- Chapter 15 -
It was odd to feel the cloth lengthening beneath his fingers to perfectly fit his head and neck as Tony pulled the mask on over his head. While he'd already learned the Enchantment of Sizes, he'd never used it on anything he was wearing at the time. The cloth was light and incredibly soft to the touch. It also felt wrong somehow. A small touch of fear quickened his breath.
There was still some light coming through the cloth as he did up the first latch.
The light dimmed to a dusky grey and the only sound he could hear was the increasing beat of his own heart as the second latch locked in place.
There was a strange tingling in his skin, as though dozens of ghostly hands were running their fingers softly along his body. A strange smell pervaded his nose and his tongue felt slightly swollen as he grasped the final latch. I can do this, he told himself. Tony braced himself for the dark as he did up the last latch. He wasn't prepared for the world to drop away beneath him.
Into the vast nothingness Tony fell. He opened his mouth to scream but no sound came out. Tony tried to move his body; it wouldn't respond. He tried again and realized too late that the nothingness had already taken his body. IT'S EATING ME! It consumed him whole before he could even react. That's why I can't hear myself scream; it's eaten my voice. Oh god! Oh god, Loki help me! He didn't think Loki could hear him. He was floating through the darkness, lost in the vastness. It was the same vastness the Chitauri came out of. The blackness was pulling him inexorably inward until he was utterly lost in it. Tony was drifting farther and farther from where he started. Fear built itself up in his mind until it constructed terror. The darkness was endless around him. It pulled him even further into it. The complete terror overrode his thoughts as it built itself up into panic. As the very last piece of raw terror slipped into place, and encompassing panic smothered his mind, the darkness drew him ever deeper. Time dilated around him while his mind dissolved into a nameless dread to abstract to express. As the darkness had eaten his body, so it ate the last of his rational thoughts.
Darkness that was blacker than black surrounded him, shoving his panic to the side, sheltering Tony as it went. A dark voice came from nowhere, "This was a bad idea. You ought not do this again without me." The overwhelming nature of the voice left Tony both sheltering further into and squirming away from the voice.
An incandescently brilliant light suddenly flooded out of the darkness to burn his eyes behind his eyelids. I will …be waiting …for you …, whispered through his thoughts before the dark voice faded. As he had drowned in darkness so now he was drowning in light. There was a din assaulting his ears like thousands of animals roaring together. The ghostly hands that had so softly caressed him began violently disassembling and reassembling his body in turns. The fiery agony of it ripped through him in staggering waves. There was blood in his mouth, the thick taste of it was overwhelmingly metallic. I'm in hell, I'm in hell ... It was all he could do to hold onto that one thought. Just as Tony thought he couldn't possibly endure anymore a faint aroma drifted over to his nose. It was so faint that he thought he might lose it at any moment. Loki! It was her scent. He would know the airy scent of lavender and spice anywhere. It was wild and gentle at the same time. Loki! Loki is near! Where are you?
The light's burn faded as the light faded from a sharp silver to a soothing green. The roaring died away until all that was left was the beating of his heart. My heart? No, Loki's heart. There was a smaller rat-a-tat-tat beat under the sound of Loki's heart. A warm wash of masculine love flowed from it. Her scent was stronger. The taste of blood washed away leaving a clean fresh taste in its wake. The agony of finding his body dulled until all Tony could feel were cold steel bands wrapped tight around him. The sensations dissolved into disorientation when his mind reset itself.
Eventually Tony recognized the ceiling of the gym. He couldn't remember why he was looking up at the ceiling. He was laying both on the floor and in Loki's lap. His head was resting against her chest and her arms we're wrapped tight around him.
"Tony, I'm here, I'm here. Come back to me, I'm here, come back," Loki was whispering. His seidr was still whispering, fear, awaiting, blackness. It hurt Loki to hear. Weirdly, a picture of the silver slid of the nimp flowed out through his seidr for a moment before it was replaced with disorientation and confusion.
"Loki? What happened?" Tony was confused. He couldn't think of what might have happened to leave him lying on the floor.
"I'm so sorry, Love. I should never have let it happen. I'm sorry," Loki apologized.
Sorry? Why is she sorry? What happened? Tony turned his head to the side and saw the mask lying discarded on the floor. The mask? The void! Tony tore out of Loki's grasp and scrambled away from the mask as quickly as he could go. He stopped when his back hit the wall. The harsh sound of his ragged breathing filled his ears followed shortly by the rushing of blood and the pounding of his heart.
.-.-.-.
The fear in Anthony's eyes caused Frey to frown. It was an unpleasant sight.
"Sir, what did that thing just do to Tony?" Bruce had turned to ask Queen Frigga. He decided to ask King Frey instead when her husband gave him a very pointed glare.
He assessed the mortal quickly and didn't feel that answering him would do any harm. "It robs the wearer of their body, locking them inside of their own mind," Frey replied quietly.
"No mortal was ever meant to use it," Frigga said softly. Stark's reaction wasn't surprising. Mortal men were always reaching for what they couldn't comprehend.
"Anthony is no mere mortal, sweetling," Frey reminded her.
That can't be true. Odin still didn't want to believe that Stark was anything but mortal. The alternative was truly terrible. Mortal or no, this did prove that Stark was a fool, reaching for things he couldn't hope to understand, let alone use. Power didn't convey intelligence or capability. Odin wasn't willing to believe that Stark had any of the three of those just yet.
"What do you mean by that? Is it because Stark has access to Loki's magic?" Director Fury asked him.
"It's not my place to say. Perhaps you'll be shown, or perhaps not. Listen and learn," Frey's cryptic answer didn't look like it satisfied the mortal, but it was all he was going to get.
.-.-.-.
"That's not a training tool, Loki. That thing is a torture device!" Tony yelled. He knew those devices very well and was certain of his declaration. The old monsters would love that. His chest was still heaving, and nausea started brewing in his gut. Loki kneeled quickly in front of him. She took his face in her hands and turned it away from the mask towards her. When he wouldn't quite tear his gaze from the mask, she moved to straddle his lap and pulled him forward to her. Tony rested his head against her chest and wrapped his arms around her middle. Loki held him gently with one hand resting on his shoulder and the other slowly stroking through his short hair.
Loki's seidr responded to his distress. Tony could feel her seidr flowing outward from her core. It washed over him in cooling waves. His own seidr answered before he had time to think. It flared out like fire from his skin. Their seidrs filled the air with little silver sparks before a single golden radiance gleaming with the little sparks surrounded them. The glow faded as his frenzied heart calmed. He breathed in deeply her scent as though it were the breath of life. When he exhaled, he was calm again.
When Tony pulled back it was enough to be able to see Loki's face. He didn't let go of her, he kept her straddling his lap. Her weight on him was soothing. "I'm sorry, Loki. That was my fault, not yours. I didn't understand."
"I should never have let you have it." Loki frowned then.
"Loki, you can't blame yourself for my stubbornness. I won't let you," Tony rested his head on her chest again. The sweet sound of her beating heart put him further at ease. "I could feel him," Tony murmured.
"Him? You think so?" Loki continued to stroke her hand lazily through his hair.
"Yeah. We're going to have another son," he smiled against her and was sure she could feel it, "That will make eight boys." When she only hummed in response, he nuzzled her neck. "I can't wait to meet him," he planted a small kiss on her neck, "I'm so excited to see him, to hold my boy," he left another kiss just under her ear, "I wonder what he'll be like."
.-.-.-.
Painful anger set Pepper's thoughts adrift. She looked down at her hands for a moment before they clenched into fists. She refused to cry. Crying felt like defeat. Her dreams of a life with Tony may have been gone, but she still had her dignity.
I'll have another grandson. Frey smiled widely. It pleased immensely him to know. He hadn't been able to tell when last he saw Loki. The babe looked as normal as it could for being Anthony and Loki's child. They had strange anatomy, his grandchildren. Everything was healthy, so he tried not to worry overly much about it. Frey's mind wandered for a moment. He wondered if this newest boy would like stories and songs like the other ones. It would be a few more years, but he already wanted to have a new little set of armor made for his newest grandson, as he had for all the rest of his grandsons. He had fine little dresses and soft dolls made for his granddaughters. He ruthlessly shoved down the pleasure and anticipation he felt at the thought of another grandchild to spend time with. Frey had no doubt that it would hurt his beloved sister were she to hear them. Her seidr was still hissing, Betrayer, at him. He also wasn't going to expose the hurt that caused him.
.-.-.-.
"You'll have to wait and see. It'll be another five months at least before you'll know," Loki spoke quietly. And if I'm still by your side, then the ninth boy shall be named Freyr. Tony was calm again and holding her, she couldn't be upset with that. She thought that she shouldn't let Tony have the mask again, and immediately laughed at herself. Who am I fooling? I'll give in to Tony's desires, I always do.
A smile touched his face. Tony could feel Loki's quiet laugh; the gentle shaking of her shoulders pressed her breasts closer to his face. As much as he wanted to strip her bare and bury himself in the tight heat of her body right then and there, a different desire was growing in his mind. Tony made certain of what he wanted to say before he spoke, "I want to train with it. If you'll train me."
"Tony, you know what it is now, what it does. Do you truly want to do that to yourself again?" Loki sat back on his lap and looked down at him.
I have children, it's too late to be a coward. Tony rested a hand on her hip, his other gently stroked over her lower belly. His gaze followed his hand. My son, I can't wait to meet you. I'll be a good father to you, not a cowardly one. He looked up to meet her gaze, "Yes. You use it to make yourself better. Better in fighting, and probably better in magic. I want that too."
I don't have the time left to finish that kind of training, she thought. Loki looked back at the mask. But he wants it. She knew well how to use the Masquerade of Shadows, but teaching was a different thing from using. She wasn't concerned about her ability to teach, only the time she had to devote to such training. Loki was most concerned with Tony trying to learn this. The possibility that his nightmares would worsen was a real and worrisome concern. She didn't want to leave him with more nightmares. She wanted to leave him with as much of herself as possible before he could no longer have her. Loki smiled as she thought it again. He wants it. She was caving to his desires, as she always did. Perhaps, if I offered him the same that was offered to me then...
"Loki?" Tony was still looking up at her.
Reluctantly Loki removed herself from Tony's arms. She wasn't sure about the wisdom of this, but it was what Tony wanted. She walked over and picked up the mask. When she turned back to him there was a distant look on her face. "I'll make you the same offer that was made to me."
"Ok, that's fair," Tony was listening.
"If you can keep the mask on for an entire minute, then I'll train you in its use," Loki was still uneasy about the wisdom of this.
Funny, but that can't be real. Tony laughed and looked at her, waiting for the actual offer. When it didn't come, he looked at her differently. She was serious. He stood up to walk over to her. "Loki, babe, you can't be serious. I had it on for a lot longer than a minute." An upset look crossed her face as he spoke. He didn't understand, "What's wrong?"
"Love, you only had the mask on for a few seconds," Loki wasn't comfortable telling him.
.-.-.-.
One minute? That's it?! I will have her train me with this, Frey was certain of it. Frigga and Odin both sat in their disbelief that so powerful an artifact had such a paltry barrier to training. With a swift glance at one another they knew that each was going to have this training. Frigga even smiled as she thought that the time would give her a chance to speak with her child as he instructed her. It was something Odin was going to have to discuss with Loki after he was returned to Asgard for trial. Honestly, he was even more surprised by Stark's desire to be trained. It wasn't courage, just more foolishness. Stark hadn't lasted but a few seconds, there was no way that he was going to make it for a full minute. All three monarchs held the certainty that the training might be difficult, but well worth it. Frey had no doubt that such a powerful artifact would push him to his limits. He hoped it might push him right past them.
