A/N: Thank you all for your patience. Unfortunately I fell roughly under the weather, and had to remain in bed for those two first days, which prevented me from writing. I am still taking it easy, but finally picked up writing again and working on this story that has won many of your hearts. :) I am very excited to bring this next chapter to you all, but remember, there is still a few more things to go through before Emma and Regina can FINALLY come together for good. Tomorrow, if the day agrees with me, expect another chapter. I will not stop until this story is finished. Happy reading!
Emma looked around the house again, stoking the piano with the tip of her fingers as she walked on by. The rain picked up more, tapping loudly all around the house. When Daniel left he had left the inside door open, which Emma felt free to close.
As Regina walked down the hall and into the living room, she spotted Emma looking around, and she didn't know why but she smiled. Well, she did know why. It amazed her how well her purple flannel shirt fit Emma. She really liked the sight of her in it.
"Hey," Emma breathed, her eyes catching sight of Regina wearing a blue denim shirt with its sleeves rolled up.
"Clothes are washing now." Regina informed her. "Are you hungry?"
"Uh, no," Emma shakes her head. "No, thank you." Her eyes fall on the flat screen tv that's positioned by the wall of the living room. "You have a tv here?"
"That's Daniel's. I let him stay here while I'm gone, sometimes."
"Oh, I see." The blonde nodded to herself. "And, where does he stay when he doesn't stay here?"
"His father lives nearby." Regina remains still and decides to observe Emma as she is looking underneath the tv stand, looking at Daniel's film collection, no doubt.
Damn. He has good taste in films, too. Emma stood up right, shutting the tv stand door. "I'm surprised you allowed him to drive home in this weather. Figured you would want him to stay here with you."
Regina's brow raised at the bitter tone in Emma's voice. Somehow she suspected, that's how Emma meant for it to sound. "Correct me if I'm wrong, Ms. Swan…" Her arms cross over her chest. "But, do I detect jealousy coming from you?"
"Jeal- Me?" Emma points to her own chest as she shakes her head. "Why would I get jealous of stable boy?"
Regina can't help but chuckle, chewing on her bottom lip. She was jealous. Of Daniel of all people. "Ms. Swan," she calls out to Emma, going ignored as the blonde keeps her back turned to her, her gaze focused on a couple of pictures along the wall rather than Regina. "Emma." Her voice is sharper this time that it causes Emma to face her with an apologetic look in her eye.
"Okay, alright," Emma rolls her eyes, releasing a sharp sigh. "Maybe. Maybe I was a little jealous." Kill her now. Her cheeks burned so bad, she wondered just how red they had fallen.
To Emma's surprise, Regina just grinned.
"You're not mad?" Emma frowned, blinking a couple of times.
"Do you want me to be?" She asks, raising a perfect dark brow. "There's no need for you to be jealous of Daniel, Emma."
"I know," Emma nods. "I know. I shouldn't be jealous when we're not even-" She chuckles, shaking her head.
"And you're dating my daughter. Not to mention I'm a married woman." Regina states, her lips pressed into a thin line.
"Yeah." For the first time in her life, Emma wished she was single. But, Regina would still be married. And that sucked. "I'm sorry, I-" She sighs. "I don't know what's been going on with me lately, I've just been so-"
So much for holding back on her jealously.
"Emma." Regina calls out to her again, taking a few steps before her until they are face to face. Her eyes are so focused on Emma's green ones, she can see her nerves right through them. "I asked Daniel to leave."
"You did?" Emma blinked.
The brunette nods, and after a minute's silence she says, "I asked him to leave, because I wanted to be alone with you." Regina didn't know where this boldness was coming from once again. But, then again, who knew until how long they would have to wait out this storm. And to Regina, it seemed as if whatever mutual attraction was happening around them was becoming thicker and more visible by the minute.
Not that she was expecting for something to happen between them, because as painful as reality went- Regina knew that could never be possible.
Emma shouldn't be happy to hear Regina admit that she wanted to be alone with her, but she was. There was a smile stretched out across her lips that hurt her cheeks. And suddenly, she remembered what David had told her upon talking to him over the phone. "Oh." She breathed out, feeling absolutely foolish for being jealous of Daniel in the first place. And then, that smile was gone. "This is absolutely wrong, isn't it?"
"Emma," Regina's lips thinned into a grim frown. "This doesn't mean that we-"
"No." A crease formed in between Emma's brow. She didn't need to hear what Regina was about to say. "Don't say anything."
Suddenly, the air around them became so thin it was becoming difficult to breathe for either of them.
"You know what? I think I will have something. Maybe some popcorn." Emma shrugged, trying to lighten the mood. "Daniel does have some good taste in movies, maybe we could compliment that popcorn with a movie?"
Popcorn and a movie with Emma? That sounded absolutely wonderful to Regina.
"I would love that." Regina nodded. "Why don't you pick what we'll watch and I'll go make the popcorn?"
Emma smiled again, "Okay. Any particular favorites?"
Favorite films? Regina didn't have any. "I wouldn't know. I've never-" She chuckles, her cheeks turning pink. "We don't keep any televisions inside of the house, remember? Just Sidney."
"So… You've never seen… Anything?" Another crease forms in between Emma's brow, and as she sees Regina shake her head, she seems more shocked than she sounds. She knew Leopold was a monster toward Regina and obviously deprived her from a lot, but to deprive her from the joys of a good movie. That was something Emma intended to rectify.
"I'll go make the popcorn. You pick the film." Regina gives off a sad smile before she scatters into the kitchen.
Walking back toward where Daniel kept his movies, Emma begins to scan through them. This would be Regina's first film, therefore Emma had to make sure she picked something special, something that Regina could remember for the rest of her life. And as her finger caressed its way softly along the spines of all of the movies that were to their disposal on this stormy night, she stopped when she spotted one of her personal favorite films of all times.
Popcorn had never tasted better. A film had never been so thoroughly enjoyed.
The lime green bowl had been placed in between them to where both could have easy access to a handful of popcorn as Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman played out in classic black and white cinematic picture before them on the flat screen.
Casablanca being an all time classic film, happened to be Mary Margaret's favorites, so Emma grew up around black and white movies and was no stranger to them. Regina couldn't help herself to look out of the corner of her eye at the blonde, pleased to find that she would mouth to the lines of the movie as it played out, all down to the very last line. For being her first film, Regina found herself enjoying it. But she enjoyed experiencing it with Emma a whole lot more.
"What did you think?" Emma looked over at Regina once the credits rolled on the screen, taking popcorn from the palm of her hand and popping it into her mouth.
"I liked it. Honestly, I'm surprised you like these types of films."
"Why's that?" Emma's brow slightly flits.
"I don't mean to offend you, but you are a young girl and-" Regina shrugs, feeling her cheeks burn a little. She was actually thankful Emma jumped right in to interrupt her before she could finish what she was about to say.
"And I was lucky to grow up with a mother who made me watch these films with her." Emma chuckles, shaking her head.
"What?"
"Nothing. Just that every time you mention how young I am- I don't know." The blonde shakes her head again as she chews on another popcorn.
"Well, you are twenty-four years old, Emma." Regina states the obvious, her eyes not moving away from looking at Emma's features, followed by her eyes as they find hers again.
"Yeah, and I'll be twenty-five in a couple of days."
"Right."
"And you're forty years old."
"Exactly."
Emma rotates her body more until she is facing Regina directly this time. "And? Being forty doesn't make you ancient, Regina. Anyone can easily fall in love with the woman you are."
Regina scoffs at this. "Oh, really? And what kind of woman am I, Emma?"
Emma remains silent, looking into the woman's eyes so hard she can read a lot of her thoughts that are passing through her mind right now. Here they were, alone, locked away inside this house until the rain passed. They had enjoyed a nice moment, until things took another awkward turn again.
It was obvious to both of them, they had a lot of unspoken tension build up around them.
"Thank you. You can't even answer a simple question." Regina races off the couch, taking the bowl of popcorn along with her to the kitchen.
Emma races after her, leaving the credits of the film playing out on its own. She stands by one of the counters, seeing the back of the brunette's head as she's facing the sink. "If I tell you what I really see in you, will you stop me?"
Would she? Regina said nothing, giving Emma the indication that no, she wouldn't stop her. At least not today.
"When I first met you, I knew there was more to you than met the eye. I knew you weren't happy, and that all of your smiling I saw in your family pictures around the house, they were just for show. And everything was confirmed upon discovering what was really going on." Emma felt free to walk further into the kitchen, her eyes never leaving Regina's. "And that awful night when I saved you from doing the stupidest thing you could ever do to yourself, you told me you were broken, but you're not. You have cracks- visible but mendable. But above every one of those cracks, do you want to know what I really see?" She is standing right before her now and Emma's eyes to Regina couldn't look more beautiful as they did whenever she would look at her with that gentle sparkle gleaming off of her eye.
Regina can't talk. Especially not when Emma is standing so close to her now.
In a matter of seconds, they had gone from confronting Emma's jealousy, to enjoying a nice movie while sharing a civil conversation, to this. This, which was obviously a lot of that unspoken tension. That damn elephant in the room that hadn't shrunk since that kiss had happened, and that Regina didn't seem to want to talk about.
Well, not today.
If Regina was going to remain inside of this house until this bad weather was battled out- then she was going to listen to what Emma had to say.
"I see a beautiful woman. Beautiful beyond my wildest dreams. A woman who deserves to know the feel of a gentle stroke, or the warmth of a loving kiss. The beauty of a devoted gaze. And above all that, Regina, I see a woman who can do anything she puts her mind to. Who is stronger than anyone I've ever met, and if that weren't true, you wouldn't be finding yourself in this living nightmare of a situation for twenty-four years with a man who you don't even love."
"I'm not strong, Emma." Regina shakes her head. "I'm just terrified. There is no way I'll ever be able to be happy. It's just not in the cards for me. And I'm fine with that."
"Are you?" Emma's head tilts, searching for the true answer behind Regina's pained gaze. "Because, you know, in a game of cards, one can always get a better hand, you keep trying until you win."
"Life isn't a game, Ms. Swan." Regina chuckles as she flashes her wedding band before Emma. "This isn't a game. This is very much real."
"Like the kiss you gave me that night during dinner?" Emma's question freezes both of them over. It makes Regina remain rooted where she stands. "Look, Regina, I know you haven't been wanting to talk about what happened, but the truth is it happened. Just like all those other little moments happened between us."
"No," Regina shakes her head, too afraid to accept reality. "No, Emma, that-"
"Don't say it was just as friends. It may have started out that way, but," Emma closes her eyes for a moment. "Regina, you and I both know there is something more happening here. Bigger than the two of us put together."
"No, nothing is happening, because nothing can ever happen between us." Regina's eyes are wide. "Don't forget you are in a relationship with my daughter."
"Yeah, and you're a married woman, I know. And I know it's wrong, and I'll probably go to hell for it, but…" Green eyes sting as they become glassy with unshed tears. "Regina, I know you feel it, too. Whatever this is that's happening between us, I know it can go farther than-"
"That's just it, Emma." Regina scoffs, shaking her head. "It doesn't matter what we feel or don't feel for one another. It can never happen. Audrey or no Audrey. As long as Leopold is around, it can never be."
Emma's lips parted as if she wanted to say something, but didn't. Instead they closed back up, hardening into a thin line. She didn't get it. She got it, but didn't. Regina obviously felt something for her, too but was too afraid to act on it, too respectful over Audrey, and Leopold, even if the bastard didn't deserve her honesty and or her faithfulness. Don't get her wrong. This didn't mean she was okay with cheating- of course not- but, then what could she call this? Regina and her had only shared a kiss that had lasted no more than a minute, and her thoughts had been thrown off the table like a thousand five-hundred jigsaw puzzle, scrambled into a million pieces onto the floor that it has taken her forever to place back piece by piece.
She was all over the place, and she couldn't deal with it anymore. Especially not after seeing for how long Daniel continued to hug her.
What a mess she had become. Emma never even recollected being this jealous over one of Audrey's friends. Ever.
'It can never be.' Emma didn't choose to believe that, but if that's what Regina wanted to believe, if that was what she was too afraid not to believe instead of exploring these feelings further with her. Emma could respect that. But it didn't mean she would like it.
Before Emma could even say anything this time, thunder claps around them, this time causing the power to go out and leaving both women to stand in the dark, with the breakfast table right in between them, dividing their distance. The ongoing credits of Casablanca abruptly come to an end. Their eyes look around the small home before finding each other in the midst of darkness.
"Great," Regina huffs out a breath, her shoulders slump. "Well, looks like we won't be driving back just yet."
"I guess not." Emma's vision moved over to the fireplace in the living room before turning back to Regina. Her voice calm, "I could help you make a fire?"
Regina nods, moving along with Emma near the fireplace where both pick up a few cut up logs, already having been placed beside the fireplace. Both place a few logs inside before Emma steps back and allows Regina to light it. The warmth of the fire immediately surrounded them as they remained sitting by it. The crackling of the fire, followed by the rain and rumbling of the thunder were the only sounds that surrounded them for a while.
Both pairs of eyes remain on the dancing flames, and many things dance through both women's minds.
Maybe it was the tranquility that soon surrounded them. Maybe it was how drastically things had shifted between them a minute ago. Who knew, really. All they both had in common right now was that they were in no rush to get back.
Regina did really want to take this moment to be with Emma. As wrong as it felt for her.
"I really wanted to be with you, Emma." Emma's eyes turn to look into Regina's eyes, who are studying her within in the light of the fire burning before them. "I do." Regina answers truthfully, looking away from green sea eyes for a minute and onto the dancing flames. "And I hate myself for even admitting it out loud for the first time since I met you."
To Regina's surprise, she then felt the tip of Emma's pointer and middle fingers land right along her jaw, forcing her to look right into her eyes again. "Well, I don't hate you." Emma's smile is gentle.
Regina scoffs and looks away again. "How can you not hate me? I've not just taken an interest in just anyone. But my daughter's girlfriend." She chuckles, shaking her head.
"And she's taken quite an interest in you, too." Emma's voice is as soft as the gentle look in her eyes as Regina looks upon them. "So, if you are going to be hated for that, then I am, too."
Regina could feel her heart flutter inside of her chest. Emma liked her, too. And she didn't even have to ask her if this was real or God's honest truth. She could clearly see it in the girl's eyes as she looked into them. She could see her soul, dancing like the flames reflected in the green sea color of them. She needed no more confirmation.
"This is wrong, Emma." She whispers. "How could we possibly-?" Her voice came to a stop, her eyes closed upon feeling Emma's pointer finger place itself against her lips to quiet her voice.
Emma's eyes moved to the woman's scar and she finally felt brave enough to take her thumb, caress her way all along the woman's bottom lip, ending right at her scar just above. Emma wouldn't be believed if she told anyone this, but being able to finally have the privilege to touch this scar that haunted her dreams, and her thoughts for so long, had become her own personal safe haven. She never wanted to stop.
"I don't know how this happened, Regina. Or when for that matter." Emma's voice allowed Regina to come back into reality, and find gentle green eyes staring at her. "But, if this feeling that's happening between us is wrong… Then why does it continue to grow?"
Regina's eyes sting with unshed tears as she shakes her head, removing Emma's hand from her lips.
"Last night when I came home with Audrey, and you, under the influence of a couple of drinks," Regina winced at the memory. "Told me that I was a 'Forbidden Temptation.'" Emma smiles, feeling more at ease in caressing the light blush against Regina's cheek. "Well, that's just it. I am your 'forbidden temptation,' and you are mine."
"Except I'll never be yours, Emma." Regina's eyes look into Emma's very soul, her voice soft. "And you can never be mine."
This pained Emma to hear. Her eyes wanted to shed tears that she absolutely prevented herself from doing. Because right now wasn't the moment to cry. Not when it was just her and Regina.
Crying would solve nothing.
She just wanted to live in this tiny moment.
Breathe in everything about it.
Instead she adjusted herself on the floor, scooting just a little closer to Regina, and welcoming herself to brush back a strand of black hair behind the brunette's ear. "And what if I could?" Emma whispered. "What if we could belong to each other just for tonight?"
Just for tonight? Regina's head tilted, more so to Emma's touch than in thought. Regina could hang to every word Emma ever spoke. It was impossible not to.
Emma's hand cups Regina's cheek again, her thumb gently stroking along the cheekbone. "Regina," her voice is a whisper that Regina can hear even through the loud thunder. "I could be yours if you-"
"Shh," This time it's Regina's fingers that place themselves over Emma's soft, thin lips. Her eyes are equally gentle as they look into Emma's deep green sea ones. "Let's not talk about what's impossible, Emma."
"It's not impossible." Emma whispers, freely reaching for Regina's hand with her own. Their hands are so shocked to the touch that they go limb. "It can't be impossible. Not when circumstances keep bringing us this close to one another."
"Emma," Regina shakes her head, but her fingers remain immobile along with Emma's. Her eyes look down at them. At how perfect they felt wrapped in one another.
"Regina." Emma's voice is as firm as her stare, that Regina can't help but look into her eyes. "I don't know what this is, okay? But, I do know that I've never felt anything like this, ever, in my entire life. And I want-"
"It doesn't matter what you want, Emma." Regina's voice breaks now. Her jaw clenched so tight it makes her bottom lip tremble. "It doesn't matter what I want either. Liking you is wrong. You are the same age as my daughter, can't you understand how that makes me look?"
"Probably the same way it makes me look." Emma shrugs, her eyes glance down at their fingers, and that's when she dares to allow her index finger to caress one of Regina's long fingers, so softly it gives them both chills.
Regina sighs, looking up from looking at how softly Emma's finger dances along her skin. "I can't hurt my daughter this way, Emma. And you shouldn't either. You and Audrey have plans, plans that have absolutely nothing to do with me."
Plans Emma wasn't sure she wanted anymore. "Regina, plans can always change." She says truthfully, seeing the horror build up on the brunette's face.
"What are you saying?" Regina's eyes display the fear that's bubbling up inside of her. The thought of Emma not being with Audrey anymore haunting her, but conflicting her with a happiness she shouldn't be feeling. "Emma," Rapidly she shakes her head. "You can't hurt her like this."
"So, you'd rather hurt instead?" Emma asks bluntly.
"It's how my life's always been." Regina swallows down the lump in her throat to fight back tears from erupting from her eyes. "And now I have to go through life feeling attracted to the most forbidden woman. And that's okay. I'd rather hurt and see my daughter happy, than hurt because I broke her heart."
Emma took the back of her knuckle to wipe away a fallen tear from Regina's cheek. So gently, she could feel the brunette lean into her touch. "You are something else, Regina Mills. Just when I think I can't possibly like you more, you prove me wrong."
Regina smiles, seeing a smile of Emma's own erupt from her lips. "That's not fair, Ms. Swan."
"What's fair anymore?" Emma shrugs. "I never imagined myself crushing on my girlfriend's mom, yet here we are."
Regina cringed a little, hearing a chuckle erupt from Emma's throat. "Okay, if I am agreeing to open up while we are stuck in this house for God knows how long, I'm going to need you not to say that term to me." Plus she didn't need to be reminded that Emma was dating her daughter. It remained fresh in her mind constantly already.
"Deal." Emma grins. "As long as you agree to start overlooking our age differences."
"Emma-" Regina rolls her eyes, and Regina can't help but find it endearing.
"No. I'm serious about this, Regina." Emma's brow slightly lifts, and Regina can't help but find it attractive. Another thing added to her list.
"I am, too. It's crazy enough we are here, admitting this- whatever this thing is between us- but to look at our age differences…"
"Okay." Emma rolls her eyes this time, sighing deeply. "Let's get this other elephant out of the room. So, you're forty and I'm twenty-four. There. It's out in the open. I am attracted to Audrey's mom, who happens to be sixteen years older than me. All because she is a very beautiful woman, and smart and a total bookworm, which I might add, is attractive in itself." She gasps dramatically. "My God, you're right- the horror!"
"Alright, enough," Regina playfully shoves Emma who laughs a rich laugh that pulls at Regina's heart strings. "Fine. I guess our age difference isn't that bad. But, can you imagine," Regina shifts on the floor, scooting closer to Emma. "If we had met under different circumstances, do you think we would still be feeling all of this?"
A tiny smile tugged at the corner of Emma's lip, and Regina couldn't look away. It looked even more beautiful and tempting with the light the fire provided. "I'd like to think so. Why not?" Emma shrugged a one shoulder shrug. "Look at how we met, and yet, look at where we are now, talking about this mutual feeling blooming between us."
Regina smiles, her cheeks rosy pink, and Emma can't help but brush away at the pink coloring so softly with her thumb. She couldn't help but keep her eyes locked on hers, until she worked up the courage to reach for Emma's hand, which surprised Emma, but who was she to stop it? She just enjoyed the sight of Regina as she brought her palm up to her lips and placed a gentle kiss right inside.
Emma couldn't explain what that made her feel. She just knew, she didn't wish for this moment to end. And from the looks of it, neither did Regina.
"I'm sorry." Regina whispered, wanting to release the blonde's hand but was surprised to feel Emma's fingers hold hers in place. Her eyes found Emma's sea green ones, and she couldn't possibly look away anymore.
"I'm not." Emma whispered, her eyes moved down to those lips that haunted her mind. "Because if I told you how much I wanted to kiss you right now, you would probably hate me, and throw me out into the storm."
Regina chuckled, shaking her head. "Does your sense of humor ever know when to stop?"
"Unfortunately not." Emma shakes her head, grinning from ear to ear. A grin that soon disappeared as her cell phone was heard vibrating. As she reached for it, a frown took over her lips, same as Regina's as they saw Audrey was calling.
"It's okay." Said Regina in a sad tone of voice. "Answer it."
Emma's thumb lingered on the call button for a minute, her eyes remaining locked on Regina's sad gaze that would forever be tattooed in her mind and in her heart. Yes, reality sucked. Yes, for the first time ever Emma wished her and Regina had met under different circumstances. But this is the card they were dealt and Emma was going for a one time only hand. For now.
"Emma, what are you-?" Regina's frown deepened upon seeing Emma turn off her phone and place it inside of her back pocket. "She's going to worry if you don't-"
"Stop worrying about her so much. We're in the middle of a storm, you and me. Let's pretend for a minute that we are under different circumstances."
"What do you mean?" Regina whispered, her eyes locking into Emma's gentle green ones.
"I mean, you are Regina. And I am Emma." Emma's hand gently caresses its way through Regina's hair, until it cups the back of her neck, so gently it could stop Regina's entire time.
Could Regina do this? Just for tonight? Could she allow herself to feel as if her and Emma found themselves under different circumstances? Could she let go of every worry in her head and just go with what felt so right, but was so wrong in its own reality?
Before she could even answer this question to herself, Regina found herself slowly leaning in, feeling herself being caught in a trance that were Emma's eyes. Same as Emma found herself in Regina's brown gaze, leaning in slowly until she was met right in the middle. Their lips clashing together in the most soft, slow, and gentle manner that neither of them knew what to do with.
What was left to do but kiss?
And kiss, they did.
Regina couldn't believe it. Emma couldn't believe it. All they could do was feel as their lips moved in sync. With fear, confidence and something else blooming inside of their hearts, inside of their lungs, inside of the very bottom of their stomachs, it felt like both the groups of flapping butterflies that belonged to them came together to form something atomic that exploded around them.