(Based on Rogue Trader CYOA)

Name's Henry Walter. Life was shit, that was for sure. It was okay before COVID, but that damn Chinese virus made everything shit. Everyone's pissed off, idiots run the company and government, and Russia's about to put the world out of its misery. Me, I used to be an oil platform worker. Now most of those are gone, and we rely on the Saudis for gas. I've been unable to find a decent job since, so all I'm doing now is burning off my savings and hoping to wait out the nightmare. So why do some stuff? A quick check on Reddit in r/makeyourownchoice sub, one of the last decent ones, and I found a new one.

Rogue Trader CYOA- 100

Standard Warrant- 10

Dauntless Class-20

Cobra Raider- 5

Volunteer Crew- 0

Naval Veterans -5

2 Macrocannon Batteries- 10

Lance Batteries-6

Light Macrocannon- 1

Heavy Void Shield- 5

Fitted Crew Quarters- 2

Warp Shield- 5

Guardsmen Regiment- 1

Palace-Fortress- 1

Manufactorum- 8

Cloning Vat- 5

Ministorum Temple- 5

Juvenent Gland- 5

Combat Augmentation- 1

Cognition Implant- 3

Gene Sculpting- 1

Battle Harem- 1

Boon- Eldar

I had to say it was a nice one, had to parchment graphics and everything. Not to mention, the setup was extremely simple and easy to follow. Probably should not have to spent so many resources on one ship, but whatever.It's just a CYOA. That thought was the last thing in my mind before everything went dark.


My head was killing me, probably a hangover. I put my hand against my head... and did not expect to feel long hair with a slight metallic plate underneath. My eyes shot open and I shot up, before I looked around to see an extremely ornate bedroom. I looked down to see I was sitting on a blood red bed with... what appeared solid gold frame and red silk covers around it. The whole room was crazily decorated with gilded furniture, paintings, and even the smallest objects seemed to cost more than I'd earn in a decade. Based on the cost of gold and the mass of the bed frame, the bed frame alone would cost around 21,328,800.

Wait, how did I know that? And how did I calculate such an outcome? Perhaps this strange device in my head gives me a massive calculation boost. I bet I could beat that Jewel Baxter girl in second grade. It seems my memory is also enhanced. I also feel much lighter and energized. I look into a nearby vanity mirror, and holy shit... I look good. All the fat and other unwanted additions were replaced with lean muscle and flawless skin. My hair was a silky black, and my face a tiny bit sharper with crystal blue eyes. I seemed to be in some sort a red bed robe... with an imperial Aquila on the shoulders. At that moment, my enhanced mind understood the implications, the CYOA was not just a CYOA. However, I needed to further confirm this.

I immediately lunged out of bed, not used to my new weight and speed, and surprisingly caught myself from a fall. It would take time to get used to the upgrade. It was like going from an Toyota to a super car. My original body was heavy and slow to respond compared to my new one. Fortunately, I was seemed to remaster my movements easily.

"Ah, you're awake my lord." I heard a graceful feminine voice behind me. I turned to see what would essentially be a real life version of Esdeath. She was even wearing her typical uniform, with a few imperium regalia here and there. I can't help but wonder just how much she carried from her anime counterpart. I doubt she still had her ice powers, the imperium doesn't really have the technology outside forge worlds, and I'm not sure they're going to create psykers.

"Yes, I rested well. Though it took time adjust to my... upgrade." My own voice was very smooth, not exceptionally deep. If anything, it was on the lighter side. It also seems I have an understanding of high and low gothic already. On another note, I seemed to be much taller. Esdeath, in the anime, was 5 foot seven, which was about an inch shorter than me. I now was nearly a whole head over her.

"I understand my lord. Would you like for me to dress you?" She was about submissive of CYOA said. The normal character would be quite commanding.

"That would nice, but describe your abilities and skills for me." I ordered, though rather softly. While a woman tailored to my will sounds fun, I'm going to treat her like a real subordinate.

"As you wish. I was created to fit your specifications by the Adeptus Mechanicus. You desired for me to fit well as a general and commander, so I was given all known knowledge of military tactics and proper use of most imperium weapons. I apologize for not being able to use cryomancy, but my creators do not liking creating psykers." She stated with a sad expression, feeling ashamed for a problem beyond her control. To be honest, the warp is way too much trouble anyway.

"Do not be upset. To be honest, I'm surprised asking for that was not heresy." I was genuinely surprised about that. Asking for a sorceress should be outright illegal, especially with the fanatical fear of the warp.

"Thank you for being displeased my lord. You're far too kind." Man, I know this isn't wrong in the 42nd millennium, but it's still upsetting to me.

"Please prepare my outfit, and call all command staff to the bridge." It's time to get a full understanding of this situation. I hope my little miscalculation of investing all my stuff in one ship won't blow up in my face. A single cobra raider with single set of light Macrocannons? That as might well be a fishing boat nowadays. And the crew are just green horns from a hive world. Hopefully the command staff has the junction to

"As you wish my lord." She immediately walked off with a wonderful grace to her step. I couldn't help but ogle at her wonderful thighs. I didn't have much luck with women. Hopefully, this goes a little better in this time.


I was now dressed in ornate red robes with a Aquila on the back. The robes were rather sparse compared to most rogue traders, but was in fact quite well made. The "silk" was actually an expensive nanoweave strong enough to stop several lasgun shots, and the weave also a lesser form of shielding built in. The shoes were apparently made from some exotic animal off Catachan, which probably was a death machine. Because of this, they're resistant to virtually anything short of outright being hit by a Bolter or warp energy. Not to mention, the whole outfit was awesome, aesthetically and comfortably. Overall, I was now read to meet my command staff.

"My lord, all of your commanders are waiting for you." Esdeath was quite eager to see me visit our bridge. I can't help but wonder how many different people are there. Based on the lore, the most important individuals would be: navigator, the senior tech priest, the ecclesiastical official, and the Lord-General in charge of the guardsmen, and overseer of the crew.

"Good, could you list them out for me?" I did not want to embarrass myself on the first meeting. Some of these people have literally seen hell itself. Not to mention some could really do damage if they didn't like me.

"Of course, first is your tech priest, Magos Erium-Rho-0, Navigator Uramus Praxo, Lord Colonel Perha Verrids, Arch Confessor Gabriel Michaelia, Head of Palace Staff Sebas Pervidus, and Overseer Virgo Schnee." Most of them sounded fairly normal, but the last bit was more than a little surprising. I can't help but wonder if someone found a fragment of RWBY and named themselves after it.

"Thank you Esdeath." I was truly grateful to have her around. I doubt she's going to be as much a lover as much as a administrative assistant. I was going in blind, and she at least handed me a walking stick to poke my way there.

"Anything for you my lord." She seemed to shutter with pleasure from the compliment. Just how devoted was she. Something told me I'd be pretty terrified if I knew. Slowly we walked through the long marble floored halls, which apparently came from a now lost mining world. The halls were all expensive wood and golden gilding, with the occasional expensive painting and decorative table.

It was definitely something to look at, the fortress-palace was a worthy investment should I ever need to bring any form royalty aboard. Except for the emperor of course, even if he was healthy, he'd want it invested somewhere else. Soon, we left the ornate scene out of a large heavily gilded door coated in more precious metals into a less ornate stairway. Now it was more of one would expect of a real ship. There was thin, red carpet across solid metal stairs. The walls were now made of metal and were lit by stark ceiling lights. There were occasional indent with a small sculpture or fountain. After a short walk, we reached the top of the stairs where they split two ways that went into another ornate scene.

Judging by the plentiful amount of pews and a long crimson carpet leading to a podium with a massive statue of the emperor behind it, this was the ministorum temple. On the walls were statues of the loyalist primarches and vast assemblies of stained glass depicting various historical events. The place was ornate as my palace, but I didn't really complain. This place would serve well to keep everyone's spirits up, and the heresy down. Besides, I felt a sense of comfort here, perhaps because my grandfather was a preacher. Soon we took a quick turn to see another staircase going up between the other two. After going up this one, we finally reached a large set of doors that seemed to be able to seal, and opened them.

After what felt like years, we were on the bridge. Seriously, we need to add a tram or elevator. The bridge was everything you'd imagine. The main path way split into two separate stairways, each with a red carpet with solid stone railings with a multitude of skulls and imperial symbols. The floor had two rows of monitor/intercom set ups. In the center was the typical planetary hologram projector. On the right side of the room was another depicting the ship, and the cobra raider next door. The front wall was a large screen with data feeds from various cameras around the exterior of the ship. And don't forget the red carpet, skulls, and aquilas. In the center of the room, was what I assumed to be my inner circle.

The first was Arch-Confessor Gabriel Michaelia , and was surprisingly a woman with blood red hair and green eyes. I wasn't sure if the imperium allowed women that high up in the church. She was in a ornate white robe and hat covered in aquilas, scripture, and a very well used holy book. She also held a staff with a torch on the top.

The second was the easiest to recognize. Dawning the red robes of the machine god, the cyborg that was Magos Erium-Rho-0 could best be described as a sapient T-60 power armor with at least five different tools coming from his back, occupied by a few mendrites coming from his shoulders. Under the hood, his T-60 helmet eyes glowed a verdant green.

The next, and most futuristic of the bunch, was the Lord-Colonel Perha Verrids. He wore what appeared to be a hazmat suit, but was a dark grey and was very compact. My assumptions as to the nature of the unit is an anti ork or biohazard regiment.

The second to last was probably the most important to the vessel. Uramus Praxo was actually fairly normal in appearance besides the third eye. He was dawned on ornate robes, ones a little more leaden than mine. Something about him was a little more than slightly unnerving though. It may have to do with his extra ocular.

I couldn't believe I didn't catch it earlier. Sure enough, Sebas Pervidus was the butler from Overlord. With eyes steely enough make a commissar blink, he appeared to be an older man in his early sixties. His suit was perfectly well cleaned, without a single flaw.

The last didn't look she belonged on an imperial ship. Virgo Schnee wore a seductive black dress and had a black whip on her. She even had the eyes and hair of the Schnee family. I couldn't help but notice the confessor glaring at her. I'm probably going to have a feud to deal with. I do hope that Virgo doesn't pose a chaos risk. Eccentricities can be extremely dangerous in this time, the whip being a strong pointer to Slaanesh.

"Announcing Lord-Captain Henry Walter's entry." Esdeath beamed with pride in her voice. She loved her job at least, even if she was programmed to. I still feel a bit guilty about that.

"I am Magos Erium-Rho-0, a child of the Omnissiah. I will accompanying your vessels to search for sacred STC fragments. He stuck out his mechanical arm, and I gave it a good shake.

"It is reassuring to know we have one properly enlightened on the treatment of our machines on board." I'm not lying about that. The last thing I need is some fool to blow up the warp drive. I'd take a religious fanatic with an understanding of maintenance over a less fanatic fool who can't change a tire.

"I am Arch-confessor Gabriel Michaelia. I'm honored for the opportunity to spread and nurture his holiness's light among our crew and all members of man. I give you my word not a single person in this fleet will threaten our faith." She then offered a deep bow, and practically radiated faith. Ho boy, what have brought onto this ship?

"I take it the temple was sufficient?" I hope so, it already dwarfed any church I visited. The room rivaled most cathedrals.

"Absolutely Captain, you're the first to give me a proper shrine." I can imagine why, that took a lot of space.

"That's good to hear." As much as I dislike fanatic religious faith, I will not deny that it has shown actual tangible effects in the 42nd millennium.

"My name is Perha Verrids. I'm the regimental commander of the 34th regiment of the Valkerian Cleansers." I haven't heard of that regiment.

"Have your men taken their new quarters well?" I'm not sure if the upgraded quarters extended to the guardsmen. If not, I'll do so in the future.

"Actually, this is best quarters we've had since our deployment." Can't say I'm too surprised, many people in the imperium take the guard for granted. They may not be space marines, but it takes balls to fight daemons and who knows what with no special augmentations.

"That's good to hear, make sure to let me know if any issues arise." Happy troops make a good army. He almost seemed surprised at this.

"My lord, I am Sebas Pervidus. I am your butler and the administrator of your servants. Is there anything you require?" He's as smooth as his anime counterpart.

"Not at the moment. Thank you for vigilance." I wonder if he's also a fighter.

"You need not thank me my lord."

"My name is Uramus Praxo. I believe I need little introduction." Rather quick to the point, I'll give him that.

"Of course, your role is invaluable. I hope you do your family proud." I really do, the warp doesn't play nice.

"If nothing is required of me, I will return to my station." I'm the same way dude. Trust me.

"Very well." He then seemed to disappear. Pretty much all of the others seemed irritated with him. Navigators were never particularly liked due them being mutants. Not to mention, they almost have free reign on Terra.

"I'm the head overseer of the crew, Virgo Schnee. If they do something foolish, they answer to me. And I assure you, they will answer dearly." Her voice was as smooth as silk, but held a deep sadism. "Very dearly." She finished with a terrifying smile, right in my ear. I felt a shutter.

"I must request you give the lord his space Lady Schnee." Sebas was polite but firm. Gabriel was very upset, and went into a litany. Esdeath was ready to go Albedo on this Shalltear.

"Enough!" I knew I needed to put this down or I'd never nip the chaos. Everyone went silent, though Gabriel looked more than a little irritated.

"I will not have any disorder on the bridge. Sebas, bring me a list of events in this sector." He gave a curt nod and left.

"Lady Gabriel, I apologize for interrupting your litany, but I needed to establish order. Please go attend to your new station, and I will visit later." Her anger melted away and was replaced with a serene smile as she walked off.

"Colonel Verrids, please bring me a written breakdown of your regiment's specialization, equipment, and roster." I needed to know the best way to use the regiment. He gave me a crisp salute and he left.

"Magos Erium-Rho-0, please return to your duties, I will speak with you later. I have a technical matters to discuss." The adept seemed pleased to know his employer cared about the more technical aspects of the fleet as he turned and left.

"Overseer Schnee, please conduct yourself in a more professional manner in the bridge. Save those advances for a better setting." The overseer gave a victorious look to a shocked Esdeath before left in a prance. She's going to be a problem, even if she doesn't become a chaos cultist.

"Esdeath, do not get too upset over Overseer Schnee, that is her demeanor. Besides, you're my best assistant." She beamed a happy smile.

"Thank you my lord. I'm glad I was made for you." I swear, I'm going be like Ainz.

What I didn't expect was to here a familiar sound from my pocket. The whole bridge froze at the sound. Somehow the new noise was much more interesting. A bit of shuffling in my pocket revealed my smartphone, which just got a text from an unknown number. One of the nearby tech-priest came over.

"Lord-Captain, may I inquire as to the nature of this device?" Oh crap.

"This is an omniscreen. A calculator, communicator, dataslate, camera, and translator all in one. Assuming you can access an application storage, other tools can be added. At least that's what the tech priest told me." I'm going to have to be very careful with this. I'm not sure if a smartphone would considered heresy.

"What an interesting device."

I decided to log in and check the phone, and found a few things changed.

There were a few new apps, one with the Mechanicus symbol, another with what I think is an Aeldari symbol. The next apps showed a picture of the galaxy, a Tau symbol, and a strange helmet. The final one is an Aquila against a black background.

The secret porn apps were gone, which was probably a good thing. The LTE was replaced with a new IMV. The phone's systems were all upgraded with new unidentifiable systems.

My old pictures and documents were still there, however, there were many new documents. Many of these were wiki articles and snippets of useful lore on Warhammer 40k. Many of these bits would be extremely useful as a rogue trader, especially the ones talking about the STC fragments. The danger is how to successfully use this information without triggering the inquisition or mechanicus.

After all this, I realized I had a new message from Mark? He was my gaming buddy.

Enjoy your new life friend. Interesting to see an isekai so long after the death of anime, isn't it? Anyway, I may have swapped you with a fake hero who planned to use a daemonic invasion to take over his planet via heroism. He'd ending running it into the ground, so I decided to send you in his place in the aftermath. Just to let you know, the apps all are all Omnissiah approved, so you don't need to worry. Be sure to check them, I worked hard to make them.

I let out a sigh of relief, this made things much easier. Somehow, the fact that my best friend is somehow still alive doesn't seem too strange, nor that he had extensive power in the imperium.Another text arrived.

Don't worry about your search history and porn stashes. All taken care of bro.

That was the mark of a true friend. He simply had to be the emperor, no one else understands the sheer amount of brotherhood depicted in a such an action. Nor the culture needed to understand isekai.

End!


A/N I hope that wasn't too cringe or anything like that, this is my first story.

1. So can anyone guess the purpose of the apps?

2. Did I get the rankings write for the various commanders? I didn't know much for who would attend alongside a rogue trader.