from Juliet'
but you were everything to me, I was beggin you 'please don't go…'
Ally stepped back, noting that this was probably the most intense fight she and Austin had ever been in, and it was happening in a room with walls as thin as paper; her neighbors basically had a front-row seat to the destruction of Auslly. All that was missing was a live video feed and some complimentary popcorn.
She drew in a shaky breath. At this point, tears were streaming down her face, her lip was trembling, heart pounding, hands shaking. Ally couldn't bring herself to speak. She didn't know how. What was she supposed to say to him now? They'd reached an impasse, a difficult intersection that neither of them wanted to cross. At this point, the risk of collision was higher than they both were willing to admit.
"We… we're both going different… different directions," Ally managed to get out. She sniffed, wiped her eyes, looked back up at Austin. He looked irritated, angry— she'd never seen him this way before. "Austin, I…" Her voice caught, and she started crying again. Austin took a step forward. "I don't think I can do this anymore." He nodded, his eyes softened, he reached for her hand.
"Hey… I'm sorry if I upset you. It's okay. We're gonna be okay."
"I don't think we are," Ally said. By this time, her hair had gotten messed up, her face was tomato-red, eyes swollen. She was a mess, and she felt embarrassed that Austin had to see her like this. "Austin…"
"Don't do this," he whispered. "We were literally fighting over nothing— we can fix it!"
"That's not true, this isn't fixable. We both know that," she said, shaking her head. There was a brief pause. She looked at the ground, then up at Austin. "We've… grown apart."
"Don't say that…" His voice trailed off, and he grabbed her hand. "We're not growing apart."
"We can't be together without arguing anymore, Austin." He bowed his head and nodded. As much as he didn't want to admit it, he knew that Ally was probably right.
"Austin." She spoke up again, getting his attention.
"Yeah."
"I need you to do something for me." He nodded.
"Sure. Anything."
"I need you to let me go."
"Ally…" By this point, Austin had tears in his eyes, too. He reached to tuck Ally's hair behind her ear, cupping her cheek lightly with his hand. "I could never let you go."
"Austin…"
"Ally…"
"You need to listen to me," She urged. Ally couldn't stop the tears from coming— they were both nearly sobbing, both already dreading what was about to happen. She knew it wasn't worth denying, they were broken beyond repair. Now, she was just bracing for impact.
"Listen to me," Ally repeated. "This has been a long time coming, we both know that. It will just be easier this way."
"What makes you think that losing you is going to be easy?" Austin snapped. He was now more mad than sad. "Ally, you and I have been best friends since the day we met. You want me to just be okay with not having you in my life anymore?" His voice trembled as he spoke. "Ally, if we break up… we can't stay friends. Not this time."
"I know," she whispered.
"It would be too hard. I don't think I could do it."
"Yeah… me neither." Austin looked down at the floor, watching a tear fall and dissolve into the carpet. He inhaled, already regretting what he was about to say, looking back up at Ally.
"Then… is this the end?" Ally said nothing, just nodding. She found herself reaching for his hand— it had become a habit— and grabbing it, giving it a squeeze. After a couple seconds she finally pulled him in for a hug, and he reciprocated, both of them absolutely losing it as soon as they embraced each other. Ally felt his tears drop onto her t-shirt, and she sniffed again as they pulled away. Austin wiped his eyes, brushed the hair out of his face, and placed a delicate kiss on the top of Ally's forehead, along her hairline. He stepped back, wishing he couldn't see the look on her face, feeling guilty that he had to leave her alone. It had only been a few seconds since they had officially decided the relationship was beyond repair, and Austin was already regretting it.
He picked up his jacket from off the bed and left Ally's dorm room, taking one last look at her before the door closed. I can't believe this might be the last time I see her. Austin made his way back through the halls, down the stairs and outside, where it was still pouring.
Of course it's still raining. Austin felt like he was starring in the worst rom-com ever. He managed to find his rental car among the hundreds of other cars in the parking lot and got inside, turning it on and cranking the heat. He felt cold, miserable, helpless— and it didn't exactly help that he'd just gotten his heart broken, either. Tears cascaded down his face at the rate that the rain was falling; there was no way he could drive, not right now. His hotel was a few minutes away, but Austin decided to find the first flight backto Miami and go home, instead. Staying in Boston would just be dumping salt in his wounds.
Ally watched Austin disappear from view, tears still streaming down her face. Once she was sure he was down the hall and couldn't hear her, she sat back down on her bed. Ally wiped them away, for what felt like the thousandth time that night, but once her eyes locked on the bouquet of lilies and orchids that he'd brought her, a sob escaped her throat. She got up, grabbed the bouquet, and shoved the flowers in the trash can without a second thought, laying back down sideways on her bed, watching the tears drip onto her pillowcase through blurry eyesight. She'd just lost the one good thing, the one constant thing in her life and it was too late to take it all back. It was too late to bring Austin back, and now he might be gone for good.
Her phone buzzed, and she wiped her tears away so she could look at the text— it was from Trish, telling her that it was getting late, she was going to go to bed, and to update her on how things had gone with Austin as soon as she could. This upset Ally even more— her whole entire world had just shattered before her eyes, and Trish had no clue.
Reading through her recent messages, Ally realized she'd missed one from Katelyn, too. About five minutes ago, she'd texted, "Alright, let me know when I can come back. I don't want to intrude." Ally composed herself enough to type a message back: "Austin left, come back when you're ready," but dissolved into tears again when she read it over.
The door to her dorm room opened, and Ally froze. She wiped her face, smoothed out her hair, and turned the other way, facing the wall. She didn't need Katelyn seeing her like this. However when her roommate entered the main room, she could sense something was wrong. Katelyn frowned.
"Ally?" There was no response. Katelyn wasn't the type to poke and prod— she would have much rather let Ally tell her what had happened when she was ready. But she got increasingly more worried when she said her roommate's name again and Ally didn't say anything back. Ally was usually pretty happy to see her, so she assumed that something had gone arye during Austin's visit.
"Ally… I'm back," she said gently. "Is everything okay?" Her heart dropped when Ally shook her head. Alright, she thought. Yes or no questions, it is.
"Don't feel pressured to tell me anything," she added, "but I just want to make sure you're alright." She paused. "Um… is it something school-related?" Ally shook her head. "Homesick?" Another no. "Um…" Katelyn was almost afraid to ask. "Is it about Austin?"
Ally nodded. Katelyn bowed her head, staring down at the floor. She decided not to ask any more follow-ups, and that what Ally needed right now was some space. She grabbed a change of clothes and her towel, and left the room, heading down the hall to the bathroom to shower. Katelyn decided to leave her be, concluding that she probably wouldn't be ready to talk for another day or two. Either way, she knew that the next few days were going to be tough to get through for both of them.
the next day
around 4:00 p.m.
Katelyn entered the dorm room and dropped her bag by the desk, as usual. Ally was still in bed— she hadn't moved all day, and had skipped all of her classes. Katelyn knew it wasn't like Ally to skip an entire day's worth of classes, even because of a breakup— she loved school too much. She took the plastic bag full of things she'd gotten for Ally at the convenience store on campus and started unloading everything. Katelyn had broken up with her long time boyfriend over a year ago, so she'd gotten all of the necessities that she knew would help Ally, such as a healthy Kleenex stash and plenty of comfort foods such as ice cream and oreos. She figured, if they both really needed a good cry later, they could pull up a sappy rom-com on Netflix, but now was not the time for that.
"Hey, Ally," she greeted. "I got some snacks if you're hungry. I'll be over at my desk studying if you need me— I have a big exam tomorrow. Holler if you need anything. Ice cream's in the freezer, oreos are on the counter. Oh, and I brought you Kleenex, too, 'cuz it looked like you were out." She set the new box on Ally's bedside table, heading back over to her desk.
"Thanks," Ally croaked. Katelyn looked back, feeling her heart break at the lack of emotion in her roommate's voice.
"Any time."
It was pretty quiet in their dorm for the remainder of the night— Katelyn studied at her desk, almost feeling bad for using her noise-cancelling headphones to block out Ally's faint whimpering. To make up for it, she checked on Ally every once in a while, refilling her tissue stash and bringing her a few oreos. The two of them seldom talked for the rest of the night, and Katelyn ended up heading to bed early because of her exam. As she fell asleep, she couldn't help but feel sorry for Ally. She concluded that tomorrow, she would try to get her to open up a bit, and at least process through her feelings. She knew that it wouldn't be easy— she had seen and heard all about Auslly's ups and downs on the news and social media, and had envied how close they had been— but also knew that sometimes you had to face hardships in order to begin the healing process, and that was what she was going to help Ally do.
the following afternoon
After the past couple of days, Katelyn knew Ally would need a chill girls' day in, so she cancelled her previous plans that she'd made with her choir friends and instead convinced Ally to get cleaned up so they could watch rom-coms together (but not before reminding her to wear her shower shoes in the bathroom, because that place is a breeding ground for fungus, you know). Ally had reluctantly agreed, knowing that this would be one of the only ways to stop thinking about how sad she was about her and Austin's breakup. Katelyn was always good at taking her mind off of things— she had succeeded in making Ally feel better several times before, when she was homesick or missing her parents and friends, so Ally figured she would give it a shot. And it seemed to be working; the two girls sat in their pajamas, ate ice cream straight from the container, and watched sappy Netflix original films all afternoon. At one point, Katelyn paused the movie and disappeared down the hall to use the bathroom. Ally then realized that she hadn't had the energy to tell anyone besides Katelyn about the other night and decided to send Trish and her mom a quick text, only to find she'd gotten a few missed messages from them both. Feeling guilty about having ignored them but at the same time realizing she'd been going through a lot and had a decent excuse, she typed out a message to send to them both:
Ally: Hey, sorry I've been ignoring your messages from the other day. Austin came to my dorm unexpectedly, we got into a fight and ended up breaking up. Katelyn's been watching out for me, so don't worry. We're chilling today, watching rom-coms. I'm still hurting, but I'll be alright. Love you ❤️
She sent the message separately to them, setting her phone back down as soon as Katelyn got back. Ally wiped a tear that had slid out of her eye, hoping Katelyn hadn't noticed— they hadn't had a conversation about it yet, since Katelyn wanted her to open up when she was ready, but if she noticed that she'd been crying, Ally knew that that would come sooner rather than later.
"Alright," her roommate said cheerfully, grabbing her pint of ice cream in one hand and the remote in the other, "you ready to do this?" She looked over at Ally, grinning, and Ally nodded. Katelyn frowned. "Hey… you alright?"
"I'm fine," Ally insisted, taking another bite of ice cream. "You can play it now." Katelyn reluctantly pressed play, and they continued watching, blankets wrapped around both of them. About five minutes later, when they got to a scene with only the two main love interests, Ally's stomach started to churn, and she was pretty sure it wasn't from only having consumed ice cream that day. As soon as the lead male character pulled his counterpart in for a kiss, Ally stood up.
I can't take this anymore. She headed towards the door of their room, and Katelyn paused the movie.
"Ally!" She scrambled to her feet, just managing to catch her before she opened the door and disappeared. "Hey, what's wrong?" Ally turned back, eyes filled with tears. "You can talk to me. It's okay. And if you need to cry, that's alright, too— I don't judge."
"I… just need to get some air. I'll be back."
"Ally… come talk to me." Katelyn took a few steps forward, and that was when Ally lost it.
She wrapped her arms around Ally without another word, rubbing her back, reminding her that it might hurt now, but she would be okay. They stood there for a few minutes as she calmed down, and finally went back over to the couch where they'd been sitting. Katelyn grabbed a few Kleenex and Ally gratefully took them, letting out a deep sigh.
"I didn't think it would hurt this much," Ally admitted. "Nothing has ever hurt this much. I blew it, Katelyn— he's gone."
"You didn't blow it," Katelyn reasoned, "You guys just grew apart, that's all. You both are too busy." Ally nodded.
"I was the one who initiated it, though. I feel so stupid. Katelyn, do you think I made a mistake?" Katelyn looked at her, eyes deep and sincere.
"If I'm being honest… no." Ally frowned.
"That's not what you're supposed to say!"
"Can you just let me explain why?" Katelyn asked. "I've gone through this myself, you know." Ally sighed and nodded.
"Fine, go ahead." Katelyn pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose before starting to talk.
"When my ex-boyfriend, Jared and I broke up, I thought my life was over. We were going to be high school sweethearts, go to college together, get married, have three kids and a dog— we had it all planned out," she said. "But when he didn't get into Harvard and I did, things got complicated. He felt like me talking about school was 'rubbing my smartness in his face' or something."
"That's… exactly what Austin said to me," Ally said. Katelyn nodded.
"Yeah. So… after a month of fighting about it… it was over. He ended up going to Cambridge— which isn't a bad school either, by the way— and I decided I wasn't going to let the breakup ruin my freshman year of college." She put a reassuring hand on Ally's shoulder. "You still have so many great experiences ahead of you, Ally. I know that you and Austin were close, and your relationship meant a lot, but try not to let it ruin what you have left of this amazing experience." Ally grinned.
"Thanks, that… actually helped a lot. It's nice to know that I have someone here who's got my back, because the person who had it back home was—"
"Austin."
"Yeah." Ally paused. "Well, a lot of people had my back— Trish, Dez, and my parents, just to name a few… but still, that's one less person." Katelyn nodded.
"Definitely know how that feels. Hey, you should set up a time for Trish and I to meet, she seems cool."
"Definitely," Ally said. "I think you two would actually get along well." She grabbed the remote. "Now, let's finish this thing, shall we?"
earlier that day
miami- austin's apartment
Austin rolled over in bed, checking the time on his clock on the bedside table. It was past eleven— he'd been up late, looking through old pictures of him and Ally and crying, which made him even more exhausted. He still had a blinding headache. Austin wished he could just make the pain go away, but he knew that ibuprofen couldn't fix that.
He finally got up, stumbling into the bathroom. He groaned when he saw himself in the mirror: his unshaven face, messed up hair, clothes that he'd been wearing for over two days.
"What is wrong with me?" he said out loud. Austin sighed, stumbling back to his room. He picked up his phone and found that he had about seventeen messages from both Dez and Trish combined. Apparently Trish had made a group chat with just the three of them, and they were both blowing it up at the moment.
Dez: Hey bud how are you? Haven't heard from u in a while, please respond
Trish: everyone is worried about u austin. txt us back pls
Dez: Do you think he's still sleeping? It's past ten
Trish: he's definitely still sleeping. boy is a mess. he seriously has got to get his life in order.
Ouch, Austin thought.
Dez: he did just go thru a breakup you know. he's probably heartbroken
Trish: well he's got to get over it somehow, he's supposed to be back on the road touring in two days! jimmy will be pissed if hes moping around and not performing at 100%. now is not the time for him to feel sorry for himself
Dez: Maybe if we go talk to him he'll feel better.
Trish: great idea. meet you at austins apartment at 11?
Dez: you got it
It took Austin a few seconds to realize that it was eleven o'clock, and that Trish and Dez would be there any minute. He threw on some new clothes and ran a comb through his hair, attempting to make himself look presentable, but he wasn't sure if it made any difference. Not long after, there was another knock at the door. Austin took a deep breath, heading towards the front door and opening it.
"Austin! Buddy, you're alive!" Dez exclaimed, pulling Austin in immediately for a hug. Trish wrinkled her nose a bit.
"What's that smell?"
"That would be me," Austin admitted, "I haven't showered since the breakup."
"Well, that's gonna change. Dez, move aside— I'm comin' in." She shoved Dez and Austin to the side, shutting the door behind her. Dez stumbled, let go of Austin, and sent Trish a dirty look.
"Hey… we were having a moment!" Trish rolled her eyes. She turned to Austin.
"Austin, Jimmy's been calling and texting me for the past two days, wondering where the hell you've been— he says you haven't answered any of his calls or texts, either. You seriously need to pull yourself together, because he's expecting you to hop on a bus again in two days!"
"I know," Austin muttered. "In case you didn't realize it, I've been a little busy." Trish looked around the apartment— from the looks of it, Austin hadn't cleaned the place in days. Dishes were stacked up in the sink like the leaning tower of Piza, clothes were strewn all over the floor, pop cans and wrappers littered the tables beside his couch. Austin suddenly felt embarrassed. If he had known that Trish and Dez were coming today, maybe he would have tried to tidy up a bit.
"Not busy cleaning, that's for sure," she murmured. "Alright, first thing's first: we're gonna help you tidy the place up, then we're gonna help you get out of your funk. That way, it'll smell better in here." Austin turned around, and Trish caught a whiff of his body odor. "And then you're gonna take a shower, because you aren't smelling too great, either."
"I did change clothes," Austin argued, "right before you got here, actually. But before that I hadn't changed them since the breakup, so…"
"Alright then," Trish said. "Step one: Austin, you go take a shower. That alone will make you feel a hundred times better. While you're doing that, me and Dez will start cleaning this place up, then you can put some laundry in and we'll help you get out of your post-breakup slump, and back into tour mode. Sound like a plan?"
"I don't think I have a choice, do I?" Trish shook her head.
"Nope." Austin sighed, heading back over to the bathroom.
"That's what I thought." Trish turned to Dez.
"You start picking clothes up off the floor, I'm gonna start on the dishes. Got it?"
"Why do we have to do Austin's chores?" Dez whined. "Can't he do them himself?" Trish raised an eyebrow.
"Anyone with eyes would agree that the best thing to do is give him a head start on cleaning up around here. Poor guy probably hasn't left his bed since… when did they break up? Thursday?" Dez nodded. "Yeah. And it's Saturday now, so… start grabbin' stuff and throwin' it in the laundry bin." She dragged his hamper out from the closet. "Got it?"
Dez saluted her. "Aye aye, captain."
a few hours later
"Well, I guess we've made quite a bit of progress in here," Trish motioned to Austin's living room, then around to the rest of his apartment. Since Trish and Dez had gotten there, they'd completely decluttered the living room and made the kitchen sparkle. Dishes were now neatly piled up on the dish rack, drying, and all of the pop cans and other garbage had been thrown away, dirty clothes placed in his hamper. "But we still need to figure out what's going on in there," she motioned to Austin's head. "Sit down, we need to talk." Austin nodded, a bit nervous about what they were going to bring up. Trish had made him shower, comb his hair, change into fresh clothes, and shave his face, so he was looking (and smelling) a lot better than before. He sat on the far end of the couch, Trish and Dez piled next to him.
Trish sighed. "When we came here today, the state of the apartment was about what I had expected. You're getting over a breakup— that happened two days ago, no less— and trying to figure out how you're going to sing love songs about Ally onstage in front of thousands of people in two days." Austin's eyes widened.
"I hadn't thought of that part!" he exclaimed, groaning and throwing his head back. "Thanks a lot Trish."
"I wasn't finished," she insisted, turning to Dez. "Man, you were right. He is a piece of work."
"Hey!" he protested.
"Sorry not sorry." Trish shrugged. "We came here to get you back on your feet, get your mind off of it, maybe get you one step closer to moving on. I know that you won't be able to fully move on for a while, and that's okay. But me and Dez are going to take you out, get you some groceries, get you a haircut, maybe get you some new clothes so you can feel confident enough to push through the rest of tour. How does that sound?"
Austin hesitated, looking at the two of them for a moment before speaking again. Trish claimed that some food, a haircut, and groceries could help him get over Ally, but he wasn't sure that was even possible. He didn't think he'd ever get over her, at this point. Finally, he gave a slight nod. "Okay. I guess it couldn't hurt."
"Great. Grab your stuff, we're going to the mall." Dez groaned.
"Why the mall? That place is so boring!"
"You mean, the place where we hung out as a group for, like, our entire high school careers?" Trish asked incredulously.
Dez raised an eyebrow. "Ohhh, that mall. Yeah, that one's fine."
"Wait." Trish and Dez stood, but looked back at Austin. "Could we maybe… go to a different mall? That one will just… remind me of her." Trish sighed.
"If it makes you feel any better, we won't go near the A&A Music Factory. We'll just hit a few other stores and come back. Deal?"
Austin nodded. "Okay."
A few hours later, Trish, Dez, and Austin returned to Austin's apartment with several bags of clothes, food, and other essentials that Austin was out of, but hadn't had the energy to get. As much as he hadn't wanted to admit it, he'd actually had a good time, and it had taken his mind off of Ally and the breakup for a while. Now that they were back, he knew that all bets were off and that Trish and Dez were about to be his personal guidance counselor and hype man when it came to this breakup.
"So…" Trish started, "Now that we've gotten your place— and you— cleaned up, we should talk."
"About… what?" Austin played dumb, but he knew what was coming. Dez sighed.
"About Ally, duh! What else did you think we were gonna talk about?" Trish shot him a look.
"Very subtle."
"I know. That's kinda my thing." Dez looked pleased with himself. Trish just rolled her eyes.
"Austin, I think I'm speaking for the both of us when I say that we want the best for you. We want you to have fun on tour, but in order for you to do that, I think you need to process through some feelings about it first." Austin sighed.
"Yeah, I know."
"So… you went to Ally's dorm Thursday night, right?" He nodded. "Just to visit?"
"Yeah. I brought her flowers, we slow danced to Taylor Swift— everything seemed fine, until it wasn't." Austin found his voice catching a bit. He cleared his throat. "Do we really have to do this? I process things better by writing music." Trish shrugged.
"I don't see why you can't do that," she said. "I just thought if we had a better idea of what happened, we'd be able to help you work through it." Austin nodded.
"I know," he said. "But there's really nothing more to tell… we got into an argument about the long distance, she said it wasn't working, I said we could try to make it work since others have done it before, she kept denying it… and things just went downhill really fast. That's all there is to it." Trish nodded, but before she could speak up again, Dez butted in.
"If I may," he said, "It sounds like you were the optimist in this situation, and she was looking through it more realistically. You guys just weren't on the same page, that was the problem." Austin raised an eyebrow.
"Huh?"
"That actually makes sense," Trish said. She looked over at Dez. "Since when are you so smart?"
"What can I say?" Dez asked, smirking. "They call me the love whisperer."
"No one calls you that," Trish and Austin whispered back at the same time.
"I'm… still confused," Austin said, one eyebrow raised.
"Ally was being the realist, aka she knew the relationship wouldn't work out with you on the road all the time and her at school. You were the optimist, trying to convince her that it could— but she knew that the longer you guys dragged out the breakup, the more it would hurt in the long run." Austin nodded.
"That… makes sense now. We both just thought differently about the whole long distance thing."
"Exactly."
"Wow," Trish put in, "I never thought that out of the two of us, it would be Dez giving you the better advice. But… he's right, you know. Jace and I didn't make it long distance, 'cause it was a hard thing to do."
"These things are never easy," Dez said. "But it also depends on how you react. You're never gonna get over Ally if you stay in bed all day, feeling sorry for yourself." He grabbed Austin's notebook off of the ottoman sitting in front of him. "Now, I believe this belongs to you?"
Austin mustered a grin, grabbing it from Dez. "Thanks, guys. This really helped."
"Any time, bud. Now, we'd better get out of here so you can write your next big hit." Dez and Trish left, and Austin thanked them both, already feeling a lot better. He was incredibly thankful for his best friends all the time, but especially now. He picked up his pen and started scribbling lyrics in his notebook.
A/N: ally writes the lyrics for "breakup song" in the next scene, so press play on that right now if you wish! also, i never said it in the scene but the song that austin started writing in the last scene is do it again :)
one month later
mid-march
The past month had been quite an adjustment for both Austin and Ally— Austin had to force himself to muster the courage to sing his classic hits (that were basically all about Ally) onstage, and Ally had to power through mid-terms. The end of the school year was approaching, and although she didn't consider herself completely healed from the breakup yet, Ally had found other ways to help keep her distracted and busy. It was only those moments where she found herself a little lonely and sad that made her want to pick up the phone and call him, but she knew that she couldn't.
In that time, Katelyn had somehow convinced her to join choir, and Ally enjoyed it so much that she had filled out a form to request adding a music minor. It was only her freshman year, so she had plenty of time to complete the required classes, plus since Katelyn was a music major herself, she'd have a lot of classes with her roommate and that would just give them something else to talk about. Ally became more and more excited about the opportunities that lie in front of her with each passing day.
One day, she was at her desk about to staple together a paper that was due the next day when a notification lit up her phone. She picked it up to check it, and realized that her lock screen was still a picture of her and Austin. Every time, she saw the picture and felt her stomach twist itself into knots, and vowed to change it but she never did. It had been the same picture for years— the one that had been taken as they performed onstage at the Jungle Cafe, Austin holding his guitar as they gazed into each other's eyes. It was such a good picture; she couldn't bring herself to change it. That would mean she would have to move on.
Ally read the notification, a message from Trish about their plans for spring break. They were going to get their nails done, go to the spa, and just spend the week relaxing together. It was only about a week away, and all Ally had to do to see her best friend again was to get through about three more mid-term exams.
Easier said than done.
After she'd sent a text back, Ally opened her desk drawer to grab her stapler and froze. There in her desk were five letters that Austin had written her right after graduation, labeled with different messages on the outside such as "read when you miss me" or "read when you need a confidence boost." She hesitated before picking one of them up— the one that said "read when you need a reminder of how much I love you." Ally's breath caught as she opened it and read what he'd wrote:
Ally,
I'm so proud of you for going to college at your dream school. I always knew you could do it. No matter what happens, know that I love you so much and always will. You are so important and special to me. I hope this is a good pick-me-up for when you are having a bad day. Miss and love you.
-Austin
Ally watched as her tears dripped onto the paper, splotching the ink to the point that it was almost unreadable. As luck would have it, Katelyn walked into the room a few seconds later, dropping her bag by her desk. She noticed immediately that something was wrong, and went over to see what Ally was reading.
"Ally…" Her roommate looked up at her, eyes red and puffy. She didn't even care if Katelyn saw her like this— at this point, it was a common occurrence.
"I… I forgot about these letters," she managed to get out. "Austin wrote them for me. There's five of them. They were, like, buried in my desk drawer and I just found them now."
Katelyn paused for a second before responding, knowing that if she told Ally to get rid of the letters she would refuse, and if she told her to keep them Ally would quite literally look at her like she was out of her mind. Either way, it would be a lose-lose; keeping them would make Ally miserable, and taking them away would drive her nuts because she'd obsess over what was inside. "You have a choice here, Ally," she finally said. "Either keep the letters or get rid of them. It's that simple."
"I… don't wanna get rid of them," Ally admitted. "Whether we're together or not, he… still wrote them for me. It can be like a… keepsake or something."
"But is this a keepsake that's even worth keeping?" Katelyn asked. She dragged her desk chair over to where Ally was sitting. "Maybe you need to get rid of them so that you can move on."
"I don't even want to move on," Ally argued. "Everybody I've met through the music program here keeps telling me that the music I'm gonna write in the months following the breakup will be the best stuff I've ever written, but… I just want Austin back. I don't want to write some stupid breakup song about him."
"I know that. Everyone who's ever gone through a breakup—myself included— knows how you feel. But Ally… reading Austin's letters and wearing his sweatshirt… that's not coping. That's taking steps backwards." Ally bowed her head, staring at the carpet as if she saw something interesting, but then looked up at her roommate.
"What if… I could make a song out of that?" she whispered, frantically searching for a notebook that didn't have notes scribbled in it. She flipped to a blank page and started jotting down words as Katelyn watched, slightly confused. After a few seconds, she looked up.
"Cope… cope… Katelyn, what rhymes with cope?"
"Um… trope, rope… dope?" Katelyn suggested. "If you don't need it to rhyme exactly, then… wrote, maybe? Or… tote?" She paused. "Am I helping at all, or do you want me to stop?" Ally's eyes widened as she scribbled down more lyrics.
"No, that's… Katelyn, you're a genius!" she exclaimed. Ally picked up the notebook and showed it to her. Katelyn grinned.
it's been a month now
don't really know how to cope
still wear your sweatshirt
still read those letters you wrote
"Ally, these lyrics… they're amazing!" Ally blushed.
"Thanks. Only problem is, that's all I've got." She turned her head back towards Katelyn. "I have a really crazy idea, and I want you to hear me out."
"Oh…kay…?"
"What if… what if the whole premise of the song is 'I don't want to write a breakup song, but I have to?' Like, I'd rather have him than write breakup songs about him. Or something."
"Ally, what're you doing calling me a genius? You're the genius!" Ally squealed.
"I can't believe it… Katelyn, we just came up with the idea for a new song!" She jumped up from her seat to hug her roommate, and they burst into a fit of giggles.
"See? Breakups aren't all bad," Katelyn reasoned. "It hurts at first, but… they teach you to lean into the people you trust, and then your relationships with them grow." Ally nodded.
"You're right. Thanks for being here for me, Katelyn… you're literally the best."
"Aww, stop it." Katelyn waved a hand, then grabbed Ally's notebook off her desk. "Now… wanna go mess around in the studio, see if we can come up with a melody for your next big hit?" Ally nodded.
"Let's do it."
A/N: this next scene has some lyrics you might recognize in it (*cough* they're from smoke alarm *cough*). you know what to do :)
a year and a half later- october 2017
ally's apartment- near harvard campus
about eleven o'clock p.m.
After several hours of studying for Anatomy II and getting nowhere, practically driving herself crazy in the process, Ally finally shut her textbook and started getting ready for bed. She brushed her teeth, pulled on pajamas, and fell into bed, exhausted from another long day of classes and song writing in the studio. She had decided to release 'breakup song' over a year ago, and it had done really well, so she'd taken that as a sign to release more music and was coming out with an EP in about a month. Since she'd been spending a lot of time in the studio lately and the rest of her day was taken up by classes and rehearsals, Ally barely had any time for herself.
Almost as soon as she laid down, Ally fell fast asleep. Around five hours later, she woke up to what she assumed was her alarm clock, but quickly found it was the smoke alarm. She rubbed her eyes and turned on the lamp on her bedside table, squinting as her brain woke itself up. It was a few seconds before she'd fully comprehended that it was broken. To make matters worse, her roommates weren't currently at home, meaning she'd have to figure out how to fix it all by herself.
Silently begging that all of this commotion wouldn't wake up her neighbors, Ally dug in her closet for a step stool and finally found one, setting it beside the bed. It didn't reach high enough however, and she had to resort to standing on the bed. She used her step stool to get on top and, after gaining her balance, she reached up to grab the smoke alarm, twisting it and pulling down. The beeping was so loud that she thought she was going to go deaf, but she still brought it out to her kitchen table, grabbed her tool kit and started unscrewing the cap with a screwdriver. As soon as she got the cap off, she ripped the batteries out. Problem solved.
Right?
Nope. It kept on beeping. Ally groaned, turning the smoke alarm over, tugging at wires and cords, before deciding that she was going to electrocute herself if she didn't stop messing with it. Since her roommates weren't home and calling her parents would be no use, Ally searched for a tech support number on the label that she could call. Maybe they could give her guidance as to how to stop the beeping, she reasoned. A thought crossed her mind briefly— what if I call Austin?— but she shook it off, knowing that she couldn't. She hadn't physically talked to him in over a year, and who knows if he'd even know what to do, anyway? Ally finally found a number printed on the small label near the bottom and dialed it. She drew in a shaky breath, pleading silently for someone to pick up. It was four thirty in the morning— did they even have tech support 24 hours a day?
Ally was on the phone with tech support for over an hour with a man whose voice sounded exhausted (and, frankly, a little fed up with her constant apologies) before she finally got it to stop beeping. By this time, the tears that had been streaming down her face had ceased, and she could breathe a little better now. When she hung up, she stared at the broken smoke alarm, its wires sticking out everywhere putting her head in her hands.
It's just a broken smoke alarm. There's no fire. Why's it so hard to breathe?
Ally decided that, since it had stopped beeping, she should probably try to get some sleep. However after tossing and turning for about an hour, to no avail, she flipped on the lamp on her bedside table, squeezing her eyes shut and letting out a deep sigh. When she looked back over to the other side of the bed, she saw none other than Austin sitting there.
Ally sat up. Am I hallucinating? she thought. Maybe there really is a fire. She grinned, scooting closer to him.
"Hey."
"Hey," he said. She found herself reaching for his hand, but couldn't grab onto it. Ally frowned. "What's wrong?"
"Well, I…" she paused. "Nothing. It's stupid."
"No, Ally, you can tell me." She sighed.
"Well, there was a… broken smoke alarm in my apartment, and it woke me up in the middle of the night. I started freaking out and I was about to call you, but… then I remembered that I can't. And it's all my fault. God, how could I be so stupid?" Ally tilted her head back and leaned against the headboard, tears welling up in her eyes, throat burning. "Austin, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault, I… never should have let you go. I never should have broken up with you." Another pause. "Will you take me back?"
But when she looked over, he was gone.
Ally dissolved into a fit of sobs again, kicking herself for believing he was really there. Of course she'd been imagining it. Austin didn't have teleportation powers— he couldn't just show up within a moment's notice.
She reached over and grabbed her notebook and a pen, and flipped to an empty page, not to write lyrics but to journal; she needed to get her feelings out somehow. The way she usually did that was talking to Katelyn and her other roommate, Ella, who they'd met through the music program, but they weren't there. Her parents were sleeping, so was Trish. And she knew from experience that waking Trish up, even for this, would not end well.
Ally started scribbling in her notebook, letting all of the jumbled thoughts from her brain go through the pen and directly onto the page.
This morning I woke up to a broken smoke alarm. It was 4:30 in the morning. The whole time I was freaking out, I couldn't catch my breath. I couldn't help but think what would have happened if Austin were here— we'd probably be freaking out but then look at it and laugh later. I actually saw him… I don't know if I was hallucinating or what. It's been over a year, why does my heart still hurt?
Ally felt a little better after that, and decided to try going back to sleep again. She turned her lamp off and tossed and turned, trying her best to get back to sleep.
about a year and a half later
may 2019
Ally grabbed a box filled with clothes from her room, brought it out to the kitchen, set it on the table and sealed it up with packing tape. It was officially finals week, meaning she would have to be out of her apartment after graduation, which was in only a few days. She set it on top of the stack that was already piling up near the door, and turned to go pack up another box when her phone rang. She ran over to pick it up, and grinned when she saw Trish's caller ID.
"Hey!" she exclaimed, "I'm just working on packing up the apartment. What's up?"
"Oh, I'll let you get back to that," Trish said, "But I just wanted to let you know… I have a big surprise for you when you get back. Like… huge surprise. One that's gonna blow your socks off." Ally laughed.
"Great, I… can't wait to find out what it is!"
"Trust me, you're gonna thank me later." Trish paused. "Maybe. You might be mad at me first, but… you'll thank me. I think." She looked over at Dez, who was listening in since she had it on speakerphone.
"Way to be subtle." She rolled her eyes.
"I'll just see you when I pick you up at the airport, yeah?" Trish asked.
"Sounds great, I'll see you then."
A few hours later, Ally's parents arrived to help her pack up her things and load it into the truck, which they'd be driving back to Miami. When they were done, she took one last look around the apartment before flipping the light switch off and closing the door behind her.
so, that's that! let me know what you think, i'll be busy the rest of the day with the concert stuff but i always love reading y'all's reviews. stay tuned for a new chapter of the road trip fic soon. thanks so much for reading, i love you all! :) -EJ