September 20th, 1974
Last summer, aside from my weight still being too low, my checkup went well. For the most part, I managed to stay out of my dad's way when he was drunk, and even when he did beat me, my head didn't get hit, so my brain looked a lot better than it did last year. Lucius says he thinks it's good I was able to spend Christmas with him and Easter at school, then just stay away from my dad as much as possible over the summer. What Lucius doesn't seem to understand is that I'm not always in control. If my dad is drinking whiskey on the couch at two in the morning, how am I supposed to "stay away from him?" I have to sleep somewhere, and if he decides he's mad at me for some reason or another, then he knows where to find me, and I can't stay at Lily's all summer! They go to see their grandparents, and they go on holiday sometimes! Anyways, I'll be going to the manor for Christmas. Lucius said I might be able to come to the manor for Easter, though, but that he'd have to check his schedule. I'm secretly hoping that I can stay at school again over Easter, or go to Evan's house this year, but at the time, I didn't want to seem ungrateful or make Lucius mad, so I didn't say anything.
After classes are over on Mondays, Evan and Joseph have Quidditch practice, Clarence has Chess Club, and John likes to go to the library, so Lily and I can hang out by the lake. We like to dip our feet in the water when it's warm outside and throw bread to the giant squid. We've decided that its name is Samantha, and that we're going to start telling the first years that if you don't feed Samantha every day, it starts dragging students in.
One day, while throwing bread to Samantha, Lily asks me, "Sev? Do you have a crush on anybody?"
I take a minute to think. The image of Evan laughing by the fire pops into my head, but I clear my mind and try to think of the girls in my classes. Unmoved, I shake my head, "No, what about you?"
Lily quickly glances over at me, then looks back at the lake, "Yeah, I do."
Interest peaked, I nudge her shoulder, and say, "So? Who is it?"
She pauses for a second, then says, "I think I like Johnson– you know, Eric Johnson? He's one of the Ravenclaw chasers."
"Really? Him? He's not even that good-looking, Lily!" I laugh.
"He held the door for me yesterday, and he always smiles at me during class! What's so funny about that?" she exclaims, and pushes me gently.
"Anybody would hold the door for a girl, that's nothing special, and besides, he's always got pimples!"
"Everybody has pimples except you— we're 14, Sev! It's normal! Even Petunia had pimples when she was 14, and you know how she is!"
"Well, I'm happy I don't have any pimples," I say, gleefully recalling Petunia crying about her pimples last summer.
"Well, Mr. Snape, we can't all be perfect like you!" Lily laughs, and throws a piece of bread at my head. She misses, and I pick it up and throw it back at her.
Using my best Lucius-impersonation, I straighten my tie, and say pretentiously, "Poor Lily, it's a shame you're just not as gorgeous as me. Don't worry, though, I'll still let you hang out with me!"
"Okay, listen you silly goose, when you start getting pimples, I'm going to have no sympathy for you! But really, his pimples aren't that bad! I think he's cute! His eyes are so pretty, too!" she says, blushing lightly.
I look at her with interest. Why is she having this discussion with me? "I dunno, I've never really spent any time with him to notice. Did he ask you out or something?"
"No, but I hope he does!" Oh, she must be asking for advice! I'm not sure why she would want advice from me, though. Maybe because I'm a boy and Johnson is a boy?
Thinking hard, I reply, "I know we're supposed to do a project in charms next, right? Why don't you ask if he wants to be your partner for that or something?"
Lily shakes her head, and exclaims, "I'm a girl! He has to ask me!"
"That's dumb, but okay. Talk to him next time you see him and tell him you heard you're going to be doing a project and see if he asks you to be his partner. Maybe hint that you're not sure who you wanna work with this time? Play with your hair a little or something, he'll figure it out," I shrug my shoulders, "And make sure to smile and laugh at his jokes! That's what my mum does with the men at the tavern when she wants tips!"
"That's a good idea! Should I wear any makeup, or do you think I already look fine?"
I feel like that's a very loaded question, but if she's asking, then she must really want to know, I suppose, "Well, my mum always wears makeup to the tavern, so you might as well, right? Your eyes are real pretty, so maybe some of that black stuff for your eyelashes? And something to cover the pimple on your chin maybe?"
"Is it that bad?" she mumbles, touching her chin.
"I don't think so, but it couldn't hurt, right? I mean, you asked! And don't touch it, Narcissa says if you touch them, you'll make them worse. She has a cream or something that she uses to make them go away."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. I'll buy some concealer and some of the cream next time we go to Hogsmeade! Wanna come with me? You can show me what Narcissa uses!"
"If you want me to, but I'd rather go to the Three Broomsticks with my other friends I think. I don't really care about that stuff, and I'm sure you can find something like what she uses real easy! And anyways, if people saw me there with you they'd think I was, you know, into that kinda stuff, and I don't want people spreading rumors. We could meet up after that, though! Why don't you invite Marlene? Doesn't she like makeup?"
"Good idea! Your hair's getting long again– can I braid it?"
My mind flips back to a couple summers ago when Lily's mum taught her how to braid. Ever since, Lily has always wanted to braid my hair. I always let her. It feels good, and I know she enjoys it, "Sure, I guess. You gotta take it out when you're done, though. It'll look silly if you leave it in, and I'll get made fun of!"
"Okay! I'm gonna give yooouuuu… two french braids!" Lily says cheerfully, "Do you have a brush with you, or should I use mine?"
"I don't carry my comb with me– you can use yours. You want me to quiz you for Herbology while you do my hair?"
"Yeah! It's always easier for me to study when I can move my hands at the same time, you know? You have such silky hair, Sev! I wish my hair was silky like yours!"
"What are you talking about? Your hair is super pretty! I like that yours is wavy. Mine always looks stringy 'cause it's straight!" I don't know why she would want her hair to be like mine, her hair is already gorgeous!
"No! You just never brush yours so it gets tangled, you silly goose! Mine always gets frizzy in potions and in the summer. I've only seen yours get frizzy a couple of times, and only when it needs trimmed!" she brushes my hair gently and starts sectioning it out.
"Yeah, 'cause it's straight already! But at least yours never looks stringy or greasy or thin! I wish my hair was like yours!"
Lily laughs, and says, "I guess we both want what we can't have. Well, quiz me! Then you can do my hair and I can quiz you!"
"I'm not good at braids or anything…"
"I can teach you! It's super easy!"
"If you say so!" I laugh, and open my Herbology book.
