Yeah, under the boardwalk, down by the sea, yeah

On a blanket with my baby is where I'll be…

Pt 1

Somehow it was already August. Olivia always seemed to have all these plans in her mind for the summer with Noah. But as usual, one thing often turned into another, a case, someone was sick, life always had a way of making those plans impossible. So two days ago when she realized it was about to be August 1st, she called Fin and told him she was taking a week off and he was in charge.

She'd packed up her things and Noah's piled them in her SUV and left the city behind. She couldn't remember the last time she took a vacation but boy this was long overdue. She was now sitting out on the beach, the warm sun radiating off her skin and she felt so at peace. They'd been here less than 24 hours but she knew it was exactly what she had needed, Noah too. Slipping her shades onto her head, she smiled at her son who was taking a mini surfing lesson in the water. She laughs when he slips and falls into the water, popping up again, shaking his curls out of his face. Looking up, he waves at his Mom and laughs, "Did you see that?"

She chuckles again and yells back, "I saw! Keep trying! You'll get it."

Noah waves again and turns his attention back to Kevin, his instructor, determined to get this. He may not be her biological son but he is just as stubborn as she is and will never give up. She sighs, resting her head in her hand, thinking about how grateful she is that she was given this second chance. Truth be told after Elliot left she never thought she could feel happiness again. And then once she'd been kidnapped and everything she thought she knew seemed to vanish, she worried she'd never smile again.

But then came Noah and her life suddenly had meaning again. She realized watching her son now that the last two years had been a bit of a blur. Since her former Partner had returned, she'd been living in between two worlds, her life before Noah and her life after. Elliot had only met the boy once though both her son and her friend had asked about the other, hoping to get to know one another, she hadn't been able to take the plunge just yet. If she was really honest with herself, she'd say it was because she was terrified to lose Elliot again.

But for some reason, no matter how much she tried to keep him away, he kept showing up in the most unlikely of places. "Liv?"

Her breath caught in her throat and she closes her eyes for a moment. There is no way he could be here. Right? She hadn't told him where she was going or even that she was heading out of town. They'd been playing phone tag for the better part of the last month and only had met for a quick lunch after the fourth to catch up. There was no way the Universe had just put him in her path again…

And yet…

As she turned, she saw him in all his glory. God help her. If she wasn't screwed before, she sure as hell was now. He had just emerged from the water, salt water dripping off his chiseled chest. How was it that he was more fit than he was years ago? He had on a loose-fitting pair of swim shorts that hung low on his hips, showing off the deep V of his muscles and the line of hair that led straight to his -

She gulped and shook the thought out of her head as he approached her. "It is you! Hey!"

Anxiously, she slipped her sunglasses back over her eyes hoping to shield the look of pure lust her eyes no doubt showed. As he got closer, she realized he was growing out his beard again, a feature that had surprised her at first since in all the years she'd known him he was usually clean-shaven. Occasionally there was the five o'clock shadow after a 3-day case but the full salt and pepper beard was new. And if she was honest, sexy as all hell.

Trying to keep her composure, she pulled at the white beach cover up feeling very exposed. She wore a navy blue one-piece, long gone were the days of bikinis. William Lewis sure put a stop to that. But she had felt somewhat good this morning slipping it on over her curves, thinking she looked damn good for her age. Yet now next to her partner and the man she'd been in love with for over two decades, she felt like a teenage girl terrified to show herself off to her crush.

"Elliot…h-hi". Adjusting the coverup along her thighs she cleared her throat and asked, "What are you doing here?"

He smiles that smile that makes her weak in the knees and she has to clench her legs together to keep from squirming. "Took the week to be with the kids. We're staying at my Mom's old place."

Inwardly she cringes realizing she completely forgot Bernie had a place here on LBI. Trying to play it cool she nods, "Oh. That's right. I-I didn't think she still had it now that she was in the city."

Elliot shrugs, water still dripping off his body but he had no towel here to dry off. "She couldn't bear to give it up so we decided to rent it out in the off-season. The older kids have come down a few times already. And I decided it was time we all stayed for a bit."

She smiles, knowing it's exactly what they all need. Especially him. "That's great El. I'm sure the kids are thrilled to have some time with you."

"Yeah. We all needed it." He paused and looked out at the water, "What about you? I saw Noah while I was swimming and knew you couldn't be far off. Though to be honest, I assumed it was my imagination playing tricks on me again."

She frowned, subconsciously reaching for an extra towel to hand him, "What do you mean?"

The throaty laugh that escapes his throat makes her shiver despite the nearly ninety-degree temperature here. When he looks back at her, she melts further into the seat because he is looking at her in a way that makes her feel like he sees her as much more than a friend.

Wiping his chest off slightly, he rests the towel on his shoulders and sighs, "Liv, I've been seeing you everywhere I go for the last decade. But then I blink and you're gone…"

Her heart starts beating a little faster and she whispers a pained response before she can stop herself, "I've been here all along El…right where you left me."

His cheeks redden slightly and he falls back on his heels feeling like she punched him in the gut, and in a way…she did. "Listen, Liv, I-"

"Mom! Mom! Did you see it? I got the wave that time! I stayed up for a whole minute without falling!"

Olivia snapped out of her daze and guilt washes over her, guilt over what she said and guilt for missing such a big moment for her son. Why did she always feel like she was being pulled in two different directions, not able to make everyone happy? "Oh, I-I was-"

But Noah has already moved on to more pressing matters like the man standing beside them. "Elliot?"

Elliot smiles, once again caught up in how good it is to see Olivia with her son. The one thing she'd always wanted. But guilt washed over him too. Guilt for leaving her, for missing out on all these years when this boy was growing up. He couldn't change the past, but maybe this was his chance to start changing their future. "Uh, yeah. Hey, Noah. Nice to see you again! You looked great out there. A natural!"

"Do you surf?" Noah asks excitedly, "Can you show me? Kevin had to leave but I don't want to stop."

"Actually, I do. I'm not great at it. My son Eli is much better than I am though. He was talking about renting some boards tomorrow. Maybe we could meet up?" He turns to look at Olivia who seems more than a bit caught off guard and if he is honest, worried and he realizes he should have asked her permission first, "That is…if it's okay with your Mom of course."

Noah whips around to look at his Mom, "That would be so cool! Please, Mom? Please?"

"Well…I don't want to interrupt any family time and-"

"But you are family." It isn't Elliot's voice though that says it, it's his daughter Kathleen.

She smiles nervously, holding her son closer, "Hey, Kathleen."

The beautiful blonde smiles and Olivia can see so much of her Mother that for a moment her heart stops. It's almost like he is standing there with his wife. The woman he belonged with and all those worries she'd felt for so long sunk deeper into her bones. "Maureen went into a full spiral mode when she didn't see Dad in the water so she sent us all on a wild goose chase searching for him." She looked over at her Dad and smiled. "Seems like he was in good hands though."

"Noah and I were just talking about maybe surfing tomorrow with Eli. I'll ask Dickie and the twins too. I know you girls have plans of your own." Elliot explained.

"Oh yeah, that will be fun!" She turned back to Olivia and Noah, "And hey, Liv you should come with us! We're doing a spa day. Lord knows Captain of the Manhattan SVU deserves a little pampering."

"Yeah, Mom! That sounds great!" Noah said with a smile, "You should go with the girls and let me hang out with the guys."

With the guys, she knew her son longed for that. A Father figure, brothers. He'd almost had it with Peter but… "Liv?"

She realized she was in her own head again and she looked over at Elliot and Kathleen who were waiting for a response, "Well…I gu-guess that could be okay?"

"Great!" Kathleen said, the wheels already turning in her head, "Can you meet us at Grandma's around ten? Then we'll head out. Noah can stay with the guys and they can surf around here." She paused, "Oh! And, we're doing a barbeque tomorrow night at the house. You two should come."

Even more, time spent with the Stablers, her heart was pounding a mile a minute but she knew Noah would never let her get out of this. And the look on Kathleen and Elliot's faces told her they weren't going to take no for an answer anyway. Chewing on her lip she eyed the man standing beside her, "Again I don't want to-"

"Don't even go there." Elliot said with a shake of his head, "We always have enough food for a small army. You're more than welcome to come. Plus, we've been trying to get the families together since Christmas. Seems like the Universe finally got it right and we can make it happen." She still looked skeptical and he smiled, sliding his hands into his pockets, "Come on Liv…once we go back to the city we'll both get wrapped up in work again. Isn't this the perfect time to do it?"

"Yeah come on Mom…" Noah said with a little pout, "You said we could do whatever I wanted this week and I want to go over to Elliot's…"

Of course, he did she thought. Two meetings and he was already under his spell. With a heavy sigh, she ran her fingers through Noah's curls and smiled, "Okay…yeah. We-we can do that." She looked over at Elliot, "Can we bring anything?"

"Nope." He said with a shake of his head, "Trust me, my Mom and I got enough food for everyone. You don't need to bring anything." She still looked hesitant and he smiled once more, giving her a little shrug and whispered, "Just come."

She shivered slightly again and nodded, "Yeah. We'll…we'll be there."

"Great." Kathleen looked at Noah, realizing her Dad and Olivia needed a moment alone, "Wanna come with me and grab a lemonade kid? Hot out here."

Noah looked at his Mom, "Can I?"

Olivia reached for her wallet and handed it over to him, "Sure. Go on."

Elliot gave his daughter a thankful smile and then approached Olivia. She was standing now, the white coverup slightly see-through and he could see the tight bathing suit underneath. His body reacted instantly, his cock twitching, his hands clenching at his sides. The front dipped at her chest, pushing her full breasts up and he knew he'd give just about anything to see what was underneath. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

He jumped slightly and looked over at her, "Hm?"

She frowned and crossed her arms over her chest, "You're staring."

He smiled and felt a little bolder than usual. Reaching out, he brushed her hair behind her ear and whispered, "Can you blame me?"

Her cheeks flushed and she looked down, "Elliot…"

"Wanna swim?" He asked pointing behind him, "It is hot out here…but I'm not sure lemonade will cool me down."

She could feel the sweat trickling down her back but she wasn't taking this coverup, wasn't bearing her body in front of him, "I'm fine, thanks."

He laughed and shook his head, "Always the stubborn one…"

She huffed softly, "Listen…Elliot-"

"Oh no, don't try and get out of tomorrow." He said quickly, "You'll break Kathleen's heart and Noah's."

"That's what I'm afraid of…" She mumbled under her breath.

He knew she didn't think he had heard it but he did. But as their kids approached again, he knew now wasn't the time to push it, "Please say you'll come?"

She cleared her throat and looked at him quickly, "I said I will, so I will."

He smiled, letting it go for now, "Okay…good."

Noah held out a cup for her, "Here Mom, got one for you too."

"Thanks, sweetie." She kissed the top of his head and started to gather their stuff, "Okay, we should probably head back to the house. We have early dinner reservations so we can catch that movie you wanted to see."

Noah nodded, "Okay." He turned to Kathleen and Elliot, "We'll see you tomorrow?"

Elliot gave him a little nod, "That you will kid."

"Great." He helped his Mom pick up their items and he waved at Kathleen, "Bye Kathleen. See you tomorrow."

Olivia took her son's hand, smiled, and walked towards the parking lot, needing a little space between them all. From their spot on the beach, Kathleen handed a cup to her Father, "Was it my imagination, or was she blushing?"

He laughed and looked over at her, "Kathleen…do me a favor." She looked at him innocently, twirling the straw in her drink, "Be nice tomorrow. Don't…push her too hard? This is all…a lot. I have a lot of shit I need to make up for."

"Oh. I know." She said with a nod, "But…tomorrow is a good start. Dinner…a few drinks and she'll be relaxed from the spa. Maybe you can take her for a little walk at sunset…talk a little…romance her…"

Elliot hung his head and turned to walk away from him, "Okay…we're done with this conversation."

"Dad, wait." He paused and slowly turned to her, "You know that…we're okay with it, right?" He just stared at her, a sadness falling over his face, "You dating I mean. We want you to be happy. And we know…especially me, Maureen, Dickie, and Lizzie…we know that Olivia means the world to you. She always did."

Elliot frowned and took another step toward her, "You don't mind?" Kathleen shook her head, "I just…I mean you know that I loved your Mother. I mean I still do. I always did."

"I know." She said with a nod, "But you loved someone else too." His eyes went wide, "But you were faithful to Mom. You stayed for our family. You did what you needed to do for us." Slowly, she approached him, put her hand on his arm, and whispered, "But now it's time for you to do what's best for you. And if it's going to be anyone…we all want it to be Olivia." With a little smile, she whispered, "To be fair…most of the time we like her better than you anyway."

He knew she was teasing but he laughed, "Kathleen…"

She cocked her head back down the beach, "Come on. Mo's probably sent out a full search party at this point. Let's not give her a heart attack…"

He sighed and looked back towards the parking lot just in time to see Olivia and Noah beginning to back the car out. He just hoped they showed up tomorrow…

The following morning, Olivia felt like she hadn't slept a wink. Quite frankly, she hadn't. She was exhausted. She'd spent the night tossing and turning worrying about the day ahead of her. And the little she did sleep, she dreamed of Elliot pinning her against some wall, that beard of his tickling her, moving lower and lower, making her feel things she never dreamed she'd feel, especially from her partner. Now she was in the driveway outside of Bernie's house, Noah was already running up the front path and she felt like she couldn't move.

Her mind was spinning and she leaned forward, pressing her forehead into the steering wheel. A moment later, she jumped when she heard a tapping on the window. Turning, she saw Elliot standing there, a tray of coffee in his hands, "Morning."

She took a deep breath, climbed out of the car, and tried to smile at him, adjusting her white maxi dress with little pink accents, "Morning."

He held out a coffee for her, "Here. This will cure whatever ails you."

She stared at it skeptically, "I'm fine." He gave her a look and she sighed, damn him for knowing her so well, she took it from him and took a sip. The caramel late bursting with flavor and she gasped, covering her lips with her fingers, "Oh. Wow. That's…"

"Really good, right?" She nodded as she took another sip, "Hidden little gem down the street. My favorite spot here, it's so good sometimes I wish I could pick it up before work. The only American coffee I can tolerate."

"That's right…you're a European snob these days." She said with a smirk as they walked towards the house, "Which is shocking considering I used to watch you eat street meat on a daily basis."

He chuckled at her term for the hot dogs he usually devoured during stakeouts, "No, those are still great. But coffee is just different."

She nodded slowly as they took the steps, "A lot of things are different now."

Another dagger to the heart but he stood up straighter, knowing he had it coming, "Yeah. I guess they are. But…not everything is different."

She looked over at him and could see the twinkle in his eye. The one that she'd spot on late nights at work when it was just the two of them. The look that often made her wonder if they were more than just friends. Biting her lip she looked aside, "Look um…Noah's really excited about today. And sometimes when he gets excited he gets a little…wild. But I already gave him a lecture on listening. But if he starts acting out…you have my permission to be a little firm with him. Do whatever you need to do…I trust your instincts as a parent."

He smiled softly at her, "That…means a lot Liv. Thank you. But…I'm sure he's gonna be just fine. He can't be any rowdier than Dickie was at his age."

She smiled, "He…is a good kid but he definitely has his moments."

"Don't we all." He said with a sigh, "While we're on the subject…" He leaned closer to her, "You have my permission to tell my daughters and my Mom to mind their own business while you're out. Because we both know they'll hound you with a million questions."

She stepped towards the front door, "Yeah…you don't know Noah very well. He's a mini Detective. Might not have my bloodline…but he's like a dog with a bone. So good luck keeping up with him."

Before she stepped through the door he called out to her, "Told you it wasn't all about DNA." She paused and then looked at him over her shoulder, her eyes wide, "He may not biologically yours…but he's got your heart. I can already tell. I always knew you'd make an amazing Mom and I feel very lucky to get to see it happening now."

She swallowed the lump in her throat and turned as Bernie walked over to them, "What are you two doing out here? Making out?"

"Mama!" Elliot yelled, snapping out of the moment, "Jesus, we talked about this. I told you-"

"That you're just friends." She said waving her hand at him, "Yes. Yes. I heard you. I'm old and a little off my rocker but I'm not deaf Elliot!" She reached for Olivia who was laughing, "Turn right around and hop in Maureen's fancy car. You're driving with me."

"Oh. Uh…okay." She eyed Elliot nervously and he just shrugged, "Maybe I should say bye to Noah first or-"

But a moment later, the rest of the Stabler clan, Mo's boys, and Noah came barreling out of the house, "Bye Mom! Have fun!" Noah yelled, running after Dickie and Eli down the path.

She looked quickly at Elliot and he smiled, "I promise to take good care of him Liv. If a shark comes…I'll only let it nibble on his toes a bit."

She shot him a dangerous look and he laughed, giving her a wink as he took after the rest of the boys. Olivia took a nervous breath and felt Kathleen turning her towards the car, "Come on. You're mildly safe with us. I promise."

"Who you kidding?" Bernie said with a laugh, "You'd be safer out there with the sharks. We bite harder…"

Kathleen laughed and pushed Olivia towards the front seat, "Ignore them…we'll be on our best behavior." Olivia looked over at her and she whispered, "Dad's not the only one who wants to keep you around."

An hour later, Elliot was in knee-deep water trying to help Noah, Seamus, and Kieran get the hang of it while Dickie and Eli rode on ahead of them.

"Grandpa, I'm too little." Seamus said with a sigh, "I'm never gonna be able to do it."

"Sure you are." He said with a hopeful smile, "You almost had it that last time. You just have to trust yourself kid. And if you fall…you get right back up."

Seamus sighed and adjusted the strap on his ankle, "Okay. I'm ready to try again."

Kieran and Noah moved to the side and watched as Elliot got Seamus set up as a wave approached. Noah watched as he talked him through the steps again. His eyes never left them, and he wished he had that. He had grown up without a Father, and his Mom never spoke about her own parents. It wasn't that he didn't love his Mom, wasn't grateful for the life she'd given him. But sometimes, it would be nice to have someone else too. Plus, he knew it would make his Mom happy too.

The next thing they all knew, Seamus was up on the board and riding the wave towards the shore. Elliot shouted after him the whole time, a proud smile on his face, "That's it, buddy! Go! Go!"

On the shore, Eli and Dickie greeted him, reaching for him and pulling him onto the sand to celebrate. Elliot smiled and turned towards Kieran, "Ready K?"

Kieran gave Noah a hopeful look and then took after his Grandpa, ready to fight the waves again and succeed like his Brother. Once again, Noah watched on, wishing he knew Elliot better. He missed it when Kieran took off just like his brother did, and it wasn't until Elliot swam over to him that he remembered he had to try again too.

Elliot broke the surface, shook the water out of his eyes, and smiled, "Alright, ready Noah?"

But suddenly, he wasn't. A million questions littered his brain and he held onto the board, moving along with the waves. In front of him, Elliot watched the shift in his body language. At first, he thought he was worried about not doing well. But something in his expression made him think this went deeper. "Noah?"

It took him a moment, but slowly he lifted his head and turned to Elliot, "Do you care about my Mom?"

Elliot slipped on the board slightly, he hadn't been expecting that, "What?"

"I mean…" He frowned, his eyes darting down to the board between them, "Do you care about her? Are you friends? I know that you were partners….best friends…for a long time. But I'm nine and I've never met you until now."

Elliot nodded slowly, "No…you haven't."

"So…if she was important to you. Then why have I never met you before?" He asked again, Elliot went to respond, "And don't say because you lived in Rome."

Elliot couldn't help but laugh, "Wow…you really are like your Mother." Noah gave him a look and he swore that time he practically saw her in his face, "Noah…I made a mistake a long time ago. I moved away, yes. But I shouldn't have stopped talking to your Mom. She was the best friend I ever had…and I missed her every day that I was gone."

Noah frowned, "So why'd you do it?"

Elliot sighed and let his fingers slide on the slippery board, "I'm not sure I can give you a clear answer on that kid. I'm…still working it out myself."

At first, Noah didn't like the answer. But then, he realized it was as honest as Elliot could have been. He sighed and whispered, "Mom says sometimes everyone needs time to think…did you need time to think?"

Elliot smiled sadly, "Something like that." Noah just stared at him and Elliot knew he had to say more, "I know it's probably strange…having me around. Not that…we've seen each other often. But, I want you to know that your Mom is very important to me and I don't plan on leaving, ever again."

Noah frowned, "Mom also told me not to ever make a promise I didn't think I could keep. She says it only hurts people in the end…I think someone broke a promise to her."

Many people had. He knew that for a fact. But more than that, he knew he had broken a promise. He'd promised to never be like all the other ones who'd abandoned her. Promised they'd always be friends. Promised they always be in each other's lives. Promised that he was her family, and then he'd walked away without a word.

"That's a wise thing for her to say…she taught me a lot. More than anyone really…and I owe her the world. But…I'm hoping that I can start to make it all up to her. You too…" Noah just stared at him, "I missed a lot with you too…shoulda been there when you were growing up."

Noah frowned, "You want to be friends with me too?"

He almost said it but didn't want to push his luck. Instead, he thought it in his head. For now.

Friends.

For now.

Elliot held out his hand, "Yeah, I would. Hi Noah Benson, I'm Elliot Stabler. Would you like to be my friend?"

Slowly, the corners of Noah's lips turned up in a smile, he held his hand out and shook it firmly, "Hi Elliot Stabler. It's nice to meet you finally…I'd like to be friends too."

Elliot smiled and squeezed his hand, "Good. Now…let's work on catching this wave."

At the Spa, Olivia was so relaxed she almost forgot she would more than likely get the third degree from Elliot's girls. But to be honest, the masseuse had put her in such a good mood, that at the moment she didn't quite care. It felt like the woman had cured every damn injury and sore spot on her body from the last two decades of her career.

The only problem was…that now here getting a pedicure, she had her eyes closed dreaming about another person giving her a massage. The kind that wouldn't be safe for a classy establishment like this. Just as she imagined Elliot pulling the towel down lower, she heard Kathleen talking to her, "Oh that's a great color for your nails Liv."

Olivia jumped slightly, "Oh! Uh, thanks."

"It is a great color. And you know what it would match well with?" Bernie chimed in, "Blue."

"Blue? Yeah. But what kind of blue?" Maureen asked.

"Hm…I wouldn't say anything too light. But not too dark either." Lizzie said, playing along.

Kathleen nodded, "Yes, somewhere in the middle. A softer blue. One that is warm and inviting. Kind of like…"

"Something like your Dad's eyes. That would be the perfect blue with that shade of pink Olivia." Bernie chimed in.

And there it was, the lead-in to Elliot. There was no getting out of this now. She turned to Elliot's Mother, "Bernie…"

"Yes! That's it." Kathleen said, "Exactly like Dad's eyes. Don't you think he has nice eyes, Olivia?"

Sitting up in her chair she shook her head, "Wow. Okay. We're just jumping in here, huh?"

"You know it's funny, Dad's eyes seem to change color. Like sometimes when he is calm, they are lighter."

"I agree. They get darker…when he's happy."

"Even darker when he's mad."

"Yes but I would argue they are like a deep ocean blue when he's looking at Olivia."

Olivia bit her lip and looked down at the woman currently painting her nails. She could see the woman was smiling, listening to every word. "Girls…is there something you'd like to ask me?"

"Yes." Bernie said quickly, "When are you and my son going to pull your heads out of your asses and kiss already!"

"Bernie!"

"Grandma!"

A ripple of laughter shook the women, "What? I'm not getting any damn younger here Captain Benson. Either kiss my boy or let him go."

Olivia gasped, "Bernie…it's not that simple."

"Sure it is. I know some things have changed since my day but last I checked kissing was still kissing. You all may be a little more adventurous in the bedroom than we were but…"

"Oh my God. This isn't happening." Muttered Olivia as Elliot's girls laughed.

"That's the thing about Grandma B. She isn't afraid to really go there."

"Well, when you get to my age you run out of time for playing games. Easier to cut right to the chase."

Olivia knew that was another push for Olivia to stop wasting so much time. Luckily, the woman doing her nails took pity on her, "You're all set to move to another treatment now."

Olvia smiled gratefully at her, "Thank you. I think I'll catch some fresh air…the oils are getting to me a bit."

As quickly and carefully as she could, she stood up and awkwardly waddled away with the special flip-flops she wore. Lizzie leaned closer to her older sister, "I told you we were pushing too hard…"

Beenie sighed, "Oh dear, I should apologize."

"No." Kathleen said as she stood up, "Let me go…I think she needs to hear from one of the three of us."

"You mean, to know it's okay with us." Maureen whispered.

Kathleen nodded, "Yes. Because, we are okay with this, right?"

Lizzie smiled softly, "It's time. And we all love Liv."

Kathleen nodded, "I'll be back."

Back at the beach, Noah was struggling to stay up on the board. The waves were a bit rougher than yesterday and Elliot could tell he was getting frustrated. After another tumble into the ocean, Noah yanked the strap off his ankle, left the board floating, and started swimming back towards the shore. Elliot swam after the board, pulling it with him as he went to catch up with Olivia's son, "Hey, wait up a sec kid."

"It's useless." Noah said with a sigh, "I'm not meant for this. I thought I could do it but I can't. I'll stick to dance. Thanks anyway, Elliot."

Elliot pulled himself up onto the shore, tossed the board down, and cut him off, "Hey, wait a second."

Noah looked up at him, hands on hips, a crease between his eyebrows showing his frustration, "I stink."

"You don't stink. It's just a bit rough out there today but I know you can do this Noah. I know you can." He said quickly.

Noah plopped down on the sand, "Yeah right."

Elliot looked down the beach and saw his sons and grandsons sitting down to grab lunch. Dickie gave him a look of understanding and Elliot knew that he could take a few minutes alone with Noah. Reaching for the towels they had left on the sand, he dried off and sat down beside the young boy, "Alright…let's take a break."

Noah kicked at the sand, not feeling much like talking. Elliot understood that too. In his own life, he felt that often. Needed time to calm down, to sort through his feelings. But, he also remembered times when Olivia pushed him, just a little, not too far to make sure he knew she believed in him. And whether she knew it or not, those were the moments that made all the difference in his life.

"You know…I remember this one time early on when I was working with your Mom. She had maybe been at SVU for a month or two. We had this…contest…a shooting contest. And a bunch of the guys were giving her a hard time because she was a girl. Said she would come in last. And every day leading up to the contest, your Mom dragged me to the shooting range to practice. She was determined to prove to them that she was as good, if not better than they were."

Noah curiously looked over at him, interested in hearing about his Mother and Elliot's partnership. "Sounds like Mom…"

Elliot smiled at him, "I could tell she was getting frustrated. She was getting in her own head…because it seemed like the more she practiced the more off-target she got. The day before…she got so frustrated she walked off. I told her to take a few minutes to cool down and then try it again. She didn't want to hear it…not at first. But then she took a walk around the building a few times. I waited…and when she came back she had a new perspective. The next thing I knew…she got ten in a row. Bullseye and I knew she was ready. And the next day…she came in first place. Knocked everyone out of the race…there was no competition. And from that moment on…I knew that my partner was never a quitter. She proved that to me time and time again." Turning to look at him he smiled, "Your Mom…taught me so much in the twelve years I knew her. But the greatest lesson she taught me was to never give up."

Noah chewed his lip softly, "But…didn't you do just that when you left?"

Elliot felt a stab to the heart and he nodded, "In a way…I did. Which is why I regret it. But…it's also why I'm back and I'm not going to turn around and leave again. I won't give up on my friendship with your Mom. And…" He nudged his shoulder, "I won't give up on you kid. You can do this…I know you can."

Noah looked out at the ocean, watching the waves crash against the shore, "You really believe that?"

"Sure do. You're a Benson. Stronger than all the rest. I know that." He said with a nod.

Noah was quiet a moment, then pushed himself up off the ground, "Okay…one more try."

Elliot smiled and stood up, "Okay."

Noah grabbed the board and they walked towards the water, he paused as the waves crashed against his feet, "Hey Elliot?"

He looked down at the young boy and asked, "Yeah?"

"I hope you mean that." Elliot just stared at him, waiting for him to elaborate. "That you won't give up on Mom. Because…I think she needs a little more time to learn to trust you again."

Noah smiled and squeezed his shoulder, "I'm not going anywhere, Noah. That, I can promise you. No matter what…I'm gonna be right here."

Noah took a deep breath, "Okay then." He nodded towards the ocean, "I guess I'll tackle my fears, and then we'll work on yours."

Elliot chuckled, "Sounds like a plan. Let's do this."

Together, they walked into the ocean as the boys on the shore watching them. Elliot got Noah set up, waiting for the perfect wave. He saw his sons walking towards the shore, ready to cheer Noah on and it warmed his heart. They already cared about him, that much was clear. And Elliot knew he himself would do anything to make this boy smile, and not just to get on his Mother's good side. Spotting a wave a few feet out Elliot smiled, squeezing his arm, "Alright Noah, this is a good one. You ready?"

"Ready as I'll ever be." Noah said taking a deep breath.

Elliot leaned in, "Believe in yourself kid. Just like I believe in you."

Noah smiled, took his position on the board, and started to paddle hard as the wave approached. Elliot hung back, knowing he had to do this on his own. He felt like he was holding his breath, wanting this for him so bad. A moment later, the wave swelled, Noah pushed himself up and he stayed up, balancing with ease, riding the wave towards the shore.

"Yes!" Elliot cheered, hands up in the air as he floated along, "Go Noah! Go!"

On the sand, Eli and Dickie were running towards Noah, shouting after him as his grandsons ran to join them. Elliot started to swim towards them, his heart racing. As he pulled himself out of the water, he grabbed Noah's shoulders and lifted him, "You did it!"

Noah laughed excitedly, "I did it! I actually did it!"

Elliot laughed and ruffled his wet curls, "I told you you could."

Noah wiped the water from his face and smiled, "Couldn't have done it without you Elliot. Thank you." He took a deep breath and said, "So…I faced my fears, you gonna face yours?"

Elliot smiled, and looked up at his boys who gave him a knowing look, "Yeah…I think it's time."

"Come on." Dickie said with a smile, "That victory deserves a snack. You crushed it, Noah."

Noah beamed up at him and walked off with Dickie and Eli. At the last second, he turned and smiled at Elliot, "You coming Elliot?"

Elliot let out a little breath, feeling himself relax further by the second. "Right behind you kid. Right behind you."

Out on the little patio, Olivia took a few deep breaths. She felt so overwhelmed. This vacation was supposed to be relaxing but now she was being faced with all her feelings for Elliot that she had been trying so desperately to ignore. Her therapist had told her she needed to explore them or move on. But as she had for the last two decades, she had buried them deep down once again. It was safer that way.

The only problem was, it seemed like everyone else was tired of the delicate dance they had been reciting all these years. As she went through her breathing exercises, she heard the Slider behind her open. She didn't have to turn to know who it was.

"Sorry, Kathleen. Just needed some air. Was getting a bit stuffy in there."

"More like we were getting a bit pushy and bold. Must be the champagne they keep feeding us."

Olivia laughed and turned to look at her as she sat down. She'd seen her a handful of times while Elliot had been gone. She wondered if he knew that. But even still, she couldn't get over how grown up she was. Seemed like just yesterday she was running into the precinct in her soccer uniform, telling her Dad she'd scored the winning goal. And now she was a woman, a full-fledged adult. One who had worked her ass off to get where she was and to control her bipolar disorder. And like her Father, Olivia was so proud of her.

"You know…you look so much like your Mother." Her words seemed to startle them both, "I mean…"

Kathleen smiled, "I get that a lot…makes me happy. But sometimes when I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror it just makes me miss her more."

Olivia sighed and looked down, "I'm sure it does."

Kathleen watched her carefully, trying to read her expression. A trait she inherited from her Father. She'd learned you could tell a lot from the things a person didn't actually say but by the look on their face, their subtle movements. And in her opinion, Olivia's body language was telling her she was conflicted. It didn't take a rocket scientist to know why…

"You know, I always envied you." Olivia gave her a curious look and she continued, "I was so jealous that you were independent and sure of yourself. I thought it was so cool you could live on your own, do the job you did and just not have to answer to anyone. That was especially true when I was growing up under Dad's roof."

Olivia smiled knowing that Elliot had been strict which wasn't always something his kids appreciated. Then again, they didn't know the horrors that their Father witnessed daily. "Independence is nice. Sure. But…it's a lot nicer to have people who care about you and look out for your well-being."

Kathleen smiled knowing that until Noah, Olivia had never had a family of her own. Now was the chance for her to expand on that family too. And Kathleen was going to do everything in her power to make it happen.

"You remember that time that Mo and I called you when she crashed her car? She had just gotten her license and we were late coming home for curfew. We called you instead of Mom and Dad because we were so freaked out."

Olivia smiled at the memory. She remembered how her heart had stopped hearing Maureen's panicked voice. It had taken all her strength not to call Elliot right away but she wanted the girls to respect her and know she would always be there for them. Once she knew they weren't seriously hurt, she rushed to meet them and handled the cop on sight. Then, she took them both home. Elliot had been angry as all hell, both at the girls and Olivia for not calling them. But Kathy had been the one to calm him down, reminding him that what mattered was that the girls weren't hurt. And that they had reached out to someone they trusted to help them rather than ignoring the problem.

"I remember. Someone ran a stop sign and hit you. Took off on the scene."

Kathleen nodded, "Mom said she was glad you had called us because there was no one she trusted more to keep us safe. And Dad agreed."

"Your Dad also didn't talk to me for twenty-four hours." She laughed.

"You know Dad, sometimes he just needs time to process. He was just worried about us. But in the end, he said he was glad we called you if we weren't ready to call him." Reaching across, she took Liv's hand and smiled, "You have always been a trusted part of this family. Someone who all of us look up to and lean on when we need help. And I hope, that someday you will realize we are here for you too."

Olivia stared down at the young girl's hand on hers and she smiled, "Your Mom was a hell of a woman Kathleen. Someone who I respected and looked up to. In fact, when I first got Noah there were about a million times when I wished I could call her. Or I'd think, what would Kathy do in this situation? How would she handle it? And…I wish more than anything I could bring her back for you."

Kathleen's eyes stung with tears, "I know. But…she's not coming back, Olivia. And I will miss her, always. But we can't live our lives in the past. It's time for all of us to move forward. That includes my Dad…and you."

She shook her head sadly, "Kathleen, it's not that simple. There is so much…history and hurt. So many complications."

"Maybe. But do you really want to live your life like that? Stuck on all the reasons why you shouldn't?" Olivia looked down and Kathleen sighed, trying a different approach. "Do you remember when I got arrested and you were there every step of the way?"

Olivia frowned, "Of course I was. I'd do anything for you and your siblings. You're like family to me."

"And you are like family to us." She whispered, squeezing her hand to emphasize the point. "And we would do anything for you. Including giving our blessing to you and Dad…"

Olivia bit her lip and whispered, "But your Mom…"

"Will always be our Mother. Nothing can change that. But you will always be our Olivia. And we missed you." Her voice cracked slightly, "We need you now more than ever. And we know you are the one person in this world who can make Dad happy again."

Letting a single tear fall she spoke softly, "You know I love him, right?"

Kathleen's smile widened, "I know. And I know he loves you too. And not just a friend." She saw the worried look on the older woman's face again and she smiled, "He put his family first for a long time. But now…it's time to put his own feelings first. And yours."

"I will never, ever try and replace her. Please know that."

"I do. We all do. Even Eli. It's taken him a little longer to understand but he sees it now. And he knows it will benefit us all."

Running a hand through her hair she laughed to herself, "I thought life was supposed to get easier as you get older. Not more complicated."

Kathleen laughed, "Over the years, I've learned that the things that are most complicated, are the things that mean the most." Squeezing her hand again she continued, "I know he has a lot to make up for and I'm all for making him work for it. But…maybe give him a little bit of a chance. Or at least let him get within a foot of you and listen to what he has to say?" She shrugged, "Gotta start somewhere, right?"

Olivia smiled and nodded in agreement. "Right."

"Good." Together they both stood up and moved towards the door, "Supposed to be a beautiful sunset tonight. Perfect for a little stroll under the boardwalk…"

Olivia laughed, "Oh really?"

Kathleen wrapped her arm around Olivia's shoulder, "Really. Let Mo and I help do your hair tonight. Lizzie can do your makeup. Wear that white dress you brought and Dad won't know what hit him."

Olivia's head was spinning again, "What have I gotten myself into?"

Kathleen laughed and squeezed her shoulder as they walked back into the spa. The young girl thought that hopefully, she was walking toward the best part of her life…

By the time they pulled up to Bernie's house, Olivia's heart was pounding a million miles per hour. She felt like something was going to happen tonight. Something that would change everything for her and her relationship with Elliot. She just didn't know which way it was going to go.

The girls had curled her hair a bit more, nothing too drastic. They'd done her makeup, helping highlight her best assets. As she trailed behind them, she tried to remind herself she was strong. That she'd been through harder things than facing her feelings for her former partner. Yet, when she stepped into the foyer and spotted her son sitting next to Elliot on the back patio, laughing along with the rest of the boys, time seemed to stop. Tears burned in her eyes and she wondered, could it always be like this?

"You know it's funny…" Olivia snapped out of her daze and looked over at Elliot's Mother. "If someone didn't know he was adopted…didn't know they just met." She smiled and turned to look at Olivia, "I bet someone would think Noah was Elliot's." Olivia gasped, "He strangely looks like both of you…crazy how the Universe works sometimes, isn't it?"

Olivia watched Bernie as she walked away, her heart lodged somewhere in her throat. She'd never admit it to anyone, but she always thought the same thing. As he grew up, he reminded her of Elliot. Of what could have been. Tears welled in her eyes and she was so lost in thought and all her emotions, she didn't notice Elliot until he was standing right in front of her.

The smile on his face quickly faded when he saw the unshed tears, "Hey, you okay?"

Taking a shaky breath, she shook her head and tried to smile, "Oh. Yeah! Sorry. I…I think I got something in my eye. One of those fancy lotions or something…"

He didn't believe her of course, but he knew better than to push her on it. Instead, he smiled and said, "Did you have a good time?"

She nodded, pulling at the material of her dress subconsciously, "Yeah. It was great. I needed it…did Noah behave himself?"

He smiled and nodded, "He's a great kid, Liv. Which of course isn't surprising since he was raised by you."

She smiled nervously and spoke his name in a whisper, "Hey El…"

He cut her off though when his son called to help him start the grill, "I'm glad you had a good time. You look…relaxed." Lifting his hand, he toyed with one of the loose curls framing her face, "Which is a good look on you." He smirked and she knew what was coming next, "Then again….everything is a good look on you."

She gasped despite the fact that she had expected it, "I…"

He took another step closer, so close their chests practically touched. She held her breath and looked up at him through her long lashes. His eyes roamed her body, and she noticed that they were in fact changing color as he watched her. The girls had been right about that. The intense blue looking at her now made her melt, made her flush with desire. She tried not to make it obvious that she enjoyed the fact that he was looking but she was more than sure he could feel the heat radiating off of her tan skin.

"I have to help with dinner." She nodded slowly, seemingly unable to speak. She inhaled sharply when he leaned in, even more, whispering in her ear, "But I'm really hoping I can steal you away for a bit sometime tonight. Maybe a walk down by the boardwalk? Just us?"

She licked her lips nervously, trying not to react to the way his warm breath tickled the back of her neck. Or the way his hand curled so perfectly around her hip. And good God, how could one man smell as delicious as he did? Like salt from the ocean, smoke from the grill, and something that was just so…manly. So Elliot Stabler.

She sighed softly, "Just us?"

He pulled back slightly, giving her that infamous smirk of his and nodding. "Tired of sharing. I wanna be a little selfish tonight. That okay with you?"

That could mean so many things and she couldn't decide how that made her feel. But one thing was for sure, maybe she wanted to be a little selfish for once too. "Yes."

The smile on his face grew, he gave her a wink and began to pull her into the house. His hands wrapped around her waist as he steered her towards the back door. "I'll grab you a beer. Go out back. Our kids are waiting."

As he said it, he dropped a kiss on her temple and held the door open for her. She looked back at him, wondering if he even realized what he had said and done. Or, was it just natural to him? She saw him in the kitchen getting the food ready with Dickie and Kathleen and for the first time since he'd been back she started to think…maybe this was always how it was supposed to turn out.

Sitting down next to her son, she pulled him into her arms and squeezed him tight, "Hey kiddo. Did you have fun?"

Noah smiled at her, "Yeah! I finally got the hang of it and was able to ride some big waves!"

"That's great baby. I'm so proud of you!"

"Thanks." He looked through the glass window of the door and smiled, "I never would have been able to do it without Elliot. He wouldn't let me give up."

Olivia's heart squeezed in her chest, "Oh yeah?"

"Said he learned that from you."

She looked at her son as he chewed happily on the snacks laid out in front of him, "And what else did Elliot say to you?"

Eli called to Noah to come join a card game and Noah shouted back, "One sec Eli!"

For some reason, Olivia was anxious for an answer to this particular question, "Noah?"

He turned back to his Mom and smiled, "Said he'd never give up on you either…"

Dropping a kiss on her cheek, he ran off after his new friend, and once again her heart stopped. A gentle breeze blew through the backyard and she thought maybe it was time to start listening to the Universe…