Their days were like this:
Wake up. Shower. Brush your teeth. Brush your hair. Sneak in 15 minutes for a quiet cup of tea. Watch the sun peak over the San Gabriel Mountains. News interview at 8:00am. Radio appearance at 11:00am. Lunch in the car as you're whisked to the next destination. Check in at the lab (Because, first and foremost, you're a scientist.) Press panel. Dinner with university donors. Finally, around 11:00pm, drag your worn body through the door with whatever energy you have left.
If the gods were on their side, they would find pockets in their schedule for date night, or an afternoon with their friends. Even rarer, were moments to adhere to their coital responsibilities as a couple. But when they did, they were random and with no thought of protection. They weren't trying for a baby, but they certainly weren't preventing it.
Sheldon thrived with their busy schedule. Beyond loving the attention, their days ran like a Chinese rail system. He got a high every time things ran smoothly. Amy, however, had a lesser reaction. She found herself constantly exhausted by the hustle and bustle of it all. The grind literally sickened her. Her worse moment came 6 weeks ago during a podcast appearance.
The studio reeked of old, greasy hamburgers. She wanted to ask the hosts to remove the trash, but she feared sounding like a diva. So, the fast-food bags taunted her nose with every breath she took. She fanned herself and tried to keep a calm composure but her stomach betrayed her. During a question, she opened her mouth to respond- hoping an articulate answer would come stumbling out- instead it was vomit. Clumpy, putrid vomit. For weeks the incident was streamed on iTunes and everywhere you get your podcasts. After that, Amy was forced to bedrest. Perhaps her busy life had finally caught up to her.
At home, she idly scrolled through her phone when a notification caught her attention.
Uh-oh. Late! The app that tracked her period sent her a message reminding her the period that should have come last week never arrived. Amy thought little of it. She was stressed, running non-stop, barely eating, it's no wonder her period was late. Her entire body was in disarray. She figured after things settled, so would her cycle.
However, a nagging thought rummaged in the back of her mind. And every day she went period-less the thought grew. It grew and grew until, somehow, Amy was standing in the family planning aisle of a drug store.
She buried herself into her sweater, wanting to remain inconspicuous. This was Sheldon's favorite pharmacy. She couldn't run the risk of being recognized. So, she grabbed whatever pink box was closest and left.
To her dismay, a labyrinth of shoppers were wrapped around the counter. Amy patted her foot and huffed and moaned but the line didn't budge. The only thing that distracted her was a small, brown bear discarded in the bin beside her.
I'm not going to buy it. She told herself. I'll just tidy its fur. And if she tidied its fur, she might as well adjust its bowtie. And once she adjusted the bowtie, she simply has to admire the embroidered heart on its foot. And after you admire somethings heart embroidered foot, you need to giggle at the crooked smile on its face. But she wasn't going to buy it. Un-uh. She was just going to hold it until she found a better home for it. Turns out that better home was with her. Finally, she checked out- bear on board!
Amy read and re-read the instructions and minutes later: pregnant. Pregnant? She tossed the word around in her mouth and it sounded funny each time. No matter how weird it felt she was, in fact, pregnant.
How would she tell Sheldon? First, she thought about a romantic surprise. Take him out to dinner and have the waiter write "We're pregnant." on the dessert plate. But Sheldon would hate every part of that: Romantic dinner, public surprises, and his food talking to him.
Darth Vader themed? "I am your father". She entertained this idea for a second and quickly came back to reality. There was no way in hell Amy would ruin her first pregnancy announcement with Star Wars. She went through every idea, but was no closer now than she was when she found out.
Suddenly, she heard keys fumbling at the door. Sheldon was home. She grabbed the teddy bear and sat it on the kitchen table with the test in its arms. It stayed in place, for a second, but then slowly fell to its side. Was this the best she could do? A ratty stuffed animal with a pee stick? The Star Wars idea was looking pretty good.
The knob rattled. She propped the bear up and shoved the stick in its lap again.
"Surprise!" She screamed when the door opened.
"AHH!" Sheldon dropped his bag and clutched his chest. "I thought we were being robbed." He said looking around. Everything seemed to be in place, except for his wife who was standing in the middle of the room like a maniac. "Surprise?"
"No. Um- sorry. I'm just…You're home." God she was a terrible liar. And her schvitzing was giving her away. She wanted to blame it on her condition but these were the tell-tale signs of a secret.
"Is everything alright?" He asked.
"I'm just glad you're home."
Sometimes, Amy made Sheldon look normal.
"Well, I'm going to shower. Dr. Mann coughed four times in my office today. Four! It was like he had Covid." He headed to the bedroom, and Amy followed him with excited eyes. "Are you sure you're alright?" She nodded feverishly. "Cause you're acting weird."
"I'm sorry" She regained a bit of her composure. "I'm being silly. Come sit, I have a surprise for you."
"So, there is a surprise?"
She led him to the table and stretched her arms toward the bear.
"Ta-da!"
She twiddled her fingers trying to give a little razzle dazzle to her lackluster surprise.
"A teddy bear?" He asked.
"Yes, but what is the teddy bear holding?"
"Looks like a test of some sort. Dear Lord, is it Covid? Is the surprise that you have Covid? Great, a shower isn't nearly enough."
"It's not a Covid test, Sheldon. It's a pregnancy test."
"Why do you have a pregnancy test?"
"Because I'm-I'm…surprise!" A weighty silence.
"You're pregnant?"
She nodded.
"You're pregnant."
"Yes."
"YOU'RE PREGNANT!" He pulled Amy into a massive hug and swung her from side to side. "This is a little ahead of schedule, but it's only fitting our progeny is already ahead of the curve. Starting tomorrow we're babying everything; pre-natal vitamins, baby books, baby…Gaaah!" He grabbed her again and held her face in his hands. "You are incubating the next great scientific mind, Amy. How wonderful is that?" He placed a kiss to her forehead.
"Don't get too excited. It's only a drug store test. We should schedule a doctor's appointment to make it official."
"Of course, of course." He tried to quell his excitement but was failing miserably.
"Okay, we can celebrate a little!" Amy said releasing him from his misery.
"Yip-ee!" He grabbed her hand and raced toward the door.
"Where are we going?" Amy said giggling behind him.
"Out! MY WIFE IS GOING TO HAVE A—"
"Sheldon!" Amy pointed to apartment 4a.
"My wife is going to have a baby." He whispered as he silently celebrated down the steps.
After a night of stuffing their bellies with Amy's favorite Mexican food, they laid in bed wrapped in each other's arms. His hand rested on her stomach and her hand atop of his. Any promises of not getting too excited had been soon forgotten.
"I hope the baby has your height" Amy started.
"I hope the baby has your nose."
"I hope the baby has your dark hair." She tugged on his hair gently.
"Of course, they'll have dark hair."
"Not necessarily. Every fourth cousin on my mom's side has red hair. He could be the redhead of the family."
"He?" Sheldon said noticing her verbal hiccup.
She shrugged, "Just trying it on for size."
"A boy." He dreamed. "I wouldn't mind a mini me."
She looked into his boyish face, already tracing out the features of their son. "I wouldn't mind that at all."
The pair, dreamed of the life they were about to start with their new child. They would trade in press conferences with birthing classes. TV appearances for Cocomelon. Quick meals in the car for- well that might stay the same.
Doctors Appointment
The day went like this:
Wake up. Shower. Brush your hair. Brush your teeth. Sneak in 15 minutes for a quiet cup of tea. Watch the sun peak over the San Gabriel Mountains. Wonder if the baby will be outdoorsy. Drive to the doctor's office. Check in. Admire the bellies on the other mothers-to-be. Imagine how big your belly will get. Get called to the back. Get weighed. Get measured. Answer all of the nurse's questions. Lift your shirt. Don't react to how cold the gel is. Watch as she runs the devise over your abdomen. Watch as she does this again. And again. Don't panic when she pages the doctor to observe. Check the screen for yourself. Mother knows best. Nothing. No noise. No heartbeat. No baby.
Everything seemed hazy, like she was walking through a fog or slushing through her empty womb.
Empty womb. That's how she felt. Like there was a massive gaping hole in the middle of her stomach. Like everyone could see straight through her; straight to her broken heart, weary soul, and dark thoughts. She tried to cover it with her hands, but what was she protecting? Nothing was there.
When they got home, Amy stopped at the door. What now? Does she lay in bed and wallow for weeks? Continue about her day as if nothing happened? She had only known for two weeks; did she even deserve to feel this upset.
I guess I'll clean. She washed the dishes. Wiped the stove. Now what? Vacuumed the carpet. Swept the floor. Now what? Organize the coffee table—stop. She saw the baby book she was thumbing through this morning and other parent magazines on the table. She turned away. The pre-natal vitamins were on the counter. Turn again. Teddy was propped in the crux of the couch. She snatched each item and lifted the lid to the trash.
"What are you doing?" Sheldon finally said. They hadn't spoken since they got back. The silence was doing enough talking.
"They're useless. We don't need them anymore."
"But we might…In the future."
"I don't want the future, Sheldon. I want this one." She grabbed at her stomach. Sheldon's throat twisted watching her do this. He grieved for his wife who grieved for their child.
"I could see him, clear as day: laughing, running, playing. He was so beautiful, Sheldon. He was ours."
He is ours. He thought. But nothing Sheldon thought of felt like it came close to comforting Amy.
"Tell me."
Amy looked at him questioningly.
"What did he look like?"
It took her a while but she slowly closed her eyes, sinking into her daydream.
"For starters, he was tall, and skinny, and pale. Like his daddy. He had glasses, like me. Biologist for sure. And a little Texas twang."
Sheldon grabbed her hands and closed his eyes as well.
"He loved literature. Played the harp. And he's a physicist, like me."
"He adored Star Wars and all that other sci-fi nonsense."
"He loved his mother."
"He loved his father."
They slowly opened their eyes. Amy had a soft smile on her face, holding on to that wonderful daydream.
"Let's put all of the baby stuff away for now, until we're ready to try again. Okay?" Sheldon said. He grabbed the items they'd accumulated throughout the week and put them in a box. He grabbed the teddy bear and started to place it in.
"Leave it." Amy said. "Put it by the bed, so he won't be alone tonight." They rested the bear on Amy's nightstand.
"We never got around to naming him." Amy said straightening his bowtie.
"Theodore. But we'll call him Teddy."
"Goodnight, Teddy Cooper. We so wanted to meet you."