(I wish I owned Percy Jackson, but I don't)

Desperate measures

As I ran through the forest, I still felt like my head was going to break apart. It was not just a battle between Greeks and Romans, but between my values and what I had done in my immortal life. For millennia, I have led the Hunt as basically an anti-male cult. One of the reasons that I developed a hatred for men since my first moments in the world was how unbearable it was to share a womb with the idiot that was Apollo. Before his trials. Before he changed.

When I was about three hours old, I decided that I didn't want to marry anyone, stay as a maiden forever, and lead a group of nymphs, demigods, and mortals who also had problems with men. But looking again at my decision, it seems very foolish to make such a decision when I was alive for only a few hours. Sure, I didn't and still don't want to marry Olympians or other gods, they are all absolutely terrible, but the main problem, at least the problem that one side of my mind seemed to care about, was to make teenagers take on such an extreme oath, to spend all eternity as maidens, and serve the Hunt. Was that really the right decision? Was my vision flawed, and could I not see until now? Now the male that made me hate me was the nicest person on the planet.

I ran a few more meters, at this point I could no longer see the lights of the camp, much less demigods. I stopped in a clearing and sat under a tree, tears streaming from my eyes. The full moon illuminated everything, but still left the starry sky in view. The starry sky that tormented me so much, just by the positions of the stars. Three specific constellations made looking at the night sky a challenge for me.

The first was Orion, and the Scorpius. Once a "friend," who to this day I don't know if he really liked me, in a romantic way. I certainly didn't want him, people just thought that because he was the first and almost only man that I accepted into the Hunt. He was exceptionally good at hunting, so good that his own mother, Gaea, ended up killing him to stop the slaughter that he was doing to hundreds of animals. In the end, he became my enemy and was fortunately killed by Reyna during the second Gigantomachy, but seeing the stars aligning in his form stiil is very painful.

The second, the Huntress, Zöe. Zöe's death, first poisoned, and then killed by her father, Atlas, affected me in an immense way. This event made me much more protective of my Hunters, I started to walk closer to them, so that no one could hurt them. Of course, during the war against Gaea, I had to watch, stuck in Delos, as Orion, now serving Gaea, massacred dozens of them. I did not let myself tell anyone how much this affected me. Before we had more than 40 Hunters, today less than half of them are still alive, and now my lieutenant has been mauled and could still die.

The third, the one that caused me the most pain, was Kallisto, the Ursa Major. The poor girl, my best friend, who was abused by my dear father, Zeus. My anger was so great, that when I found out that she was pregnant, I took it out on her. I turned her into a bear, and threatened to kill her if we ever met again. And we did. The story says that she was hunted down and killed, but the truth is that it was we Hunters who killed her when we found her, by accident. After that day I tried to hide my pain, my regret, but I couldn't anymore. As I stared at the Ursa Major in the sky, this pain returned. And I never forgave myself for having betrayed her like that.

- I suppose you have had a realization - a familiar voice suddenly spoke out of nowhere.

- Apollo? - I said, looking in the direction the voice came from.

Right next to me, instead of appearing in his divine form, there Apollo was in his mortal form of Lester Papadopoulos, with his curly black hair, not at all slender body, and face full of acne.

- What are you doing here? - I yelled, still crying profusely.

- I know what you are feeling.

- I'M NOT FEELING ANYTHING! LEAVE ME ALONE! - I shout and try to run away again, but he held me back.

I looked into his now brown eyes, nothing like the divine blue eyes I was so used to seeing in my brother's face.

I collapsed again on the ground and he sat down beside me, giving me a hug.

- Please. - I said sobbing. - What is this?! This... feeling, I can't tell.

He sighed.

- I suppose my time as Lester influenced not only me but you too.

- What?

- You're more human, realizing your flaws, your mistakes.

I could not argue with that. Everything that's happening, I could not understand.

- What do I do? Is this some trick? Is this a god messing with me? I don't understand, I've never felt like that before, ever!

- No, nobody is messing with you. It is simply you realizing that your immortal life doesn't exempt you from your mistakes. I realized this in the most painful way, but you also seem to have realized it, in one way or another. I will not swear that I won't ever put a laurel wreath on my head, because you can't make promises you can't keep or control, but I don't wish to ever wear it that as a symbol of victory for myself. You saw me take them off in Olympus.

I nodded my head.

- And Hyacinth, I just realized that the flowers I made in "honor" of him were nothing more than a ridiculous attempt to make up for my mistake. I imagine that you were thinking about things that happened in the past, correct?

Once again I nodded.

- I was thinking about Zoë, Orion, and Kallisto. How I failed so badly on those three opportunities.

He hugged me tighter.

- I understand what happened. Just so you know, I did not make Orion go crazy. He was always a bastard, you saw what happened in the war. But it's never too late to change. I know you value greatly your oath to be an eternal maiden, not to marry, and that's completely fine. But it's not just love that can be useful.

- What do you suggest? - I ask, puzzled.

Apollo just shrugged his shoulders.

- That, sister, I don't know. But what I can see is that it will be difficult for you to stay in your current godly routine in an effective way. But I know you're smart, little sister, I know you'll manage to go through this - he smiled at me, and I felt better.

We stood together for a few more minutes, without talking. For so long I had looked at Apollo as a problem, not that he wasn't before, that I forgot what it was like to really have a brother. Even if I was older, he felt more like an older brother.

I stood up slowly.

- Where are you going? - he asked.

I looked at him feeling determined. The headache seemed to have passed.

- I think I know what to do. I think I might be going insane, but I don't have any better ideas.

He stood up and gives me one last hug.

- I trust your judgement, Artemis. If you need me, just yell my name. Even at night the sun is still there. - he kissed my forehead.

- Thank you, brother. I love you

He seemed surprised by that, and raised an eyebrow. He then went away in a golden flash, leaving me alone in the forest.

- Desperate measures. - I said to myself.

I walked through the woods back to the camp. It now seemed to be midnight, considering where the moon was, and I felt motivated looking at it, I was the goddess of the moon, and seeing it in all of its glory gave me confidence. I started to run, and felt eyes watching me, nymphs of the trees around me. The cold wind gave me goose bumps, but I didn't mind, it was almost liberating. I began to see lights again, and arrived at the campsite, now all empty, the few campers residing here sleeping. I head towards my cabin, but before I could get there I saw the person I wanted to meet in front of Hades cabin.

- Reyna!

She turned around to see who called her, her eyes looking watery and red.

I hugged her, which seemed to surprise her.

- I am sorry. For what I did earlier.

- It's all right, milady. I understand. It's not really the reason I'm sad.

I look at the cabin behind her.

- Nico? You...

- No! - she exclaimed - It's not like that, please. Let's just change the subject.

- All right, Reyna, I trust you. I need your help.

I then told her the plan that I would put into action tonight, and her eyes widened as she heard it.

- What?

- Just trust me. I need this.

- B-but... what about the hunt?

- I'm not abandoning you all. Just don't tell anyone, not yet. I trust you to lead while I'm gone, and while Thalia is still recovering.

I give her a last hug.

- Good luck. I won't be gone for long, everything will be fine.

With that, I left Reyna alone there, leaving in a silver flash, much like when Apollo left me at the forest.