Malachi's POV
"..Let him out. Arrange an audience with him. It doesn't matter whether it's private or not. Just- Give him an opportunity to tell you the truth. That's all I ask." I stared down at my knees, refusing to look at Nobunaga. "Malachi.." I could hear the surprise in Hideyoshi's quiet voice. "I will not." 'This.. This is why I fucking hate you and your goddamned tyranny. You refuse to listen to anyone!'
Finally, I met Nobunaga's harsh and cold gaze, intensity burning in my own. "Do you actually have any reason to believe Mitsuhide would betray you? Don't you hold any trust for him?!" Nobunaga's eyes narrowed, "There is only one thing I trust about Mitsuhide.. And that is that the moment he turns against me is the moment I have strayed from my path." What does that even mean? Nobunaga turned his head, "We are done discussing this." Though unsatisfied, I left. Hideyoshi following.
Once we were out of the audience hall, I turned my attention to Hideyoshi. "Hideyoshi, what's your take on what Nobunaga just said?" "It might be hard to tell, but our lord has a lot of trust in Mitsuhide. He always has." "..How long have they been together?" "A long time. And they've been through a lot. Nobunaga once took to the vanguard personally to come to Mitsuhide's rescue." Hideyoshi explained, "Do you know what makes this even worse? They were fighting Kennyo at the time. Now here we are.."
I had heard he'd fought Kennyo, but I hadn't known that much to that extent. For all that we'd studied recent history together, Mitsuhide had glossed over any parts he had taken part in. Hideyoshi narrowed his gaze, "Lord Nobunaga's always let that idiot do as he pleases because he puts that much faith in him. But Mitsuhide refuses to admit where his loyalties lie and keeps his thoughts to himself. I wish.. I wish he'd open up." I felt a small pang in my chest. "If only I knew what was in his heart." Hideyoshi finished. I nodded, it was a feeling I knew all too well.
It had been a week since I'd last seen my room. But rather than unpacking, I sat on the floor, completely dazed. I don't know what's in Mitsuhide's heart either. I'm not sure I ever did. But all the same.. I recalled the tears that had blurred my vision that horrid night. And how lovingly Mitsuhide had brushed each one away. I could recall how tightly he embraced me as we made our daring escape from the festival. Our last night together.
Had it all been fake? ..It doesn't matter now. Not that it would've ever mattered. All I could control was how I felt about him and this fucked situation. And- I admit it now. I've been in love with him for a long time. I just kept fighting it. In all fairness, he teased me a lot- and I loved that too.. Something in my heart was telling me desperately that I had to see him again. But knowing him, he'll pretend not to care and tell me to leave. He definitely won't let anything slip. But that doesn't matter. I'm not after answers. I just.. I just love him. And I want to cherish these last two months before I have to say goodbye forever..
