Batman Begins to Begin

By Mice

Alfred could make out the outline of his charge at the kitchen table in the dark early morning. He almost hated turning on the lights all the way, but by the intensity Bruce Wayne was hovered over the table, Alred knew that there was a very special conversation about to occur.

"Master Bruce, it's nearly 2 a.m. in the morning. You should be in bed."

Bruce didn't even jump as the lights went on. "I know, Alfred. I couldn't sleep."

"Thinking about your parents getting murdered in front of you again? Do not worry, Master Bruce. Detective Gordon will catch the culprit and justice will eventually be served."

A deep sigh. "No. I'm afraid it's more serious than that."

Alfred felt his chest tighten. He knew this day would come. He put a hand on Bruce's shoulder. "Master Bruce, you know that I despise violence. But, if you want to become a vigilante to avenge your parents because the cops in Gotham are too corrupt, you have my full support."

"What? No, that's not it either. It's…Alfred? Am I cute?"

The quick change in trajectory made Alfred temporarily untethered. "You're twelve. Nobody is cute when they are twelve. Now that was quickly solved, let's get back to –"

Bruce kicked the table leg. "Daniel Jacobson is cute."

"Who in blazes is Daniel Jacobson?"

"Diedre Vanderbeer's boyfriend."

"A girl? Master Bruce, don't you think you should be more concerned with vigilante justice than girls?"

"I mean…probably? I just feel like I can always revisit the idea of avenging my parents later in life. Like when I have a driver's license. Right now, Diedre is an exchange student who is leaving at the end of this year and she smells like, soap?"

Alfred brought a hand to his head. "Oh, if your parents could hear you now, Master Bruce. Their only son and heir to the Wayne Enterprises talk about how he's all smitten over some Eurotrash girl, do you know what they would say?"

Bruce smiled hopefully. "'Ask her over for dinner son. You're much cuter than Daniel Jacobson!'"

"NO! No, they would NOT say that – they could NOT say that because they are DEAD! DEAD, MASTER BRUCE, DEAD!"

"…it's really good soap, Alfred. European—"

"DEAD, MASTER BRUCE! Now, what are you sketching here…"

Alfred went to the notebook to look, but Bruce held it tightly to his chest.

"No, don't look! It's private!"

After a short tug of war, Alfred succeeded in taking away the secret notebook of the richest twelve year-old in Gotham City. And what he found in there pleased him.

"Now, this. This is what I'm talking about!" Alfred's eyes filled with pride as he saw several sketches of a dark menacing figure in a hooded cowl and cape in various escapades. "Look at this guy here – is that you? Beating up a thug?"

"Yeah. That's Batman. I'm…Batman."

"Let's see…utility belt, grappling hook, mask and a cape…Master Bruce, I was hoping you'd be a vigilante, but a costumed vigilante? I'm proud of you, Master Bruce – or should I say, Batman."

Bruce hated to deflate Alfred's excitement, but this conversation was getting out of hand. "Actually, Batman is more like a vigilante of love! See, the grappling hook is so I can climb up to Diedre's window and the utility belt? I so I can distract the guard dogs or security shark that would get in my way!"

"And the mask and cape?"

Bruce put his head down on the table. "To cover up my ugly face because I'm not cute like Daniel Jacobson!"

"Then who is the thug in this picture?"

"DANIEL JACOBSON," Bruce replied, head still on the table.

Alfred shook his head in revulsion. "I failed you. Your parents trusted me and I failed you."

Bruce moved his head to make sure that Alfred wasn't crying. He couldn't take that. "You didn't fail Alfred, it's just…I'm twelve. I mean, sure, I am overcome with grief over my parents double murder that happened before my eyes….but I am also so overcome with finding out what kind of soap Diedre Vanderbeer uses. So much so that I designed this."

Bruce flipped to a page in the notebook. It had the skill of a well educated twelve year-old and the heart of a naïve twelve year-old to Alfred's pain and delight.

"It's a Batcomputer." Bruce explained. "Because once I figure out what kind of soap it is, I will be the world's greatest detective."

Alfred stared at his charge. So much possibility.

"Master Bruce, if I help you find out more about Donna—"

"Diedre."

"…Diedre. Will you at least consider taking a tae kwon do class?"

"Will I?!" Bruce lept up to hug Alfred.

Trust the process, Alfred, Alfred thought as he hugged Bruce. This Eurotrash will break his heart and soon, his only mistress will be vengeance.

The End