TITLE: "Loving you in the dark."
PAIRING: Alexander and Hephaestion.
RATING: PG
CATEGORY: Historical AU.
DISCLAIMER: I don't know the people involved. Everything is the product of my imagination. Alexander and Hephaestion belong to History and each other but I would not mind sharing my life with the blue-eyed man.
My mother tongue is Spanish and I work without a Beta so all the mistakes are mine.
FEEDBACK: Comments are love! Any kind will help me to improve my writing or leave it forever.
The young brunette repeated his mantra once and again in his head and his heart repeated it at the same time but with much more conviction. He knew his love was a lost cause but it did not matter; his life went around the blonde prince's life who had not even registered his existence despite the three years spent together.
He did only receive orders from him and sometimes, rarely, mumbled thanks were so weakly uttered that they could have passed unnoticed. More than once, the brunette had to repeat his name to the prince who had never cared to learn it. He was invisible to him and despite telling himself that it did not matter, deep down in his heart, he suffered the young prince's lack of recognition.
The young brunette knew his prince so well that he could almost anticipate most of Alexander's needs and desires so it was not strange for him to be where and when his prince needed him.
The rest of Alexander's companions could not understand how Alexander could ignore such beauty. It was not common to find beauty and intelligence in one body but this servant seemed to have mastered both virtues. He was intelligent; he was quick at thinking and faster than many in looking for and finding solutions. His knowledge was not only practical; he could read, write, and even quote many great thinkers' teaching with the modesty of the ones who had learnt it well.
There was no arrogance in his speech, just logical and practical pieces of advice. However, the prince did not acknowledge the young servant at all; in fact, the young brunette had to repeat his words whenever he talked to the prince and the blonde youth did not even look at him to thank him for the service.
"Why do you do that, Alexander?" Ptolemy asked him one day.
"Why do I do what?" he asked while munching a red apple that had miraculously appeared by his right elbow.
"Ignore Hephaestion so openly," he said.
"Who is Hephaestion?" Alexander asked seriously.
"Really? Don't you ever know his name?" Ptolemy asked surprised and angry at the same time.
"No. Who is he?"
"The young servant who has been your right hand for the last three years? " Ptolemy asked, almost mocking him.
"My right hand? You are my right hand, my brother" Alexander replied.
"Fine, just let me ask you a question"
Alexander nodded while biting the juicy red apple again.
"What are you eating and where did you get it from?" Ptolemy asked him.
"A very delicious apple and I took it from the bowl as usual" Alexander replied.
"Do you see a bowl on the table, because I don't?" the elder blonde asked.
Alexander looked around and saw neither a bowl nor a tray at all. He felt puzzled and looked at Ptolemy with confusion in his mismatched eyes.
"Hephaestion left it for you; he seems to anticipate your needs. You always eat something sweet after a long practice," he said.
Alexander realized that he had never suspected a thing but now that Ptolemy had mentioned it; he would try to pay more attention. This Hephaestion seemed to know him well.
Alexander got involved in his many duties and forgot everything about his earlier conversation with Ptolemy. He was so deeply concentrated on his scroll that he did not see Hephaestion leaving a tray with hot food on a nearby table as well as a light blanket over the back of his chair.
Alexander lifted his head when he heard his door chamber screech and then discovered the new things that had been left for his comfort. After eating heartily, he dozed off for a while. When he woke up, the tray had disappeared and the blanket was over his shoulders.
His scrolls had been put aside, his quills cleaned and his desk tidied up.
He stood up and walked towards the kitchen to ask about the mysterious and efficient servant. The cook saw him enter and immediately poured a goblet of warm milk.
"Can't you sleep, pet?" Lena asked lovingly.
"I dozed off for a while" he replied.
"I know. Hephaestion told me you might come for something warm when you woke up" she said and offered the already prepared goblet.
"How did he know? I did not know I wanted this myself until now"
"I don't know, pet, but he always surprises me. He works in silence, in the dark, efficiently and so fast that I imagine he faints as soon as he reaches his bed," Lena added.
"Maybe I can go and check in the quarters," Alexander said.
"I have never seen him there, my prince," another boy said.
"Oh, so he has a family" Alexander added.
No, my prince. His parents died when he was ten and your father allowed him to take care of the horses as that was his father's job. In fact, his father was the best horse breeder I have ever heard about. He was also a handsome man and that is why Hephaestion is such a beauty" the boy said and blushed immediately.
"Really?" Alexander said.
"Pet, where are your eyes? Even though you like girls, you cannot deny that he has handsome features and the most amazing cerulean eyes. It is a pity that he is always hiding," she added.
"Maybe he has a girlfriend," Alexander said.
"No, my prince; he doesn't like women" the boy explained.
"How do you know that? Has he dared to touch you or made a dirty proposal?" he immediately asked.
"No, never! He is too honourable to ask or do something like that but I have heard some Army men asking him for sexual favours in exchange for a better situation. However, he has always replied that his heart belongs to one man only and that it will remain like that until his death."
Alexander remained in silence; he thought that it would be wonderful to feel such deep love for someone; something he had not experienced yet.
"Poor boy, that love does not make him any good" the cook said with regret.
Alexander looked at her and asked how she knew about the servant's unhappiness.
"I think someone who is so much in love with someone else should be happier. However, he looks gloomy almost all the time, especially when he leaves the palace at night"
"Maybe his love has a family or a partner"
"No, his love is unrequited. The man he loves doesn't even know he exists" Lena said.
"So his love is stupid. He is wasting his time," Alexander added.
"Hephaestion once confessed that he wasn't worthy of that man's love but that he could not stop loving him," the boy said.
"So this Hephaestion isn't as smart as Ptolemy thinks he is if he goes on torturing himself by loving someone who doesn't love him back" Alexander replied and then left the kitchen, still drinking from his goblet and thinking about the dichotomy of that Hephaestion's behaviour.
The next day Alexander decided to pay more attention to that servant and, for the first time, realized how many things that young man did to make his life easier.
Hephaestion sensed a change of attitude, felt very nervous, and wondered what he had done differently to get the prince's attention.
He behaved as he did his best, being invisible and working in the dark. Unfortunately, no matter how hard he tried to remain unnoticed, he saw the prince everywhere and whenever he was about to ask for him, the young prince materialized by his side.
Hephaestion was rubbing the sweat off one of the king's horses when he heard someone clearing his throat. He immediately knew who it was so he stopped his duty and turned around. He cast down his eyes and kept his hands behind his back.
"Is there anything you need, my prince?" Hephaestion asked and Alexander, for the first time, realized the baritone cadence of the servant's voice.
"Not really; I was wondering where you were. There was no towel ready after my practice" Alexander lied.
"I am so sorry, my prince. I did not know you were practising twice in the day," Hephaestion said while lowering to his knees, ready to receive the punishment he deserved. However, his knees never reached the floor because the prince grabbed him by his arm to stop him.
"Hephaestion, I won't punish you," the prince said.
The young man trembled strongly. He felt his arm on fire where the prince's hand was still touching him.
"Look at me …, please," Alexander asked him.
Hephaestion lifted his head and eyes but he did not dare to look at him directly into the mismatched eyes.
"Please … for me?" Alexander asked again.
Hephaestion immediately lifted his gaze and stared at the young blonde standing so close to him. The prince gasped in astonishment.
"Please, forgive me, my prince. I know I am too dirty and awful to your eyes. Please, let me clean a bit so I can be in your presence" Hephaestion begged and his tone of voice was so low and filled with embarrassment that made Alexander think what he had ever done to deserve this man's servitude.
"There is nothing to forgive or to be embarrassed for. And to be fair, I didn't need that towel as I did not practice in the afternoon" Alexander said.
Hephaestion remained in silence; his eyes cast down once again.
"Don't you want to know why I did and said that?" Alexander curiously asked.
"It is not my business, sire. Apart from that, I am just a servant and I do not have the right to ask my prince about his actions," he stated.
"Well, I am going to tell you anyway. I did it because I wanted to see your reaction. I really wanted to know what you would do when you could not control everything," Alexander said.
Hephaestion remained in silence but Alexander could see how the teen paled and started to wring his hands nervously.
Alexander charged against him, asking again.
"Do you like having control over everything? Don't you think your actions may annoy me? Your silence annoys me more. Don't you have anything to say? Show me your intelligence because, up to now, I have not seen any brilliant explanation coming out of your lips" Alexander did not know why he was scolding the poor servant. He had just come to thank him but his servile attitude had annoyed him more than he had expected.
"Speak!" Alexander demanded and he slapped Hephaestion hard to get a reaction. The young man set a hand over the slapped cheek, fell to his knees and set his forehead on the floor.
"I am sorry, sir. I will never do anything you don't tell me but, please, don't throw me away; let me stay near to serve you" Hephaestion begged him.
Alexander got even angrier at his response so he grabbed the man's head by his long tresses and pushed him up and shouted,
"Look at me and understand me for once, I don't want you in my service, I don't want you to tend my horses. I don't want you to talk to me, I don't want you to be near me so you'd better run and fast … now," he stated loud and clear, and Hephaestion did not have any other choice than to do what he had been commanded.
Fat tears fell from his cerulean eyes and ran along his still dirty cheeks but he continued running until he reached the well. He let himself fall on his back and then after leaning against the well walls, he cried bitter tears of loneliness and despair.
"What would I do now? I was born to serve him. What is my purpose in life if he does not allow me to be near him?" Hephaestion wondered while some more tears rolled down his face.
Hephaestion decided to ask for an audience with the king and he would surely find him another position in the palace.
Philip remembered the boy quite well; he was smart, efficient and handsome and his father had been an acquaintance. He immediately reassigned him with the horses and then he was free to do any chores he liked inside or outside the palace. Philip also suggested that he could become a page to any of the companions and maybe, become a soldier.
Hephaestion, despite his sadness, thanked the king for offering him so many options and promised him that he would never let him down.
Philip looked at him and said,
"I don't understand why my son is so mad at you but as the Black General says one man's trash can be another man's treasure. You can also sleep and live in the barracks but take into account that my son visits them quite frequently" he assured him.
Hephaestion thanked him once again and promised him not to be in the barracks if Alexander was nearby.
Therefore, Hephaestion's new life began and so did Alexander's. The young prince learnt quite quickly that Hephaestion's service had been more than helpful and efficient. No longer were near him clean towels, red juicy apples or pitches with fresh cold water after a long practice. His dirty chitons had started to accumulate and he did not know who to ask to get them cleaned. He knew that Lena the cook would tell him everything he needed, however, he would have to wear the same dirty chiton he had worn the day before.
He entered the kitchen calling for Lena but there was no response. However, there was a young man there who tensed his back immediately as soon as he heard the prince's voice. He did not turn around at all and continued preparing a tray with food. At that moment, Alexander realized that he had not had his mid-morning snack and his stomach rumbled loudly. He looked at the young man again and asked him why he did not answer him. The man turned around and told him he had prohibited him to talk to him.
Alexander looked with surprise at the young man standing there and realized that he was Hephaestion. He had not recognized him because he was wearing a page uniform and his long hair was tied in a low ponytail.
The young man hurried his movements and left the kitchen carrying the tray. Alexander's curiosity was bigger than his anger so he followed the page and saw him knocking at Ptolemy's room and waiting outside. The older blonde took the tray and thanked Hephaestion many times for bringing him his lunch. The brunette asked for the man's dirty clothes to wash. Alexander felt angrier than before; his friend Ptolemy, whom the prince considered his brother, had taken that traitor under his protection.
However, a moment later, Alexander understood many situations at the same time; Hephaestion had only asked for forgiveness and probably had not defended due to his deep loyalty to the king. Alexander had not seen that at that moment, treated him like scum and ruined everything for both of them. In fact, Alexander had lost more than Hephaestion and the brunette would now know how to serve a kind and thankful master felt.
The following days were very hard for the prince; he had to do many things for himself because he had not dared to ask for a personal page. He knew that if he did that, he would have to explain to his father why he had shown such animosity against Hephaestion. It was also difficult not to envy Ptolemy who was enjoying the benefits of having Hephaestion and his amazing skills and abilities.
The elder blonde had not said a word about Hephaestion to Alexander but the prince had heard many of the companions congratulating him on his new page and Alexander had to hide his despair.
One evening, Cleitus was walking by with the prince when he saw Hephaestion coming toward them. However, seconds later, the brunette was anywhere near them. Cleitus was confused and thought he might have mistaken Hephaestion with another page, something he could not fully believe because the brunette was one of the most handsome men there.
The same situation occurred that night. Many of the companions were having their dinner together and Ptolemy was sitting between Cleitus and Alexander. He saw Hephaestion entering the chamber, carrying a tray with food but then, he could no longer see him. Another page told something in Ptolemy's ear and he huffed, nodding.
"Is there something that worries you, Ptolemy?" Cleitus asked.
"Yes. My new page Hephaestion does not want to enter the chamber to serve my dinner because our prince has prohibited him to be near him"
"What?" Cleitus asked, feeling quite surprised.
"Hephaestion cannot speak, look, assist or be near Alexander and, as I am sitting next to our prince, he does not want to be hit again for violating his orders," Ptolemy explained.
"Who hit whom?" Alexander, who had just joined the conversation, asked.
"Nothing to worry about, Alexander" Ptolemy said, trying to minimize the situation.
"You well know I do not tolerate unjustified fights or punishments so tell me the truth," Alexander demanded.
"Well, you hit Hephaestion and he doesn't want to enter because you are here and he doesn't want to annoy you again" Ptolemy explained.
"But, isn't he your page?" Alexander asked, trying to hide his former reaction.
"Yes, but he still respects you as his prince; he would never go against one of your orders. That is why he asked me to let him work in the kitchen while you are here," Ptolemy explained and continued eating.
Alexander felt very bad and did not give any reply but he remained quiet for the rest of the dinner.
"Now I understand Hephaestion's disappearances whenever Alexander is near or why Bucephalus is clean but his hair does not shine as it used to do," Cleitus said aloud.
Moving Ptolemy backwards, Cleitus touched Alexander's arm to get his attention.
"Yes, Cleitus?" he asked.
"There are many suspicious stains in your chiton, Alexander. That is disgusting and that would not happen if Hephaestion were at your service. You took a very bad decision, boy" Cleitus said and then laughed loudly.
Alexander was so embarrassed that he left the room, leaving his food untouched. However, he refused not to have dinner so he entered the kitchen to find Hephaestion washing the dishes.
"Is there someone to prepare me a tray with food?" Alexander asked.
Hephaestion remained in silence.
"Answer Me," the prince commanded.
"No, sire" Hephaestion replied.
"So, you prepare it" he demanded again.
Hephaestion dried his hands, took a tray and waited.
"What are you waiting for?" Alexander asked.
"For you to tell me what you want, sire" he replied.
"You already know what I like," Alexander said.
"Yes, but you told me never to think I know you better than yourself, sire" the page replied.
Alexander's patience was wearing thin but had to recognize that the whole situation was his fault and no one else's.
"Give me that tray," Alexander said and when Hephaestion handed him the tray, Alexander touched his fingers and a shock of electricity ran all along the prince's arm. He immediately put some random food on the tray and practically ran away from there.
Hephaestion took a deep breath until his heart was calmer. Despite being mistreated by Alexander, Hephaestion could not stop loving him but he would not go against his rules either.
Time went by and Alexander learnt to accept his mistakes as regards Hephaestion and tried not to put the young page in any strenuous situation.
Hephaestion was always alert and had managed to avoid Alexander for a whole month; the prince was curious and wanted to know how Hephaestion had managed to do that. Therefore, Alexander took up a new hobby, Hephaestion's watching and he supposed that, in that way, he would discover how Hephaestion managed to be always one step ahead in order to avoid him.
Ptolemy realized what Alexander was trying to do and he felt happy, those two deserved a second chance. It was also funny seeing them, the brunette trying to avoid the blonde while the prince tried to catch the page.
The game continued for several months and, despite Alexander's efforts, he had not been closer to catching Hephaestion, who had become a master at disappearing in question of seconds.
Ptolemy, Cleitus and Perdicas had discovered Alexander's game and did up to the impossible to get them closer but they had not succeeded. None of them had thought that hunt could be the turning point in that game.
The young companions organized a boar hunt to celebrate the spring solstice; it was also a good excuse to make some sacrifices to Aphrodite to get her good favour.
Hephaestion spoke his concern about going with Ptolemy as Alexander was going to take part in the hunt too. However, the elder blonde told his page that he had already arranged everything so they would not cross paths during the three-day event. Hephaestion accepted and organized all the things that might need during the short trip.
Alexander was watching Hephaestion from a distance when he heard Cleitus's comment,
"He would be a good acquisition for your army, my prince"
"He is not a companion, just a servant" Alexander replied.
"He is a page and your father had already offered him a position in the Army"
"Really?" he asked a bit surprised because he did not have any idea of that offer.
"Yes but he feels he is not worthy of wearing the Macedonian uniform in battle" Cleitus explained.
"He is probably a coward," Alexander said.
"Not at all. I have been training him and he is deadly with a sword" he said proudly.
"So, if he is so good, why didn't he join the Army?" Alexander asked.
"Because being in the Army would imply violating many of the commands you have imposed on him," Cleitus explained seriously.
Alexander remained in silence as Cleitus went away, knowing that he might have put some doubts in Alexander's thinking as regards Hephaestion.
When the hunt began, Hephaestion had already prepared everything Ptolemy might need and left everything at hand. He had also helped other pages to tend the horses except for Bucephalus even though the big black beast neighed loudly whenever Hephaestion was near, recognizing his former caretaker.
Cleitus invited Hephaestion to take part in the hunt. The brunette hesitated for a while but finally accepted on one condition, he would join them when half an hour had already passed by so he did not cross paths with Alexander. Cleitus accepted his reason and let Ptolemy know the good news.
Everybody left on the horses and with their dogs; only one dog remained inside the pen, she looked like more than a she-wolf and it was Hephaestion's only possession.
Hephaestion took Luna with him and joined the chase. An hour later, he heard the barking of the hunting dogs and the shouts of the men. Hephaestion decided to let Luna rest for a little while and sat on a boulder. Luna sniffed the air and then her ears perked up at a sound she could only hear. Hephaestion looked at her but she did not move so the young page continued munching his apple.
A minute later, Luna stood up, lifted her head towards the wind and suddenly began to run. Hephaestion called her name but, for the first time, she did not obey her master. That alerted Hephaestion who began to run after her. A cold shiver travelled along his spine and fear settled in his heart; he did not want to have any negative thoughts but Luna only reacted like that whenever Bucephalus "called" for her.
Hephaestion was running fast after Luna when he saw what he did not want to see; Bucephalus was alone but moving his head towards something on the floor. Alexander was on a patch of mud and dirty water; an arrow had pierced his right shoulder, and Alexander seemed to be unconscious due to the pain or a hit to his head.
Hephaestion was about to kneel by his side, forgetting about all Alexander's prohibitions when he heard the sound of broken twigs behind him. He slowly unshed his sword and then turned around quickly, his sword going through the man's chest and slitting the second man's stomach open. It looked like an ambush but he did not want to risk the prince's life any longer so he commanded Luna to look for Ptolemy while he took Alexander carefully in his arms and then onto Bucephalus.
After that, Hephaestion got on Bucephalus and put Alexander's against the horse's body so he could hug him against his chest while riding back to the improvised camp.
Ptolemy saw Luna alone and knew something was wrong. She started to howl towards the other side. At that moment, the rest of the companions realized that Alexander was no longer with them so Perdicas and other companions took care of the boar while Ptolemy and Cleitus followed Luna.
They met Hephaestion halfway; he was carefully riding with Alexander in his arms while he came in and out of consciousness. Ptolemy went back to tell the others and organize the departure while Cleitus accompanied Hephaestion back to the palace. He then rode ahead to alert the king and the doctor so that when Hephaestion arrived, everything would be ready. Cleitus took Alexander from Hephaestion's arms and ran inside the palace where Doctor Phillip was already waiting for them.
He removed the improvised dressing. After all, he had to clean the wound quite thoroughly because he was afraid of infection. However, when he removed the poultice of herbs, he breathed calmly; someone knew very well how to treat that kind of wound.
Meanwhile, Hephaestion retreated to Ptolemy's chamber, put everything in order and intended to go back to the barracks to look for Luna to feed her and give her a treat.
On his way there, Bucephalus neighed loudly, calling for him. Hephaestion decided to tend to him and wondered that one more violation of Alexander's rules would not affect his future punishment.
When Bucephalus was calm, cleaned and fed, Hephaestion was exhausted, not only physically but also emotionally. He decided to sit by the horse for a moment or two before going back to the barracks. Luna got closer, settled by his side and both fell asleep.
An hour or so had gone by when Hephaestion listened to a commotion outside; someone was shouting and so he awoke properly because he realized that someone was calling out his name. Hephaestion left the stable and found Cleitus shouting his name repeatedly.
"There you are, Alexander is asking for you," he said.
"By Zeus, he is going to throw me out of Macedon this time," he said to Cleitus who did not say a word, as he did not want to ruin the surprise.
Hephaestion entered the chamber and remained by the door. Alexander asked the people there to leave them alone and then asked the page to get closer. The young prince could see that Hephaestion was trembling with fear and he felt more mortified than before.
"Hephaestion, I was calling you," Alexander said in a very low voice.
"I was tending Bucephalus; he was hot and dirty and I could not leave him like that so add that to my punishment, sire" Hephaestion confessed, whispering.
"No one is going to punish you; in fact, I am the one who should get a punishment," Alexander said.
Hephaestion looked like a marble statue, all frozen and pale, so Alexander decided to go on speaking.
"I have to thank you for saving my life; your quick reaction and treatment of my wound are what will speed my recovery," Alexander said and waited for Hephaestion's reply.
"Please. Answer me. If you don't talk to me, I cannot go on speaking," Alexander almost begged.
"But, my prince, you told me …." Hephaestion was suddenly interrupted.
"Those were a bunch of stupid lies told by an insecure boy, this accident of today had put my life into perspective and I have to thank you for teaching me that. I'd be honoured if you can talk to me and teach me all those useful things you know"
"I could teach you very few things; Master Aristotle is your tutor, in my case, life was my teacher and I learnt the hard way"
"But that is what makes you so smart and I was blind to recognize how worthy your help was. Only when I rejected you, I learnt how many things you did for me and how ungrateful I had been these past four years. I'd appreciate it if you could join…"
"No, no, no; from now on Hephaestion will be part of my Army. I would suggest the cavalry section, as you are a true horse whisperer. I have also come to thank you for saving my son's life and to ask how you were feeling after killing those two men," King Phillip asked.
Alexander turned around to look at Hephaestion in the eyes and asked,
"Did you kill two men on my behalf?"
"Yes, my prince; they were the ones who had ambushed you," Hephaestion said and blushed. Then he turned to reply to the king,
"I am honoured my king with your offer. Do you think I am ready for that position? I am just scum," Hephaestion said and Alexander felt his heart break because he had been the one to say that to him.
"Who said that to you? You are the son of my good friend Amyntoros, the horse master of this kingdom since I have memory" the king quickly replied.
"It doesn't matter now, my king; it is in the past" Hephaestion said and from the corner of his eye, he saw Alexander looking extremely embarrassed and guilty.
"I hope you two can clear the bad air between you. I need you both in my Army" the king said and left Alexander's chamber.
"So Hephaestion, could you please forgive me?" Alexander asked.
"There's nothing to forgive, sire. I will always follow your orders even if I don't like them," he stated.
"You have already shown me your concept of loyalty and I must recognize that it is much deeper and more sincere than mine"
Hephaestion remained in silence so Alexander asked again,
"So, are we brothers in arms from now on?" he said while outstretching his arm.
Hephaestion accepted and returned the gesture and, once again, that cold and hot shiver travelled along their arms.
Little by little, Hephaestion learnt not to be so suspicious about his prince's behaviour and Alexander learnt to have a person by his side who was not thinking about what he could get from the future heir but what he could offer to make Alexander's life easier.
Hephaestion started to spend more time and share more moments by Alexander's side and he learnt to love his prince from a different point of view, long gone was the perfect boy who was excellent in everything he did. Hephaestion learnt to discover the young man behind the prince, a human being with many virtues and many flaws, as well.
It was a time of mutual learning and Alexander had to accept that Hephaestion was better in some areas where the prince used to be at the top.
Alexander looked at Hephaestion through different eyes and accepted that new knowledge; until one day, he saw something that brought pain, anxiety and jealousy to his heart.
Cleitus had a hand on Hephaestion's shoulder while the other was touching a lock of long brown hair. They were quite close to each other and Hephaestion's laughter sounded loud and funny.
A year had gone by since Alexander's ambush and he had finally realized that Hephaestion meant a lot to him, more than a simple friend. He was so surprised to find that feeling inside his heart that he stopped his movements and remained there unmoving.
Hephaestion, whose love for the prince had grown even more, saw Alexander's reaction. He left Cleitus alone and ran to his prince to ask him what his problem was. Alexander looked at him, with surprise in his eyes and then perplexity invaded his mind.
"Nothing; I have just realized something and I cannot believe that I have not seen the signs before now" Alexander replied.
"All right, if you are feeling good, I will return to my conversation with Cleitus" Hephaestion replied and started to walk back where the Black General was still waiting for him.
"Please, don't go!" Alexander asked him. That plea made Hephaestion turn around to hear what the prince needed to say.
"It has dawned on me that I am falling in love," Alexander said in such a low voice that Hephaestion thought he was speaking more to himself than to him.
"Aren't you going to ask me the name of my beloved?" the prince asked.
"I don't think I have the right to ask you who you love," Hephaestion said calmly while he felt his heart shrink inside his chest.
"Of course, you have the right because I … I love … I love you, Hephaestion" Alexander finally dared to say and moved closer to the astonished brunette who was looking back at Alexander with tears in his cyan eyes.
"Do my feelings for you disgust you that much?" Alexander asked and his tone of voice revealed his pain and uncertainty.
"No; on the contrary, they honour me," Hephaestion said.
"So, why are you crying?" Alexander asked and dried some tear tracks with the pad of his fingers.
"Because never in my whole life, I thought you could love me as I love you" Hephaestion assured him.
"Is it true? Do you love me, Hephaestion?" Alexander asked while his mismatched eyes showed the happiness in his heart.
"Yes, I do, since the beginning of my life," Hephaestion confessed.
"Will you stay with me by my side?" Alexander asked him while he took the brunette's hands in his.
"Always, until the last star dies" Hephaestion promised, and so Alexander sealed that promise with their first kiss.