A/N: Long and emotional, but hoping the lemon at the end makes up for it! ;)

*Christian's POV*

"Anastasia, come to my office." I just got back from the doctor and I need to see her. It's been too long.

"On my way up, Mr. Grey." Her tone is light and I know she's excited for me, too.

Next, I tell Andrea to order us lunch so I can enjoy my girl in peace.

When my door opens, I stand and open my arms for her. Yes, both arms.

She beams and hurries to me so I can envelope her in the first real hug in five weeks. My arms wrap around her and I hug her tight, my nose nuzzling into the top of her head.

"Finally." I hear her whisper into my chest.

I grin. "Ditto." My chest feels full, but content at the same time. For the first time in so long I feel like she's safe. I can envelope her and protect her myself. Keep the world away from her. Take the brunt of the backlash and negativity from everything coming at us.

Ever since Emma mentioned that she tried to abort the baby using a date rape drug mixed with other medications, I've been wanting to lock Ana up and keep her from the world. I even find myself taking bites of her food when we're out, making sure that nothing tastes off or has an odd texture. I feel like everything is a threat. I was aware of the possibility of being in danger before, but now that Emma has shown me that the danger can come from anywhere, I can't let my guard down.

"Come sit." I pull her to the couch in the corner and have a seat with her, letting her curl into me while I wrap her up in my arms. "I have Andrea bringing us lunch. I don't want to let you go long enough to go anywhere."

Her lips pull into a smile and nuzzles into my neck. "I love that idea. You make me feel so cared for, Christian. You are so strong and affectionate. I love how protective you are and how safe I feel with you."

I've noticed she's been using more of her adjectives on me. It's hard to hear that someone like me can have such positive qualities, but she's ever persistent. I don't know if I'll ever truly believe what she tells me, but my heart still swells any time she uses those adjectives.

"I'll always protect you, angel. I'll do everything I can to keep you safe."

She smiles up at me. "I know you will. I also know that you know more information on Emma that you haven't offered up, yet."

And like that, our bubble bursts.

"Ana..."

"Honesty, Ace."

I don't want Emma to be on her mind, but she needs to know.

"The police picked her up and after questioning her, she is on a 72 hour psych hold because she mentioned she was suicidal. She'll be evaluated and they'll go from there."

I watch her chew her lip, mulling it over. "It's scary to think about her psychological issues. I feel like it makes her more impulsive and unstable. I worry if she doesn't stay in custody she'll escalate and do even more outlandish things. If she's that obsessed with having you, she might get to the point where she feels like if she can't have you, no one can. She might kill us both or even try to take the baby because he's yours."

I swallow back the bile in my throat. I hate her being so worried. "We won't let that happen. She isn't going to get her hands on him. I won't let her touch a single hair on either of your heads. Taylor and I will go to our grave fighting. If I have to kill her and do the jail time, I will."

"You need to be here for your son. I don't want you doing anything rash because of her, either. We have to have faith that the legal system will do its job and that when she gets out one day, that we'll know and we'll take the proper precautions."

I hold her even tighter. I hadn't even thought about Emma getting out. She's only twenty-two. She'll get out. And there will be a chance that she'll be even angrier with us. We threw her in jail and it's a possibility that we will be the reason she is kept there during her childbearing years. She'll blame that on us, too.

"What did she put in the drink?"

I sigh and release her so I can pull her swollen feet into my lap. I slip her shoes off and begin to rub them down. I just want to be past this, but she needs to know. I need to keep her relaxed anyway I can.

"She used ketamine, benzo's, and ecstasy. It's a party drug that comes in tablets. The police said there were three tablets worth in your green tea."

"It would have hurt Teddy." Her bottom lip is out in a pout as she watches my hands work her right foot.

"At the very least." My heart aches at the thought. "And that much would have eventually knocked you out... possibly even seizure. But the mix wouldn't have made you care." My hand comes up and runs through my hair, tangling as I grip it. When my other hand stops rubbing her foot, she wiggles her toes to urge me to continue. It actually makes me chuckle through this difficult conversation.

"Why would people want that?" Anastasia has never been a partier and I'm sure it's hard for her to comprehend.

"One pill will take away your pain, relax the fuck out of you, and make you feel so sexually charged that you feel like you're floating."

She searches my face. "How do you know this?"

I swallow. It's something I am not proud of, but she deserves to know. "Elena."

A chill runs down her body at my admission. "She made you...?"

I wet my lips. "A last ditch effort to keep me hard and wanting for her. It was then I realized that the lack of control over my body and my mind was something I couldn't bear anymore. That's when I switched." Taking that pill meant throwing myself into situations that weren't safe and situations I couldn't get myself out of...and when I was under, I didn't care. It wasn't until I'd come out of it that I found myself sick to my stomach and dry heaving over the realization.

I'm scared to look at her. Scared she'll hate me. I keep my eyes on her feet, working her left one now.

"Christian..." Her voice is breaking and it's like a vice on my chest. I can't look up.

She pulls her feet away and slides closer. Feeling her soft hands against my cheeks forces me to face her. Her lips are pulled into a pout, her eyebrows knit together, but no sign of hate. She scans my face and I feel so raw under her gaze. She can read me and I hate it. "You don't have to be ashamed."

"Ella was a drug user."

Her shoulders sag. "That doesn't mean you're like her. Elena forced you-"

"I was an adult, Ana. You can't blame her."

"You wanted to please her, though. You didn't want to upset her. You trusted her."

I shrug. "I was ashamed I couldn't perform... She tormented me about it. Told me something was wrong with me. I already had so many things wrong with me... but performing..." I shake my head, looking down at my hands. "That, I never had a problem with."

"You realize now, though, right? That it wasn't that your body was broken... that is was Elena. She was broken. She tried to break you."

"She did break me."

"You stop that." She throws a leg over me and I straighten in my seat, letting her pin me to the couch. My head rests against the back as I watch her and my hands grip her hips. The weight of her on top of me, of her stomach pressing me into the back of the couch centers and grounds me. Her arms rest on my shoulders and I take in her beautiful face. "She did no such thing. She abused and manipulated you, but you figured it out. You're a strong man, Christian. You have a strong mind. If she broke anything it was your spirit, but you've mended it since then."

"You think so?" I look her over, searching for any uncertainty, but find none.

"I know so." There's finality in her tone. "Thank you for sharing with me, Christian."

I let out a puff of air. "I didn't even think twice about it. It just felt natural to."

Grinning down at me, she nuzzles my nose with hers. "Feels good, doesn't it?"

*Ana's POV*

"Stasia."

"Hey Ethan!" I smile at the sound of his voice over the phone.

"Do you have some time?"

"Of course I do. What's on your mind?" I have a seat at the island at home. He sounds like he has got a lot on his mind.

"Why don't we have dinner?"

"Um, okay. Christian is still working if you'd just like to come over. I'll make something for us." I was going to wait for Christian to come home, but I can always warm it up for him later.

"Like...tator tot casserole?"

I laugh. "Is that what you want?"

"Yes, please."

"Then that's what I'll make."

When we hang up, I get to work on browning the sausage and dig out my giant bowl to mix the casserole in. For the next twenty-minutes I keep myself busy and do my best to keep my mind from wandering too much to why he needs to talk.

*Hey, Ace. Just wanted you to know Ethan is heading over for dinner. Tator tot casserole just put in the oven. I'll warm it back up for you.*

*I'll cut my meeting short.*

I scowl at the phone. *No, you won't. We need friend time.*

It's a few minutes before he responds and I imagine him having to simmer his annoyance first. *Tell me if you need me. I'll be there.*

My heart warms. I know he's worried it'll be about Emma, but even if it is, Ethan is my best friend. He'll listen and understand.

XxXxXx

We sit on the living room floor in front of the couch, using the coffee table to hold our food and drinks. Friends, the TV show, is on in the background as I wait for him to start talking. I'm anxious, but I try not to let him know it.

"What happened with Emma?" His question is abrupt and his eyes are on me.

"That's a broad question." I urge him to narrow it down.

"Okay, let's start with how Christian had her out to lunch. How does he know her?"

I push my fork around my bowl of casserole. "She's a past... conquest." It's the best way I can explain it without giving Christian's past away. His past is his story and it's not right for me to tell it.

"He fucked her."

I wince and Ethan apologizes.

"For a short time, yes."

"Why would he take a girl he used to screw on a date when he had a pregnant girlfriend?" It's amazing how this man can talk about something that is so unsettling while still piling food into his mouth. My stomach is churning.

"It wasn't a date. She begged to see him because she needed help and he wanted it somewhere public."

"They looked pretty cozy for just meeting up." He gives me the eye.

I sigh and finally drop my fork. There is no way I'll be able to keep down what I eat. Pregnancy makes my stomach so much more queasy when I am upset. "Listen, Ethan. It's no secret that Christian has jealousy issues. He saw we were there together and alone after what happened the day before and thought the worst. He was trying to make me jealous."

"That's fucked up. He tried to hurt you more because of his insecurity? You're carrying his child for fuck's sake!"

"Ethan... It isn't insecurity." That's a lie. But I don't want Ethan to think Christian's weak.

"Bull shit. It's insecurity at its finest. That's why Elliot and Kate used the power play they did with us. They knew his insecurity would force his hand."

My heart thuds. "You didn't know... did you?" The thought of Ethan playing a part in that night makes me want to cry.

He sighs. "No, I didn't. If I did, I wouldn't have taken you. You wouldn't have gotten pregnant. You would have had options."

I find myself leaning over and wrapping my arms around him in a hug. He's beating himself up over something he had no control over. "Pregnant or not, Christian is my only option. The only one I want anyway." I squeeze him tighter and rest my head on his shoulder. "I know it's been hard and with everything you've seen, I don't know how I'd feel either, but I hope you can trust me. Know that I'm doing what is good for me. You have been nothing, but patient and have done your best to be understanding and I am so thankful for that. Thank you for not making me choose and for being there when I ask, even when it's awkward between you guys. Thank you for standing beside me."

"I'll never go anywhere. I don't give a shit how much he throws a fit."

Giggling, I pull away and lean back against the couch. "Good. Christian needs more people standing up to him. He's too used to people doing as they're told."

"So...did Emma invite herself over or did Christian invite her?"

"She definitely invited herself. He was so surprised that she was there. So angry. We had no idea they were friends."

"Dhvani says that Emma is in the hospital."

I stare down at my bowl, unwilling to answer.

"When she asked her family what happened she said it was your fault."

My chin quivers. "My fault." I breathe out, repeating.

"What'd you do?"

"What did I do?" I give him an incredulous look. "You should be asking me what she did."

He throws his hands up in the air. "Okay, then what did she do?"

"She spiked my drink." I am scared to give him too many details. It sounds crazy even saying it out loud to someone else.

"What? Why? Are you sure?"

I roll my eyes. "I wouldn't make this up, Ethan. She admitted it. We tested it. It came back positive."

"But you're okay? Why would she do that?"

"I didn't drink it. Luckily, she gave herself away before I did. She wanted me to miscarry."

He grips his t-shirt over his chest. "Stasia. Why?"

I wring my hands, trying to decide how to put this without giving away too many of Christian's secrets. "She wants Christian. She's jealous that we're together, having a baby and getting married. She wants that with him."

"What would hurting Christian's child do to help her?"

"She thinks Christian is only marrying me because of the baby. In her warped mind, if the baby is gone, then the engagement is, too."

"Damn." He takes a swig of his beer. "That woman is fucking crazy."

I nod. "She has issues... and it's kind of sad to think about. If she truly believed her plan would work... what else is she capable of?"

"She could hurt you. She wanted to hurt you. Because of Christian. This is his fault."

"Don't blame him for someone else's actions. Everyone has a crazy ex or two. He, unfortunately, got one that was truly demented."

"...And now you have to deal with that."

I let out a long sigh, annoyed that he's trying to blame Christian for her lunacy. "She's being evaluated and if she's fit, she'll go to jail until she makes bail. If she isn't fit, she'll be kept in the psych ward. The police are taking care of it."

He mulls it over in his head. "She'll make bail."

I shrug, knowing she has Christian's money in her bank account. Our lawyers are aware and we're hoping that if she's fit to stand before the judge that they'll deny it. "Our lawyers are working on it."

"...While she's working on ways to hurt you."

"Will you stop? What good can come of talking like this?" I push myself up off the floor and curl up on the couch, wanting some space between us.

"He isn't good for you. This shit is fucked up, Stasia. More than, really. None of this would be an issue if it wasn't for him."

"If you really think that she wants to hurt me, what makes you think me stepping away from Christian will do any good? I'm still carrying his baby. I still have roots to him. He and I will have a connection that they don't have. She'll still come and I won't have any of the protection I have now!"

He pushes himself up and I watch as he makes his way to the kitchen for another beer. He's barefoot, in jeans and a worn sage t-shirt, but the laid back Ethan that I know looks completely stiff and stressed out. I hate that he's this way because of me.

"Emma has caused enough pain, Ethan."

"Because of Christian! Because the egomaniac can't keep his fucking dick in his pants! I know, Anastasia. I know she was pregnant and miscarried. Dhvani told me. She took care of her after. I'm not fucking stupid. I know it was Christian's."

I wince. He knows.

"You knew and you kept it from me." His tone is low, the words gritting between his perfect teeth.

"That is between the two of them. It wasn't my place to tell anyone else."

"And you don't think that her losing his baby has anything to do with what she's doing now?" He's slowly pacing around the apartment, one hand in his hair, the other around his beer. He's got too much energy... too much aggression. He looks like a caged animal.

"I never said it didn't." I keep my voice calm, but firm.

"Do you see what being with him is doing to you? Christ, Stasia!" He throws himself down beside me and I see him holding two beers in his hand. "He's left you sobbing a dozen times. He knocked you up just because we were at the same dinner. He put you in front of a crazed sociopath with a gun! He has his ex's coming out of the woodwork to try and kill the baby he made you carry to keep you stuck with him! When will it be enough?"

I shake my head, my panic rising. No, no, no. "Jack was because of me! Christian almost died because of me. Don't drink that!" He's on his fourth beer and I do not want to fight with a drunk person. I've done that enough in my life.

"Don't tell me what to do! I'm not your mother. I can handle my alcohol."

His vile comment pierces my already broken soul and I pounce. "Give me that fucking beer!" I land on his lap, straddling his legs as I try to reach for the beer he's holding above his head. We wrestle for it.

"Leave it alone, Stasia! I'm an adult."

"I said give it to me!" We both have ahold of it and as we yank it back and forth, the cold, full beer sloshing onto our shirts. "Fuck, it's cold." I yank it towards me and he yanks it back.

"Don't fight me, Anastasia. You're pregnant, I don't want to hurt you." I ignore him. I know he'd never hurt me.

"Then let me have it, Ethan Andrew! You don't need it, God damn it. This is ridiculous!"

"What's ridiculous is the way you're acting!" He lets go of the beer as I tug hard it whizzes past us, smashing to the floor.

I am panting and exhausted. I want to kill my best friend that's sitting below me.

"Stasia." He cups my face. "I am not your mother." His tone is soft as he tries to calm me but his eyes are full of pity. I hate it.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!? Stop. Saying. That!" I thump him hard in the chest with every word.

"Damn it, girl!" He grabs my wrists, but I am so frustrated that I just keep fighting against him.

"Stop blaming him! Stop blaming my mother! I'm the common denominator! Can't you see that?"

"Ana-God damn it, Stasia! Stop fighting me!" He pushes me down on the couch and straddles me, holding my wrists to the couch on each side of my head while I try to fight. My legs are kicking behind him, my wrists straining against his fingers.

"Let me go! It's me! I'm the one." I sob, my aggression beginning to wane. My shoulders ache and my throat is raw.

"It's not your fault! I can't let you go! Not yet! You're going to hit me and only hurt yourself. If you have to fight, then fight, but I'm holding you down!" I shake my head almost violently. "You're going to make yourself sick flailing like that!"

"STOP BLAMING HIM! I hurt him! I almost killed him! Jack was because of me! The baby was because I was too stubborn! I fought and fought and all he wanted was to love me! He just wanted affection and I ran! I was a coward and he just kept trying!" I'm panting, but have no more energy to fight. Ethan holds tight to my wrists, keeping me secure against the couch. "He's good, Ethan. He's so good. Please don't blame him. I can't bear it." I shake my head. "I have to be careful this time. I can't ruin him like I ruined her!"

"What? Stasia! Your mom's problems are not your fault! Stop blaming yourself! You need help!"

*Christian's POV*

"But it is! It is! All of this-I can't! No, Ethan!" Anastasia's yelling through sobs as I open the door and my whole body goes into overdrive.

"Stop it! You're fighting me again! I swear to God!"

Ethan is on top of Anastasia, and within three long strides, I rip him off of her and throw him against the wall, fisting the neck if his shirt to hold him there.

"Listen, man-"

"You reek of alcohol!" I growl, disgusted with him. "No good piece of shit."

"Christian, no! I was the one hurting him! He was trying to stop me! Put him down!" She tugs on my arm, but we're nose-to-nose and my anger isn't dissipating.

"I wasn't doing anything, Christian. Just calm down. Let us explain." His hand is over mine, trying to push it away, but I don't budge.

"Christian! Please let him go. I was in the wrong! It's my fault. He was just trying to keep us safe."

I hold him steady, but my eyes find hers. Her face is red and blotchy, her makeup all over her face, and she's panting. What did the fucker do to her?

"Stop blaming yourself! Christian..." Ethan gets my attention. "She's blaming herself for everything. She needs therapy. Please listen to me."

My grip relaxes, but he doesn't move. I take a step back and hear the crunching of glass under my feet, a broken beer bottle lay on the floor, beer pooling from the hard floor to the cream rug. What the fuck happened? "Start talking. Now."

XxXxXx

I have my Ana in bed, wrapped in my arms. Ethan explained what happened and it broke my heart to hear how she felt. Ethan is right. She needs therapy.

"I need you to open up to me like I do with you." I tell her quietly, pressing a kiss to her head. Hours ago she was admonishing me for feeling broken, while she hid that she feels responsible for so much shit.

"I'm scared you'll leave me, Christian. When you see everything is my fault, you won't want me anymore."

"I'll never leave you. I know our relationship started out badly...both of us played a part in that, but we learned from it and we've learned how to compromise and communicate. We've been doing a great job, I thought. We still can. I need you to tell me when something is eating at you."

She pouts. "Are you disappointed in me?"

My heart aches with how raw she must be feeling at the moment. "Not in you, angel. I'm disappointed that you could feel this way and I didn't know."

She slides her head closer, burying her face in my chest. "Ethan is. He hates me. I have to make it better."

"Ethan is just worried about you. You can make it up to him by getting help."

"I don't want to."

"Why?" She doesn't seem like the person to be against therapy. Especially since she knows what it's done for me.

"It's painful."

"Yes, it is. But you can't keep going around it. The only way to get over it is through. One step at a time through the giant ass mess." At least that's what Flynn says.

"What if I don't deserve to get through it, though? What if I'm supposed to carry this weight?"

I squeeze her hard against me, wishing I could pull her on top of me. Unfortunately, it's impossible with her stomach. "Do you remember telling me that just because my childhood was fucked up, doesn't mean that I was? Well, the same applies to you lady." I see a small smile form on her face at my sass. "You've had your own trauma. Your mother was an alcoholic. Hyde tried to molest you. You were held at gunpoint, saw the man who tried to hurt you dead on the floor with a hole in his head, while someone you loved was bleeding out below you. My mother told me you were covered from head to toe in my blood. Jesus, Ana. I don't know how you did it. You are such a strong woman. Can't you see that? You knew what you had to do and you did it."

She's crying, but they're silent tears. It's good for her to release some of this. "I kept the handprint."

"What?" I'm at a loss. What handprint?

"You opened those beautiful gray eyes and said my name. Your hand found my bump. God. You had already lost so much blood, but you managed to make a connection to Teddy. Your hand was covered in blood. It smeared a little when your body gave out, but I still kept that part. I cut it out of my shirt. I didn't want to forget in case..." She shakes her head. "I was so scared I'd never see your eyes again... or hear your voice. I prayed to God for hours to let you live...and to give Teddy your eyes so I never had to go without them again."

"Jesus, Ana." I breathe out. I don't know how to fix this. "How can I make you forget? I'm right here, angel. I'm not going anywhere. Do you feel me?" I press her head into my chest a little more so she can feel my heartbeat against her temple.

"I can't forget. I don't want to. It's my fault. You went after Jack because of me."

"That isn't true. I bought SIP because of you. I took Jack's livelyhood because I'm a bastard who wants to hurt people who wronged people important to me. That was my decision. I didn't realize how dangerous he was... and that's on me."

"Either way, it happened and it's still painful."

"But we're better for it. You and I have never been closer or happier... I thought anyway."

"Don't say that! I am happy. I love what we have. I just hate everything that we had to go through to get there." I can see it in her eyes that she is past her breaking point with talking. Her mind is going a mile a minute and I know that her mother issue will need to wait until Flynn can see her. Right now, it's my job to keep soothe her and calm her mind.

"Let's play a game." She's startled by my change in moods, but I have a purpose. "You need to work on your strength, Ana."

"What?"

Lifting up, I turn her on her back and straddle her like Ethan had done. Pinning her wrists to the sides of her head I tell her to free herself.

"Christian, you're stronger than he is. And I don't want to hurt your shoulder."

I roll my eyes. "You don't get to choose who holds you down, Ana. It could be someone stronger than I am! You won't hurt me. I'll let go if you do."

She looks up at my face and her eyes slide down my naked body on top of her. My naked thighs are pressing hers together, My sac and length resting in the crevice between them. I hope her arousal makes her work harder.

"I can sit here all day." I tell her, gripping her wrists tighter. The pressure is enough to get her moving.

She shimmies below me, trying to cock her hip to the side to dislodge my thighs, but I hold strong. She tries pulling her arms toward her and then away, but my grip is unwavering. She bucks below me and my dick begins to swell. She whimpers, noticing it.

"You want me to fuck you? Work for it!"

She continues to squirm for a few minutes and I let her tire herself out. When she realize it isn't working, she brings her knees up, but I lean back, my weight pushing them back down. I'm at least eighty pounds heavier than she is. She isn't budging. Suddenly, she stops, panting. I think she's given up, but suddenly she forces her body to twist and I release her wrists so I don't hurt her. She's now on her front, her elbows holding her up so she doesn't press her stomach into the mattress too hard. She tries to claw at the fitted sheet to get away, but I fist the back of her hair, yanking her chin up.

Leaning over her I nuzzle her ear. "Wrong move. Your arms are now useless." Sitting back up I grab a pillow and bunch it up, shoving it under her, taking the weight off her stomach while lifting her pretty little center to the perfect height.

She whimpers, still trying to claw her way out from under me, but manages only to pull the fitted sheet off the corner. I find myself panting, my arousal more the cause than the fight. Keeping hold of her hair in one hand, making sure the side of her face is pressed to the bed, I tip my head to the side to look at her swollen center. Even with my legs pinning hers together, I can see it glistening. I run my index finger up her center causing her to tremble and moan out. She wiggles to find some friction.

"God, baby. You're soaked. Do you want my cock?"

She whimpers and her hips try to fight me again.

"You want to come?"

"Yes! Christian. Stop playing!"

"You're so wet and swollen. Lay still and I'll give you what you want."

She's panting, but she nods against the mattress.

"You move and you won't have me. Do you understand me?"

"I do."

I rise off her legs and she doesn't move a muscle. Guiding myself, I press into her slowly, closing my eyes as I listen to her moan long and slow. I push myself all the way to the hilt, pushing up against her cervix. I wait a beat, flexing into her, before slowly pulling out until only the head is in.

"Christian..." She whimpers my name as I press into her again as slowly as I can.

"Fuck, Ana. Your cunt is so swollen and tight." She moans out, her center gripping itself around me. When I pull back out, it swallows me back in.

"So good, Ana. So wet."

Her hips move and I grab her ass with my freehand, stilling her. "You move and I stop."

"I'm sorry. Please don't!" When I push back into her she moans out a thank you.

I drop down on top of her as I continue my excruciatingly slow pace and kiss the skin behind her ear. "Your cunt is a greedy little thing today." My eyes almost roll back in my head as the suction seems to be getting stronger, her walls more swollen.

"I hate that word!" She growls out.

I smile down at her and run the tip of my nose over the shell of her ear. Her eyes are closed and her mouth is open in a pant.

"Do you? Everytime I say it your cunt grips me tighter." I've only used that word in the playroom but calling a body part a word is extremely different than using it for a person. Her body reacts to my voice so readily that her words betray her.

I groan as I continue the excruciating pace, letting her know just how fucking good she feels. I kiss her neck, her shoulders, her back, grunting and groaning as her center swallows me back in each time I try to pull out. She mewls with every push and pull of my cock and it's almost too much to bear.

"You feel so good, angel. My dick is throbbing so hard for you. It's got its own heartbeat. Fuck. Just a little faster and I'd come."

She whimpers. "Christian..."

"Tell me."

"I want you to come." Her sentence comes out as a whine.

"Don't you want to come?" I smile, knowing I'm getting her there. She's submitting to me. Her mind is no longer in overdrive. It's locked on me and my pleasure.

"No... I want to feel you. I want it deep." I feel her center quiver and grip me tight again.

Closing my eyes, I savor the words. "Me coming turns you on so much, angel. You're getting more wet just thinking about it." Still, I don't pick up the pace. I keep it slow.

"Christian, please. I need you. I need your cum."

I can't help the groan that comes from my chest. "Now?"

"Please..." She's begging.

I pick up my pace, but barely. Instead, I concentrate on thrusting hard and deep and I feel myself beginning to draw up. I grunt as I slam into her once more, my sac smacking her swollen clit and she shatters underneath me as I pour into her, gripping her hip hard to keep her in place. I growl out her name as a spasm rolls through me, making me shiver all the way through to my toes. When her hips finally relax and she becomes quiet, I release her hair and run my hand down her spine.

"Fuck, Christian." She's doing the best she can to suck air into her lungs. "I've never come so hard."

I hum. "See what happens when you let yourself go? Let me take over?" She begins to roll over, but I hold her in place. "I'm not done. I'm still hard."

Her center grips me in response and I begin to move my hips. She doesn't bother to move, but she begins to mewl and moan as I flex and grind into her.

"Good girl, Ana. Let me have you how I want. Let me hear you. The sounds I pull from you...fuck. It's so erotic."

I pick up speed and strength, my groin slapping against her backside while she chants and moans 'yes' over and over.

A dozen thrusts later, we're both sated and half comatose curled up in bed together.

"That was incredible." She presses a kiss to my chest. "Now I'm starting to understand." She gives a light giggle and I grin. "I have never felt more relaxed and completely content. My brain is mush."

"That was my goal. Now you see how good it can be. Why you might need it every so often."

"You worked me into a pile of mush at your feet. How does it feel on your end?"

I laugh. "Like I'm on top of the world. Like I just want to beat my chest like Tarzan and yell. Like everything is in its place in my brain. Everything has its own little compartment and it's put away where it should be and only I have the control to change it. Everything is right with the world at this very moment and I'm happy and relieved." I run the back of my fingers down her heated cheekbone. "Thank you for submitted to me."

She nuzzles into my chest. "Thank you for making me...and doing it without making me feel powerless." My eyes are closed, but I smile. I knew I had to get her body tired before I tried. She needed to let out some aggression before her body went limp for me. She would have never submitted otherwise.

"Love you." I can feel myself beginning to drift off.

"Love you, Christian."