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It had been a normal day.

I would have had a hard time separating today from any other. It was nothing special.

Kind of like me.

I was just a normal pizza delivery driver. For the past six weeks, I had been working for the local pizza chain, and my job was to deliver pizza in my parent's car. They had been on me about getting a job, and in my 16-year-old mind, a pizza delivery driver was the best bet.

I imagined that eventually I would deliver a pizza to a bored housewife and give her some extra meat.

That still hasn't happened.

The only wives I had been meeting were the bitchy kind. I was required to hand off the orders in person and get the customer's signature, but I tried to complete the conversation in under 30 seconds. And I tried not to ever make eye contact.

Not everyone was an asshole, but a lot of people were. I could kind of understand where they were coming from though. I'd be pretty pissed if my order was wrong too, but I was just the delivery guy. Screaming at me wasn't going to help them.

And without the benefit of horny MILFs, being a pizza delivery driver just wasn't worth it.

So I was just hoping to stick it out until college. Save up enough money so I could afford to work only part-time while I attended classes.

But that's when disaster struck.

I was returning from a delivery when I got stuck behind a slow-moving vehicle.

"Why can't people learn how to drive?" I muttered, stepping on the gas. I swerved to the left, into the lane reserved for cars going in the opposite direction.

There wasn't anyone ahead of me so I thought it would be fine. I glanced back to make sure I wouldn't tap the car behind me when I drifted back into the right lane, and those few seconds I took my eye off the road were all it took.

A large transport truck made a right turn from a side street and right into the land I was occupying. The eighteen-wheeler had no way of knowing that I would be driving on the wrong side of the road because of my impatience. I turned the wheel sharply and tried to swerve out of the way, but it was too late.

My parents' little sedan was smashed by the large transport.

0o0

Sasuke Uchiha came back to life with a gasp.

My heart pounded madly, and my breathing was ragged.

"You're alive!"

I stared up a the pink-haired girl kneeling above as my mind raced. That's Sakura. Hmm, that's a pretty good cosplay.

Sakura put her hand on my cheek. "Sasuke, you were so...cold," she whispered. "I thought that you were gone."

Why is she calling me Sasuke? That isn't my name, I wondered, confused. Then a rush of memories that weren't mine flashed through my brain like a movie. Growing up in Konoha. A loving big brother. The Uchiha Massacre. Attending the ninja academy. Graduating and joining Team 7. Going on his first mission outside the village.

Dying.

Right, Haku was supposed to hit me with the same fake-death senbon move he used on Zabuza. He must have messed up and killed the real Sasuke. I tried to move my body. I could move, but not a lot. A twitch of a finger, a wriggle of my toes. That was all I could manage.

It was probably all I'd be capable of for the next few days. I could remember Kakashi explaining that it would take Zabuza at least a weak to recover from Haku's deception.

"Sakura..." Tazuna said gently, coming to stand next to Sakura. "Go ahead and cry. Just pretend I'm not even here."

Tears flooded Sakura's eyes as she struggled to speak. "Wh-when I was at the academy, I aced every test. I memorized the Rules of Conduct, every one of them.

I noticed Sakura was trembling all over. Wow, she really cared about Sasuke. Like, a lot.

"One day the sensei asked up about Rule 25. I wrote down the answer just like always: A ninja must never show emotion no matter what happens!" Sakura sobbed. "The assignment always comes first. And never, ever shed a tear."

So this is my life as a ninja life, I thought sadly. Simple as that.

There were more important things he needed to focus on. Now that I was Sasuke Uchiha, I had a hard life ahead of me. The next two months were going to be absolute hell. I was going to have to deal with the Chunin Exams. Orochimaru. Gaara. The Invasion. The Sound Four.

Ahh! My life had just gotten so much harder! It was crazy!

I felt my body being moved. I panicked for a brief moment, knowing that it couldn't be me. Then I relaxed when I realized that it was Sakura. She was lifting my head of the ground.

"Even though ninjas aren't supposed to show emotion..." Sakura was crying heavily now. Her tears splattered against my face. "I was terrified I'd have to live without you, Sasuke! I couldn't do it! I'd rather die with you!"

What the fuck? I started at Sakura. I knew she "loved" Sasuke, but she barely knew me—him! Yet here she was, claiming she'd rather die than live without him?

Sakura laid my head gently in her lap. Sadly, I wasn't face down in her thighs, but she had at least had me looking forward so he could see Zabuza kick ass.

Further up the bridge, Zabuza choked, gasping for breath. He still carried his sword, but the handle was smeared with his blood. His wounded left arm drooped limply by his side.

"Why can't I catch up?" He dashed forward with all the fighting spirit he could muster, swinging his massive sword wildly, but Kakashi was already gone.

Suddenly, Kakashi was behind Zabuza, a hand on the back of the swordsman's neck. "You can never beat me now," Kakashi said.

I blinked at the sudden movement. There was no swirl of leaves or a puff of smoke. I didn't even see Kakashi move and I'd been staring right at Zabuza. He was just...there. Pure speed.

"What?" Zabuza gasped.

"It's over. You just haven't realized it yet," Kakashi said. He held two kunai together and swung them at Zabuza. "This is goodbye, Demon of the Mist..."

Zabuza pulled back his sword and twisted his body. The kunai missed his vital organs and slashed his right arm.

Kakashi stumbled backward and fell on his side, but quickly pulled himself up. Zabuza looked helplessly at his two mangled arms.

"Well, Zabuza! He certainly made a mess out of you!" a familiar voice called out.

I recognized the voice from the Naruto Anime. Gato had arrived, and with his small army of fodder.

Zabuza raised his bloody face to look. "Gato..."

The most hated man in the Land of Waves was approaching from beyond the bridge. He didn't come alone. A small army of samurai and bandits were with him.

I could see Naruto was glaring at Gato with angry eyes. I didn't blame him. Naruto was a good person at heart, and this short, ugly man was to blame for all the suffering in the Land of Waves.

"What are you doing here?" Zabuza growled. "And why did you bring all of them?"

"There's been a change of plans," Gato snickered. "Your plans, anyway. This was what I had in mind all along. "You're going to die "Demon"...here and now."

"What?"

"You must have guessed I never intended to pay you. It's such a bother hiring skilled ninjas from one of the top villages. And they tend to have friends who object when I betray and kill them. That's why I hire rouge ninja. No one complains if I kill them at the end of a job. It's a great business plan—efficient and inexpensive."

Zabuza growled underneath his mask.

"You're no demon, Zabuza!" Gato scoffed. "Just a little baby devil."

Gato threw his head back and laughed. The samurai and bandits join in, hooting and hollering. Zabuza didn't seem to scare them one bit.

I could practically hear their uneducated thoughts. There was only one of him, after all, and lots and lots of us!

They were idiots.

If none of them knew how to mold chakra, a jonin-level ninja could cut through a hundred samurai. Probably a thousand.

Zabuza turned to Kakashi. "Looks like I have no reason to kill the bridge building now. Our fight is officially over," he said soberly.

"Agreed," Kakashi nodded, keeping his eyes on Gato and his army.

Suddenly, Gato noticed Haku on the ground. He rushed up and cruelly kicked his corpse. "That brat broke my wrist!" he spit out. "Look at him down, dead! And good riddance!"

Naruto glowered at Gato. "Leave him alone you creep!" he shouted, running toward him.

Kakashi quickly grabbed the back of his jumpsuit. "Calm down, Naruto," he warned. "There are way too many of them for you to handle."

While Kakashi held him back, Naruto yelled at Zabuza. "Why are you just standing there? You meant everything to him! Didn't he mean anything to you?"

"Shut up, kid. Haku is dead."

"But that scumbag stepped on his face! Don't you even care?" Naruto snapped.

"Gato used me, and I used Haku," Zabuza muttered. "Those are the two kinds of ninja in this world. Ninja who use people, and ninja who get used."

Zabuza gazed into the distance for a moment all dramatic-like.

I almost snorted. For a good five seconds, no one did a thing. They all just let him stare into the distance. Like he knew, somewhere out in the multiverse people were watching him and he was trying to build tension before he spoke again.

"I didn't want Haku for himself," he finally said. "I only wanted his skills. I have no regrets whatsoever."

"Do you...do you really mean that?" Naruto asked with astonishment.

"Let it go, Naruto," Kakashi said firmly. "This fight is over. Besides, we have to—"

Naruto wriggled away from Kakashi. "Shut up! He's still my enemy!" he shouted.

Zabuza just looked at the ground. He was having a hard time facing Naruto. Kakashi had nothing to say, either. But Naruto refused to let the matter drop.

"He cared about you!" Naruto yelled, pointing at Haki. "Don't you feel anything for him?"

Here comes the Talk no Jutsu, I thought, slightly annoyed. Not at this particular use of the Jutsu, but at the Jutsu itself. Later in the series, it was all Naruto did. Talk, talk, talk.

To literally almost all of his enemies!

After Obito, I literally stopped reading. Between that and the filler, I was done. Of course, now I wish I would have kept watching because I had no idea how the series ended.

"He gave his life for you!" Naruto shouted, pulling my attention back to what was happening on the bridge.

Right, I was on a bridge filled with people who wanted to kill me. I had to keep focused. Not that I could do much if Gato did order his men to attack. My body was still locked up in a death-like state.

"He never even had his own dream! All he cared about was your dream!" Naruto was crying now, tears streaming down his face.

"Kid," Zabuza muttered.

"That's terrible!" Naruto choked.

"Kid!" Zabuza muttered, louder this time.

Naruto looked up with surprise. Zabuza's eyes were glistening with tears.

"Not another word," he whispered. He looked away for a long moment, then turned back to Naruto. "Haku was too kind. He never truly wanted to kill anybody."

Zabuza ripped off his tattered mask before he went on.

"I'm glad my last battle was against you," he told Naruto. "And you're right, you know."

"Huh?" Naruto asked.

"We ninja are still people after all, with the same feelings as anyone..."

Zabuza sighed.

"Now I've lost everything," he said quietly. There were no more tears in his eyes. In fact, Zabuza looked almost peaceful, as if he had finally accepted his fate.

But he still wasn't ready to walk away.

"Can I borrow your kunai, kid?" he suddenly asked.

Oh, here we go! If my body could move, I would have been shaking with anticipation. I was about to see one of the most badass parts of Part 1 in person.

"Sure," Naruto said, tossing it to him. Zabuza caught it in his mouth and ran toward Gato.

"Kill him!" Gato screamed. "Kill all of them!"

The samurai excitedly raise their weapons and rushed forward, ready to show their stuff. They pierced Zabuza with so many weapons he looked like a pincushion, but he still didn't fall.

Gato gaped with shock as Zabuza tore through his army, samurai by samurai until he was standing right in front of him, the kunai still in his mouth.

Zabuza grinned as he stabbed Gato in the gut. Three samurai instantly thrust spears into his back, but Zabuza still didn't go down.

"Why won't you die?" a samurai wailed.

"You want to join your little friend? Then go there alone!" Gato choked, blood streaming from his mouth.

"I won't be allowed to go to the same place as Hakui," Zabuza said clamly.

"Wh-what are you babbling about?" Gato stuttered.

"I'm going to a hotter place—and I'm taking you with me!" Zabuza roared.

He yanked the kunai out of Gato. More blood spurted from his gut.

"When we get there, then you'll see who's a little baby devil!" Zabuza laughed, lunging at Gato's neck.

Gato's severed head flew like a comet with a bloody tail. Then it fell to earth and rolled toward the samurai who shrieked in horror.

Zabuza glared at them as he stood beside Gato's body. The kunai that had killed their kingpin was still clenched between his teeth.

Huh?

I blinked at the sudden end of the fighting. The anime really stretched things out, because that only took like five seconds!

Still, I glanced at the dozen dead samurai bodies. Zabuza had just killed twelve people with a kunai held between his teeth. In my world, this would be considered a national tragedy. A massacre.

But here, the strength to do something like this was celebrated.

And it was the kind of strength that I needed. No—I needed to get even stronger! Compared to the ninja I was inevitably going to be fighting in the next few years, Zabuza really was a little baby devil.

Well, at least I still have the Sharingan.