The firewood is too heavy for me, it keeps falling over. I try hard to stack it. If I don't manage it, father gets angry with me. Just now he doesn't watch me and I try to summon my magic. The logs start to float and pile themselves up right next to the cabin. But I was too loud, Father heard it. He knows what I did. I apologize, but he reaches for the cane to beat me up.
"Nasty little devil, I'll beat the crap out of you!" he yells at me. "Your mother can't protect you now."
The strikes burn and tear my skin apart. He doesn't care that I beg him to stop hurting me. Only in my dreams someone is there to stop him. A strange noblewoman tells me never to apologize for the gift I own. She points out that my magic is not evil, because I can use it to help one close to her. I follow her to another place. That large and beautiful mansion overwhelms me. We enter a room, where a pale sick girl lies in a far too big bed for her tiny body. Somehow I feel deep within what I need to do. The magic flows through my body, I can use it and the little girl opens her eyes. Dark as the night they are.
"I'm Zelena", I introduce myself. "What's your name?"
"Regina," she replies, still weak.
We play together, run around, and imagine we are noble princesses. Her bedroom must be bigger than our whole cabin back home. She doesn't stare at me as if I was a monster, and she doesn't throw stones at me like the village children. It is getting late. Regina asks me to stay with her and I would love nothing more. So I guess this is how it feels like to be no longer alone.
"You and Zelena are sisters", her mother explains to her, ignoring me. Her voice sounds distant and cold as ice.
For one wonderful moment, there is hope that maybe a better life is awaiting me. Just for a moment. Although we plead and beg, the noblewoman sends me away again. Back to the small cabin by the forest and back to my father. It was a beautiful dream.
My only friend is a little black goat. I find her between our two sandy brown goats one morning, when I come to the perch to feed them and get some milk for breakfast. She looks at me with big gentle eyes. I call her Merula. She is the only one, who listens to me and comforts me by nudging me with her soft rosy little nose. I am so lonely that I flee into a fantasy. I am nine.