Brilliant diagnosis, Dr Harry
Ron has a lot to discuss this Saturday morning. Yesterday was his first practice for the reserve team of Chudley Cannons so it is perfectly understandable he is pretty psyched and wants to pick apart every detail of the practice with his best friend. Sadly, his audience is anything but captive.
Harry seems distracted and worried, which Ron can easily notice as his friend has been the happiest, he has ever seen him in these last few months. Although, in Ron's opinion his friend's happiness is more due to the fact, that he has finally moved in with his godparents, than the fact he has defeated Voldemort. Priorities and all that.
"Harry, mate, you're not listening to a word I am saying."
"Uh, sorry, Ron. Go on, I promise to pay attention."
Ron sighs. He really had his heart set on debating the practice while it's still fresh in his mind.
"I'll tell you later. You go first."
Harry hesitates. While eager to tell someone of his fears, he knows they become real as soon as he voices them.
"I think… Well… Eva is dying," he bursts out.
Ron nearly spits out his pumpkin juice.
"What? What happened?"
Harry's hand trembles as he pushes it through his messy hair and Ron feels fear grip his insides. Not again. Can't his friend ever get a break? He just got his family. The thing he has always longed for the most. Hermione may sometimes accuse him of having emotional depth of a teaspoon, but Ron is not completely clueless. Boys just don't talk about certain things.
"Nothing happened. She's just so tired all the time."
Ron relaxes a little.
"And that makes you think she is dying?" he asks doubtfully.
Harry realizes how ridiculous that sounds.
"It's not just that. She has cut down on her hours and stopped working night shifts completely. And she is still so tired, even working less. Often, when I come home, Sirius says she is sleeping. It doesn't matter the hour of the day. I haven't actually seen her in two days. And the last time I did see her, she was pale with bags under her eyes, and I could swear I heard her puking just a few minutes before."
Ron still doesn't think it sounds all that dire, but it is strange. He shifts uneasily and Harry wishes Hermione was here with her reason and her logic. She would know. Or at least reason with him.
"Merlin, why did Hermione have to go to that conference now?" Ron obviously agrees with Harry wholeheartedly.
The back door of the Burrow opens with a bang and two identical redheads come barging onto the porch, yelling exuberant hellos.
"What's with the long faces?" one of them (Harry thinks it's George) asks, noticing their lack of excitement.
"Harry thinks Eva is dying," Ron announces.
"Ron!" Harry yells reproachingly.
"What? Maybe they've noticed something."
Harry rolls his eyes but concedes.
"Why do you think she's dying?"
When Harry doesn't immediately explain, Ron summarizes the situation to the twins, who both look deep in thought, but are also sceptical.
"Maybe she has a cold."
"Or she is just coming down from the high of the war," they suggest.
Harry shrugs, unconvinced.
"Didn't you ask Sirius?" Ron remembers.
"I asked if there is something wrong with her when she put on her pyjamas and went to sleep right after work at three in the afternoon! And he said she is just tired," Harry tells them, frustration colouring his voice.
"But how did he seem? Sad? Angry?"
Harry thinks about it. "No…"
"Normal then?"
"Not really. Distracted. Worried maybe? He smiled weirdly," he recalls.
"I think, if it was something horrible, Sirius wouldn't be able to hide it. You know how he is," Fred says.
"Maybe he already came to terms with it," Harry suggests.
"And you missed all that coming to terms with?" Fred says mockingly. They all know how Sirius is. There would be hell to pay.
Harry shrugs. Okay, maybe not.
"He came to the Tuesday night drinks like always, right? And he seemed perfectly normal to me," Ron tells them.
"He didn't want to go. For the first time ever," Harry says glumly. "He said he isn't going but then Eva convinced him to go. Practically shoved him out of the door."
"Oh." The Weasley boys exchange anxious glances.
"Now that I think about it," George starts slowly. "He and Lupin did talk pretty intensely."
"Remus is in on it?" Harry grits his teeth.
"Hold your horses, Harry. He looked pretty confused. I don't think he knows anything."
Harry doesn't know if he can believe that or not. Maybe he should talk to Remus anyway.
"Did the two of you also notice anything?" Harry asks hopefully, looking at sombre faces.
"Well," the other twin starts, reluctant to confirm Harry's fears in any way. "You remember that picnic at the Burrow about two weeks ago? I didn't think anything of it at the time because you know how they can be, Sirius and Eva. Two weirdos," he says it with affection and the others chuckle too. "But they were even weirder. Eva seemed fine to me. Not really the life of the party but what can you expect when she was sipping on that lemonade all day. But Sirius did appear kind of frazzled. He kept running after her like a lost puppy, standing not more than two feet away at all times. Like she was about to keel over." Fred regrets his choice of words as Harry winces and continues in a rush. "But she seemed in perfect health, really. Snarled at him, that she can find the bathroom on her own and everything. I couldn't hear everything, but they seemed normal, the way they consider snapping at each other normal."
Harry slumps into his chair, not comforted at all.
"Yesterday he made soup. Sirius, that is. He cooked and he never cooks. And we never have soup. Soup is for sick people. As is tea," he declares as if that is the ultimate proof of dying.
"And she drank tea?"
"Not yet."
Silence ensues as each is caught in their own thoughts. The door opens again, this time more slowly, and Ginny pokes her head outside.
"Hey, guys. Who died?" she asks, not waiting for an answer as, who could have possibly died, the war was over. "Hey, Harry, mom wants you to take some vitamin potions to Eva before you leave. She used to feed them to us when we were ill and let me tell you, I don't envy Eva at all. They are gross. Remember, Ron?"
But Ron doesn't answer her. As does nobody else. All the boys are looking at Harry worriedly.
Harry's throat tightens as his worst fears are confirmed. He gasps for air as his airway gets narrower and narrower and his vision blurs.
"Harry, mate, calm down. This doesn't mean anything." Ron is at his best friend's side, trying to get to him. But Harry can't hear him.
"What the hell? Harry, what is it? What did I say?" a clueless Ginny exclaims.
"Harry thinks Eva is dying." The twins clue her in as a still gasping Harry can't answer her.
"Oh, Merlin. Harry, I'm so sorry. But this really doesn't mean anything," she says soothingly. "Mom gave us those potions for all kinds of things, mostly for minor colds. Sometimes even when the neighbour's kids were sick, and she didn't want us to catch something."
It takes a while for Harry to calm down. And a sip of Arthur's special secret schnapps (twins' courtesy).
"Say, Harry," Ginny suddenly starts with a strange voice. She sounds like a light has suddenly been switched on in her brain and all the boys look at her with interest. "Has she gotten any… Has she gained weight?"
The boys all perk up, knowing what their sister is getting at. Harry thinks about the last time she stood in front of him; pale, weak, fragile, with shaky limbs and a sunken face.
"No. I've never seen her thinner," he tells them tragically.
"Oh." Ginny deflates and all of them sink back into their chairs.
Harry once again feels panic rising in his chest. Why is this happening? He just got his family. He waited sixteen years for this. And why doesn't anybody say anything? Why didn't Sirius tell him that Eva is dying? He has the right to know! He can take it! Merlin, can he? He needs to spend time with her! While he still can.
"I have to go," he declares and gets on his feet abruptly.
"Harry, mate, maybe…"
"I have to go find out what's happening. Maybe we can still do something," he rambles, not heard anything about simple colds or end of the war downs. He just knows it isn't that. He knows it. "And if there's nothing… I have to be there! While there's still time."
He sounds so heartbroken, that nobody protests against his leaving anymore. As he rushes home with a bag of Mrs Weasley's vitamins clutched in his hand, he leaves behind a deadly silence.
Harry sprints from the Burrow to the apparition point as fast as his legs and lungs allow him. He apparates, not caring he has bumped into another wizard, nearly splinching himself and continues his sprint to his home as soon as his legs hit the pavement, ignoring angry calls behind him.
The more time it takes for Harry to get to his house, more his panic mounts, nearly suffocating him. The run from the apparition point to his house has never seemed so long before. He needs to get home. He needs to see her. God, what if she's already… He will never forgive Sirius for this! Never!
He bursts through the front door in full sprint, making such racket, that Sirius drops the clock he has spent the last two hours fixing. The clock shatters into thousand little pieces. Sirius curses violently.
"Seriously, Harry! Do you need to enter the house like a thousand angry hippogriffs?" he scolds his godson. He does so seldom, but Harry has almost given him a heart attack. Harry doesn't even acknowledge his words. His eyes search the house hopefully, but the only person he can see, is his godfather.
"Where's Eva?" he croaks.
"She's resting," Sirius informs him, looking at him weirdly. "Is something wrong?"
"Resting? It's not even noon!" Harry all but barks.
Sirius raises his eyebrows at Harry's rudeness.
"Well, she was tired," Sirius says slowly.
Harry stares at his godfather, trying to detect any signs of deception or worry or something. But all Harry can see is worry for him and his strange behaviour. He deflates. Sirius has enough on his plate. He shouldn't add to it. He shouldn't take his anger out on the man that has suffered so much in his life, took him under his roof, gave him a family he so longed for and is now dealing with his girlfriend dying.
"Is she not feeling well?" Harry tries again, prodding him into talking, softer this time. He needs to know.
"She's just a little under the weather," Sirius shrugs, bending to start picking up tiny pieces of the shattered clock.
Harry frowns at this. He raises the hand, still clutching the bag of vitamin potions. "Mrs Weasley sent her some kind of vitamin potions," Harry says, hoping Sirius will get a hint and tell him the truth.
Sirius grimaces. "I'm not sure those concoctions will do her any good, but I guess it can't hurt. You should make her some tea so they will be easier to swallow and take them to her," Sirius suggests kindly.
"Tea?" Harry repeats with strange hollow voice.
"Yes, tea. She likes the camomile. She says it settles her stomach," Sirius says distractedly, getting on his knees, trying to reach all the pieces under the table.
"TEA IS FOR SICK PEOPLE!" he yells shrilly. He doesn't think he would recognize his own voice. Panic raises again and he gasps for air. Sirius hits his head on the table at Harry's yell, drops all the pieces he has managed to pick up and curses violently. He gets on his feet in a second.
"Harry, what-"
"Tea is for sick people. And soup. You always say that. You and Eva always say that. She is sick, isn't she? Tell me the truth! I can take it, just tell me!"
"She isn't-"
"Stop lying to me! She's dying, isn't she?! ISN'T SHE?" Harry keeps gasping for air as Sirius tries to get him to listen to him unsuccessfully.
"Harry, I promise you, she-"
"Stop being so selfish!" Harry yells at his godfather with angry tears in his eyes. He has forgotten all about his resolution to not take his anger out on Sirius. Harry is angry and Sirius is after all, the only one there to take it. "I have the right to know. She is my family too! Maybe there is something we can still do. What can we do?"
"Harry, listen to me." But Harry is beyond listening to any kind of reason. He doesn't hear his godfather's soothing voice.
"I want more time with her," he practically wails, not caring about what Sirius might think about him. He is beyond caring about such trivialities. Sirius watches him wide eyed. He has never seen his godson in such a state. "Can I just see her?" he cries desperately. His tears fall freely from his wide emerald eyes. His glasses are foggy and crooked, and he can hardly catch a breath. "Can I just sit with her? Even if she's resting. I won't bother her, I swear. I just want to see her. What if she dies tomorrow? I haven't seen her in two days. Can't I just see her?"
He keeps repeating the same mantra, that he wants to see her. His eyes unfocused and nothing that Sirius tries to tell him gets through him. Seeing his desperate godson, some foreign instinct wakes up in Sirius and he knows exactly what to do. He stops trying to get him to see reason and simply draws him into his arms, holding him tightly. Harry at first resists weakly, but soon can't help but lean into his godfather with his whole body and clutches his t-shirt into his desperate fists, somehow still holding a bag of Mrs Weasley's vitamin potions.
"Of course, you can see her. You can always see her. She will be so happy to see you too. You will have more time with her. I promise." Sirius keeps repeating those words to his godson, hoping something is getting through to him. He continues to hold him and slowly his gasping sobs turn into tiny hiccups.
The sound of bare feet padding on the hardwood floor alerts him to her presence and he turns his head slightly to look at her approach. Worry is attached into every line of her face. There's no doubt she has heard everything. Still, she gives him a small smile, that is so full of affection and pride, he hopes she will continue to smile like this at him for the rest of his life.
She turns her eyes to their godson, still clinging to Sirius like his life depends on it. He tightens his arms around him and when she meets his eyes again, a look of understanding passes between them. They both feel a little guilty for not noticing Harry's obviously mounting anxiety. There have been hints about his abandonment issues but none of them knew how deep they ran. Mostly, because Harry always seemed so fine. And sometimes they were just too busy dealing with their own issues.
She approaches them slowly, slightly leans on Sirius' side and puts her palm on Harry's back, rubbing soothingly. It takes a while for him to notice her presence.
"Eva?" he croaks, finally stepping away from Sirius' embrace.
"Hey, Harry." She smiles at him.
He examines her from head to toe and even through foggy glasses and wet eyelashes he notices she looks really tired. And now he has added to her worries with his behaviour. He feels suddenly very guilty for causing her more stress.
"You- You should go back to bad," he stammers. "You're tired. I'm sorry for waking you."
"No. I am sorry that you haven't seen me in two days."
Harry looks away embarrassed. "You are tired. And sick. It's okay."
"It's not. At all." She grips his chin lightly, her thumb wiping away the wetness on his cheek. "And I'm so sorry for making you worry about me like this. It's all my fault. I wanted to wait at least three months before telling-"
"Three months?" he rasps, stepping away from her. "That's so long… All this time we could have-"
"Harry, I am not dying," she tells him firmly. He stares at her suspiciously. "I'm not lying. I wouldn't lie about something like this." She looks at Sirius. "We wouldn't lie to you. I am not dying. Okay?"
Harry looks at both of them before he reluctantly nods. "Okay," he agrees. "But- But you drink tea," he says desperately.
Eva frowns at him. "So?"
"You never drink tea. You said tea is for sick people," he declares indignantly.
Eva can only stare incredulously. "And this made you think I'm dying?"
Harry shrugs. "And other things." He ramblingly tells them of all the little things he has seen and at the end of his speech he has almost convinced himself Eva is dying all over again.
"Harry, look at me." Sirius grips his shoulder until Harry looks at him. "Eva is not dying. I promise."
Harry looks from one face to another to find his godparents giving him small smiles. "But- Here, Mrs Weasley sent you this. Ginny said she had to take them when she was sick." He offers the bag of potions to Eva, almost challengingly.
Eva takes the bag and grimaces when she looks inside. "I will have to thank Molly for this. Although these are probably only going to make things worse."
She finds Harry looking at her expectantly. "Worse?"
Eva gives Sirius a reproachful look. "Why didn't you say something if you've seen how worried he is?"
"What? You said we're not saying anything for the first three months!"
Eva rolls her eyes. "That was the plan but not at any cost!"
"Well, how was I to know that?"
"Don't you have any common sense? Of course, you don't, what was I thinking?!" She throws her hands in the air. "You should have just told Harry."
"You didn't say anything!"
"I'm sorry if I was too busy puking my guts out!"
As Harry's head swivels from Eva to Sirius and back, his shoulders finally sag in relief and tension rolls off his back. This he is familiar with. This is normal. The sound of their bickering is like homecoming. Like a warm blanket on a cold winter day.
He clears his throat as they seem to have forgotten about him.
"Oh, Harry, honey, I'm sorry." Eva's eyes shine brightly, and her face seems to have finally gotten some colour. "I'm not dying. I'm just pregnant."
"Oh." Harry thinks over the last two weeks; the puking, the tiredness, the lemonade drinking, the tea drinking, the soup, Sirius' strange behaviour… He knows very little of pregnancies so it may as well be.
"Harry?" They both stare at him expectantly and a little bit anxiously.
"But you're so thin. And you lost weight," he blurts out.
Eva laughs at this. "It's this morning sickness. Or all-day sickness. And sometimes even an overnight sickness. It will get better in a few weeks. That's also why I wanted to wait to tell you. I didn't want to be half dead for this conversation. But no worries, in a few months I will be as fat as a whale."
"Because you're pregnant. And then you'll have a baby," Harry says distractedly.
"That's generally how it goes," Sirius confirms with a slight chuckle.
"Harry? Are you okay with this?" Eva asks anxiously.
Harry thinks about this. Everything is about to change. His godparents have been so focused on making their relationship work. To make their family work. They have been on Harry's side since they have been reunited. With them he has finally gotten what he always wanted, a family. Even if they couldn't be with him in his childhood, they have been trying to make up for it. And Harry doesn't remember a period in his life when he was happier, more complete. And now everything will change.
Harry laughs a little in the hand, he drags over his face. "Yes. Yes, I'm okay with this."
And he is. Because things are about to change. But not for worse. Harry has always longed for a family. And now he will have even more family. A baby. A new life. It will bring joy into their lives. It will bring joy to his godparents, who had suffered so much loss in their lives. And it will bring joy to Harry. And Harry suddenly can't wait.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. Yes!" he exclaims. "Of course, I'm okay. I'm more than okay. Did you think I wouldn't be?"
Eva shrugs. "We have just settled into a routine, and this will be a big change."
Harry laughs again as he was just thinking that. "I always wanted a family and you've given it to me. This baby will just mean an even bigger family. I'll have a baby cousin."
Eva tears up at his words. "Oh, Harry, we were thinking you'll have a baby brother or a baby sister," she tells him with a trembling lip.
Harry swallows a lump in his throat. "Really?" He looks at his godfather, who nods at him. "I would love to."
Eva pulls him into his arms, sniffling into Harry's neck. Harry gives a questioning glance at his godfather over her shoulder. Eva Marlowe is not a crier. Sirius winks at him, rubbing Eva's back.
"It's hormones apparently. I once saw your mom chase your dad around with a pitchfork when she was pregnant. I consider myself lucky."
Eva releases her godson to glare at Sirius. "There's still time," she tells him darkly. "It will be a long nine months."
Sirius smiles charmingly. "I have no doubt."
"Oh my god," Harry breathes wide eyed.
"What is it?"
"I just convinced half the Weasley family you're dying."