Disclaimer: I do not own Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time; it belongs to Nintendo. Neither am I the originator of Linked Universe; that honor belongs to jojo56830. :)

AN: The prompt on the LU Discord server this week was "Rivalries". This was my entry. :)

Doesn't have to be Linked Universe, necessarily, but the characters are intended as such.

For anyone who isn't familiar with LU, all you need to know is that It's Link and Malon from Ocarina Of Time, and Link and Malon have started dating, so Link is spending a lot of time around Lon Lon Ranch.
...

Thank you to the people on the LU server who helped me choose a title for this fic! The winner is, of course, the official title of the fic, which can be seen...in, y'know. The title.

Honorable mentions for title ideas that were suggested:

-Got Milk?

-The LonLon Tradition

-To Challenge A Farmer's Daughter

-The Milkoff

Milking something For All It's Worth

"You want to have a what?!" Link asked. He honestly wasn't sure what brought this on. Malon was usually fairly level-headed, if a bit of a firecracker at times. But this new brand of off-the-wall? He must be influencing her more than he thought.

"A milking contest! You take one cow, I take the other, we see who finishes milking their cow first. C'moooon, I know you've done crazier things than this during your little quests!"

Link stared at his girlfriend. He opened his mouth "I-..." He closed it again, turning to consider the cows. "What if one of the cows has more milk than the other?"

Malon frowned. "Hmm. I suppose that could be an issue." She considered for a moment, then brightened as something occurred to her. "I know! We'll see who can get the most milk in five minutes!"

Link blinked. "Who's going to be timing this?"

She shot him a broad grin. "You are, of course! That little time-tracking trick of yours ought to come in handy for something after all!"

He coughed. "I suppose so."

The two of them stood there awkwardly for a few moments, then Link smiled wryly. "Well...If we're gonna do this, then we'd better get started, huh?"

Link stared at his opponent from across the barn. "Ready?"

Malon gave a determined nod. "Ready!"

Link steadied himself, preparing for some intense milking. "One, two, three- GO!"

And they were off! Milk splashed into their buckets at a rapid rate, pooling at the bottom as the amount of liquid increased. Malon's bucket filled rapidly as she set a firm, steady rhythm, but Link started out a bit slow at first, not entirely used to the actual process of milking just yet. He'd been helping out more around the ranch since he started seeing Malon, but he still didn't have quite as much finesse as she did with some of the daily chores. However, he began picking up speed as he went on, and was soon matching Malon squirt for squirt, then surpassing her after a little longer. As he milked the cow, he took note of how long it had been.

2 minutes...2 and a quarter...2 and a half...

Around the 3 and a half minute mark, Link found himself flagging, while Malon kept going as steady as ever.

...Perhaps it hadn't been the best idea to push up to his top speed as quickly as possible. I might have to slow down soon, he thought. So much for my Heroic endurance...No! I can beat her! I want to win-I can do this! He eased off his pace a bit for the sake of his hands, but made sure he continued to match or outpace Malon.

Four and a half minutes...

Link's hands and arms were straining, and his momentum had suffered for it. He was accustomed to physical exertion, holding a sword for long periods of time, swinging it in battle, pulling back on a bowstring...but this was different. This was a job that required opening and closing the hand repeatedly, and squeezing and pulling downwards, and Link's muscles weren't used to such a specific action.

Come on...just a little more...fifteen seconds...ten seconds...five seconds...

"Time!" he yelped, the moment his internal ticker hit zero. He dropped his aching hands onto his lap in relief, alternating between stretching his fingers and pressing them into fists.

Malon giggled at his reaction. "Honestly, fairy boy. You would've been fine if you'd kept it steady, but no, Mr. Hero just had to see how fast he could go-"

"Alright, alright, you don't need to rub it in." He grabbed his bucket and moved to the doorway of the barn, glancing into her bucket as he went past. "Looks like you've got a lot of milk in there."

"You haven't done so bad yourself, ya know. Have you even looked in your bucket?

He hadn't, actually. Link had been so focused on the blessedness of being done that he hadn't even checked his final product.

Malon placed her bucket next to his and plopped onto the bench beside him. The two of them studied the results of their handiwork, comparing how high the milk was in each pail.

Malon raised an eyebrow. "Well, I'll be." She peered up at Link. "Maybe that extra burst of speed did you some good in this contest after all."

Link blinked at her. "What's that supposed to mean?"

She smirked. "It means we tied, fairy boy. I'll have you know I've held the town record for milking for the last five years!" She gave him a friendly slap on the shoulder. "We'll make a proper rancher outta you yet! Just you wait."

Link gazed at her for a moment, feeling pleasantly warm, then turned to stare out at the horses feeding nearby.

A proper rancher, huh...I could get behind that...

"Say, Malon."

"Hmm?"

"You wanna have another milking contest tomorrow?"

She beamed happily. "Why, Link! I thought you'd never ask!"

AN: I really do enjoy writing oneshots, don't I? I really need to get back on my HP fic, lol!

I felt the Time and Malon's early relationship needed a bit more representation. Late-game relationship is great and all, but early-game where they're still just starting to learn more about each other? Mmmmm, perfect. :P